Valentin Berestov

There was a time when birds couldn't sing.

And suddenly they learned that in one distant country there lives an old, wise man who teaches music.

Then the birds sent the Stork and the Nightingale to him to check whether this was so.

The stork was in a hurry. He was eager to become the world's first musician.

He was in such a hurry that he ran to the sage and did not even knock on the door, did not greet the old man, and with all his might shouted directly into his ear:

Hey old man! Come on, teach me music!

But the sage decided to teach him politeness first.

He led Stork outside the threshold, knocked on the door and said:

You have to do it like this.

All clear! - Aist was delighted.

Is this the music? - and flew away to quickly surprise the world with his art.

The nightingale came later with its little wings.

He timidly knocked on the door, said hello, apologized for the trouble and said that he really wanted to study music.

The sage liked the friendly bird. And he taught the nightingale everything he knew himself.

Since then, the modest Nightingale has become the best singer in the world.

And the eccentric Stork can only knock with his beak. Moreover, he boasts and teaches other birds:

Hey, do you hear? You have to do it like this, like this! This is real music! If you don't believe me, ask the old sage.

How to find a track

Valentin Berestov

The children went to visit their grandfather, a forester. Went and got lost.

They look, Belka is jumping over them. From tree to tree. From tree to tree.

Guys - to her:

Squirrel, Squirrel, tell me, Squirrel, Squirrel, show me How to find the path To the grandfather's lodge?

Very simple, Belka answers.

Jump from this Christmas tree to that one, from that one to a crooked birch. From the curve of the birch, a large, large oak tree is visible. The roof is visible from the top of the oak tree. This is the guardhouse. Well, what are you? Jump!

Thanks Belka! - say the guys. “But we can’t jump up trees. We'd better ask someone else.

Jumping Hare. The children sang their song to him:

Bunny Bunny, tell me, Bunny, Bunny, show How to find the path To the grandfather's lodge?

To the gatehouse? - asked the Hare. - There is nothing easier. At first it will smell like mushrooms. So? Then - hare cabbage. So? Then it will smell like a fox hole. So? Skip this smell to the right or left. So? When he is behind, sniff like this and you will smell the smoke. Jump straight to it without turning anywhere. This grandfather-forester puts a samovar.

Thank you, Bunny, the guys say. - It's a pity that our noses are not as sensitive as yours. You'll have to ask someone else.

They see a snail crawling.

Hey, Snail, tell me, Hey, Snail, show me How to find the path To the grandfather's lodge?

Tell for a long time, - Snail sighed. - Lu-u-better I'll take you there-u-u. Follow me.

Thank you Snail! - say the guys. We don't have time to crawl. We'd better ask someone else.

A bee sits on a flower.

Guys to her:

Bee, Bee, tell me, Bee, Bee, show me How to find the path To grandfather's lodge?

Well, well, - says the bee. - I'll show you... Look where I'm flying. Follow along. See my sisters. Where they are, there you are. We bring honey to grandfather's apiary. Well, goodbye! I'm in a terribly hurry. Well...

And flew away. The kids didn't even have time to thank her. They went to where the bees flew and quickly found a lodge. That was joy! And then grandfather treated them to tea with honey.

Honest caterpillar

Valentin Berestov

The caterpillar considered itself very beautiful and did not miss a single drop of dew so as not to look into it.

How good am I! - the Caterpillar rejoiced, looking with pleasure at her flat face and arching her shaggy back to see two golden stripes on it.

Too bad no one notices this.

But one day she got lucky. A girl walked through the meadow and picked flowers. The caterpillar climbed onto the most beautiful flower and waited.

That's disgusting! Even looking at you is disgusting!

Ah well! - Caterpillar got angry. - Then I give my honest caterpillar word that no one, ever, anywhere, for anything and for no reason, in any case, under no circumstances will see me again!

I gave my word - you need to keep it, even if you are a Caterpillar. And the caterpillar crawled up the tree. From trunk to branch, from branch to branch, from branch to branch, from branch to branch, from branch to leaf.

She took out a silk thread from her belly and began to wrap herself around it. She labored for a long time and finally made a cocoon.

Wow, how tired I am! sighed the Caterpillar. - Totally screwed up.

It was warm and dark in the cocoon, there was nothing else to do, and the Caterpillar fell asleep.

She woke up because her back was itching terribly. Then the Caterpillar began to rub against the walls of the cocoon. Rubbed, rubbed, rubbed them through and fell out.

But she fell somehow strange - not down, but up.

And then the Caterpillar in the same meadow saw the same girl.

"Horrible! thought the Caterpillar. - Even though I'm not beautiful, it's not my fault, but now everyone will know that I'm also a liar. I gave an honest caterpillar that no one would see me, and did not restrain him. A shame!" And the caterpillar fell into the grass.

And the girl saw her and said:

Such a beauty!

So trust people, - the Caterpillar grumbled.

Today they say one thing, tomorrow they say something completely different.

Just in case, she looked into the dewdrop. What? In front of her is an unfamiliar face with a long, long mustache.

The caterpillar tried to bend its back and saw that large multi-colored wings appeared on its back.

Ah, that's what! she guessed. - A miracle happened to me. The most ordinary miracle: I became a Butterfly!

This happens. And she spun merrily over the meadow, because she did not give an honest butterfly word that no one would see her.

