Many people sometimes feel that they are too shy. Of course, this cannot but interfere: shyness prevents promotion at work, does not allow you to freely meet and communicate with people, makes you refuse to participate in interesting events ... The list of “side effects” of shyness is endless. In order to determine the degree of your shyness, you can use a specially designed shyness test.

What is shyness?

Shyness characterizes a condition that makes you literally feel uncomfortable in the company of other people. This feature is very characteristic of introverts and, one might say, determines their psychological make-up. It is difficult for a shy person to start a conversation, he often cannot find the right words. We can say that shyness is a feeling of constant monitoring of one’s own behavior: it seems that a severe punishment is due for every wrong action, so you can’t make a mistake in any case. As a result, a shy person falls into a kind of stupor, being in a large company.

Is it good or bad? We can say that shyness is inherent in every person to one degree or another: sometimes anyone can get confused. But some people feel constrained, speaking in front of huge audiences, in other situations feeling quite comfortable, while others find it difficult to even ask a forgetful seller for change. Simple shyness test will help determine the degree of modesty.

Stanford Shyness Test

The most popular and widely used shyness test is the Stanford shyness test. The test is quite effective: more than five thousand people around the world took it at the development stage, and its results with a high degree of reliability allow determining how shy a person is.

The test contains a series of questions, answering which the subject assesses the degree of his own shyness. As a result, he will receive data on how much it interferes in life. Pass the shyness test certainly worth it to all those who are tormented by their own timidity. This will help identify issues that need to be worked on. You can take the test as often as necessary to evaluate the result of developing self-confidence.

A small test to determine the level of shyness

There is also an express method for determining shyness. It can be completed much faster than Stanford shyness test: just read a few statements and evaluate how they characterize your behavior.

1. I dislike the company of strangers.
2. I feel uncomfortable with most people.
3. I feel helpless when surrounded by strangers.
4. I don’t like holidays and corporate parties, because I can’t relax and feel constant tension while attending them.
5. During a conversation, I am always afraid that I will say some stupid thing and cause disapproval.
6. I feel very strong tension when I have a conversation with a famous or authoritative person.
7. It is difficult for me to communicate with people of the opposite sex, even if they are part of my company.
8. I try to make as little eye contact as possible.
9. I do my best to avoid conflict situations.
10. I often replay recent conversations and arguments in my head, thinking of what to say.

If you agree with six or more of the following, then your level of shyness is pretty high. It is considered normal to agree with two of the ten points listed above.

P.S. In order to take concrete practical steps, I recommend paying attention to the course on . In which in 5 weeks you will bring your state to openness, greater confidence, and among people you will feel comfortable and easy. And even, you will start to enjoy communication.
The course is based on thousands of hours of my practice of working with clients, and is based on real human mental processes. I highly recommend making time for this course!

Do you want to get rid of isolation as quickly as possible?
Waiting for (we work until we win)!
Oleg.

Every person should be a little shy. A normal level of shyness makes a person more acceptable in communication, gives him a charm that "people without complexes" do not have. But just how, I wonder, are you shy?

Answer the questions "yes" or "no".

1. If my outfit at a party is strikingly different from the clothes of the rest, I will feel embarrassed.

2. It will be unpleasant for me if someone wants to read my diary or personal correspondence.

3. It is difficult for me to decide to invite someone to dinner, as I am afraid of being rejected.

4. If I am invited to take part in an unfamiliar game, I will most likely refuse.

5. Being late for the meeting, I will not dare to enter the room, because the eyes of all those present will turn on me.

6. Speaking to the audience, I will not be able to take my eyes off the pre-prepared text, even if I am perfectly familiar with the topic of the report.

7. In the gym or at dances, I usually stand modestly against the wall, embarrassed by my own slowness.

8. I avoid telling jokes or funny stories. When I notice that I am being listened to attentively, I usually get embarrassed and lose the thread of the story.

