The psychology of human persuasion. How to develop the skill of persuasion

Someone still believes that the ability to persuade is a natural gift, and if you have this gift, success in society is guaranteed. Yes, indeed, there are people who naturally possess this skill, but if you are not one of them, do not be discouraged!

You can learn how to be persuasive, many books have been written about it. All that is required is the knowledge and ability to put into practice special techniques and techniques, as well as a little self-confidence.

The techniques that you will learn about today can be used not only to convince clients, but also in communicating with any people. In interaction with clients, they will help build the negotiation process more competently and convincingly.

1. Get consent in principle

The reception is as follows: at the very beginning of the conversation, you try to get a positive answer from the interlocutor to the most important question. If you've got the client's agreement in principle, it's much easier to work out the various details.

Example:

“Ivan Ivanovich, I will send you an invoice by mail. And let's solve a few more questions: is there a need for additional equipment? Do you need delivery of products to the warehouse?

2. "Just don't look away"

It's no secret that when talking with a client, you need to establish eye contact with him. However, not everyone knows that by looking closely into the eyes of the interlocutor, you can get more information from him without asking again. This can be used if you feel that his answer is not complete.

3. Let it speak

A competent seller is not one that talks a lot, but one that knows how to listen. Let the client speak, and if necessary, ask leading questions. Remember that questions should be open-ended. To correctly build an open question, start it with one of the interrogative pronouns: what, where, how, what, in what way, why, why, when, etc.

Examples of open questions:

“What do you think about…”; “How do you feel about…”; What features of the product are important to you?

4. Confidence, no matter what

Even if you are not completely sure what you are saying, try not to let your intonation give it away. Indeed, according to the French writer Delphine Girardin, “Only intonation convinces.”

5. Refer to authorities

In a conversation with a client, casually mention one of your big clients that you are proud of. You can tell that you yourself (or your colleagues) use the product that you offer and are very satisfied with it.

Example:

“Two of my colleagues went on vacation with this package and they are very satisfied. They're going back next year."

6. Emotional arguments

When talking about the benefits of your product, start with those arguments that evoke positive emotions and feelings. This technique is especially effective if your client is a woman.

Example:

“When the water in this kettle boils, the heat changes the color of the plastic from blue to pink.”

7. A secret to the whole world

Use the phrases "to be honest ...", "I'll tell you a secret" in your conversation. Thus, you seem to take a person as an ally, show him your trust, and he is more likely to believe you.

Example:

“Honestly, the promotion for this product has already ended, and we have extended it especially for you.”

8. Strong, stronger, the strongest

As a rule, the last piece of information is best remembered. Therefore, in a conversation with a client, it is worth leaving the strongest arguments for last, and not starting with them (as is usually done).

Example:

“Our employee will advise you on all issues of using this program. Installation is free. And most importantly, you get a 30% discount on all services of our company.”

Homework

Choose from the proposed list one technique you like the most and try to implement it in the practice of interacting with your clients in the near future.

The ability to convince should be applied in many life situations, while it can and should be developed. But, before you start training, it is worth remembering that the foundation of mutual understanding with the interlocutor is your smile, the desire to maintain a high level, both at home and your colleague, and at the same time, you should not forget to be polite and friendly.

Ability to convince people

Use the following techniques, which will undoubtedly teach you the ability to convince the interlocutor:

  1. Try to make sure that your desire, in which you are trying to convince the listener, turns into his, because it is the latter that drives everyone. Do you want to get something? Convince yourself that this is not necessary for you, but for him. Remember the teachings of the great Carnegie: "Before you catch a fish, find out what goodies it prefers."
  2. Never seek to have discussions. They are impossible to win.
  3. Get rid of criticism. Do you want the interlocutor to go over to your side? Then turn him into your ally.
  4. Strive to awaken in the one you convince only the most noble qualities of the soul.
  5. Don't push things to the point where your partner says no. After all, the one who once refused is unlikely to change his mind, because the one who often reconsiders his beliefs loses respect from society.
  6. The ability to convince in business communication is important, as well as the influence on the interlocutor in everyday life. Therefore, it should be remembered that when you persuade someone to your opinion, talk less about yourself, most of the time be a listener.
  7. Try to give the impression that your thought belongs to the interlocutor. To do this, it is enough to seek advice or help from the one you need to convince. Drop the mentoring tone. A weak particle in everyone is the distribution of advice. Use it.
  8. Exude confidence. Do not believe in your own strength? It is possible then that others will not believe.

