Each of us faces rudeness every day. In shops, in transport, on the street, in hospitals - everywhere there are people who can spoil the mood for the whole day.

offend and anyone can ruin a person's mood, especially born rude ones. On the them antics need to be properly responded to. To it needs to be prepared and know what to answer in order to save yourself nerves and deserve to get out the situation.

Of course, there are situations when the answer to not worth the insult

• on the insulting strangers in shop, transport or other public place worth paying attention to. It is unlikely that anyone but the police will be able to calm them down;
• not worth answering the rudeness of strangers if they provoke a fight. True, if someone wants to fight, they won’t just let you go, but if there is a chance to avoid a fight, use it;
• on the rudeness can be bumped into the Internet on different forums or in the comments. provoking people to I bet a lot of people do this to make money or just play their egos. On the rudeness in social networks are not costs answer to save time and nerves.

When we still have to answer, we upset that we don't managed to properly fight back, and even if it seemed that you you answer with dignity, after the fact phrases come up that fit better would. Not to upset yourself, you can learn in advance to respond to the offender.

What a funny answer insult

Many people make the mistake of insults are responded with rudeness. Of course, when we are offended, it's annoying, but if you gather your strength and do not honor the boor with attention, you will definitely win the argument. Howsoever it was difficult, make it clear that you are indifferent to the words of a person who is rude. The best option- respond to rudeness with humor.

If you are in stock will be witty phrases, then you you can get out of any situation.

Immediately forget about the drums hung around the neck of the offenders so that they lead the column going somewhere. This is an unconstructive reaction, albeit with a share of sarcasm. In response to an insult, it is better to use intellectual humor to show your superiority over a rude person:

• "FROM I ask for more details at this moment...”;
• "Like you beautifully turn out to come up with nasty things ”;
• "I see you all night they were preparing a speech”;
• “Maybe we should call an ambulance? You must be feeling bad, since you started talking such nonsense”;
• “I want to thank your parents for raising such a good person”;
• “Thank God, you are talking nonsense again! And I already thought that you are a smart person.

If the offender is not understands humor and continues to speak badly in your side, try to correctly explain to the person in clever words that he behaves in a rude way. On the smart phrases rude can not find the right answer and will simply leave you. Do not shout and swear - polite enough intelligently explain that someone wrong. Such composure will knock the boor out of the rut.

How to get out with dignity such situations? There is a wise way. agree with rude words and thank you for what he found your shortcomings. This method is very efficient- you don’t be rude in response, but you put the boor in awkward position. Ill-mannered people need to be made to understand that they are behaving ugly. On the tactful remark they will react and think about it.

If someone pedals your appearance (blonde, bespectacled, fat), bring this feature to the fore and thank the interlocutor for being observant. “Yes, I'm blonde, we've been talking for an hour, and you just noticed! For a long time it comes to you! ”,“ Do I need to remind you that glasses have always been considered a sign of intelligence. That's why I see that your glasses do not shine.

Best answers for insults

Not on all insults can be answered with one memorized phrase. If ham with seemingly illiterate, then clever maxims will come in handy. Beautiful and correct answers to rudeness:

• "Not want to get away from such an interesting conversation, but I'm in a hurry";
• "How to answer you so as not to offend";
• “No, what are you, I always yawn when I am interested in a conversation with an interlocutor”;
• "You you know, my friend is conducting an experiment on studying primate intelligence, you just need to get involved.”

To be ready for any insults, you need to know what a provocateur might look like. Ham's face:

• more often these are weak personalities who try to defend themselves with their insults;
• brutes are energy vampires who enjoy getting people out of myself;
• Aggressive people who love to argue. This is Y they become a habit;
• stupid people.

How to speak smartly answer to rudeness

To be ready to answer insults, learn a few smart phrases that might come in handy. True, keep in mind that some smart words are not enough. You need to show the offender that you- self-confident person it's hard to get you out myself. Therefore, all words should be pronounced clearly, in a calm tone.

Examples of phrases that can be used in response to abuse:

• "Not it's worth being so angry, and then your eyes will now take on the color of your red blouse”;
• "If a fools would fly, you b not here now stood";
• "Not know your preferences food, but products that you use in food, clearly reduce intelligence”;
• "It's easy for you to surprise me just say something smart”;
• “You must have been hugged a little in childhood, so you so evil. Let me I'll hug you..."

Costs whether to answer at all insults

Should I answer insults, you decide you. Keep in mind that the reciprocal insult in the address of loved ones can lead to that the relationship will be ruined. Therefore, in order not to allow a scandal, try, on the contrary, to defuse the situation.

Do not forget that rude people are usually people offended by fate who are simply unable to argue their opinion. Therefore, do not be rude yourself and do not respond to the antics of strangers.

And one moment. When an insult touches you, you decide how to respond to it. But if someone is rude to people close to you - offends a girl, mother, laughs at a brother or sister - a reaction is already needed here. Again: no need to get involved in a fight, it’s enough just to show that you are intellectually superior to the interlocutor, and that the one at whom the rudeness was directed has a patron.

What to say in answer to rudeness of strangers

If you were rude to a stranger and you decide whatever began to fight back, use the repetition method. On the answer the words of a rude person with phrases: “What are you doing!", "AND what's next?", "Everything? And now everything? So you quickly get rid of unpleasant person.

Use the surprise method: when insulted, sneeze and say that you are allergic to rudeness. BUT in general, when strangers begin to be rude, find out the reason for such behavior. If his insults are unfounded, let him know and that they are unpleasant to you. In rare cases, of course, the offender is right, and the remarks hit the mark. In such cases, you will have to agree with the speaker, but reproach him for pointing out your shortcomings so rudely.

