In other words, mats. However, it so happened that in our country they can be heard everywhere. Office, public transport, city park, school yard, university - unprintable words surround us, come from literally everywhere. However, if you have already wondered how to stop swearing, you have taken the first, albeit a very small step. But is it possible?

First of all, you need to find the right motivation for this. Perhaps you have small children living in your house, and you do not want them to use foul language, imitating you. Or you just want to maintain the image of a well-mannered, educated person, in which mats do not fit at all.

Historians and linguists believe that literally all obscene words known to us originated from ancient pagan spells. Moreover, these spells were not aimed at something good and bright, but at the destruction and annihilation of the human race. They were used to bring trouble (in particular, infertility) to entire nations. It is no coincidence that most of them are connected in one way or another with the genitals. In fact, the real purpose of these words is a kind of curse.

However, it is not enough to understand that using profanity is bad. What do psychologists advise to those who are looking for a way to stop swearing?

There are many literary words that can be a great substitute for foul language. Note: usually mats break from the tongue when we experience a surge of emotions (most often negative ones). And all because we are too lazy (or our vocabulary does not allow) to find a suitable literary replacement for a particular word.

We often use swear words without realizing it. It would be just perfect if there is a person in your environment who is ready to help you and “control” the flow of words that you speak. This person should patiently rebuke you every time you backtrack on your decision to stop swearing.

For some people who are looking for ways to stop swearing, something like a "penalty system" helps. Such methods can be used both in the family circle and at work (in the second option, you can “cultivate” the whole team!). The point is simple. You buy or make a piggy bank with your own hands and set the amount of the fine. It can be minimal - 5, 10 rubles. However, parting with them because of such a trifle is reluctant, right? The "guilty" must apologize to everyone, and then put the money in a piggy bank.

If you are looking for ways to stop swearing, try to understand that each person reproduces information exactly in the form in which they receive it. Try to read as many newspapers, books, news as possible, where swear words are not used at all. By the way, classical literature, among other things, will help you expand your vocabulary.

Thinking about how to unlearn swearing, some people start a whole notebook in which every day they write down information about how much they said. It is best if such a notebook, tablet or notepad is constantly in your mind. Mindfulness will help you stop scolding, and on average, it takes about 3 weeks to develop the habit of controlling yourself.

For many, punishment is the most effective method. This is where the reflex principle comes into play. For example, you can put on a hand, like a bracelet, an elastic band for money. Every time a swear word comes out of your mouth, you need to pull it back and let it go sharply so that the rubber band hits your arm painfully. Over time, your brain will begin to be afraid to give out swear words.

There is nothing difficult in how to stop cursing a girl or a guy. Do not demand the impossible from yourself: first accustom yourself to the fact that bad words should be pronounced very quietly, almost inaudibly. Then you can keep silent, shorten them, and so on, until they completely disappear from your speech.

And, of course, try to treat everything with a positive attitude - then the need for “curses” will completely disappear over time.

Throughout our lives, we often meet people who use swear words in their everyday speech. At first, a cultured person reacts calmly to this, although he is very indignant inside himself. But still, I really want to be surrounded by people who adhere to certain standards of decency in communication, especially when it comes to being around women and children. On the one hand, it seems that it is quite simple to restrain oneself from the manifestation of gross emotions in verbal form, but on the other hand, many residents of our country do not stop asking themselves the same question: how to stop swearing?

Perhaps, for some, checkmate is obscene language, but for chess players it is their daily bread.
Ashot Nadanyan

The main reasons for the use of swear words

Swear words are present in any language of the world. And often they are pronounced just like that, without reference to any person or event. Unfortunately, in our country there are people who cannot imagine how to communicate without using swear words as interjections. Some of them simply do not notice how they utter curses during daily communication with other people.
What are the reasons for this ubiquitous phenomenon? Why do some individuals in their everyday lives simply cannot do without swearing?