9. When I am angry with someone, I always let him know.

10. It gives me pleasure to appear in public places in new fashionable clothes.

11. I take part in competitions with displeasure, regardless of my level of training.

12. If after the lecture something is still unclear, I will ask the teacher to explain again.

13. On the beach or in the pool, I do not hesitate to put on a bathing suit.

14. When in a dance class or in a sports club, the coach chooses a partner to demonstrate the exercise, I always hope that he will pay attention to me.

15. I enjoy listening to others' feedback on my work.

16. Having become the object of a joke, I will always laugh with everyone and will not be offended at all.

Count the number of positive answers from block A and negative answers from block B. Add up the numbers - this is an indicator of the level of your shyness.

From 14 to 16. You are terribly shy. You pay too much attention to what others think about your appearance, figure, intelligence, or ability to connect with people. It's time to become more independent and learn to defend your own opinion!

From 10 to 13. The opinion of others is important to you, and sometimes this dependence can cause trouble. You should learn to feel more relaxed, and then you will get rid of the fear of not being recognized by society.

7 to 9. Shyness is one of your character traits, but you are successfully fighting it. Go through the list of questions to determine your most vulnerable spot: intelligence (yes on 2 and 6; no on 12 and 15); appearance (yes on 1 and 5; no on 10 and 13), social status (“yes” on 3 and 8; “no” on 9 and 16) or athletic form (“yes” on 4 and 7; “no” on 11 and 14).

3 to 6. B life you go your own way, while taking into account the opinions of others. Optimal balance!

0 to 2. The opinion of others about your person is of absolutely no interest to you. You sail your own course, but in relation to others you are too cold and indifferent. A little attention to people will make your life easier and more interesting.

Present Simple (Indefinite) - present simple (indefinite) tense. Education and use

The present simple is one of the most common tenses in English and denotes an action that happens regularly, constantly, as can be seen in the following example:

The example below describes an action that Jane performs regularly (for example, from Monday to Friday). However, this does not mean at all that Jane is doing the same action right now: perhaps now she has a day off, and she is resting or doing something unrelated to her profession.

Formation of the affirmative form Present Simple

The affirmative (Affirmative), that is, the non-interrogative and non-negative not form of the verb is formed by using the original form of the verb without the to particle in the sentence, for example:
However, if the subject in the sentence is expressed in the form 3rd person singular(to which the pronouns correspond he - he, she - she, it - it), then the verb gets the ending -(e)s:

to travel	He usually travel s two times a year.	He usually goes on a trip twice a year.
to earn	tom earn s a lot of money.	Tom earns a lot of money.
to smoke	Jim smoke s 10 cigarettes a day.	Jim smokes 10 cigarettes a day.

Features of the formation of the 3rd person singular form of some verbs

1. If the verb ends in -s, -z, -sh, -ch, -x or -o, then the ending is added when forming this form -es:

to pass	passes	Jim always passes the ball to me.	Jim always passes the ball to me.
to buzz	buzzes	This bee buzzes very loudly.	This bee buzzes very loudly.
to wash	washes	Mary washes the dishes in a restaurant.	Mary is washing dishes in a restaurant.
to teach	teaches	Tom teaches history at school.	Tom teaches history at the school.
to fix	fixes	Alex fixes cars at Phil's Garage.	Alex repairs cars at Phil's Garage.
to go	goes	Jessica goes to a disco every Saturday.	Jessica goes to the disco every Saturday.

It is worth noting that the letter -e- in the ending in this case it reads like [I] (except for verbs in -O), while adding -s to a verb with "mute" (unreadable) -e at the end, -e remains unpronounceable. Compare:

To watch - watches
to make-makes

1. If the verb ends in - at, then you should pay attention to which letter is before- at: vowel means that - at is preserved when adding an ending, a consonant means - at will turn into -ie:

to pl a y	pla y s	Ann often plays with her little nephew.	Ann often plays with her little nephew.
to stu d y	stud ie s	John studies medicine at university.	John studies medicine at the university.

