The reality surrounding a person is not always, so to speak, benevolent. In particular, this repents of those cases when it comes to human relationships, and, moreover, about business, because this area of life is directly related to interpersonal interaction, and more specifically, to the art of negotiation.
You are probably already familiar with some of our articles on the topic of negotiations (if not, you can also get acquainted with them), but today we decided to delve into this topic even more seriously and talk specifically about tough negotiations.
From time to time, a person, if he really wants to defend his interests, is forced to participate in tough negotiations, which differ from the usual ones in their sharpness, emotional intensity and special atmosphere. Before such negotiations, you need to be as accurate as possible, as well as understand what your opponent can use against you. In addition, it is very important, and also to adhere to that effective minimum, below which you simply cannot fall.
And, first of all, it is worth talking about what the strategy and tactics of conducting tough negotiations can be.
Tough Negotiation Strategies
In most cases, before tough negotiations, each of the parties participating in them think over their own strategy of behavior, which can be defensive or offensive.
A defensive strategy is relevant if the opposite side has an advantage in some way, for example, psychologically or professionally.
An offensive strategy, in turn, is chosen when there is a clear advantage over the opposite side. And it is this strategy that is the most striking example of tough negotiations. As a rule, the advancing party itself provokes the emergence of conflict situations during negotiations, because. through this, it is possible to ensure that the opponent loses self-control, as a result of which he can make a lot of mistakes or say something that should not be said.
As for the tactics of conducting tough negotiations, there can also be two of them.
Tough Negotiation Tactics
There are two main tactics for conducting tough negotiations - this is the “Giveaway” tactic and the “Psychological comfort” tactic.
The “giveaway” tactic consists in the fact that one of the opponents takes the point of view of the second, analyzes the current situation with and operates with such arguments that can influence this position, as well as shake his confidence in the questions and conclusions proposed and put forward by him .
The tactic "Psychological comfort" involves the use of language in the negotiation process, the meaning of which is that "We wish you only the best." This approach allows you to make the opponent more pliable and prone to making concessions due to the fact that qualities such as vanity, a sense of self-importance and significance, etc., begin to leap up in him. Also here, his greed is used against the opponent, because you can absolutely unreasonably promise him all sorts of benefits that he will receive from an agreement that suits you. A very important moment begins to operate here, when a person (or a group of people-opponents) is not able to properly assess the situation, and, without noticing it, begins to believe in the reality of his own benefit.
Among other things, there are also such psychological methods of influence in which the insufficient competence of the opposite side is used, and the opponent himself is discouraged by a huge number of various terms, names, official data, etc. In many cases, in order not to show his lack of education, he will not clarify all these incomprehensible points, and will be forced to believe in what he is told.
The most experienced communicators can even use methods of hypnotic influence, for example, techniques that introduce the interlocutor into a kind of trance state. Here, techniques such as changing the timbre of the voice, and can be used. All this can affect the mind of the opponent so much that he simply loses the ability to analyze and critically assess the situation.
It is also necessary to mention that in some cases negotiators resort to such a technique: initially they start the conversation as harshly as possible, which is why the interlocutor simply plunges into shock (this is done in order to impose their own rules of the game on the opponent). And after the desired intermediate result is achieved, they radically change their tactics, starting to show sympathy, compassion, understanding, etc. At this stage, the opponent subconsciously imbued with trust and "unfolds" in the right direction. The reason for this is that people often experience a peculiar feeling of gratitude towards those who initially held a different point of view - the opposite of them, and then began to share their point of view.
The presented method is very effective in tough negotiations: you can start them very aggressively, and then resort to showing respect for someone else's position, partial agreement with the opponent's arguments and offering the most optimal way for both sides to solve the problem. This tactic is considered to be extremely effective. the enemy becomes more pliable and compliant, seeing that he is respected, and seeks to use for himself the temporary loyalty of the initially aggressive side.