Sometimes a person uses foul language to save himself from communicating with other people or to quickly get out of a conflict. People think that with the help of swear words they can humiliate an opponent or neutralize an unfavorable situation. In both cases, a person experiences fear and foul language is a shield that protects against negativity.

Often swear words are used as a form of protest. For example, if a guy or girl was brought up by strict parents and constantly felt their pressure on them, then, having received a minimum amount of freedom, they can use it, including for obscene verbal expressions. Such people try, with the help of swear words, to release the energy accumulated inside, which they had previously kept “locked up”. Psychologists call this factor the “crisis of adolescence” and note that in modern boys and girls its duration has increased compared to previous generations.

historical retreat

In the old days, swear words in Russia were used to protect against curses that could bring illness and other troubles to a person.
Such an urgent need may arise in our time. For example, if a gypsy stuck up to you on the street with an offer to tell fortunes, and you want to get around this situation, you can hear various curses from her. To protect yourself from a large accumulation of negative energy, you begin to swear at her and this often helps, since such words break through the “field” of the gypsy and she lags behind you.

Swear words as a form of humiliation of a woman

Over the past few centuries, the way of life of people has changed a lot. Women are increasingly subject to emancipation and try to keep up with men in everything. This also applies to swear words, which were considered the prerogative of the stronger sex. With their help, women want to show their superiority and express aggression, thereby gaining authority among the male society.

Recently, women can increasingly be seen in men's positions, and for this they try to use obscene language in their communication so as not to get out of the rut. In a work collective, most of which are representatives of the stronger sex, a young girl sometimes has to defend herself with the same swear words. But it is better for beautiful ladies to use their natural charm in this case, and not to become like rude men. This behavior of a woman can be compared with a representative of the stronger sex, in whose appearance feminine features predominate.

Many mothers and fathers look forward to their child's first words. But what can kids remember if parents endlessly swear in their presence? It is worth remembering that a small child always tries to imitate adults, especially those who are his closest people.

The main ways to get rid of the mat

Before you utter this or that swear word in relation to another person, you should think carefully, maybe this is due to certain differences in your character that you want to get rid of or just try not to pay attention to them. Often the negative traits that you observe in other people irritate you greatly. But sometimes it turns out that you react to it too emotionally for the reason that you yourself have these shortcomings.

In a circle of cultured and educated people, your style of communication using swear words can instantly alienate the interlocutor and he will no longer want to communicate with you and will bypass you. It is then that you will begin to think about how to stop swearing and find an adequate replacement for these rude and offensive words. In this case, remember the famous film "Gentlemen of Fortune" and try to use in your speech instead of swearing its various humorous counterparts such as:

• radish;
• sausage;
• novohudonosor.

Some consider the use of swear words in everyday speech as one of the forms of addiction, similar to alcohol or tobacco. What to do to get rid of it and how to stop swearing?

To begin with, start to control your speech and in a few days you will notice the positive results of this process. In this case, it will become easier not only to express thoughts, but also to control your consciousness. Even if you were rude in public transport or at work, try not to respond in kind, but inside yourself forgive this person and wish him all the best. You will see that your heart will immediately feel lighter.

Swear words significantly lower the level of speech culture, creating an extremely unpleasant impression on the interlocutor about who pronounces them. Unfortunately, most people often sin by using obscene language. And many of them understand that it is impossible to swear. But they cannot or do not want to get rid of this bad habit.

A brief excursion into history

Those who want to know how to unlearn swearing will certainly be interested in the history of the origin of swear words. The roots of obscene language go deep into the past. In Russia, mat began to be used as early as the fifteenth century with the advent of the Mongol-Tatars. Oddly enough, up to this point, all insults were limited to the names of animals. So, the most common abuse at that time was such words as “pig” or “donkey”. Today, the use of obscene language in public places is considered petty hooliganism, for which, according to the law, a fine or arrest for fifteen days is imposed.