Formation of the negative form in Present Simple

If you want to use a verb with a particle not, that is, to make a negative sentence, you will need an auxiliary verb do for most cases and its form does for the 3rd person singular. A particle is added directly to the auxiliary verb not, which in practice often gives the following abbreviations:

do not = don't
does not = doesn't

An auxiliary verb in one of the above negative forms is placed immediately before the semantic verb, which must be in its original form, that is, the ending -(e)s in the 3rd person singular is not added. This is because the end -(e)s in this case is already present in the auxiliary verb in the form do es n't. For example:

We don't like coffee.	We don't like coffee.
He don't play basketball at school.	He doesn't play basketball at school.
Theydon't have breakfast in the morning.	They don't have breakfast in the morning.
Sarah don't walk her dog in the afternoon.	Sarah doesn't walk her dog in the afternoon.

Formation of interrogative forms in Present Simple

The form on which the compilation of any type of question is based (and there are 5 in total) is the form general question, that is, a question that requires a “Yes” or “No” answer. It is formed by putting the same auxiliary verb in the first place in the sentence Do or its forms Does for the 3rd person singular, followed by the subject and the semantic verb in the original form, respectively:

Do/Does + S + V 1 …?
Where S- subject, and V 1- semantic verb in its original form.
The answer to such questions is often the words Yes / Yes and No / No. However, answering with only one of these words will not be sufficient in English. Traditionally, a short answer to a general question is built according to the following schemes:

A) for an affirmative answer: Yes, SP + do/does., Where SP- subject in the form of a personal pronoun, for example:

- Do you travel a lot? - Yes, I do.	- Do you travel a lot? - Yes.
- Does Mary work in a hotel? - Yes, she does.	- Mary works in a hotel? - Yes.

b) for a negative answer: No, SP + don't/doesn't., For example:
Special question or a question with a question word asks for specific information and is built according to the scheme:

Wh + do/does + S + V 1 …?

Where wh- question word, S- subject, and V 1- semantic verb in its original form, for example:

However, it should be noted that this scheme is not suitable for questions that begin with the word Who in the sense of "Who?" and (less often) What in the sense of "What?" (in the nominative case), since such questions do not belong to the special group. This questions to the subject that require education according to the following scheme:

Who/What + V(e)s …?

The verb in such questions most often takes the form of the 3rd person singular ( V(e)s), For example:

Alternative question, involving a choice of two or more objects or actions, is constructed exactly by analogy with a general question, but requires the presence of a union in the sentence or/or, For example:

Separated question, or the so-called "tag question", is a small addition to an affirmative or negative sentence and questions what is said in it. Such a question is always translated into Russian in the same way - “isn't it? / isn’t it?”, but it is formed differently depending on the structure of the original sentence, for example:

The dividing question is built according to the following schemes:

A) for an affirmative base sentence: don't/doesn't +SP?

B) for a negative base sentence: do/does +SP?

The above rules for the formation of affirmative (Affirmative), interrogative (Interrogative) and negative (Negative) forms allow you to understand how the Present Simple is formed, and you can easily remember them from the following table (using the example of the verb go):

Affirmative	Negative	Interrogative
I go	I don't go	Do I go?
You go	You don't go	Do you go?
He goes	He doesn't go	Does he go?
She goes	She doesn't go	Does she go?
It goes	It doesn't go	Does it go?
We go	We don't go	Do we go?
You go	You don't go	Do you go?
They go	They don't go	Do they go?

