Psychologist's advice, what should parents do if the child is hyperactive? hyperactive child. How to deal with a hyperactive child

When hugs become medicine OR how to deal with a child's hyperactivity.

“Because of restlessness and restlessness, such a child immediately catches the eye,” Elena Nikitina, a psychologist at the Center for Family Psychology, describes a hyperactive child.

"Such a child is impatient and fussy. Impulsive and aggressive. Cannot keep attention on one thing for more than 5-10 minutes. He talks a lot and quickly, asks countless questions, but does not wait for answers to his questions, because he manages to get interested in a minute something else," the psychologist completes the picture.

These symptoms, as well as excessive nervous excitement, insufficient control over movements and emotions, poor coordination of movements, and rapid fatigue determine the hyperactivity syndrome.

Many experts note an annual increase in the number of children with this mental disorder. For example, Lidiya Kulik, a pediatric neurologist at the Okhmatdet National Children's Specialized Hospital, notes that the situation in her practice has worsened by 20% over the past 5 years. As well as the fact that boys are three times more vulnerable to this disease than girls.

The vast majority of parents begin to worry about such unusual behavior of children when it is time to prepare for school (the peak of the disease occurs at 5-7 years of age). It is then that it becomes clear that the child is unlikely to endure the time allotted for the lesson at the desk. In addition, he will probably have difficulty finding friends.

“If such a child likes a toy while playing with other kids, the first push will be to take it away from him, and not ask him to play,” says Elena Nikitina. “If only for this reason, they are not very successful in communicating with peers.

On the playground, hyperactive children are like a tornado that destroys everything and everyone in its path. Therefore, parents of other babies try to keep their child as far away from them as possible. Accordingly, hyperactive children have a problem of social adaptation.

Although, with some exceptions, hyperactivity does not affect a child's general intelligence, therefore, problems with school performance may arise mainly due to restlessness, inability to concentrate and poor memory; at school they are unwanted students, they are not perceived.

Of course, it is more convenient for teachers to send such a child to a psychiatrist or neurologist than to look for an approach to him. Therefore, in our country, many hyperactive children are transferred to individual education, thus delaying the pace of their overall development and socialization.

Given the annual deterioration of the situation, today the issue of hyperactivity is of concern not only to parents, doctors and psychologists, but also to government officials. After all, according to some expert estimates, there are between 300,000 and 500,000 such children in Russia alone today.

Psi Factors

The father brought the boy with hyperactivity syndrome to the center of psychology. The psychologist takes care of the child, and dad is waiting for 8-year-old Misha in a chair, reading a newspaper. Both are interesting to watch: a man, dangling his leg, fidgets in his chair, throws sheets with sharp movements; the boy also dangles with his leg, at the same time shaking the chair, on which he cannot sit quietly.

During a conversation with a psychologist, it turned out that in childhood my father had a neurologist's record in his medical record about increased nervous excitability.

According to experts, in many cases, hyperactivity in children is genetically determined. By the way, in adolescence and in adults, the vast majority of the symptoms of the disease are smoothed out due to better self-control.

In some cases, hyperactivity is a consequence of brain injury, pathological childbirth or pregnancy with complications. Lydia Kulik talks about not isolated cases of the onset of the disease in children born by caesarean section.

In addition, it should be noted another important factor in the occurrence of the disease - socio-psychological. It is possible that, to some extent, hyperactive syndrome is a disease of modern society, the 21st century and the acceleration of the rhythm of life.

Kulik is convinced that the computer and TV play an important role in its appearance, because they splash out showers of negative information to the masses, provoke aggression and nervous excitability not only in children, but also in adults.

However, the socio-psychological aspect of this disease is, first of all, the influence of the family. This is not only about dysfunctional families in which, for example, one of the parents suffers from alcoholism.

Quite the opposite, because only by watching the child, you can understand about their problems. As we know, a child is, in fact, a mirror image of the relationship between parents.

love = heal

"Don't touch! Put it down immediately! When will you finally be like all children! Not a child, but what a horror!" - The mother in the neurologist's office screams at the baby, tearing out of his hands and returning to the doctor's table the doll that the child had just taken.

