Storytelling. How to use the power of stories

Publishing text http://www.litres.ru/pages/biblio_book/?lfrom=430652910&art=5024483 Storytelling. How to Use the Power of Stories: Mann,

Ivanov and Ferber; M.; 2013 ISBN 978-5-91657-507-1

annotation

Storytelling, or storytelling, is a persuasion technique that is widespread in the West. The author of this book, Annette Simmons, is not only a communications consultant. She is also a professional storyteller who teaches this art to business people.

In her book, she gets to the heart of storytelling and explains how stories “work,” how they affect the listener’s emotions, and why they convince, motivate, and inspire better than orders, logical reasoning, or philosophical reasoning.

This book will be useful to anyone who has to speak to a large audience, as well as those who want to improve the effectiveness of communications.

Annette Simmons Storytelling. How to use the power of stories

© Annette Simmons, 2006 © Russian translation, Russian edition, layout. LLC "Mann, Ivanov and Ferber", 2013

The electronic version of the book was prepared by Litres (

www.litres.ru)

The author dedicates this book to the memory of Dr. James Noble Farr

Foreword

Once, in a convention center nestled among picturesque green hills, I was leading a seminar on storytelling, the art of oral storytelling. The gentle Virginian climate had slowly melted the ice shell that had shackled me through the long Boston winter. The enthusiasts gathered in the hall were friendly and benevolent. And suddenly I noticed in this crowd a truly radiant face, in it, as if in a mirror, my whole story was reflected. I realized that I hit the target - a spiritual connection arose between me and this listener.

After the performance, I tracked down this girl and immediately realized that she did not quite fit into the company of teachers, lecturers, religious mentors and just lovers of storytelling: Annette Simmons and her friend Cheryl DeChantis came from the world of big business. And both were terribly excited about the prospects that our art promised this field of activity.

I regarded their venture with suspicion, if not skepticism: the world of business was terribly far from me. Do they really think that directors, managers, salespeople - all these people who are accustomed to operate only with accounting calculations - will be seriously interested in my art and will be able to derive some benefit from it?

However, Annette convinced me. At the time, she was working for a company as a “difficult situations” consultant: explaining to cool managers how to solve problems with “uncomfortable” people. Annette weaned them from the crude tactics of street fighters and instilled in them the graceful skills of martial artists.

By understanding the meaning of storytelling, she was able to delve into the details that, in fact, make it an effective business tool. Annette fully felt the full power - even if indirect - of this peculiar form of communication. Her knowledge of the basics of the communication effect of advertising also helped her: Annette managed to combine both approaches and received a powerful method of influence as a result.

Very soon I felt like not only a teacher, but also a student. I helped Annette understand the art of storytelling, and she helped me become an ambassador for storytelling in the big business world. Now Annette has written a book that, like any good book, demonstrates the truth in a way that simply cannot be overlooked.

What is valuable in it? This book brings together three closely related ideas. First, the revival of storytelling in our advanced world and the understanding of the mental and emotional processes that storytelling unleashes. Second: the growing understanding in the business community that the success of an enterprise is possible only when the people working in it give their physical and mental strength to the cause; otherwise, it turns out to be a hack, from which both employees and companies suffer. And finally, the third: storytelling helps us use the achievements of practical psychology and achieve a sustainable impact on people, while maintaining a respectful attitude towards them.

Introduction

It was October 1992. It was a windy day with typical Tennessee weather. Four hundred people gathered in a tent covered with dense fabric. We were waiting for the next speaker. The people crept up the most different - urban fashionistas and harsh farmers, professors and undergraduate students. Sitting next to me was a grey-bearded farmer wearing a National Rifle Association baseball cap. When the African American entered the stage, the farmer leaned over to his wife, who was sitting next to him, and whispered something in her ear in annoyance. Я разобрала слово «ниггер» и решила, что не смолчу, если он еще раз скажет что-нибудь подобное. But the farmer fell silent and began to study the canvas shed with a bored look. And the speaker began his story about how in the sixties, somewhere in the outback of Mississippi, he and his friends were sitting around the fire at night. The civil rights march was scheduled for tomorrow, and the people were afraid of the coming morning, they didn't know what it would bring them. Everyone silently looked at the flame, and then one of them sang ... And the song conquered fear. The story was so talented that we all saw that fire in front of us and felt the fear of those people. The narrator asked us to sing along with him. We sang Swing Low, Sweet Chariot2. The farmer next to me also sang. I saw a tear running down his weathered cheek. So I was convinced of the power of the word. The radical black rights activist was able to touch the heart of an ultra-conservative racist. I longed to understand how he did it.