Positive thinking and good music

Those who have realized that there is no need to swear, and have seriously decided to eradicate this bad habit, can be advised to tune in to the positive. After all, many of us begin to swear just when something makes us nervous. It is necessary to try to distract from annoying factors and not pay special attention to them. You need to try to develop resistance to stressful situations and not worry about trifles. Don't be annoyed by the sudden onset of rain or the lack of money in the nearest ATM.

Those who constantly think about how to unlearn swearing should listen to as much of any good music as possible. It can be classical pieces or any other beautiful compositions. To make sure that swearing to music is much more difficult, you can conduct a simple experiment. While listening to your favorite tune, try cursing and see what happens. If at the moment when you feel like scolding, there is no music nearby, you can start humming your favorite song instead of bad words.

Reading the classics and changing the social circle

People who do not know how to stop swearing can be recommended to read more classical works. Literature not only contributes to the polishing of speech, but also allows you to tune in to the positive. In this case, there is another important point that must be paid attention to. Before you stop swearing, you need to reconsider your own social circle. It is advisable to abandon friendship with people whose vocabulary is filled with obscene expressions. It should be remembered that the less often you meet with such people, the less often you will swear. You need to communicate exclusively with those who monitor their speech and do not use swear words.

Be a good example for children

A lot of people don't really know how to stop swearing. But they really want to do this, they are guided by the fact that they do not want their children to repeat swear words. In order not to “infect” the younger generation with your bad habit, you must constantly control your own speech. Under no circumstances should you swear in front of children. After all, they very quickly absorb not only good, but also bad. Therefore, your main goal should be to establish complete control over your words. Feeling that an irresistible urge to swear is growing in you, try to switch your attention to something else. You can do gymnastics at this moment. Physical exercise is considered one of the most effective ways to overcome aggression.

What else can be done?

For those who do not know how to stop swearing, we can give one more valuable advice. To succeed, you need to enlist the support of family or friends. It is advisable to ask someone who is constantly nearby to remind you of the need to be more restrained and control your speech. In addition, you can try to figure out in which situations you swear most often, and gradually replace obscene words with decent counterparts. Alternatively, you can get a special piggy bank into which you will throw coins if you accidentally curse. Such a piggy bank can be put not only at home, but also at work.

For every swear word that comes out of your mouth, flick your wrist painfully with a rubber band. As a result, after a short time, obscene language will become associated with pain and will leave your vocabulary forever. According to most modern scientists, it takes only 21 days to permanently eradicate any bad habit that has formed. In some particularly advanced cases, this takes a little longer. But, one way or another, it is the first three weeks that are considered extremely important. After all, according to experts, during this period the foundation is laid, allowing you to gradually move towards your goal.

Researchers have long recognized obscene language as one of the types of verbal aggression and a way to throw out negativity at the interlocutor, because any word spoken by a person carries energy. Sometimes the use of swearing becomes so commonplace that we do not even notice how often we raise our voice and express a point of view through abuse.

Obscene language, used with or without it, significantly reduces the overall vocabulary, makes speech poor and vulgar. In addition, swearing causes a painful and unpleasant impression on a well-mannered and cultured interlocutor, suggests thoughts about the mental and psychological state of a person (as you know, people who are notorious, suffering from low self-esteem and other problems swear more often).

Swearing is so firmly embedded in our vocabulary that sometimes, even realizing the problem, getting rid of it is not easy, because it requires a lot of endurance and self-control, and the first step is to identify the reasons for the frequent use of swear words.

Three types of behavior and three main motives:

How to stop cursing

First of all, realize that mating is not the root cause and main problem in your life, but just a by-product of tension and psychological discomfort that is felt for a long time. Initially, a negative worldview, anger, a critical perception of oneself is formed, which is why it is so important to do introspection if you really want to solve a number of problems, including stop cursing. Take a piece of paper and write down the answers to a few questions:

• Remember in what situations do you use swearing most often, what people, events are the provoking factor?
• How does taboo vocabulary help you and how does it interfere with communicating with people?
• Imagine that you were able to cope with the problem and no longer swear. Have there been positives in your life? Or, on the contrary, now there is no way to pour out aggression?
• Are such words really necessary, are they so important to you?

