Paul McGee
SUMO. shut up and do it
Paul McGee
(Shut Up, Move On)
The straight talking guide to succeeding in life
Illustrations by Fiona Osborne
Published with permission from John Wiley & Sons and Alexander Korzhenevsky Literary Agency
Legal support of the publishing house is provided by the law firm "Vegas-Lex"
© All Rights Reserved. Authorized translation from the English language edition published by John Wiley & Sons Limited. Responsibility for the accuracy of the translation rests solely with Mann, Ivanov and Ferber and is not the responsibility of John Wiley & Sons Limited. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form without the written permission of the original copyright holder, John Wiley & Sons Limited
© Translation into Russian, edition in Russian, design. LLC "Mann, Ivanov and Ferber", 2016
This book is well complemented by:
Eric Bertrand Larssen
Dan Waldschmidt
Les Hewitt, Jack Canfield and Mark Victor Hansen
Paul, nicknamed The Philosopher, with admiration and deep gratitude for his friendship, wise advice and funny moments - from the guy S.U.M.O.
Foreword
This was in the spring of 2005. I was sitting at the kitchen table, looking out at the garden from the window, and making final edits to a draft book about S.U.M.O. It was my first time working with Capstone, it was interesting, but no one was under any illusions. My editor knew he was taking a big risk by releasing a book like this. Prior to this, thirteen other publishers had already refused to publish it. One editor told me bluntly: “No one will come to the store for a book whose title tells you to shut up and act. The name should be attractive, but you, Paul, the opposite is true.
Although I wrote with passion, I had serious misgivings. Will anyone take seriously a book that encourages fruitful thinking, claims to stay in able hippo- is this normal, and offers to completely forget about Doris Day? I had a lot of doubts, especially after talking with friends who sympathetically asked: “What will you do if the book fails? How do you deal with disappointment?" Why do we need enemies if there are such friends?
My mentor and best friend Paul Sandham was increasingly optimistic: “Man, you have a quirky and unique style. It won't be to everyone's taste, but you'll see, a lot more people will appreciate it than you imagine. Just share the stories of not only ups, but also downs. It will change the book." That's exactly what I did.
Looks like Paul was right. Readers who recognized my biography began to write to me to tell about their experience. We have never met, but we have a lot in common. We are not celebrities. The paparazzi don't follow us. Our photos are not published in magazines. The yellow papers won't gossip that we've gained weight or lost weight. But each of us has our own story. We are equally important, even if our biographies are completely different. In the end, we are all in the same boat. And it's called life.
We dream. We are disappointed. We hope. We experience pain. We are falling. We get up. We move on. We drop our hands. We wake up happy. We wake up miserable. We rejoice in the company of friends and relatives. We fall into despair from loneliness and a sense of our own worthlessness. Sometimes life seems unimaginably beautiful, and sometimes - absolutely meaningless. Human relationships are the greatest source of joy and pain. We enjoy the special moments of life, but most of the time we just don't notice them. We feel that we are capable of much, but we are always haunted by doubts. We surprise ourselves. We stop believing in ourselves.
You and I may differ in race, age, and education, but we still have a lot in common. It seems that the readers of this book have found just what unites them. Deep inside, I hoped that would happen. I don't just write about the philosophy of S.U.M.O. I'm talking about her. At the time of writing this preface, I have traveled to forty countries with lectures. Tens of thousands of people listened to my speeches. Some people laughed at me and my ideas. But most listened to them. I will say without false modesty, my story has inspired very different people. Not everyone understood my humor. Later you will find out why. But many agreed with some, if not all, of my statements.
In this book, Paul McGee, a best-selling author and one of the UK's leading speakers, explains how to find motivation and cope with adversity. Author's technique S.U.M.O. (Shut Up, Move On®) has been helping thousands of people change their lives for ten years. In this book you will find actionable recommendations, inspiring stories of real people, ideas for successful change. Published in Russian for the first time.
Introduction
You don't have to be sick to feel better.
Eric BernI have been in school for thirteen years. During this time I learned a lot. He learned to count and use a Bunsen burner, became disillusioned with carpentry, learned some facts about dinosaurs and realized how sad life was under the yoke of the Roman Empire. However, if you think about it, I learned little about life and did not learn how to cope with its problems. I understood the insides of the frog, but I did not understand myself and those around me. I learned to get up when the teacher enters the classroom and do my homework on time to avoid trouble. But no one taught me how to set goals, control emotions, or resolve conflicts. School just prepared me for final exams, but not for real life. I am glad that a lot has changed in school education since then, but that was my experience.
