Funeral words of grief for the deceased

Condolences are mourning words of sorrow who express sympathy for death. Sincere condolences provide for the format of a personal, personal appeal - verbal or text.

As part of or public condolence is also appropriate, but should be succinctly. In an expression of sympathy from a believer, you can add: "We pray for ___". Read more about the rules of condolences on the Epitaph.ru website.

Etiquette condolences from muslims it is distinguished by a fatal attitude towards death and acceptance of loss, as well as clear requirements for rituals, clothing, behavior, symbols, gestures.

Condolence Examples

Universal Short Words of Sorrow

In the case when the words of condolence are pronounced after the burial or on the day of the funeral, then you can (but not necessarily) add briefly: “Let the earth rest in peace!” If you have the opportunity to provide assistance (organizational, financial - any), then it is convenient to complete the words of condolence with this phrase, for example “These days you will surely need help. I would like to be helpful. Count on me!"

• I am shocked by this sad news. It's hard to accept it. I share your pain of loss...
• My heart is broken by yesterday's news. I worry with you and remember ___ with the warmest words! It's hard to accept the loss ___! Everlasting memory!
• The news of the death of ___ is a terrible blow! It hurts even to think that we will never see him/her again. Please accept our condolences with your husband on your loss.
• Until now, the news about the death of ___ seems like a ridiculous mistake! It is impossible to comprehend it! Please accept my sincere condolences for your loss!
• My condolences! It hurts to even think about it, it's hard to talk about it. I sympathize with your pain! Everlasting memory ___!
• It's hard to put into words how ___ and I sympathize with your loss of ___! Golden man, what a few! We will always remember him/her!
• “This is an incredible, catastrophic loss. The loss of a real person, an idol, an exemplary family man and a citizen of his country ”(about Ilya Segalovich). .
• We empathize with your loss! The news of ___'s death shocked our entire family. We remember and will remember ___ as the most worthy person. Please accept our sincere condolences!
• Little consolation, but know that we are with you in grief of loss ___ and sincerely empathize with your entire family! Everlasting memory!
• “Words cannot convey all the pain and sadness. Like a bad dream. Eternal peace to your soul, our dear and beloved Jeanne!(Grave and)
• An unimaginable loss! We all mourn the loss of ___, but of course it's even harder for you! Sincere condolences, and we will remember all our lives! We want to provide any help that is needed at this moment. Count on us!
• It's sad... I respect and remember ___ and sincerely condole with your loss! The least I can do today is to help. At least I have four empty seats in the car.

Condolences on the death of my mother, grandmother

• This terrible news shocked me. For me, ___ is a hospitable hostess, a kind woman, but for you ... The loss of your mother ... I sympathize with you so much and cry with you!
• We are very ... very upset, beyond words! It is hard when you lose loved ones, but the death of a mother is a grief for which there is no cure. Please accept our sincere condolences for your loss!
• ___ was a model of delicacy and tact. Her memory will be as endless as her kindness to all of us. The loss of a mother is an incomparable grief. Please accept my deepest condolences!
• Woe, nothing compares! And I have no words to ease your pain. But I know she wouldn't want to see you despair. Be strong! Tell me, what could I take on these days?
• We are happy that we knew ___. Her kind disposition and generosity surprised us all, and this is how she will be remembered! It is difficult to express in words our grief - it is too great. Let the kindest memories and bright memory of her be at least a small consolation!
• The news of ___'s departure came as a shock to us. We can only guess what a blow her departure was for you. At such moments we feel abandoned, but remember that you have friends who loved and appreciated your mother. Count on our help!
• Words cannot heal a terrible wound in the heart. But the bright memories of ___, how honestly and with dignity she lived her life, will always be stronger than death. In the bright memory of her, we are forever with you!
• They say that grandchildren are loved even more than their children. We felt this love of our grandmother in full. This love will warm us all our lives, and we will pass on part of its warmth to our children and grandchildren ...
• Losing loved ones is very hard... And the loss of a mother is the loss of a part of yourself... Mom will always be missed, but may the memory of her and the warmth of the mother always be with you!
• Words cannot heal this wound of loss. But the bright memory of ___, who lived her life honestly and with dignity, will be stronger than death. We are with you in the eternal memory of her!
• Her whole life was spent in countless labors and worries. Such a heartfelt and sincere woman, we will remember her forever!
• Without parents, without mother, there is no one between us and the grave. May wisdom and perseverance help you get through these most difficult days. Hold on!
• With ___ the model of virtue is gone! But she will remain a guiding light for all of us who remember her, love and honor her.
• It is ___ that kind words can be dedicated: “The one whose actions and deeds came from the soul, from the heart.” May the earth rest in peace!
• The life she has lived has a name: Virtue. ___ is the source of life, faith and love for loving children and grandchildren. The Kingdom of heaven!
• How much we did not tell her during her lifetime!
• Please accept my sincere condolences! What a man! ___, as she lived modestly and quietly, she left humbly, as if the candle had gone out.
• ___ involved us in good deeds, and because of her, we became better. For us, ___ will forever remain a model of mercy and tact. We are happy that we knew her.
• Your mother was a smart and bright person ... Many, like me, will feel that the world has become poorer without her.

