On the eve of the departure of the youth team of Ukraine to Cherkassy for the qualifying match of the European Championship (U-21) against their peers from Iceland, the coach of the "blue-yellow" team answered the questions of the correspondent of the newspaper "Komanda".

— Sergey Ivanovich, will the Ukrainian national team go to the next match against Iceland with the motto “nowhere to retreat”?

- For us, the quality of the game is very important, but we do not forget about the positive result, so we will do our best to bring these two components together.

- A lot of new-old players have been called up for the matches against Iceland and France. Are these organizational conclusions after the defeat by Macedonia?

- If you remember the work of our coaching staff, then there are changes at almost every stage of preparation. This means that we give a chance to each of the players to prove themselves. Now young people are trusted in clubs, so they have all the prerequisites for growth, speaking in the national team.

— Shakhtar striker Boryachuk was called up from the newcomers...

— Andriy is now scoring a lot as part of the Pitmen's youth team, so why not see him in action and in the national team jersey.

— Are there any losses?

- Burda was injured. And after consulting doctors, they decided that it was better for him to be treated at the club. Migunov and Khoblenko have been damaged, but they should be in service soon.

- Before the match with Macedonia, you said that your team lacked teamwork. How will you solve this problem now?

— A lot depends on the intellect of the players, therefore, communicating with the guys individually and during the training process, we try to convey to them all the subtleties of what our coaching staff wants to see, and also try to draw conclusions after the matches with Macedonia and Denmark.

— Iceland— the leader of our group. Is this a surprise?

For many fans, perhaps it is. But I want to say that this country has been running a state program for 20 years, according to which many football arenas have been built, there are Spanish and Dutch systems for training young players. And the result of all this high-quality work is that the national team of Iceland entered the European Championship, playing in a group with such monsters as Holland, the Czech Republic and Turkey.

The youth team of the last convocation reached the playoff matches of the European Championship. Yes, and the youth team (players born in 1995), which now represents the interests of the youth team, participated in the final part of the Euro in 2012. So we are in for an interesting and difficult match.

- Nevertheless, the style of play of the Icelanders, who are not called “Our Boys” in their homeland, is they great physical readiness and fighting on every part of the field?

They use their strengths. This is power football, a lot of long passes, there are also elements of ball control. And still it is necessary to note their game discipline.

— In the matches against Iceland and France, how many points would you be satisfied with?

- Maximum amount. In general, we have an even group, and I'm sure that each of the rivals will lose points. How could anyone assume that the same Icelanders would stumble at home in the game with Northern Ireland? Therefore, it is too early to say in advance who is closer to entering the Euro. It is very important for our children to understand that everything depends only on us.

— The junior team will play all their home matches in Cherkassy. Why?

- The Ukrainian national team is the number one team in the country, and it is natural that we would like to play in any region where there would be a full stadium. In Cher-kassy all conditions are created for this. It's just that in some other cities there are no such conditions. And above all, this concerns the infrastructure of the host arenas. Although, I repeat, we are ready to play everywhere. Would three-buns be empty in Rovno, Khmelnitsky or Krivoy Rog? But not everything depends on our football federation...

Sergey Demyanchuk

Hello! My name is Alexander, I am 25 years old, born and raised in St. Petersburg. I want to tell you my story about how I encountered neurosis, panic attacks and agoraphobia, obsessive thoughts and hypochondria, and how I managed to successfully and almost completely get rid of these unpleasant and useless experiences.

Perhaps I’ll start by telling you a little about myself and my past, since the roots of all my mistakes in thinking, character and perception of the world around me and myself in particular grow from there:

I was born in a dysfunctional family, an alcoholic mother and a walking father, whom I never saw, a small room on the outskirts of the city. It was a gift of fate that at the age of 2 my unlucky mother was deprived of parental rights and my guardians took me to live in a two-room apartment - my current beloved mother and grandmother (God rest her soul), who passed away this spring at the age of 93 ...

