How to become a humble person. How to keep calm

Many people know that a person who speaks in a low voice radiates poise and calmness. As a rule, calm people are benevolent, patient, restrained, responsive and evoke only positive emotions in other people. Let's take a look at how to become calm and reserved in this article.

Calm people practically do not react to troubles and do not pay attention to troubles. They endure all hardships and stressful situations more easily, and also quickly solve all the problems that arise in their life path.

How to be calm and balanced

Let's take a look at a few ways to calm your nervous system.

  • Take a walk. For many people, it is a walk that helps to relieve all the accumulated stress and relax.
  • You can listen to your favorite music. It will help you take your mind off problems and stressful thoughts.
  • Try to get rid of obsessive thoughts
  • Do not think about your past, switch to the present and future.
  • Considering how to become calmer, one cannot fail to mention even and slow breathing. It is breathing that helps relieve tension and anger that have accumulated in the soul. Breathe with your diaphragm. Your stomach should then rise, then fall. You need to inhale air through the nose, but exhale through the mouth. Place your hand on your stomach and watch your hand rise and fall in response to the movement of your stomach. Then hold your breath and exhale slowly.
  • You can use the old method, like the world, to count to twenty. This technique will certainly help to avoid saying rash words.
  • Try to cheer yourself up. This useful technique can be applied at any time. Thus, you can avoid losing control of yourself and a nervous breakdown.
  • Do not scold yourself and do not reproach. This will only exacerbate your condition.
  • Try to rest. If possible, take a nap. A tired person is much more likely to experience stress and irritation.
  • Talk about your feelings with a loved one or friend. Perhaps, in this way, you can find a way out together.
  • Don't drink coffee or tea. You should know that caffeine is a powerful stimulant that leads to tension.
  • Very good in the question of how to become more calm, massage helps. Normalize muscle tone. After all, when the muscles are in tension, then you will experience stress.
  • Try to set aside time for things. After this time, put aside everything and rest.
  • No need to hurry. The rush itself is a stressor.
  • Don't take on too much burden. If you constantly overload yourself with work, you can earn very serious health problems. Not only stress, but also depression can occur.
  • Don't be ashamed to ask for help. In difficult times, advice or a helping hand will help to avoid all problems.
  • Humor always helps with stress. Do something funny and fun. Humor is very helpful.
  • Try to plan your days. Worries and problems that can wait until tomorrow, let them wait.
  • Very well helps to achieve harmony with oneself keeping a diary. Leave on paper all your feelings, experiences and thoughts, let the problems leave you.
  • Try to smile and laugh more. Laughter is a good relaxation that will help keep you in a good mood and stay in a positive mood. You can watch a comedy show or comedy.
  • Learn not to focus your attention on small and insignificant problems.
  • Cleaning helps many people put their thoughts in order and calm down. Putting things in order in the house, you put things in order in your head.
  • Away with the negative attitude. He only harms you.
  • Do not strive to achieve the ideal state of mind. Nothing in the world is perfect. Frustration also leads to stress.
  • Don't try to keep everything under control. It's exhausting. You need to learn to relax.
  • Try to eliminate the habit of speaking loudly. A loud voice in itself has the ability to radiate negative energy and can even provoke your opponent to aggression.
  • Imagine that the problem that depresses you is a knot. When you are irritated and angry, the knot is tightened, and when you are calm, it is untied.

Muscle relaxation

  1. Try to tense and relax the muscles with the help of thought.
  2. See which muscles are tense in you during stressful situations.
  3. Relax tense muscles during negative emotions.

Respiratory relaxation

  1. Breathe deeply. Try to sit up straight, lean on the back of a chair. Hands should be placed on your knees.
  2. Breathing up and down. Inflate the belly, then the diaphragm. And with an exhalation, release the air from the abdomen, and then from the chest.
  3. Breathing up and down. The air should enter the chest, the shoulders are raised, then the entire upper abdomen is inflated. You need to exhale air first from the chest, then from the abdomen.
  4. Top breathing. Both inhalation and exhalation must be done through the nose. In breathing, only one chest should be involved. Lean forward to perform the exercise correctly. This is to avoid stomach breathing.

Now you know how to become a calm person. First of all, you need to have a desire to change and achieve harmony with your inner world. You will see, only then will you find peace and happiness.

