By ignoring, we are trying to protect ourselves from the invasion of our lives, our personal space, thoughts. And this is understandable. If there is no way to eliminate the source of irritation, you can simply try not to notice it. But when we are ignored, we suffer. It seems that any, even the most disgusting, outcome of the situation would be better than this agonizing pause, during which you feel as if you are standing over a cliff, unable to either jump or climb back.

Ignoring can be conscious or unconscious. The unconscious is a way of psychological protection from unpleasant, aggravating factors and circumstances. Conscious ignoring is, rather, a moral punishment.

One of the common situations: “I won’t pick up the phone - let him suffer.” And why torture if you can pick up the phone and answer that you don’t intend to communicate now, you’re not in the mood, or there’s simply nothing to talk about? The punishment of your inattention is cruel. Because a person who has survived several fruitless attempts to reach out, in the end, can feel like an empty place, artificially lower his self-esteem and become depressed. This applies not only to romantic, but to any human relationship.

There is a notion of appropriate disregard. For example, if you came home and someone from your family answered you sharply or sarcastically. The answer to the remark can start a verbal skirmish and, as a result, a quarrel. And ignoring unpleasant words will help save nerves for yourself and others. Think about it: everyone had a hard day, everyone was tired and, perhaps, had not had time to relieve the accumulated stress on the way home, so you get a piece of it. Know how to ignore the negative, include an internal filter on it. Of course, we are talking only about minor and isolated differences. If rudeness is a regular way of communicating with someone close, do not allow yourself to talk like that and be sure to find out and resolve the situation.

It is also worth doing in the case of grandmothers, who begin to vote half a stop about what, for example, an indecently short skirt, which did not exist in “their time”. In such situations, ignoring is not a punishment (the punishment for you would be to continue listening to the nasty grandmother), but a reasonable decision so as not to stir up interest in your person and not add fuel to the fire. Seeing a deadpan expression on her face, the attacking grandmother will soon lose interest and switch her attention.

It is possible and sometimes even necessary to use ignore if certain situations and people violate the boundaries of our comfort zone. But it doesn't pay to be ignored. It’s better to talk to a person once and dot all the “and” so that he stops paying special attention. In general, ignorance should be used very carefully, because, as the saying goes, “in a spoon is medicine, in a cup is poison.”

Instruction

Remember backstory. If you've known your loved one long enough human oh, and a relationship has already begun between you, perhaps in this way he or she shows you his offense. Think about whether you are a partner? In this case, you better not succumb to his maneuvers. Don't step over yourself and don't do what you don't want to. If you give in once, this situation can be repeated.

Think maybe your favorite human by ignoring you is trying to turn on psychological protection. Of course, this is not the best tactic to deal with difficulties, but it has its place. Thus avoiding you human seeks to prevent discussion of the topic that concerns him at the moment. Since the conversation can be painful, it's best not to start it yet. Over time, your partner will find a way out or be ripe for a conversation.

Consider this option: perhaps before a loved one human began to ignore you, you demanded something impossible from him. It may be difficult for your partner to admit their helplessness and powerlessness in this matter. Try to moderate your requirements and requests.

Try to forget human but if he takes you at the very beginning of the relationship. This can only mean one thing: he is not interested in you and does not need you. Not all people are able to tell the truth in person. Perhaps he prefers to hide and avoid you, rather than speak frankly, honestly and openly. Face it: your relationship is hopeless.

Run from someone who periodically shows you signs of attention, meets with you, and then ignores you for days and weeks. It's obvious you're being held in reserve. Surely such human and there is one or more partners. Either he is by nature so loving, or hedged. In any case, consider whether you need such an unreliable, cynical human nearby, which can betray you at any moment.

In most cases, people are interested in the question of how to attract the attention of an ignorant human. But sometimes they are forced to think about the ability to ignore someone who is intrusive and arrogant. By the way, the question is not at all idle, because sometimes neither polite refusals, nor direct conversations, nor rude attempts to cut off communication help. If you have come to the conclusion that only the lack of attention to a certain person will allow you to break off conflict relations with her, you need to act.

You will need

• Most methods of ignoring an unpleasant person come down to establishing a distance - social, psychological, emotional or geographical. Let's consider these options.