Hello dear readers! We have to convince people in different situations: at work, at school, in personal life. Remember the last moment when you had to communicate with a person to persuade him to your side. Was it easy for you? If you are reading this article, then most likely you have failed. But it is so important to know how to properly persuade a person. But this skill can be easily learned. Therefore, today I want to talk about how to convince people in various life situations, what should definitely be emphasized and what should definitely be avoided.

If you want to master the skill of persuasion, then you can not do without this book: Robert Cialdini " Psychology of influence. Persuade. Act. defend yourself". It is she who reveals this topic in its entirety, in an understandable language, it provides clear and simple examples on which you can easily learn to convince anyone.

Power of persuasion

The ability to get a person to accept your position is extremely useful in various areas of life. Persuade. Arrange with your lover to go to the cinema. Make a friend go on a diet together and so on. In all these situations, it is extremely important to understand how best to influence the interlocutor in order to incline to your opinion and push him to the actions you need.

If today it is extremely difficult for you to be with you, do not be upset and do not worry. This is a skill that can and should be developed every day, albeit in small portions. Start small and work your way up. Of course, you most likely won’t be able to perform complex techniques right away, because this requires experience. That is why I warn you against haste.

What does it mean to convince another person? Give the necessary arguments, show an example, make you think in such a way as to direct the actions of a person in the direction you need. It is extremely important to understand the real beliefs of the person himself.

Remember that all people do only what brings them material, mental or moral benefits. That is what your actions should be aimed at. Show the person the benefit they will receive.

The process of persuasion depends on many factors. You need to win over only one person or a whole group to your side; you are trying to negotiate with your boss or your girlfriend; in front of you is a person or benevolent regarding your idea. All this involves completely different tactics. Let's deal with each situation in more detail.

persuasive speech

I want to start by preparing a speech. When you need to pitch a new product in front of clients, or convince a board of directors about a new direction for your business, or make an impressive appearance in front of an examining board. All of the principles below can be useful to you in a personal conversation, when you need to win over just one person to your side.

The first principle is your understanding of the essence. In order to convince the many, to win over the majority, you need to clearly understand the intentions and goals. If you are not confident in your belief, then it will immediately catch your eye.

You should not just prove, you should show all the charm of your idea and the benefit for the audience you are speaking to. You will gain more credibility if people see your confidence and determination.

The second equally important point is the structure of your speech. A poorly prepared speech will leave behind only a bitter aftertaste and disappointment in the speaker. Therefore, it is extremely important for you to learn how to plan your speech correctly.

How to build a presentation? First comes the introduction. It should be short, concise and indicate the essence of your further speech. You can start off with a serious tone, or you can start with a joke, which will give the presentation a lighter and more casual format.

After the introduction comes the main part. Emphasize how you speak. It's just as important as what you say. Persuasive speech should be clear, easy to understand, logical and coherent. Do not fuss, do not try to cram as many examples, evidence and arguments into the speech as possible. Stop at two or three of the most powerful and backed by authoritative sources.

Break your speech into small blocks. Information is best absorbed in short and precise expressions. Do not be afraid to ask the audience questions and boldly answer your questions. But be careful, improvisation has its pitfalls. Therefore, try to think in advance what questions you may be asked.

And if you really have to improvise, then for preparation you can not do without the article "".

At the end, briefly recap the whole speech with the main points, and make the main statement, which should encourage people to take certain steps (buy your product, enroll in courses, and so on).

Useful tricks

Now let's talk about what tricks you can use to convince a person in a personal conversation.
When you speak, be careful with your language. The same information can be presented under completely different sauces. I suggest you think about the following two phrases: “I have no money” and “I am currently experiencing a little financial difficulty.” Where do you see the difference in these phrases?

When you win over a person to your side, then try to use emotionally charged words. A meager and faded argument, even if it is well supported, will cause much less response than an emotional speech.

When you talk to a person, you can gain more trust from him through gestures and facial expressions. This is done in a simple and uncomplicated way - to take his pose. When we are like a person, then he subconsciously feels sympathy for us and trusts our words more. You can learn more about body language in the article "".