Child with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder ADHD) , tense and nervous woman brought to the reception with a request to cure. An ordinary child, in principle, should not be treated in this way, and especially with a hyperactive one.

These children are extremely sensitive and vulnerable, have low self-esteem. Any harsh criticism of them, comparison with other children, increases their self-doubt. However, it is easier for parents to yell at a child or punish him than to show patience by calmly pointing out to the child his mistakes.

Having some experience, Lydia Kulik believes that sometimes, looking at parents, one can confidently assert that it is they, and not the children, who need help, at least psychological.

Elena Cherepanova, a psychologist at the Center for Child and Family Psychology "I + family" says that hyperactivity is often found in children from families where there are no warm emotions.

Hyperactive children are treated both with medications (stimulants, amphetamines) and with the help of various psychological techniques and exercises aimed at fostering self-control, developing communication skills, perseverance and attention (correction is developed individually).

For such children, a regimen, a special diet (restriction in sweets) are mandatory, classes for the development of tactile sensations (sculpting, drawing with fingers), playing with water are useful for them; sport; and in general they require special handling.

These methods are certainly effective. However, it is possible to really help a child, and not partially relieve the symptoms of the disease, only on the condition that the parents want to help, and not simplify their lives.

Therefore, we are ready not only to spend a long time on classes, adhering to one line of education, but also to work on ourselves: to solve our own psychological problems, to improve the microclimate in the family.

To begin with, it is worth trying to accept the personality of the baby. Try to love him for who he is, and do not hesitate to show these feelings. At least with the help of the "Rule of 8 hugs", which Elena Nikitina offers.

"Hug your child AT LEAST 8 times a day so that he feels your love, which he really needs."

For any child, this is important, especially for a hyperactive one. Moreover, hugs soothe and relieve stress. Love, according to experts, is the best medicine.

Article sent by: laiem

"Perpetual motion machine" - this is how tired parents, exhausted educators and teachers speak about a hyperactive child. It is he who periodically falls out of the crib in infancy, and at the age of five it is impossible to captivate him with an interesting fairy tale or favorite cartoon for at least 20 minutes. In elementary school, the problems only get worse. Where does excessive activity in children come from and how to deal with it?

What is hyperactivity?

According to experts, this condition manifests itself in babies in the form of excessive activity, restlessness and a lot of unnecessary movements. Most of all, this behavior is typical for preschoolers, since their nervous system is still too unstable.

Boys suffer from hyperactivity several times more often than girls. Doctors explain this by the fact that they are usually larger than female babies at birth, which is fraught with various injuries. Also, the regions of the brain responsible for regulation and control mature much later in boys.

Currently, the number of children with this disorder of the central nervous system has increased significantly. Doctors' statistics are disappointing - signs of the disease are observed in about 40% of preschool children and in half of primary school students. Which, you see, is a lot!

Manifestations of hyperactivity

Overactivity Syndrome has many symptoms. We list the main ones:

  • Lack of attention

The kid is not able to concentrate for a long time on one lesson that requires some effort from him: coloring, reading, watching TV, solving examples. It is because of inattention that such children often experience difficulties with their studies.

  • Impulsiveness

Hyperactive children are often thoughtless, constantly in a hurry, answering before the question has been asked. It is difficult for them to wait for their turn and plan something in advance. Therefore, relationships with classmates and classmates often deteriorate, and parents attend school with the same frequency as work.

  • Excessive mobility

It is almost impossible to catch such a child in complete peace - he either runs, or jumps, or kicks his legs if he was asked to sit on a chair. Also, a hyperactive child can be recognized by the richest facial expressions, shifty eyes and restless fingers. He usually moves skipping, forcing his mother to run after him.

  • mood swings

It is difficult for parents to understand the emotional state of their children. They have unpredictable behavior, and emotional outbursts occur without any obvious reason. The baby can become aggressive and even cruel at one moment, and after a quarter of an hour it is already nice to talk with mommy or peers.

  • bad memory

Due to low concentration of attention, impulsive actions and excessive distractibility, children, as a rule, do not remember and absorb information well.