AT in most cases the person is not ready to that he might be offended. Not know what to answer? Just improvise. Be calm, don't it's worth going near the emotions on about. Before you say anything, think about what answer to tell the interlocutor. When you learn to control your thoughts and emotions, you roll out easily any situation.

Rudeness, vulgarity, swearing, insults and other impartial things are a widespread and depressing phenomenon, an ineradicable evil in the modern world.

While most people strive to be polite, tactful, and courteous to each other, there are times in life when when you just can't get away from rudeness. The correct response to aggression from the outside can help not only to curb the rude person, but also to maintain one's own self-esteem. Let's try to answer the question - how to respond to an insult funny and sarcastic?

Rudeness and rudeness are common for a number of different reasons, ranging from the banal bad mood and ending with a whole list of personality traits. Basically, people are impudent and rude to others because:

• Do not experience satisfaction from life;
• They have an inferiority complex, groundless arrogance and egocentrism;
• Have a low level of culture and education;
• They want to provoke someone to exchange insults due to their aggressive nature.

Unhappy, embittered, squeezed, but at the same time ambitious and conceited people are the main generators of rudeness in society. Deliberate neglect of others, the conflicting nature of character, primitive consciousness - all this can seriously ruin the life of balanced and well-mannered people.
How to respond to insults?

Let's say the rude still does not let up and continues to bring his "opponent" out of balance. It is by no means possible to stoop to his level and start a response tirade full of sophisticated insults. How, then, to besiege the lover of insults?

Important! Rude - always weak and insecure person who is very afraid of being worse than others. This is an axiom that should always be kept in mind in the event of a verbal conflict.

Ignoring

Silence is not only gold, but also the most popular way to deal with rudeness.

Defiantly ignoring various impudent "cattle" can be effective only in the case of absolute equanimity.

No touchy looks, tired sighs and similar reactions! For successfully ignoring insults it is necessary to show the rude that he is an empty place.

calmness

If the previous tactic did not have the desired effect, and the flow of insults continues to spoil the mood of others, then during the “conversation” with rude people, you should try to maintain self-control and not show your confusion.

A frank and firm position expressed calm and confident tone, often acts on the "bazaar boor" like cold water. Being energy vampires at their core, brawlers draw inspiration from weak, pliable and nervous people. Icy calm drives the rude into a stupor, because he expects the opposite reaction.

You to me, I to you

You can use the method of transferring the negativity of the interlocutor to him. Whatever he says, full agreement with his remarks and gratitude for identifying “flaws” will put the rude out of action. After all, he is waiting for a sharp disagreement with his attacks, how can this be ?!

However, calm phrases like "thanks for the valuable advice", "I'll take note" and other similar options can silence the source of insults. This method works best in public, because a rude person is unlikely to receive any support from outside, and may even be ridiculed.

Sneeze

If ignoring did not help, and the boor continues to pour insulting remarks, you can let him do this until he believes that he is right.

And then sneeze, pause, and say, "Sorry, I'm allergic to that kind of nonsense."

Similar replica will cause confusion, and can reduce the flow of insults to nothing.

What to do if a loved one or colleague is being rude?

A stranger who decides to assert himself with the help of insults at someone else's expense does not deserve attention and deserves only to be ignored. But in the case of people who make up a permanent social circle, this method will not work. Therefore, with rudeness coming from relatives and friends, it is necessary to immediately deal with and clarify all uncomfortable topics.

Another thing is people who, by the will of fate, are colleagues (classmates, fellow students, regular visitors to any institutions).

Important! Gently avoiding the exchange of insults is the first step that almost every sane person takes.

If silent ignorance only provokes a rude person, then you can imagine him as a capricious little child, attracting attention to himself with various boorish phrases. After all, no one will take seriously, albeit rude, but not aware of his behavior, the baby?

Thus, ignoring will help not only to gain protection from all kinds of insults, but also to improve your own mood. Moreover, the rude one way or another will notice the displayed stamina, which in the future may have a positive effect on his behavior.

And yet silent ignoring does not always lead to successful settlement of the conflict. sometimes worth it pluck up courage and fend off the brute. For this, the phrases “Who allowed you to talk to people like that?”, And also “You will talk in such a tone with your wife / husband” will do quite well. Most often, such remarks are enough to indicate to the rude man who is who.

When is the best time to ignore insults?

Rendering resistance to rude people is sometimes a deliberately meaningless exercise.

Provocations on the streets, in shops and other public places are best simply ignored.

In principle, a person cannot be liked by everyone, therefore the most advantageous move in such a situation is demonstrative ignoring.

In addition, there is a risk of meeting unstable and inadequate rude people. When they exhaust their meager vocabulary, they can easily go from simple insults to physical violence. In order not to suffer in a fight, it is best not to enter into any conversations with such rude people and to retire with dignity from the “battlefield”.
How to respond to insults?

Respond nicely to insults

Polite communication discourages rude people, because they do not expect such an unusual reaction. For example, the phrase "Dear, I'm not going to talk to you in that tone" or "Dear, you probably confused me with someone else" can cool the boorish ardor.

Other similar remarks demonstrating good manners and education: "Rudeness does not paint you", "Thank you for showing interest in me", "Don't be upset, you will still succeed."

If this does not work, it is best to say goodbye to the "interlocutor" and leave.

Smart responses to insults

You can ask leading questions that a rude person probably won't be able to answer. Best variants of similar phrases: “Why do you want to hurt me?”, “What do you really want from me?”, “Which answer will suit you, polite or truthful?” etc.

witty answers

The owners of a sharp mind can build a good line of conduct with ill-mannered people.