In the psychology of persuasion, there is a great technique that marketers use everywhere - creating a visible scarcity. We all want to have something unique and special. Therefore, when a limited batch of any product is produced, the store is bursting with queues.

A useful example of long-term persuasion is exchange. In order to get what you want from a certain person, give him something. For example, lend a neighbor a drill, give your boss tickets to the opera, give a friend. With such an act, you oblige a person to return kindness for kindness. Don't overdo this trick.

Always remember to be honest and open. People are more inclined to trust someone who does not hide anything, is friendly and smiling. It is difficult to agree with someone who is gloomy, mutters something under his breath and does not evoke positive emotions in general.

Reception "three yes". Start the conversation with two questions that the person will definitely answer in the affirmative: Is the weather fine today, yes; I see you are a bit tired today, right? After that, the person will be inclined to answer the third question in the affirmative.

Never forget about the benefit that a person will receive by agreeing with you. You need to convince him not that he just needs to act in a certain way, but about how much good he will get from this action.

Touch sometimes works wonders. A light pat on the shoulder, a gentle touch on the arm, elbow or forearm. All this will help you forge a closer and closer relationship with the person. Try not to overdo it with such gestures. Firstly, each person has his own comfort zone, read about it in the article "", and secondly, your gesture may seem intrusive and will only push you away.

Be attentive to your interlocutor, speak briefly and to the point, praise the person, focus on the benefits for the person himself, do not push if you see a clear disagreement.

How often do you have to convince people? Is it easy to agree with you? What can influence you to decide to change your point of view to the opposite?

Train and practice. Only then can you hone this skill to perfection.
Best wishes to you!

According to the ancient Greek thinker Socrates, speech can tell more about a person and his inner world than his clothes or behavior. And that is why it is so important to be able to build communication in such a way that the bridge connecting your inner world with the outer one is strong, reliable, beautiful. Build a reliable bridge! Knowing how to speak beautifully and correctly, you can not only gain self-confidence, but also master the skill of persuasion, which, you see, is important in the modern world.

So, how to develop the skill of persuasion, learn how to speak so that people can always hear you - read this article, as well as a series of articles on effective communication on this site, watch video tutorials and gain knowledge, skills and tools to apply them in life when communicating.

Persuasion is the influence on the views and behavior of other people.

What can be done to influence the views and behavior of people using the skill of effective communication?

Here is a list of things that will help you develop the skill of persuasion when communicating. There are two areas in which you can work:

  • Logics;
  • Emotions.

Let's start with a logical approach, the meaning of which lies in the argument.

Argumentation - Give reasons to support your point of view. In order for your argumentation to be as effective as possible, it makes sense to adhere to a certain sequence of actions - the Argumentation Algorithm.

Argumentation algorithm:

  • Formulate goal, for which you will use the argumentation process. That is, to clearly define for yourself what result you want to receive.
  • Define your audience. Who are the people you need to convince?
  • Determine the needs of your audience. What is important for them, what do they want, what do they expect from communication with you?
  • Formulate thesis- the main idea, the idea that you will prove.
  • Find arguments that will show the audience the truth of your thesis.
  • Choose a method of proof, that is, a method of connecting arguments with the thesis being defended.

And now we will sequentially consider the steps of our algorithm and determine the tools and approaches that may be useful.

1. Formulate a goal:

  • Clarify the goal for yourself;
  • Structure the process of achieving the goal;
  • Motivate yourself to achieve the goal.

You can use any goal setting method you know. You can read more about this in the article.

2. Define the audience.

You don't need any unique tools here. The result of your work at this step will be a clear understanding of who you will talk to. Who are these people, what do they do, what are they interested in, etc.

3. Determine the needs of the audience.

Based on the information obtained in the previous step, you need to determine how you can motivate listeners, what information will be important and useful for them. Everyone knows the tool for identifying needs. These are questions.

But not all questions are equally useful. Usually there are two groups of questions: open and closed.

  • Open-ended questions are those that require a detailed answer. They cannot be answered "yes" or "no". They start with "when", "where", "how", etc.
    Example: How can you influence the views and behavior of others?
  • Closed questions do not require a detailed answer. They can be answered "yes" or "no".
    Example: Does logic help to influence the views and behavior of other people?