Condolences on the death of husband, father, grandfather

• We are deeply saddened by the news of your father's death. He was a just and strong man, a loyal and sensitive friend. We knew him well and loved him like a brother.
• Our family mourns with you. The loss of such a reliable support in life is irreparable. But remember that we will be honored to help you at any moment when you need it.
• My condolences, ___! The death of a beloved husband is the loss of yourself. Hold on, these are the hardest days! We grieve with your grief, we are near ...
• Today, all who knew ___ mourn with you. This tragedy leaves no one indifferent. I will never forget my friend, and I consider it my duty to ___ to support you on any occasion, if you contact me.
• I'm so sorry that ___ and I had disagreements at one time. But I have always appreciated and respected him as a person. I apologize for the moments of pride and offer you my help. Today and always.
• Thanks to your statements about his [qualities or good deeds], it seems to me that I also knew him always. Condolences to you on the death of such a loved one and such a soul close to you! Rest in peace…
• I sincerely regret the loss of your dad. This is a very sad and sad time for you. But good memories are what will help to survive this loss. Your father lived a long and bright life and achieved success and respect in it. We also join the words of sorrow of friends and memories of ___.
• I sincerely condole with you ... What a person, what a scale of personality! He deserves more words than can now be said. In the memories of ___ - he is our teacher of justice and mentor in life. Eternal memory to him!
• Without a father, without parents, there is no one between us and the grave. But ___ set an example of courage, resilience and wisdom. And I'm sure he wouldn't want you to grieve like that right now. Be strong! I sincerely sympathize with you.
• Your shock from the onset of loneliness is a severe shock. But you have the strength to overcome grief and continue what he did not have time to do. We are nearby, and we will help in everything - contact us! It is our duty to remember ___!
• We grieve with you at this difficult moment! ___ - the kindest person, without silver, lived for his neighbors. We empathize with your loss and are with you in the kindest and brightest memories of your husband.
• We are sorry for your loss! We sympathize - the loss is irreparable! Mind, iron will, honesty and justice… — we were lucky to work with such a friend and colleague! How much we would like to ask for forgiveness from him, but it's too late ... Eternal memory to a mighty man!
• Mom, we mourn and cry with you! Our sincere gratitude from children and grandchildren and warm memories of a good father and good grandfather! Our memory of ___ will be eternal!
• Blessed are those whose memory will be as bright as ___. We will remember and love him forever. Be strong! ___ It would be easier if he knew that you could handle all this.
• My condolences! Recognition, respect, honor, and ... eternal memory!
• They say about such broad-minded people: “How much of ours has gone with you! How much of yours is left with us!” We will remember ___ forever and will pray for him!