As a child, I was spoiled, overprotected, until recently I lived with my mother in the same room, which also greatly affected my upbringing and character, I have always been very suspicious, anxious, overly cowardly, but at the same time a perfectionist and tried to control everything and all in your life. Like everyone else, I went to school, I studied perfectly well until the 6th grade, but then my grades began to drop rapidly due to my passion for sports, in which I immediately began to succeed and soon I was able to achieve good results, at the age of 17-18 I has already been a multiple champion and winner of the city and country championships.

He entered a sports university for a day, but was expelled from the very first year for poor progress. At the moment I am in my last year of the correspondence department of the Faculty of Economics, where I entered, as they say, for the sake of “crust” and in order not to upset my parents, and I still think that I should have chosen a humanitarian direction rather than studying the exact sciences and economics (at school it’s much easier for me Russian language, literature, history were given, but I could not enter mathematics, physics, etc.)).

I work as a manager in a small company engaged in design and construction in the field of energy supply, which also does not bring me satisfaction at the moment and I do not see myself in this profession in the future.

In general, the lion's share of tension and worries in my life is caused by uncertainty and a desire to quickly find myself in this life, resistance to reality and a desire for change, despite the fact that I am very lazy and, due to my upbringing, I am not used to taking responsibility and making serious decisions on my own, I’m used to not to solve problems, but to put them on the back burner and avoid meeting them. In my personal life, I also have nothing definite, I am not married, I have no children and have never had a serious relationship ..

For the last 4 years, I periodically began to drive myself strongly with thoughts that I was seriously ill with something and other obsessive thoughts. At first, I was diagnosed with a hernia of the back, which was most likely an ordinary nervous strain and having gone on vacation in 2011, I forgot about it, but but almost immediately I started having problems with digestion, and due to my super suspiciousness and anxiety, I began to inflate this problem and cheat myself with almost cancer of anything, even found almost blood in the stool (before that, our imagination and faith in certain things, even absurd ones, can deceive us and wishful thinking), and constant searches and comparison of symptoms on the Internet did their job - I found and appropriated everything that was at least a little like my guesses about the “terrible disease”

I already had symptoms (tachycardia, pressure) then - during the exacerbation of these nervous experiences about my sores, but then I had not yet reached the peak and these experiences did not cross the border and did not result in panic attacks and agoraphobia .. I just don’t I paid attention to them and was only concerned that I had only a few months left to live)))

At the end of 2014, at one of the regular weekend parties, I tried one, as they say, “light drug”. In general, to be honest, over the past few years, I have not been shy about pumping up alcohol on weekends, which helped me become more confident in myself and forget about my problems for a while and feel more relaxed and sociable than I really was. But this time, everything was a little different ... A couple of days of unbridled fun under the influence of a drug and mixed alcohol, I was pretty beat up.

As usual, on Monday I went to work on a little rest after all the drunk and mixed things. Sitting on the subway and driving one stop, I suddenly felt an unprecedented feeling of wild fear and panic, a desire to run away from there as soon as possible, as if I had fallen into some kind of hole. The people sitting opposite looked at me and did not understand what was happening to me. I blushed, began to cover my face with my hands, my heart was beating at a frantic speed and it seemed ready to jump out, it became difficult for me to breathe and it seemed that this was some kind of heart attack and I was about to die ...

Running out at the next stop, I left the subway and walked back home to a friend with whom we spent this crazy weekend. I then thought that this effect of the drug had not yet ended and decided to sit out with him and recover, I was afraid to go home in this form, I was afraid that my parents would see that something was wrong with me ... the next two days were just hell - I was afraid to go out on the street, I couldn’t fall asleep, I ate a whole bunch of sedatives and at night I already wanted to call an ambulance or go to droppers, I had to take a few days off at work ..

I felt sick, every 15-20 minutes I ran to the toilet for a little, digestion was disturbed, my nerves were like taut strings, and from every rustle I shuddered as if a bomb had exploded next to me.