Causes of hyperactivity

The basis of this disease is a minimal brain dysfunction that disrupts the course of mental processes and causes all of the above features in a child. But the provoking factors of such a disorder are:

  • The course of pregnancy

Severe toxicosis, high blood pressure, fetal hypoxia, mother's use of alcohol, nicotine or drugs, exposure to toxic substances increase the likelihood of having a hyperactive baby.

Moms take note!


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  • Adverse delivery

Prematurity, prolonged or, conversely, rapid labor, their artificial stimulation, as well as the use of various obstetric aids (in particular, forceps) can lead to hyperactivity.

  • genetic predisposition

You should not be surprised if your offspring has a similar disease if you yourself suffered at a young age from impulsive and disinhibited behavior.

How to help a child?

Some adults raising hyperactive kids often lose their temper and lash out at them, despite all the love and care. Other mothers and fathers give up, believing that nothing good will come of their crumbs. Still others are trying to take the baby into a "hedgehog", introducing the most stringent disciplinary measures.

Of course, every overly active child is a bright individual, which means that he needs a special approach. However, knowledge of the general psychological characteristics of such children allows specialists to give some recommendations that will help you find the key to your offspring.

  • Clearly formulate tasks

Due to difficulty with concentration and high distractibility, set specific tasks for the baby. Your phrases should be short, clear, without unnecessary details. Try to avoid overloaded structures.

  • Follow the sequence

Never give your hyperactive child multiple orders at once. How often do you tell the kids: “Come on, put away the cars, wash your hands and sit down at the table”? The child will not be able to immediately perceive such a volume of information and, perhaps, will not complete a single task, but will be carried away by something else. Give the following directions as you go.

  • Correctly formulate prohibitions

Such children are extremely negative about the word "no", so try not to use it. For example, instead of the categorical taboo "Do not walk in a puddle," say: "Let's better walk along a dry path." And, of course, in any conflict situation, try to remain calm.

  • Set time limits

Young children generally have little idea of ​​time, so you will need to keep track of your task yourself. If you plan to put the baby to sleep, distract him from the game, call him for dinner, you must warn him in advance: “In five minutes we will have dinner.”

  • Direct energy in a "peaceful direction"

To make your child calmer, try to walk with him in the fresh air, enroll him in a sports club, go to rides more often, ride a bike, skate or play ball. In general, find the kind of activity that will give him sincere pleasure.

  • Provide medical treatment

Be sure to seek help from a neurologist, who will not only make the correct diagnosis, but will also be able to choose the right pharmacological drug. Medical statistics say that the effects of drugs are effective in 80% of cases of hyperactivity: behavior improves, self-control increases.

If a restless hurricane child is growing in your family and you do not understand what to do, first of all, try to be patient and know that in no case does he want to annoy you. Do not be afraid to seek qualified support from a neurologist or psychologist, follow their recommendations and our advice. And do not forget that your child is no worse than other children, and also needs your love and understanding. Subject to these conditions, you will be able to grow a collected and calm teenager from a small prankster.

Increasingly recently, parents complain that children are simply uncontrollable. They are inattentive, restless, disobedient, unable to communicate... The list of such "not" can be continued for a long time, but this will not change the problem. And the essence of it lies in the fact that the child has symptoms ADHD- Attention deficit hyperactivity disorder. Such hyperactive children not "lazy" and not "poorly educated", they are just different. They need a special approach. Character hyperactive child complicates life not only for parents, but also for himself.

ADHD- this is perhaps the most common neuropsychiatric disorder today, which is observed not only in children, but also in adults. Usually children with such deviations are bad at school, suffer from misunderstanding and, as a result of all this, have low self-esteem. The main signs of the behavior of such a child are impulsiveness, inattention and hyperactivity. Moreover, if the signs of hyperactivity can gradually decrease over the years, then inattention and impulsivity remain for life, interfering with the normal existence of the individual in society.

Hyperactivity manifests itself most clearly in preschool and primary school age. Such child restless, fussy, often distracted, has some permanent signs of motor restlessness. For example, he constantly rubs his palms, adjusts his glasses, bites his nails, twists everything in his hands that comes across - from plasticine to a bookmark in a textbook.

Signs of hyperactivity in a child

A child can be diagnosed with hyperactivity only if, for a period of at least 6 months, he has constantly observed at least 6 of the following signs:

1. If the child, sitting on a chair, fidgets and spins endlessly, and restless unconscious movements of the hands and feet are observed.

