What gestures can betray a person if he is lying? These are gestures associated with touching hands to the face. An experiment was conducted with nurses who, in a role-playing game, were instructed to tell patients lies about their condition. Those sisters who had to lie were more likely to use "hand to face" gestures than those who told the truth to their patients. Now consider the various hand-to-face gestures and the conditions under which they occur.
1. Touching the Nose
In essence, touching the nose is a subtle, disguised version of the previous gesture.
It can be expressed in a few light touches on the dimple under the nose, or it can be expressed in one quick, almost imperceptible touch.
One explanation for the nature of this gesture is that when bad thoughts enter the mind, the subconscious tells the hand to cover the mouth, but at the very last moment, out of a desire to disguise this gesture, the hand is pulled away from the mouth, and a light touch to the nose is obtained.
2. Collar Pull
Researchers have found that lying causes an itchy sensation in the delicate muscles of the face and neck, and scratching is required to soothe these sensations.
This seems to be an acceptable explanation for why some people pull back their collar when they lie and suspect that their deception has been discovered. It also looks like the liar has sweat on his neck when he feels that you have suspected a hoax.
This gesture is also used when a person is angry or upset, while he pulls the collar from the neck; to cool it with fresh air.
3. Rubbing the Eyelid
This gesture is caused by the desire in the brain to hide from the deceit, suspicion, or lies it faces, or the desire to avoid looking into the eyes of the person it is telling a lie.
4. Neck scratching
In this case, the person scratches the place under the earlobe with the index finger of the right hand.
This gesture speaks of the doubt and uncertainty of a person who says: "I'm not sure that I agree with you."
It is especially striking if it is contrary to verbal language, for example, if a person says something like: "I perfectly understand how you feel."
5. Fingers in Mouth
The person puts his fingers in his mouth in a state of great oppression. It is man's unconscious attempt to return to that safe, unclouded time of infancy.
A small child sucks his finger, and as for an adult, in addition to his finger, he puts into his mouth such objects as cigarettes, pipes, pens, and the like.
While the gestures associated with covering the mouth with the hand indicate deceit, the fingers in the mouth indicate an internal need for approval and support.
Therefore, when this gesture appears, it is necessary to support the person or assure him with guarantees.
6. Scratching and Rubbing the Ear
This gesture is caused by the listener's desire to isolate himself from words by placing his hand near or above the ear.
This gesture is an adult modification of the gesture of a small child when he plugs his ears so as not to listen to the reproaches of his parents.
Other options for touching the ear are rubbing the pinna, drilling into the ear (with the tip of a finger), pulling on the earlobe, or bending the ear in an attempt to cover the ear opening.
This last gesture indicates that the person has heard enough and wants, perhaps, to speak out.
7. Mouth Protection with Hand
Protecting the mouth with the hand is one of the few gestures of an adult and has the same meaning as a child's gesture.
The hand covers the mouth and the thumb is pressed to the cheek, while the brain at the subconscious level sends signals to hold back the spoken words.
Sometimes it may be only a few fingers at the mouth or even a fist, but the meaning of the gesture remains the same.
The gesture "protecting the mouth with a hand" should be distinguished from evaluative gestures.
If this gesture is used by a person at the time of speech, this indicates that he is telling a lie.
However, if he covers his mouth with his hand when you speak and he listens, it means that he thinks you are lying or disagrees with you.
+ 17 additional rules
1. The expression of emotions and reactions is slowed down compared to how a person usually behaves. It starts late, runs wilder, and ends very abruptly.2. Some time passes between words and expression of emotions. For example, they tell you that your work is done brilliantly and only then, after realizing what they said, do they smile. When a person who speaks the truth has an emotional reaction that will take place simultaneously with the words.
3. What the person says is completely inconsistent with the expression on his face. For example, when you say the phrase "I love you", the person becomes as if he had eaten a slice of lemon.
4. When expressing emotions, not the whole person is involved, but only a part. For example, a person smiles only with his mouth, without using the muscles of the cheeks, eyes and nose. The eyes in this case really become a mirror of the soul, because it is very difficult to learn how to specifically control their expression, for some it is impossible.
5. When a person tells you a lie, he apparently tries to take up as little space as possible, pressing his arms to himself and one to the other - his legs.
6. The person will avoid meeting your eyes.
7. A person touches or scratches his nose, ears. IN rare cases touch with an open palm to the area of \u200b\u200bthe heart on the chest.
8. The person will "defend" instead of "attacking" in conversation.
9. A lying person may try to turn their body or head away from you.
10. He may unconsciously place some objects between you, creating a kind of "protective barrier".
11. A liar can use your words to make an answer very similar to a question. "Did you break the far window on the second floor?" "No, it wasn't me who broke the far window on the second floor."
12. You are not given a clear answer to the question, instead they are given a "floating" answer that can be understood in different ways.
