In this age, it is very difficult to prioritize, because the number of possibilities is amazing. People see dozens of opportunities and fail at a few significant goals. Therefore, learning to prioritize correctly is extremely important, it affects our destiny and success in life.

Surely each of us had it so that at the end of the day we understood that we were only doing what we were reacting to external stimuli, were constantly distracted by the insignificant and did not move a single step towards our own. Days turn into weeks, months and years. Some people have no purpose or priorities, so they float through life and take on any option that comes their way. This leads to dissatisfaction, and broken dreams.

Think about whether the day is going the way you want. Or maybe you are just reacting to what is happening to you and not being able to decide what exactly you want? If so, then here are three tips for you to help you take control of your life and every single day in it.

Work not for the number of tasks completed

Many people make a to-do list that contains dozens of items. And even if they manage to complete most of them, at the end of the day there is no feeling that the day was useful. Often such lists are made just for the sake of being busy all the time and at the same time none of them is anything significant or global. On such days there is a lot of fuss, but not enough work for your life itself. Important life actions and decisions are replaced by aimless actions; they do not lead to a common result. Think about whether there is a structure in your affairs, whether they lead to something more than an attempt to patch up problems that arise.

These are two completely different types of thinking - to react to what life offers or to make life react to your decisions. The first is always easier and this is the trap of automatism. The second is more difficult, it is the desire to live consciously and stay ahead of many problems that may arise. Easier doesn't always mean better. It is important to fill the day with activities that are significant steps for your future. This is the difference between response to stimuli and progress. The first is like a hole in your boat from which you are constantly pouring water with a bucket, the second means inspecting the boat before sailing, a clear understanding of the place of arrival, awareness of the presence of pitfalls in specific waters and a journey with a full understanding of what and how to do.

So ask yourself two questions: “What activities will move me significantly towards my dream? What three things do I need to complete so that at the end of the day I understand that I did everything right and did not feel dissatisfied? Do the three most important things in one day, do them the right way. And then you can focus on the less important ones. And if at the end of the day you realize that you have not solved minor problems, this will not make you feel like a day spent aimlessly, because you have done the three most important things and it is by these criteria that you evaluate yourself.

Stop being distracted by unimportant things

The fact that today you have a new task does not mean that you should do it today and now. Of course, if it is not your job and not your responsibility. If you begin to notice how much time you spend per day on things that do not carry any value, you may be slightly surprised. And it is this time that can be directed to something more significant.

The danger is that once you perform some immediate meaningless action, you automatically begin to react to others. You start living on the system "Irritant - reaction" and you can not force yourself to stop, simply because it has become your habit.

To understand which things are not essential, use the first tip and identify the top three things that need to be done. All other things are secondary and if they can wait, they must wait their turn. It is very pleasant to do stupid things only when you have done the three main planned things. You feel like you deserve some relaxation.

You don't have to become completely selfish and take care of yourself, just learn to politely refuse people and let them know that you will help them only when you finish your business. The world is constantly sending out its requests and the art is to prioritize correctly and clearly understand which requests and when to respond. If a person asks you to help him, think about your family - that's who you should help in the first place, and not a person you may not know very well. Any external request is an irritant, no matter how it sounds. Any phone call or social media message (no matter how much you appreciate these people) is inherently an annoyance and nothing else. It can be pleasant, but it still distracts you from your priorities and goals.

Start planning your freedom

This is a very important skill that everyone should learn. If you have three important goals and you focus on them every day, do not forget that you need a little freedom. Emotional, physical, social, financial freedom will help you relax from any business and feel alive. It is extremely important to find time for such things, otherwise after a while any of your priorities will simply disappear because you are burnt out and you are not satisfied with such a boring pursuit of your dream.

Many people live with the feeling that they must suffer, sacrifice themselves and be miserable. It's a psychological problem, the victim syndrome. But even they are able to realize that it is not necessary to suffer every day, even if there are many things to be done. It is quite possible to be productive and at the same time relax, enjoy every minute of life. To do this, you need to learn how to plan your freedom, the freedom to do what you want and be filled with energy in order to move forward. If life is a series of tasks, this leads to very bad consequences, and you know which ones. Therefore, if you have clearly decided to prioritize, do not be fooled - you will not be able to do what you need 24 hours a day. You need a recharge and the simple pleasures of life. You can afford small weaknesses if you stick to your priorities. The reward system works great as long as it doesn't end up becoming a lifestyle. Everything should be in moderation, only this allows you to follow your dream and not go crazy along the way. We wish you good luck in this difficult but exciting business!