Imagine that a few years ago you asked me: “Would you like your life to be a bright and amazing adventure that would captivate you and your loved ones?” Then I would confidently answer: “Of course!” However, if you asked how I'm going to do it, in response I would start to mumble and in the end admit that I don't know. But over the past few years, I've learned a lot. Now my answer would be specific.
You will know my answer in the next seven chapters. Before writing this book, I studied psychology for twenty-five years, ran my own business, and, more importantly, observed tens of thousands of people. I am a speaker, I conduct seminars about "change, motivation and relationships." It helped me understand which techniques work in our lives and which do not. I have traveled all over the world from Tanzania to Todmorden, from Hong Kong to Halifax, from India to Islington and from Malaysia to Manchester. I realized that people are the same everywhere, regardless of country and culture. They share the same dreams, hopes and problems. They want to live better, be happy and provide children with a great future. Of course, there are some differences, but they are only external, in fact, we are all extremely similar.
Why S.U.M.O.?
I heard the term S.U.M.O. a few years ago. I forgot who said it, but I remember the transcript: Shut Up, Move On. To some, this phrase will probably seem aggressive, but let me explain what I mean by it. I'm not suggesting that people just "humble up" or "pull themselves together" (although in some cases both are necessary). It also doesn't mean to "understand and forgive" or "ignore reality and accept life as it is."
For me S.U.M.O. expresses the essence of the actions that are necessary to achieve success and feel happy.
As a child, I learned the code of the Green Cross. This code teaches students how to be safe on the road. It contains the phrase: "Stop, look and listen." I tell people "Shut up" so they stopped not for long, made a small pause in business, looked for your life and listened to thoughts and feelings. Yes, be prepared to listen to other people as well, but be sure to listen to yourself. Escape for a while from the noisy, fast and business everyday life. Be alone with your own thoughts for a while.
“Shut up” means “let go”. As you read this book, you will realize that some of your thoughts are closely intertwined with your habits. My goal is to help you figure out whether your habitual worldview helps you or only hinders you.
In recent years, we have sometimes replaced the order "Shut up" with the phrase "Stop and think." This expression is less provocative and also reflects the essence of the S.U.M.O. It makes sense to pause stop and think who we are, where we're going, and what we need (or don't need) to get there.
The second part of the term S.U.M.O. “Do” also has many meanings. Thus, I encourage you: no matter what the past was, the future can be completely different. Tomorrow has a chance to be different than today - if you want it, of course. “Do” is a call to look into the future, see chances and prospects and not become a hostage to current circumstances. This is a call to action. It is quite difficult to stop dreaming and start doing, but I will tell you where to start.
The expression S.U.M.O. lies at the heart of my personal philosophy of how to get the most out of life. This is a provocative term, but it can push and inspire you to accomplish both in work and in your personal life. I hope you remember it. In Latin S.U.M.O. means to choose, and I sincerely believe that this book will help you make wise choices in all areas.
I wanted to make ideas memorable. For example, I am sure that in no book you will meet the call "Forget about Doris Day" (Ditch Doris Day). I have also included "Personal Stories" sections. You don't have to read them, but, in my opinion, they become a background to my ideas, make them brighter and more vital. In them, I talk about how I tried to put my own ideas into practice, what difficulties I encountered and what came of it.
I will ask you questions so that you consolidate the material. Even if you think about them even for a moment, the book will already become much more interesting, instructive and valuable for you.
I tried very hard to make the material simple and accessible (and even overdid it: now my principles are explained to students in elementary and middle grades). However, behind the seeming simplicity are hidden effective tools and proven methodologies: cognitive behavioral therapy, solution-oriented therapy, the method of positive assessment of the situation and positive psychology research. Relax: you don't need to understand these theories to understand the book. No matter how many similar books you have already read, my main goal is to convey to you thoughts and information that you can apply in practice. Without delay.
End of introductory segment.
TanyaLazareva1996
Rated the book
I know that many people are skeptical about books on motivation, and I, frankly, have recently seen that it is difficult to find something worthwhile in this genre. Indeed, in books on self-development, very often they say the same words, or different words, but the same thing, pouring from empty to empty. They write a lot of superfluous things, but essentially say little, or say nothing new at all. But personally, I read them, because sometimes they still allow you to look at some seemingly obvious fact from a new angle, to notice something that you did not notice before. In addition, they inspire me, allow me to believe in myself. Of course, books will not do anything for you, and nothing in life will change from reading them, but they can push.