Condolences on the death of a friend, brother, sister, loved one or loved one

• Accept my condolences! It has never been closer and dearer, and probably never will be. But in yours and in our hearts, he will remain a young, strong, full of life man. Everlasting memory! Hold on!
• It is difficult to find the right words in this difficult moment. I grieve with you! It will be a small consolation that not everyone has experienced such love as yours. But let ___ remain alive in your memory, full of strength and love! Everlasting memory!
• There is such wisdom: “It is bad if there is no one to take care of you. It's even worse if you don't have anyone to take care of you." I'm sure he wouldn't want you to be so sad. Let's ask his mom how she can help now.
• Condolences to you! Through life hand in hand, but this bitter loss went to you. It is necessary, it is necessary to find the strength in oneself to survive these most difficult minutes and difficult days. He will remain in our memory.
• It is very bitter to lose your loved ones and relatives, but it is doubly bitter when young, beautiful, strong leave us. God rest his soul!
• I would like to find words to somehow ease your pain, but it's hard to imagine if there are such words on earth at all. Bright and eternal memory!
• I grieve with you at this difficult moment. It's scary to even imagine that half of you is gone. But for the sake of children, for the sake of loved ones, you need to survive these mournful days. Invisibly, he will always be there - in the soul and in our eternal memory of this bright man.
• Love will not die, and the memory of it will always illuminate our hearts!
• … this too shall pass …
• For all of us, he will remain an example of love of life. And may his love of life illuminate your emptiness and grief of loss and help you survive the time of farewell. We grieve with you in difficult times and will remember ___ forever!
• The past cannot be returned, but the bright memory of this love will remain with you for life. Be strong!
• Be strong! With the loss of a brother, you must become a support to your parents twice. God help you get through these difficult times! Blessed memory of a bright man!
• There are such mournful words: "A beloved person does not die, but simply ceases to be near." In your memory, in your soul, your love will be eternal! We also remember with a kind word ___.

Condolences to a believing person, a Christian

All of the above is appropriate in expressing support in a difficult moment of loss for both the believer and the secular person. A Christian, Orthodox, can add a ritual phrase to condolences, turn to prayer or quote from the Bible:

• God is merciful!
• God bless you ___!
• For God, everyone is alive!
• This man was blameless, just and God-fearing, and moved away from evil!
• Lord, rest with the Saints!
• Death destroys the body, but saves the soul.
• God! Receive the spirit of your servant in peace!
• Only in death, the mournful hour, does the soul gain freedom.
• God guides the mortal through life before turning him into the light.
• The righteous will surely live, says the Lord!
• her heart /(his) trusted in the Lord!
• Immortal soul, immortal deeds.
• May the Lord do mercy and truth with him (her)!
• Righteous deeds are not forgotten!
• Holy Mother of God, protect him (her) with your cover!
• The days of our lives are not numbered by us.
• Everything returns to normal.
• Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God!
• Peace bright to your ashes!
• Kingdom of heaven and eternal rest!
• And those who have done good will seek the resurrection of life.
• Rest in the Kingdom of Heaven.
• And on earth she, like an angel, smiled: what is there, in heaven?

P.S. Once again about active personal participation. For many families, even a small financial contribution to the future will be a valuable help in this difficult moment.

Empathy as a personality trait represents the ability to understand and share the feelings, emotions of another person.

By the road a beggar asked for alms. A rider passing by hit the beggar in the face with a whip. He, looking after the departing rider, said: "Be happy." The peasant, who saw what happened, asked: “Are you really so humble?” “No,” the beggar replied, “it’s just that if the rider was happy, he wouldn’t hit me in the face.”

You can admire the beggar's wisdom, or you can disapprove of his reaction to the horseman's actions. Well, it turns out that we are obliged to sympathize with everyone who has a bad mood or troubles, and they will insult and humiliate us? We do not have to put on the skin of another person, “borrow” his feelings and, like a guinea pig, experience their negative impact on ourselves. Otherwise, such a duty (sympathy) would become our curse. From such "loans" we would experience emotional burnout. Nevertheless, to sympathize means to feel someone else's pain, bitterness and fatigue. A stereotype has become entrenched in our minds - to sympathize means to empathize with another person's negative feelings and emotions, temporarily identifying with him.