13. Your interlocutor may talk more than necessary, adding unnecessary details. He is uncomfortable when there is a pause in the conversation.
14. When a person lies, they may omit pronouns and speak in a monotonous voice.
15. A person can speak softly, but at the same time grammatically incorrect. Offers will be confused.
16. If you believe that you are being lied to, try changing the subject of the conversation. If a person is really lying to you, he will willingly change the subject and will look more relaxed.
17. The person uses humor and sarcasm to get around the topic.
By these signs, it is quite easy to determine if someone is lying to you. But, of course, do not forget that there are exceptions.
Many people are good at hiding their feelings and emotions. Words can not express much, not to tell, to hide. But our hands usually give out everything that words are silent about. We may not even have time to think yet, but our hands are already ahead of thought. has been known for a long time, and in recent years more and more attention has been paid to the study of this area of knowledge.
Our hands are a unique system. One wave of the hand can say a lot. But, there are such gestures that you need to be able to read in order to accurately determine what kind of internal state of a person they express.
First of all, by the position and movement of the hands, the psychology of gestures unmistakably determines how confident a person is in himself, his words and actions. For example, if a person rubs his hands together, this may mean that he is very pleased with himself, completely confident in what he is doing, and hopes that his words and actions will lead to the desired result.
Similar in meaning can be considered a gesture of stroking something that is pleasant to the touch with an open palm. Such a gesture indicates that a person is in a good mood, he is open to people and information, he is confident in himself.
If the hands rest on the hips, this means that the person feels superior and deliberately demonstrates it. This is a gesture of challenge that he throws at other people and the surrounding reality.
The psychology of gestures knows much more than the positions of the hands, which indicate mental discomfort, insecurity and timidity.
Such gestures include movements aimed at hiding the hands. For example, if a person puts his hands in his pockets, this is a sign that he is not sure of something, is trying to hide his difficulty and, in some way, hide his emotional state. If a person hides his hands behind his back, the psychology of gestures says that he is experiencing a difficult situation, some timidity, completely refuses to take decisive action.
Crossed on the chest The psychology of gestures regards hands as a desire of a person to isolate himself from what is happening outside his inner world, to hide and isolate himself. This is the so-called defensive reaction to the difficulties he faces. A similar gesture is crossed arms supporting the upper body and leaning on something. This position means internal uncertainty and a desire to find support. The same gestures can mean complete indifference or rejection by a person of what is being said to him. If your interlocutor crosses his arms, then he either does not listen to you at all, or does not agree with you on something.
The psychology of gestures distinguishes into a separate group movements associated with touching the face or head. Basically, such gestures also indicate a person’s uncertainty about something. For example, a straight index finger touches the lips, which means that the person is not sure what he is saying, he is trying to find the right words or find help. All gestures aimed at covering the face with hands are regarded by the psychology of gestures as an attempt to hide one's inner state, feelings and emotions. But with an erasing movement from the forehead, a person, as it were, drives away bad thoughts, absent-mindedness and worries about something.
Such gestures include those that the psychology of gestures classifies as " lie movements". For example, in a conversation, a person often tries to cover his mouth with his hand. This is usually disguised as a cough or thoughtfulness. Thus, the subconscious, as it were, is trying to make him stop talking.
The gesture of lightly touching the nose often betrays the liar immediately. Characteristic for people who tell a lie and a gesture of rubbing the eyelids. Thus, a person, as it were, tries to stop looking into the eyes of the interlocutor.
Not all gestures can be interpreted unambiguously. The psychology of gestures says that some particular movement may be inherent in this particular person, and this does not mean that he is lying or nervous.
You can accurately determine the internal state only when you know a particular person well and all his habitual movements. The psychology of gestures of a complete stranger is available only to specialists, people who are professionally engaged in the study of hand positions.
How do you know if a person is lying? Recognition of non-verbal gestures that signal deception is one of the most important communication skills that can be learned in the process of observing human behavior.
So, what gestures can betray a person if he is lying?
These are gestures associated with touching hands to the face.
When we watch or hear others tell lies or lie ourselves, we make an effort to cover our mouth, eyes, or ears with our hands. We have already said that children quite frankly use gestures that indicate deception. If a small child is lying, he will cover his mouth with his hand in an attempt to stop the lying words coming out of his mouth. If he does not want to listen to the parents' lectures, he simply plugs his ears with his fingers or covers his ears with his hands. If he sees something he would not like to see, he covers his eyes with his hands. When a person grows up, his gestures, using hands near his face, become more refined and less noticeable, but they still take place. If this gesture is used by a person at the time of speech, this indicates that he is telling a lie. However, if he growls his mouth with his hand at the moment when you speak, and he listens, this means that he senses that you are lying!
