How not to be afraid of anything: recommendations of a psychologist. How to overcome fear

1. Admit you're scared

The first thing to do is to realize that you are scared. This will help move thoughts from panic to more rational: “Yes, I'm scared. I'm scared. I'm afraid".

2. Start breathing deeply

When we are scared, we often forget to breathe and by restricting the flow of oxygen to the brain, we put the body in a stressful state, which in turn increases the feeling of fear. Conversely, deep breathing puts the nervous system into calm mode.

3. Realize that your brain is just playing with you.

Fear is a feeling that may have a rational external cause (you encountered a lion in the savannah) or not at all (panic attack).

Regardless of whether it is the first or the second, you must understand that everything happens in your head. And moreover, regardless of whether it is the first or the second, it will be much more useful for you to calm down and stop being afraid now in order to cope with this real or fake danger.

So, it's in your head. It's just your brain sending you signals and making you afraid. You can control yourself. Start to calm down.

4. Ask yourself questions

Of course, you think that “start to calm down” is stupid advice. Would you calm down without any advice if you could?

Not stupid, trust me. You have to start taking control of yourself. In order to cope with this in a stressful situation, ask yourself the following questions:

“Is the threat that scares me so real?”, “Am I really in danger?”, “Is it really bad if my worst fears are confirmed?”, “Is it all true or does it all seem to me?”.

And again: “What should I do to prevent a bad outcome from this situation?” By looking for answers to these questions, you take your mind off the fear itself and help you find a solution.

5. Gradually overcome your fears

If you are afraid of dogs, this does not mean that you need to go and get yourself a fatter bull terrier. But nevertheless, you need to gradually acquaint yourself with the object of your fears. Try to walk past the dog and not speed up your pace. Try petting a small, friendly dog.

Slowly, slowly, but still increase the amount of fear in your life, and you will gradually realize that it is not scary at all and you are no longer as afraid of it as before. If your fears prevent you from living, do not ignore them, but try to make friends with them.

6. Don't multiply your fears

Point 5 is important not to ignore, because, according to scientists from the University of Pennsylvania, fears tend to multiply, intensify and, which is especially unpleasant, spread to other areas of life. That is, if you were afraid of one thing, but did not fight it, it is possible that over time you will begin to be afraid of something else.

That is why it is very important to do what your dad told you to do when you were five - to overcome your even the smallest and not particularly disturbing fear.

7. Don't focus on the negative

People who have fears that prevent them from living often tend to see only the bad in any life situation. Like Eeyore from their favorite cartoon, it is very difficult for them to find something positive in life and concentrate on it (instead of suffering from the negative).

If you have noticed this in yourself, well done. This is the first step towards a life without fear. In any, even the most frightening and unpleasant situation, as an exercise, find two positive outcomes.

Did your car break down? Excellent. Walk a little, stay in the sun. In general, when thinking about any situation that worries you, start with the word “excellent”.

8. Recognize that you are not afraid now.

Another feature of fears and the people who live with them is the inability to see and remember situations in which they were not really scared at all. Every day, stop several times, stop doing what you are doing, and admit to yourself that now, at this particular moment, you are not afraid of anything at all and that everything is fine with you.

And there are many more such moments in your life than moments filled with fears, no matter what you think about yourself.

A person who associates with people who excel in a certain area will become successful. True, not everyone succeeds, and the reason is the fear of people. It is not surprising that many are interested in how to stop being afraid of people.

Such individuals know that the lack of communication is fraught with an independent search for answers to various questions. Yes, and big mistakes can not be avoided. It is easier to move in the chosen direction, guided by the experience of others. Moreover, the proven advice of people who have managed to achieve a lot in life contribute to the rapid achievement of important goals.

Let's explore this topic in detail. I offer proven tips and tricks with which to get rid of fear.