This book is about what I have learned in the last eight years. It's about the mastery of storytelling, the power of persuasion in a good story. I write about everything I know about this wonderful art.

While studying storytelling, I realized one very important thing. The science or art of influencing through oral storytelling cannot be taught in the traditional way, from handbooks and manuals. To understand what influence is, we have to abandon convenient models of cause and effect. The magic of influence is not in what we say, but in how we say it, and also in what we are. This dependence is not amenable to rational analysis and cannot be described using the usual schemes and tables.

The dismemberment of the art of storytelling into fragments, parts and priorities destroys it. There are truths that we simply know; we cannot prove them, but we know they are true. Storytelling takes us to areas where we trust our knowledge, even if we cannot measure, weigh it or evaluate it empirically.

This book will give your "rational" left brain a little rest. For the most part, it appeals to the "intuitive" right hemisphere. The secret of the influence of oral story is based on the creativity of people. But this ability to be creative can be stifled by the erroneous postulate that if you can't explain what you know, then you don't know it. In fact, we all have knowledge that we are not even aware of. Once you begin to trust your own wisdom, you can use it to influence others and encourage them to discover the depths of yet unrealized wisdom themselves.

Your wisdom and persuasive power are like a bag of magic beans that you put in a drawer and forgot about. This book is written just so that you can find the very bag and regain the oldest tool of influence - oral storytelling. Stories are not only fairy tales and moralizing parables. Telling a good story is like watching a documentary and telling about it so that others, those who haven't seen it, have a full understanding of it. A good story can touch the soul of the most stubborn opponent or the power-hungry villain who blocks your path, depriving you of the opportunity to achieve your goals. If you are not sure that the villain has a soul, I advise you to reconsider the movie The Grinch Stole Christmas3. Everyone has a soul. (In fact, there are not many dangerous sociopaths in the world.) And deep down, every person wants to be proud of himself and feel his importance - this is where the opportunity to influence him with the right story lies.

Finally, the Russian reader will see a full-fledged book about Storytelling...
If the publishing house has not changed its mind, this book should have my comment... THE FIRST BOOK IN RUSSIAN LANGUAGE WITH THE WORD STORITELLING...
and
And of course my review...

The Art of Storytelling. Inspire and influence...

"History is not capable of usurping power and influence, but it is capable of creating them..."
Annette Simone Storytelling. How to use the power of stories

The Mann, Ivanov and Farber publishing house invited me to write a review about
A book dedicated to storytelling and I naturally rejoiced in my heart:
the Russian-speaking audience is not spoiled with books about this modern, sought-after
in the civilized world of technology, science, philosophy. When did I learn the name and
author, I rejoiced - I used the materials of the book by Annette Simmonet when writing
one of the chapters of Blueberry Pie for the Storyteller. Introduction to Power" (unfortunately
the only book about Storytelling by a Russian author). Already one thought that
before gaining the trust of any audience, the narrator must answer himself
the question "Who am I?" is worth it for this book to be highly recommended for
reading for those who are promoting something or attracting resources to
various projects, as well as those who want to influence their environment…

After I read the manuscript, I experienced an interesting and at the same time strange feeling.
As if I got a map with navigation to the place where the treasures are hidden, but I would get it after I went all this way on my own and sat over an open chest in which diamonds and gold jewelry shimmer…

This book is indeed such a map. The beauty of it is that you can go to the place to which it leads an infinite number of times and always find new treasures there ... As a person who has traveled this path and reached the treasure, I assure you, there will be enough of them for everyone ...
Because that place is you...

As far back as the end of the twentieth century, the Danish futurologist Rolf Jensen wrote in his book The Dream Society (in which I first read this sacred word “Storytelling”): “The sun sets over the information society…” Information, due to its abundance and easy accessibility, ceases to be a product demanded in the market.