One of the most depressing pictures for a speaker is the view of the audience, where every one of them holds their hands to their mouths during a hundred speeches. In a small audience or one-on-one communication, it would be wise to pause your message and address the audience with the question, “Would anyone like to comment on what I said?” This will allow the audience to voice their objections, and you will be given the opportunity to clarify your statements and answer questions.
when a person lies, covers up a lie, or gives false testimony. These gestures can also indicate doubt, uncertainty, lies or exaggeration of a real fact.
When a person makes a hand-to-face gesture, this does not always mean that he is lying. However, this may be the first sign of deception, and further observation of the person's behavior and gestures may confirm your suspicions. This gesture should be considered in conjunction with other gestures.
Dr. Desmond Morris was experimenting with nurses who were instructed in a role-playing game to lie to patients about their condition. Those sisters who had to lie were more likely to use hand-to-face gestures than those who told the truth to their patients. This chapter discusses various hand-to-face gestures and the conditions under which they occur.
Mouth Protection
Protecting the mouth with the hand is one of the few gestures of an adult and has the same meaning as a child's gesture. The hand covers the mouth and the thumb is pressed to the cheek, while the brain at the subconscious level sends signals to hold back the spoken words. Sometimes it may be only a few fingers at the mouth or even a fist, but the meaning of the gesture remains the same.
The hand guard gesture should be distinguished from the evaluative gestures discussed later in this chapter.
Some people try to fake a cough to disguise this gesture. Humphrey Bogart, when he had to play the role of a gangster or a criminal, often used this device when discussing his criminal plans with other gangsters or during interrogation, in order to use non-verbal means to emphasize the lack of sincerity in his character.
Touching the Nose
In essence, touching the nose is a subtle, disguised version of the previous gesture. It can be expressed in a few light touches on the dimple under the nose, or it can be expressed in one quick, almost imperceptible touch. Some women do this gesture very carefully so as not to smudge the lipstick and damage the makeup.
One explanation for the nature of this gesture is that when bad thoughts enter the mind, the subconscious tells the hand to cover the mouth, but at the very last moment, out of a desire to disguise this gesture, the hand is pulled away from the mouth, and a light touch to the nose is obtained.
Another explanation could be that during a lie there are ticklish urges on the nerve endings of the nose, and one really wants to scratch the nose to get rid of them. I am often asked: “What if a person just often itches his nose?” If the nose itches, then the person will intentionally scratch or scratch it, which is different from lightly touching the nose with a hand in a situation of deception. Like touching the mouth, touching the nose can be used both by the speaker to disguise his own deceit and by the listener who doubts the sincerity of the speaker's words.
Rubbing the Age
The wise monkey says, "I see no sin," closing his eyes. This gesture is caused by the desire in the brain to hide from the deceit, suspicion, or lies it faces, or the desire to avoid looking into the eyes of the person it is telling a lie. Men usually rub their eyelids in a very vigorous manner, and if the lie is very serious, they turn their eyes away, usually to the floor. Women very delicately do this movement, swiping a finger under the eye. This can be due to two reasons: due to their upbringing, they are not familiar with rude gestures; caution movements due to the presence of makeup on the eyelids. Averting their eyes to the side, they look at the ceiling.
There is a well-known expression "To lie through your teeth." This expression refers to a complex of gestures consisting of clenched teeth and a forced smile, rubbing the eyelid with a finger and looking away. Movie actors use this complex gesture to portray the insincerity of their characters, but in real life this gesture is rare.
Ear scratching and rubbing
In fact, this gesture is caused by the desire of the listener to isolate himself from words by placing his hand near or above the ear. This gesture is an adult modification of the gesture of a small child when he plugs his ears so as not to listen to the reproaches of his parents. Other options for touching the ear are rubbing the pinna, drilling into the ear (with the tip of a finger), pulling on the earlobe, or bending the ear in an attempt to cover the ear opening. This last gesture indicates that the person has heard enough and wants, perhaps, to speak out.
Neck scratching
In this case, a person scratches the place under the earlobe or the side of the neck with the index finger of the right hand. Our observations of this gesture revealed an interesting point: a person usually makes five scratching movements. Very rarely, the number of scratches will be less than five or more than five. This gesture speaks of the doubt and uncertainty of a person who says: "I'm not sure that I agree with you." It is especially noticeable if it is contrary to verbal language, for example, if a person says something like: "I perfectly understand how you feel."
Pull Back Collar
In a study of people's gestures accompanying their lies, Desmond Morris noticed that lying causes an itchy sensation in the delicate muscle tissues of the face and neck, and scratching is required to soothe these sensations. This seems to be an acceptable explanation for why some people pull back their collar when they lie and suspect that their deception has been discovered. It also looks like the liar has sweat on his neck when he feels that you have suspected a hoax. This gesture is also used when a person is angry or upset, while he pulls the collar from the neck to cool it with fresh air. When you see a person making this gesture, you can ask him, "Could you repeat that, sir?" or “Could you clarify this point, sir?” And this will make the deceiver refuse to continue his cunning game.
fingers in mouth
Morris gives this explanation for this gesture: a person puts his fingers in his mouth in a state of great oppression. It is man's unconscious attempt to return to that safe, unclouded time in infancy, when the child suckled its mother's breast. A small child sucks his finger, and as for an adult, in addition to his finger, he puts into his mouth such objects as cigarettes, pipes, pens, and the like. While the gestures associated with covering the mouth with the hand indicate deceit, the fingers in the mouth indicate an internal need for approval and support. Therefore, when this gesture appears, it is necessary to support the person or assure him with guarantees (Fig. 57).