This is a one-sided perception of empathy. Why focus on the negative? I urge you to see in sympathy the hitherto invisible side - the ability to empathize with the peak experiences of another person, that is, especially joyful and exciting moments in his life. You need to sympathize with the joys of life, empathize with the successes and the embodiment of the goals of another. What incomparable benefit could be from empathizing with the movements of the soul of another person when he performs noble and merciful deeds. Sympathize with the peak experiences of Leonardo da Vinci, Michelangelo, Mozart and Pushkin.

Imagine such a picture. You come to a friend who has a son, besides, the parents donated an apartment and were promoted at work. He glows with joy. And then you say to him: "I sympathize with you from the bottom of my heart." I would like to see his face. Consider what we are saying now. Suppose ten people came to visit him, and everyone says: “We share your joy with you.” And everyone is happy. What right do we have divide someone's joy? Before our arrival, he had a whole joy, and now there is an eleventh part left. The more guests, the less joy. When ten people say to him: “We sympathize with your joy,” eleven people will have whole unshared joys. But, unfortunately, we out of habit tambourine "separate". And all because a stereotype has formed in the minds of people - you can only sympathize with grief, failures, suffering, illnesses and various disasters. We are accustomed to experience the bad in our past hundreds of times, and only consider the good. Although you need to do the opposite: consider the bad and experience the good. Patterned thinking imposes a statement on our mind - to express sympathy means to demonstrate our unhappiness from the suffering of others. There is something degrading in this. In sympathy with another's grief, we find joy. We forget that in addition to the troubles of others, there are other joys in life. Apparently, other people's troubles make us less unhappy. Two misfortunes have met, and one of them sympathizes with the other, resembling two weak bushes, which, clinging to each other, take refuge from the wind of life. It’s easy to sympathize with someone else’s grief, but you should try to sincerely empathize with someone else’s joy, delight and happiness. By sympathizing with the successes of others, we attract our own success.

Empathy is not only a personality trait, but also a very subtle emotion. He crossed an invisible line, and it turns from an important component of relations between people into a sticky, muddy, destructive emotion. Let us analyze sympathy in the mode of its reasonableness.

Sympathy as a harmful and destructive emotion. Man himself is the author of most of his misfortunes. Diseases are the result of a wrong way of life. The excess importance we place on ourselves, things, and situations causes balancing forces to come into play. We are given educational lessons through which we must pass. Our idealizations regarding health, money, abilities, appearance, work, relationships are corrected in various forms. Punishment follows crime. We are punished for our mistakes. And then a sympathizer appears on the horizon. With sympathy, he declares the following: “I do not agree with the world order. God doesn't tell me. World is not fair". In other words, he participates in mistakes, becomes an "accomplice" of a person who was supposed to learn the lesson of the balanced forces of the universe. He overwrites all mistakes. Therefore, one should not be surprised when he develops the same illness as the person with whom he sympathized. In addition, a sympathetic person misses all the negative feelings that a sick person does.

This does not mean that you need to be indifferent, indifferent and indifferent to people. Help the person if he asks you to do so. Just do not sympathize, do not empathize and do not regret. Otherwise, you will be complicit. Osho (Bhagwan Shri Rajneesh) urges us: “Don't be too sympathetic to people who are unhappy. If someone is unhappy, help, but do not sympathize. Don't give him the idea that suffering is worth something."

There is such a pattern: behind every successful man there is a wise woman, and behind every loser, a sympathetic woman is hiding. The power of failure is not broken. Empathy destroys strength, throwing excuses for failure and subsequent inaction. Sympathy whispers to the loser, “It’s not your fault. Others are to blame. My poor! The world is not fair to you. Your apathy is justified. I feel it." Such sympathy makes a man weak and irresponsible. “The beggar only asks for participation,” wrote A. Pushkin. If sympathy encourages one to get up and go to success, it will lose company. Someone will sympathize. A wise woman will throw a lifeline to her man, and a sympathetic woman will jump to him and drag him to the bottom.