Magic word

V.A. Oseeva

A little old man with a long gray beard was sitting on a bench and drawing something in the sand with an umbrella.
. “Move over,” Pavlik told him and sat down on the edge.
The old man moved aside and, looking at the red, angry face of the boy, said:
- Has something happened to you? - Well, okay! And what about you?” Pavlik squinted at him.

"I'm going to my grandmother. She's just cooking. Drive or not?
Pavlik opened the door to the kitchen. The old woman was taking hot cakes off the baking sheet.
The grandson ran up to her, turned his red wrinkled face with both hands, looked into her eyes and whispered:
- Give me a piece of pie... please.
Grandma straightened up. The magic word shone in every wrinkle, in the eyes, in the smile.
- Hot ... hot hot, my dear! - she kept saying, choosing the best, ruddy pie.
Pavlik jumped for joy and kissed her on both cheeks.
"Wizard! Wizard!" he repeated to himself, remembering the old man.
At dinner, Pavlik sat hushed and listened to his brother's every word. When the brother said that he was going to go boating, Pavlik put his hand on his shoulder and quietly asked:
- Take me, please. Everyone around the table went silent.
The brother raised his eyebrows and chuckled.
“Take it,” said the sister suddenly. - What are you worth!
- Well, why not take it? Grandma smiled. - Of course, take it.
"Please," Pavlik repeated.

The brother laughed out loud, patted the boy on the shoulder, tousled his hair:
- Oh, you traveler! Okay, get going!
“Helped! Helped again!
Pavlik jumped out from behind the table and ran out into the street. But the old man was no longer in the square.
The bench was empty, and only incomprehensible signs drawn by an umbrella remained on the sand.

Badly

V.A. Oseeva
The dog barked furiously, falling on its front paws.

Directly in front of her, nestled against the fence, sat a small disheveled kitten. He opened his mouth wide and meowed plaintively.

Two boys stood nearby and waited to see what would happen.

A woman looked out the window and hurriedly ran out onto the porch. She drove the dog away and angrily called out to the boys:

Shame on you!

What's embarrassing? We didn't do anything! the boys were surprised.

This is bad! the woman replied angrily.

What is easier

V.A. Oseeva
Three boys went into the forest. Mushrooms, berries, birds in the forest. The boys were walking.

Didn't notice how the day went by. They go home - they are afraid:

Get us home!

So they stopped on the road and think what is better: to lie or to tell the truth?

I will say, - says the first, - as if a wolf attacked me in the forest.

The father will be frightened and will not scold.

I will say, - says the second, - that I met my grandfather.

The mother will be delighted and will not scold me.

And I'll tell the truth, - says the third one. - It's always easier to tell the truth, because it's the truth and you don't need to invent anything.

Here they all went home.

As soon as the first boy told his father about the wolf - look, the forest watchman is coming.

No, he says, there are wolves in these places. Father got angry. For the first guilt he got angry, and for a lie - twice.

The second boy told about his grandfather. And grandfather is right there - he is coming to visit. Mother learned the truth. For the first guilt I got angry, and for a lie - twice.

And the third boy, as soon as he came, he confessed everything from the threshold. My aunt grumbled at him and forgave him.

Good

V.A. Oseeva

Yurik woke up in the morning. Looked out the window. The sun is shining. The money is good. And the boy wanted to do something good himself.

Here he sits and thinks: “What if my sister was drowning, and I would save her!”

And my sister is right there:

Walk with me, Yura!

Go away, don't stop thinking! The sister got offended and left.

And Yura thinks: “Now, if the wolves attacked the nanny, and I would shoot them!”

And the nanny is right there:

Put away the dishes, Yurochka.

Clean it yourself - I have no time! The nurse shook her head.

And Yura again thinks: “Now, if Trezorka fell into the well, and I would pull him out!”

Trezorka is right there. Tail wags: “Give me a drink, Yura!”

Go away! Don't stop thinking! Trezorka closed his mouth, climbed into the bushes.

And Yura went to his mother:

What would be good for me to do? Mom patted Yura on the head:

Take a walk with your sister, help the nanny clean the dishes, give some water to Trezor.

sons

V.A. Oseeva

Two women were drawing water from a well.

A third one approached them. And the old old man sat down on a pebble to rest.

This is what one woman says to another:

My son is dexterous and strong, no one can cope with him.

And the third is silent. - Why don't you tell about your son? - her neighbors ask.

What can I say? - says the woman. - There is nothing special about him.

So the women took full buckets and went. And the old man is behind them.

Women go and stop. My hands hurt, water splashes, my back hurts. Suddenly, three boys run out towards me.

One tumbles over his head, walks with a wheel - women admire him.

He sings another song, fills himself with a nightingale - his women listened.

And the third ran up to the mother, took heavy buckets from her and dragged them.

The women ask the old man:

Well? What are our sons?

Where are they? - answers the old man. - I see only one son!

blue leaves

V.A. Oseeva

Katya had two green pencils. But Lena has none. So Lena asks Katya:

Give me a green pencil.

And Katya says:

I'll ask my mom.

Both girls come to school the next day.

Lena asks:

Did mom let you?

And Katya sighed and said:

Mom allowed me, but I didn’t ask my brother.

Well, ask your brother again, - says Lena.

Katya comes the next day.

Well, did your brother let you? - asks Lena.

My brother allowed me, but I'm afraid you'll break your pencil.

I'm careful, - says Lena.

Look, says Katya, don't fix it, don't press hard, don't take it in your mouth. Don't draw too much.