Instead, the main products of the modern civilized market are "attention", "trust", "faith" and "influence". And this is exactly what Storyteller practices in following its Path…
1. Pay attention
2. Gain trust
3. Awaken Faith
4. Manage inspiring

Another great man, Robert McKee, already at the beginning of this century, devoted a whole book to History, which he called "Story" (into Russian, however, it was translated as "History in a Million", which indicates that the Russian-speaking audience does not yet see this million in the "History" itself). And what is remarkable, the subtitle of this book was the following - "a master class for screenwriters, writers AND NOT ONLY ..."

So these “NOT ONLY” are absolutely everything ...

Because no matter what a person, a group of people or a company does, no one can avoid participating in two processes - Promoting one's Name (idea, project) and attracting resources (material, financial, administrative, intellectual, human) to it. Both of these processes require self-confidence and are based on gaining the trust of "contractors", "clients" and "donors".
Where is our confidence and how to win the trust of the environment?
The book "Storytelling. How to Use the Power of Stories” will lead you to this place and teach you how to extract treasures from it every time the need arises ...

Two themes are central to this book: "How to gain trust?" and “How to influence the environment?”
And from the first pages, the author warns us: “The magic of influence is not in what we say, but in how we say it, and also in what we ourselves are - that is, influence depends on who we are. . This dependence is not amenable to rational analysis and cannot be described using the usual schemes and tables. Influence comes from attitude towards you and your goals. In the sphere of feelings and emotions (and they are irrational by definition) there are no matters "organized" in the traditional sense. The desire to "organize" and streamline communication and influence leads only to gradual "universal" models - beautiful, but completely useless. These models are difficult to adapt to real life, they are difficult to remember in stressful situations, and yet such situations are waiting for us at every turn ... "

There was also an ironic mention that has now appeared in many gurus teaching “communication”, “personal growth”, “leadership” and other popular disciplines ...
“Communication courses really bake graduates. These graduates are sure that they are “ready to communicate in a new way”, but after three months it turns out that they have not changed their previous behavior in the least. This is because they were taught new tricks, but not rid of the old beliefs that underlie the inability to communicate (for example, “if I said something, I would never go back on my words”, “hold information - this is a great strategy”, “telling the truth means putting an end to a career”). Traditional methods of influence operate at such a superficial level that not only have no effect, but also inspire a false sense of success ... "

Annette Simone proposes to move from rationality and linearity to irrationality and consistency. From facts and notes to stories (with a capital letter). Remember that any social, business and everyday processes come down to communication between PEOPLE, and not legal entities, social statuses and positions ...

To perceive the world around us and the people who inhabit it with their voluminous stories (which, in fact, they are) and not laid out in flat schemes, business plans, strategies and formulas ...
“You can divide the story into fragments that have lost all meaning, provide it with reference points, highlight stages and steps: the first, second, third, all this will look very beautiful, but it will never make you a good storyteller ...”

Nevertheless, in Storytelling there is a very specific set of rules, following which you can develop your intuition, emotional intelligence, and with their help learn how to gain the trust of the audience and influence it ...

But what shocked me most of all in this book was that in it for the first time (in educational and business literature) I read the words about the responsibility of people who receive the strongest tool to influence their environment ...

“The storyteller is the lifeblood that shapes the culture of an organization, community, family. We as humans are defined by the stories we tell. The norms and customs of any culture are conveyed by stories being told and retold. This is a great responsibility. What do you tell more often: stories of hope or a story of sacrifice?..”

And another very important point...

It is History that is the “object” around which any community can unite. After all, a beautiful and correct History is a Myth, a Ritual and a Sacrifice…
“Telling and listening to stories is a ritual that binds and unites people, breaking the illusion of separateness, it revives a deep sense of our collective interdependence. I never cease to be amazed at the impact that stories like “Who am I” and “Why am I here” have on people…”

Storytelling helps to unite the energy of the past, present and future…

Kirill P. Gopius
Storyteller, researcher, organizer of the first international storytelling
festival in Russia.