Elena Vetshtein

When is the table stable? Or how to prioritize?

In the life of every person there are four main components that, in the case of their optimal state, make a person happy. These are life priorities. The ability to correctly prioritize in life is like a talent. It allows a person to feel harmony. Life priorities can be compared to the legs of a table. On four equal legs, the table is most stable.

First and perhaps the most important component is the physical state, which is based on health, external attractiveness, vitality. All three components are closely related to each other. Poor health, low attractiveness, lack of vitality limit the ability to realize other components of a happy life. But this is not the only reason to put the physical condition of the body in the first place. Being born, man first of all learns to consciously control his body (coordinated work with arms and legs, hold his head, sit, crawl, walk). Work with the body is always the most understandable (obviousness of the relationship of action is the result). A person who does not know how to work with his body does not know how to manage himself! From a negligent attitude towards one's body, internal licentiousness, laziness, and disorganization grow!

As a rule, nature advances us, endowing us with a good physical condition at a young age. If a person’s priorities do not include proper work to keep the body in shape, and he treats it exclusively as a resource, over time the source begins to dry up. The first signs of a problem are manifested in lack, when it appears, apathy, unwillingness to act. Reduced chances to fully realize their own talents.

Self-realization- this is " second table leg". When a person realizes his abilities and talents, he is happy. Unrealized potential makes a person angry, envious, self-pitying and critical of others! Self-realization directly affects how self-sufficient a person feels. The non-self-sufficient always believes that the whole world owes him. A self-sufficient person builds partnerships with the world and other people.

Relationships are the third component happy life (third leg of the table).
Relationships built by a person depend on the harmony or disharmony of his inner world, his internal organization.

A self-sufficient person does not react to what is happening (does not get angry, does not get angry), but acts in accordance with changing circumstances. Realizing that each of us is guided by our own interests, we understand and accept the actions of other people. This helps not to experience anger towards others, but towards oneself - pity that the world is unfair.

fourth component(the fourth leg of the table) is Financial independence. Because, firstly, in the modern world, money is the most liquid commodity that allows you to satisfy the needs of everyone in what they do not have their own talents for. Secondly, financial independence is the opportunity to aim for something more.

So, the four legs of the conditional table - physical condition, relationships, self-realization, financial independence.

Does the table need a fifth leg? In my opinion, no.

What if one of the four legs breaks? The table will stand. The table can stand on two legs, but it will be very unstable! There are tables on one leg. And in life there are also cases when a person develops only in one or two directions. For example, a person spent most of his life building his own successful business. He realized his talents, gained financial independence, but did not build a family, no friends (relationships), his physical condition also leaves much to be desired. Or another example, a woman chose family relationships as the only direction of her own development. The only leg of the table developed and grew stronger, becoming the center and source of happiness. Years passed, the children grew up, the husband left ...

With all the variety of tables, the most stable are those that are held on four legs.

Why, with all the evidence of the values ​​described above, most people are dissatisfied with themselves and their own life results? There is a simple test. Those who are not too lazy to take paper and a pen or pencil to go through it will be able to draw very interesting conclusions for themselves.

1. Write in a column 4-5 of your values ​​(areas of life) that are most important to you. You can offer your own wording, for example, business, loved one, friends, family, money, etc./
2. Assign a place to each direction by importance for you in descending order.
3. Now honestly assign a place in descending order by time, which you spend on each of the directions.
4. Let's make the test harder! To do this, add one more line “Other” to the column of your priorities below.
5. And now distribute approximately how much of your time as a percentage you spend on each direction.

