www.adme.ru

How do I know if a man is lying to me?

How to understand that a man is lying, and why does he do it? If he lies by correspondence, talking on the phone, how to find the reasons for this lie?

Men often lie to their wives and lovers, and each time it happens from some specific motives. Consider that unique case where an ex-husband continues to lie even after divorcing his wife. What could be the reasons for lying when it's all over anyway, and in general how to understand that a man is lying?

A man who often lies, lives in fear, not life. Aishek Noram

Many men tell lies to their women, not seeing anything shameful and offensive in this. Gradually, this becomes a tradition for them and sometimes happens unconsciously. At the same time, a man not only lies about his feelings, but also about many other things. Among the main reasons for this phenomenon, psychologists indicate the following:

• the desire to appear better than it is;
• desire to avoid conflict;
• the desire to protect a woman from unnecessary experiences;
• unwillingness to discuss serious issues.

In most cases, with the help of lies, without quarrels and scandals, but as if in a “peaceful” way, a man wins back space for those actions that will obviously not be approved by a woman. It can be a relationship with a mistress, drinking, meeting friends. The most understandable version of male lies, when a man lies and cheats. At the same time, if it is difficult for him to lie directly to his eyes, a sparing option is used and he lies in correspondence. We also recommend reading the article: What to do if the husband constantly lies? And this man, who is used to lying to his wife, gets divorced. Contrary to the prevailing opinion that divorce is more difficult for women, the psychology of family relations says the opposite. In our society, it is customary to give all sympathy on this occasion to the representatives of the weaker sex, and men, on the contrary, to blame for what happened. But it should be taken into account that men cannot afford to grieve openly, they have to carry all the experiences in themselves, which is doubly difficult. During this period, they experience such feelings as:

• feeling of loss;
• loneliness;
• mental pain;
• bitterness for lost years;
• disappointment.

A man has to push negative emotions deep inside, and others lie to him that everything is fine with him, which results in depression, alcoholism and somatic diseases. If communication has been preserved between the spouses, then the habit of lying remains, only the motivation for this is already different. An attentive, albeit ex-wife, will easily understand that the ex-husband is lying, by facial expressions, gestures and intonation. Relations a long time ago have already been clarified, claims have been made, the divorce has taken place. Despite this, the husband continues to lie. How to understand that a man is lying and why he does it? Remembering the main reasons for male lies and the state of a man after a divorce, we can conclude that the goals of deception are changing somewhat. The main ones now include:

• unwillingness to look weak;
• intention to hide real feelings;
• the desire to avoid manipulation by the ex-wife;
• the desire to justify oneself in the eyes of children;
• the desire to completely avoid communication.

A divorced man often lies about the feelings that he actually experiences, tries to show that he is doing well. But sometimes the most common laziness and lack of female control make you forget about your promises. For example, an ex-husband lies on the phone that he would like to take the children to the zoo, but does not come to them at the appointed time. In many cases, after a divorce, a man tries to break off relations with his former family. This usually happens when the husband is the initiator of the separation. He is burdened by constant quarrels and an eternally dissatisfied wife. He gets divorced in order to gain freedom and does not want to hear anything about his ex-wife. Resentment against his wife also interferes with communication with children, while he either lies or does not speak to anyone at all. Often, after a divorce, men go to their mistresses, now devoting all their time and energy to building new relationships and a new family. This is another reason why ex-husbands do not communicate with their former families, they simply have no time. When a man says to a woman: “You are my only one”, girls, you know, he is lying! Even if a man has the most beautiful woman, he still looks left. Still looking. It's in our nature. How would I explain it to you so as not to offend anyone ... In short, even if you spend your whole life relaxing in the Maldives, you still want to hunt for a day fishing in Astrakhan. If you eat marbled beef, anyway, once a year, up, and fell for dumplings. Then, of course, you will regret it, but you ate. And when I ate, I liked it.