However, the productivity of tough negotiations depends not only on the ability to use the aforementioned strategies and tactics. It is very important to be able to apply a number of special techniques that regulate behavior during tough negotiations. What are these tricks?
Rules of conduct in tough negotiations
Here we can highlight the five most effective rules of conduct in tough negotiations.
First: From the very beginning of tough negotiations, you should be as open as possible and immediately clearly define your position. Thanks to this, you can achieve a similar behavior of the opponent.
Second: In the event that the negotiation format allows communication on extraneous topics, this opportunity should be used, because nothing brings people together like the presence of common interests or problems. In the process of communicating on the topic of something completely abstract, you can not only have a pleasant conversation, but also come to a solution to the issue in the best way possible.
Third: Many people are afraid to ask for help. However, such a move can easily disarm even the most aggressive opponent. Considering, there is a high probability that you will not be refused. Moreover, it does not matter what the reason will be: fear of losing one's own significance, compassion, or a subconscious desire to help. You can start with something quite banal, for example, with a request to borrow a pen or give a piece of paper.
Fourth: In no case should you allow your opponent to manipulate you or put pressure on you. Even a direct indication to the interlocutor that he begins to "go too far" is allowed. However, it is important not to forget to turn the conversation on a positive note, because the purpose of the negotiations is not mutual accusations, but the search for a solution to the problem. The opponent will not be able to manipulate you only if you constantly maintain self-control.
Fifth: Learn to refuse correctly. Even if the negotiations began to resemble a conflict and do not bode well, categorically. The most effective way to say goodbye to an opponent in such a situation is to admit that you are solely responsible for the negotiation failure. You can also point out that it is your ability to reach an understanding that does not allow, but in the future you do not mind discussing common problems again.
Of course, the topic of tough negotiations is far from being exhausted by the information that we tried to convey to you. This topic is very broad, and you can devote more than one page to the analysis of all its subtleties and nuances. But, in any case, the recommendations presented can significantly improve your negotiating skills and achieve the required results when interacting with other people.
The most destructive emotion for negotiations is anger. It occurs when your personal psychological space is violated. Imagine: a stranger is walking straight at you - closer, closer, closer ... You tense up, your body seems to be screaming: “Stop, you can’t get any closer!” Because your personal space is being violated. The same condition occurs when an aggressor or manipulator invades your personal space verbally. The body also screams: “Stop!” But we don't hear it. But in vain. Take a break and try to stop your anger. Many are afraid that a pause will be mistaken for confusion. Nothing like this. The pause just means "I have to think." Don't be afraid of her.
The most effective way to calm down is to breathe in your belly. When we are overcome with anger, blood rushes to the hands and face. Starting to breathe in the stomach, you direct the blood flow to it, "taking" from the hands and head. Remember: after dinner, when the stomach digests food intensively, you are not capable of extreme emotions. Therefore, for example, many lawyers try to make sure that trials take place after the judge's lunch.
2. Don't make excuses
During negotiations, the pendulum of emotions should not swing. It is important to learn how to manage not only your emotions, but also the emotional state of the interlocutor.
For example, an angry customer comes to you, the seller: “You delayed deliveries, compensate for the losses immediately!” An inexperienced seller will answer: “Yes, yes, it’s my fault, get a 10% discount.” But in this state, your concessions, most likely, will not satisfy the client. He will continue to push and say: "No, let's 20%!" It is better to let the person speak out and in no case make excuses. Resolve issues after the flame goes out.
You should not make excuses even in those cases when they look down on you, or even with a mockery. Suppose you come to an official. “What, have you come to ask for something? Come on, show me... What do you have there...” And you begin to make excuses - to emotionally prove the importance of “what you have there”. But it’s better to take a break and answer the official: “Do I understand correctly that it is important for you that I accurately and briefly state what I came with?” This is a rational answer. The person at the other end of the table will be attentive to what you say.