Instruction

Start by creating an emotional distance. Before taking any action, try to distract yourself, calm down. Learn to perceive an obsessive adviser or boyfriend in cold blood. This is the most difficult, but the most necessary type of distance. It helps especially well in situations where you are forced to with a person quite often. For example, if it is in whose apartment you live, an annoying classmate or an unbalanced colleague. Learn to perceive his "attacks" as if from the outside. Imagine that you are the director of a movie where your offender is the main character. If he starts to provoke and piss you off, think about what angle it would be good to film the situation from, so that the emotions of the offender, offended, observers, etc. can be seen.

Try to establish a psychological distance. The essence of psychological distance is the ability to share understanding and acceptance. You can understand the strange desires of a colleague, but not accept them as acceptable for yourself. You are able to sympathize with the advice of the elderly, but you should not take them as instructions for action. And you will need time and patience to learn how to convey to human your position. So say: “I respect your point of view for this and that reason, but I will do it my own way, because I think that this is the right thing for me personally.”

Use social pressure to influence the offender. Social distancing should be resorted to if the first two options cannot be implemented. For example, if a spouse is a rowdy dangerous to society and, one has to use the pressure of society and the influence of official authorities to protect oneself from his actions. A softer version of building a social distance is a change in social circle. Change the social circle to one that your abuser does not have access to. If you originally belong to different layers, make access to your circle impossible for him. A social circle is a kind of community into which it is difficult for outsiders to enter. This is not always good, but in your situation, society can close the doors to the wrong human, making it easier for you to end a failed relationship with him.

If all the measures above do not help, set the geographical distance. This is a radical method of solving the problem and should be resorted to as a last resort. For example, if she was a victim of the home, sometimes it is possible to snatch her from her tyrant husband only by creating a geographical distance. The victim must literally disappear for a while, changing both addresses and phones, so that her persecutor calms down and stops pursuing her. Physical distance with the offender is not needed. Often six months are enough for the passions to subside and you can return to your usual way of life.

The situation in which a guy suddenly stops paying attention to a girl, does not answer calls and avoids meetings, is different from circumstances when a stranger simply does not notice you. In both cases, a special approach is required.

If the subject of your interest does not notice you, being in the same company with you, then there may be two options - he either really does you, and he does it consciously, or does not want to show his emotions. Perhaps he is too concerned about his image and considers you unworthy in order to make him a couple - it is not difficult to be a narcissistic proud man. He values ​​his status above all else, strives to always emphasize his individuality and frankly despises people he does not understand. Such an "instance" should be left alone with itself and not prevent him from enjoying the contemplation of his own "virtues".

Don't try to change your loved one. Adults have an established system of values, attitudes and interests, so it is very difficult to change them. If you constantly impose your opinion on a man, he may not be able to stand it and leave.

It is easy enough to learn to ignore people who cause only negative emotions. Hurry, however, is not worth it. Think about whether you will regret your decision, because there may not be a chance to take back the words. Reflect on the purpose of ignoring, be honest with yourself. Maybe you just want to get the attention of certain people?

If you become the object of ridicule, try to react differently to them. Hold back embarrassment or anger, act as if the remark was not about you. There is another way: to calmly agree with all his barbs. In any case, do not show that you are offended. The abuser will probably stop and you won't have to ignore him.

Keep in mind: you only need to ignore when you want to completely free yourself from unpleasant people, as if you had never met.

What to do if annoying acquaintances require attention?

So, you've carefully weighed everything and still believe that ignoring is your option. If the people with whom you do not want to communicate know you superficially, then

• as little as possible look into their eyes when you look - do not smile.
• keep your distance from these people, passing by - do not linger.
• do other things. If you read a book or listen to music while wearing headphones, there is less chance that you will be disturbed than your face will be bored, and your eyes will look from one side to the other.
• take the necessary action on social media.

If you are uncomfortable with one of the employees, limit yourself to discussing business matters.

It may also happen that you want to ignore old friends. In this case, we advise you to speak confidentially. Maybe they got into a difficult situation? It is likely that you will understand each other, and the relationship will become the same.