How to become calmer? Peace of mind is perhaps the most precious and necessary thing in our lives. After, perhaps, love, time and health.

The more inner harmony and peace you have, the happier your life and the life of those around you. I think you are already convinced that it is time to become calmer?

Think about how often you break down on loved ones because of all sorts of nonsense?

Let’s say your husband smoked your favorite pot, your one-year-old son painted the wallpaper in the bedroom, your mother-in-law put white and color in the washing machine…

Of course, all these moments are annoying, but compared to the value of family relationships, these are just nothing.

To stop lashing out at your adored surroundings, you need to become calmer and more tolerant of the mistakes of others. How to do it?

Stress tends to accumulate, and when it reaches a critical mass, “Boom!” occurs.

Get rid of stressors as they come. At work, drink tea with chamomile, mint and rose hips.

In the evenings, take a soothing bath with lavender and lemon balm essential oils.

In especially severe cases, you can brew yourself a valerian or motherwort.

2. Get good sleep

Our mood depends on many things, and sound proper sleep is one of them. You can not sleep too little (up to 5 hours) or too much (over 11). 7-8 hours a day is the “living wage” of a calm person.

3. Breathe deeply

Do not allow yourself to "go downhill" and fall into the abyss of hysteria. When you feel that a lump has already risen in your throat, and you are ready to lash out at an innocent, unclench your fists and take a few very deep breaths.

It is better to go outside or open a window with this. The brain will be saturated with oxygen, the head will be slightly dizzy, and harmony will return to your body.

4. We go in for sports

"Punch" sports such as boxing, karate, aikido will help you express your emotions and become calmer.

You can go to a fitness center: systematic muscle tension during training is accompanied by the release of pleasure hormones into the blood.

Sign up for dancing, swimming or yoga, they help you come into harmony with yourself and teach you how to breathe correctly.

5. Smile

Look for positive things. When you feel like getting mad at someone, look at them with your real eyes (not veiled with anger).

After all, while the beast inside you is dozing, are you a completely good-natured and cheerful person? Remember the good times, which you are connected to a person.

And then think about what absurdity you almost quarreled about, and laugh to your heart's content.

6. Change your life

Dissatisfaction with oneself and the chosen path in life often affects the environment and mood.

Sometimes a person suffers because he hates his job (he dreamed of becoming a woodcarver, but he sits in the office at a laptop).

Instead of changing everything (it's scary), he attacks his subordinates and minibus drivers. But it's never too late to turn off the intended path!

7. Taking a time out

Do not chop hot, let yourself deal with the situation.

Is everything as terrible as it seems? Does a child who spills yogurt on himself really deserve a public spanking?

Most likely, his guilt is not commensurate with the punishment that you prepare for him in a bad mood.

Take a break, go to another room and sit there until you can speak in a peaceful and casual tone.

8. Looking for harmony inside and out

The more time you spend in nature, the higher the chances of becoming calmer.

As practice shows, fresh air, clean sand, pine aroma and sea breeze are perhaps the best “harmonizers” of the soul in the world.

Admire the beauty (in museums and from the window), it will certainly save the world and you from a bad mood.

9. We eat right

What kind of inner harmony can we talk about if you torture your body with trans fats, lard, store-bought mayonnaise and chips?

The more "loose" your metabolism, the more irritable you become. And who can become calm when everything gurgles and swells inside?

Eat right and moderately, and you will become a balanced person.

Nervous people are shunned and slightly feared. It is unpleasant to deal with a person who at any moment can flare up, get excited, burst into tears - in general, behaves unpredictably. In order not to be branded as a person with shattered nerves, learn to control the manifestation of emotions.

Remember the cat Leopold with his unbending optimism - "We will survive this"? And Carlson's favorite advice - "Calm, only calm"?

It was not in vain that cartoon characters taught us to remain calm in any situation. An irritable person who quickly loses his temper is unable to work effectively and make difficult decisions.

Nervous people are less "liked", they are infrequent guests at parties (see ""). Any little thing - a foot crushed in the subway or dirt on your shoes - can turn a seemingly normal person into a furious fury. How to deal with aggressiveness? How to reduce stress and not get angry at others?

Physical methods of self-control

A very simple way to not give back to the offender and not break loose on others is to begin to control the breath. As soon as a wave of anger is ready to cover you with your head, do breathing exercises - breathe “in a square”.