Interpretation of Gestures and Interpretation Mistakes
It takes a certain amount of time and a certain level of observational skills in order to develop the ability, under certain circumstances, to correctly interpret the gestures associated with the approach of hands to the face. We can conclude with all certainty that if such a gesture flashed through a person, then this means that something unpleasant is on his mind. The only question is, what is it? It can be doubt, deceit, uncertainty, some exaggeration of a real fact, a gloomy foreboding or an outright lie. The art of correct interpretation is to determine which of the listed negative emotions is present. This is best done by analyzing the gestures that precede the hand-to-face gesture, taking into account the context of the communication.
For example, my friend, with whom we often play chess, often rubs his ear or touches his nose when he is not sure of the correctness of his next move. Recently, I have noticed other gestures of his that I can interpret and use to my advantage. I found that as soon as I intend to move a piece by touching it, he immediately makes a series of gestures that give information about how he regards my proposed move. If he leans back and makes a spike gesture (confidence), I can assume that he anticipated such a move and may have already thought about how to respond to it. If, at the moment when I touch the chess piece, he covers his mouth with his hand and rubs his nose or ear; this means that he did not expect such a move and does not know how to proceed further. It is clear that the more often I walk after his "hand-to-face" gestures, the more chances I have to win.
Recently, I was interviewing a young man who wanted to get a job in our company. Throughout the interview, he sat with his arms crossed over his chest and crossed his legs, his gestures spoke of a critical attitude, his palms were too rarely visible, and his gaze only 1/3 of the time met my eyes. Something was clearly bothering him, but at that point in the interview I had too little information to make an accurate assessment of his negative gestures. I asked him about previous positions and places of work. When he answered, his responses were accompanied by rubbing his eyelid and touching his nose, and he continued to avoid my eyes. This went on throughout the interview, and I ultimately made the decision not to hire this person based on my "sixth sense". The thought of negative gestures haunted me, and I decided to test its characteristics. I found that he was giving me wrong information about his past. If I hadn't paid attention to his non-verbal cues, I might have made the mistake of hiring this person.
A videotape of a role-play based on a job interview was played in a management seminar. During this interview, the candidate for the position unexpectedly covered his mouth with his hand and rubbed his nose as he was asked one of the questions. Up until this point in the interview, he had been sitting in an open position with his jacket unbuttoned, palms bare, and leaning forward while answering questions, so at first we thought that those gestures did not coincide with his general line of behavior. The gesture of covering his mouth lasted a few seconds before he answered, and then he returned to his open posture. At the end of the role play, we asked him about this gesture, and he said that when he was asked that question, he could give two answers, one positive, one negative. As he pondered the negative answer and what impression it might make, the gesture of "covering his mouth with his hand" involuntarily came up. When he thought of a positive answer, the hand dropped and he returned to his previous open posture. His musings on how the audience would react to a negative response prompted an unexpected "eats - covering one's mouth with one's hand.
These examples show how easy it is to misinterpret hand-to-face gestures and come to wrong conclusions. And only by constant training in Observation and study of these gestures, taking into account the context in which the gestures are made, can one learn to make correct interpretations of people's thoughts.
Palm Support Cheeks and Chin
A good lecturer is one who instinctively senses when his audience is interested in what he is saying and when they have lost interest. A good sales agent feels when he "touches the right chords", i.e. finds out whether the buyer is interested in his product or not. Every salesman knows the unpleasant feeling that arises if his potential buyer is present at the presentation of the goods, without saying a word, and only watches. Fortunately, his reaction can be judged by a number of gestures, among which may be propping up his cheek or chin with his palm.
When the listener begins to put his hand in order to lean his head on it, this is a sure sign that he has become bored, and he props his head up with his hand in order to stay awake.
The degree of boredom correlates with the severity of using the hand as a support. Extreme boredom and lack of interest are seen when the head is completely on the hand (Fig. 58), and the absolute signal of boredom will be if the person lies with his head on the table and snores!
The tapping of fingers on the table and the constant stomping of feet on the floor are often misinterpreted as signs of boredom in the audience, but they are in fact indicative of impatience.
If you, as a lecturer, notice these signals, you need to make a strategic move to distract the impatient person and engage him in the lecture so that he does not infect others present. If the entire audience shows signs of boredom and impatience, this tells the lecturer that it is time for him to end his speech. It is important to note in this connection that the speed of tapping fingers or stamping feet depends on the degree of impatience of the person. The faster the gestures, the more impatient the listener becomes.