A few days later, I more or less came to my senses and went to work, went home and, on the whole, moved a little away from the wild horror, believing that I had fully recovered from the disastrous party ... but it wasn’t there - the attack repeated first at work under the boss (I had to say that there was something wrong with pressure) - then again in the subway - then already at home lying in bed at night .. I didn’t understand what was happening to me, my hands were constantly shaking, throwing cold sweat on my nerves, my eyelids were twitching, it seemed to me that I had lost my mind and my brain is permanently and permanently damaged from taking this ill-fated “soft drug.”

I began to experience depersonalization and derealization, everything around me seemed somehow unreal, I could not keep my attention on something for a long time, I could not read or even watch TV, my body and muscles were constantly in tension, my neck ached, I suffered from insomnia, I drank handfuls of valerian and other pressure pills ..

In the end, I remembered that I have a psychotherapist friend and decided to go to see him. After listening to me, he immediately diagnosed panic attacks, wrote me a couple of prescriptions for antidepressants and some other strong sedative, and said that everything would pass in a month. Having bought all these drugs, something stopped me from immediately starting taking antidepressants, most likely after reading reviews on the Internet that after their cancellation it becomes very bad, I was just afraid to start taking the course right away.

During the winter holidays, I planned to fly on vacation and I already had tickets on hand, but naturally, being in such a deplorable psychological state, and even since childhood, being terribly afraid of planes on the day of departure in agony, I handed over the tickets and, after a couple of hours of tantrums, called a taxi and left for the remaining holidays to the dacha in the Leningrad region ... so I launched the avoidance mechanism ...

After spending a week in the country in depression and a terrible state, I climbed the Internet from morning to evening and looked for ways to get rid of this ailment with the terrible name “panic attacks”, talked on forums, from where my “sick” brain picked up more and more new symptoms and avoidance and began to appropriate them for myself ... one evening, as always, while reading information on the Internet about VVD and panic attacks, I came across Pavel Fedorenko's website, where I had the opportunity to download a free book-guide to getting rid of all my problems.

Literally in a couple of hours, having “swallowed” this book, for some reason I immediately believed everything that was written there and decided to act in this direction. Somehow, after going to work after the holidays, I began to try not to avoid avoidance and follow the advice that I read in the book “A happy life without VVD and panic attacks”, but of course, at first, without understanding the essence of my problem, I didn’t succeed, but that was the beginning of my journey back to normal life without panic, because without trial and error there is no result ..

At that time, I had already begun to avoid a lot of things and narrowed my life down to a tiny “comfort zone” in which, as it seemed to me, a panic attack would not get me: I completely excluded alcohol, coffee, even quit smoking for a while, but quickly returned to this addiction after visiting a cardiologist, who said that “at least I can go into space”)) Later, I also took tests and did ultrasound of almost all organs, which also did not reveal any pathologies and made me understand that all problems and symptoms are only in my head. I stopped communicating with friends, avoided work meetings with the boss and just business negotiations, often avoided travel by transport, cinemas and places where I could not quickly leave in the event of an attack ..

Studying the book and video recordings of Pavel Fedorenko, I gradually began to understand what was happening to me and the level of anxiety subsided a little from around the clock, but I still made many mistakes and only occasionally left the “comfort zone” I had created. At the end of March, I decided to sign up for Pashin's training called "Healthy Thinking System". At first, information and practices were difficult for me, because at that moment I was still looking for a “magic pill” and dreamed of getting rid of the symptoms of VSD and panic as soon as possible, and the brain resisted adequately perceiving the information.

Over time, I got better and better, I began to understand and realize that panic attacks did not arise on their own, I began to understand what led to them and that the root of the problem was really in my thinking, habits and established stereotypes and behavior in life, I began Practice the practices given in class.

At the moment, I feel almost completely free. I stopped avoiding coffee, alcohol (although now much less often and not in such quantities as before)), I go to work and chat with friends, go to the cinema and ride public transport, I started going to the gym and swimming pool, I go to the bathhouse once a week, I didn’t take antidepressants and just threw them away along with prescriptions a couple of months ago, I attend exhibitions, go out of town and, in principle, I don’t have strong restrictions anymore, except that I didn’t go to other cities after my “illness” either on a plane or the train has not yet landed, but I am sure that this is all ahead of me, I try not to rush things and accept both my successes and small setbacks and life's difficulties.