Responding to criticism with various funny remarks, you can not only beautifully put a person in his place, but also cause general laughter under certain circumstances.

They do this job well following remarks: “Didn’t you scare Babayka as a child?”, “I’m not interested in what you think of me, but I’m glad that you know how to think”, “Go, vacuum the desert!”, “My main drawback is the inability to communicate with rude people "," Do I look like a dentist? Then please shut your mouth."

Shyness and shyness are real food for quarrelsome and scandalous personalities, and ignoring them cannot always improve the situation. It is worth remembering this and at the right moments to overcome yourself, giving a worthy rebuff to various manifestations of human baseness.

10.09.2013

22079

We all have to deal with rudeness, insults and rudeness from time to time. And those of us who do not know how to properly respond to insults have to endure resentment, get angry and accumulate depression in ourselves. Many, not knowing how to adequately respond to an insult with their rash words, deeds and actions, provoke serious conflicts and, neglecting common sense, enter into “internecine wars”.

It happens that a person, not knowing how to respond to an insult, uses his fists, sometimes even in cases where the situation does not require even the slightest reaction. The inability to answer the offender with a word, the inability to find the right words in order to put the bully in his place is the cause of bad mood, stress, health problems, suicides, fights and even murders. You say I'm over-dramatizing the situation? But it really is!

In order to learn how to respond to insults, it’s not enough just to memorize beautiful phrases and expressions, you need to understand what an insult is, what are its motives in each specific case, learn how to respond (it’s not about what to answer, but about a psychological reaction to rudeness, humiliation and criticism), and of course it is wise, worthy and beautiful to respond to these barbs.

So what is an insult? Insult is a deliberate infliction of insult, humiliation of the honor and dignity of a person, often expressed in a rude and indecent form. In addition, as verbally, an insult can be inflicted in writing or in the form of actions (obscene gesture, push, spit, slap, etc.), openly or in the absence of a person.

Insult is always a negative assessment given to the behavior and qualities of a person, in a form that contradicts socially accepted rules of conduct, morality and ethics. In most countries, insult is a crime, for which, according to the idea, an inevitable punishment should always follow (in Russia, after Article 130 of the Criminal Code has become invalid, insult is an administrative offense, and liability for it is provided for by Article 5.61 of the Code of Administrative Offenses). However, in this article we will omit the moment of such a reaction as the defense of honor and dignity in court, and we will try to figure out how to react and respond to insults on our own.

Today, there are many different psychological techniques that can help you adequately respond to an insult. However, each of them is based on the initial understanding of the intentions and goals of the offender, inflicting "poisonous injections." Therefore, in order to competently parry the insult and put the presumptuous interlocutor in his place, you first need to realize the hidden motives of the opponent and take care of the antidote.

How to respond to insults and accusations

You have been scolded by accident or on purpose. For business? Hurt? Remember that any feeling or emotion, including insult (resentment combined with a feeling of strong humiliation) arises inside a person. Therefore, we cannot be offended, we can only be offended.

First of all, do not take the insult literally and take every word personally. If your offender has a bad mood or is poorly educated, this does not mean that you are to blame.

In order for a person to learn how to properly respond to insults, it is important to know that the one who splutters and behaves inappropriately, throwing insults to the right and left, is himself a victim. A victim of his eccentric nature. Usually, people who attack others and humiliate them are weak. They are unable to cope with negative emotions and therefore splash them out on others. As a rule, someone offended them too, and, unable to cope with the bitterness that overwhelms them, they “merge” it in this way (often people offend and are rude out of a sense of envy). So is there any point in being offended by a toadstool?

How to respond to an insult if the offender is your loved one? If you value relationships, then you should talk and dot the Y. Calmly and openly tell him that his words hurt you deeply (namely, the words of loved ones hurt us the most, even when we seem to have learned to calmly respond to insults from strangers, unfamiliar or just acquaintances). Discuss the situation and you will feel better.

The most preferred response to insults from a stranger is ignoring. Simply do not notice the rude person (of course, if the situation does not require the opposite behavior), imagine that he is not around, and the opinion and words of a stranger are an empty phrase. If you are not in the category of people wanting to please everyone then it will be easy for you.

If you are offended by a work colleague or boss, remember that a careful avoidance of the conflict will always be beneficial. The words of a colleague who still cannot calm down and on whom your silence does not work can be answered with some neutral taunt. And with the boss jokes are bad. Therefore, it is better to listen to the opinion of psychologists who advise in this situation not to conflict and not to respond to insults, but to present your leader as a capricious little child who whimpers and fights all the time. Mentally patting his head, calm him down. Feed with semolina and sit on the pot. Those who have tried this method say that the effect is amazing. Not only does it make you smile and endure offensive remarks with ease, it will also give you inner strength that your boss will definitely notice.

Workout calm reaction to insults will bring you only dividends, namely positive mood, increase in working capacity, stability and balance. By learning to respond to aggressive attacks with serene calmness (it can be expressed both in words and deeds, and in silence), you can disarm the offender every time and make him think about whether it is worth behaving like this with you.

How to correctly respond to an insult, given the type of criticism

Before responding to an insult, quickly analyze what was said, and if it looks more like constructive criticism (the insult, in fact, has nothing to do with what we are), immediately admit that you are wrong, start with “Yes”: “ Yes, you are absolutely right." If you doubt the reasons for the attacks and do not know how to respond to a barb and a remark addressed to you, ask a clarifying question. For example, if the matter does not concern your real omissions or blunders, and the angry tirade uttered by your opponent is intended to belittle and insult you, then the phrase - “Do you have a specific proposal?” Will confuse him. An adequate person, even in the case of a harsh statement, will justify his opinion and offer other options.