Pavel Volya

Another reason forcing men to break off relations with their ex-wives and children is ordinary employment. After all, they now have a different way of life, they themselves must manage to do all the things both at home and at work. Women always feel deceit on the part of a man, although they cannot always prove it with facts. In some cases, they strive to know the truth at all costs, because sometimes it is really vital. Therefore, they are constantly tormented by the question of how to understand if a man is lying to them? Although female intuition rarely fails, the desire to blindly believe in the best sometimes prevents you from admitting that you are being deceived. There are a number of reliable signs that you need to know if there is a suspicion of a lie.

It can be unmistakably understood that a man is lying by gestures, speech, and a defensive position during a conversation. A person who tells a lie, when gesticulating, is characterized by the following features:

• fussiness;
• avoidance of eye contact;
• anxiety;
• uncertainty in movement.

The speech of a liar also has some characteristic features, it is usually accompanied by:

• hard breath;
• yawn;
• blinking;
• nervous cough.

The fact that someone is telling a lie is also evidenced by the fact that during a conversation he unconsciously builds a barrier between himself and the lady. In this case, any foreign objects are used - cups, books, fruits. The liar tries to get out of direct view by leaning on the table or the back of a nearby chair. Do not try to make sure that the man is lying to you by correspondence on the Internet or by reading his SMS on the phone. It is better to carefully observe him and in the presence of these signs, analyze his behavior and draw appropriate conclusions.

Thus, each of the situations must be considered separately. It is impossible to give a definite and clear answer why a man is lying and does not want to keep in touch with his ex-wife. As you can see, he may have a variety of reasons for this, which are worth thinking about. To clarify them, it is necessary to consider each specific case separately, taking into account all the smallest details of the situation that has arisen.

About the article: Word count: 1013 Reading time: 5 min. Thanks to the authors for the article, which has already been read 19,560 times! Thanks to our readers who left 3 comments and have already rated the article 9 times!

Rate it too:

psymod.ru

How to understand that a person is lying in correspondence

Every day, each of us utters at least one word of lies. And it is worth coming to terms with this - it has always been, is and will certainly be so, if the current century can be considered an indicator. But at the same time, people do not like being lied to. They begin to look for any opportunity to get to the bottom of the truth, even if it is not needed.

After all, that's why the best way to make an issue as interesting to the public as possible is to classify everything connected with it. And in this article we will tell you about the main secret of the universe - how to determine the lies of others and successfully lie yourself.

How to develop intuition against lies?

Developing it is quite simple - you first need to believe in it, and then gain experience. In order to believe in intuition, accept for yourself one simple fact: "You can know something without even being able to explain how you know it." For example, you know for sure that 2x2=4, but not everyone can prove it. Accepted? Fine.

Then how to understand that a person is lying, the psychology of this situation is right, he will give himself away. To gain experience, you need two things - observation and constant communication with people. Observations can be taken both from specialized books (the “Psychology of Lies” is quite good, but the material of other schools is also worth reading), and from your own experience, and constant communication is necessary in order to be able to observe them and try to determine when they lie.

After a couple of years of conscious observation, your intuition will be able to tell you on a consistent basis with ease.

https://miaset.com/psychology/help/lying.html

How to understand that a person is lying by correspondence VKontakte

To be honest, no way. Especially if this person is unfamiliar to you or you do not know about the features of his life.

It is on this that many plans of various scammers are built, pretending to correspond with busty beauties, lustful millionaires and good-natured Nigerian princes.

However, just VKontakte you have the opportunity to somehow track the progress of the dialogue, so if you have an aggravation of paranoia, let's try to formulate several ways to define such a lie.

1. Timing. Watch the frequency of the interlocutor's messages, especially in a casual conversation. If suddenly, after an important question, there is an unreasonable pause - most likely, someone does not want to tell the truth and is currently trying to build a usable lie.

   On the other hand, he could simply move away from the computer for a while or be distracted by another activity, so the gap in timing is not yet proof. Just a reason to be concerned.

2. Refusal to go into details. Again, not real proof, but if the interlocutor mentions some dubious fact and at the same time refuses to tell more about it, most likely they are trying to decorate your ears with pasta.