Values ​​(priorities) Time spent,%

___________________ ___________________
___________________ ___________________
___________________ ___________________
_____Other ______ ___________________

Try to be objective. If you wrote “Money” as one of your priorities, most likely you assume a rather large amount. At the same time, you earn several times less, and really do nothing to change the situation (you didn’t open your business in parallel, you don’t regularly send your resumes to those companies where you will be paid, the amount that you thought about in your priorities) . This means that you do not spend anything to achieve the result, you can put 0%. If your priorities are family, then think about how much time you devote to your soulmate, children, parents. This does not include the time when you are lying in front of the TV, spend on the Internet, even if at this moment your household is circling around you!

6. Take a look at what you got.

If the value for you and the time spent are different, you should not wait for the desired results.

I hope that the test helped you understand why expectations and reality do not match. If you saw promising areas for development, then it's time to build results and start acting!

I think, no matter what your own priorities are, they fit into the directions that are indicated above in this material (physical condition, relationships, self-realization, financial independence).

If you deliberately miss some direction from your own priorities, remember that tables are different, but a table with four legs is the most stable!

Sometimes it seems like the whole world is collapsing. Work and school assignments start piling up, household chores and responsibilities, obligations to friends and family - sometimes there are not enough hours in one day. By learning how to effectively prioritize, you will become a more productive worker, saving you time, energy and nerves. Learn to organize your tasks by categories and difficulty levels, and start practicing a professional approach to completing them. Skip to the first part for more information.

Steps

Part 1

Making a to-do list

Set a time frame for your list. Do you have a particularly busy week coming up? Crazy day? Perhaps the thought of what you need to do before the end of the year is crazy. Regardless of the nature of your commitments, pick a period of the priority list you hope to create and start managing those priorities and turning that stress into action.

• To short term goals often include items from different categories. Perhaps you have a few things to finish at work by the end of the day, as well as things to travel before heading home, and a lot of household chores when you finally get there. You could make a list of the culprits of stress, all the things that need to be done in the next few hours.
• Long term goals may include larger goals that need to be broken down into multiple steps and also need to be prioritized. You could put the goal of "getting into college" on your long-term to-do list, which would include various small things. This simple breakdown step will simplify and clarify the process.

1. Write down everything you need to do. Start breaking down the list and writing down exactly what you need to do in no particular order. Within deadlines that make you nervous, choose all the tasks—major or small—that need to be completed and list them. List projects that need to be completed, decisions that need to be made, and assignments that need to be travelled.

   Classify everything you need to do. It may be helpful to break things down into separate categories, that is, by creating different to-do lists for different areas of your life. Household chores may belong to one category and work projects to another. If you are actively involved in social activities, then there is probably a lot going on during the weekend that you should also prepare for and prioritize. Make a separate list for each category.

   Get the list in order. Identify the most important or urgent things on the list and rewrite the list with those things at the top. It's all up to you and the topics on your list, so you may decide that school activities take precedence over work projects, or vice versa.

   • Also, if everything is equally important and necessary, leave the list unordered and organize it alphabetically or randomly. As you actively tick off the list, all that matters is that you complete the items on the list.

2. Keep the list in a visible place. Keep your list somewhere visible, especially for long-term tasks, where you can use it as a reminder of what needs to be completed, actively checking or checking off items as you complete them.

   • If you've made a paper version of the list, hang it in a place you often look at, such as the refrigerator door, a bulletin board near your front door, or on your office wall.
   • Alternatively, you can keep the list open on your desktop while you're doing other things so they're fresh in your mind, and delete items when you're done.
   • Self-adhesive note paper is a great reminder around the house. If you stick one of these reminder papers on your TV screen, you will not forget to do an important task, instead of wasting time on less productive activities.

   Part 2

   Ordering your list items

   1. Sort the tasks in order of importance. What is the most important thing on your list? In general, you may decide that work/school tasks outweigh social and domestic tasks, although there may be some variation. You should eat and bathe, for example, although laundry can wait another day until you finish an important work project.

      • Define three different levels, they will be enough to classify different tasks and criteria from the list. High, medium and low task importance is the best and easiest way to start ranking the items on your list by importance. Be reasonable in your definition.

   2. Determine the urgency of each task. Consider upcoming deadlines and your ability to work within those deadlines. What needs to be done in the near future? What should be done by the end of the day? On what could you be able to buy a little more time?