If you agree with, albeit with unpleasant, but fair criticism, do not apologize unless absolutely necessary. Just agree, constantly apologizing people look not self-confident.

In the event that an insult or accusation is only partly true, acknowledge it in part. For example, they tell you that you are always late (this hardly looks like an insult, but if it is said in a rude and aggressive form, and even in public, someone may consider it as such). A decent response would be something like, "Yes, I'm late today." Or here's another example: "You are an illiterate specialist and constantly make spelling mistakes." A worthy response to an insult would be the phrase: “Yes, There are two spelling errors in this report».

A completely unfair insult can be answered with a counter-question, asked on the merits of rudeness. They can be of several types:

• Clarifying questions such as: “Why do you think so?”, “What exactly do you mean?”, “Why are you personally interested in this?”, “What did you mean by this?” etc., rarely, but they give a result. If a person begins to answer them, he will imperceptibly drive himself into a dead end. However, you should not count on this (although you can try), after clarifying questions, the offender, as a rule, does not calm down (he also uses an unfair type of criticism without substantiating his rudeness) and answers something like: “Don’t you yourself guess?” or "I mean, you're a slacker and untalented." It is worth being patient, of course, if you want to respond to the insult culturally, and continue to calmly ask further.
• Factual questions are a call to voice the facts and give examples: “Names, appearances, passwords?”, “Please name the facts”, “Give an example”, etc. If your detractor answers these questions with general phrases: “There are many examples and facts ...”, “You yourself understand everything perfectly ...”, etc., continue to “torture” him further or stop the dialogue with the phrase, they say, you don't really have anything to say.
• Alternative questions will help the offender formulate specific claims and say what he is really unhappy with: “Maybe you are not satisfied with my lack of punctuality or the way I dress and look? Maybe you don't like how I communicate with customers or how I make reports? Here, perhaps, you will hear a specific answer, unless of course the opponent really has something to present to you. If yes, then proceed as described above.
• Devastating questions: “You are not satisfied with the way I make reports, the way I look, the way I communicate. What else doesn’t suit you in me? ”- they are asked so that your critic or the person insulting you expresses everything and does not touch you for as long as possible.

It is likely that leading questions that you ask in a calm tone will cause amazement and even indignation in the critic. This is normal and means that he feels your advantage in this situation. He is used to being justified or submissively silent in front of him, and you kindly try to figure everything out and take into account specific and objective comments as soon as they are voiced.

How to respond to insults: general rules

The first thing to be learned by a person who does not know how to respond to an insult- this is that in no case should one stoop to mutual insulting accusations and thoughtless reactions. Firstly, from the outside it looks very stupid and funny. Secondly, maybe you are falling for some manipulative influence. So why start playing by someone else's rules, with the possibility of being caught in cleverly placed nets.

In most cases, it is better to respond to insults not only politely and civilly, but at least calmly and with dignity. In some situations (for example, in the case of trolling), the best answer is to completely ignore the offender.

If you are a calm and well-mannered person by nature, then cultural response to insult a born boor is quite difficult and most often meaningless. You are obviously a loser, because you start playing on someone else's court and by someone else's rules. You must stay in your field. If you can calmly and reasonably answer, then answer, but another problem is that the boor's receptors that perceive your arguments do not work. So it's best to turn around and leave. This is the easiest way to respond to an insult.

Often responding to criticism, people make a mistake - they begin to make excuses: no, I'm not like that, you are unfair to me, I'm not to blame ... Excuses put you in the position of a humiliated one - this is, firstly. Secondly, they are not interesting and not needed, as a rule, they are not even listened to. Agree, it’s stupid to make excuses to a person for whom to say some kind of taunt or insult - a desire to play on emotions, a way of self-affirmation (in this situation, you can ask - “Well, did you assert yourself at my expense?”) Or a desire to stand out. Therefore, when listening to insults, always try to understand why they want to insult you.

Difficult days happen to everyone, and perhaps a rude remark broke from the lips of your interlocutor by accident. In this case, the question is "Bad day?" will be sufficient. A normal person will agree and apologize for being harsh. However, asking such a question to a “troll” is not the best way to respond to an insult, as this can cause a whole stream of hard-hitting expressions from his side in your direction.

Sometimes it is not necessary to respond to an insult, it is enough just to ask the person in a non-aggressive or even friendly way about what he said. Pretend that you did not hear or, in thought, simply did not pay attention to his statement. Only frank Hamlo will repeat the insult.

If you still decide to answer the offender, and it doesn’t matter whether the situation requires it or you just feel like it, you should not rush at the enemy with objections directly. Be cool, silence accusations and insults with well-aimed and witty answers, but only after you have fully listened to all the attacks addressed to you. Firstly, you will have time to think and find a sharp word, and secondly, you will be able to moderate your ardor and maintain sobriety of thought. And if this is a situation where your detractor is acting on emotions (i.e. this is not a planned and carefully thought out attack), you can give him the opportunity to discredit himself to the fullest.

Some attacks can be answered with humor. When an insult seems to be not an insult at all, but just a harmless mockery, or when you need to answer and defuse the situation without spoiling the relationship, the joke is quite appropriate. This approach has another plus. It will save you from further insults and attacks from a person who enjoys seeing his victim feel anger or some other negative emotion. After all, if you react to his attacks with a smile, therefore, you don’t care, and you don’t even think to get angry, offended or swear. Humor will take away the rude man, putting him into a stupor. And he's like energetic vampire going in search of a new victim.