  1. Treat people as acquaintances and friends. Most often, a person is afraid of another, because he does not know him. If you introduce a stranger as a friend, it will be easier to communicate. You are not afraid to communicate with relatives and close friends?
  2. If you find the path to success and take action, get rid of the fear of people and you will easily communicate with them.
  3. There is no such thing as fear. People are not afraid of others, but afraid of being rejected and misunderstood. Realize this and stock up on confidence.
  4. Fear is the reason why people rarely decide to get acquainted. Although, they do not understand that inaction and fear of mistakes become the cause of defeat.
  5. How to overcome fear? Take care of what triggers it. Write down on a piece of paper what causes trembling in the knees, then act.
  6. Face your fears face to face. Let's say it's scary to talk. Gather your courage and chat with the first passer-by. You will see that in a few minutes the fear will evaporate.
  7. After that, a smile will appear on your face, because you realize that you were afraid of your own illusions all the time.
  8. Fine weapons - a favorite pastime. Doing what you love, you will have to communicate with other people.

If the above methods are not suitable, pay attention to sports. Physical activity helps to forget fears, improve health and self-esteem. Get a strategic life goal and move towards it. The goal should be more important than the fears. Otherwise, you will not have to count on success.

How to stop being afraid of people on the street

Some experience discomfort, panic and intense fear during communication. According to experts, this is not a whim and not a feature of a person. This disease, because of which a person is afraid to look stupid and funny in the eyes of others. Phobia must be eradicated, as it is the cause of the lack of a full life.

Consider how to stop fighting people on the street. I hope that thanks to the recommendations you will solve the problems and return to a normal lifestyle.

  1. Retire and think about what brings you into such a state. Track poorly charged thoughts to get to the root of the problem and eradicate it quickly.
  2. Work on your communication skills. This does not mean that you need to change yourself, and do not immediately run in search of an interlocutor. Register in the chat or on the site, chat with other users on the Internet.
  3. Don't forget self-esteem. To strengthen it, get to work and do it well. If the first time ends in failure, do not stop, anyone can make a mistake.
  4. According to professional psychologists, provoking an anxiety state helps to get rid of fear of people. Experience the psyche in a variety of life situations.
  5. If you have the opportunity to express your own point of view, be sure to do so. It doesn't matter how true it is.

The reason for the fear of people lies in the person himself. If you work on yourself, everything will work out and you will notice the result in the near future. You will be able to freely walk the streets of the city, look into the eyes of passers-by and not be afraid.

Video tips

If you can’t cope on your own at home, contact a psychologist. The doctor will suggest a proven technique.

How to stop being afraid of people at work

Everyone tends to be afraid of something, and fear haunts throughout life. Some are afraid of heights, others are afraid of pain, and others are afraid of dismissal or strict bosses. The list of phobias is extensive. And if some of them protect from troubles, others prevent a full life.

Let's take a closer look at the concept of fear. According to experts, fear is a process of a slight slowdown in the nervous and physical activity of a person, which appeared during evolution. This is a kind of defense reaction of the body, a response to a real or imagined danger. People show up differently. If some freeze in place, others fall out of reality.

Most often, people fall victim to social fear - a close relative of biological. Biological fear is a kind of self-preservation instinct, while the essence of social fear comes down to fear of people with a higher status.

What causes feelings of intimidation and fear at work? The list of factors is extensive and is represented by the fear of the team and management, the likely reduction, competition, rivalry, criticism, failure and the loss of a stable future.

It's time to learn how to stop being afraid of people at work.

  1. Admit that you are afraid of something. According to psychologists, conscious fear is half the battle.
  2. On a piece of paper, write down everything that makes you nervous and brings discomfort.
  3. Do not disregard your own merits, which will help raise self-esteem. A good memory, knowledge of several foreign languages ​​or computer technology will destroy petty fears.
  4. Treat problems with humor. If you are very afraid of the leader, imagine that he is dancing naked in the middle of the field in a circle of cartoon animals. Agree, this image is not scary. The main thing is not to overdo it when creating.

Be sure to set yourself up for success. If there is a desire, you will find a solution to the problem. It is enough to show a little patience and your career will go uphill.