      • It's important to consider the amount of time it will take you to complete each task, perhaps even assigning a set time to certain tasks. If you prioritize exercising every day but have a crazy amount of work to get done, set aside a 30-minute time frame for yourself and try to fit into it somehow.

   3. Classify each task according to the degree of difficulty. It may be important to have something delivered to the post office by the end of the day, but it's not a terribly difficult task. Classify all the items on your list by difficulty so you know how to rank them in relation to other tasks.

      • It will be effective to apply levels such as hard, moderate and easy for classification, rather than trying to rate them in comparison to each other. Don't worry about ordering them before assigning a difficulty level to each of the items, if that's helpful.

   4. Compare all the tasks and sort the list. At the top of the list, put the most important and urgent tasks that require the least effort in order to try to complete the maximum amount of work in the allotted time.

   Part 3

   Get started on the list

   Do one item at a time and see it through to the end. It's hard to move up the list by being selective and doing a little bit of everything. In a few hours, your list will look exactly like it does now: incomplete. Instead of doing a little bit, do one thing to the end, and then, after a short break, move on to the next one on the list. Don't start working on anything else on the list until you're done with the first most important things.

   Decide what to delegate to others and what will take its course. If the internet doesn't work at home, then it might be tempting to head to the library, start studying over wi-fi so that you can re-diagnose the problem, but not if you have to finish cooking dinner, check twenty papers before morning and do more fifty cases. Wouldn't it be better to contact the ISP instead?

   • It is acceptable to decide in favor of something that is not worth the time, or when the cost of delegating a task outweighs the time you spend on it. You could buy expensive new wire fencing, or scrape your own by scouring junkyards, carefully sorting through the scrap metal for hours in the hot sun, but if that adds up to just a few dollars in savings, it might be better to buy new wires.

   1. Alternate different tasks from the list. Separating the types of activities you do will help you keep things interesting and move faster through the items on your list. Alternate your homework to school list with your chores to get the most out of your work. Take small breaks between them and do different things. This will keep the enthusiasm and increase productivity.

      Start with the less attractive or most challenging tasks. Depending on your character, for your mood, it will be better if you first complete the work that you least desire to do. This may not necessarily be the most difficult or most important task, but for many people it will be effective to get rid of it in order to leave less unpleasant activities for later.

      • Your English essay may be more important than your math homework, but if you really hate math, get rid of it first so you can free up all the time you need and devote it exclusively to writing, giving it your full, unrestricted attention.

   2. Let the importance in some cases outweigh the actuality. You might be in a situation where you only have 10 minutes to drive across town to the library to pick up your ordered new Game of Thrones disc, making it the most important thing on the list, but that time could be better spent on performing a more important task, working on an essay in English. You will buy yourself more time if you wait until the next day to collect your DVD when you have more time to do so.

      As you complete tasks, cross them off the list. Congratulations! As you go down the list, take the joyous moment to cross out the item, delete it from the file, or aggressively cut out what is written on the paper with a rusty penknife and solemnly burn the pieces in the fire. Take a moment to reward yourself for every little achievement. You do it!

   What will you need

   • Pencil
   • Paper
   • Marker
   • Consider breaking a large task into several smaller ones. It’s not so scary to take on small things and it’s easier to complete.
   • Give yourself time to rest, relax and recuperate.
   • Be realistic about the volume completed over a given period of time.
   • Ask for help. Have family members or friends complete part of your list.
   • In the case of school assignments, at the top of the list should be those that will give you more points and that are due soon.
   • Leave time for the unexpected.
   • If two tasks have the same degree of importance or urgency, consider the one that requires less effort.
   • Half an hour to one hour will be enough to stay focused before needing a break.
   • Tasks requiring longer efforts may need special consideration to set aside a separate time for their completion.
   • Use a text editor or spreadsheet editor on your computer. Then you don't have to re-copy the list.
   • Help and teach this to others. If you finish things ahead of time, offer to help and teach your family and friends how to prioritize. Your parents may reward you with extra pocket money.
   • Skip or postpone things that are not so important and require a lot of effort.
   • You must master the time and plan ahead, as well as keep a positive attitude and not procrastinate.
   • Manage your time, plan ahead and don't procrastinate.
   • Remember the mantra "I can, I must and I will!" and don't complain about being busy.
   • Patience and hard work will certainly be rewarded.

