In relationships with girls, eloquence has always played a significant role. Sometimes relationships were created or, conversely, destroyed because of a person's ability to communicate. Communication is important not only with the opposite sex, but also with other people, especially when you want to make contacts with them or get a joint job. The male site site will give 10 rules that will help you make contacts and become an interesting conversationalist.
Has it ever happened to you that you communicate with a person, but he causes you some discomfort? It seems that he is outwardly attractive, does not say bad words, but something repels him. You naturally want to stop communicating with him as soon as possible.
However, there are people who do not have bright beauty and great knowledge, but it is so easy and fun to communicate with them that you don’t want to stop meeting. It seems that the person is not to your taste. It seems that he does not tell any truths and hidden information. However, it is so pleasant to communicate with him that you do not want to break away.
With each century, the ability of a person to communicate well with people around him becomes the main priority and a step towards. A lot of people say that you need to be well connected to be successful. However, to have these good connections, you need to be able to be a pleasant and interesting conversationalist. And this is an axiom both in the field of work, business, and in love.
How to arrange an interlocutor?
Tell the person: “I understand you!” - and he will want to continue to communicate with you and continue. Many people ask themselves the question: “How to win over the interlocutor?”. There is nothing easier than just letting him be right even when you disagree with him. Everyone thinks their opinion is the only correct one. Your opinion can be just as wrong as the other person's thoughts. Why argue about who is right and wrong? You can just let everyone be right to begin with! Thus, you win over anyone, because everyone wants to be right.
People don't need much. Give them understanding. When a person is understood, they do not try to argue and convince, then he relaxes and is imbued with gratitude to the interlocutor. You don't have to take someone else's point of view. If you think otherwise, then you have the right to remain with your opinion if it seems to you more correct. If the interlocutor speaks reasonable words, you can correct your opinion. But be that as it may, no matter what you do with your point of view, tell the interlocutor: “I understand you!”.
Understanding does not mean agreeing. To understand means to accept the right to the existence of someone else's opinion, no matter how erroneous and incorrect it may be. When a person feels that you "accept" him, then he will relax. He may even want to hear your thoughts and ask about them. Perhaps he will continue to talk about the topic of the conversation that you are having, and come to a broader understanding of the issue. Give understanding to the other person. This will allow not only to win over the interlocutor to yourself, but also to calm him down, prompting him to look at the issue more broadly.
Often people do not understand each other, or rather, they do not want to accept other people's points of view, because they have their own opinion, which they consider to be more correct. But the argument begins where the interlocutors begin to fight for whose opinion is the most correct, right? Why start a fight when you can avoid it? Accept the right to the existence of someone else's opinion, tell the interlocutor about it, even if your thoughts do not change from this. It is not necessary to fight for the correctness of someone's point of view. You can just listen to what the other person thinks and draw your own conclusions. It is not always necessary to convince someone. The other person has the right to be wrong. Life will put him in his place if he is really wrong. You can make mistakes, just like your interlocutor. And no one, except life itself, will convince you of this. That is why many people, arguing their opinion, often give examples from life.
Tell your partner: "I understand you!". You will not only become his friend, but you will not provoke a quarrel, allow the other person to calm down, not fight you, and also look at the situation more broadly, even listen to your ideas and not resist them. Do you see how many pluses there are in one expression, where you accept the right to the existence of someone else's opinion, no matter how it contradicts yours?
10 rules of an interesting interlocutor
So, you want to become interesting, attractive and a good conversationalist. Here you need to show not only understanding, but also show communication skills that create ease in communication. Consider 10 rules that will make you an interesting conversationalist:
- Tell interesting stories. Sometimes there is an awkward silence between the interlocutors. Don't they have anything to say? In fact, they just don't know what to say to them. However, in the life of every person, funny, interesting or exciting events happen. It is about them that you can remember, tell with a smile on your face, have fun and laugh together. The main aspect is that the story should be positive. No need to talk about your problems or tragedies. Tell funny, positive, interesting or educational stories.