From the definitions and examples, it can be seen that open-ended questions are more effective than closed questions in ascertaining the needs of the audience.

4. Formulate a thesis.

Only after you have defined your goal and figured out the characteristics and needs of the audience, it makes sense to move on to the formulation of the thesis.

Thesis- A statement that needs to be proven.

The wording should take into account everything that you already know about your listeners. Try to make the thesis understandable to them and not cause negative emotions. Knowing the audience will help you with this - speak their language, connect the thesis with what is important to the audience.

5. Pick up arguments.

Argument- a true proposition that is used for proof.

Please note: only such a judgment that your listeners perceive as true can be an argument. If this is not so, if the audience questions the truth of your statements, then what you say is not an argument - this is another thesis, which, in turn, requires justification.

What information can serve as arguments:

  • Specific facts that you can document;
  • Definitions of concepts that exist in each field of activity;
  • Axioms are judgments accepted without proof when constructing theories in such disciplines as mathematics, mechanics, physics, etc.
  • Proven laws of nature (and legal laws, if we're talking about reasoning in a courtroom).

6. Choose a method of proof.

Method of proof - a way to establish a logical connection between the thesis and arguments.

We will consider three main methods of proof:

  • direct;
  • indirect;
  • Socrates method.

Direct proof is constructed according to the scheme: from the fact that the arguments "A" and "B" are true, it follows that the thesis "C" is also true.

For example:

  • The law of supply and demand says that, other things being equal, a decrease in the price of a product leads to an increase in demand for it (argument No. 1
  • We have lowered the price of our products (argument #2)
  • => Therefore, our sales should increase (thesis)

circumstantial evidence based on the refutation of the opponent's thesis.

Rebuttal methods:

  • Give facts that contradict the thesis of the opponent;
  • Refute the facts given by the opponent;
  • Show the falsity of the consequences of the opponent's thesis (Reduction to absurdity).

Socratic method- proof or refutation, which are built on questions to the interlocutor. In this case, our task is to translate arguments into questions.

For example:

  • What do you think will happen to demand if we lower the price of our product, other things being equal?
  • Do you know that since the beginning of this month we have reduced the price of our products by 20%?
  • How do you think the demand for our products will change?

The effectiveness of the Socratic method is explained by the fact that a person tends to trust more the conclusions that he came to on his own. In this case, he himself answered your questions and made sure that the demand for products should grow.

In this article, we briefly reviewed the Argumentation Algorithm.

In the next article, we will look at the mistakes and tricks that you sometimes encounter in the process of argumentation, and talk about a different approach to persuasion based on working with the interlocutor's emotions.

See you,
Xenia Taylor - Motivational Speaker, Effective Communication Expert, Author.

Sometimes the success of our endeavors depends largely on the ability to convince a person to accept our point of view. But, unfortunately, it is not so easy to do this, even if truth and common sense are on our side. The ability to persuade is a rare but very useful gift. How to convince a person?

Persuasion is a way of influencing the consciousness of people, addressed to their own critical perception. The essence of persuasion is to first achieve internal agreement with certain conclusions from the interlocutor by means of logical argument, and then, on this basis, create and consolidate new or transform old attitudes that correspond to a worthwhile goal.

Persuasive communication skills can be learned both at various trainings and on your own. The principles and methods of persuasive speech below will teach you the ability to persuade, they are equally effective for persuading one person or an entire audience.

How to convince a person

Persuasive Speech Principle #1 – A CLEAR UNDERSTANDING OF OWN INTENTIONS

In order to change or form the opinion of people, or in order to induce them to any action, it is necessary to clearly understand your intentions yourself and be deeply confident in the truth of your ideas, concepts and ideas.

Confidence helps to make unambiguous decisions and implement them without hesitation, taking an unshakable position in assessing certain phenomena and facts.

Persuasive Speech Principle #2 - STRUCTURING OF SPEECH

The persuasiveness of speech depends on its structuredness - thoughtfulness, consistency and logic. The structured speech allows you to explain the main provisions more accessible and understandable, helps you clearly follow the planned plan, such speech is better perceived and remembered by the listener.