I, - says Lena, - only need to draw leaves on the trees and green grass.

This is a lot, - says Katya, and she frowns her eyebrows. And she made a disgusted face. Lena looked at her and walked away. I didn't take a pencil. Katya was surprised, ran after her:

Well, what are you? Take it! - Don't, - replies Lena.

At the lesson, the teacher asks: - Why do you, Lenochka, have blue leaves on the trees?

No green pencil.

Why didn't you take it from your girlfriend?

Lena is silent.

And Katya blushed like a cancer and said:

I gave it to her, but she won't take it.

The teacher looked at both:

You have to give so that you can take.

On the rink

V.A. Oseeva

The day was sunny. Ice glittered. There were few people at the rink.

The little girl, with her arms outstretched in a comical way, rode from bench to bench.

Two schoolchildren tied up their skates and looked at Vitya.

Vitya performed various tricks - either riding on one leg, or spinning around like a top.

Well done! one of the boys called out to him.

Vitya darted around the circle like an arrow, famously turned around and ran into the girl.

The girl fell.

Vitya was scared.

I accidentally ... - he said, shaking off the snow from her fur coat.

Hurt?

The girl smiled.

Knee...

There was laughter from behind. "They're laughing at me!" thought Vitya and turned away from the girl in annoyance.

Eka unseen - the knee! What a crybaby! - he shouted, driving past schoolchildren.

Come to us! they called. Vitya approached them. Hand in hand, all three glided merrily across the ice.

And the girl was sitting on the bench, rubbing her bruised knee and crying.

A funny story about a harmful liar schoolgirl Ninochka. A story for younger schoolchildren and middle school age.

Harmful Ninka Kukushkina. Author: Irina Pivovarova

Once Katya and Manechka went out into the yard, and there Ninka Kukushkina was sitting on a bench in a brand new brown school dress, a brand new black apron and a very white collar (Ninka was a first grader, she boasted that she was studying for fives, and she herself was a loser) and Kostya Palkin in a green cowboy shirt, sandals on bare feet and a blue cap with a large visor.

Ninka enthusiastically lied to Kostya that she had met a real hare in the forest in the summer, and this hare was so delighted to Ninka that he immediately climbed into her arms and did not want to get off. Then Ninka brought him home, and the hare lived with them for a whole month, drinking milk from a saucer and guarding the house.

Kostya listened to Ninka with half an ear. Stories about hares didn't bother him. Yesterday he received a letter from his parents saying that perhaps in a year they would take him to Africa, where they now lived and built a milk canning plant, and Kostya sat and thought about what he would take with him.

"Don't forget the fishing rod," thought Kostya. Yes, more guns. Winchester. Or a double shot."

Just then Katya and Manechka came up.

- What's this! - said Katya, after listening to the end of the "hare" story. - This is nothing! Think rabbit! Hares are rubbish! A real goat has been living on our balcony for a whole year now. My name is Aglaya Sidorovna.

"Aha," said Manechka. "Aglaya Sidorovna." She came to visit us from Kozodoevsk. We have been eating goat's milk for a long time.

"Exactly," said Katya. "Such a kind goat!" She brought us so much! Ten packets of nuts in chocolate, twenty cans of condensed goat milk, thirty packs of Yubileinoye cookies, and she herself does not eat anything but cranberry jelly, soup with beans and vanilla crackers!

“I’ll buy a double-barreled shotgun,” Kostya said respectfully.

- To make the milk smell good.

- They lie! They don't have any goats! Ninka got angry. "Don't listen, Kostya!" You know them!

- Still as it is! She sleeps in the basket at night in the fresh air. And sunbathing during the day.

- Liars! Liars! If a goat lived on your balcony, it would bleat all over the yard!

- Who bleated? What for? - asked Kostya, having managed to plunge into thoughts, to take or not to take aunt's loto to Africa.

- She bleats. Soon you will hear for yourself ... And now let's play hide and seek?

"Let's go," Kostya said.

And Kostya began to drive, and Manya, Katya and Ninka ran to hide. Suddenly, a loud goat bleating was heard in the yard. It was Manechka who ran home and bleated from the balcony:

- Be-ee... Me-ee...

Ninka crawled out of the hole behind the bushes in surprise.

— Kostya! Listen!

"Well, yes, it's bleating," said Kostya. "I told you...

And Manya backed for the last time and ran to help out.

Now Ninka drove.

This time, Katya and Manechka ran home together and began to bleat from the balcony. And then they went down and, as if nothing had happened, ran to help out.

“Listen, you really have a goat! - said Kostya. - What did you hide before?

She's not real, she's not real! shouted Ninka.

- Here's another, groovy! Yes, she reads books with us, counts to ten, and even knows how to talk like a human being. Here we go and ask her, and you stand here, listen.

Katya and Manya ran home, sat down behind the balcony bars and bleated in one voice:

— Ma-a-ma! Ma-a-ma!

- Well, how? - Katya leaned out. - Do you like it?

"Just think about it," said Nina. “Mom” any fool can say. Let me read a poem.

“I’ll ask you now,” Manya said, squatted down and shouted to the whole yard:

Our Tanya is crying loudly:

Dropped a ball into the river.

Hush, Tanechka, don't cry:

The ball will not sink in the river.

The old women on the benches shook their heads in bewilderment, and Sima the janitor, who at that time was diligently sweeping the yard, became alert and raised her head.

“Well, is it great, really?” Katya said.