• Arrange for a friend or relative with whom you spend the most time to reprimand you whenever you scold or do not contain your anger.
• At first, avoid provoking factors - driving, long lines, conflicts with unpleasant people, listening to obscene songs, etc.
• In a team, it is very effective to fight swearing with the help of a piggy bank, in which you need to put a certain amount for each spoken swear word.
• Try to change the style of speech - start replacing any swearing with decent words, thinking over each phrase and saying it to yourself.

If a child swears - what to do

If you suddenly find that your baby knows how to speak obscenely like a real shoemaker, it's time to reconsider your parenting methods because, most likely, the child's behavior is the result of parental indifference. When mom and dad are busy with something of their own and do not pay attention to their baby, why not attract attention with a swear word, ideally when this happens in a public place and a large audience becomes a witness. Slaps, exhortations and stern lectures will have no positive effect, and possibly even worse consequences.

Before starting the fight against children's swearing, it is necessary to find out what the motives for the "crime" are, they depend, first of all, on the age of the child:

The eradication of obscenities from a child's speech should not be accompanied by the same swear words, otherwise the ban will not be effective. When banning something, be sure to back up the monologue with arguments and your own example. Don't shame your child in public and don't use slaps on the lips as punishment.

• From the very moment the baby is born, make sure that relatives in his environment do not use taboo vocabulary.
• If the swear word nevertheless flew off the baby’s lips, for the first time pretend that you didn’t notice this and follow his reaction. If a child waits for a response from you, then he understands the meaning of the forbidden word well and simply provokes his parents. Perhaps, without waiting for the punishment, he will lose interest in the word and forget about it.
• When an incident occurs in a public place, do not boil over and do not scold the offspring. Apologize, pretend that nothing criminal happened and continue the conversation. And at home, having calmed down, express your opinion about the behavior of the child.
• Often children themselves ask to explain the meaning of a particular word. Try to convey to the baby that this word is abusive, it is pronounced only when they want to offend the interlocutor.
• If the mat nevertheless appeared in, ask your son or daughter to tell you what this or that word means to him, whether they know its meaning. Try replacing it with a similar but more decent phrase.

Until about the middle of the 19th century, foul language in Russia was a criminal offense. During the time of Tsar Alexei Mikhailovich Romanov, a person was subjected to public flogging with rods for using swear words!

Obscene speech has always been considered a sign of lack of culture and belonging to a low class. It was a kind of pointer: before you is an uneducated person, leading a dubious lifestyle and not striving for positive changes.

Why do people swear

To talk about the lack of education of modern people is absurd. Now more than ever, the environment provides an incredible amount of resources for raising the cultural level, self-development and creativity. It is logical that the checkmate should have become an ordinary atavism. So what's the reason?

1. The need for protection and self-affirmation

Obscene language is a unique phenomenon. It exists, but speaking it is forbidden by society. As you know, ignoring the rules occurs either out of naivety, or out of fear and hopelessness. So lovers of a strong word can not be called in any way.

A person tries to hide vulnerability and self-doubt behind a demonstration of aggressiveness, independence and rudeness.

The more a person experiences confusion, disorientation in life, the more often he resorts to obscenities. Like a scared and angry animal. Growling, hissing and showing fangs.

As a result, teenagers swear because of the fear that they will not be accepted as real. It is easier to assert oneself according to the general laws of the pack, to be like everyone else. And adults, bearing a huge burden of responsibility, swear to drown out the feeling of fear due to possible failures.

The saddest thing is when people use swear words in communication with each other. Insulting and humiliating the interlocutor, the opponent tries to assert himself at the expense of the other and at least for a second feel his superiority. Albeit in an inappropriate way from a moral and ethical point of view.