How to stop being afraid of people and start living

Fear is inherent in all people, but individuals who do not pay attention to it achieve great success, while others have to suffer. If you worry about this and attach great importance to fears, they will only intensify and you will not be able to win.

For some wise and educated individuals, fear is a collection of new obstacles and opportunities, overcoming which, they become stronger.

Psychologists have carefully studied this issue and, with the help of experiments, have created techniques that help to stop being afraid and start living.

  1. The reasons. Many people want to get rid of fear. However, they do not even know what they are afraid of. Therefore, a list of causes for concern will have to be drawn up. Having completed the process, you will understand that you are not afraid of everything. One fear protects against accidents, and the other needs emergency elimination. Some fears cannot be eliminated. In this case, curb them and take control.
  2. spiritual peace . Stop being afraid with the help of spiritual peace. Anxiety is when a person thinks about something and experiences a feeling of anxiety. Peace of mind will save you from a hectic life. Read books, go to church, set goals, exercise.
  3. Everyone has opportunities for spiritual development. The main thing is desire, time and certain knowledge.
  4. First of all, you need to learn how to pray. The church or theological school will help in this matter. Remember, spiritual peace is the result of self-examination. During the process, a person gets to know himself, learns a lot of new things and understands how to become better.
  5. Working on fear . To stop being afraid, you have to constantly work. It is not necessary to eliminate all fears, otherwise you will not be able to accumulate experience. Examine each fear in detail. Having dealt with the issue, draw up a step-by-step plan of action. Thanks to the plan, you will be able to act confidently and according to plan.
  6. Face to face with fear . If you face fear face to face, you will become a successful and happy person, you will realize that for many years a mere trifle made your knees tremble. According to experts, it will be possible to overcome fear in one day if you do what you are afraid of several times. The source of experience is the human mind. Take action to get rid of it.
  7. Favourite buisness . Scientists say that a hobby is a formidable weapon in the fight against personal problems. Take, for example, pike fishing. If you do not find the destination, depression and emptiness will appear. If you find a path in life, you will become fearless, standing on the way to a successful goal.

And I have fears that I actively fight at home and the recommendations listed are the result of the work done.

All about social phobia

On this note, I end the story. You have learned how to stop being afraid of people on the street and at work. In this regard, people on the planet are equal, everyone is afraid of something.

If you have declared war on fears, understand that fear is a natural emotion and a kind of defense. Summons anything: rats, bandits, height, darkness, cookies. In some cases, a person guesses that a certain object or process represents a hidden danger.

This feeling arises subconsciously, protects against risk and forces you to think about the consequences of a decision. Life without fear will be very different. Good luck and happy life!

Internal fears sometimes do not allow a person to develop and move on. But without courage, you will never achieve success and your goals. How to stop being afraid and start moving towards your dream?

Often a person is afraid of something. This may be the fear of the dark, airplanes, girls, the public, illness, work and life in general. Fear signals us about danger, but what if it prevents us from acting and paralyzes our whole life?

How to stop being afraid

Comfort zone

From childhood, a person was taught that life is dangerous. Parents took care of him for a long time, and he almost never faced the difficulties of real life. When a person grows up, he begins to fear and be afraid of everything. Man tries to protect himself from everything. He fearfully sits in his comfort zone and is not going to leave it.

What to do and how to stop being afraid? The most interesting and promising is outside the comfort zone. There are interesting acquaintances, travel, work, success, the opposite sex and a new life. It is impossible to achieve something different by doing the old things. It's time to make an attempt to see what is beyond the horizon and study it.

Fear of mistakes

People think that making a mistake is shameful and their self-respect will suffer. Failure is not defeat, as some people think. Mistake is normal. Only those who do nothing do not commit them.

How to stop being afraid? Stop protecting yourself and your self-esteem. A person is not a crystal vase, and one cannot run away from abrasions and bumps. It's like riding a bike. At first, you will fall many times until you learn to ride.