The Pareto Principle states that a small proportion of causes, inputs, or efforts are responsible for a large proportion of results, outputs, or rewards earned. A small proportion of causes causes the lion's share of consequences. Pareto is unambiguous: the maximum of what you want will be the result of the minimum of what you do. Some things are more important than others, and by a lot. I want you to keep this principle in mind when compiling a to-do list - first identify the 20% of the most important thing, then select another 20% of them and continue in the same vein until you get the single, most important thing. You can start with a list of any length, but with the mindset that you must clear your way to the one most important thing.

Focus

It always takes some time to start a new task and return to what you were doing before you were interrupted, and it is not certain that you will be able to continue exactly where you got distracted. Studies show that about 28% of work time is wasted due to multitasking. Multitaskers are more stressed, make more mistakes, and lose the ability to correctly estimate the time needed to work on a task - they almost always feel that it will take more time than it really is. Every time we try to do two or more things at the same time, we simply divide our attention and reduce the demands on the results of each of the processes.

Form habits

Contrary to popular belief, success is not the result of a marathon of disciplined action. In fact, success is a sprint in which discipline is needed exactly until the moment a habit is formed. By forcing yourself, you accustom yourself to a certain course of action, and from some point it develops into a habit. Accept that it will take brutal discipline just to make a new kind of behavior habitual, and things will be much different. On average, it takes 66 days to form a habit. Build skills one by one. Success comes in sequence, not all at once. No one manages to acquire more than one strong habit in one period of time.

Ask yourself the big question

To rank tasks according to their importance, ask yourself the Focusing Question: “What is the one thing I can do that makes everything else easier or unnecessary?” This leads to specifics - you can choose only one option. The words "can do" contain a built-in command to do what is possible. People often replace this with “should” and “would like,” but all of these options are incorrect. What you can do is always more important than good intentions. The "so that as a result of this" part talks about the criteria that the answer must meet. It is a bridge between simply doing and doing purposefully. The last part of the phrase is the final test of the strength of the impact. The point is that when you do this one thing, everything else on the way to your goal will become achievable at the cost of less effort or even unnecessary.

Link today to the future

The more distant in time the future reward, the less motivation to receive it - this phenomenon is called "hyperbolic discounting". It serves as an explanation for the fact that most people prefer $100 right now to twice as much in the future. Their "current distortion" outweighs logic. There is a simple way of thinking that will overcome this.

What is one thing I can do to make everything else easier or unnecessary?

You have to imagine how one small thing gradually grows into a big one. It's a bit like a nesting doll: your main "right now" item is inside your main item for today, which sits inside your main item for this week, and so on. Train your mind to link goals in time. Connect your today to all your tomorrows. So you learn to think big, but purposefully.

Plan important

Successful people start by planning their free time from work. Why? They know they need it. Everything needs pauses to function properly, and you are no exception. Once you've planned your rest time, start allocating a temporary block for your main thing. If possible, it should be at the very beginning of the day. Leave yourself an hour to deal with urgent morning tasks, and then get on with the main thing. I recommend one four-hour time block per day. You can do more - go ahead. The next step in allocating time blocks is planning itself. This is the time when you reflect on where you are now and where you want to go. Set aside one hour each week to review your yearly and monthly goals. Ask yourself what needs to happen this month and this week to keep you within your yearly goals.

Protect your time

It is not difficult to allocate time - it is difficult to defend. The best way is to set these time blocks to be immovable. Therefore, if someone tries to keep you busy during this time, just apologize, say that you are already busy, and offer another option in return. If this is really something urgent, remember the rule of "lost - replaced" and immediately reschedule your time block. If you feel that at the moment of work, side thoughts pop up in your head, just write them down and continue doing what you were doing. Find a place to work away from the paths that distracters travel. Keep all the supplies, snacks, and drinks you might need handy, and don't leave your "bunker" for any reason other than going to the bathroom. Turn off your phone, close your email. Tell those who might be looking for you what you are doing and when you will be free.