One person had grief: he fell into a swamp and cried from hopelessness. “Good” people came to support him and express their sympathy to him. They sat down side by side and let's weep together with the sufferer. “These are kind people, how they worry about me,” the man thought and continued to cry further. And in the meantime, the swamp from his tears and from the tears of “kind” people became even larger, and the sufferer began to sink into it faster and faster. The other person also heard about the incident. He was not like the others who came. Seeing the deplorable situation of the sufferer, he resolutely said: “Stop crying or do you want to drown? Better grab the rope that I threw to you, hold on tighter to it and move it with your hands and, if God wills, you will get out of the swamp. The drowning man did not understand such concern for his life and he did not consider such behavior a manifestation of sympathy and, indignant, drove the assistant away, accusing him of indifference, heartlessness and cruelty. He left, after tying the rope to the nearest tree. Time passed. Tears from the eyes of the sufferer and his "friends" continued to flow in streams, and, naturally, the swamp did not get smaller from this, but rather increased. When the water began to reach the throat, the desire to live overcame compassion for oneself. He had to grab onto the rope and try to pull himself out. He spent a lot of energy on this, and when he got out on dry land, “good” people surrounded him and they began to rejoice with tears in their eyes that such “luck” befell him. But as soon as he saw their tears, he ran away from them, fearing that a new swamp would form under his feet from their tears. And he ran after his savior, and, having caught up, thanked him, for while he got out of the swamp, he understood a lot. He understood what true sympathy was, that the tears of the mourners did not help him at all, but, on the contrary, worsened his situation, that if he had accepted help earlier, when the swamp was smaller, it would be much easier to get out of it, because then he would have been helped by another human.

At the same time, empathy plays an essential role in human relationships. Sympathizing with another person, we involuntarily draw closer to him. Experiencing similar feelings, we become like-minded people. A trusting relationship is established between us.

Every person should come out of childhood with the ability to empathize. People deprived of this emotion are dangerous to society. Violent criminals have no sympathy for their victims. How to teach children empathy without stepping over acceptable boundaries? How to catch this measure, so as not to go to extremes?

Walking down the street with a golden retriever. It is a pleasure to look at this miracle of nature. Suddenly, a three-year-old boy runs up and throws a stone at the dog. At this age, the pain of another living being is not yet realized, the action and the result are weakly connected. He feels like a warrior. His mother is indifferently looking at what is happening. And you should say to the baby: “The dog will be hurt. You can't do that! You are a good boy!" Such episodes nurture indifferent, indifferent and cruel people who are ready to ridicule other people's troubles. For example, bus doors close in front of the passenger's nose. The man screams something and runs after the bus, stumbles, falls and runs again. Passengers, no - to help, or at least sympathize, tear themselves up with laughter. And the man is running and shouting something. Passengers do not get tired of making jokes and laughing. Then one of the passengers from the middle of the bus turns and says in surprise: “So this is the driver of our bus!”

“Compassion is a form of benevolence,” emphasizes all ethics manuals. Sympathy is manifested in understanding the other person, in providing him with moral support, in the readiness to come to the aid of another. Only when, as V. A. Sukhomlinsky said, a child understands the pain of another, not with his mind, but with his heart, we can be calm - we brought up in him that most important thing, which is called love for people.

A man's wife died, whom he loved very much. The man was terrified of the loss. One day a neighbor came to see him with his little son. “I can leave the baby with you for a couple of hours. Won't you refuse?" The owner looked at the boy and sadly nodded his head. “Of course I will. Go about your business." When he returned, he was struck by how much his neighbor's condition had changed. He no longer looked so heartbroken, even sometimes a smile appeared in his eyes. The father took the baby and asked what they were doing. “I helped my uncle cry,” the baby replied, “uncle said that he had a lot of unshed tears, that’s why he is so sad.” - "And you helped him cry out this sea?" - “Yes ... I don’t feel sorry. And my uncle had almost no tears left. He said that I'm composing with my ... composing ..." - "Sympathy?" - "Yes. He said that I helped him. And then we planted a tree with him. Uncle said that now all his tears will water this tree. Because it is the memory of his wife.” - “You are my smart girl,” said the father and patted his son's hair, “Sincere sympathy is a great power. And not everyone is capable of it.

