Openness is one of the most attractive features of the human character. Closed, secretive people cause alertness, it is difficult to contact them. But isolation often burdens the loner himself, and he tries to understand how to become an open person, how to communicate freely and easily in any company. It is worth first understanding what openness is.

What is openness

Openness in psychology is understood as spiritual generosity, the ability to share one's thoughts and feelings with others, the ability to accept any person in one's circle of communication. However, these attractive qualities are only the tip of the iceberg. And if you want to understand how to become a more open person, then you need to understand the deep psychological characteristics of these people. Here are the most important ones.

By knowing how to become an open person, you will be able to enjoy life more.

• Extraversion is a person's orientation towards the world, acceptance of the world, and not just sociability, but sincere pleasure from contacts with others.
• High emotional tone and optimism. Positive emotions experienced by extroverts not only attract people to them, but also infect them with energy and good mood.
• Self-confidence. This quality allows a person not to be afraid to freely express his opinion, share thoughts and feelings.
• Sociability. Communication is the native element for an open personality. Such a person is fluent in basic communication tools, their choice occurs almost on an intuitive level. These people are called the soul of the company, they are charming and at the same time convincing, they are able not only to entertain, but also to captivate with their ideas.
• Sincerity. Often this concept is equated with honesty, but it is deeper and is closely related to positive emotions. The word "sincerity" comes from "spark" - it is a bright fire burning in the soul and reflected in the eyes. He attracts an open person, makes him believe.

Most of these qualities are based on individual psychological characteristics. There are people who were already born with the makings of an open personality. But is it possible to develop these qualities? Can a closed person, squeezed in the grip of conventions and his own complexes, change? Yes maybe. But for this, he must want to change and make efforts for this.

The main difficulty is not even the need to change yourself. The fact is that "openness", "sociability" - these are the qualities that other people see in us. And it is very difficult to change the already established opinion of others, their stereotype of perception. But if you decide to create a new image for yourself, then do not back down and follow the advice of psychologists.

How to become an open and sociable person? We need to communicate as much as possible.

• Learn to treat criticism in your address calmly and with humor, laugh at yourself without waiting for others to do it. In any community there are envious people and ill-wishers, the most effective weapon against them is a sincere smile.
• To become an open and sociable person, you need to communicate. Expand your circle of contacts. But not in social networks, where the formation of the image is just a game, but in reality.
• Show interest in others and do it actively, but unobtrusively. Try to listen carefully, show interest, do not shy away from the opportunity to help, support. Train yourself to be useful to people, not for some benefit, but just like that.
• Learn to talk about yourself. In a conversation, remember an interesting case, a story, an example from your life, share your successes, complain about oversights. Just don't complain - people often don't like to hear about other people's problems.
• Try to use the maximum number of means of communication: facial expressions, especially a smile, gestures, intonation, speech means.

Openness is a great quality, but it is appropriate only in combination with positive emotions and optimism. It should be remembered that open demonstration of your anger, irritability, complaints about problems and failures are unlikely to attract people to you.

Often in the company you can meet a pretty girl who sits aside and is silent. At first glance, such persons seem arrogant, but in reality the situation is different. Beautiful ladies, endowed with natural charm, cannot keep up the conversation. This situation arises for many reasons: some are afraid of communication, others do not know where to start a conversation. To become the soul of the company, you need to work on your own communication skills, improving them daily.

Step #1. Don't analyze your own words

When a person feels awkward communicating with other people, he subconsciously tries to analyze his own communication. From here begins a full-scale selection of the “correct” words, isolation and awkwardness develop.

No need to think ahead of dialogues that have not yet taken place, act according to the situation and at the same time watch the language. If you neglect this advice, you will not be able to experience the true pleasure of communicating in a company.

In cases where you are in an unfamiliar company, do not swear, do not make sharp remarks and jokes. In the rest of the plan, there are no restrictions, you do not need to make sentences in your head according to the rules of the Russian language.

If you suddenly disgrace yourself, know how to laugh at yourself. Try to find a way out of the situation by staying positive, don't close in. Learn to joke, thereby encouraging people to smile. Later you will notice that opponents experience the joy of communicating with you, this will contribute to emancipation.

Step #2. Be realistic about criticism

Criticizing one's own "I" is the right thing to do, but the procedure must be carried out with a cold mind. If you reproach yourself for any reason, stop.

It is not uncommon for a person, being alone with his thoughts, to engage in self-flagellation. He replays awkward interpersonal moments over and over in his head. Such a move only aggravates the situation, forcing him to become withdrawn and gloomy.

To become a cheerful and sociable person, you need to treat everything with humor. Know how to listen and hear what you are told. It is not necessary to follow the pointer, it is enough to give the impression that the opponent was understood.