Do not joke if the insults are serious, hurting your honor and dignity. Otherwise, both the offender and those around you will decide that you can safely “wipe your feet” about you.

How to learn to respond to insults and not provoke new ones

It will help you to get out of any verbal duel as a winner and put in place a presumptuous interlocutor ability to express thoughts quickly. In order to learn how to respond to insults witty and most importantly on time, do not hesitate to arrange comic duels with acquaintances, friends or work colleagues. Remember that in each fight you gain the necessary experience and skill.

There are people who are rude more often than others. There is such a thing - the psychology of the victim. Sacrificial people who are easy to offend (he has such an appearance, he behaves this way, it can be seen from him that he will not be able to respond to an insult) - he will always find his boor. Here you need to ask yourself the question: “Why do people talk to me like that? Maybe the problem is in me if this is repeated periodically?

Often people are not able to somehow respond to an insult because of their own insecurity, low self-esteem or natural shyness. Having heard unpleasant words addressed to them, they, overwhelmed by fear, cannot utter a word. Here we need an integrated approach - having started the fight against these qualities, constantly practice the ability to correctly respond to insults. And remember, the reaction to rudeness and boorish behavior must come from the depth of inner steadfastness.

In addition, fear transmitted through some absolutely unthinkable channels can spur the offender to more and more rudeness. So in any conflict situation, including responding to insults, you must, first of all, curb your fear. We are so arranged that, not knowing how to defend ourselves from insult, we involuntarily begin to breathe deeper, strain our eyes, clench our fists or cross our legs and arms. Try to follow your emotions in such situations, and consciously control your external manifestations.

How to intelligently respond to an insult: examples, situations, phrases

When insulting, people often use formulaic expressions. So to know how to properly respond to an insult, you can make a list of frequently observed rudeness and come up with adequate responses to them.

To make it more clear to you in which direction to move, I suggest that you familiarize yourself with typical insults and possible options for a decent reaction. Perhaps my answers were not original enough, I'm sure you can come up with a better one.

If an ill-wisher with a false note in his voice notices that you look bad because of yesterday's feast, thank him for his indifference, and in turn show concern for the offender's appearance: “It's strange, you seem to have been at home all evening yesterday (a) , but you still look crumpled. Look at the bruises under your eyes." Well, or say that you forgot to look in the mirror as you were in a hurry to get to work, and then, after taking a cursory glance at the insolent person, happily add: “Oh, I see, you don’t like to look in the mirror either.”

You can respond to an insult by translating the negative qualities that are attributed to you into virtues. - "You are verbose and talkative." - "Just me sociable person».

If you are insulted and accused, you can remind the person of the expression: “We are what we think about” or the well-known saying “Whoever hurts, he talks about it”, well, or say “Do not judge by yourself”. The point is this: we often suspect others of what we ourselves are capable of, and we need to explain to the person that with his insults he characterizes himself rather than you.

You can turn the reproach in the opposite direction and ask the aggressor how he managed to achieve such outstanding results, master skills that you do not possess, acquire such wonderful character traits (this can be done in a caustic or serious form):

• - "You're crooked!" “How do you manage to keep your hands straight?”
• - "You first day at work, but have already shown themselves as a worthless clumsy. “Share your experience. How do you manage to stay calm in stressful situations?

How to respond intelligently to an insult about your clothes:

• - "Are you dressing in the Chinese market?" “It doesn’t matter what I’m wearing, on my figure even beggarly rags will look like a chic dress.

If the offender, wanting to belittle the value of what you did, says that you used bad means in your work, the wrong tools or methods, you can say that, despite the originality of the means used in the work, it was done beyond praise and the result speaks for itself. myself.

Try wisely respond to an insult, which sounded to you in a bar, restaurant or store is not worth it (unless in order to hone your skill in sharp and quick attacks). The correct reaction would be to call the administrator or ask for a complaint book. A few such complaints and a rude employee will be fired.

If you have to listen to insults from some official, then you just need to ask very politely to tell you his position, as well as his full name. Those who use this technique to cool the ardor of a negligent employee know that it works very well. One gets the feeling that at that moment a tub of cold water was poured on him.

You can respond to an insult like a luminous Buddha - with a radiant smile and wishing the offender all the brightest. Of course, such a reaction is not always appropriate and not suitable for everyone, because each case of insult is individual and people are different, so there can be no universal answers. Choose the tactics of behavior that suits you best. Try, experiment, but do it wisely.

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UralAchural

Vyacheslav

Catherine

Katerina

There are many aggressive people in modern society, because the frantic pace of life leaves its mark on mood, behavior and interpersonal communication. At a certain period of life, people collide with each other, so avoiding conflicts is quite difficult. Sooner or later you will find yourself in the line of fire with a person who throws insults. At such moments, you must fight back against your opponent. Some start a skirmish, others react calmly. Consider all the methods in order.

Method number 1. boredom

1. The technique of tediousness is quite common among intelligent people. If you are mentally superior to your opponents, consider this option. If the interlocutor is trying to offend you, give him an analogy from the scientific literature.
2. For example, you were reproached for the mess on your desktop, as if you had evolved from a pig. Get your bearings in time and answer: “Darwin has repeatedly proved the fact that pigs do not belong to humans in any way. They do not work at a desk, therefore, they cannot create a mess in the workplace. Read the book to make more precise arguments in the future!
3. In addition to the fact that the fact will hurt the offender, the opponent will be confused. You will have enough time to plan further dialogue. Not many people have scientific knowledge, such a move will put the boor in an awkward position.