It is very important to understand and realize that we all fell into neurosis and the psychological disorders resulting from it did not immediately, our lifestyle and perception of the world around us led us to this dead end, and at the level of thinking that we had before panic attacks, the problem cannot be solved, panic attacks are just the tip of the iceberg, the signal of the body that we have already gone too far and it’s time to change something in our lives, and that part of the iceberg that is “under water”, which is invisible to us, is precisely our maladaptive behavior, our wrong reactions to certain events, infantilism, irresponsibility, inability to cope with emotions that sometimes put our nervous system out of order for several hours or even days, a lot of obligations to ourselves and the world around us, in general, inadequate thinking ... you can go in for sports and remove symptoms, but still feel anxiety, you can meditate and try to find spiritual harmony, but still feel discomfort in uncomfortable situations yah and exciting moments.

In conclusion, I want to say that after a few months I continue to work on myself, I returned to my usual calm state and little, and probably already almost impossible to return me to the chaos in my head that I had in winter, but looking from the outside, and also with the help of the community in which I am, I understand that I still have to make many new discoveries in myself and overcome myself in many ways before I can become a truly happy person.

I wish everyone who is faced with such a problem as VVD and panic attacks patience and faith in themselves, not to make mistakes in getting rid of them, and a deep awareness of the fact that all anxieties and fears are just thoughts, and only we ourselves have them we create and then blindly believe in them, losing the most valuable thing we have in life - the present moment and real life, let's learn to live in the present and not in thoughts about the past and worries about the future ... all the best)

* Note: spelling, punctuation and style of the author preserved.

It is important to understand that men do not realize that they are doing this.

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Article subject:	It is important to understand that men do not realize that they are doing this.
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Your partner will never say, after hearing your good advice: ʼʼHoney, how did I not think of that beforeʼʼ. He'll decide, ʼʼWell, I'll wait until Tuesday and then I'll pass this off as my own, and if you ask him, he'll swear he doesn't remember what you were talking about before Tuesday. The best advice I can give you here is to discuss this matter with your man, let him read these pages and see what happens. After all, it's not the most relationship-damaging habit - it's just really annoying!

4. Why doesn't my partner know how to express his tenderness and admiration to me the way I express to him?

Here's the situation for you: you and your partner decided to spend the evening together - dinner and dancing. You spend an hour and a half working on your hair, manicure, makeup, putting on a beautiful new dress. You enter the living room to greet your man and say:

And here I am, dear. Well, how do I look?

Your partner looks at you for a second and says:

You look good.

Then he goes to get the car keys.

You are left standing in the middle of the room with a terrible feeling of disappointment. ʼʼOkay, you think to yourself. - And what is all he can say?ʼʼ When your man returns, you tell him that you are a little offended by ᴇᴦο inattention.

But I told you that you look good, - he replies with surprise. What else do you want to hear from me?

Well, didn't you notice my new dress, or didn't you pay attention to my hairstyle and everything else?

Do you know what your problem is? your partner says, raising his voice. - You are never satisfied with anything - no matter what I do, everything is bad for you.

And you, being involved in a quarrel, cannot understand what the matter is.

And here's why it happens: unlike women, men do not notice details. Let's go back to the first chapter where we talked about male genetic memory. The men were taught to pay attention to the big picture, and the women to the details: the men looked out for enemy tribes on the horizon while the women watched the fire and the children; the men thought about how many acres of land they could work in a day and what to sow it for next year, while the women thought about what to cook for lunch today; the men were worried about having enough money to send their kids to college and pay the rent, while the women were worried about whether the kids had clean linen to go to school tomorrow. This does not mean that some of the levels of these worries are better, and some are worse - it's just different ways of perceiving the world around us that men and women are used to.

Yes, you know everything yourself.

How many times, discussing the furniture that you saw with your friends, did you hear your husband's question: ʼʼWhat, was the sofa blue? And I didn't notice.