Step #3. Highlight positive traits

When a person is closed, he does not notice his own pluses, seeing minuses in everything. If you are one of these characters, it's time to correct the situation.

Take a notebook or landscape sheet, write down your positive qualities, achievements, victories. At the same time, important attention must be paid to material well-being, intellectual and physical abilities, and the emotional component (personal character traits). The next time you decide to think negatively, read the above and smile. You are a person with your pluses and minuses.

Start working with your mind. Drive into your head the idea that you are a cheerful and sociable person. Do not use words such as “nerd”, “spleen”, “anti-social”, “boring”, “unsociable”, etc. in relation to yourself. Once you believe that you are able to carry on a conversation and be the life of the company, this will certainly happen. Everything that happens is in the head.

It is also important to subconsciously agree with yourself that you love people. Such a move will contribute to the disclosure of you as a person, pushing you to interesting acquaintances. Of course, there are a lot of hypocritical, evil and greedy people, but you should not send everyone under the same brush. Learn to distinguish such characters from those who are really worthy of your attention.

Step number 4. Don't overestimate your importance

A very interesting discovery was made by psychologists. They proved that humble individuals, who are usually overlooked in the company, tend to think that they are significant. Such people sincerely believe that they are being watched by other participants in the conversation and secretly criticized. However, such misconceptions are extremely erroneous.

This paradox makes a person feel uncomfortable being in a big company. Hence there is a reluctance to communicate and a fear of contact in general.

Such an outcome of events does not mean at all that your presence is indifferent to the interlocutors, no. They are too busy to constantly pay attention or engage in unnecessary criticism in their head.

People are so passionate about their own "I" that they simply do not notice the likely shame or misplacement of words. For this reason, you do not need to withdraw into yourself, stop paying attention to others. Even if your oversight (which has not yet happened) is noticed, it will be forgotten after 5-10 minutes.

Step number 5. Become an active conversationalist

To become a sociable person, you need to learn to listen to the interlocutor and actively maintain a dialogue. In the process of communication, pay attention to the behavior of the opponent, remember what he says. Ask relevant questions, don't look away, make eye contact. Nod in every possible way, make it clear that you care about his story.

Learn to respect the person standing in front of you and telling you something that he thinks is interesting. Do not check your phone every 5 minutes, do not sit on VKontakte, do not look around. Such behavior is considered rude, it will show the opponent that you are not interested in his company.

Maintain a positive wave, do not complain about life, do not talk about meager financial well-being. On the contrary, make it clear that no difficulty will lead you astray. When your opponent asks you to tell "something about yourself", focus on the fun moments. If the interlocutor wants to get advice, try to choose the words as sincerely as possible and solve the problem.

Step number 6. Practice Communication

Like any other business, the ability to be a cheerful and sociable person appears with experience. You can’t immediately be born as the soul of the company, people come to this with age, the basics are laid in childhood. Get ready for the fact that from now on you will have to get out of your comfort zone and train hard.

At every opportunity, do not miss the opportunity to exchange a couple of phrases with colleagues, households, friends. Do not divide life into "training" and "everyday", combine one with the other.

Don't be afraid to talk to the salesperson about the weather or the bus driver about traffic conditions. Ask the neighbor grandmothers how their health is or discuss the yard cat. You must be involved in all spheres of life, behave at ease.

Don't turn down an invitation from your friends to attend a big weekend party, go bowling or hang out in the park. Become the initiator of parties, gather everyone together, go to have fun and chat. Interesting events that have happened with the company will set the stage for a new topic to be discussed.

Step number 7. Pay attention to gestures

Sign language is considered to be an important aspect of proper communication. In the course of a conversation, a person throws up his hands, rubs his eyebrow, straightens his hair or looks away, all this must be taken into account. The specific position of the opponent's body characterizes his location.

If you want to engage in dialogue, you do not need to stand in the corner of the room or sit modestly on the couch with your arms crossed over your chest. This sign symbolizes closeness, unwillingness to communicate. Also, do not constantly peck your nose at the phone, showing disinterest. Live in the real, not the virtual world.

Smile more often, make eye contact, don't touch your clothes. Show yourself open and ready for interesting conversations. Don't wait to be called to the company, come by yourself. Show people that you have an interest in communicating with them, become an initiator.

Step number 8. Make new acquaintances

Many people for some reason are afraid of new acquaintances, and this is not surprising. For a person who is not accustomed to constant communication, this state of affairs is a real stress. However, to become cheerful and sociable, you need to work on yourself constantly.

When you only keep in touch with good friends, you automatically fall into a comfort zone. There is no need to talk on general topics here, the dialogues become more personal and open. In the case of unfamiliar people, there is a need for constant adaptation, which is considered an indisputable plus.

Look for any ways to make new acquaintances. Travel, socialize, attend big parties. Do not refuse friends when they once again invite you to meet interesting people. The main thing is to be yourself in any situation, do not try to please everyone. Stand up for an opinion, but don't argue too violently. Learn to say “No!” when the situation calls for it.