I liked that Paul McGee in his book focuses on the fact that everything in our life depends on ourselves. And only we ourselves can change everything. He considers action to be the most important. If you do not start to act, move towards your goal, take at least the first steps, no books will help you with this. He does not write about any mantras, as in esotericism, about the power of thought and faith, that the main thing is to want "And then the whole universe will help your desire come true." No, he just says that just wanting is not enough. And positive thoughts are not always needed, sometimes it is worth succumbing to despondency. But anyway. Until you get up and take action, nothing in your life will change. Paul writes extremely simply, but nevertheless it is inspiring. The book encourages action. She won’t do anything for you, but she pushes you to just get up and do it. Paul writes absolutely honestly and frankly that his advice is obvious and simple, but sometimes people need them to take the first step, gain determination and take action. Fighting fears, self-doubt, laziness and procrastination. For me personally, there was a very important thought about the need to constantly leave the comfort zone. Of course, I heard about this before, but I didn’t understand why, why such efforts on myself are needed, when you can quietly and calmly continue to sit in your shell. And just then Paul explains that if a person tries not to leave his comfort zone all his life, he avoids any stressful moments, important meetings, public speaking, etc. If he gives in to fears and simply runs away from all difficulties, then he degrades. A person cannot develop, being all the time in a comfortable environment, only constantly going through difficulties, overcoming himself, constantly leaving the comfort zone, a person can grow and improve internally. For me it was somewhat of a revelation. All my life I have avoided various difficulties (concerning people). I'd rather not go to a friend's birthday if there's someone I don't know. I'd rather not go at all to the section where I have long wanted to enroll, if I do not find someone who will keep me company. I'd rather wander through unfamiliar streets for two hours than ask for directions. I can't find a job because I'm afraid to call. Just call and arrange an interview. At the thought of the interview itself, I am completely seized by panic.
In general, after Paul's words about the need to constantly leave the comfort zone, I decided to listen. And having overpowered myself a couple of times, I realized that each time it becomes easier to overcome fear. And then you yourself are happy that you could do it, you see how many opportunities appear, acquaintances, and how useful it is not to run away from people. Confidence, faith in one's own strength is added. We need to act.
The main idea of McGee "Shut up and do" can be explained as follows: "shut up" - stop, think, listen to yourself. "Do" - i.e. concentrate on achieving certain results, start taking action. According to McGee, between these two points, people usually fall into the "Behemoth State", that is, a state of disappointment, sadness, despondency. "It's not always okay to feel okay. Sometimes in order to move on you have to wallow in a problem, reach an emotional bottom and honestly evaluate your feelings." For me, this thought was also new enough that sometimes it’s even good to get depressed. The main thing is to get out of it in time :) The author also talks about how often we fall into the state of the victim, give in to emotions, and explains why this should not be done and how to deal with it.
I also liked that Paul always gives stories from life, and explains all the points of the book with his own examples, in my opinion, this makes the book more interesting. The book is practical, very easy to read, written with humor, so I can definitely recommend it!
Rated the book
Paul McGee "S.U.M.O. Shut up and do it" | 224 pages.
Something I recently, when I read non-fiction, I specifically look for "water" and unnecessary information. But here, everything is perfect. Even those stories that were personal to the author and that he himself said, you can read or not, greatly diversified the book.
Paul McGee is a speaker who wants people to always live well and strive for their goals, and that they would have fun at the same time. And I, by the way, got great pleasure from reading his book in a day, with a very strange and interesting title.
Everything seems to be banal: let's live better, strive - you will do it, do not lose heart. But I didn't find the book boring.
Firstly. A very original title and a great play on these titles, like "Hippo state is normal" or "Forget Doris Day" (By the way, special thanks to Doris Day for the author, I found her songs, now her Everybody Loves a Lover is on repeat!). The author has his own names for some types of people, and the most original is SUMO. In short, this is Shut up, move on - shut up and do it). But on the pages and cover of the book we see a sumo wrestler. Well, it's cool, don't you agree?
Secondly. Very live content. I love that feeling when it seems to you that the author is sitting next to you and talking. Very very belly content. There were footnotes when "Here I feel that you did not take this test, so you will not achieve anything." Yes, there were tests and various footnotes to answer questions. There is a lot to analyze and think about.
Thirdly. Really motivates! I really wanted to change myself right now, to go towards the fulfillment of goals (and I have a lot of them, for a minute, now, because now the period begins when a lot of things need to be decided for my life). Paul McGee, I'll try to get out of the Behemoth state and pull myself together!
The book is excellent, for a long time I have not read such non-fiction, which I will like everything from the content to the cover. I advise everyone!
I will put 5/5!