3. Set intermediate goals
Having achieved emotional stability in negotiations, start defending your goals, but not head-on. Let's say you bought equipment that doesn't work. You come to the supplier for negotiations in order to receive compensation. If you announce your goal at the very beginning, you will probably get an answer: no, I won’t. This happens because we start to fight with the opponent from the threshold. Your goal is to get compensation, his is not to pay. Found a scythe on a stone. In the end, you may end up with nothing.
Set intermediate goals. First, get the consent of the partner that he is to blame, due to his fault there was a failure. When a person admits his guilt, you can start discussing options for compensation. It is the options - the dialogue is important here, not the imperative. And at the end, fix the result - to make sure that both parties understood it the same way.
4. Make the interlocutor listen to you
Often start-up businessmen are not taken seriously. An influential "monster investor" in response to a fiery speech summarizes: "You are talking some nonsense." You are shying away, but you need to clearly respond: “What does “nonsense” mean? What exactly do you not like? Be specific, please." Move the conversation in a constructive direction.
Sometimes they don’t listen to you at all, they don’t let you say a word, accusing you of one-another-third-tenth. To get out of this situation, do not try to interrupt and object. Remember the very first (not the most offensive, but the very first) illegal argument in your direction. After that, you need to stop listening to the interlocutor. Just keep this false argument in mind. After a while, your "accuser" will be silent, and then you need to break his very first wrongful argument. In this case, the rest, as it were, did not exist, and the opponent's position weakens. If there is a second "attack", do the same. This technique does not guarantee that your point of view will be accepted. But, at least, you will be listened to and heard, and this is already a lot.
5. Stand up for your interests, not ambitions
Remember that the essence of negotiations is defending the interests of the cause, not your own ambitions. Solve the problem in essence, translate it into a rational plane.
The most common mistake in ambition negotiation is bargaining. One says: "Give me a 10% discount." Second: "No, I'm only 7% ready." First: "My position is unchanged - only 10%". Second: "Mine too: 7%, no more." Ah well! And the first one leaves, slamming the door. Both satisfied their ambitions, but did not come a step closer to a solution, did not see their benefit. We lost the deal and the money, because we were negotiating ambitions, not deeds.
6. Give the right to opt out
It often happens that the partner (negotiator) refuses to directly answer the question or feeds you with promises. This means that he most likely wants to refuse you, but is afraid to say no. Without refusing directly, the partner thinks that in this way he prolongs the relationship. In fact, the opposite is true: the opposite side has unreasonably high expectations, which in the end can lead to a complete break in relations.
Negotiation implies that each participant can say "no" at any time. Give the person the right to refuse you. The phrase will help: “It is very important for me now to hear the answer: did you accept my proposal or rejected it. I won’t be offended or upset if I get rejected, but it’s very important for me to hear a concrete answer.” After this phrase was uttered, you, firstly, equalized your positions at the negotiating table, and secondly, you made it clear to the person that he is responsible for his decisions. If the partner hesitates in making a decision, he will definitely accept it (maybe a little later) and inform you about it. If he intended to refuse, he will refuse. Either way, you will get results.
Yielding to the requests of fellow marketers (today I received another letter with a request), I will continue the topic of my own experience of tough negotiations, which I started earlier in "Negotiator (practice)". Negotiations for the salesperson and marketer are an essential part of business relationship management. Experts consider the process of negotiation to be the "edge of skill" of the manager. It is quite natural that in addition to a good knowledge of the subject of negotiations and mastering the technique of negotiating, it is necessary to be, to some extent, a psychologist and master the methodology of conducting tough (hard) negotiations.
Only by mastering the tactics of "tough negotiations" can one understand that if a partner uses rudeness, manipulation, various tricks that are "unethical" in normal communication during negotiations, this does not come from a lack of interest in the subject of negotiations and from disrespect for the partner personally.
This is a tactic, nothing more! The purpose of such tactics is to obtain benefits for oneself, and a partner who surrenders "at the mercy of the winner" is a common thing, and his personal experiences and lost profits are just an excuse and a reason to learn.