Unfortunately, this is not always the case. Once in the center of a real conflict, which has the only way out - ignoring, directly tell your former friends about it.

Remember: you must be direct, but polite. Do not be ironic, be serious so that your words are not mistaken for a mockery or a childish whim.

No need to wait for your former friends to immediately agree with you, and you will part amicably. Surely you will need a lot of patience to completely eliminate these people from your life. Don't answer their calls or messages. Do they write hurtful things to you? Don't give in. Otherwise, you will not get rid of tension, but increase it. If this does not work, say that you will complain to the appropriate authorities. Let people who are unpleasant to you understand that you are determined.

Try to discuss the situation only with loved ones. By attracting strangers, you risk becoming the center of an entire epic. Answer questions concisely, and gradually they will disappear.

Ignoring people is an extreme measure. Let it be expressed not only by words, but also by actions, therefore:

• Avoid potential meeting places (such as a bus stop where you've seen each other often or your favorite coffee shop). If you do encounter, limit yourself to a nod of your head. Stop, ask "How are you?" will be redundant. We also do not recommend turning off if you have already been seen. Be calm and respectful.
• ask mutual friends not to invite you to the same events (except for a big celebration like a graduation or a wedding, when you don't have to talk to every one of the three hundred people).
• think about what else unites you, and protect yourself from unnecessary communication as much as possible.

Keep in mind that it is equally important to expel people unpleasant to you from your own head. It's not easy if they used to play a significant role in your life. In order not to be distracted by memories, load yourself with things, but not with a routine, but with something interesting. Buy a collection of poems that you have long wanted to read, try to cook a new dish, go to the zoo. New impressions will not keep you waiting long!

It has been observed that clearing the mind, sometimes surprisingly, transforms an unpleasant situation or eliminates a person from your life, or relationships are improved, in a natural way.

Ignorance and unrequited love.

The sphere of personal relationships is special. Unfortunately, ignoring a person who aroused considerable hopes (and, as it turned out, in vain) is more difficult than deleting him from the number of VKontakte friends. Therefore, the techniques listed below can only partially work. Time will help with the rest.

• Don't blame yourself for falling in love with the "wrong" person.
• tune in to distance: reduce the number of meetings, calls, messages. When going to the theater, cinema or for a holiday, offer company to other people.
• do not run away from new acquaintances. Just remember to be sincere! It is not worth entering into a relationship specifically so that the past disappears from your head, or dating “in spite of” an unsuccessful past is not worth it. Concentrate only on whether you are interested in a new person or not.

The situation is easier if the object of your feelings is from unfamiliar people with whom you have never spoken and only said hello twice. Avoid possible meetings and as soon as you notice that you are mentally returning to him, distract yourself (see the last paragraph of the 3rd paragraph).

How to learn to ignore a person if the opposite situation has developed (you yourself have become the object of experiences)?

• do not accept gifts, whatever their value.
• Communicate actively with other members of the opposite sex. You can just pretend, the main thing is that a person unpleasant to you sees it. His confidence will immediately decrease.
• be persistent in rejection. A person must understand that your dry answers are not at all coquetry and not a sign of a bad mood.

What if they ignore you?

Suddenly you realized that a friend or loved one is gradually disappearing from your life. Maybe you yourself gave him a reason - forgot about the promise, caused jealousy, did not congratulate him on an important event? Admit your fault and try to correct the mistake. In the latter case, buy a gift and a card. Of course, congratulations are good on time, but belated attention is better than nothing. One way or another, you must show that you are sincerely sorry and friendship with this person is very important to you.

If you're sure you've done nothing wrong, talk to him. Be careful with reproaches and other negativity, because this will only increase the problem. The person who cares about you will not miss the chance to bring you back into his life.

There are other ways to ignore a person, but remember that solving a problem is always preferable to avoiding it.

Good luck!

Ignoring someone can be quite difficult, especially if you constantly run into this person on your way if they try to talk to you or don't quite understand what's going on. But if you really need to ignore this person, then try to look very busy with your business, change your usual way of life and cut off all contact with this person. Check out the following tips on how to ignore someone.