Paul McGee
SUMO. shut up and do it
Paul McGee
(Shut Up, Move On)
The straight talking guide to succeeding in life
Illustrations by Fiona Osborne
Published with permission from John Wiley & Sons and Alexander Korzhenevsky Literary Agency
Legal support of the publishing house is provided by the law firm "Vegas-Lex"
© All Rights Reserved. Authorized translation from the English language edition published by John Wiley & Sons Limited. Responsibility for the accuracy of the translation rests solely with Mann, Ivanov and Ferber and is not the responsibility of John Wiley & Sons Limited. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form without the written permission of the original copyright holder, John Wiley & Sons Limited
© Translation into Russian, edition in Russian, design. LLC "Mann, Ivanov and Ferber", 2016
* * *This book is well complemented by:
No self pity
Eric Bertrand Larssen
Be the best version of yourself
Dan Waldschmidt
whole life
Les Hewitt, Jack Canfield and Mark Victor Hansen
Paul, nicknamed The Philosopher, with admiration and deep gratitude for his friendship, wise advice and funny moments - from the guy S.U.M.O.
Foreword
This was in the spring of 2005. I was sitting at the kitchen table, looking out at the garden from the window, and making final edits to a draft book about S.U.M.O. It was my first time working with Capstone, it was interesting, but no one was under any illusions. My editor knew he was taking a big risk by releasing a book like this. Prior to this, thirteen other publishers had already refused to publish it. One editor told me bluntly: “No one will come to the store for a book whose title tells you to shut up and act. The name should be attractive, but you, Paul, the opposite is true.
Although I wrote with passion, I had serious misgivings. Will anyone take seriously a book that encourages fruitful thinking, claims to stay in able hippo- is this normal, and offers to completely forget about Doris Day? I had a lot of doubts, especially after talking with friends who sympathetically asked: “What will you do if the book fails? How do you deal with disappointment?" Why do we need enemies if there are such friends?
My mentor and best friend Paul Sandham was increasingly optimistic: “Man, you have a quirky and unique style. It won't be to everyone's taste, but you'll see, a lot more people will appreciate it than you imagine. Just share the stories of not only ups, but also downs. It will change the book." That's exactly what I did.
Looks like Paul was right. Readers who recognized my biography began to write to me to tell about their experience. We have never met, but we have a lot in common. We are not celebrities. The paparazzi don't follow us. Our photos are not published in magazines. The yellow papers won't gossip that we've gained weight or lost weight. But each of us has our own story. We are equally important, even if our biographies are completely different. In the end, we are all in the same boat. And it's called life.
We dream. We are disappointed. We hope. We experience pain. We are falling. We get up. We move on. We drop our hands. We wake up happy. We wake up miserable. We rejoice in the company of friends and relatives. We fall into despair from loneliness and a sense of our own worthlessness. Sometimes life seems unimaginably beautiful, and sometimes - absolutely meaningless. Human relationships are the greatest source of joy and pain. We enjoy the special moments of life, but most of the time we just don't notice them. We feel that we are capable of much, but we are always haunted by doubts. We surprise ourselves. We stop believing in ourselves.
You and I may differ in race, age, and education, but we still have a lot in common. It seems that the readers of this book have found just what unites them. Deep inside, I hoped that would happen. I don't just write about the philosophy of S.U.M.O. I'm talking about her. At the time of writing this preface, I have traveled to forty countries with lectures. Tens of thousands of people listened to my speeches. Some people laughed at me and my ideas. But most listened to them. I will say without false modesty, my story has inspired very different people. Not everyone understood my humor. Later you will find out why. But many agreed with some, if not all, of my statements.
Your world is radically different from what it was in 2005. Do you use Facebook? Me too. Mark Zuckerberg only developed it in 2004. In 2005, it was available to US students. Now this network is second in number only to China and India. In 2005, you called people friends because you really knew them.
What about Twitter? I like to tweet. In 2005, no one knew about him. Why? Because Twitter only launched in July 2006.
What about YouTube? In 2005, the domain already existed, but the videos began to be uploaded only after some time. In the UK, YouTube launched on my wife's birthday, July 19, 2007. To be honest, I doubt Helen's birthday had anything to do with this event, but I'm so sorry that I didn't film our romantic dinner at the monkey cages at Chester Zoo that day! If I did, you could see how happy she was to relax next to the gorillas and baboons, eating sandwiches, cheese and pork pies (yes, you guessed it, I'm from Northern England).
Everyone remembered the "financial crisis" as an event of the 1980s and early 1990s. Few economists in 2005 could have predicted the biggest financial crash that occurred three years later.