- Awesome! Ninka made a sly face. “But I can’t hear anything. Ask your goat to read poetry louder.

Here Manechka yells like a good obscenity. And since Manya had a voice that was just right, and when Manya tried, she could roar so that the walls shook, it is not surprising that after the rhyme about the whining Tanechka, people's heads began to protrude out of all the windows indignantly, and Matvey Semenycheva Alpha, who at this time ran in the yard, barked deafeningly.

And the janitor Sima ... There is no need to talk about her! Her relationship with the Skovorodkin children was not the best. They Sime was fed up with their antics to death.

Therefore, having heard inhuman cries from the balcony of the eighteenth apartment, Sima rushed straight into the entrance with her broom and began to beat her fists on the door of the eighteenth apartment.

And the most mischievous Ninka, pleased that she managed to teach Pan so well, after looking at the angry Sim, sweetly said as if nothing had happened:

Well done your goat! Great poetry reading! And now I'm going to read something to her.

And, dancing and sticking out her tongue, but not forgetting to adjust the blue nylon bow on her head, the cunning, mischievous Ninka squealed very disgustingly.

A short story with a lot of meaning is much easier for a child to master than a long story with several themes. Start reading with simple sketches and move on to more serious books. (Vasily Sukhomlinsky)

Ingratitude

Grandfather Andrey invited his grandson Matvey to visit. The grandfather put a large bowl of honey in front of his grandson, put white rolls, invites:
- Eat, Matveyka, honey. If you want, eat honey with rolls with a spoon, if you want - rolls with honey.
Matvey ate honey with rolls, then - rolls with honey. I ate so much that it became difficult to breathe. He wiped his sweat, sighed and asked:
- Tell me, please, grandfather, what kind of honey is it - lime or buckwheat?
- And what? - Grandfather Andrei was surprised. - I treated you with buckwheat honey, granddaughters.
“Linden honey is still tastier,” said Matvey and yawned: after a plentiful meal, he felt sleepy.
Pain squeezed the heart of grandfather Andrei. He was silent. And the grandson continued to ask:
- And the flour for rolls - from spring or winter wheat? Grandfather Andrei turned pale. His heart clenched with unbearable pain.
It became hard to breathe. He closed his eyes and groaned.

Why say "thank you"?

Two people were walking along the forest road - grandfather and a boy. It was hot, they wanted to drink.
The travelers came to a stream. Cool water gurgled softly. They leaned over and got drunk.
“Thank you, stream,” Grandpa said. The boy laughed.
- Why did you say "thank you" to the stream? he asked his grandfather. - After all, the stream is not alive, will not hear your words, will not understand your gratitude.
- This is true. If the wolf got drunk, he would not say “thank you”. And we are not wolves, we are people. Do you know why a person says "thank you"?
Think who needs this word?
The boy thought. He had plenty of time. The road was long...

Martin

The mother swallow taught the chick to fly. The chick was very small. He clumsily and helplessly waved his weak wings. Unable to stay in the air, the chick fell to the ground and was badly hurt. He lay motionless and squealed plaintively. The mother swallow was very alarmed. She circled over the chick, screaming loudly and did not know how to help him.
The little girl picked up the chick and put it in a wooden box. And she put the box with the chick on the tree.
The swallow took care of her chick. She brought him food daily, fed him.
The chick began to recover quickly and was already chirping merrily and cheerfully waving its strengthened wings.
The old red cat wanted to eat the chick. He quietly crept up, climbed a tree and was already at the very box. But at this time the swallow flew off the branch and began to fly boldly in front of the very nose of the cat. The cat rushed after her, but the swallow deftly dodged, and the cat missed and slammed to the ground with all his might.
Soon the chick completely recovered and the swallow, with a joyful chirping, took him to his native nest under the neighboring roof.

Evgeny Permyak

How Misha wanted to outsmart his mother

Misha's mother came home after work and threw up her hands:
- How did you, Mishenka, manage to break off the wheel of a bicycle?
- It, mother, broke off by itself.
- And why is your shirt torn, Mishenka?
- Mommy, she broke herself.
- And where did your second shoe go? Where did you lose it?
- He, mother, lost himself somewhere.
Then Misha's mother said:
- How bad they are! They, the scoundrels, need to teach a lesson!
- But as? Misha asked.
“Very simple,” Mom replied. - If they have learned to break themselves, tear themselves apart and get lost on their own, let them learn to repair themselves, sew themselves up, stay on their own. And you and I, Misha, will sit at home and wait until they do all this.
Misha sat down by the broken bicycle, in a torn shirt, without a shoe, and thought hard. Apparently, this boy had something to think about.

Short story "Ah!"

Nadia didn't know how to do anything. Grandmother Nadya dressed, put on shoes, washed, combed her hair.
Mom Nadya was fed from a cup, fed from a spoon, put to bed, lulled.
Nadia heard about the kindergarten. It's fun for friends to play there. They dance. They sing. They listen to stories. Good for kids in kindergarten. And Nadenka would have been fine there, but they didn't take her there. Not accepted!
Oh!
Nadia cried. Mom cried. Grandma cried.
- Why didn't you take Nadya to kindergarten?
And in kindergarten they say:
How can we accept her when she can't do anything.
Oh!
Grandma caught on, mom caught on. And Nadia caught on. Nadia began to dress herself, put on her own shoes, wash herself, eat, drink, comb her hair, and go to bed.
As they found out about this in kindergarten, they themselves came for Nadia. They came and took her to the kindergarten, dressed, shod, washed, combed.
Oh!