Introduction

An effective introduction will help to interest and attract the attention of a person, establish trust and create an atmosphere of goodwill. The introduction should be short and consist of three or four sentences denoting the subject of speech and telling about the reason why you should know what will be discussed.

The introduction sets the mood and tone of the speech. A serious beginning gives speech a restrained and thoughtful tone. Humorous beginning lays positive mood, but here you should understand that starting with a joke, setting the audience in a playful way, it will be difficult to talk about serious things.

The main content of the speech

It should be understandable, clear and meaningful - persuasive speech cannot be incomprehensible and chaotic. Break the main provisions, thoughts and ideas into several parts. Think of smooth transitions showing the connection of one part of the speech with another.

  • statement of facts that can be verified;
  • opinions of experts, judgments of people with authority in this field;
  • quotes that enliven and explain the material;
  • concrete cases and examples capable of explaining and illustrating the facts;
  • description of their own experience and their theory;
  • statistics that can be verified;
  • reflections and predictions about future events;
  • funny stories and anecdotes (in a small dose), in terms of meaning reinforcing or revealing the provisions in question;
  • literal or figurative comparisons and contrasts that illustrate statements by demonstrating differences and similarities;

Conclusion

The conclusion is the most difficult and important part of a persuasive speech. It should repeat what was said and enhance the effect of the whole speech. What is said in the conclusion, a person will remember longer. As a rule, it is at the end, along with summing up what has been said, that a call to action sounds, which describes the actions and behavior of people necessary for the speaker.

Persuasive Speech Principle #3 - EVIDENCE TO SUPPORT YOUR IDEA

For the most part, people are rational and rarely do things that are not profitable for them. Therefore, in order to convince a person, it is necessary to find good arguments explaining the justification and expediency of the proposal.

Arguments are thoughts, statements and arguments used to support a particular point of view. They provide an answer to the question of why we should believe in something or act in a certain way. Persuasiveness of speech largely depends on the correctness of the selected arguments and evidence. Having compiled a list of arguments, carefully evaluate them, think about whether they are suitable in a particular case, whether they will affect this audience or not. After weighing all the pros and cons, choose the two or three most effective from the remaining two or three.

What should be the criteria for evaluating and choosing arguments:

  1. A good argument is one that is supported by solid evidence. It happens that the speech sounds convincing, but it is not supported by facts. When preparing your speech, make sure that your arguments are not without merit.
  2. Good arguments should be competently and concisely built into the proposal. They shouldn't sound out of place.
  3. Even if your argument is well supported and substantiated, it may not be perceived by a person. People react differently. For some, your facts and arguments will sound convincing, while others will not consider the arguments you used to be the main ones for assessing the situation. Of course, you cannot know for sure what effect your argument will have on the person being convinced, but you can at least approximately guess and evaluate what the result will be based on the analysis of the person (audience).

In order to make sure that you will present really strong evidence, you should ask yourself at least three questions::

  1. Where did the information come from, from what source? If the evidence comes from a biased or unreliable source, it is best to either exclude that evidence from your speech or seek confirmation from other sources. Just as the words of one person are more reliable than those of another, so are some printed sources more reliable than others.
  2. Is the information up to date? Ideas and statistics should not be out of date. What was three years ago may not be true today. Your generally persuasive speech may be called into question due to one inaccuracy. This cannot be allowed!
  3. What does this information have to do with the case? Make sure that the evidence provides a clear justification for your arguments.

Persuasive Speech Principle #4 - SUBMISSION OF INFORMATION AND FORMULATION OF GOALS WITH ORIENTATION TO AUDIENCE INSTALLATIONS

Attitudes are persistent or predominant feelings, negative or positive, associated with a particular issue, object or person. Usually, in words, people express such attitudes in the form of opinions. For example, the phrase: " I think thatmemory developmentvery important both for everyday life and for professional activities” is an opinion expressing a person’s positive attitude towards the development and maintenance of a good memory.

What would convince a person to believe First of all, you need to find out what position he occupies. The more information you collect about him, the more likely you will be to make a correct assessment. The more experienced you are in the field of audience analysis, the easier it will be to make your speech persuasive.

The attitudes of a person or a group of people (audience) can be categorized on a scale from openly hostile to extremely supportive.

Describe your audience as: having a negative attitude (people have a completely opposite point of view); not having a clear opinion on this matter (listeners are neutral, they have no information); positive attitude (listeners share this point of view).