Steps

Use body language

1. Don't look this person in the eye. Not making eye contact is the best way to ignore people. Once your eyes meet, it will show that you are aware of the existence of this person, and your efforts to ignore him will be in vain. If this person is in close proximity to you, avoid making eye contact at all costs. Look at everyone except him, look in front of you or just at the floor.

   • If a person is shorter than you, then just look over his head. If it is higher, then do not look up.
   • If he is the same height as you and is standing nearby, try to portray an absent, indifferent look in case you accidentally meet his eyes.

2. Pass by quickly. Another way to ignore a person is to walk as fast as possible. This will show that you are a busy person, you have time to do a lot of things, and that you have no desire to stop and talk to this person. Walk with your head held high and look like you're in a hurry, even if you're not.

   • If you see this person approaching you from afar, step back a little so you don't accidentally bump into him.
   • Do not turn to the side to get around your enemy. If you cross or turn on the other side of the road, it will show that you care. However, if you see him in the distance and are sure that he does not see you, then it is better indeed to turn off your path and out of sight.

3. Depict some kind of "closedness". If you happen to be near this person, fold your arms across your chest, cross your legs if you're sitting, hunch over a bit, and generally do everything to appear completely out of reach. Your body should say for itself: "Don't talk to me, buddy," and most likely your enemy will understand this hint.

   • Don't smile. Let your face be serious, even a little sullen, to show that you do not want to talk to anyone.
   • You can also draw a face with a blank and meaningless expression that will scare away anyone who tries to talk to you.
   • If you have long hair, bangs, or are wearing a hat, try to cover part of your face so you don't have to look the person in the eye.

4. Try to look like you are very busy. You can look either closed off from everything around you, or very, very busy, so much so that you simply cannot spare a second of your time for idle chatter with this person.

   • If you are currently with friends, then turn to face them and start something animatedly discussing and gesticulating. This will show that you are too busy to talk or look in anyone's direction.
   • If you are alone, immerse yourself in a book, magazine, or textbook. You can even quietly read aloud, as if you were memorizing something.
   • Always keep a lot of different items in your hands. When you walk or sit, hold your phone, textbooks, or a huge indoor flower in a pot in your hands. Seeing how busy you are, this person will not start a conversation with you.

   Use technology

   1. Use your phone. This will help you ignore any person. There are several ways to use the phone for this purpose. First, you can stare at the phone to look busy as soon as you see your enemy. You can talk to someone on the phone, laugh wildly, or dive headlong into correspondence with someone with whom you would like to communicate at the moment.

      • Change your phone number so this person can't call or text you.
      • Block him in your contacts so you don't receive messages from him.
      • Set your phone to ring for a time when you're near that person so you can pick up the phone and pretend you're talking to someone.

   2. Listen to music. Buy headphones and always wear them when you're alone, even if you're not listening to music. When you see your enemy, turn up the music to the fullest and shake your head to the beat to look completely absorbed and busy with your own business and not wanting to spend a single minute of your time talking.

      • If you really want to annoy, you can also close your eyes and sing along to the music so that the person does not have the slightest chance of talking to you.

   3. Ignore online. Ignoring online is much easier than ignoring a person in real life because you don't have to avoid meeting them. In this case, you just need to ignore emails, Facebook posts, Twitter notes, and any other messages on the network.

      • Block this person on your social networks. Make sure he can't contact you online.
      • Change your email address and virtual nicknames if necessary. Your enemy should not have a single way to get in touch with you on the network.

   Change your habits

   1. Take a different route. If you want to ignore someone and not meet them every time you go, the easiest thing to do is just change the route you normally take. If you always meet your enemy on the way in between classes, then take a different, longer path to the next lesson so as not to see this person. If you constantly meet him at work, then go down another hallway and use another restroom to keep contact to a minimum.

      • If you meet him wherever you go, then start driving.
      • If your enemy also changed his route in order to catch your eye again, then keep changing your route until he gets tired of this stupid game.

   2. Avoid places where your enemy likes to visit. It's elementary. If you know his favorite bars, restaurants and parks, just don't go there anymore. It's not worth it, however, if you're willing to spend enough time there and continuously ignore the person, you can try.