Did you ask your partner: ʼʼDo you know my green dress with a white collar - do you think it will look better at your cousin's wedding than a black velvet suit?ʼʼ - and he looked at you helplessly until you finally began to understand that he doesn't remember the dresses you're talking about at all.

Most, but certainly not all men, do not pay as much attention to color, shape, quality and other details as women, who are used to noticing everything.

The problem is that women subconsciously expect the same perception from men.

Therefore, when you ask your partner: ʼʼHow do I look?ʼʼ - you expect from him the same answer that you yourself would give if he asked you about it - details, details, details. You know how your girlfriend reacts when she sees you in a new dress: ʼʼOh, Barbara, what's new? I love. Turn around, let me look behind you. You know, this style really suits your figure. And how well you picked everything up - it looks just wonderfulʼʼ.

This does not mean that men do not want to express their feelings to you or praise you - they just do not pay attention to it, they are not used to delving into these issues. Moreover, most men do not even suspect that there is some kind of problem here until you explain it to them.

Decision:

It is important to understand that men do not realize that they are doing this. - concept and types. Classification and features of the category "It is important to understand that men do not realize that they act in this way." 2017-2018.

Family relationships

Lack of knowledge on how to behave correctly in certain situations, misunderstanding of the differences between male and female nature, ignoring the characteristics of the male and female psyche, ignorance and failure to fulfill the duties of a husband and wife - all this can create big problems in family relationships, which often happens in modern families.

Vedic and modern culture of family relations

As you already understood, the material is taken from the ancient wisdom - the Vedas, or rather, from the lectures of O.G. Torsunov and some other Vedic authors. In this article, only general information, a brief overview of important points that you can study in detail by listening to the seminar "Family Relations" ...

(fragment continued below - Yu.K.)

audio Yuri Kosagovsky - SPOUSE CONFLICT* Muzeum Rondizm TV

WHAT IS MOST IMPORTANT UNDERSTAND IN CONFLICTS

today we will do as we did in your childhood and tomorrow we will do as in my childhood


it is important to understand that the other side that is arguing with you
says everything sincerely and for her all this is important

why?
because as a child the child saw
that this is how (!) they act in a similar situation

and the rejection seems unacceptable
and dangerous for development ...

at the same time in your childhood everything was different
and you perceive just as sharply the inadmissibility
act differently than in your childhood

that's the whole situation
- what else is impossible to do!?

and both are right...

output?

there is only one way out so that no one suffers
and did not consider his life ruined
- agree to take turns

today as in your childhood and tomorrow as in mine
- this is important for the child:

he learns a variety of behaviors
and will be armed more than if he was raised by one parent
- he will have options how to act ...
(in a difficult situation)

=========

continuation

It should be understood that there is a huge difference between the modern and ancient Vedic culture of family or marriage relations, and now this culture has been largely lost, which leads to family problems and conflicts. The inability to deal effectively with emerging problems and conflicts is another indicator of the loss (absence) of knowledge and wisdom.

How to choose the right partner to start a family

Choosing the right future husband or wife is the most important thing to do before marriage. If we choose a person who is incompatible with us, we will experience disappointment and suffering. In modern life, in many cases, the question of choice is not even worth it - both fell in love and got married. There is no reasonable approach to this matter; there is an approach based on feelings, and after some time comes the understanding that these feelings, it turns out, are fleeting. Awareness of incompatibility comes after the beginning of a life together, when love disappears.

It would be wise to check compatibility before the beginning of a relationship, and in any case - until the decision to marry or get married.

Astrological compatibility you can try to study on your own, but it is better if you have a good astrologer with extensive experience, especially if he specializes in Vedic astrology, and does not engage in consumer goods.

It also plays a very important role compatibility in mental centers(chakras), as detailed in the above lectures. Apparently, most of the relationships of the modern degrading world are built on the harmony of the lower centers, which basically means compatibility at the level of sex, etc., while all other compatibility is ignored to one degree or another, which automatically excludes the real happiness of family relationships.