2. Often gets up in class during lessons or at other times when it is necessary to remain still.

3. Shows aimless motor activity at those moments when it is unacceptable - tries to climb somewhere, get something, spins, hurries somewhere.

4. Cannot play quiet games and study alone and in silence

5. Acts like he has a motor like Carlson and can't be stopped.

6. The child is very talkative.

7. Answers questions without thinking, and therefore often out of place.

8. Can hardly wait for his turn in all situations.

9. Often intrusive, interferes in the conversations and games of others.

The optimal age for diagnosis is the period of 4-5 years, when we can already talk about attention disorder. The diagnosis itself can only be made by specialists - a neurologist and a psychiatrist.

Help for children with ADHD

Next, it is important to understand that ADHD It is not a disease and cannot be cured with drugs alone. We must try to help hyperactive child learn to live in peace with society and with oneself. The choice of further actions will be individual in nature, depending on the severity of ADHD manifestations. The approach should be comprehensive and include appropriate work with parents, teachers, psychotherapy, possibly prescribing medication.

A lot can be done with treatment of hyperactivity in children, sometimes even fairy tale therapy helps: you can not only introduce your child to fairy tale characters with the help of a book, but also invite the hero of fairy tales to the baby for his birthday (this is wonderfully written on this site).

1. Try to always keep your baby in a positive mood - emphasize his successes, especially in those cases where perseverance and patience are required. Help him gain confidence in his own abilities.

2. If possible, exclude the expressions “no” and “cannot” from everyday life. Try to simply switch the baby's attention to something else.

3. Try to keep a soft, calm tone in a conversation with a child, no matter how difficult it may be for you.

4. If the child needs to complete several tasks, then give each of them in turn and set the exact time during which he must complete it.

5. Maintain a strict daily routine.

6. Avoid large crowds. For a child with a diagnosis ADHD this is exciting, and it is difficult to calm him down afterwards.

7. Do not suppress the child's motor activity, just try to direct it in the right direction. Suitable for jogging and walking in the fresh air, sports games, swimming, dancing.

And the most important advice to parents of children with a diagnosis ADHD: Don't get locked into your problem. It has been known for a long time, and there are ways to deal with its manifestations. Search as much information as possible on this topic and choose what is most suitable for you and for your hyperactive child.

More than 200 years ago, the German physician Heinrich Hoffmann was the first to describe hyperactive child and called him "Fidget Phil". But only in the 60s of the XX century, doctors began to evaluate excessive mobility not as a trait of character, but as an incorrigible mental defect.

A teaspoon per hour

You came home from work in the evening, and your son did not do the simplest: the bed is not made, the sock thrown in the center of the room two days ago is still lying, and everything is strewn with chips. You ask: “Was it really difficult to lift? How are you not ashamed? Why are you torturing me like this?"

These questions are incomprehensible even for an ordinary child, and the consciousness of a hyperactive one passes them through like a colander water. Only specifics catch him - it’s better to start right from the sock without unnecessary emotions.

Do not offer large-scale plans like cleaning an apartment to a hyperactive child. Fear of too big a task. His ability to concentrate on one thing is limited. So what, let him wash a teaspoon per hour, says Dr. Martin. The main thing is that you have the patience to give these "spoons" regularly, load and not be annoyed that your fast child does everything so slowly.

I don't live by order!

– Get ready, please! We have to leave in five minutes! - the mother addresses her eleven-year-old daughter. She continues to do her own thing, because, firstly, for her there are no “we”, there is only “I”, and secondly, the word “should” is too vague. She begins to torment her mother with questions: “Why exactly in five minutes, and not in six?”, “Who should?”. And this is just the beginning of a long, pointless discussion. Do you want your child to start gathering? Interest him: “Can you pack things in three and a half minutes?”.

It is very important that the task sound in the form of a question, not an order. And then the result will not keep you waiting.