   On the other hand, the topic may just turn out to be really painful, and you can greatly offend the person by trying to find out more about it.

On this, in general, everything. As we have already said, it is almost impossible to accurately determine a lie only by correspondence.

How to hide your lies?

Actually, it's quite simple. You "only" believe in it yourself, at least for a couple of minutes, and then neither your eyes, nor your hands, nor your face will give you away. Maybe they will be able to convict you of a lie after checking your statement, but believe me - the reason for this check will clearly not be your behavior during the conversation.

In order to believe your lie, you need to carefully think it up. Think about the whole situation you want to present, or better yet, create a fantasy in which you put yourself in it and think about what your decisions will be. The more carefully and closer to reality you can think through a lie, the better. Now you should repeat it to yourself so many times so that you yourself believe in it, so that you have formed, as it were, two memories of one event - the present and ... one more present. This is tricky and can take hours or even days, but if you really need to hide something, this is the best way.

Another option is to meticulously study those same lie detection factors and practice for a long time, persistently, in order not to activate the triggers described in them in any case.

It will take you several months or even years, but after that you will be able to skillfully lie on the go, and your body language will seem normal to most people.

What are the emotions associated with lying?

Differently. The most common is confusion, especially if a person is forced to lie to someone / she loves. However, there is often anger, especially if the interlocutor is trying to unravel the tangle of lies and you have to urgently distract him from this process. But the emotion with which it is very difficult to lie is tenderness. If you don’t know how to understand by the eyes that a person is lying, then pay attention to gestures and facial expressions.

It is also impossible to lie when you are angry. However, if a liar has been taught to control emotions, then he can simply accurately depict them, remaining inside extremely calm and collected.

Who lies more often men or women?

Who is stronger - an elephant or a whale? That's it. Everyone lies, and they lie all the time, regardless of gender or age. Even little kids who don't even go to school yet are already trying to learn the art of deception... and it's quite a cute sight.

But, if we generalize the situation, we will get something like the following - men more often lie about events or actions (“Guys, I caught such a fish yesterday!!!”), and women about the emotions they experience (“Well what are you, Lisa, I’m not at all angry because you came to this party in the same dress!”).

The overall frequency of lying depends only on how often they talk about these things and is strictly individual.

What occupations lie the most?

Politicians, no questions asked. Right behind them are journalists, followed by media producers. All these professions are tied to promises and / or personal interpretation of information, and that is why their representatives consciously sin against absolute truth. Also, weather forecasters lie a lot, but this is no longer their fault, but their equipment - it is still imperfect.

• ➤ Nothing is lost - how to send correctly, you can learn a lot of interesting things thanks to this post.
• ➤ You may not know this, how a bewitched man behaves - in the record, also study other good ideas in the magazine.
• ➤ We covered almost all the questions, more, how to clean suede boots at home from dust, we always have answers to all questions.
• ➤ Secret information for your own, how to delete SMS in Skype - here - there is always a way out in any situation.
• ➤ It is read in one breath, how can you learn a text quickly, you can read it when there is nothing to do.

Representatives of the most ancient profession lie on an ongoing basis ... but this, as it were, is even initially implied. Doctors lie to seriously ill patients, military men lie to those they protect, policemen lie to criminals, and criminals lie to police officers. As they say, everyone lies. And if the top three of this peculiar TOP can still be somehow determined, then the rest of the places are strictly individual.

miaset.com

How to understand that a man is lying

The article presents frequent questions and answers to them about relationships with men, in which it is not always possible to achieve the truth from each of the parties. Write about your situation in the comments to get good advice.

How to understand that a guy is lying in correspondence with a girl if he deceives well

Such behavior can be suspected in small things. Read carefully, match the facts, if he is lying, sooner or later it will become noticeable.

How to understand that a guy is lying about love and his feelings, cheating at a distance, on the phone

The tongue can lie, but the eyes cannot. When he talks about love, watch his eyes, gestures.

You can find out if a guy is cheating at a distance or not by his behavior. He's going to get too emotional for no reason. There will be moments when, out of duty, he does not pick up the phone, does not answer messages.