Copyright © 2006 Annette Simmons
© Translation into Russian, edition in Russian, design. LLC "Mann, Ivanov and Ferber", 2013

The electronic version of the book was prepared by Litres (www.litres.ru)

In memory of the doctor
James Noble Farr
the author dedicates this book

Foreword

Introduction

It was October 1992. It was a windy day with typical Tennessee weather. Four hundred people gathered in a tent covered with dense fabric. We were waiting for the next speaker. The people crept up the most different - city fashionistas and harsh farmers, professors and undergraduate students. Sitting next to me was a grey-bearded farmer wearing a National Rifle Association baseball cap. When the African American entered the stage, the farmer leaned over to his wife, who was sitting next to him, and whispered something in her ear in annoyance. Я разобрала слово «ниггер» и решила, что не смолчу, если он еще раз скажет что-нибудь подобное. But the farmer fell silent and began to study the canvas shed with a bored look. And the speaker began his story about how in the sixties, somewhere in the outback of Mississippi, he and his friends were sitting around the fire at night. The civil rights march was scheduled for tomorrow, and the people were afraid of the coming morning, they didn't know what it would bring them. Everyone silently looked at the flame, and then one of them sang ... And the song conquered fear. The story was so talented that we all saw that fire in front of us and felt the fear of those people. The narrator asked us to sing along with him. We sang Swing Low, Sweet Chariot. The farmer next to me also sang. I saw a tear running down his weathered cheek. So I was convinced of the power of the word. The radical black rights activist was able to touch the heart of an ultra-conservative racist. I longed to understand how he did it.
This book is about what I have learned in the last eight years. It's about the mastery of storytelling, the power of persuasion in a good story. I write about everything I know about this wonderful art.
While studying storytelling, I realized one very important thing. The science or art of influencing through oral storytelling cannot be taught in the traditional way, from handbooks and manuals. To understand what influence is, we have to abandon convenient models of cause and effect. The magic of influence is not in what we say, but in as we say, as well as in what we are ourselves. This dependence is not amenable to rational analysis and cannot be described using the usual schemes and tables.
The dismemberment of the art of storytelling into fragments, parts and priorities destroys it. There are truths that we simply know; we cannot prove them, but we know they are true. Storytelling takes us to areas where we trust our knowledge, even if we cannot measure, weigh it or evaluate it empirically.
This book will give your "rational" left brain a little rest. For the most part, it appeals to the "intuitive" right hemisphere. The secret of the influence of oral story is based on the creativity of people. But this ability to be creative can be stifled by the erroneous postulate that if you can't explain what you know, then you don't know it. In fact, we all have knowledge that we are not even aware of. Once you begin to trust your own wisdom, you can use it to influence others and encourage them to discover the depths of yet unrealized wisdom themselves.
Your wisdom and persuasive power are like a bag of magic beans that you put in a drawer and forgot about. This book is written just so that you can find that very bag and regain the oldest tool of influence - oral history. Stories are not only fairy tales and moralizing parables. Telling a good story is the same as watching a documentary and telling about it so that others, those who have not seen it, have a complete understanding of it. A good story can touch the soul of the most stubborn opponent or the power-hungry villain who blocks your path, depriving you of the opportunity to achieve your goals. If you are not sure that the villain also has a soul, I advise you to reconsider the movie The Grinch Stole Christmas. Everyone has a soul. (Actually, there are not many dangerous sociopaths in the world.) And deep down, every person wants to be proud of themselves and feel their importance - this is where the opportunity to influence him with the right story lies.
In this book, I often use my own stories as examples and often talk about myself. I tried my best to use the pronoun “I” as little as possible, but storytelling is a purely personal matter. I really hope that as you discuss my stories, you will begin to think about your own. You will realize that your best stories are about what happened or is happening to you. Never even stutter as if there is “nothing personal” about the subject of your story. If the subject is important, then it is always personal. In order for your story to reach the listener and influence him in the way you would like, you do not need to hide what is on your mind. In fact, it is the soul that tells the most compelling stories. Tell your story, the world needs it.

Chapter 1
Six main plots

To be human is to have a story to tell in reserve.