Soundless

If you want to be heard, whisper. The louder we shout, swear, the more likely they will turn us off. Hyperactive children are capable of this "switch-off" like no other. During periods of great showdown, we look to them like fish, silently opening their mouths. Such is their protection from parental emotions. But as soon as you begin to whisper, they will begin to listen. And then your word will be worth its weight in gold. Sometimes it is useful to communicate without words at all, a “traffic light” system has even been developed for young children, where red is a sign of prohibition, yellow is alarm, and green is permission. Hyperactive children are much more sensitive to pictures than to verbal information.

Interrogation not needed

The worst thing that can be demanded during a conversation with a daughter or son is: “Look me straight in the eye!”. Dr. Martin teaches parents not to look for eye contact and to allow the child to turn something in his hands during the conversation - a pencil, a toy, a handkerchief ... "Manual employment" increases his ability to concentrate. But if he stands up straight and looks into your eyes, all his strength will be spent on maintaining this stance. And the meaning of the words will fly by.

On their own

The teenage son came home from school irritated, it was a bad day. To the question: "What happened?" replies, "None of your business!" Parents can explode and punish, they can sympathize. But experts advise: it is better to stay in your mood. Read a magazine, watch TV, cook dinner - keep doing it.

If the child feels that the adult is not irritated, he calms down. Ideal parents for hyperactive children are those who are able to maintain a stone calmness in any situation. There are few of them, usually in hyperactive children, parents themselves quickly become irritable. And then the question arises: who is educating whom here?

incomprehensible word

A twelve-year-old girl has been torturing her mother for the third hour in various variations:

“Well, why can’t you bring a couple of white rats into the house, why?

The mother asks in despair:

- You don't understand the word "no"?

The girl frankly admits:

- I do not understand.

And it is true. An ordinary child will be upset by the ban, but he will quickly outlive it. For a hyperactive "no" - a small catastrophe, an excuse to put adults under siege, by any means to force them to change "no" to "yes".

Psychologists, working with hyperactive children, use the following reward system: the best prize goes to those who could, if not the first, but at least the second time, accept “no” without disputes. In addition to rewards, there is also punishment, for example, the child should write on paper five or ten times: “I will try to accept the refusal calmly.” They say that this measure is very effective.

Inequality

Hyperactive kids need to know that there is a Boss in their house. As soon as they notice that the boss is not there, they immediately take his place.

It is very difficult for single mothers to cope with a son-boss or daughter-boss. Children begin to correct: “You don’t cook like that,” or even evaluate: “You’re raising me wrong!” This brings parents to tears.

One father, having come home from work, and after listening to his 15-year-old son, who did not comply with any of his requests (because “it was all stupid”), said: “If you argued with the boss at work like that, you would just be fired immediately” . From the eyes of his son, he realized that the young man was surprised, scared for the future, and therefore, without further reminders, he went to take out the garbage.

War and Peace

When a parent just opens their mouth to talk to the child, he must know what he wants - war or peace. Hyperactive people always have something to scold for, so there is a reason for war. But if you want peace, you must first bring yourself to your senses. Before an educational conversation, you should sit in a chair, and throw your legs on the table - from this position it is more difficult to press and shout. Our peace of mind is just what a hyperactive child needs. Only it helps him, protects, gives confidence.

“I will surprise you yet,” says the thirteen-year-old son, who has hundreds of undertakings in his plans and not one has yet been brought even to the middle. But you have to believe and not tell him too much.

Relatives, educators and teachers call a hyperactive child a real “perpetual motion machine”. Even at a very early age, he could fall out of his crib from time to time. And already at the age of 5, it is almost impossible to captivate this child with an interesting fairy tale or watching a cartoon. When a child starts going to school, the problems only get worse. How does this phenomenon appear and can it be overcome?

What is hyperactivity

Experts characterize this concept as a manifestation of an overabundance of activity in young children. Such children cannot sit still and make a large number of unnecessary movements. Preschool children do not yet have a fully stable nervous system, so this behavior is often observed in them.

In boys, hyperactivity is observed many times more often than in girls. Experts believe that this is due to the large size of boys at birth, which often leads to various kinds of damage. In boys, compared to girls, those parts of the brain that regulate self-control are formed later.

Today, the number of children with this disorder is increasing. According to statistics, there are about 40% of such children among preschoolers. And among primary school students, about half of them. These figures are thought-provoking and cause concern among physicians.