Table of formation of affirmative, negative and interrogative sentences in Present Simple Tense

Special cases of the formation of forms Present Simple

Separate verbs, among which, mainly auxiliary and modal, form the corresponding forms of the present simple tense not according to the above rules:

1. Verb tobe-"be» has the following forms: I am, he/she/it is, you/we/they are. Interrogative and negative forms are formed without the auxiliary verb do/does.
2. Verb to have - "to have" in the 3rd person singular. numbers are in the form has.
3. Verb can - "to be able, to be able" in all faces has the same shape can. The negation looks like can't/cannot, and the question is built without do/does.
4. Verb must - "to be due" also has the same shape in all faces - must. Negation has the form mustn't, and the question is formed without the participation of do/does.

Areas of use Present Simple

an action that happens regularly	I usually get up at 7 o'clock.	I usually get up at 7 o'clock.
an ongoing action	We live in a small village near Dublin.	We live in a small village near Dublin.
well-known facts	Water freezes at 0ºC.	Water freezes at 0ºC.
actions that will take place in the future according to a plan or schedule	Our train arrives at 8:30 p.m.	Our train will arrive at 8:30 pm.
a sequence of actions that acts as a kind of forward planning	I graduate from the university, take a year off, travel a lot, find an interesting job and only then think of getting married.	I graduate from university, take a year off, travel a lot, find an interesting job, and only then think about marriage.
actions that happened in the past, in headings for the emotional "approach" of the event	Terrorists organize riots in Paris.	Terrorists organized riots in Paris.

Thus, the present simple tense is widely used in speech and is one of the basic elements on which the subsequent study of the English language is built.

Prevent people from developing their communication skills. Constant awkwardness and stiffness in the presence of strangers causes serious anxiety and problems for shy people. A shy person would rather avoid socializing than spend time in noisy company.

The reason for shyness is considered to be the fear of receiving a negative assessment of one's behavior and one's actions from other people. A person can generally begin to avoid, just so as not to get condemned by acquaintances of his behavior, which affects the person’s ability to realize the inherent potential and talents. Gradually, a person ceases to feel in demand in the labor market, ceases to develop and improve his own qualifications, gradually degrading.

A shy person tries to distance himself from communication with a large circle of people, limiting himself to a trusted circle of acquaintances at work and family at home.

It is very difficult for them to express their opinions, so they either say something quietly behind their backs, or are generally silent about their views. Due to unspokenness, they may develop depressive states, as well as throat diseases and bronchial asthma.

Test to determine the level of shyness

Read the following statements and tick the number that apply to you:

1. The company of outside strangers is unpleasant for me and causes me tension.
2. I always feel uncomfortable when I communicate with people.
3. I feel uncomfortable in the presence of strangers. With them, I feel helpless.
4. During festive events and corporate parties, I feel terribly uncomfortable and cannot relax.
5. During a conversation with colleagues and acquaintances, I am constantly afraid to say something stupid.
6. I get jitters when I have to talk to a famous or authoritative person.
7. The presence of members of the opposite sex in my usual company or environment unsettles me.
8. I try to avoid direct eye contact with other people.
9. I always try to avoid conflicts, avoid quarrels and disputes.
10. I constantly think about what else I could say or do in a certain situation, although in that situation no ideas came to my mind.

If you have come to the conclusion that six or more statements matches your behavior, in which case it can be argued that your level of shyness is quite high. If you have chosen only two or three answers, you can be sure that you have a perfectly normal level of shyness, which is common to almost all people.

How to get rid of shyness?

1. Watch how your shyness manifests itself. Think about what was the main reason for her appearance: peculiarities of upbringing, frequent criticism, ugly appearance, failures in deeds and actions. Objectively evaluate whether you can eliminate the causes of shyness on your own or you will need the help of specialists.
2. Think about how confident a person who does not show signs of shyness should be. Try to try on his image and fix in your memory a feeling of confidence.
3. Look at yourself in the mirror. What is it about yourself that you can't accept? What do you hate about yourself? Analyze whether this feature is really worth the hatred and rejection that you experience? Engage in auto-training or, forcing yourself to accept the way you are.
4. Learn to look at yourself and your behavior from the outside. Be objective. Don't take yourself too seriously. Learn to laugh at yourself.
5. Keep a journal of your own achievements, where you write down all your victories, all the moments in your life when you achieved the desired result without shyness with self-confidence.
6. Observe confident people: how they behave, how they walk, how they look, how they talk. Copy their behavior, gestures, gait, manner of speaking.