How to recognize the tactics of heavy negotiators is one of the main and perhaps the most difficult questions that marketers and salespeople regularly face. The same tactics exist for female negotiators.
- excessive demands;
- boor at the negotiations;
- overestimated own value;
- belittling the value of a partner;
- placement of false accents;
- hopeless situation;
- fuzzy final conditions.
Excessive requirements
During negotiations, the partner defends the extreme position for as long as possible:
I must say right away that we select suppliers very strictly, we have strict requirements. Even for those with whom we have been working for five years, it is extremely difficult to work with us.
Often the technique of "inflated demands" involves the declaration of such requirements, which can be easily and painlessly waived. Such demands are always put forward in the hope that if they are abandoned, the "compliant" negotiator expects similar concessions from the negotiating partner.
Terms of delivery - only on credit, the loan term is 90 banking days...
Ham in negotiations
The technique is used with a much lower social, managerial status of the negotiating partner. The task of a tactical technique is the destruction of the partner’s homemade preparations, the removal of protection and a test for stress resistance. Tactics: interrupting a partner; raising the voice; approving everything that is said; malicious and incorrect remarks about the subject, the expediency of negotiations, about the partner himself; concentration on the partner's mistakes and their discussion. Immediately after achieving this tactical goal, "Ham at the talks" is dramatically transformed and further negotiations take place in a different tone and with a different emotional coloring.And I did not ask you about my benefit, concentrate on your offer, let me determine the benefit. You better tell me why the profitability of this deal is different for you on pages 5 and 7?
Another way out of the "boorish situation" is to connect another negotiator and delegate further negotiations to a colleague (good/bad cop tactic):
Well, in general, everything is clear to me! I went. Try to convince my colleague, maybe something will work out for you?!
Such a departure frightens the opponent. The elder left, he was dissatisfied, which means that all hope is for the remaining one, but this one does not solve everything. So you need to give in, or at least you should start to worry.
Inflated eigenvalue
My favorite take!It is very simple, I will give a conditional example and you will understand that it is easily repeatable and brings dividends in negotiations:
When buying a refrigerator in a regular store, I always ask about the price of 10 pieces: "well, this is the first one, next month we need nine more." Even if I don’t get a lower price, I will immediately rise in the eyes of my negotiating colleague, I will get a different attitude and attention to myself. However, I often get a discount on a refrigerator too.
The reception allows you to reveal the capabilities of a partner, his interest not only in you and your offer, but in the level of competence and practice of working out high-level (large, demanding) clients. The tactical technique works when the negotiating partner is lower in status than you and when you absolutely own the "legend", acting skills and practice, but remember that modern methods for assessing the potential of a partner will allow you to "clean water" such a "promise to buy a lot at once".
Belittling the value of a partner
There is still a subspecies of this tactic: the threat of disruption of negotiations due to the somethingness of the partner's proposal.
I know where I can easily take it cheaper, if you give me a price of 900 rubles per linear meter, I will work with you.
I asked my managers here, they know you on the market and you sell only because of the promotion of your site (brand). Your price is the same as everyone else, but the quality is worse. In the future, only work with smaller clients or discounts will save you...
The technique is not used to put a partner in a hopeless situation, but, like the previous one, in order to reveal the level of competence and the practice of working out high-level (large, demanding) clients.
Arrangement of false accents
This tactic consists in the fact that, for example, an extreme interest in resolving an issue is demonstrated, although in fact, this issue is secondary for this negotiator. The motives for such behavior may be different. Sometimes this is done directly for bargaining: the issue is subsequently removed in order to obtain the necessary decisions on another, more important issue. Dialog:
The price does not matter yet, tell us about the availability of your goods - this is more important!
- Well, we have in stock these very popular positions, these colors ...
- Like this?! Don't have brown?
- Unfortunately, only under the order!
- No, well, if you do not immediately have this product ... If I pay you, and I can pick up the goods later, then the price under these conditions should be cheaper ...