- Joke. Humor has always been considered one of the attributes of a good interlocutor. Here you can use jokes, funny stories, even compose jokes yourself. Allow yourself to laugh a little - draw the attention of the interlocutor to what makes you laugh. Here is an important nuance - if the interlocutor does not know how to laugh at himself (his shortcomings), then you do not need to joke about him.
- Give compliments. A compliment is a positive evaluation of another person. Who hates to hear nice things about themselves? Even shy people are pleased to hear that others see them from a positive side. No need to bombard the interlocutor with compliments. You can say 2-3 compliments for all the time. However, it will be much nicer than saying nothing at all. One nuance - really notice what is in a person, no need to flatter.
- Listen and speak. In communication, a person either listens or speaks. A good conversationalist can do both. Bad interlocutors go to extremes: either they listen and are silent all the time, or they constantly talk without letting other people say a word. You need to be able to both shut up in order to let the interlocutor speak out, and tell something when the interlocutor now wants to listen to your opinion.
- Look into the eyes. Confident people do not hide their eyes, but constantly maintain contact with their interlocutors. They look straight into your eyes. Of course, they sometimes translate their gaze. However, they do not hide themselves and do not make their interlocutors shy.
- Don't interrupt. This quality should be developed by many, because quite often people interrupt each other. Before the interlocutor had time to express everything he wanted, he was immediately interrupted. You can interrupt once or twice, but if this happens constantly, then the interlocutor loses interest in you. He begins to think that you do not want to listen to him, which means that you do not respect and do not take into account his opinion.
- Don't ask too many questions. The conversation, of course, consists of questions and answers. However, it shouldn't look like the other person is being interviewed. You ask a question, the person answers you, and it is desirable that his answer be open, touching on various topics. For your part, you can supplement his answer, agree, refute or tell a story that relates to your topic. Questions don't always have to come from you. Let the interlocutor also be interested in something from you, and you give as detailed answers as possible.
- Don't criticize. If you want to spoil the other person's mood, start criticizing him. But will he consider you an interesting conversationalist if he feels guilty, pathetic, worthless after your words? Criticism is necessary only on the case. It should be short and concise. However, you should not focus on it. Criticized - and that's enough, move on to another topic.
- Don't brag. This quality is rare, but still found. Boasting makes a person miserable, and his interlocutor makes him get rid of the imposed feeling of worthlessness. While you boast, you are proving to the other person that you are better than him. No need to rise at someone else's expense. You can talk about your achievements that you are proud of. However, do not forget at the same time to ask what your interlocutor is proud of - listen to his boasting!
- Expand your social circle. The more people you communicate with, the more communication skills you will have. Different people require a different approach to themselves. And this requires you to be flexible and understand your interlocutor, how you need to communicate with him and behave. If you know how to be different in communication, then you become interesting.
Laughter disposes the interlocutor
Do you want to become part of the company? Would you like to make friends with someone? Do you intend to win over your loved one? Create a situation where your partner will laugh heartily. It doesn't matter what exactly you do or what you laugh about. What is important is a surge of positive emotions that encourage a person to open up to those who made him laugh or were just nearby.
There have been studies that have given the same result. People who were in high spirits were more likely to reveal their secrets, to become sociable and good-natured towards those around them. Laughter brings people closer, research has shown.
How is this phenomenon explained? It is possible to consider in the mechanism such a moment as the elimination of the causes of isolation. A person in a depressed state or when immersed in despondency often closes. He trusts those who surround him at this moment. He does not know what he can say, and what is better to keep silent. Thus, contact with others is disrupted due to the fact that a person becomes closed.
In the moment of laughter, the grievances that grieved are forgotten. Negative thoughts are no longer scrolling in my head, but something cheerful and positive arises. The brain relaxes, the person himself lets go of the negative, which gives rise to a feeling of stability and calmness. When he does not see any threats for himself, he becomes open and friendly. The most effective way to achieve this state is to make the person you need laugh.
At the moment of a comedic situation, people approach and become open. They remove their barriers with which they used to protect themselves from a cruel world. Thus, if you want to make friends or attract the attention of the right partner, learn to make him laugh, amuse and delight. This will give him a feeling of comfort.
How to become an interesting interlocutor in the end?