If our tips are not enough to reduce your level of shyness, take

Shyness Test

Below is a test developed by scientists at Stanford University. I recommend answering the questions of this test after a month, six months or a year of work on yourself in order to check how significant success you have achieved.

Complete the test quickly, then go back and reread it more carefully to determine exactly how shyness is affecting you.

Are you shy?

1. Do you consider yourself shy?

1 - yes, 2 - no.

2. If so, have you always been shy?

1 - yes, 2 - no.

3. If you answered “no” to question 1, was there a period in your life when you felt shy?

1 - yes, 2 - no.

If you answered yes to any of the three questions, please continue with the test.

The main properties of shyness:

4. What is the basis of your assumption that you are a shy person?

1 - you are always shy at any time and in any situation

2 - you are shy in most situations

3 - you are shy from time to time

5. How shy are you?

1 - extremely shy

2 - very shy

3 - very shy

4 - moderately shy

5 - somewhat shy

6 - only slightly shy

6. How often do you feel (have you experienced) a feeling of shyness?

1 - daily

2 - almost every day

3 - often, almost every other day

4 - 1-2 times a week

5 - less than once a week

6 - rarely, once a month or less

7. How desirable is it for you to be shy?

1 - very undesirable

2 - undesirable

3 - I don't care about this state

4 - desirable

5 - highly desirable

8. How shy are you compared to people in your circle (same age, gender)?

1 - much more shy

2 - more shy

3 - about the same shy

4 - less shy

5 - much less shy

9. Do you (or have you ever had) problems caused by shyness?

1 - yes, often

2 - yes, sometimes

3 - rarely

4 - never

10. When you feel shy, can you hide it from others?

1 - yes, always

2 - sometimes

3 - usually not

11. Are you introverted or extroverted?

1 - strong introversion

2 - moderate introversion

3 - slight introversion

4 - slight extraversion

5 - moderate extraversion

6 - strong extraversion

12. Do you feel shy when you are alone?

1 - yes, 2 - no.

If yes, please describe when, how, why:

13. Have you ever experienced discomfort when you are alone?

1 - yes, 2 - no If yes, describe when, how, why:

The attitude of others to your shyness:

14. How do others evaluate your shyness?

1 - overly shy

2 - very shy

3 - very shy

4 - moderately shy

5 - somewhat shy

6 - slightly shy

7 - not shy

8 - don't know

9 - inappropriate definition

Using the options above, answer the question if the following people consider you shy:

- brothers and sisters

- Friends

- constant girlfriend (friend), spouse (wife)

- student friends

- neighbours

– mentors or employers, colleagues who know you well

15. Have others called your shyness indifference, detachment, poise, or something else?

Describe in more detail:

______________________________

Internal causes of shyness:

16. What could be causing you to be shy?

- anxiety about negative evaluation

- fear of being rejected

- lack of self-confidence

Lack of certain social skills (describe in more detail):

______________________________

- fear of intimacy with others

- preference to be alone

– your interests and hobbies are condemned by society

- inadequacy, defects:

______________________________

– other reasons:

______________________________

External causes of shyness:

17. Determine which situations make you feel self-conscious.

– any social contacts

- presence in a large group of people

- presence in a small group of people united by one goal that is not related to entertainment (for example, at a work meeting or in a student group)

– communication with a small group of people having a rest (at a party, dancing)

- one-on-one conversation with a person of the same sex

- one-on-one conversations with a person of the opposite sex

- you demonstrate that you are worse than others in some way (for example, asking for help)

- talking to people of higher social status

- situations in which you need to defend your rights

- you are in the center of attention of a large audience

– you are the focus of a small group

- you are evaluated, compared with others, criticized

- any situation that affects you personally

- a situation in which sexual intimacy is possible

18. Go back to the items that were selected in the previous task, and remember if your shyness manifested itself in similar situations last month.