Skip looked into the faces of the shareholders, who were clearly wary and even hostile, and frantically thought about how to convince them. He is thirty-five years old, but he looks like a teenager, and besides, he is a rich man in the third generation: a suspicious combination. Not surprisingly, his appointment to a leadership position seems like a disaster to them. And then Skip decided to tell them a story.
At my first job, he began, I was engaged in the design of ship electrical networks. Errors in design and drawing up were not allowed, because after laying the wires and cables, the mold was filled with fiberglass and the slightest oversight could cost the company a million dollars, no less. By the age of twenty-five, I already had two master's degrees. I spent my whole life on ships, and in the end, these drawings, these diagrams, for me, to be honest, turned into a meaningless routine. Early one morning I got a phone call from some shipyard worker, one of those who earns six dollars an hour, and asked: am I sure about my scheme? I exploded. Of course I'm sure! "Pour in that damn mold and don't wake me up this early!" An hour later, the foreman of that guy called me and again asked if I was sure that the scheme was correct. This completely pissed me off. I yelled that I was sure of it an hour ago and I still am.
It wasn't until the president of the company called me and asked the same question that I finally got out of bed and rushed to work. If they want me to personally poke their nose into the blueprint, well, I'll poke it. I tracked down the worker who called me first. He sat at the table over my diagram and carefully examined it, strangely tilting his head. Trying my best to control myself, I patiently began to explain. As I spoke, my voice became less and less confident, and my head took on the same strange inclination as the worker's. It turned out that I (being left-handed by nature) mixed up the sides and swapped the starboard and port sides, and the result was a mirror image of what should have been. Thank God, the worker was able to notice my mistake in time. The next day I found a box on my desk. To warn me against future mistakes, the guys gave me a pair of multi-colored tennis shoes: a red left one for the port side, a green right one for the starboard side. These shoes remind me not only about the location of the boards, but also that you need to listen to what you are told, even if you are one hundred percent sure that you are right. And Skip raised those multicolored shoes over his head.
The shareholders smiled and calmed down. If this youngster has already been punched in the nose for his arrogance and has been able to learn from it, then perhaps he will be able to understand how to run a company.

believe me

People don't need new information. They are fed up with her. They need Vera- faith in you, in your goals, in your success. Faith—not facts—moves mountains. Just because you can get people to do something doesn't mean you can influence them. True influence is when people raise the banner you drop because they believe in you. Faith overcomes every obstacle. She is able to defeat everything - money, power, power, political advantage and brute force.
History can give people faith. If your story inspires the audience, if they come to the same conclusions as you, if they make your story his, you can consider that you managed to get through to them. Further influence will not require much effort - it will grow on its own as people retell your story to others.
It doesn't matter what form your story takes, whether it's visual, proven throughout your life, or whether you put it into words. The main thing is that she answers one single question: can you be trusted? Skip's story shows that even multimillionaires can have influence problems. If influence were a simple derivative of power and money, then Skip would have no difficulty, since he has both. However, there are times when power and wealth turn into a disadvantage.
Isn't Skip's act a clever manipulation? Maybe. But it will immediately be revealed as soon as he stops. As soon as the manipulator stops weaving his web, it inevitably begins to break. Manipulation (that is, the desire to make people believe in a false story) is the most primitive form of influence. There are much more powerful sources of influence available to any person with the most ordinary life experience. These sources are genuine, compelling stories.
We can divide the stories that will help you achieve influence into six types. Here they are:
1. Stories like "Who am I"
2. Stories that explain "Why I'm here"
3. Stories about "vision"
4. Instructive stories
5. Stories Demonstrating Values ​​in Action
6. Stories that say "I know what you're thinking"
The first thing people you want to influence is asking themselves two questions: “Who is he?” and "Why is he here?" Until they get answers to these questions, not a single word of your faith will be. The shareholders that Skip sought to influence were, above all, eager to understand who he was. At first, they decided that before them was another heir to a large fortune, who decided to play a tough businessman. And Skip had to replace the "We can't trust this man" story that shareholders had already told themselves with a new story that gave them confidence in him.
Skip could say, "Yes, I'm rich, I'm young, and I just bought a majority stake in your company, but don't worry... I'm not an arrogant know-it-all." Formally, these words have the same essence as the story he told. But there is a huge difference between the effect of a story and the effect of a simple statement: "I can be trusted."
Before you try to influence someone, convey your “message”, “vision” of the problem, you will have to inspire trust among your interlocutors. A statement like “I am a good person (smart, moral, tactful, influential, informed, resourceful, successful – take your pick) and therefore worthy of your trust” is likely to arouse suspicion. People have to come to this conclusion themselves. But there is usually not enough time to build experiential trust, and the best thing you can do is tell a story. History is the only way to show who you are. Other ways - persuasion, bribery, or fiery appeals - are the essence of nudge strategies. Storytelling is an attraction strategy. If the story is good enough, then people will of their own free will come to the conclusion that you and your words can be trusted.