The best way to learn to communicate well with people is to constantly contact them. Communicate with as many people as possible. Keep track of what mood you evoke in them, what words and phrases evoke positive or negative emotions in them. Practice, change your communication style, adjust your skills depending on the result, and then you will become interesting.
To be interesting to other people, you need constant self-improvement and development. Constantly learn something new, study, travel, broaden your horizons. With an erudite person there is always something to talk about, he is always interesting. Find a hobby for yourself. It doesn't matter what it will be: painting or diving, dancing or gardening. At the very least, you will always be of interest to those who share your passion. In addition, a passionate person who devotes himself to his hobby often becomes successful, gains recognition and respect in society. And success will make you interesting to a huge number of people. Be a versatile person. A deep passion for one thing should not make you a one-sided person. Take an interest in art, sports, music, astronomy, literature, etc. Learning something new is necessary throughout life, the only way to avoid the degradation of the individual. Share your knowledge with others - this is the point of communicating with interesting people! Bernard Shaw said it best of all: “If we exchange apples, then you and I will have one apple each. If we exchange ideas, then you and I will have two ideas.” The desire for new knowledge is inherent in people. And if you are the source of this knowledge, interest in you will not dry up. Learn to express your thoughts beautifully, present information competently, and you will provide yourself with an audience of grateful listeners who listen to your every word and consider you a very interesting person. Accept and love yourself the way you are. Each personality is interesting in its own way, "the whole Universe is hidden in each person." Look at yourself from the outside, identify your strengths and develop them. Do not hide your talents and achievements from people. And some flaws can be made part of your unique image. Do not be afraid to have an opinion on everything and defend it if necessary. Many people are afraid to stand out and prefer to be part of the crowd all their lives. Take risks, find your way, fall and rise again. The richer your life experience, the more interesting you are to others. Use your sense of humor. Wit and ease of communication is the most reliable way to gain fans and friends. Anyone who knows how to joke in time and defuse the situation never gets bored alone. Smile, make others smile, and you will always be in the spotlight!
An interesting personality is attractive to others. It is pleasant to communicate with a bright, outstanding, versatile person. Such an individual knows how to listen and keep up the conversation, he impresses with his charisma and love of life, has an excellent sense of humor and attracts other people. If you want to become such a person, study the basic qualities of interesting people.
Development
To be an interesting conversationalist, you need to constantly learn something new. Be curious, study the questions that interest you, broaden your horizons. Just think how many things in the world deserve attention, and at the same time how often you can meet boring, narrow-minded people. Do not be like them, study, travel, engage in self-development.
Find your calling. A charismatic person strives for self-realization. You can express yourself through work or hobbies. If you find a professional field where your talents are useful, or if you are interested in some kind of activity in your spare time, then you can infect other people with your own enthusiasm.
Interesting are those people who love their work and are happy to plunge into it with their heads.
Try to be versatile. Pay attention to all your talents and abilities. Limited people are not as much of interest to others as addicted people.
The Art of Conversation
Learn to share your knowledge and experience. Become a great conversationalist. To do this, you need to improve in the ability to speak and the art of listening.
To become a good storyteller, you need to learn how to beautifully, correctly and accurately express your own thoughts. Reading good literature and constant practice in writing and speaking will help you master this talent.
In addition, you should learn to notice interesting details, become more attentive.
In the ability to listen, eye contact with the interlocutor and, again, attentiveness will help you, as well as demonstrating that you understand the person. Of course, you do not need to interrupt the speaker.
self-acceptance
The person who, first of all, accepts himself becomes attractive to others. Try to see in yourself first of all advantages. It is better to forget about the shortcomings that you cannot correct.
Self-respect, sincere self-love, self-acceptance makes a person worthy of love by others. Be a self-sufficient person, and people will reach out to you. Strong people who are not looking for approval, but for simple communication, are truly interesting to others.
Under any circumstances, try to be yourself. Don't betray your principles by blindly following the crowd. Learn to defend your own point of view. Learn to resist undesirable influence and manipulation, preserve your identity. A charismatic person lives in harmony with himself and is not afraid to follow the chosen path.