Petr Kovalev 2013

Greetings, dear readers and guests of my blog! Today I want to talk to you about such an important human quality as compassion, its examples and distinctive features. This is one of the highest qualities of a person, only on one condition that it is true and not false. It is sometimes confused with worldly charity, or pity, how they differ, I will tell a little later. Therefore, read the article to the end.

In explanatory dictionaries, you can find a definition that this is pity for someone else's grief, joint suffering. On this topic, of course, you can argue for a long time, but I believe that this definition is fundamentally wrong.

Compassion is the ability of a person to feel the emotions and experiences of other people. It is a light that comes from one person and softens or even heals the pain of another.

Compassion has its components, without which it cannot be complete. It is kindness, mercy, love, respect and patience.

Let's look at each component in more detail.

Mercy

This two-root word literally means "sweet heart." What does mercy mean? First of all - disinterested help. For example, help an elderly person carry bags, feed a hungry street dog, just listen to someone. Secondly, mercy is the ability to forgive.

Kindness

This is a caring attitude towards people and the world as a whole. Kindness is not always obvious, sometimes it is not easy to see.

Let me give you two parents as an example. The father generously feeds the little son with sweets, cakes and other sweets that he asks for. And mom, on the contrary, does not allow him to get involved in sweets. Of course, in the opinion of the child, dad in this situation is kinder. But is it really so? Sometimes what is taken for kindness is simply the inability to refuse, ordinary conformity. Of course, in this case, real kindness and care is shown by the mother, although she is hidden behind external severity.

Love

A lot has been said and written about love, because it is such a broad and comprehensive concept that one can talk about endlessly. But now we will consider love as a component of compassion.

Of course, it is much easier to empathize with your loved ones, loved ones, because the emotions of kindred souls resonate at the same frequency. But what about strangers or how to sympathize with the enemy? In order to learn to love and feel the whole world around and its inhabitants, it is necessary to improve and develop one's spiritual qualities.

Respect

The object of compassion must be treated with respect. Even if it is a small earthworm, it is the same creation of nature that this world needs. Without due respect and understanding, compassion turns into pity and humiliates the one to whom this feeling is manifested.

Patience

When you do things, it happens that they are not appreciated. Patience in this case will be an indicator of sincerity.

Showing compassion and empathy

Let's look at a few examples of how compassion is shown. Let's start with the most common one.

worldly charity

For famous, rich people, charity is now in vogue. I have nothing against this fashion, quite the contrary, perhaps it is the best of all existing ones and I support it. Only such good deeds done from selfish motives (the pursuit of fashion trends, the desire to look better in the eyes of others, fame, recognition) cannot be called sincere compassion. It cannot purify the soul and fill it with light.

Very rare individuals do not flaunt their good deeds. If a person is driven by such selfish motives, then let's say if they are not justified, if they are not glorified properly, then it is incomprehensible that he would have committed such a charitable act.

True compassion

True compassion comes from the depths of the heart, it inspires a person to do good deeds without demanding anything in return.

W.B.3.3.21

tikshavah karunikah

suhrdah sarva-dehinam

ajata-satravah santah

sadhavah sadhu-bhusanah

Sadhu is patient and merciful, he is the friend of all living beings. He has no enemies, he is peaceful, strictly follows the injunctions of the shastras and is endowed with all the virtues.

A sadhu is a deeply spiritual person who has dedicated his life to God and strives to give knowledge to others. And all the qualities of compassion, according to this verse, are fully manifested in him.