Method number 2. Ignoring

1. Not every person can gather his will into a fist and turn on the ignoring mode, besides, such behavior is not always appropriate. However, there are often cases when this tactic will come in handy.
2. If the insult is petty, a grin is the best option. Smile with one corner of your lips, thinking to yourself how much better the world would be without fools. If a person is narrow-minded, and also sinks to low insults, demonstrate contempt.
3. Don't hold back your positive attitude. You can laugh in your opponent's face without responding with words. Make it clear that rudeness does not hurt you at all, even if the situation is different.
4. The tactic of ignoring is to prove to the opponent his stupidity. It is possible that he will become even more furious when he sees your reaction. Namely, that his words not only do not disturb, but also amuse you.
5. If the person is sane, you can accompany the grin with a polite phrase. For example, “It seemed to me or did you have a bad day?”. If a person belongs to the category of boors, your attack will cause even more discontent.
6. Unfortunately, the modern world is degrading, so it is important to use the ignoring technique correctly. She is suitable for a skirmish with ill-mannered people who do not watch their language.
7. Never try to justify yourself if you see that the insult is inappropriate. Again, it's best to ignore the attacker by smiling slyly in response. Do not cross into the territory of the offender, such a move will be obviously losing.

Method number 3. calmness

1. The previous options, namely "Ignore" and "Nerd", refer to sarcastic ways. You suppress the offender through malice, some kind of mockery. And this method differs in that you need to respond to insults in a calm tone.
2. Do not swear, use swear words or raise your voice a few tones. Answer with a slight smile, be friendly. Ask what exactly does not suit your interlocutor. Try to sort out the situation "on the shelves."
3. Such behavior shocks the opponent, some begin to feel embarrassed. A conflict situation often ends with an apology from the offender. This option will not allow the scandal to turn into a disaster.
4. If you have peace of mind and want to maintain harmony in your heart, do not respond with evil to an insult. When this is hard to achieve, take 5 deep breaths and the same number of exhalations, and then proceed to further dialogue.

Method number 4. Gratitude

1. The technique of gratitude is also called Aikido. Of course, experienced professionals do not advise to engage in assault. The technique consists in transferring aggression from the opponent to him.
2. The option is suitable for people who are offended in the presence of colleagues or other large crowds. In such situations, it is important to defend your honor, but it must be done correctly.
3. Tell the interlocutor that you are extremely grateful to him. For what? For the fact that he spent a lot of time listing your shortcomings. Also clarify that you would not do this because you do not care about him.
4. It is important that there is no sarcasm in the answers. The main thing is to be serious and calm, as if you casually paid attention to the offender. By demonstrating fortitude, you will emerge victorious from the skirmish, while saving face.
5. End the speech with another thank you. Inform that in the evening you will think about your own shortcomings and try to correct them in the near future. As practice shows, such an answer misleads boors. In this case, all the "spectators of the show" will take your side, definitely.

Method number 5. Revelation

1. In most cases, insults in the family circle or among close friends can be eliminated in time if you bring your opponent to a frank dialogue. It is important to step over your pride and stop resisting, after proceeding to manipulation.
2. Let your loved one know that you don't like listening to this kind of complaint. Try to find out what they are backed by. If the arguments are truthful enough, listen and draw your own conclusions.
3. If you are in pain, let me know. As a rule, most situations are resolved peacefully. If people are dear to each other, they will be able to find a solution to any problem.
4. If we are talking, again, about relatives or friends, try to forgive the offender in advance. You yourself understand that irritation and indignation do not appear out of nowhere. Since the person is dear to you, try to understand and forgive him.

Method number 6. Humor

1. Positive is everything! The recommendation is especially relevant in cases with poorly educated or close people. A good joke or a positive reaction to an insult will smooth out the rough edges.
2. To defuse the atmosphere, you need to have a sense of humor. When you repel attacks in this way, the interlocutor will become confused. His concentration will be broken as the insults take a different turn.
3. Further development of the scandal will become inappropriate after both laugh at the joke. It is important to reflect the negative in time so that it does not grow into something more.
4. Of course, not all situations need to be taken lightly. For example, if you were insulted on your way to work (in traffic or on public transport), the best option would be to keep your distance. Move away from the offender, making it clear that his company is unpleasant for you.

Win-win phrases

There are many phrases that will help you get out of a conflict situation as a winner. You can remember those that you like, and then apply them for their intended purpose.

1. "I'm sorry, are you done?"
2. “What a pity, I thought you were a man with brains!”
3. “I can say for sure that the image of a boor does not suit you! Although…"
4. “Dear, please slow down. I am not your wife (brother, matchmaker)
5. “By your tone, you can understand that you have confused the shores ...”
6. “By your behavior do you want to achieve the truth or a flattering answer?”
7. “Why would an educated person put their cons on public display?”
8. "Don't worry about me so much..."
9. “By getting personal, are you trying to compensate for your lack of intelligence?”
10. “Thank you for your interest in my person and life in particular. Your call is very important to us…”
11. “Why are you trying to hurt me? Are you an energy vampire?
12. "Beautiful weather, isn't it?"

There are basic techniques that will save face and adequately respond to insults. The most common options are boring, positive, ignoring, calm, gratitude and revelation. You will also need universal phrases that can be used in controversial situations.

Video: how to respond to insults

84 523 0 Hello! In this article, we will talk about how to respond to an insult. When we hear negative statements addressed to us, insults, the first thing that happens is a defensive reaction, we want to snap back and respond with “reciprocity” to the offender. Usually that's what it's supposed to be. The one who offends is trying to throw the other person out of emotional balance. How do you respond appropriately to maintain self-respect? Is it possible to remain unperturbed when they want to humiliate you?