It is easy to become a sociable and cheerful person if certain psychological aspects are observed. Do not try to analyze your own words and actions, learn to accept objective criticism, do not be led by emotions. Pay attention to positive features, regularly improve in conversations with opponents. Look for ways to make new acquaintances, become an active interlocutor.

Video: how to become sociable

Sometimes it seems that someone is just a very sociable person from birth, but in fact it is possible to independently become a person with developed social skills, if necessary. In this article, you will learn how to be sociable and interesting.

Part one: overcoming the complexes we have

• Make a list that will describe all your positive aspects. Consider both your internal qualities and external data. You can view this list every day. Hang it, for example, on your refrigerator.
• Not worth it talk about yourself as a person whory tries to avoid communication with people, as he is not sure of himself. So you internally set yourself up for negativity in advance. This does not help solve the problem, but, on the contrary, only worsens it. If you really would like to actually communicate more with different people, then it is worth believing in the possibility of this.
• We all know that people are both good and bad. You should not see everyone in advance as bad. This, in turn, will prevent you from making contact with those who are not really one. Take this moment into account and consider it.

Part Two: How to improve the social side of your life

1. Exercise regularly. Try to make the social aspect of your life as ordinary as possible for you. It is worth trying to communicate with other people as often as possible. Communication― this is, in theory, the same skill or in other words― skill to be developed. To do this, do not avoid conversations. This can be done if the interlocutor or the very topic of the conversation is something unacceptable for you. Try to invite people together to visit some interesting events that might interest them as often as possible. Also, do not refuse if you are invited somewhere. It is in such cases that you can practice communicating with other people. If, for example, you refuse, then in this case your friends or those who know may think that it is unpleasant for you to see them. In the future, they may simply stop inviting you somewhere. Take note of the moment and take it into account. Otherwise, you will have less and less chance to carry on conversations.
   
2. Try to be a positive person. There are so many injustices and bad things in the world. Therefore, many people simply avoid those people who themselves are a source of negativity. This is quite natural. Therefore, try to talk about sad things as little as possible, and instead at least try to set yourself up in a positive way. If it is positive that comes from you, then there is a great chance that people will be interested in finding out what kind of person you really are.
   
3. Be directly involved in the communication process. When talking with someone, try to set yourself up in advance for the positive and do not think about the bad. Listen to what the interlocutor says to you so that you can keep up the conversation. Don't get distracted by your smartphone. It is better to turn it off in advance or switch it to silent mode. Show that for you at the moment of communication the person is interesting.
   
4. Pay attention to body language. In fact, such a body language can also say a lot about this or that person. For example, if a person looks openly and directly into your eyes, then most likely he is in the mood for a conversation. You don’t need to cross your arms or legs when talking, spend every minute checking the news on a social network using your phone, and so on.
   
5. Become the initiator of communication with other people. You should not wait for the first step from certain people, because you can do it yourself. Show that you would not mind continuing your communication with this or that person. Invite him yourself to some event that will be interesting to both you and your interlocutor. Do not forget about your friends and relatives who are currently in other cities. You can, for example, just go and call them to ask how they are doing.
   
6. Try to start meeting new people yourself. In order to expand your circle of friends, you need not be afraid of meeting new people for you. For this, do not refuse to visit some entertainment establishments or attend events. This is where you have the most opportunities to meet someone new. Of course, you need to exercise some caution when meeting people you do not know. Don't forget about your safety too. It is better to meet people in interest clubs and so on. You never know who this or that new person may be for you.
   

Tips on how to become a sociable and interesting person:

• Being a sociable person does not mean that you have to have friendly relations with absolutely all people. It would be very strange and even impossible. Instead, it is better to have some kind of small circle of friends or acquaintances close to you, this is the most beneficial.
• Smile as often as possible. Earlier in this article, we talked about the value of being a positive person, as it attracts people to you. So, it’s worth starting with the simplest, which is available to absolutely everyone,― with smiles. Do not underestimate this tool, because in reality it can help you win people over in the first place.
• In any case, first of all, you need to be yourself. No need to play someone's role and try to please everyone in this way. Nobody likes it.
• If you feel that you lack communication, then join some kind of interest club, where it will be inevitable.

Now you know how to become a more sociable person.

Everyone has experienced communication difficulties. Every day we communicate with dozens of people. Each of them has their own interests, opinions and habits that differ from yours. When communicating, you have to adapt to the characteristics and character of the interlocutor. Indeed, it is difficult to find a common language with everyone, some are even difficult to understand. And it is absolutely impossible to find a common language with strangers always. So, if you are experiencing this kind of difficulty, do not despair. This is a fairly common problem and there are simple ways to solve it.