Features of the male and female psyche

It must be understood that the male nature is strikingly different from the female; female and male psyche are different things. Due to misunderstanding of this, many conflicts and problems arise in family relationships. Women cannot understand men, men cannot understand women - because they have a different nature. Therefore, sometimes they tend to expect the impossible from each other.

In fact, these two natures - male and female - must complement each other, balance and harmonize. If there is no harmony in the relationship, then either there is a strong incompatibility (and then it is better to leave), or one of the spouses (or both) does not understand their own nature and the nature of the spouse, and there is also no understanding and / or fulfillment of their responsibilities, which will be discussed later.

Marriage and the development of family relationships

Marriage is a very serious matter, more serious for a woman than for a man, and this point should be taken into account by future spouses.

Prosperous and harmonious development of relations depends on each of the spouses - on their knowledge and fulfillment of their duties, initially determined by nature itself. Relationships cannot develop on their own - they need to be built with efforts from both sides. When this stops, the relationship falls apart.

Duties of Husband and Wife

The Vedic texts describe the duties of a husband and the duties of a wife, which are clearly demarcated. It's like an instruction to follow reasonable, because it allows you to build harmonious family relationships, avoiding unnecessary conflicts and problems. Ignorance or failure to perform their duties necessarily causes trouble, which can be resolved by returning to the performance of their own duties.

Features of modern family relations

Since we live in an era of degradation, few people know their duties in family relationships in full, and they are often confused - the wife does what the husband should do by nature, and the husband does what the wife should do. And even knowing your duties, it can be difficult to fulfill them.

Why is it difficult to move on to your duties? There are many reasons, depending on which side you look at the situation. For example, the ego interferes, which manifests itself in the unwillingness to be the first to admit that one is wrong and begin to act according to one's nature. On the other hand, it can be said that unworked karma (past lives) “presses”, causing incorrect (unreasonable, inappropriate) behavior. A long-term habit of doing something other than your own also plays a role - it’s difficult to rebuild like that right away.

Problems in family relationships

Of course, problems arise and they need to be solved. Not the correct approach to this is to blame the spouse for their occurrence. This is a manifestation of unreasonable selfishness, which never leads to a real solution to the problem.

There are no irreparable situations, and the first thing to do is to properly clarify your own duties for yourself and understand what their failure to fulfill (to see your situation) leads to, which is covered in detail in the lectures. And then gradually rebuild, noting for yourself how life in the family becomes more harmonious.

Managing problems in family relationships

Correctly (i.e. reasonably, wisely) regulating problems in relationships can be hindered by your own selfishness. And there is a simple and powerful remedy for this - the formula of happiness. It does not suit only one category of people - notorious egoists who have no chance of becoming happy in this life (precisely because of selfishness). Everyone else will greatly benefit by applying the happiness formula to their soul mate, but you do not need to tell your spouse about this.

If a person, due to his egoism (“I don’t want”, “I won’t”, “I don’t believe”, etc.) is not able to apply the formula of happiness, perhaps he will be able to work with dualities, which will also significantly contribute to the settlement of family problems. In many cases, the technique described in the article How to build relationships can help.

If you cannot solve problems in family relationships on your own, you can contact a psychologist who has experience in Vedic psychology. Before that, it is advisable to study your duties - save time, nerves and money.

Parenting

Who, how (and why) should raise children? What is the role of the father and what is the role of the mother in raising children? Who should raise the boy and who should raise the girl? Not everything is so simple, and there are many important points that I will not mention here either. From the upbringing of children depends on what this will lead to in the future.

It should not be thought that improper upbringing affects only the fate of children. According to the law of karma, all the mistakes made in life, including in raising children, are returned to us.

The impact of family relationships

Of course, family relationships affect other areas of human life. If there are problems in the family, this will in any case affect the mood and health of a person, which cannot but be reflected in work, in the circle of friends and in spiritual practice. Since everything in this world is interconnected, and family relationships are most of all related to the so-called "personal life", it is better to start regulating your life problems from your personal life.