Insult is usually delivered with words, either verbally or in writing. And also it can be expressed in actions (spit, blow, indecent gesture, etc.).

Insults include:

• coarseness;
• rudeness;
• unfounded criticism;
• joking, sarcasm;
• the use of physical force against the will of another person.

How do we feel when we are insulted

• Resentment
• Anger
• Disturbance
• Hatred
• Sadness, despondency
• Despair
• annoyance
• Fear
• Guilt
• Confusion
• Contempt.

A whole host of negative feelings. Each of us is visited by one of them or several at once, when we hear insults addressed to us. And these feelings largely determine what our response will be in this situation. Therefore, their awareness is important in order to learn how to respond correctly to any attacks of others addressed to us.

Why do people insult others

1. Dissatisfaction with one's own life. When a person is unhappy, dissatisfied with his own personality, achievements, his environment, etc., he splashes out his anger on others. They do not even always realize why they offend others (both close people and strangers).
2. Features of temperament, strong excitability. It is not uncommon for people to insult someone or commit a hurtful act towards another person in a fit of anger when they are no longer in control of their emotions. This often happens in a situation of quarrel. When emotions subside and reason returns, many regret what they said or did and ask for forgiveness.
3. Arrogance. There are people who unreasonably believe that some people around them are lower in status. Respectful and friendly communication is not their forte.
4. Self-affirmation at the expense of others. Humiliating others, some feel stronger. Although this is just self-deception. Behind such self-affirmation, as a rule, is self-doubt and an inferiority complex.
5. Lack of culture and education. If the rules of politeness and tolerance were not instilled in childhood, then in adulthood this can result in rudeness and disrespectful attitude towards other people. And the children who grew up mostly on the street were exposed to the adverse influence of the environment and got used to communicate unkindly.
6. Insult for the purpose of provocation. This method is resorted to when they want to piss off a person in order to put him not in the best light in front of others, to drop his reputation. And all this usually happens in front of eyewitnesses.

Analyzing the causes of rudeness, we understand that almost always behind it are self-doubt, many complexes and hidden dissatisfaction with the offender. Such people deserve nothing but pity. After all, they are deeply unhappy. But unfortunately, when we are suddenly confronted with rudeness and insults, we cannot immediately realize this and remain unperturbed. Most often, we react in some way that is familiar to us, far from always effective.

Unsuccessful ways to respond to rudeness and insults

1. Insult in response . This is one of the most common reactions to rudeness, rudeness. Of course, this technique is sometimes justified, and it even happens that you can emerge victorious from the situation. But still, you can’t know for sure at what point your offender will stop and whether he will stop at all. Perhaps his resources will last for a long time, and yours are already running out. So is it worth the risk? Moreover, most likely, an unpleasant aftertaste will remain because they were forced to say all sorts of nasty things.
2. Ingratiation, subordination of the will to the offender . Never allow as an answer to outright rudeness and insult phrases in the style of: “Yes, I agree with you, this is my flaw”, “Sorry for making you nervous with my behavior”, “I don’t like it myself (myself) in myself”, “Okay, I will correct myself” and so on. So you completely lose your face and agree to depend on the one who attacks you. It's better to be quiet for a while. Although with a delay, but a more worthy answer is sure to be found.
3. Use of physical force . Some are so offended by the words or actions of others that they are ready to settle the issue with their fists. But here, you understand, the police are not far away.
4. Try to convince, appeal to the human mind. Behind rudeness, rudeness, there are always some emotions. First, they need to calm down, and only then logic and constructive thinking will return. Therefore, it is useless to immediately try to "reason" the attacker.

These methods fail because:

• They require a lot of energy from us, it is emotionally difficult for us in moments of confrontation with a boor.
• We are dissatisfied with ourselves, because we could not adequately respond to the insult.
• The situation of rudeness haunts us for a long time, we plunge into stress.
• There is a strong desire to take revenge on the offender, we feel hatred for him.
• There is no feeling of inner glee, indicating that we emerged victorious from the situation.
• Over time, it begins to seem that everyone around is rude and asserts itself at the expense of us.

Do not forget that in any interaction with someone, the interlocutor is more influenced not by what we say, but by how we do it and how we look at the same time. When our face turns red with rage, the whole body is tense, the voice is at the limit of its volume - the offender feels a personal victory, ticking that he pissed us off. Or when we withdraw into ourselves, lower our gaze, mumble something quietly and feel that we are about to cry - the boor rejoices again that he managed to suppress us with his pressure.

3 principles that contribute to the successful confrontation of rudeness and insults

1. Respect and love yourself. People around you feel your attitude towards them. It is those who are dissatisfied with their own personality that attract harsh attacks and insults. And when we are in harmony with ourselves, understand and accept ourselves, then it is much more difficult to “drop” us, to piss us off.

Self-respect and self-love create an invisible but tangible defense against rudeness and rudeness. We advise you to read:.

1. Believe in yourself, you have them. With your attitude to successfully overcome conflict situations and inner confidence, you attract positive energy to yourself and strengthen personal resources. You will notice that even outwardly you become more impressive and bolder.
2. Let yourself be. After all, you know a lot. You have those who make you smile. And there are many pleasant moments around that are worth rejoicing. It is important to realize that happiness is in our hands and we must accept it.

Happiness is a process, not some distant goal.

These are the three pillars of your inner harmony and success in relationships with others.

How to respond to rudeness

Task number 1 is to monitor your behavior at the time of the “collision” and learn to at least outwardly demonstrate self-confidence and equanimity when this happens.