      • You can also remember the days when he usually goes there. If he visits his favorite restaurant on the weekends, and you really want to go there, then try to visit there during the week.
      • If he only goes to his restaurant during discount hours, then you can visit there a little later in the evening.

   3. Go to places where your enemy will never go. For example, if he prefers meat dishes, then look for restaurants in your area that serve vegetarian dishes. If he hates jazz, then go to a jazz concert in your area. If he is at enmity with one of your friends, then at this friend’s party you are unlikely to meet your enemy and be able to have a good time.

      • Visiting places and institutions where this person does not go will help you not only ignore him, but will also open up new and unexplored horizons for you.

   Ignore anyone in any situation

   1. Ignore anyone at school. It might not be easy, especially if you're in the same class, but you can still find a way. Here's how to do it:

      • If you are seated at the same desk as this person, move to another desk. If everyone has their own place in the class, then ask the teacher to transplant you.
      • If you see him at the school canteen, then sit at another table.
      • If you meet him in the hallway of the school, then just look straight ahead, as if you were in such a hurry to the next lesson that you did not notice how you passed this person.
      • If he asks you a question in class, turn your head away as if nothing happened.

   2. Ignore someone at work. This can be quite tricky as you may be sitting next to your enemy or even working on the same project. Anyway, there are several ways to minimize contact.

      • Do not enter the office kitchen or break room while this person is there. Remember when he usually has lunch in the kitchen or pours himself coffee, and try to eat lunch and rest at other times if possible.
      • If you are sitting next to your enemy in the office, then try to focus on working on the computer, and also always have a pile of work papers on hand so that you can immerse yourself in them instead of looking in his direction.
      • This should not affect your professional activities. If you need to discuss something with this person on business matters, discuss it. He will be even more frustrated if you talk to him at work and completely ignore him outside the workspace.

   3. Ignore someone socially. It's easy enough if you know what to do. You need to rely on your friends and try to stay as far away from this person as possible, even if you are in the same room. Here's what you can do:

      • Surround yourself with friends. Talk to them and laugh like you've never heard anything funnier in your life.
      • Dance. If your enemy approaches you and music is playing, immediately grab your friend and go dancing. If he does approach you on the dance floor, close your eyes as if enjoying the music.
      • If he is in the same circle of friends as you, then immerse yourself in an active conversation with one of your friends. When he starts talking, start scratching your ear or staring at the phone, in a word, act like nothing is happening.
   • Listen to your MP3 player to disengage from the person who is bothering you.
   • If your enemy tries to talk to you, then take out the phone and pretend that you are answering the call.
   • Make sure you have good reasons to ignore the person. (For example, if he wants to ask for forgiveness, then he can be given a chance).
   • If you know that you can meet this person in a certain place (for example, in a store), then check if his car is in the parking lot at the store before entering there.
   • While at work, keep your door closed or pretend to be on the phone.
   • Learn to see people out of the corner of your eye. Then you can pretend not to see them.
   • It is still necessary to talk with your enemy if the reason for your ignoring is completely solvable.
   • If the person you're angry with is sincerely remorseful, then it's probably best for you to forgive him or have a serious talk before cutting off all contact with him. Give him/her a chance - it's most likely just a misunderstanding.
   • If the person you are trying to ignore calls you by name or otherwise gets your attention, then there is an easy way out of this situation. Try to look very busy, say absentmindedly "Hello" and keep walking as if you have urgent business.
   • If you don't like this person, then doing all this is even easier.

   Warnings

   • Ignoring a person who sincerely wants to talk to you brings a lot of pain and suffering to a person. Before you start ignoring someone, make sure he/she really deserves it.

It hurts to be ignored. It's not easy to figure out how to respond to this, especially if you don't know if it's on purpose or unintentional. It is worth taking into account whether this person ignores you on a regular basis and what kind of communication style he has. Understanding the reasons why you might be overlooked will help you respond in a smart and forward-thinking way.

Steps

Ask why you were boycotted

Ask yourself why the person ignoring you is doing this. Perhaps he is ignoring you on purpose, or perhaps unintentionally. Think back to the last time you talked to him. Was he angry with you or hostile towards you? Did you say something hurtful to him? If yes, most likely, he still has not "cooled down" after what happened. On the other hand, if you had a great time last time, there is probably some external circumstance that caused the person to inadvertently ignore you. Perhaps he is busy preparing for an exam or has fallen in love with someone.