How often do we dream of being liked by everyone and everyone? And how much do you need to do! You need to be fun, interesting, charismatic, a good listener. The list can go on for a very long time. But here's something worth noting. You can't please absolutely everyone. This is simply not possible, and in ours we have already said why.
But if it is impossible to please everyone and everyone, then it is still possible to be a person with whom it is simply interesting to communicate. This is also not easy and requires many qualities, but at least it is real. And for this you need to follow a few rules.
Don't be a bore
It is very difficult for us to understand that we are boring at this moment in time, because each of us considers himself the best in everything. Are you telling an interesting story and seeing people yawn? Perhaps this story is not as interesting as it seems. Try to complete it and let other people speak.
The most charismatic people are always good listeners.
People love to talk about their loved ones and that is why there is always a shortage of good listeners. Let your interlocutor tell you about himself. Ask him counter questions. Strangely, the people we like the most always say little.
Discuss the interests of the interlocutor
This problem is very well revealed in the book by Dale Carnegie, a review of which you can find. Ask the interlocutor about his hobby, ask questions. And discuss them. You are already 80% close to being liked. If you are well versed in the hobbies of the interlocutor, you can easily keep up the conversation. If not, then ask him for more details. He will tell you with great pleasure.
3 story rule
People are not interested in the features of your new phone. What really turns them on is the real stories that happened to you. Dramas and reality shows have become popular for a reason. So always have 3 interesting stories to tell. These stories should be exciting, emotional and engaging. People should be wondering what will happen in the next minute?
Charisma
So much meaning is put into this word that it becomes difficult to understand what it really means. Someone says that they are born with charisma, while someone believes that this skill has been developed over the years. But here's what's interesting:
A study conducted by two psychologists in 1967 proved that only 7% of the attention in a conversation falls on words. The rest of the attention is paid by the interlocutor to the tone of speech and body language.
Laugh. Smile. Be emotional. Don't forget about gestures and don't rely on words alone.
Chat with interesting people, read interesting books. The people you spend time with have a huge impact on your character, whether you like it or not. The best way to become interesting is to live an interesting life. And believe me, this will give you much more than a simple opportunity to be an interesting conversationalist.
Do you feel like no one wants to talk to you? You can't talk normally to a person for a long time? So you just don't know how to carry on a conversation. It should be noted that there is nothing to worry about, a person can learn everything if he has a desire. So, we set ourselves the goal of how to learn how to conduct a conversation and become an interesting conversationalist. What is needed for this?
Don't get too carried away talking about yourself. A conversation is a dialogue between two people. Consequently, a long monologue about his life is of no interest to anyone. Also try not to rush to express your opinion, think maybe someone has already said this.
To become an interesting and pleasant conversationalist, you just have to make friends with diplomacy. If you notice that this or that topic is not to your liking, then it is better not to ask about the details. On the contrary, try to delicately get away from the topic.
Do not hide your emotions, and if you don’t like something, it’s better to honestly tell the person in person. But it is necessary to speak out, observing a sense of proportion, do not overdo it in your reactions.
Don't be afraid to show your sense of humor. You can stir up and stir up any person, and reveal him, show his essence.
Learn to actively listen to your interlocutors, and try to remember the last phrase of your interlocutor. Otherwise, you will answer inappropriately, and thereby give yourself away, showing that you do not hear the person at all, although perhaps at that time he poured out his soul on you. The implications of such a conversation are clear.
If you want to be an interesting conversationalist, don't stop complimenting, but do it sincerely. Remember, flattery irritates a person, and it will be unpleasant for your interlocutor if you start flattering.
Speak so that you can be understood. That is, you should not speak in hints, especially to people who are not very familiar, they may not understand you correctly, and this may even ruin your reputation. In other words, choose your words carefully.
Never gossip! Then you will be sure that they will not gossip behind your back. Remember one rule, only speak about those who are absent that you can then repeat in front of them, and you will not be ashamed of it. Try to fully express your thoughts, and never criticize either your enemies or your friends, this will not lead to good.
By remembering the above simple rules, you will understand how to learn how to have the right conversation and become an interesting conversationalist. And we wish you good luck in this!