Perhaps, knowledge that will decipher and tell us how to understand that a person is lying is useful to everyone today. It's easy if learn a few secrets and be able to use them.

Psychology will put everything in its place, and gestures, facial expressions, phrases and looks will help you find out that a person is lying.

Nobody is immune from lies. Some people lie in small things, trying to reveal only half-truths, for some, lying is a hobby, and for some, it’s a habit. But there is a category of people for whom lying has become a profession and each of us can be in the place of the victim of such a liar.

How can you protect yourself from lies and determine that a person is lying? Help to figure it out advice from psychologists capable of analyzing human behavior and revealing the main signs of a lie.

1. Minimum gestures. People who talk from the bottom of their hearts are always emotional. They gesticulate, trying to draw attention to their problem. The gestures of the liar are minimal, he keeps them under control and uses them only unconsciously. It is the subconscious signals that help us to know that a person is lying.
2. When a person lies, he trying to cover his face with his hands: often touches the forehead, lips or nose.
3. You can recognize a liar by his look - he tries not to make eye contact, his pupils are constricted. A liar blinks very rarely and rarely fixes his eyes on one point.
4. The person who tells lies keeps a closed posture: crosses his arms over his chest or hugs himself a little.
5. If a person is not used to lying, he maybe a little nervous, fiddling with a pen, sheet of paper or any other object. But this also happens with people who are insecure.
6. Interlocutor who lies can take a short break in the conversation: cough or drink water.

In fact, it is sometimes very difficult or almost impossible to determine that a person is lying. Some people are so believe in their lies that they are very difficult to convict with the help of gestures and facial expressions. Such individuals lie all the time, a lie for them is a certain way of life or even a disease. But even here there are a couple of secrets to recognize whether a person is telling the truth or not.

If a person keeps repeating phrases like“I never lie” or “Have I ever lied to you?” means he wants to hide the truth.

If your interlocutor does not have a phenomenal memory, then after a while he will forget the details about which he lied. He will repeat a well-thought-out lie to the smallest detail, but specific questions will certainly unbalance him. Ask to describe the situation in more detail or specify the circumstances under which it occurred. Usually liars begin to get confused in the details or come up with ridiculous situations.

Sometimes, during such checks, a person can behave aggressively or vice versa, wants to arouse pity in the interlocutor or win him over. In such conversations a liar often tries to change the subject or answer a question with a question. Try to play by the rules of the interlocutor and take the conversation in a different direction. You will notice that the person has relaxed, calmed down and does not intend to return to the exciting topic anymore.

Where does a person look when he lies?

We promised to tell you how to understand that a person is lying in his eyes and where he is looking in this case. Many people gives a look, they may even look you in the eye, but they continue to lie.

When a person speaks the truth, his gaze is directed inward, as if into himself. He speaks in a measured tone, his lips pursed. Liar, on the other hand, looks up and into the distance as if contemplating a non-existent object. He speaks too fast or, on the contrary, too slowly. It can also betray the deceiver gaze to the right.

Thinking up a situation, a person can slightly turn his head to the right and look up. At the same time, he, as it were, imperceptibly tries to look at the interlocutor, studying his reaction.

How to understand that a person is lying to you by correspondence?

It happens that we cannot establish visual contact with the interlocutor. And here there are a couple of tricks. When a person is far away, he relaxes and can use words that will certainly give him away.

There is one revealing story of how a girl exposed her boyfriend in a lie after reading his message. The guy wrote to his girlfriend something like this message: "I'm at home, and I'll be there until the evening." After reading it, the girl realized that she was being deceived. After all, if her beloved was really at home, he would write "here" and not "there." So, people are betrayed by carelessly spoken phrases. It is important to learn to read between the lines and catch such inconsistencies.

All people lie without exception, only the regularity and scale of lies differ. One person will tell Mom that he was late at the store, casually silent about a minor accident on the way home, and the other will tell a long and fascinating story, made up from beginning to end. And yet in some situations it is almost vital to know the truth. How to understand that people are lying, and bring them to clean water?