Estimated Relationships
A person assumes an evaluative posture if he props up his cheek with his fingers clenched into a fist, and the index finger rests on the temple (Fig. 59). If a person loses interest, but politely wants to appear interested, their posture will change slightly so that the head rests on the base of the palm, as shown in Figure 58. I have attended numerous management meetings where I have seen young rising managers use this gesture. in order to feign interest out of respect for the president of the company, who at that moment was making a boring message.However, unfortunately for them, any propping up of the head with the hand means boredom and betrays them, and the president may understand that they are insincere in nature or just want to flatter him.
Real interest is shown when the hand, being under the cheek, does not serve as a support for the head. An easy way to rekindle their interest, maybe if the president says something like, "I'm glad you're taking my words so seriously, because I'll be asking you questions in a second!" This will help increase the interest of the listeners in his speech, because they are afraid that they will not be able to answer his questions.
When the index finger is pointed vertically to the temple and the thumb supports the chin, this indicates that the listener is negative or critical of the speaker or the subject of his message. Often, the index finger may rub or pull on the eyelid as the negative thoughts thicken. The longer a person retains these gestures, the longer his critical attitude will last. This gesture is a signal that the speaker needs to do something urgently, either to try to captivate the listener with the content of his message, or to round off his speech. An easy way is to give him something to support and thereby change his posture. The gesture of critical evaluation is often confused with a signal of interest, but with a critical attitude, there will definitely be a chin propped up with the thumb (Fig. 60).
Chin Stroking
The next time you have the opportunity to pitch an idea to a group of people, pay close attention to their reactions as you do so, and you'll pick up a lot of fun. Most, if not all, of your group will bring one hand up to their face and begin to make appraising gestures. When you come to the end of your presentation and ask the members of the group to give their opinion or suggestion regarding your idea, the appraisal gestures will disappear. Your listeners will move one hand to the chin and begin to stroke the chin.
This "chin stroke" gesture means that the person is trying to make a decision. When you asked the audience for their opinion, their gestures changed from evaluative to “decision-making” gestures. The following signals will tell you whether their decision will be positive or negative. The sales agent would be unreasonable if he interrupts the buyer at the moment when he
will begin to stroke his chin in response to a request to communicate his decision to purchase. His best course of action would be to carefully observe the subsequent gestures of the buyer, which will tell him what decision he came to. If, for example, after this gesture, he crosses his arms over his chest and crosses his legs, then leans back in his chair, the salesman received a non-verbal negative response. You should immediately go over the merits of the proposed product again before the buyer verbally expressed his negative answer, and this can save negotiations.
If the chin stroking is followed by a gesture of readiness (Fig. 97), the seller will only have to specify how the payment for the goods will be made, and the buyer will complete the purchase.
Decision Gesture Options
If a person wears glasses, then following the evaluation gestures to make a decision, he will do the following: he will take off his glasses and put one of the glasses in his mouth, instead of stroking his chin. The smoker will place the pipe in his mouth. If a person, after being asked to communicate his decision, puts a pen or finger in his mouth; this is a sign that he is not confident in himself, and he needs support, because the object in his mouth allows him not to pronounce the decision, to think longer. Since it is considered bad manners to speak with a full mouth, an object in the mouth is considered an excuse for a person not daring to make a hasty decision.
Combination of Various Hand-to-Face Gestures
Sometimes gestures for boredom, critical attitude, and decision making can be used all at the same time, each reflecting some aspect of the person's attitude.
Figure 63 shows how the evaluative gesture is shifted to the chin, while the hand can stroke the chin at this time. When the listener begins to lose interest in the speaker, the head begins to lean towards the hand for support. Figure 64 shows a critical appraisal expressed by propping up the head with the thumb, as the listener has lost interest in the topic of conversation.
Rubbing the Back of the Head and Slapping the Forehead
An exaggerated version of the gesture, expressed by pulling back the collar, is rubbing the back of the neck with the palm of your hand, what Calero called the “neck ache” gesture. If a person makes this gesture while uttering a lie, he averts his eyes and looks at the floor. This gesture is also a sign of frustration or anger, but in this case, the hand first claps on the neck, and then begins to rub it.
Let's suppose that you asked your subordinate to carry out your assignment, and that he forgot to do it by the required time. When you ask him about the results of the assignment, he will non-verbally answer that he forgot to do it, slapping himself on the forehead or on the neck, as if figuratively beating, punishing himself for forgetfulness. Although a slap on the head usually indicates forgetfulness, the person also expresses their feelings towards you or the situation with this gesture, depending on whether
where the slap falls - on the forehead or on the neck. If he slaps his forehead (Fig. 66), he signals that he is not afraid that he showed his forgetfulness in front of you. But when he pats his neck (fig. 65), he informs you in such a non-verbal way that he is terribly unpleasant that you pointed out this mistake to him. People who have a habit of rubbing the back of their neck tend to be negative or critical of others, while those who habitually slap their foreheads in non-verbal acknowledgment of their mistake tend to be more open-minded people.