So what do you want to talk about?

So, we already understood that before people allow themselves to be influenced, they will want to know who you are and what you are here for. If you don't tell, people will do it for you, and their opinion will almost certainly not be in your favor. Such is human nature: people are sure that those who seek influence expect to extract some benefit for themselves. At the same time, they are initially convinced that they want to receive this benefit at their expense. I repeat, this is human nature. Therefore, you will have to tell your story in such a way that everyone understands that this person can be trusted. Stories can be different - depending on the situation. Imagine an extreme scenario: a “green” hooligan is desperately trying to get into a street gang. The “oldies” will surely believe him if he tells them a true story about how he stole something somewhere (or did something else like that). I know that getting into a street gang is not your plan, so you will have to tell stories that confirm your high morals or, if you are going into business, your ability to do business. Any stories that have meaning and meaning to the listeners, but at the same time give them the opportunity to understand what kind of person you are, will work.
Think of people who have ever tried to influence you, be it a leader, a colleague, a salesperson, a volunteer activist, a preacher, a consultant. Remember which of them succeeded and which failed. Did you agree with them because they managed to influence you, or did they influence you because you initially agreed with them? Why did you believe one and not the other? It was probably important for you to understand what kind of people they are and what benefits they want to derive from cooperation with you. And no matter how much they talk about the benefits “for you personally”, about your potential interest, no matter what arguments and rationale they give, in fact, you still passed every word through a trust filter based on your own judgment about who is speaking and why is it said.
A consultant who sells an idea will waste time extolling its merits if he fails to connect with listeners from the very beginning. Most often, his audience is firmly convinced that all consultants are more interested in paying for their services than in the success of their clients, and will not listen to what they are broadcasting until they encounter an honest specialist, for whom business comes first, and fees secondary. The new chairman of some public committee should not move on to the agenda before the members of the committee stop looking at him as another benefactor of humanity and a politically engaged careerist. A priest who does not empathize with people will not be able to guide anyone on the path of love and forgiveness. The impassioned calls of the quality manager to improve customer service will not lead to anything if employees believe that "this guy does not understand anything in real life."
According to a survey conducted several years ago by the New York Times and CBS News, sixty-three percent of respondents believe that they should be as careful as possible in dealing with others, and the remaining thirty-seven percent believe that "most people will try to use them at the first opportunity. for your own benefit." It is hardly worth doubting the reliability of these data. Therefore, your first task is to try to convince people that you can be trusted. How to do it? The answer is in the survey results themselves. Respondents stated that 85 percent of the people they knew could be expected to be honest and sincere. Well well! Is it really that simple? Let people know who you are, help them feel they know you, and their trust in you will automatically triple. Remember the common phrases: “He is a normal man, I know him” or “It’s not that I don’t trust her, I just don’t know her.”
How can we expect people to trust and be willing to succumb to our influence if they don't know who we are? When communicating, we spend too much energy on referring to the “rational” half of the brain, forgetting about the “emotional” half. But she does not tolerate neglect. The “emotional half” does not perceive rational evidence, it lives according to the principle “God saves the safe” and never loses its vigilance.

Stories on the theme "Who am I"