1. Ignore rudeness, keep silent. Quite often, this can discourage the opponent. After all, he is counting on the fact that you will be indignant, nervous, enter into an argument with him. And if this does not happen, then his further attacks are meaningless, and the offender can quickly calm down. In addition, you will save your emotions and health. We advise you to read:
   

   Do not think that you look weak at this moment. Feel your inner strength and superiority, and others will feel it.

2. Verbalization of feelings. Rudeness is usually associated with the experience of various negative emotions. Most often, it manifests without mind control. It is important to voice these emotions.
   - a) To direct the offender to realize his feelings, you can say to him: "Are you upset?" or "I understand that this makes you angry".
   b) Express your feelings: "I hate it when you say that". It is important to use the "I-statement" in this case.

Usually this method allows you to reduce the pressure of the rude and slow down his offensive expressions.

1. Ask a Question. If the situation has not yet gotten out of control, and the person has allowed himself a little rudeness, you can ask a question: "Why are you telling me this?" or "Why are you acting like this?" This tactic is effective only in relation to close people and friends.
2. Gather all your inner strength and respond without words with external cues, for example, with the help of a close, strong look into the eyes of the interlocutor for several seconds.
3. If the situation allows, then you can simply stop communicating with the rude person. Phrase example: “I find such communication unpleasant, and I am forced to this moment stop it!" Say it emphatically and leave or hang up if the conversation was on the phone. Often the offender cools down after such words, apologizes and asks to continue the conversation.

How to respond to insults

The responses listed above will also be appropriate in situations where you are offended. Here are some more options for effective answers.

1. Feel sorry for the offender. As we have already found out, those who insult others are unhappy people, dissatisfied with themselves in the first place. If the interlocutor speaks negatively towards you, mentally pity him and feel how aggression and anger towards him decrease. After all, why get annoyed when he is so miserable and unhappy? You don't even want to waste your precious energy on this person.
2. Connecting fantasy. To make the image of the offender even more miserable, use the visualization technique. At the moment when he spews his insults, imagine him in some ridiculous form (clown, midget, cockroach, bug, in a funny headdress, etc.) You can also mentally fence off your opponent with a glass wall: you see him, but that’s all what he says cannot penetrate your side.
3. Can respond nicely to insults. For example, to thank for the attention to your person: "Thank you for your interest in me". Or if you hear insults from a familiar person, then you can answer him with a smile: "I'm crazy about you too!" or "Your words won't stop me from loving you!"
4. Make the offender answer for his words. Ask for examples to back up the criticism. You can tell him: “What exactly is this manifested in?” or "Prove that I..."
5. You can answer your opponent with smart words. Clarifying questions often help to interrupt the endless stream of insults. For example: "What do you want from me?", "Can you suggest something?" Usually these phrases confuse the offender.
6. Humor can also work in your favor in this case.. The ability to witty answer is always a good defense weapon.
   Examples: “But from now on, I’ll ask you in more detail, please,” “Listen, how can you come up with nasty things so quickly? Or have you been preparing all night?”, “It’s really very hot here - your brain is already boiling!”
7. Call to conscience. You can openly ask the interlocutor: “How would you yourself respond if you were insulted like that?” This will discourage him, and turn his thoughts into a constructive direction.

All answers must be spoken calmly and confidently. You can do this both seriously and with a smile (depending on the situation and the type of reaction). Try to look directly into your opponent's eyes. This is an indicator of your courage.

How to respond to rudeness - examples of phrases

If we distinguish between rudeness, insults, rudeness, then the latter most often comes from strangers, unfamiliar or not particularly significant people for us. Therefore, we must always have such an attitude: everything that is pronounced by those with whom we have no relationship should not drive us crazy.

Feeling sorry for the boor or presenting him in a funny way, as in previous cases, are also effective techniques for coping with your own negative emotions at the time of a psychological attack.

The main rule is in no case to stoop to the level of a boor and not to use his own methods in response.

1. Ignoring fits perfectly in this case. You can not look at the offender at all (he is an empty place). Mentally imagine yourself, for example, as a stone or a mighty oak, the stability of which cannot be broken.
2. Don't take everything said personally. After all, quite often it turns out that you just fell under the “hot hand” (or rather, under the “hot” tongue) of the boor. And he, in turn, is angry at the whole world and his life in particular. But expresses anger in such an uncivilized way. It remains only to pity this unfortunate boor and sympathize with him.
3. Reduce the importance of what was said. For example: “Do you really think I care about your opinion?” or "Probably a very valuable remark, but I'm purple!"
4. Smile. A smile will strengthen your internal resources and will cause bewilderment in a boor.
5. It will be appropriate answer funny and sarcastic. This will defuse the situation and give you the opportunity to become the master of the situation. “You must be feeling a lot better! Congratulations!" or “The audience is thrilled! Are you working for her?"
6. direct question: “You are rude to me. Do you want to hurt me or do you have another goal?
7. You can make the offender think: “Be careful with your expressions. They say that everything said can come back to you in double size..
8. Bold answer. For example: “You are unoriginal, come up with something better next time”.
9. Rate the offender: “Rudeness does not suit you”, “I hope that rudeness is just your mask, and in fact you are better.”
10. Release in peace:“Don't worry, and happiness will come to you. Less negativity - and everything will work out!

It is important not only to prepare for situations of rudeness and be able to correctly respond to rudeness and insults, but also in general to pay attention to your approach to life and, if necessary, change it. Be positive in everything and do not expect “kicks” from life and others. Appreciate and love yourself, and other people will treat you the same way. Do not take everything very close to your heart, because it is one. Better let him fight at full strength, enjoy life and breathe deeply!

How to respond to an insult

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