It is noticed that people in different periods of their activity breathe differently - changing the nostrils and the way of breathing. “In a square” means first the left nostril, then the right, then the stomach, and at the end of the cycle, the chest. Even focusing on how you breathe will distract you from the hurt, and you yourself will not notice that the situation no longer annoys you and you are even ready to laugh at it.

An even easier way is to hold your breath and exhale slowly after half a minute. Holding your breath will slightly reduce brain activity.

Remember how rarely a sleeping person breathes - at these moments he is serene and no trifle will make him angry. As a prevention of nervous strain, you can meditate daily - for half an hour, no longer needed (see ""). Just drive yourself into a state of half-asleep with slow controlled breathing.

Something pleasant will help to quickly distract from troubles. Think about what gives you at least a short-term pleasure - maybe it's a cake or a cup of tea? The main thing is that this something should be simple and quickly doable. If you have chosen something tasty as a sedative, do not forget to control yourself so as not to gain excess weight.

If at work or at home you constantly get a portion of discomfort, start playing sports, preferably with elements of competition. That's where you can dump the accumulated aggression - driving the ball into the opponent's goal or overtaking him in the stadium. In the case when such active sports are not suitable for you, do yoga. This is a difficult practice, but after mastering it, you will find "universal" peace.

Psychological methods of self-control

If you have a constant level of stress at work, and simple actions do not help, master more complex techniques:

Try not to aggravate the situation by retelling it to all your friends and acquaintances. Even with the best of intentions, they will pity you and only provoke you. First, experience difficulties within yourself, it may turn out that there is nothing to share.

Instead of tearing and throwing in a state of stress, sit down and think about what the most reserved and calm person in your environment would have done in your place.

Imagine yourself calming down without screaming. Or you can just remember a similar situation when you still managed to control yourself and not yell at your loved ones.

Write a list of your personal irritants. If you know the enemy by sight, it is easier to deal with him.

Between different activities, take the time to switch. For example, before you go home from work, sit on a bench for a few minutes and catch your breath. So you seem to leave work problems at work and are ready to meet your family in a good mood.

Start leading a healthy lifestyle - get enough sleep, eat according to the regimen, try not to get carried away with caffeine and other energy drinks. Try drinking mate or rooibos daily. This tea is not only tasty, but also beneficial for the nervous system. Be sure to exercise your body on a regular basis. Light fatigue promotes sound sleep and lowers the threshold for irritability.

Each person needs peace - both his own and the balance of others. Remember, nerve cells do not regenerate. And the more often you lose your temper over trifles, the more difficult it will be for you to be in society. Start working on yourself right now, and then tomorrow's traffic jam will not affect you the way it usually does.

The ability to overcome fear, confusion, calmly assess the situation and make the right decision, as well as avoid quarrels and scandals, can be of great help.

Try not to dramatize the situation where it is not necessary. Some people, especially emotional, impressionable people, are prone to over-dramatization. In the most severe cases, they are able to elevate any trifle to the rank of almost a universal tragedy. This harms both them and those around them, because communicating with such a vulnerable and emotional person is not an easy test.

Master the technique of self-hypnosis, convince yourself that the problem is not at all as serious (especially dangerous) as you think. It is not worth it for you to be nervous yourself and nervous others. Try to avoid immediate reaction to unpleasant news or to someone's hurtful words. First, take a few deep breaths, mentally count to ten (even better - up to twenty). This extremely simple method will help you stay calm, refrain from outbursts of anger or resentment.

Do not rush to immediately devote others to your problems, share your fears on blogs, on social networking pages. Friends and well-wishers, most likely, will only aggravate your condition with their sympathies (often excessive), and random interlocutors, and simply not very smart people, can make you laugh. It certainly won't give you peace of mind.

How to learn to control emotions

Avoid things that make you nervous and worried. Look after yourself. In what situation, under what circumstances do you most quickly lose your temper, are you able to enter into a conflict? It can be anything: the time of day, the degree of workload with official and household chores, hunger, headache, annoying noise, uncomfortable tight shoes, communication with unpleasant people, etc. Eliminate these factors, or at least try to minimize them. And vice versa, in every possible way use what calms you, brings you to a peaceful state, whether it is quiet minor music, reading your favorite books or an aromatic bath.