Difference of opinion can be represented as follows: hostility, disagreement, restrained disagreement, neither for nor against, discreet favor, favor, exceptional favor.

  1. If the listeners fully share your opinion, understand what you are talking about and agree with you on everything, then you need to adjust your goal and focus on a specific plan of action.
  2. If you think your audience lacks a definite opinion about your topic, set a goal to persuade them to act by forming an opinion:
    • If you believe that the audience does not your point of view, because she is not informed, then your primary task is to give her enough information, help her understand the essence of the matter, and only after that make convincing calls to action.
    • If the audience in relation to the subject neutral, which means that it is capable of objective reasoning and can perceive reasonable arguments. Your strategy, then, is to present the best arguments available and back them up with the best information.
    • If you think that those listening to you do not have a clear position, because they are deeply indifferent to the subject, you need to direct all efforts to move them from this indifferent position. Speaking to such an audience, you should not focus their attention on information and use material that confirms the logical chain of your evidence, it is better to focus on motivation and address the needs of the audience.
  3. If you assume that you disagree, then the strategy should depend on whether the attitude is completely hostile or moderately negative:
    • If you assume that a person is aggressive in relation to your goal, it’s definitely better to go from afar or set yourself a not-so-global goal. It is pointless to count on the persuasiveness of speech and a complete revolution in attitude and behavior after the first conversation. First, you need to change your attitude a little, “plant a seed”, make you think that your words have some kind of importance. And later, when the idea settles in a person’s head and “takes root”, you can move on.
    • If the person has a position of moderate disagreement, just give him your reasons, hoping that their weight will make him take your side. When talking to people who are negative, try to present the material clearly and objectively, so that slightly disagreeing people want to think about your proposal, and completely disagreeing, at least understand your point of view.

Persuasive Speaking Principle #5 - THE POWER OF MOTIVATION

Motivation, initiating and directing behavior, often arises as a result of the use of incentives that have a certain value and significance.

The impact of an incentive is strongest when it is part of a meaningful goal and indicates a favorable reward-to-cost ratio. Imagine that you are asking people to donate a few hours to some charitable program. Most likely, the time you convince them to spend will be perceived not as an incentive reward, but as a cost. How to convince people? You can present this charitable work as a significant reward giving incentive. For example, you can make the public feel the importance of the cause, feel socially responsible, people with a sense of civic duty, feel like noble helpers. Always show that incentives and rewards outweigh the costs.

Use incentives that match people's basic needs, they work better. According to one of the popular theories in the area of ​​needs, people express a greater propensity to act when the stimulus offered by the speaker can satisfy one of the important unmet needs of the listeners.

Persuasive Speech Principle #6 - CORRECT MANNER AND INTONATION OF SPEECH

Persuasiveness of speech and the ability to persuade suggests a rhythmic-melodic structure of speech. The intonation of speech is made up of: sound strength, pitch, tempo, pauses and stress.

Disadvantages of intonation:

  • Monotony has a depressing effect even on a person with the ability to listen and does not allow to perceive even very interesting and useful information.
  • Too high a tone is annoying and unpleasant to the ear.
  • Too low of a tone can cast doubt on what you are saying and give away your disinterest.

Try to make your speech beautiful, expressive and emotionally rich with your voice. Fill your voice with optimistic notes. At the same time, a slightly slow, measured and calm pace of speech is preferable. Between semantic segments and at the end of the sentence, pause clearly. And pronounce the words inside the segment and small sentences as one long word, together.

It's never too late to start developing your voice and diction, but if you want to convince someone who knows you well, sometimes it's better to speak in your usual tone without experimenting. Otherwise, your environment may consider that you are telling a lie, since you speak in an uncharacteristic tone for you.

Do not forget that the persuasiveness of speech and the ability to convince also depend on a number of skills, and in particular on:

using some methods manipulating people;

from eye contact with the audience, which not only helps to establish a connection with it and simplify the impact (read - “ The power of the look"), but also allows you to understand how much they understand you and whether what you are saying is interesting;

from the ability to present yourself (in the event that you communicate with a stranger or unfamiliar person) and make a first impression;

from the ability to stay natural - when talking, it is necessary to give the body a free and comfortable posture.

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