Important Features

If you really want to get to the bottom of the truth, get ready to watch and listen carefully. It is important to evaluate what and how your interlocutor says. But not only words matter, pay attention to gestures, facial expressions and postures. Only the presence of several signs of a lie will help to avoid mistakes. How to understand if a person is lying? This is not always easy, if you have a real lie specialist in front of you, he can hide all the signs with sufficient quality and behave quite naturally, telling a lie. And yet, some little thing will definitely give it away. But inexperienced liars are quite easy to recognize.

What will the face say?

Even if a person holds himself confidently, with a false story, he will still be excited. Note that liars rarely make eye contact. However, the movements of the eyeballs can be controlled. How to understand whether a person is lying or not, if he looks into his eyes? Due to the release of adrenaline into the blood, the pupils will be dilated. However, this sign is rather indirect, since it can be observed with pleasant emotions or due to the peculiarities of the lighting in the room. Another evidence of lies - often blinking, even deliberate deception - this is a serious stress to which the body will definitely respond. Some liars are automatic but, of course, this action cannot be considered as a 100% symptom of untruth either.

Sign language

A person who tells the truth should be calm and relaxed if there is an unreasonable increase in sweating, redness, or pallor. skin- there is reason to doubt the honesty of the interlocutor. When excited, many automatically fiddle with an object in their hands or straighten their clothes too often. How to understand that people are lying? There is nothing easier - see if the person's leg is twitching, or maybe he is beating some kind of rhythm with his fingers? Some experts claim that lying provokes a completely physical itch in the neck and lower face. And this means that a liar during his story will scratch this area, pull his chin or straighten his shirt collar. Another typical sign of untruth is the desire to cover your mouth with your hand, as if the speaker is ashamed of his words.

Methods for determining falsehood

We have all seen spy movies in which they love to demonstrate a lie detector. Such devices exist in reality. During their work, they evaluate the body's non-verbal responses during responses or narration. And yet their results cannot be considered one hundred percent. To the question: “How to understand that people are lying?” Experts answer that it makes sense to try specialized pharmacological preparations or hypnosis. In practice, experienced psychologists with the help of these tools can not only reveal the untruth, but also get to the bottom of the truth. A similar method can be tried in everyday life. Create the most comfortable conditions for the interlocutor - offer him delicious food, relaxing tea or alcohol. Try to win sympathy in the same way, and your chances of finding out the truth will increase significantly. But hypnosis and “pills of truth” are not recommended for non-professionals. However, drugs that suppress the will, you are unlikely to find in a regular pharmacy.

The abundance of minor trifles and details in the story may indicate the speaker's desire to distract from the main problem. Liars love to completely translate the topic. This technique can be used against them. Offer to talk about something else on your own. The interlocutor should not have obvious relief and joy at such a turn in the conversation. a person telling a lie, you can, specifying the details. It is advisable to do this after a while. Go back a few sentences and casually ask, “So how do you say you got there?” or "And why things went that way - I did not understand." The answer will most likely be received, but it will also take some time to think it over, and it will not be possible to hide such confusion. You already know how to understand if a person is lying on him, but you can additionally use a simple exercise. Memorize the whole story in detail or even record it on a voice recorder. Later return to this conversation and ask to tell again. Obvious differences in the reproduction of the same story is a clear sign of untruth. You can go the other way, after completing the story, ask to retell everything again, but backwards - from the result and end of the story, to its very beginning. But keep in mind, this will only work with your absolute memory. In addition, even when identifying differences in the story, the liar will try to convince you that the first time you listened to him inattentively or misunderstood. If you suspect a lie, also try asking definitive questions that can only be answered with “yes” or “no”. Liars are usually bad at specifics, the answers will be slow, labored, and the excitement will increase.

How to understand if a person is lying by correspondence?