We already know that the first question people ask when they realize that you want to influence them is “Who is he?” Naturally, you want to make a certain impression about you. For example, if you make me laugh, then I will immediately conclude that you are not a bore, calm down and start listening to you. However, if you start your speech with "I am a very interesting person," then I will look around for a way out. That is, you must show who you are, not to tell then you will be more likely to believe.
Even experienced speakers are always subjected to a difficult test. I recently had the pleasure of listening to Robert Cooper, author of Executive EQ. He had to speak to an audience of nine hundred people. The public greeted him as "another consultant" who had written some kind of book. Arms crossed on the chest, skeptical glances - everything indicated that the listeners suspected him of another clown who would begin to broadcast about the importance of "emancipation of emotions" or begin to tell things obvious to everyone. However, the story with which he began his speech answered unspoken questions, confirmed his sincerity, and in such a way that all nine hundred people understood who he was, what he believed in and why.
Robert talked about his grandfather. Grandpa suffered four heart attacks and died of a fifth when Robert was sixteen. Despite poor health, the grandfather spared no effort for long conversations with his grandson, he generously shared his rich life experience. We listened to this story, and Robert's love for his grandfather was transmitted to us, we saw him through the eyes of a loving teenager. “If a person’s mind were judged by the expressiveness of his gaze, then, I’m not afraid to say, my grandfather would be recognized as a genius.” Robert told us about the disease that was slowly killing his grandfather. He told how, after each heart attack, he called his grandson to his place to share his thoughts, and the guy understood that each such meeting could be the last. Grandfather usually began with the words: “I kept thinking about what is the most important thing in life, and I realized: the most important thing is ...” We listened as if spellbound. We wanted to know what was the insight of this extraordinary man. After each attack, the “most important thing” changed, and Robert cheered us up by confessing his then-teenage fears: he was afraid that his grandfather would ask what was the most important thing after the last heart attack.
We were still smiling when Robert revealed to us the old man's last words: “Grandfather said: give the world all the best that you have, and this best will return to you. Then he added: I keep asking myself, why didn’t I think every day about what is best in me? How much good could then come back to me... To your father... To you. But it won't come back, because now it's too late for me... But not for you. We held our breath as we felt the tragic force of the regrets of a man standing on the edge of a grave. "Too late for me." We are all human and we will all die someday. Each of those present in the hall suddenly realized that the end awaited him and possible regret about the missed opportunity to do good. Robert did not push or force us to do anything, but his eyes shone with such sincerity that we understood that he had the right to tell us his story. Only complete cynics could now doubt that Robert Cooper could be trusted.
These personal stories help others to truly see who you really are. They allow you to show yourself from a side that sometimes remains unknown even to the closest.
But there are many other ways to show listeners "who you are."
You don't have to tell a story from your own life to do this. In this book you will find parables, fables, tales, cases from the life of great people. Any story is good, as long as you can tell it in a way that reveals the essence of your personality.
If the story speaks of self-sacrifice, we believe that the narrator knows how to combine his interest with sincere compassion and willingness to help. If, after listening to a story, we understand that the one who told it is able to admit his mistakes and shortcomings, this means that in difficult situations he will not hide behind the denial of the obvious, but will honestly try to correct the situation.

Annette Simmons is a professional storyteller who teaches this art to business people, the head of Group Process Consulting, a communications consultant, and the author of several books.

Complexity of presentation

The target audience

Those who want to stand out in public, find interesting stories and practice storytelling, as well as those who want to learn how to convince colleagues, partners and clients.

The book describes six types of stories to suit different circumstances and audiences. The author talks about the power of gaining the trust of listeners through the depth of stories, explains why storytelling can be a stronger and more effective tool than facts or figures. She also describes the types of "problem" listeners who are the least amenable to influence.

Reading together

People do not need new information, but faith in themselves, personal goals and success. Making people do something does not mean having influence over them. Real influence starts when people start believing in us and our stories, which they love to make personal. Then further influence will not require much effort, as listeners will begin to retell our story to others.

A great story gives people the opportunity to interpret the facts so that the big picture is visible. What they don't believe or don't understand begins to matter because of the experience of others embedded in the story. Good storytelling is an art that helps convince others and give meaning to their lives. Such a story makes the world simpler and more understandable for us, offers a plot that we will follow and build thoughts. We can learn to recognize the essence of personal experiences and problems, whether it be parting with a loved one or losing a job. Such semantic narratives are more effective than just advice, although they act as an indirect way of conveying a point of view.

Sometimes words are not enough to tell a compelling story, so the body can be involved. After all, we want not only to tell a dry story, but also to play with our face, voice, gestures, which makes our story a story of a new level. For complete immersion, what we talk about is no less important, emotional memories have a rather powerful effect on the listener. You can also connect irrelevant, but very specific details.