2. Sloth of mind

Indeed, why strain and waste energy on the correct construction of sentences, the selection of expressive words and the use of effective oratory techniques.

After all, why waste time explaining in long-winded florid phrases what can be expressed in a second in one word.

Pronounced "bl ..." with different intonation coloring will save the sleeping brain and not disturb the memory. Disappointed: “Well, dear Klavdia Petrovna, you again forgot about the existence of a new model for writing memos.” Aggressively: "Colleague, didn't you see that you were putting this heavy box right on my leg." Admiringly: “Look how unusually beautiful it is around!”

The ability to fully and beautifully communicate is replaced by useless lowing of different duration and tone. Gradually, the vocabulary is depleted, and it becomes more and more difficult to speak the correct Russian language.

3. Constant tension and stress

It has long been proven that the mat briefly helps to let off steam and feel in working order again. Modern people have enough reasons for stress and conflict situations.

A person uses foul language as a defense against the outside world. He's like a bristling hedgehog.

Such a person constantly experiences such strong psychological discomfort that over and over again he simply ceases to notice the problems of other people, becomes less sympathetic, benevolent.

And this model of behavior is transferred to the whole worldview, a negative self-perception is formed, other people and events begin to annoy. It has been proven that swear words increase the level of adrenaline, body temperature and pressure. Like alcohol or drugs.

A person understands that he is beginning to be sucked into a destructive funnel of aggressiveness, a split in interpersonal relationships, and a lack of self-understanding. He loses control of himself and his life.

How to stop cursing

It turns out that the mat does not exist by itself, but is a side effect of the negative changes taking place in a person.

It is useless to force yourself not to swear. You need to find the root cause and understand yourself.

Take some time for introspection. Take paper and a pen, sit comfortably in your favorite chair, relax. Write down your ideas and thoughts.

1. Try to remember what was the prerequisite for the use of swearing in your speech. Write down on a piece of paper the actions and words of other people, situations because of which you usually swear.
2. To what extent does foul language help you, and under what circumstances? What hinders its use?
3. Imagine that you stopped cursing. Are you more comfortable? Or, on the contrary, do you want to pour out the accumulated aggression and negative emotions in other forms?
4. How badly do you need checkmate?

Analyze your answers. Think over a plan of action to return the beautiful Russian language to your speech based on the recommendations given.

Change your attitude towards people and circumstances. Having understood the reasons that make you want to swear, try to either change your attitude towards them, or delete them from your life.

For example, you swear while driving. It is clear that you are constantly worried internally, being responsible for the passengers and the safety of the car. Pedestrians scurrying across the road anywhere and dashing drivers are perceived by you as a potential threat. You are afraid, this is normal.

But is there any point in getting angry and foul language, thereby reducing the concentration of attention behind the wheel? Other road users are unlikely to pay attention to you, and the mat will not change the overall situation on the road. Maybe it's easier to exhale and, singing your favorite melody, calmly drive home in a great mood, without winding yourself up.

Learn to relax. You can relieve stress by doing sports, your favorite hobby, spending time with loved ones or in nature. As you learn to make time for yourself and de-stress, you will find yourself using foul language less and less.

Build your confidence. You cannot endlessly assert yourself at the expense of other people. You need your own inner core, a sense of yourself as a person that you respect, appreciate and love. The one who is self-confident, has inner strength and a strong spirit, will never allow himself to humiliate a person and go through his pride.

Try to control your emotions. The most effective option is to mentally count to ten before answering an unpleasant person or reacting to the current situation. Replace obscene words with alternative expressions from normal Russian. It takes a little practice and patience to get used to.

Constantly develop. Don't stop there. Read more quality literature, replenish your vocabulary. Go to virtual educational platforms, improve your skills, master related specialties, take an interest in the world. Set new goals, dream, move forward.

This will give you self-confidence, make positive changes in your life. It is likely that you will meet interesting people with whom it is pleasant to talk without swearing. In addition, you will learn to enjoy the use of beautiful and rich turns of speech.