All the above signs and tips are most suitable for personal communication. And how to calculate a liar during correspondence? You can try some of the tips from the previous paragraph, but keep in mind that even instant real-time chat gives you a few seconds to think. In virtual communication, we will only have to evaluate words and phrases. Firstly, extra assurances of the veracity of what was said should alert. If your interlocutor used “I’m telling the truth” several times, “Have I ever lied?” or “if you don’t want it, don’t believe it!” before you reproached him for lying, then there is reason to doubt. Beware if the letter is too emotional - with an abundance of exclamation points and text highlights.

At the level of speech, longer pauses are possible when answering a question, an excessively loud timbre of the voice, a change in pace from fast to slow, and the absence of logically constructed statements. You can also immediately recognize a lie if the interlocutor begins to praise you for no reason and tries to divert the conversation in a different direction.

The purpose of this behavior tactic is to divert attention by any means and make you automatically change the topic of conversation. Vigilance and constant monitoring of a partner will quickly bring a person to clean water. At the same time, do not hesitate to show that you suspect the interlocutor of deceit. Feeling something was wrong, the liar will either stop the dialogue, or retreat on his own.

Hidden signs

The behavior of a person who lies can be understood by gestures and facial expressions. Frequent touching of the face, nose, lips, looking away, scratching the nose, massaging the earlobe - all this indicates dishonesty of the partner. Additional signals are crossed arms and legs in a sitting position, excessive tension, a desire to turn away, fingering any object or strand of hair.

As a rule, all of the above symptoms appear in combination. Additionally, you can notice behavior that is inadequate for a person and the desire to end the conversation faster. Try changing the topic of the conversation to the opposite. If the partner does this quickly and with pleasure, then you should think about it. Do not forget to trust your intuition, which will tell you for sure that the interlocutor is deceiving.

Guys, we put our soul into the site. Thanks for that
for discovering this beauty. Thanks for the inspiration and goosebumps.
Join us at Facebook and In contact with

People think that when communicating remotely, lying, as well as telling the truth, is much easier. In correspondence, you do not need to look the interlocutor in the eye, he does not see your facial expression, your confusion or fear. You can not answer right away, think carefully about your words and decide what is better to write.

And although all this gives some odds, the liar often pierces.

website gives a list of tricks that can signal that you are being deceived. Study them all so no one can fool you.

1. Long sentences

The deceiver subconsciously tries to hide the lie in the mass of the text. A Cornell University study confirmed that a false sentence is usually longer than a true one. When subjects had to lie, all of their sentences became longer, on average, by one word.

2. Introductory words

In order not to speak directly and categorically, the deceiver will use words denoting uncertainty and probability. Most likely, he simply does not want you to be offended, but he also does not want to fulfill your request. Therefore Yulit. During the study, women who had to lie often used variations of the words “maybe”, “try”, “I”. Interestingly, scientists did not find any special differences in the vocabulary of the male subjects.

3. Repetition of information

The main task of a liar is to convince you. In war, all means are good, so he can repeat his lies over and over again until you believe. No wonder they say: "A lie repeated a thousand times becomes the truth." Be careful and don't let yourself be fooled so easily.

4. Reply delay

If the interlocutor does not answer your question for a long time, who knows, maybe he is busy or does not see the message. But sometimes it can signal that he needs time to come up with an answer. Or the deceiver may feel pangs of conscience and doubt, tell the truth or lie.

5. Long typing

If your interlocutor has never been distinguished by eloquence and love for editing, then this may alert. Most likely, he corrects his answer to make it sound convincing.

6. No response

Silence is also a kind of lie. In written communication, avoiding an answer is much easier than talking face to face. You can just log out of the social network. Or you can change the topic or return to the previous conversation, hoping that in the flow of information the lack of an answer to a direct question will go unnoticed at least for a while.

7. Pressure on the conscience

Man is a very vulnerable creature. Detractors can shamelessly play on our feelings. Some liars do this to make us feel guilty and stop asking uncomfortable questions. They often succeed, and you instantly become guilty from the right. Don't be fooled and track these moments.

8. Translation of arrows

This is also a kind of way to play on our emotions. In this case, the liar begins to control the situation. He asks us questions and makes us justify and explain our words. That's why all good journalists never answer the questions of the people they interview, because it's a way to divert their attention.