1) Covering the mouth
The hand covers the mouth, as if the brain is subconsciously trying to suppress the utterance of false words. Sometimes a person covers his mouth with only a few fingers, sometimes with a clenched fist, but the meaning of the gesture does not change from this.
Covering your mouth
Some try to justify this gesture with an imitation of a cough. Actors playing gangsters or criminals often use this gesture in scenes of discussion of criminal acts or police interrogations. The audience immediately understands that their characters are hiding something or simply deceiving.
If your interlocutor uses such a gesture, you can be sure that he is deceiving you. If the interlocutor covers his mouth at the moment when you speak, then it seems to him that you are deceiving him. This is the most unpleasant gesture that a person who speaks in public can see. When you notice it, you need to stop and ask: “Does anyone want to ask a question?” or say, “I see that some people disagree with me. Ask questions, please." This will allow the audience to openly express their doubts, and the speaker - to clarify certain points of his speech and answer questions. The same should be done when noticing that the listeners begin to cross their arms.
If your parents or caregivers often used such a gesture in your childhood, then most likely it will firmly enter your “lexicon” of body movements.
Sometimes people cover their mouth with one finger, as if calling for silence. Most likely, the parents of such a person often used this gesture when he was small. As an adult, he uses it in an attempt to hide his true feelings. Such a gesture immediately makes it clear that the interlocutor is hiding something.
2. Touching the nose
Sometimes a person touches the tip of the nose with a light, almost imperceptible movement, sometimes vigorously rubs the space between the upper lip and nose. Women make this move more inconspicuously than men, probably for fear of ruining their makeup.
It is very important to remember that such a gesture should only be interpreted in relation and in context. It is possible that your interlocutor just has a runny nose.
Scientists have found that when a person lies, their body produces substances called catecholamines that act on the nasal mucosa. With the help of special equipment, scientists were able to control the blood flow in the body and came to the conclusion that deliberate lies also lead to an increase in blood pressure. That is why people blush. Also related to this is the Pinocchio effect. High blood pressure affects the nose and the nerve endings located in it. The nose begins to itch, and the person involuntarily rubs it.
It is impossible to notice an increase in the nose with the naked eye, but touching the nose is very difficult to hide. The same thing happens when a person is anxious, offended or angry.
American scientists - neuropathologist Alan Hirsch and psychiatrist Charles Wolf conducted a thorough analysis of Bill Clinton's speech before the Grand Jury during the analysis of his relationship with Monica Lewinsky. Scientists have found that when the president spoke the truth, he barely touched his nose. When Clinton lied, he frowned for a moment before answering and touched his nose every four minutes. Hirsch and Wolfe counted 26 touches. When Clinton answered honestly, he didn't touch his nose at all.
Studies conducted with special equipment have shown that when a man lies, his penis fills with blood and enlarges. Maybe the Grand Jury should have taken Clinton's pants off?
"I did not have sexual relations with this woman"
3. Scratching your nose
Itching in the nose usually resolves with vigorous scratching or rubbing. In this way, such a gesture differs from touching the nose, which we have just talked about. As in the case of covering the mouth, the nose can be touched by both the speaker, who is trying to hide the deceit, and the listener, who doubts what he has heard. Scratching the nose is usually an isolated repetitive gesture.
4. Eye rubbing
“I don’t see anything,” says one of the wise monkeys. When a child does not want to look at something, he closes his eyes with one or both hands. When an adult does not want to see something unpleasant, he begins to rub his eyes. Such a gesture indicates an attempt by the brain to block deception, doubt, or an unpleasant sight.
Men usually rub their eyes vigorously, as if deceit is a speck in their eye. Women rub their eyes much less frequently. Instead, they touch the lower eyelid with a slight movement, which is not surprising, since they do not want to spoil the makeup. At the same time, women also look to the side.
"I just can't see it!"
"Lies through teeth" is a fairly common expression. Under it is meant a whole chain of gestures: clenching of teeth, a fake smile and rubbing of eyes. Such a chain is often used in films to portray insincerity. It is also quite common, for example, in England, since the British almost never tell the interlocutor about their thoughts.
5. Rubbing the earlobe
"I don't want to hear it!"
Imagine that you say to a person: "This product costs only three hundred pounds", and he starts rubbing his earlobe, looking away, but at the same time says: "Sounds tempting." Human gestures betray a symbolic attempt to "hear nothing." He tries to block out what he hears by putting his hand to his ear and rubbing his earlobe. There is an adult version of a child's gesture: when a child does not want to hear adults' reproaches, he closes his ears with both hands. Some people begin to rub their neck behind the ear, pick at the ear, stretch the earlobe, or twist the ear so that the shell closes the ear canal.