Learn to refuse

To protect what you said “yes” to and stay productive, you should say “no” to everyone and everything that can undermine your efforts. No one knew how to say "no" better than Steve Jobs. Two years after his return to the company in 1997, the number of products in the Apple product line was reduced from 350 to 10. He explained this by saying: "Focusing means saying no." Every time you say “yes,” you pinch off a piece of the effectiveness of your efforts in all areas. So the more things you try to do, the less successful you are at each one. You can't please everyone, don't even try.

Hello my dear readers and guests of the blog! Life priorities are one of the most important components of human existence. They are all-encompassing values. They converge in many people, but are arranged in different ways. Therefore, one person can achieve a lot, while the other is marking time for a long time. This is because they have a different view of the world and accordingly their life priorities are distributed. It is very important to be able to recognize them and systematize them correctly in order to facilitate your existence and achieve.

The essence of the arrangement

As a rule, the main priorities in people's lives come down to a few things:

• a family;
• love;
• professional activity;
• maintaining health;
• studies;
• hobbies;
• self-respect;
• spiritual development;
• chat with friends.

All of these things are quite achievable. It is only important to find out in what sequence they need to be distributed and how much time to allocate to each. Usually people give preference to what is most important to them and what they cannot do without. For some, this is a craving for nature, for others - a love of art, for others - making money. Some put their family and children first.

However, priorities may change. Some come to the fore, others disappear altogether. It no longer depends on the desire of a person, but on the totality of opportunities for its implementation.

Sometimes aspirations lead to a goal and then the items on the list change. For example, a woman who is fully engaged in career advancement may completely forget about it in connection with the birth of a child or the illness of one of the family members.

Therefore, it is necessary to prioritize from the outset so that they succumb to outside influence as little as possible. The success or failure of many plans depends on them.

You need to clearly define your aspirations, arrange them in order of urgency or degree of need for implementation, and then begin to act in this direction.

Such a simple solution can help make human existence more meaningful, and successes numerous and reliable.

The Consequences of Misprioritization

If for a person in the first place is his family, friends or social good, there is nothing wrong or surprising in this. You just need to distribute your aspirations so that caring for your neighbor does not interfere with your own self-realization and professional activities.

Everything that makes a person happy should be at the very top of the list of life priorities. Under no circumstances should you refuse anything. You can simply distribute them in order to devote more time and effort to something, and less to something.

If a woman takes care of her children all day and deprives herself of the opportunity to watch the sunset or listen to her favorite music, then she may feel a sense of accomplishment, but she will not feel real joy. But she will accumulate a lot of irritation. Therefore, you need to clearly define not only what you need, but also what you want.

Some people have five or ten items on their list of priorities, while others include thirty on it. It is unlikely that they will be able to fulfill them all. This will cause impatience and nervousness. As a person begins to feel that a large number of things remain out of his reach, he will feel more like a failure.

Therefore, the list of priorities should be reviewed periodically, and the items themselves should be swapped or varied. Those that will always be in the first places should immediately begin to fulfill and devote maximum energy to them.

How to prioritize your life

Life forces us to do a lot without waiting for our desires to arise. Therefore, list items can change very dramatically and suddenly.

A person who considered getting a higher education his main aspiration, suddenly receives an offer of a highly paid job abroad. Then study becomes one of the items in the middle of the list, and a profitable position comes out on top.

As life returns to normal and professional responsibilities begin to become familiar and uncomplicated, higher education may once again become a priority. It will be even more important if obtaining a diploma becomes necessary for a promotion or increase in earnings.

If a person is lost, cannot decide what is important for him, refuses the necessary and rushes to the optional, he will bring misfortune to himself and others. Therefore, clarity in prioritization is needed. Too much depends on this in life and his loved ones.

For those who have not yet compiled such a list, it is advisable to start this. The criterion for arranging points in it should be to get a feeling of happiness. If something brings satisfaction, but does not bring joy, you can safely refuse it.

For example, quitting a job you love for a high-paying but unpleasant and alien profession should hardly top your list of priorities. The fulfillment of this desire will bring a lot of benefits, but will make a person unhappy, perhaps for life. Naturally, this does not mean living in poverty. Just one of the main items on the list should be an increase in earnings. Then he will feel successful and be proud of himself.