In 2005, you most likely checked the clock, wished you had a camera handy to capture a special moment, and simply hung up when the conversation got boring. Principles of S.U.M.O. appeared in a world without iPhones. There were no applications. Back then, it was hard to see a photo of the food your friend ate yesterday. How did we live then? Don't know.
Due to the technological leap in our world, there are many opportunities for communication and chances for conflict. Types of entertainment has become hundreds of times more. Why think when you can tweet? Why talk to loved ones when it's easier to text "friends" you've never met? Why take care of kids when it's easier to give them headphones and put them in front of an iPad?
"Change" is not the right word to describe the last decade. It is obvious. No, it would be more correct to say "inexorability". An inexorable amount of change happening at an inexorable pace, so stopping means stepping back. No previous generation had to live at such a relentless pace as we do now. For many of us, life has become an endless ride with broken brakes.
This is our reality and that's why I think the idea of S.U.M.O. is even more relevant and important now than it was ten years ago. And that's why I think so. I will list a few factors that will help us maximize our potential and take advantage of the opportunities that life gives us.
Reflections. Essentially S.U.M.O. - this is a call to turn off the internal autopilot; just stop and pause. Our fast-paced life, full of various activities and entertainment, resists such decisions. People are willing to pay thousands of dollars to get away from the noise and live in peace for a while. S.U.M.O. will help you honestly and practically analyze certain aspects of your life. Some thoughts will convince you that you are doing everything right, while others will make you think about setting priorities and further tactics of action. S.U.M.O. makes life more conscious, thoughtful and valuable.
As the Roman poet Publius Syr said, “wisdom comes not with age, but with reflection.” Introspection improves self-awareness.
Relaxation. Constant change can tire anyone. Not only physically, but, much more seriously, mentally. Due to new technologies we are always available. And this means that now it is incredibly difficult for us to turn off the phone. I don't know about women, but I see guys talking on the phone at urinals all the time. I have heard very funny dialogues when I stopped by need at gas stations in the UK.
We can't afford to pause and take a breather. More and more people are beginning to complain not only of moral fatigue, but also of sleep problems.
How to find motivation and cope with difficulties? Author's technique S.U.M.O.(ShutUp, MoveOn) has already helped thousands of people change their lives. Here you will find actionable recommendations and ideas for successful change.
The text is written in a simple and accessible language, but behind the seeming simplicity are hidden effective tools and proven methodologies: cognitive-behavioral psychotherapy, solution-oriented therapy, the method of positive assessment of the situation and positive psychology research.
Why S.U.M.O.?
The phrase behind the S.U.M.O. (ShutUp, MoveOn - shut up and do it) may seem aggressive to many, but on the very first pages of his book, the author explains what exactly he puts into it.
Paul McGee:
I tell people to "Shut up" so they stop for a while, take a little pause in business, look at their lives and listen to thoughts and feelings. Be alone with your own thoughts for a while. It makes sense to pause to stop and think about who we are, where we are going and what we need (or do not need) to get to the goal.
“Shut up” means “let go”. Some of your thoughts are closely intertwined with habits. My goal is to help you figure out whether your habitual worldview helps you or only hinders you.
The second part of the term S.U.M.O. - "Do" - also has many meanings. Thus, I encourage you: no matter what the past was, the future can be completely different. Tomorrow has a chance to be different than today - if that's what you want, of course.
“Do” is a call to look into the future, see chances and prospects and not become a hostage to current circumstances. This is a call to action. It's quite difficult to stop dreaming and start doing, but I'll tell you where to start.
The expression S.U.M.O. lies at the heart of my personal philosophy of how to get the most out of life. This is a provocative term, but it can push and inspire you to accomplish both in work and in your personal life.
MEDR model
This S.U.M.O. help us understand how we think. Thinking is almost like breathing: most of the time we are not aware that we are doing it. People don't wake up in the morning thinking, "I think I'll breathe today," just as they don't pay much attention to their way of thinking.
So why is this so important? What is the connection between my thoughts and what is happening in life?
Our thinking (that is, internal dialogue) influences our actions, namely they determine the results.
Imagine that a colleague has asked you to prepare a presentation for their department about your work. Your first thought: “I hate doing presentations, I’m always very nervous.” This offer scares you, and you refuse, citing a heavy load. What is the result? You are still afraid of presentations and have not helped your colleague. You have just entered the MEDR scheme:
Thought - Emotion(or feelings) - Actions(or behavior) - Result(or consequences)
This can be shown in a diagram:
William James, one of the founders of modern psychology, said: You can change your life by changing your attitude ". Quite simply, when you think differently, you feel differently, which means you behave differently and end up with different results.