Rubbing the ear shows that the person has heard enough or wants to say something himself. This gesture, like touching the nose, is used by people who experience feelings of anxiety. Prince Charles often rubs his ear and touches his nose when he enters a crowded hall or walks past a crowd. These gestures betray his anxiety. But we have never seen pictures of such gestures when Prince Charles is inside his car, that is, in relative safety.
In Italy, rubbing an ear means that a man is homosexual or simply looks too feminine.
6. Neck scratching
Manifestation of uncertainty
The index finger (usually of the hand with which the person writes) scratches the neck under the earlobe. Our observations show that the average person scratches their neck five times. Very rarely the number of scratches is less than five. Only a few scratch their necks more than five times. This gesture betrays doubt or uncertainty. It's as if the person is telling you, "I'm not sure I can agree." This gesture is especially noticeable when the person's words contradict him. If a person says: “I can understand how you feel,” but at the same time scratches his neck, then he has no idea how you feel right now.
7. Collar pull
Desmond Morris was the first to discover that lying causes tingling in the tissues of the face and neck, so a person begins to scratch and rub them. Now it becomes clear why insecure people constantly scratch their necks. When speaking untruths and fearing being caught in a lie, some pull back their collars as if they are hot. The deception leads to high blood pressure and increased sweating, especially in cases where the deceiver is afraid of being caught.
The same gesture appears when a person is angry or depressed. He unconsciously pulls back his collar to cool off a bit. If you see that the interlocutor pulls back the collar, ask him to repeat or clarify what was said. This will make the deceiver think about his actions and, perhaps, tell the truth.
8. Fingers in the mouth
It is man's unconscious attempt to return to the state of safety he remembers from infancy when he suckled his mother's breast. Such a gesture occurs when a person feels under pressure. A small child replaces the mother's breast with a thumb or a blanket. An adult sucks a finger, a cigarette, a pipe, a pen, a pair of glasses, or chews gum.
Most mouth touches are associated with deceit and lies. However, a finger in the mouth indicates that a person has an internal need for encouragement. Support the interlocutor, give him certain guarantees - and this will allow you to move in a positive direction.
These people need encouragement
Grade and pull gestures
A good speaker is one who “instinctively” feels the interest of the audience, and also knows how to finish the speech on time. A good seller feels when he succeeds in touching the buyer, and knows how to identify his true interests. Anyone who has ever given a presentation knows the unpleasant feeling when clients say almost nothing and just watch the process. Fortunately, there are many gestures that can be used to determine the relationship of the interlocutor to what was said and evaluate the progress made.Boredom
When the listener props his head with his hand, it means that he is insanely bored. The hand helps to keep the head upright and not fall asleep. Pay attention to the force with which the cheek rests on the hand supporting it. At first, the head rests on the fingers, and as interest decreases, on the whole palm or on the fist. The complete lack of interest is illustrated in the figure. This posture may also be accompanied by slight snoring.
If the person’s hand does not serve as a support for him, but he simply puts it on his cheek, then this gesture means that the person is evaluating you with interest. If the result is a negative assessment, then such a gesture can easily turn into a gesture of boredom.
Many gestures are not fixed by consciousness, but they fully convey the mood and thoughts of a person. If there is a desire to become an attentive and interesting interlocutor, then it makes sense to understand gestures and facial expressions, to study the signals given by means of non-verbal communication.
So if:
- fingers clasped. Three options are possible: crossed fingers raised at face level, lie on the table, lie on your knees. This gesture denotes disappointment and the desire of the interlocutor to hide his negative attitude;
- mouth protection by hand(it can only be a few fingers or a fist). This gesture indicates that the listener feels that you are lying;
- ear scratching and rubbing. This gesture indicates that the person has heard enough and wants to speak out;
- neck scratching. Such a gesture testifies to the doubt and uncertainty of a person;
- pull back collar. This gesture is used when a person is angry or upset. It can also be used when a person lied and suspected that his deception had been discovered;
- fingers in mouth. This gesture speaks of an internal need for approval and support;
- cheek support. The gesture indicates that the interlocutor has become bored;
- the index finger is directed vertically to the temple, and the thumb supports the chin. The gesture indicates that the interlocutor is negative or critical of what he hears;
Companion rubs his forehead, temples, chin, covers his face with his hands- this indicates that he is not in the mood to talk to anyone at the moment;
Human averts eyes- this is the most striking indicator that he is hiding something;
- arms crossed on chest the interlocutor signal that it is better to end the conversation or move on to another topic. If the interlocutor crossed his arms and clenched his palms into a fist, then this means that he is extremely hostile. You need to end the conversation as soon as possible. If the interlocutor wraps his arms around his shoulders when crossing his arms, this means that he is already ready to go hand-to-hand;
- gesture "pinching the bridge of the nose", the “thinker” posture, when they prop their cheeks with their hands - these are gestures of reflection and evaluation;
- scratching with the index finger of the right hand of the place under the earlobe or side of the neck, rubbing the nose with the index finger are gestures of doubt, which indicate that something is not clear to the interlocutor in the conversation;
An offended person most often takes the following pose. He raises his shoulders and lowers his head. If the interlocutor took just such a pose, then the topic of conversation should be changed;
A person trying to end a conversation lowers the eyelids. If your interlocutor wears glasses, he will take off his glasses and put them aside;
If your interlocutor bites the temples of glasses or constantly taking off and putting on glasses, which means that he is delaying the time to make a decision. In this case, you need to help your interlocutor and give him the time he needs to think;
If your interlocutor walks around the room, this means that he is interested in the conversation, but he needs to think before making a decision;
Gestures and character
A man smug and arrogant folds his hands together.