The need to follow life priorities

A scientific approach to the principle of arranging sequences in a list was proposed by the American scientist A. Maslow. He built a pyramid that includes the basic human needs, without which a full existence is impossible. If at least one of them remains unsatisfied, then people will feel trapped.

Life values ​​are arranged as follows.

1. Physiology (food, thirst quenching, heating, procreation instinct);
2. No life threatening.
3. Love.
4. Respect for those around you.
5. Education and creativity.
6. Striving for beauty.
7. Self-realization.

This prioritization makes it possible to build a balanced life. However, even a scientifically proven ranking allows for changes or shifts in positions. If a person is full and safe, he may think about finding love. If he is in a strong marriage and is quite successful, then the respect of others comes to his forefront. Those who are unemployed or completely deprived of a roof over their heads are not up to aesthetic preferences - they are fighting for survival.

Each inner world is individual. Every person has his own set of life values, main priorities and principles. But they may well go against each other, preventing him from fulfilling his plan.

For example, a rich man who loves a poor woman is sometimes unable to step over prejudices or his own greed. Therefore, the need for a reciprocal feeling becomes a victim of more pressing priorities, which consist in increasing one's wealth. In addition, it is important that an equally successful partner is next to him. Such a man is able to make himself unhappy, the lady he fell in love with and his wife, whom he married for the sake of maintaining status.

However, if he followed the dictates of his heart and committed himself to a poor woman, he would become unhappy due to the lowering of his position in society and fears that he was loved only for profit.

Therefore, a clear understanding of oneself, one's true life values ​​and the ability to refuse what is not really necessary and necessary is the key to a full and happy life.

Making your own priorities

It is necessary to take paper and write a complete list of what is really required, without which existence is impossible. It can be a list of your desires, long-term plans or individual values. Someone will put in it the upbringing of children in the first place, someone - care for elderly parents, and someone - career advancement. All other items will become secondary, and something may have to be abandoned, completely or temporarily.

The list might look like this:

1. Job.
2. Health.
3. Family care.
4. Love.
5. Nature.
6. Music.
7. Sports.

It is clear that it includes, albeit simple, but very capacious points. At the same time, he takes into account the occurrence of possible difficulties. Priorities are arranged so that they can be shifted, but are not excluded from the list. In order to fully take care of your loved ones, you need funds, so work comes to the fore. But, in case someone gets sick, then it can be temporarily rearranged to second place. We will have to reduce professional duties to the extent possible, giving the freed time and energy to caring for relatives until they are fully recovered. Then the points can again take their places.

If a person is sick, it is clear that work ceases to be his main priority. Now all his aspirations are aimed at curing, otherwise he will not be able to fully fulfill his duties and may lose his job and earnings. As you recover, the list items also change places.

Therefore, if it is compiled correctly, then the graphs can be shifted, but they will not disappear. Moreover, there will be few of them in it and they are all subject to human control.

It is worse if he goes with the flow or desires get confused and crawl on top of each other. A woman who cares about her children and demands high school performance from them, while putting career aspirations in the first place. As a result, at work she worries about the child all the time, and at home she does not have time to pay enough attention to school success.

A sick person or even a disabled person is so passionate about sports, especially extreme ones, that he is not able to refuse it. As a result, his priorities are not health care, but mountain climbing or winter swimming. In the end, he brings himself to a serious condition or even to death.

A man who loves his children more than anything in the world has fallen in love with another woman and is preparing to start a new family with her.

In the end, it all comes down to the fact that he constantly reproaches her for making him unhappy, suffers himself at the thought of separation from the kids and questions all their love. At the same time, he also torments his spouse with his indecision, never making a final decision on the preservation or dissolution of the marriage.

Therefore, once again it is very important to emphasize. In the first place in the priorities should go not desirable, but necessary. Then you don’t have to fight with yourself, endlessly adjust your plans and bring grief to other people.

That's all for today, now you know how to prioritize your life. If the article has become useful and interesting for you, share it with your friends. See you soon!