Be outdoors more often, try to maintain a measured and orderly daily routine. Even with a heavy workload, it is very important to pay attention to good rest and sleep. Since the cause of increased nervousness, conflict is often elementary physical and nervous overwork.

The environment dictates its own rules. An endless flow of information, a large number of contacts, a heavy work schedule become the causes of depression, breakdowns, and anxiety. It is becoming more and more difficult to be balanced, because it means not to succumb to provocations, to be adequate, to keep your emotions under control. To do this, just remember a few simple exercises.

Instruction

Control your breathing. Breathe evenly and deeply. This will help you stay relaxed. If something or someone is trying to piss you off, take a deep breath and exhale to deal with the anger.

Don't dwell on other people's opinions of you, especially if they are unpleasant. If someone is trying to annoy you, ignore this negative criticism. Get distracted and switch to any interesting activity that is worth your attention and yours.

Don't show your emotions. They can greatly interfere and deliver unpleasant moments. To show emotions means to expose your weaknesses. And this is a direct target for hitting the patient himself.

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note

If you become too indifferent or cold, others will not understand and move away from you.

Useful advice

Sleep more. Also, try meditation, yoga, or just sit in a relaxing jacuzzi. Aromatherapy is also wonderfully soothing.

There are situations in life when it is very difficult to cope with feelings. At the same time, excessive emotionality can lead to undesirable consequences.

Instruction

It will be easier for you to remain calm in any situation if you are aware of the very need to control your own emotions. In the captivity of feelings, you can do or say things that you will later regret bitterly. In addition, the ability to think logically, make rational decisions and act correctly is drastically weakened if you succumb to anxiety that overcomes you.

Try not to take the little things too seriously. When any trifle is important for a person, it is easy for life circumstances to unsettle him. At the same time, an individual who has managed to develop a somewhat philosophical outlook on things is able to remain calm in a difficult situation.

Work on your self-esteem. If you believe in yourself, in your own strength, you gain the conviction that you will cope with a variety of troubles that may happen in your life. Conversely, if you doubt yourself and set yourself up for failure in advance, it’s hard for you to deal with circumstances and not be nervous about it.

Get rid of the habit of dramatizing the situation and winding yourself up. Direct your wild imagination in a more productive direction. You should not scroll through the head of the most unfavorable scenarios. Such an attitude will only add to your anxiety and anxiety. If you feel that you are giving in to panic when nothing has even happened yet, stop yourself and judge logically what is the reason for your condition. Follow your thoughts.

It happens that a person is nervous in situations that do not threaten him with anything. If you noticed such a tendency in yourself, come up with the most unfavorable scenario for the development of events. So you make sure that nothing threatens your life and safety. You can deal with the rest of the troubles on your own.

Remember that in a truly critical situation, all the internal reserves of your body are mobilized by themselves. This is a protective function of your brain. Trust your body more and don't be afraid of what hasn't happened yet. It is your anxiety, not external circumstances, that is your main enemy, fight it.

Play it safe and think over a contingency plan in case of failure. Most likely you won't need it. But knowing that you have a way out will give you peace of mind and confidence. Again, in case of failure, you will also not be very upset, but simply begin to act according to a different strategy.

The outcome in a dispute most often determines the impartiality of one of the participants. A cool head allows you to choose the best arguments, as well as bring the most convincing arguments. However, staying cool in an argument is not easy.

To stay cool, you should not give in to emotions. In a dispute, this is very difficult to do, especially if the interlocutor does not even try to listen to you. Getting out of yourself in this situation is incredibly simple: you just have to go a little on about your emotions. To avoid this, try to maintain self-control. Carefully analyze your thoughts, be ironic about any comments and attacks, do not be afraid to repeat what has been said.

Breathe right

Self-control is like a muscle. The more actively it is involved, the weaker it becomes over time. Therefore, if at the beginning of the dispute you could adequately respond to your opponent, then towards the end there is a strong desire to break loose and scream. The prefrontal cortex is responsible for self-control. It is from her activity that composure depends to a greater extent.

The best way to distract from unnecessary emotions and regain control is breathing. A fast rhythm helps to activate muscle activity, a slow one - brain activity. Therefore, if you feel that you are starting to get annoyed and go along with the other participant in the dispute, then just slow down your breathing. Take a few deep breaths in and out. Try to keep the breathing cycle longer each time.