Nikolai Nosov

steps

One day Petya was returning from kindergarten. That day he learned to count to ten. He reached his house, and his younger sister Valya was already waiting at the gate.
“I already know how to count!” Petya boasted. - I learned in kindergarten. Look how I now count all the steps on the stairs.
They began to climb the stairs, and Petya loudly counted the steps:

- Well, why did you stop? Valya asks.
“Wait, I forgot which step is next. I will remember now.
“Well, remember,” says Valya.
They stood on the stairs, they stood. Petya says:
- No, I can't remember that. Well, let's start over.
They went down the stairs. They started going up again.
“One,” says Petya, “two, three, four, five… And he stopped again.
- Forgot again? Valya asks.
- Forgot! How is it! I just remembered and suddenly forgot! Well, let's try again.
They went down the stairs again, and Petya started over:
One, two, three, four, five...
“Maybe twenty-five?” Valya asks.
- Well no! You just stop thinking! You see, I forgot because of you! Will have to start over again.
I don't want to at first! Valya says. - What it is? Up, then down, then up, then down! My legs already hurt.
“If you don’t want to, don’t,” Petya answered. “I won’t go any further until I remember.”
Valya went home and said to her mother:
- Mom, there Petya counts steps on the stairs: one, two, three, four, five, but then he doesn’t remember.
“And then six,” Mom said.
Valya ran back to the stairs, and Petya kept counting the steps:
One, two, three, four, five...
- Six! Valya whispers. - Six! Six!
- Six! Petya was delighted and went on. - Seven eight nine ten.
It’s good that the stairs ended, otherwise he would never have reached the house, because he only learned to count up to ten.

Slide

The children built a snow hill in the yard. They poured water on her and went home. The cat didn't work. He was sitting at home, looking out the window. When the guys left, Kotka put on his skates and went up the hill. Teal skates in the snow, but can't get up. What to do? Kotka took the box of sand and sprinkled it on the hill. The guys came running. How to ride now? The guys were offended by Kotka and forced him to cover the sand with snow. Kotka untied his skates and began to cover the hill with snow, and the guys poured water over it again. Kotka also made steps.

Nina Pavlova

The little mouse got lost

The mother gave the forest mouse a wheel made of dandelion stem and said:
- Come on, play, ride near the house.
- Pip-pip-pip! the mouse shouted. - I will play, I will ride!
And rolled the wheel down the path. I rolled it, rolled it, and played so much that I did not notice how I found myself in a strange place. Last year's linden nuts were lying on the ground, and above, behind the carved leaves, a completely foreign place! The mouse is quiet. Then, so that it would not be so scary, he put his wheel on the ground, and he sat in the middle. Sitting and thinking
“Mom said: “Ride near the house.” And where is now near the house?
But then he saw that the grass trembled in one place and a frog jumped out.
- Pip-pip-pip! the mouse shouted. - Tell me, frog, where is near the house, where is my mother?
Fortunately, the frog knew just that and answered:
- Run straight and straight under these flowers. Meet the newt. He has just crawled out from under the stone, lies and breathes, is about to crawl into the pond. From the newt, turn left and run along the path all straight and straight. You will meet a white butterfly. She sits on a blade of grass and waits for someone. From the white butterfly, turn left again and then shout to your mother, she will hear.
- Thanks! - said the mouse.
He picked up his wheel and rolled it between the stems, under the bowls of white and yellow anemone flowers. But the wheel soon became stubborn: it would hit one stalk, then another, then it would get stuck, then it would fall. And the mouse did not back down, pushed him, pulled him, and finally rolled out onto the path.
Then he remembered the newt. After all, the newt never met! And he did not meet because he had already managed to crawl into the pond while the little mouse was fiddling with his wheel. So the mouse did not know where he needed to turn left.
And again he rolled his wheel at random. Rolled up to the tall grass. And again, grief: the wheel got tangled in it - and neither back nor forward!
Barely managed to get him out. And then only the mouse remembered the white butterfly. After all, she never met.
And the white butterfly sat, sat on a blade of grass and flew away. So the little mouse did not know where he needed to turn left again.
Fortunately, the mouse met a bee. She flew to the flowers of red currant.
- Pip-pip-pip! the mouse shouted. - Tell me, bee, where is near the house, where is my mother?
And the bee just knew this and answered:
- Run downhill now. You will see - in the lowland something turns yellow. It's as if the tables are covered with patterned tablecloths, and on them are yellow cups. This is a spleen, such a flower. From the spleen go uphill. You will see flowers radiant like the sun and next to them - on long legs - fluffy white balls. This is a coltsfoot flower. Turn right from him and then shout to your mother, she will hear.
- Thanks! the mouse said...
Where to run now? And it was already getting dark, and no one could be seen around! The mouse sat down under a leaf and cried. And he cried so loudly that his mother heard him and came running. How happy he was for her! And she even more: she didn’t even hope that her son was alive. And they merrily ran side by side home.

Valentina Oseeva

Button

Tanya's button came off. Tanya sewed it to her blouse for a long time.
“Well, grandmother,” she asked, “do all boys and girls know how to sew on their buttons?”
- I really don't know, Tanyusha; both boys and girls know how to tear off buttons, but grandmothers get more and more to sew on.
- That's how! Tanya said offended. - And you made me, as if you yourself were not a grandmother!