How success works

Sometimes people have no idea how life and success work. People who succeed immediately on one try are rare. Many successful people have failed several times. Big failures did not stop them, but taught them how to deal with problems and look for solutions.

How to stop being afraid? Luck loves the brave and stubborn, not the cowardly and giving up after a couple of attempts. Go ahead, don't expect a miracle. Create opportunities and seize them. Try again and again. Time runs very fast, and you will not have a second life.

Shyness in front of people and fear of communication is a common problem. Most often, introverted people and teenagers face it. It is for them that it is extremely important what impression they make on others and whether others like them.

What is shyness? In psychology, this is the state of a person and the behavior caused by it, the main features of which are uncertainty, indecision, awkwardness, stiffness in movements and manifestations of one's own personality.

Different psychological schools explain the root causes of shyness in their own way and, accordingly, offer different solutions to the problem. Each person decides for himself which of them is closer to his personality, character and life experience.

  1. Differential psychology. According to this theory, shyness is innate and inherited. Confidence cannot be learned. A rather pessimistic view of the problem, because an innate property of a person cannot be changed.
  2. Behaviorism. According to the theory of behaviorism, any human behavior is a reaction to incoming stimuli, which under certain circumstances and the strength of emotional involvement becomes part of the personality. So it is with shyness - people could not master the feeling of fear on the stimuli of the social environment, which ultimately led to pathological insecurity in communicating with people.
  3. Psychoanalysis. Psychoanalysts explain shyness by the presence of an unconscious conflict in the personality structure. In their opinion, this is the reaction of the unconscious to unsatisfied instinctive needs and the conflict between moral norms, reality and instincts.
  4. Individual psychology. The followers of this trend actively explored shyness and the “inferiority complex” closely related to it, which appears in childhood, when the child begins to compare himself with his peers, often encounters his own imperfections and begins to be embarrassed by his appearance, his abilities, family, etc. If a child does not have enough self-confidence, he becomes fearful, withdrawn, passive. However, it is in this direction of psychology that special attention is paid to the possibilities of self-development of the individual, i.e. shyness is not a predetermined problem, which means that it is possible to get rid of it through work on oneself.
  5. The theory of "high reactivity". According to her, the tendency to be shy is the body's reaction to overload. In this case, the consequences of this reaction can be two options:
    • the child seeks to “avoid”, does not like to communicate and get acquainted, becomes insecure and fearful in public;
    • the child enters the struggle, is overly self-confident.

Shyness can be based on two causes: natural and social. Natural means character, temperament, type of nervous system. Under the social - the influence of education, the environment, communication within the family.

Why is shyness dangerous?

Shyness and fear of people have common roots.

  • the second is more related to personality pathologies and manifests itself in experiencing a feeling of fear in the presence of strangers and in the process of communication;
  • the first - it is considered a common occurrence and does not cause anxiety among parents if their child is inclined to be shy in the company and avoid strangers, is afraid to get acquainted. An adult considers this quality a trait of character and the specifics of temperament, with which nothing needs to be done, but one has only to come to terms with.

Pathological fear of people is managed with medication or through sessions with a psychologist, and shyness is most often ignored. However, this is not entirely true.

In the context of life, shyness and inability to communicate can sometimes bring a person a lot of problems and missed opportunities, if you do not start working with it.

Shyness in most cases leads to:

  • narrowing the circle of contacts. It is difficult for a shy person to get acquainted independently, to communicate freely. Usually, such people are limited to interaction in the family circle. At the same time, most often they suffer because of this - because they really need diverse communication;
  • shyness affects the objectivity of the perception of the situation. When a problem or a stressful situation arises - a shy person often becomes illogical, forgetful;
  • a shy person can rarely speak openly and defend his opinion;
  • shyness is the cause of depression and reduced emotional background, shy people tend to feel dissatisfied;
  • the poor emotional and social life of a person who tends to be shy leads to physical weakness and fatigue, muscle cramps, and stoop.

Based on the consequences of shyness listed above, it becomes obvious that it must be combated.