This disorder is manifested by many symptoms. Here are the main ones.

Lack of attention

The child cannot for a long time be focused on any one thing that requires attention and effort. This includes reading a book, doing math, and even watching a cartoon. Due to the inability to pay attention, children often get poor grades in school.

Impulsiveness

Children with this syndrome often make rash actions, rush, answer the question before the interlocutor finishes it. They have difficulty planning things and cannot wait in line. As a result, their relationships with other children deteriorate, parents are increasingly being called to kindergarten or school.

Mobility

This child is constantly on the move. Watching him, you can see that he constantly runs and jumps around the room. If you ask him to sit down, he will dangle his legs or wave his arms. The child cannot walk comfortably. He either runs or hops around. He has a very lively face, shifty eyes.

Mood changes

Parents cannot understand why the baby's mood changes so often. It is difficult to predict a child's behavior. Sometimes, for no good reason, a surge of emotions can occur. In an instant, a child can become angry and cruel, and a short time after that, turn into a cute child.

bad memory

When a baby cannot concentrate his attention, constantly performs rash actions, is distracted from business, it is very difficult for him to remember information.

Causes of hyperactivity

The syndrome is based on brain dysfunction, which leads to disruption of the normal course of processes associated with the psyche. As a result, the child suffers from all of the above problems. What provokes the development of hyperactivity?

Pregnancy period

If a woman suffered from toxicosis during pregnancy, her pressure increased, fetal hypoxia was observed, this increases the chances of giving birth to a child with hyperactivity. Also, the likelihood of this violation increases if the expectant mother smokes, drinks alcohol, drugs.

Birth disorders

Various factors can lead to this violation. The chances increase if the baby was born prematurely, the birth was rapid or long. The cause may also be stimulation or the use of forceps.

Predisposition

If parents in childhood suffered from this problem, then the child may be hyperactive.

Parents of hyperactive children often lash out at them because of this behavior. Some are already losing hope of changing anything in the child, and simply give up. There are parents who try to bring up a child with great severity, instilling discipline in him in this way.

But these children require a special approach. However, each of them has something in common. Therefore, you can try to correct the situation by following the general recommendations of specialists.

Clearly formulate the task

Since such children have great difficulty concentrating, parents should learn to set the task for the baby as clearly as possible. These should be short phrases that contain everything you need to understand the meaning. Offers should not be overloaded and contain unnecessary information.

Be consistent

Do not give your child several tasks at the same time. For example, you ask the child to put away toys, wash their hands, and then go to the table. But this will lead to the fact that the child will either not do any of your tasks, or will be distracted somewhere along the way of their implementation. Therefore, a hyperactive child needs to be told in turn what he needs to do.

Be careful about banning

The word "no" for a hyperactive child is an occasion for an explosion of emotions. Therefore, it is better not to pronounce it at all. Do not say the phrase "Don't step on the puddles." Better say: "Let's walk on dry pavement." In this way, you can avoid many tantrums.

Mark the boundaries of time

Since the kids are still very poorly oriented in time, then, having given the task, you will have to follow how it is done. If your child is playing or running around with enthusiasm and you need to feed him, put him to bed, or distract him to another activity, warn him that in 10 minutes you will need to complete this or that task.

Channel your child's energy in a positive direction

If you have a hyperactive child, it is necessary that his energy wasted during the day as much as possible. It is desirable that these be useful deeds. Take your child for a walk, let him go in for sports, visit attractions with him, buy a bicycle. You need to find what the baby likes the most. He will become more calm.

Visit a doctor

Make an appointment with a neurologist. He will accurately determine the diagnosis and prescribe the drug that can help cope with hyperactivity. In most cases, drugs help improve attention, behavior, and the ability to control oneself.

If you have a hyperactive child, you must be patient. It is important to understand that such behavior is not due to the fact that he is evil or bad, but to a violation at the level of the brain. Do not be afraid to consult a doctor. After all, this can help the baby learn better and communicate with other children. You must love your child, regardless of his behavior. After all, he deserves it no less than others. And sometimes it needs more. After all, it is also not easy for him when he has difficulties with study or communication.

How to deal with a nervous hyperactive child? — Dr. Komarovsky (video)