Three comrades

Vitya lost his breakfast. At the big break, all the guys had breakfast, and Vitya stood on the sidelines.
- Why do not you eat? Kolya asked him.
Lost breakfast...
- Bad, - said Kolya, biting off a large piece of white bread. - It's still a long way to lunch!
- Where did you lose it? Misha asked.
- I don't know... - Vitya said quietly and turned away.
- You probably carried it in your pocket, but you need to put it in your bag, - said Misha. But Volodya did not ask anything. He went up to Vita, broke a piece of bread and butter in half and handed it to his comrade:
- Take it, eat it!

Call Natasha on the phone!
- Natasha is not there, what can I tell her?
Give her five roubles!

The patient came to the doctor:
- Doctor, you advised me to fall asleep, count to 100,000!
- Well, how did you fall asleep?
No, it's already morning! Sent by Yana Sukhoverkhova from Estonia, Pärnu on May 18, 2003

- Vasya! Does it bother you that you're left-handed?
- Not. Every person has their own shortcomings. Here you are, for example, with which hand do you stir the tea?
- Right!
- Here you see! And normal people interfere with a spoon!

A psycho is walking down the street and dragging a thread behind him.
A passer-by asks him:
- Why are you dragging a thread behind you?
What should I push forward?

- I have a neighbor - a vampire was.
— How did you know that?
- And I drove an aspen stake into his chest, and he died.

"Boy, why are you crying so bitterly?"
- Due to rheumatism.
- What? So small, and you already have rheumatism?
- No, I got a deuce, because I wrote "rhyme" in the dictation!

— Sidorov! My patience has run out! Don't come to school tomorrow without your father!
- And the day after tomorrow?

"Petya, what are you laughing at?" Personally, I don't see anything funny!
- And you can’t see: after all, you sat on my sandwich with jam!

— Petya, how many excellent students are in your class?
“Not counting me, four.
- Are you an excellent student?
- Not. That's what I said - except for me!

Phone call in the teacher's room:
— Hello! Is this Anna Alekseevna? Tolya's mother says.
— Who-whom? I can't hear well!
- Tolya! I spell it out: Tatyana, Oleg, Leonid, Ivan, Kirill, Andrey!
- What? And all the kids are in my class?

In a drawing lesson, one student turns to a neighbor on the desk:
- You drew well! I've whetted my appetite!
— Appetite? From sunrise?
- Wow! I thought you drew an egg!

During the singing lesson, the teacher said:
Let's talk about opera today. Who knows what opera is?
Vovochka raised his hand:
- I know. This is when one person kills another in a duel, and he sings for a long time before falling!

The teacher handed out notebooks after checking the dictation.
Vovochka approaches the teacher with his notebook and asks:
“Maria Ivanovna, I didn’t understand what you wrote down here!
- I wrote: "Sidorov, write legibly!"

The teacher told the lesson about the great inventors. Then she asked the students:
- What would you like to invent?
One student said:
- I would invent such an automaton: press a button - and all the lessons are ready!
- Well, lazy! the teacher laughed.
Here Vovochka raised his hand and said:
- And I would come up with a device that would press this button!

Vovochka answers in a zoology lesson:
- The length of the crocodile from head to tail is 5 meters, and from tail to head - 7 meters ...
“Think about what you are saying,” the teacher interrupts Vovochka. - Is it possible?
“It happens,” Vovochka replies. - For example, from Monday to Wednesday - two days, and from Wednesday to Monday - five!

— Vovochka, what do you want to be when you grow up?
— An ornithologist.
Is this the one who studies birds?
- Yeah. I want to cross a dove with a parrot.
- Why?
- And if suddenly the dove gets lost so that he can ask for the way home!

The teacher asks Vovochka:
What teeth are the last to appear in a person?
“Artificial,” answered Little Johnny.

Vovochka stops the car on the street:
- Uncle, take me to school!
- I'm going in the opposite direction.
- All the better!

- Dad, - says Little Johnny, - I have to tell you that tomorrow there will be a small meeting of students, parents and teachers at the school.
What does "small" mean?
“It’s just you, me, and the class teacher.

We wrote a dictation. When Alla Grigoryevna was checking notebooks, she turned to Antonov:
- Kolya, why are you so inattentive? I dictated: "The door creaked and opened." What did you write? "The door creaked and fell off!"
And everyone laughed!

“Vorobiev,” said the teacher, “you didn’t do your homework again!” Why?
— Igor Ivanovich, we had no electricity yesterday.
— And what were you doing? I suppose you watched TV?
Yeah, in the dark...
And everyone laughed!

A young teacher complains to her friend:
- One of my students completely tortured me: he makes noise, hooligans, disrupts lessons!
“But does he have at least one positive quality?”
- Unfortunately, there is - he does not miss classes ...

At the German lesson, we went through the topic "My Hobby". The teacher called Petya Grigoriev. He stood and was silent for a long time.
“I don’t hear an answer,” said Elena Alekseevna. — What is your hobby?
Then Petya said in German:
— Their bean briefmark! (I'm a postage stamp!)
And everyone laughed!

The lesson has begun. The teacher asked:
- Duty officer, who is missing from the class?
Pimenov looked around and said:
- Missing Mushkin.
At that moment, Mushkin's head appeared in the doorway:
I'm not absent, I'm here!
And everyone laughed!

It was a geometry lesson.
- Who solved the problem? asked Igor Petrovich.
Vasya Rybin was the first to raise his hand.
- Excellent, Rybin, - the teacher praised, - Please, to the blackboard!
Vasya went to the blackboard and said importantly:
Consider triangle ABCD!
And everyone laughed!