How to have a dialogue with an interlocutor
From time immemorial, people have appreciated those who know how to have an interesting conversation. Such people were considered very smart and well-read. At the same time, they were always in the spotlight, it seemed that they easily find a common language with different people and can have a casual conversation on almost any topic.
Seeing such good interlocutors, we involuntarily reassure ourselves, believing that such people are born. But this is an erroneous opinion, you yourself can become interesting, develop speech skills if necessary, the main thing is to work in this direction.
How to be a good conversationalist
If you want to become an interesting conversationalist and learn how to tell interesting things (no matter what), then we advise you to start working on this. To do this, you need a notebook and a pen, yes, yes, they are.
After all, everyone knows that you can’t return the spoken words, so it’s better to learn to tell interesting things on paper. You should write down all the events of the day in this notebook, while your stories were capacious. Over time, you will learn to structure the right speech, highlighting the most important thing.
In order to tell interesting stories, a person must have a good vocabulary smell, which can be developed with the help of classical literature. It will also be important to study scientific literature, the main thing is to select only topics that you understand, and use dictionaries and the Internet to understand the meanings of unfamiliar terms. Learn to use them in your stories, use new words in your vocabulary as often as possible, but, of course, only to the point.
Before you become an interesting conversationalist, you must understand that you will have to work hard, because in addition to enriching your vocabulary, you also need to work on presenting the topic and improving diction.
If you lose the endings of words, sometimes you don’t pronounce the letters, then no matter how interesting and emotional you tell, people will not want to listen to your speech for a long time. To correct this defect, we advise you to perform special exercises with which you can develop the mobility of the lips and muscles of the tongue. Tongue twisters will also help you with this.
Learning the basics of oratory will also help you, since today there are a lot of books and seminars on this topic that you can easily find on the World Wide Web. The main thing is to have a desire to learn how to tell interesting things, and everything else is a matter of time.
Many are interested in how to become an interesting conversationalist, what needs to be done for this, what are the ways, methods and recommendations. After all, being different and interesting is very useful when communicating, it allows you to be more confident, find new acquaintances, friends, and at the same time become better and more successful.
In this article, you will learn how become interesting interlocutor, what are the secrets of psychologists, tips and tricks to learn how to communicate with all people and be interesting for everyone. We are all different and each person needs his own approach, this article will help to develop such a feeling if you put all the tips into practice.
Learn to listen
To become an interesting conversationalist, you just need to learn to listen to the person who communicates with you. We all love to talk about ourselves and our problems, and if you put down selfishness and allow the interlocutor to express his thoughts and opinions, he will see that you know how to listen and you will become a better interlocutor for him, even if you personally do not know how to communicate as well.
Talk about what people need, not you
To become an interesting conversationalist, stop being selfish and think only about yourself. Start the conversation by solving the other person's problems and end the conversation by solving your own problems. Then you and the interlocutor will remain in excellent relations and solve all your and his problems. Many people are only interested in their own problems and as a result they cannot solve anything.
Be like an interlocutor
To become interesting interlocutor, you need to remember that people like people like them. Therefore, try to adapt to each interlocutor, but at the same time remaining confident in yourself. Copy the voice, pace, intonation and behavior of the interlocutor and then it will become easier for him to communicate with you and you will find a common language to solve problems.
Connect with people more often
To become an interesting conversationalist, you need to try, experiment and not be afraid of being rejected. Fear prevents us from communicating with others and, accordingly, our self-confidence falls. To raise it and become a better conversationalist, do not be afraid to communicate with different people, do not be afraid to impose yourself and try to help people. Communicate with those who share common opinions with you about life and are interested in your advice and suggestions.
Use a smile
Support the interlocutor
To be an interesting conversationalist, you need to keep the conversation going and share an opinion with the other person. If he is wrong, it is not necessary to tell him about it, if he does not ask you. Keep the truth to yourself and then you will not offend anyone. But if you have to make a decision and the wrong point of view is being forced on you, you shouldn't hide it. But do not just tell the truth, but refer to the facts and evidence. Don't waste time arguing and criticizing.