Shyness leads not only to negative feelings of fear and insecurity, but also reduces social adaptation, significantly affects the mental and physical level of personality development.


What to do?

Psychologists have developed exercises, performing which a person will understand how to stop being afraid of people, reduce the overall level of anxiety and the tendency to be shy in relationships with people and overcome their shyness.

  1. In any communication situation, when you start to be afraid of others, remember that shyness is an ordinary feeling that has no objective reasons. It arises on the basis of a chain of thoughts that follows the feeling - I will be funny, I look ugly, I will not be able to talk decently, I am afraid to answer, etc. And all this is happening in your mind, although in reality everything may look exactly the opposite. Always keep this in mind when you start to feel shy or afraid of people.
  2. Act in spite of the emerging feeling of shyness. Try to meet new people more and talk openly about your feelings.

Each time, acting overcoming your fears, you put a new positive experience into the “piggy bank” of your consciousness, on which your courage and confidence in relationships with people will subsequently be built.

  1. Learn to speak and respond thinking only about your goal of communication, discarding all other thoughts. Forget all "what if". Keep in mind only your goal and the options for achieving it.
  2. When communicating with people, avoid excessive politeness and a large number of introductory phrases. Build a conversation clearly and do not "mumble". Learn to speak a little, but to the point.
  3. In moments of particular anxiety and fear, use breathing techniques. In yoga, they are actively used and help to manage their condition and minimize embarrassment.

How to remove shyness from your life

In addition to certain exercises that reduce situational shyness, allow you to manage your condition and not be shy in communication, psychologists have identified rules for attitudes towards life, oneself and other people. Building your lifestyle according to them, the question of how to stop being afraid of people will be closed:

  1. Understand (by yourself or with the help of a psychologist) the reasons for your shyness. Where did it come from? Why should you be shy and afraid, and what benefits do you have from this? Record your insights and refer back to them periodically.
  2. Live with the understanding that people are primarily concerned with themselves, and there are no spotlights on you.
  3. Know your strengths and weaknesses. Do not forget that there are no ideal people, they are not divided into “good” and “bad” and you are not alone with your problem.
  4. Always find reasons to praise and thank yourself. You need to do this regularly.
  5. Strive to communicate more, get acquainted with new opinions, be interested in and study others, less “digging” into your own experiences. The tendency to reflection is an important quality, but in moderation. Excessive introspection drives you in circles, moving you away from reality and interaction with others. Strive to do, not dream.
  6. Exercise regularly. Movement is the basis of life. Sport allows you to release the accumulated negative energy of fear and anxiety.
  7. Always be prepared to be rejected or not appreciated. Understand why this scares you and what is the worst thing that can happen? You should learn to accept the word "no", do not strive to please everyone.
  8. Give yourself permission to make mistakes. Perfectionism will be a bad helper for you. Remember, learning something without mistakes is impossible.

Only those who do nothing do not make mistakes.

  1. Don't waste the opportunity to practice your social skills and communicate more. Learn from the experience of those who, in your opinion, have overcome their shyness. Go periodically to trainings in communication skills or public speaking, where you can learn not to be shy and openly talk about your feelings and desires.
  2. Find comfortable societies for yourself. Don't do it like everyone else - just because most people in your environment like to have fun in clubs and chat at parties - this does not mean that you should do it too.
  3. Always watch what you say and how. Notice people's reactions. Forget and get distracted from your fear. In moments of anxiety - repeat: "I am not afraid of people, they will not do anything bad to me, I should not please everyone."

Final comments

Shyness reduces our life potential and deprives us of many opportunities. This personality trait has long been recognized as a problem in psychology and is being actively researched. The ability to communicate is the key to success in social life.

Based on most psychological theories, shyness is not a congenital defect and not a disease.

You can deal with it on your own if you work on yourself regularly. By doing certain exercises when you need to communicate with other people, it is possible to cope with shyness here and now, and by making the above rules the basis of life, you can enjoy communication and forget about the problem of shyness.