1 - yes, and very strongly

2 - yes, quite a lot

3 - moderately

4 - just a little

5 - no, never

19. Who are the people with whom you are shy?

– parents

- brothers or sisters

- other relatives

- Friends

- strangers or strangers

- Foreigners

– people in power (police officers, teachers, bosses at work)

- people with great knowledge

- people are much older than you

- people much younger than you

– members of the opposite sex when they are in a group

– members of your gender when they are in a group

– members of the opposite sex when you are alone

– members of your gender when you are alone

20. Return to the points selected in the previous task and remember if your shyness in the past month was caused by contact with one of these people (or several).

0 - no, only last month

1 - yes, and very strongly

2 - yes, quite a lot

3 - moderately

4 - only slightly

Manifestations of shyness:

21. What signs do you use to determine that you are shy?

– according to your own feelings, thoughts

- according to their behavior in this situation

- according to the reaction of others

22. What physiological reactions reflect your shyness?

0 - never feel like this

1 - these reactions are normal for me

2 - they are expressed very strongly

- blush

- increased heart rate

- discomfort in the stomach

- internal trembling

- heartbeat

- dry lips

- trembling of limbs

- labored breathing

- fatigue

– other reactions:

______________________________

23. What thoughts and feelings does shyness cause in you?

0 - these thoughts and feelings never visit me

1 - they are common to me

2 - they capture me completely

– positive feelings (e.g. feeling happy with yourself)

- thoughts about nothing (dreams, vague sensations)

- excessive "obsession" with oneself, introspection

- unpleasant thoughts (“the situation is terrible, what a pity that I ended up in it”)

– distracting thoughts (I think about what will happen when the situation changes)

negative feelings (feelings of inadequacy, insecurity, inferiority)

– thoughts about shyness (about what it is, how to overcome it)

- worrying about what others think

other thoughts and feelings

______________________________

24. If you have ever experienced a feeling of shyness, how did it manifest itself?

0 - I don't like it

1 - this is typical for me

2 - it manifests itself in a strong form

- refusal to interact with people

- inability to look directly into the eyes

silence (unwillingness to speak)

- stuttering

- incoherent speech

- demonstrative behavior

- evasion of responsible actions

- other manifestations:

______________________________

Consequences of shyness:

25. What are the negative effects of shyness on you?

– none

– creates social problems: I find it difficult to make new friends, communicate with people

- leads to feelings of loneliness, depression

interferes with other people's positive assessment of my abilities

- causes difficulties when it is necessary to defend one's rights, to be assertive, to express an opinion that is not shared by others

- contributes to the wrong negative assessment of me by other people (for example, they may decide that I am a snob, unfriendly or weak person)

- causes "fixation" on their thoughts and feelings

26. What are the benefits of being shy for you?

– none

- creates an image of a modest, reserved person

- helps to avoid conflicts

- provides a comfortable state of security

- gives the opportunity to observe from the side, act carefully and carefully

- helps to avoid negative evaluation from other people (they think that I am unobtrusive, non-aggressive, do not have excessive ambitions)

- makes me stand out from others

- promotes privacy

Conclusions:

27. Is it possible to overcome your shyness?

1 - yes, 2 - no

28. Do you want to seriously work on overcoming shyness?

1 - yes, of course

2 - yes, maybe

3 - don't know, not sure yet 4 - no

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From the author's book

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From the author's book

From the author's book

VM test (indicative test of school maturity - verbal thinking) I. Irazek Which animal is bigger - a horse or a dog? Horse = 0, incorrect answer = -5. In the morning we have breakfast, and at noon ...? We have lunch. We eat soup, pasta and meat = 0. Have lunch, dinner, sleep, etc. wrong