The story should reflect the long-term goal to which we are going, it is important to talk about inspiring moments here. History always carries a certain value, its purpose is transferred to real actions. A very effective way is to convey the story in such a way that we read the thoughts of our listeners, then they will feel more at ease.

Stories have an incredible power to relax the audience:

1. They help to eliminate all suspicions when we take the side of the listeners and combine our mutual interests. Then it is easier for people to trust us.
2. Stories are an excellent tool for approaching the audience, as if we have known our listeners for many years.
3. We can use the knowledge of how people relax and listen to us almost as if under hypnosis. A good story stays in the head for a long time, and the listeners will no longer be sure whether it really happened or they heard it somewhere. History is able to influence human actions as if all this happened to people in reality.

If you don't think that the audience is indifferent to stories, you can influence them by understanding the reasons why listeners have an opinion different from ours. We must always be friendly and positive so that only positive emotions are reflected in the story. Then people will hope and believe. But if the listeners are negative, you need to tell them about some points focused on this problem. Humans are capable of producing six reactions of resistance to any narrative: cynicism, resentment, envy, hopelessness, apathy, greed. To drive out these defensive reactions, you need to tell people stories worthy of their trust.

People can be inspired by listening to their stories and engaging in sincere dialogue with them. Then it will be possible to understand not only their arguments, but also the real feelings that they reveal to us. Sometimes the best way to influence the other person is to simply listen to what they have to say. A person will be just as polite towards us, having already tuned in to our personal history.

There are a few slippery moments that can ruin any story. To avoid this, remember the three "not":

1. Do not show superiority to people in order not to look like a guru to them who does not respect anyone. Then there is a chance to win a wider audience who can think for themselves. It is easier to show the listeners personal sympathy for them and to become closer to them through experience or common interests.

2. You can't make people bored by telling very long and pointless stories. Any of us always has something to tell, you just need to connect what is interesting to people with what is interesting in us and our history. It is important here to stick to specific details, to shut up in time, and also to be able to puzzle the listeners.

3. Initially, you need to direct the content to the audience, share highlights, but not instill people with a sense of fear or guilt. Any negative emotions can turn listeners against us, badly influencing specific changes. Even a powerful story ceases to be effective as soon as we go too far with negative emotions. Therefore, only a positive charge allows people to change their minds in the long run.

Telling something, we not only change our outlook on life, but also bear responsibility for the development of the plot. If our story is filled with feelings and stress, we need to rewrite the story and make it more positive. If the story is good and enjoyable to live in, we begin to see the problems differently. The same applies to relationships with people because our stories affect their lives. Don't underestimate our power and responsibility as storytellers.

We should learn to think not only critically, but also in terms of the stories themselves - the author calls this "storyteller thinking" when we describe situations or problems in the form of stories. In any problem, first of all, you need to get rid of uncertainty, humor and emotions. On the other hand, you can forget about the rules and include emotions that are important when telling a story, then it will become even better. Rules are not as useful as individual cases.

We perceive the world through the prism of subjectivity, and that is why listeners believe us, because we narrate freely and sincerely. The storyteller's mindset helps boost creativity and imagination.

Best Quote

“The habit of focusing on results helps to master the market, reduce costs and increase profits. But this habit will never make you a great storyteller."

What does the book teach

Storytelling helps to reach out to any audience in order to inspire them to take concrete actions. Stories can change the lives of others by 180 degrees.

Only emotions can make people laugh, cry, dream. No objective thinking can do this.

A story can become compelling and moving when we learn to abandon critical thinking and begin to tell from a subjective point of view, demonstrating a vividness of perception.

Editorial

Even if you do not plan to become a great writer, nothing will stop you from writing down your stories. This lesson not only helps to relieve stress, deal with your emotions and put thoughts in your head on the shelves, but also to master the "thinking of the storyteller." What is bibliotherapy and how to apply it, says a psychologist Anna Kutyavina: .

It is sometimes difficult for a shy person to say even a couple of phrases in public, especially to decide on a long story. Psychologist Yaroslav Voznyuk knows how to turn shyness into confidence, and offers seven ways to overcome shyness: .

What to do so that with age there are no problems with thinking and speech? Expert in the field of effective learning technologies, lecturer Nina Shevchuk explains that our cognitive base needs to be trained and strengthened, and suggests some useful exercises: .