He is patient and merciful. He develops friendship for all living beings, which means that he is equally merciful to people and animals. Every living being in this world has the right to life. Such a person does not harbor enmity towards anyone, even if someone is hostile to him. When doing good deeds, the sadhu is patient, because often people do not appreciate his deeds. The true task of such a person is to save the souls of others, and not just the body. As one of the proverbs says: "What's the point in saving the clothes of a drowning man, if you need to save him himself."

Therefore, real compassion can only be fully enjoyed by highly spiritual personalities who are willing to sacrifice everything in order to give true knowledge and happiness to others. To bring other people closer to God, to give them the opportunity for spiritual progress.

It happens that a person wants to show his compassion, but as soon as his comfort zone is touched, all good intentions disappear. The conclusion in such a situation is obvious.

Video - a story from the ancient Vedic scriptures about compassion

Compassion for children and animals

Many people find it much easier to feel compassion for children and animals because their souls are pure and innocent. Unfortunately, it is impossible to help all the sick and homeless, but still a lot is in our power.

For example, you can refuse to eat meat, in this way you will show mercy and save a few innocent animals. One social organization calculated how much a person eats meat in his life: more than 1,000 chickens, a dozen pigs and cows. I became 12 years ago, thereby saving more than a hundred animals.

Compassion for other people

Many people have problems with compassion and empathy for their own kind. A projection comes to the fore, and unpleasant thoughts and arguments come into my head: “Why should I help someone, I have enough problems myself,” etc.

A fair summary of this story - a well-fed hungry does not understand.

How to Develop and Form Compassion

To begin with, I will try to explain why you need to form compassion in yourself.

Compassion makes our heart wider, and selfishness, on the contrary, narrows it.

When we have a “big” heart, then we have good relationships with others, we feel healthy and complete. And gradually our consciousness approaches God

As a result of selfishness, the heart narrows, illnesses and misfortunes come.

Our modern civilization ties a knot in the heart, for anyone if you look at all the tortured and unfortunate.

People without this quality manifest callousness and cruelty. Sincere feelings cannot enter into such a soul - neither joy nor love. When we empathize with others, our soul is cleansed and becomes more receptive to the world and spiritual knowledge.

As I have already said, it is easier to sympathize with someone else's grief when you have experienced a similar unpleasant event in your own skin.

The main key to developing compassion lies in spiritual self-improvement.

One of the barriers to compassion is self-centeredness. People are too fixated on their "I" and thoughts about their own good. At least once a day, try to practice empathy. Look at some person and ask yourself the question “What would I feel in his place?” It is best to do this during a conflict situation, thus you will complete 3 missions at once:

1. get distracted from your own negative feelings;
2. practice empathy;
3. soften the conflict.

The difference between pity and compassion

Now I will tell you the difference between pity and true compassion. There is a significant difference between these concepts. Pity is a destructive and destructive feeling, and compassion is bright and creative. Pity is inaction, but compassion provides help. Pity comes from the mind, and compassion from the heart.

Let's analyze this statement with an example. Imagine a seriously ill person. Relatives are sitting next to him, crying and pitying him. They already doom the patient and give him an inner message that he will not be able to cope with difficulties. Thus, they drive a person into an even greater abyss of misfortune, and he drops his hands.

Compassion carries creative energy and good spirits. A person who truly manifests this quality will not be inactive, he will provide all kinds of assistance and look for the best ways out of the situation. Vibrations filled with light and love come from such people, which in themselves have a beneficial effect on others and give them the strength to overcome difficulties.

Education of human qualities in oneself is an important stage in the formation of personality. It is on them that our behavior depends. To a certain extent, everyone is influenced by culture and society, but ultimately moral and everyone determines for himself. So what is empathy, and should we cultivate it in ourselves?

The explanatory dictionary defines sympathy as an opportunity to understand someone else's situation, to be imbued with someone else's grief, to put oneself in the place of another person. It is important not only to understand but also to share them. Most often, the beginnings of this condition is in every person. Who does not evoke sad feelings at the sight of abandoned children or old women begging for alms? But the state of a person is not always obvious. Often people who are depressed do not show their condition in any way. Therefore, it is important to develop empathy and sensitivity in yourself.