Whether you will be successful, happy and satisfied with life depends largely on your soul mate. But if you dig even deeper, then, of course, it depends on you - on what and how you do in family relationships.

By fulfilling his duties in family relationships, a person receives harmony, which almost automatically puts things in order outside the family. Therefore, family relationships should be given quite a lot of importance.

family karma

In Vedic lectures, one often hears that family karma is the heaviest, and this is true. Family karma combines both the karma of the family in which we grow up and the karma of the family we create. As a rule, it is much easier to change the circle of friends, work and some other circumstances of life, if they do not suit you, than to change the family that we have created. Moreover, it is impossible to change the family in which we were born.

By fate, we were supposed to be born in such a family, to have precisely such problems - in order to learn how to solve them correctly.

The way out of the trap of family karma is to understand your duties, fulfill them, and pass the exam with an "A". And I want to remind you once again that a universal remedy that greatly facilitates this task is happiness formula.

Another way out is enlightenment, which is what this site is dedicated to. But it should be understood that working on yourself cannot be an excuse for not fulfilling family responsibilities if you already have a family, because this will not contribute to spiritual growth.

Happiness and selfishness in family relationships

In family relationships, happiness depends on what is the direction of the life of each of the spouses - to live for themselves (for their own pleasure) or to live for others (for the common good - family and society). The selfish orientation to "live for yourself" automatically delays the happiness of family relationships, and this is a very important point. It is impossible to get family happiness if you want happiness only for yourself, and even getting happiness for yourself turns out to be impossible in this case. Because as soon as you pull the “blanket over yourself”, another person (husband or wife) automatically joins this egoistic game, who also begins to want to possess the entire “blanket”, that is, to get happiness only for himself. Remember that happiness and selfishness are incompatible.

The same is true in other areas - one's own egoism includes the egoism of other people with whom communication or any kind of relationship arises. Yes, your selfishness is also turned on and fueled by the fact that everyone around you is also selfish. Therefore, no one is happy. There is only one way out of this vicious circle - to get rid of the ego, one's own. You should not worry about the egoism of others, their egoism will dry up after the disappearance of your own. The reason for this is very simple: selfishness requires an adversary, an opponent. If you do not have egoism, then the egoism of another person in relations with you is unable to survive, since he needs confrontation, a game. There is no game - the ego is fading. So simple.

It should be understood that you cannot run away from family karma, and as an example of this, many women and men who have divorced experience almost the same problems in their next marriage as in the first or previous one. The person has changed, the problems remain. This once again suggests that nothing in our life is accidental, and we need to learn from our mistakes, correct them - only then the recurring negative situations stop.

Therefore, there is no need to rush to leave the family and get divorced, in many cases this does not solve problems, but only creates new ones. You need to see right away whether you are fulfilling all your duties in the family, whether you live mainly for yourself, whether you expect more from your spouse than is possible and reasonable.

There are, of course, situations when divorce is the only way out, but more often the reasonable way out is to build relationships and save the family by stepping over your ego.

If love is gone, it does not mean that forever, and in many cases it can be returned. There are several useful tools and recommendations on this subject in the article. How to bring love back into a relationship. Of course, these are just general recommendations and tools, and they do not replace the need to study the issue of family relations in more depth.

Research of family relations, test

And in conclusion, I propose to do a very important test - a study or analysis of your family relationships. This happens as you listen to lectures. Perhaps this will be quite enough to understand what to do to improve family relations, and start doing it.

As for family consultations, I do not give them for the simple reason that I have too little experience in this area. But, it is quite possible that you will not need them after listening to lectures. Lectures by Dr. Torsunov "Family Relations" can be downloaded for free from the link above, or they can be listened to online at the "Audioveda" website, as well as lectures on family relations by other lecturers.

I'm sorry that the article came out not very informative, and more like an advertisement for lectures, but there is so much material that I would have to do a couple of dozen articles, which does not quite correspond to the general theme of the site. But so much the better for you - listen to an expert on this issue.

Be happy! =============

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