Why do we need communication?

Becoming more confident and sociable is an important task. As a result of careful psychological research, it was found that mental and physical health depends on communication. Talking to an interesting person is uplifting. And those who feel like part of a team are happier, get sick less often, and are less prone to stress.

People whose social circle is limited to family and a few colleagues often feel lethargic and apathetic. It is difficult for them to succeed in any kind of activity, they are less likely to decide on cardinal changes. Women who refuse to work and communicate after the birth of a child, which is why they feel irritability and dissatisfaction. The same goes for people who have lost their jobs. The restriction of social contacts also affects the appearance.

Watching successful people, you can see how easily they make friends and keep up the conversation. For them, the opinion of others is important, it is important to be an interesting conversationalist. To become a more sociable person means to develop in other areas.

When difficulties arise and how to overcome them

Difficulties in communication can be intermittent or permanent. In the first case, we are talking about difficult, unpleasant conversations, attempts to join a new team, etc. In the second case, we can talk about excessive isolation or lack of communication skills. It is easier to deal with occasional difficulties. Sometimes it’s enough just to tune in yourself or give the interlocutor time for the same.

To overcome permanent communication difficulties, you will have to make an effort. To become a more sociable person, you need to observe yourself for some time and remember the reaction of others.

Remember, becoming more sociable is not just a desire, but a vital necessity. Only having the opportunity to fully communicate, you can succeed and learn to enjoy life. Therefore, do not delay, start following the tips given in the article immediately!

Often attractive and endowed with natural charm, girls undeservedly remain forgotten in cheerful companies, sitting on the sidelines or in the shadow of more provocative girlfriends. They are modestly silent when they are asked questions, and are not able to tell a single funny story. " How to become a sociable person? How to stop being closed and become the soul of any company?”- girls often turn to us who have difficulty communicating, not only with strangers, but even with those they know well.

Let's say right away: it's not so easy, but nothing is impossible for a person with intellect! Having set ourselves the task of increasing communication skills, that is, the ability to communicate with other people and quickly find a common language with them, it is quite possible to achieve a real result, you just need to want to!

How to become sociable if you are afraid of people?

Some prefer, surrounded by the closest people, to sit inside their “mink” and not even try to stick their nose out. “Why do I need this?” they ask. For these people, the problem of sociability is not worth it, they simply do not need it.

For everyone else, the presence of friends, acquaintances, work colleagues is simply vital, and not just a presence, but daily communication, exchange of information, life experience. Man is a creature that lives and interacts with others like himself, such is life.

One girl said: “I am afraid of people! In a store it is very difficult for me to even ask the price of a product, in a university auditorium I can’t even utter a word in front of my classmates under a lot of looks, and even to be the first to speak with a stranger, there can be no question!

When I began to find out the reason for such “human fear”, I found out that in the elementary grades at the children's matinee, she forgot her rhyme, stumbled and was ridiculed, not only by the kids from her group, but also by their parents. It was this episode that became the “anchor” that for a long time crossed out for the girl the opportunity to feel free among other people, constantly dragging her into the past. Gradually, we were able to rid her of her previous fears and fears of becoming funny, so everything is solved!

If so far you cannot independently determine what is the reason for your indecision in communication, you should definitely contact a professional psychologist. Believe me, often a few sessions are enough to completely change a person's life.

Why develop communication skills and become sociable?

Unfortunately, some individuals tend to go astray when they say, "I can live without associating with someone else!"

• If you work, your career is unthinkable without constantly being in contact with partners, colleagues, clients and many other people. The ability to most accurately formulate the right thoughts, to express them without fear, to find the required words in situations that require an unforeseen or unusual solution is an indispensable condition for success in moving up the ladder of your career.
• Winning the respect of the people around you in various situations is impossible without the fact that you have to defend your views and your point of view from time to time. For example, in conflict or contentious situations, one cannot do without expressing one's views and arguments, because this is how one can avoid both quarrels and conflicts. To be able to put your arguments in the right words, to prove your case without affecting the interests of other people is very important in our troubled life.
• To be attractive to the opposite sex, to be an interesting conversationalist for men - this is another reason why many girls strive to increase their level of sociability. And this is right, because in communication you can get to know a person better, his personality traits and understand, finally, whether this is your soul mate or just a fellow traveler!

It happens that a person is already born with a talent for communication, as a child he easily and willingly comes into contact with peers and even adults. But many learn this art all their lives. I hope that with our help you will succeed!

And lastly, remember that sociability can only be sincere and honest, if a person is hypocritical, likes to lie and strives to be in the center of attention by any means, believe me, hardly anyone will want to meet with such an interlocutor again. Be open, honest, remember that no two people are the same, everyone has their own “minuses” and their “pluses”. Learn to be patient with the shortcomings of other people, and then they will notice your virtues more often. Good luck!