How to show empathy? There is no single pattern here. You just need to hug someone, say an encouraging word to someone. Others Need The first step you need to take is to listen to the person. Sometimes even that can help a lot. Ask questions. So the interlocutor will understand that he is not indifferent to you. Develop observation in yourself. Empathy and compassion go hand in hand, so it is important to be able to notice someone else's depression in time. Don't be afraid to appear cheeky. The last thing to do is put yourself in the other person's shoes. This is the most difficult stage. A common mistake they make is to start judging. It doesn't lead to anything good. After all, what is empathy? This is the ability to share someone else's grief. The key point is "share". And do not give any assessment of what is happening. To better understand the problems of other people, you need to read

It is not enough to know, you must be able to manifest it. To do this, it is important to develop this quality. Talk more often with children, with friends. Carefully observe the people around you, note their condition. Put yourself in their shoes every time. This will allow you to develop tolerance for other people's actions. Empathy is also important. It is the ability to feel the emotions of others. This is difficult to learn, but possible. After that, you will not need to know what empathy is, you will show it without difficulty.

In addition to developing compassion in yourself, it is important

Instill in children. Without it, they will become cruel and selfish. Do not forget that they take an example from their parents. If they are polite to each other, show love, then children easily adopt this. If the situation is reversed, then nothing good can be expected. It is important to talk to them about reading books together and the like. Remember that the older the child, the more difficult it is to re-educate him.

Empathy is also an important quality for psychologists. In their daily work, they face a large number of human problems and their task is not only to help, but also to share the grief. Notably, men are more compassionate than women. It is their biological role to help weaker people. But in the end, each person chooses how to behave.

Instruction

A very common reason for the lack of empathy is not the inability to feel it, but the unwillingness to look at others. Psychologists always point out that couples who have serious problems do not sympathize with each other. In this case, the partner is often perceived from a selfish position. Each partner wants the other to pay attention to him first, to do what is “necessary”. But the one who shows attention first will always win. Of course, attention should be genuine and disinterested, and not based on a response.

Empathy is the understanding of what exactly is lacking in another person. Sometimes it is enough to look at others to understand what they need. This allows you to deeply understand the needs of others, soften any relationship. Empathy is especially needed by those who receive it the least: children and the elderly. Empathy is the basis for building deep and trusting relationships with both the child and the parents.

The problem for showing empathy is often fear of pain or selfishness. Try to deal with it. If you feel that someone from those around you who depend on you needs help, then you will have to provide it, even forgetting about your own goals that previously seemed a priority. For example, if you are a business person, then, having sympathized with your wife, who is waiting for you in the evenings from work, you will try to come home early, although before that such a requirement seemed absurd.

Sometimes a person is accused of a lack of empathy, not because he really does not understand others, but because he does not express his feelings. You can feel for someone, but if you don't talk about it, then some people will sometimes consider you heartless. Especially often this is faced by people who are not used to talking about their feelings. Try to be more open with loved ones. If you feel something - say it, such a policy will allow you to establish trusting relationships and get rid of the accusations that you do not know how to sympathize.

It's hard to sympathize with something you don't understand. For example, some young and inexperienced people have great difficulty empathizing with the elderly. It is not in vain that they say that "the well-fed does not understand the hungry." If you encounter someone's life experience that is very different from yours, try to put yourself in that person's shoes. Do not judge harshly, even if someone has made what seems to you an unforgivable mistake. In general, it is better not to judge anyone. You don't know what you would do if you were in a similar situation. When it is harder for someone than you, and you understand this difference, feel the pain of this person - this is called sympathy.

Empathy is not only the ability to understand what other people are experiencing. It is also the ability to be attentive, treat others with tact and courtesy. Try to help people. Make it a habit for yourself to do a good deed, like once a week. The feelings that come over you when you help someone will not only help you learn empathy, but also become a more kind and merciful person.