Why weren't you at school yesterday?
“My older brother is sick.
— And what about you?
And I rode his bike!

— Petrov, why are you learning English so badly?
- What for?
- What do you mean why? After all, this language is spoken by half of the globe!
“And isn’t that enough?

- Petya, if you met old Hottabych, what wish would you ask him to fulfill?
— I would ask to make London the capital of France.
- Why?
- And I answered yesterday in geography and got a deuce! ..

- Well done, mitya. dad says. — How did you manage to get an A in zoology?
- They asked me how many legs an ostrich has and I answered - three.
“Wait, but an ostrich has two legs!”
— Yes, but all the others said four!

Petya was invited to visit. They tell him:
Petya, take another piece of cake.
Thanks, I've already eaten two pieces.
“Then eat a tangerine.”
Thanks, I've already eaten three tangerines.
“Then take some fruit with you.
Thanks, I already got it!

Cheburashka found a penny on the road. Comes to the store where they sell toys. He gives a penny to the saleswoman and says:
“Give me this toy, this one, and this one!”
The saleswoman looks at him in surprise.
- Well, what are you waiting for? Cheburashka says. - Let's change, and I went!

Vovochka with dad at the zoo are standing by the cage where the lion sits.
- Dad, - says Little Johnny, - and if a lion accidentally jumps out of the cage and eats you, which bus should I take home? ..

- Dad, - asks Little Johnny, - why don't you have a car?
— No money for a car. So don't be lazy, study better, become a good specialist and buy yourself a car.
- Dad, why were you lazy at school?

“Petya,” Dad asks, “why are you limping?”
“I put my foot in the mousetrap and got pinched.
Don't poke your nose where it doesn't belong!

— Grandpa, what are you doing with this bottle? Do you want to install a boat in it?
“That's exactly what I wanted at first. And now I would be glad to just pull my hand out of the bottle!

“Daddy,” the daughter turns to her father, “our phone works ugly!”
- And why did you decide so?
- Now I was talking with my girlfriend and did not understand anything.
Have you tried taking turns speaking?

“Mom,” asked Little Johnny, “how much toothpaste is in the tube?”
- I do not know.
- And I know: from the sofa to the door!

- Dad, get on the phone! Petya called to his father, who was shaving in front of the mirror.
When dad finished the conversation, Petya asked him:
Dad, are you good at remembering faces?
“I seem to remember. And what?
“The thing is, I accidentally broke your mirror…

- Dad, what is "telefigurotivization"?
- I do not know. Where did you read it?
I didn't read it, I wrote it!

- Natasha, why are you writing a letter to your grandmother so slowly?
- It's okay: after all, grandmother also reads slowly!

Anna, what have you done! You broke a vase that was two hundred years old!
What a blessing, Mom! I thought it was brand new!

- Mom, what is etiquette?
- This is the ability to yawn with your mouth closed ...

The art teacher says to Vovochka's father:
“Your son has exceptional abilities. Yesterday he drew a fly on the desk, and I even beat off my hand, trying to drive it away!
— What's that! Recently, he made a crocodile in the bathroom, and I got so scared that I tried to jump out through the door, which was also painted on the wall.

Vovochka says to his father:
- Dad, I decided to give you a present for your birthday!
- The best gift for me, - said dad, - is if you study for one five.
“Too late, dad, I already bought you a tie!”

A little boy is watching his dad at work, who is painting the ceiling.
Mom says:
- Look, Petya, and learn. And when you grow up, you will help dad.
Petya is surprised:
“What, he won’t have finished by then?”

The hostess, hiring a new maid, asked her:
“Tell me, dear, do you like parrots?”
— Oh, don't worry, madam, I eat everything!

An auction is taking place in the pet store - there is a sale of talking parrots. One of the buyers who bought the parrot asks the seller:
Does he really speak well?
- Still would! After all, he was always raising the price!

- Petya, what will you do if you are attacked by hooligans?
- I'm not afraid of them - I know judo, karate, aikedo and other scary words!

— Hello! Animal protecting community? In my yard, a postman sits on a tree and calls my poor dog names with various bad words!

The three bears return to their hut.
— Who touched my plate and ate my porridge?! Papa Bear growled.
Who touched my saucer and ate my porridge?! squeaked the little bear.
“Calm down,” said the mother bear. - There was no porridge: I didn’t cook it today!

One person caught a cold and decided to be treated by self-hypnosis. He stood in front of the mirror and began to suggest to himself:
- I won't sneeze, I won't sneeze, I won't sneeze... A-a-pchhi!!! It's not me, it's not me, it's not me...

“Mommy, why does daddy have so little hair on his head?”
- The fact is that our dad thinks a lot.
"Then why do you have such curly hair?"

- Dad, today the teacher told us about an insect that lives only one day. That's great!
- Why - "great"?
- Imagine, you can celebrate your birthday all your life!

One fisherman, a teacher by profession, caught a small catfish, admired it, and, throwing it back into the river, said:
“Go home and come tomorrow with your parents!”

Husband and wife came by car to visit. Leaving the car at the house, they tied the dog nearby and told her to guard the car. When they got ready to return home in the evening, they saw that all the wheels had been removed from the car. And a note was attached to the car: "Do not scold the dog, it was barking!"