A self-confident person who wants to show his superiority over others can be recognized by the gestures of "laying hands behind the back with a grip on the wrist" and "laying hands behind the head." It is difficult to communicate with such a person. Therefore, if they want to win him over, they lean forward a little with outstretched palms and ask him to explain something. Another way is to copy the gesture.
If the interlocutor suddenly began to collect lint from his clothes, and at the same time turned away from the speaker or looked at the floor, this means that he does not agree with what was said or does not want to express his opinion.
A person who, during a conversation, holds his hands on the side edges of a chair or his hands are on his knees wants to end the conversation. In this case, the conversation is immediately terminated.
By the way the listener releases cigarette smoke, one can determine his attitude to the interlocutor and to the conversation. If he constantly blows smoke upwards, it means that he is in a positive mood and enjoys the conversation. If the smoke is directed downward, then the person, on the contrary, is negatively inclined, and the faster he releases the smoke, the more the conversation is unpleasant for him.
Gait is also an important determining factor in the momentary state of a person. If a person has his hands in his pockets or he swings them, if he looks under his feet, he is in a depressed state. A man whose hands are clasped behind his back and his head is lowered is preoccupied with something.
Lowered shoulders and a raised head mean that a person is set for success, in control of the situation. Head tilted to one side - the interlocutor is interested. Rubbing the century - the interlocutor is telling a lie. Raised shoulders mean that the interlocutor is tense and feels the danger coming from you. Raised shoulders and lowered head are a sign of isolation. The interlocutor is either insecure, or afraid of something, or dissatisfied with the conversation, or feels humiliated.
In order to achieve the desired goal in a conversation, it is not enough to be an attentive person, you yourself need to use gestures of openness during a conversation that will help win over the interlocutor, call him to a frank conversation and leave the most favorable impression about yourself. The gestures of openness include the “open hands” gesture, when they extend their hands to the interlocutor with their palms up, and the “unbuttoning the jacket” gesture.
Watch your facial expressions: lips should not be tightly compressed, while there should be a half-smile on your face (drooped corners of your mouth are unacceptable - this means that you are upset about something, and no one needs such an interlocutor). When you look at the interlocutor, then visually try to draw a triangle on his face, in which you need to look. It helps you concentrate
Fingers, if possible, always keep together. While eating, dancing, smoking, the little finger is not put to the side, it will look cutesy-mannered. It is also indecent to point a finger.
When talking with someone, look into the eyes of the interlocutor. Educated people know how to control their gaze, facial expressions, giving the face a natural expression.
There are situations when during a conversation there is an irresistible desire to sneeze. You can resist this: just rub the bridge of your nose.
Handshake and character traits
An authoritative handshake promotes submission. It can actually make it impossible to establish equal relations. Such a handshake is characteristic of people who seek to lead, subordinate. At the same time, the palm is directed downward, in connection with which the partner is simply forced to turn the palm up. It is recommended to respond to an authoritative handshake like this:
make a wrist girth from above, and then shake it. This will allow for some time to unsettle a person who intends to command.
shake a person's hand with both hands. Such a handshake is possible between politicians as it symbolizes trust. This gesture, however, should not be used when meeting, because it can cause rejection in a stranger.
An indifferent handshake is a slight touch of the hands. Such a lifeless touch leaves the feeling that a person who is characterized by such a gesture has a weak will.
A strong handshake is one that can cause pain. It is usually preferred by serious people, whose main character trait is the desire for conquest.
A limiting handshake, that is, a handshake that is not bent at the elbow, helps to maintain a certain distance between people, leaves the personal zone inviolable. This type of handshake is characteristic of people who are aggressive or seeking to protect themselves from other people's pressure. If, during a limiting handshake, only fingers are put into the palm, then this indicates that the person does not feel confident in himself.
A pulling handshake, in which one of the partners pulls the hand of the other, may mean that this person is so insecure that he just needs to be only in the personal zone.
I.N. Kuznetsov