Consider

Another way to quickly regain self-control and an open mind about an argument is to count. This mechanism does not yet have an exact scientific interpretation, but it is commonly believed that counting helps the brain to structure its activities. If your head is porridge or complete chaos, then the account is the best solution.

First, just count to ten. You can combine this technique with breathing. For example, inhale for 3-4 counts, and then exhale for another 5-6 counts. This will allow you to take a break and recover for a short time. Do not get too distracted by the count, otherwise you can lose the essence of the conversation.

Speak slowly

This will allow you to think over the words of the interlocutor longer, and you will also be able to pick up much stronger arguments. Under no circumstances should you rush. Sometimes a thoughtless phrase can cost you dearly. It is better to spend an extra few seconds thinking about the answer than immediately blurt out a prepared phrase.

Keeping your cool during an argument will also help you maintain a clear understanding of your position. If you simply refute the interlocutor, you are unlikely to be able to control emotions. Formulate a specific position and stick to it. This is how you will not only be able to adequately hold out in a verbal controversy, but you will also have a better chance of winning.

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Sometimes life presents such situations in which every little thing annoys: the husband does not thank for dinner, and the children do not want to collect toys, and the boss reprimands for the task not completed on time ...

Is it possible to get rid of superficial irritability and become self-confident? Psychologists assure that it is not only possible, but also necessary: ​​it makes life much easier and helps to maintain peace and balance.

Why does a person lose his composure?

Having exploded once again on some trifling occasion, the woman begins to think about how to be calm and not be nervous. Sedative pills, heart-to-heart conversations with a close friend, auto-training and even a loud count to ten in a critical situation are used. But the exhausted organism demands its own, and again follows a breakdown with ridiculous decisions dictated not by common sense, but by impulse and momentary emotions.

Each time, the loss of calmness is repeated simply because there is no exact and only true recipe for how to remain calm in any situation. Therefore, before looking for ways out of this situation, it is worth understanding its causes. Why do some women lose their calm over trifling reasons, while others can boast of iron restraint?

Among the most common causes of loss of calm note:

  • "Triggers", that is, things, people or events that annoy us for reasons we do not understand: for example, a neighbor with a dog or rush hour on the subway.
  • Prolonged depression, combined with hopelessness and excitement, can cause irascibility.
  • Chronic fatigue and lack of vitamins can also provoke a loss of calm.
  • The presence of physical discomfort: when a person is hungry or cold, even a minor reason is enough to piss him off.
  • The presence of diseases: for example, with diabetes mellitus or thyroid diseases, increased irritability is often noted.

By identifying the cause of your irritation, you can solve it, and not cope with the consequences of a short temper, which only signals, for example, fatigue or malaise.

FACT! During pregnancy, many women experience difficulty with balance and the adequacy of reactions to familiar situations. Do not be afraid - this is just the action of a changing hormonal background.

Peace, only peace!

Psychologists say with confidence: despite the fact that there is no universal method of how to become calm and not nervous, each person can learn to remain calm in certain life situations.

  • Change the way you see things. Look at the world through the prism of the positive: love yourself and others. Forgive yourself and others for minor mistakes and shortcomings, do not reproach and do not press. Be patient and understanding, learn to stop your irritation. Before you worry, consider the appropriateness of this behavior: what will change and who will benefit from worry.
  • Change your behavior. If a stressful situation is inevitable, then you should change your reaction to it: try to restrain your negative reaction, simulate the development of the situation, avoid communicating with people who are prone to drama. Look at things through the eyes of a grandmother, a kind old woman wise by life experience.
  • Relax. In any situation, it is important to try to remain calm. To do this, psychologists advise to relax, and everyone does it in their own way: someone listens to quiet music, someone uses aromatic oils, someone meditates. For many women, children and animals are a calming factor, so play with your baby and cat for therapeutic purposes.

These simple and transparent tips will help you understand how to learn to be calm and realize your dreams of balance.

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It is never too late to change your behavior and learn to calmly perceive the world around you and people. Only after a woman begins to look at the world calmly and balanced, she understands how much peace means in life. Your peace of mind is the key to personal and family well-being, a friendly climate at work and strong friendships.