One Englishman went into a bar with a dog and said to the visitors:
- I bet that my talking dog will now read Hamlet's monologue "To be or not to be!"
Alas, he immediately lost the bet. Because the dog didn't say a single word.
Coming out of the bar, the owner began to shout at the dog:
- Are you completely stupid? I lost a thousand pounds because of you!
"You're stupid," said the dog. “Don’t you understand that tomorrow in the same bar we can win ten times more!”

- You have a strange dog - she sleeps all day. How can she guard the house?
- It's very simple: when someone else approaches the house, we wake her up, and she starts barking.

The wolf is going to eat the hare. Hare says:
- Let's agree. I will give you three riddles. If you don't guess them, then you will let me go.
- I agree.
— A pair of black, shiny, with laces.
The wolf is silent.
- It's a pair of shoes. Now the second riddle: four black, shiny, with laces.
The wolf is silent.
- Two pairs of boots. The third riddle is the most difficult: lives in a swamp, green, croaks, starts with "la", ends with "gushka".
The wolf shouts joyfully:
- Three pairs of boots!

Bats hang from the ceiling. All, as expected, heads down, and one - head up. Mice hanging in the neighborhood are talking:
Why is she hanging upside down?
And she does yoga!

The crow found a large piece of cheese. Then a fox suddenly jumped out from behind the bushes and gave the crow a slap on the back of the head. The cheese fell out, the fox immediately grabbed it and ran away.
Stunned crow with resentment says:
- Wow, the fable was reduced!

The out of breath director of the zoo comes running to the police station:
- For God's sake, help - an elephant ran away from us!
"Calm down, citizen," said the policeman. We'll find your elephant. Name special signs!

An owl flies and shouts:
- Uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh!
Suddenly he hit a pole:
- Wow!

A Japanese schoolboy enters a company store that sells watches.
— Do you have a reliable alarm clock?
“There is nowhere safer,” the seller answers. “First, a siren goes off, then an artillery salvo goes off, and a glass of cold water is poured over your face. If that doesn't work, the alarm will ring the school and let you know you've got the flu!

Guide: - in front of you is a rare exhibit of our museum - a beautiful statue of a Greek warrior. Unfortunately, he is missing an arm and a leg, and his head is damaged in some places. The title is "Winner".
Visitor: Great! I'd like to see what's left of the vanquished!

A foreign tourist who has arrived in Paris addresses a Frenchman:
- I come here for the fifth time, and I see that nothing has changed!
– What needs to change? he asks.
Tourist (pointing to the Eiffel Tower):
- In the end, did they find oil here, or not?

One secular lady asked Heine:
What do you need to do to learn to speak French?
- It's not difficult, - he answered, - just instead of German words, you need to use French.

In a history lesson at a French school:
Who was the father of Louis XVI?
— Louis XV.
- Good. What about Charles VII?
— Charles the Sixth.
What about Francis the First? Well, what are you silent?
“Francis… Zero!”

In history class, the teacher said:
Today we will repeat the old material. Natasha, ask Semyonov a question.
Natasha thought about it and asked:
What year was the War of 1812 in?
And everyone laughed.

Parents had no time, and grandfather went to the parent meeting. He came in a bad mood and immediately began to scold his grandson:
- Disgrace! It turns out that you have solid deuces in history! For example, I always had fives in this subject!
“Of course,” the grandson replied, “at the time when you were studying, the story was much shorter!

Baba Yaga asks Koshchei the Deathless:
- How did you relax on New Year's holidays?
- He shot himself a couple of times, drowned himself three times, hanged himself once - in general, he had fun!

Winnie the Pooh congratulated the donkey on his birthday, and then says:
— Eeyore, you must be many years old?
- Why do you say that?
"Judging by your ears, you've been tugged at them a lot!"

The client enters the photo studio and asks the receptionist:
- I wonder why everyone is laughing in your photos?
— And you should have seen our photographer!

- What are you complaining about? the doctor asks the patient.
“You know, by the end of the day I just fall from fatigue.
— What do you do in the evenings?
- I play the violin.
- I recommend that music lessons be stopped immediately!
When the patient left, the nurse asked the doctor in surprise:
- Ivan Petrovich, what does music lessons have to do with it?
- Absolutely nothing. It's just that this woman lives on the floor above me, and we have disgusting soundproofing!

- Yesterday I pulled out a pike weighing twenty kilograms from the hole!
- Can't be!
- That's it, I thought that no one would believe me, so I released it back ...

The summer resident addresses the owner of the dacha:
Could you lower the room rate a little?
- Yes, what are you? With such a beautiful view of the birch grove!
“And if I promise you that I won’t look out the window?”

The millionaire shows his villa to the guest and says:
- And here I am going to build three pools: one with cold water, the second with warm water, and the third without water at all.
- Without water? the guest is surprised. - Why?
The thing is, some of my friends can't swim...

At an art exhibition, one visitor asks another:
Do you think this picture depicts a sunrise or a sunset?
Of course, sunset.
- Why do you think so?
— I know this artist. He doesn't wake up before noon.

Buyer: I would like to buy some book.
Seller: - Do you want something light?
Buyer: It doesn't matter, I'm in a car!

An unknown young man set a world record in the 100 meters. The journalist is interviewing him:
— How did you do it? Have you trained a lot in any sports club?
- No, in the shooting range. I work there to change targets...

- I recently ran two kilometers in one minute at a school competition!
- You're lying! That's better than the world record!
Yes, but I know a shortcut!