Ask a third party why you are being ignored. If you're being ignored by a friend or colleague, ask a mutual friend or colleague if they know what's up. He may be able to identify or explain to you why that person is avoiding you. Maybe you pissed him off without even realizing it, and he, instead of directly stating it, decided to simply ignore you so as not to aggravate the conflict. It is likely that a third party will be able to analyze the situation more objectively and help you figure out why you are being left out.

Directly ask the person who is ignoring you why they are doing it. Talk openly with the person who is avoiding you. Ask him to talk in private. In a quiet, private place, calmly ask, “Listen, I keep thinking, why are you ignoring me?” Provide evidence: for example, he did not return your calls or emails, or did not respond when you contacted him. Listen carefully to his explanations.

Know how manipulators behave. If a person is ignoring you the first time, there is probably a good reason for it. However, if your friend or colleague is constantly ignoring you or other people, they may be taking some pleasure in what they are doing. He may alternately use silence to obtain an apology or concession for certain demands. Finally, he may ignore you so that you lose faith in yourself. From the manipulator you can hear: "If you really knew and loved me, you would not ask why I ignore you." All of the above examples point to a narcissistic personality that needs to be identified and not to be indulged.

back off

1. Judge the person who ignores you by their actions. Suppose you had an open conversation with him and he said he understood what you were getting at. He may even have apologized for his behavior. However, after that, he again began to avoid you. In this case, you should understand that he was insincere, and is not really interested in maintaining a good relationship with you.

   Accept the person's decision to cut off contact with you. Don't continue to pressure him into asking for forgiveness for your behavior, or calling out to him explaining how his actions have affected you (if you already have). Someone who constantly shows indifference towards you is likely to enjoy it. Don't play his games trying to fix the problem over and over again.

   Don't blame yourself for his behavior. If someone consistently ignores you, even after you've tried to make up with them, that's their choice. Don't worry about what you might say or do differently in order for the person to be considerate of you or your point of view.

   Don't burn bridges. Let the friend or family member who is ignoring you know that you are hoping for reconciliation. Don't put an end to your relationship with this person. Some people have personal problems that make it difficult to maintain a healthy relationship. Let him know that you are there if he ever wants to talk to you or if he needs help.

Resolve conflict with the person who is ignoring you

Look at the problem as a difference in communication styles. Suppose your friend or partner isn't ignoring you out of malice. Perhaps he does this simply to avoid aggravating and spreading the conflict. He probably needs some personal space, and he wants to give you both time to cool down a little after the conflict. When you figure out that your partner sees this silence differently, then later you will be more likely to make peace and avoid aggravating the conflict.

Accept your feelings. When someone you care about ignores you, it hurts. You probably feel frustrated, angry, and sad about being shunned. If you have these feelings, don't pretend it's not. Accepting your feelings is the first step to speaking up and letting the other person know that they are being cruel.

Have a structured conversation. Structured conversations are held at specific times for a specific purpose and come with a specific set of rules that prohibit things like yelling and name calling. In a structured conversation, both sides are ready to openly discuss the issue before them and have already rehearsed their main arguments. Offering a structured conversation can be helpful if someone is ignoring you because of a long-standing issue or set of issues that are preventing you from forging a deeper emotional connection.

Step outside your comfort zone. Try a different communication style. If you are a short-tempered person who constantly raises his voice, gets angry and turns on half a turn, try to better control your feelings in the midst of emotions. If you are a calm person who ignores others, withdraws when conflict arises, and tries to speak out or explain his point of view only after he has considered the answer for a few minutes, then bring more spontaneity and emotion into your behavior when resolving conflicts (but do not get carried away by shouting and cursing).

1. If someone is ignoring you and you don't know why, talk to them and try to fix the problem.
2. Often people ignore others when they need time and space to deal with personal problems. Don't take it personally and respect the individual's right to privacy.
3. Firstly, respect yourself, and secondly, do not approach first, let him come up and talk to you. Your top priority at this time should be respect for yourself.