Taking the partner away from the price inevitably leads to peace of mind, and finding out that not all of the partner's requirements can be taken into account immediately returns the negotiations to the main issue.
Desperate situation
As a rule, a situation declared as "hopeless" is not, and this is another tactic of tough negotiations.
Understand that your intransigence will inevitably lead to a breakdown in negotiations, since the price is needed today ... it is today that I call it to my customer, and if it does not suit him, we will not have a chance to change our minds. Tomorrow will be too late!
Whether so it actually you should know before the beginning of negotiations! It is unlikely that negotiations begin from this moment (with the declaration "tomorrow will be late"). The background of the partner's appeal to you, as well as the background of the relationship with the customer, you need to know from the first, initial stage of negotiations. In negotiations - putting a partner in a hopeless situation is most likely a risk! It is clear that a conversation with the help of an ultimatum is no longer negotiations, but an attempt to solve the problem unilaterally, if ... a "home-made" has not been invented and seeing that the technique did not work, you can do this:
Okay, let me make one call, maybe we can delay the decision?!
....
Well, we still have two more days.
Fuzzy final conditions
Another tool for manipulating a partner, also called "delayed rigidity," is the vagueness of the wording of the final agreements, which include, say, "double interpretation." Reception involves the following tactics of behavior:As a result of the negotiations, the parties worked out some decisions (agreements). At the same time, one of the parties "laid" a double meaning into the wording of this agreement, which was not noticed by its partner
This is done in order, if necessary, to interpret the agreement in their own interests, allegedly not violating it, and again and again returning to the negotiations at the moment when it will be beneficial. It is clear that such behavior can carry a very great danger.
That's all for now... Let me have a couple of lines as a summary.
Philosophically, tough negotiation tactics are based on the theory "reasonable selfishness" formulated by French thinkers of the eighteenth century. The tactic of tough negotiations develops ideas of conscious, if possible, subordination of a partner to one's own personal interests, but only to the extent that "winning" from a common cause made it possible to realize these interests.One of the basic rules when negotiating with a partner who uses this kind of techniques:
- understand this tactic;
- depending on the results of the analysis, one should further build one's own line of behavior;
- to analyze, perhaps there are reasons why the partner behaves "not correctly enough";
- if the reasons are clear - the weakness of the partner’s position itself, his uncertainty, clumsiness, then, according to the theory of "reasonable egoism", it is worth using the understanding of these reasons in order to build your own negotiating tactics, to your advantage.
- What are the tough negotiation strategies
- Examples of tough negotiations
Tough negotiations differ from the usual ones in that they are carried out using prohibited techniques. Such methods are practiced, as a rule, when the transaction is one-time and you need to get the maximum benefit from it. Each step forward in such situations means the loss of one's own benefit.
How to Prepare for Tough Negotiations
- Determine your strengths and weaknesses. Try to understand how you can influence the interlocutor (for example, the prospects for cooperation with your company) and how he can put pressure on you (for example, more favorable conditions offered by your competitors).
- Designate the desired result. Set for yourself "pessimistic" and "optimistic" boundaries, beyond which it makes no sense to negotiate. Then you will be able to defend your interests and not go beyond the established limits. It is also important to know what your partner wants from these negotiations, and develop a strategy depending on this.
- Determine what you are willing to sacrifice. It is better to immediately indicate how much you are ready to “pay” for the result of negotiations to move from the “pessimistic” value of some parameter to the “optimistic” one.
CEO speaking
Mikhail Urzhumtsev, General Director of OAO Melon Fashion Group, St. Petersburg
I am not a supporter of hard methods and try to avoid conflicting partners. In no case should you leave your partner with the impression that he was “squeezed out” as much as possible. Further cooperation in such a situation is quite problematic. Negotiations should take place in a comfortable environment, and even business communication should not be devoid of a touch of humor.
Of course, there were situations when we firmly defended our positions. For example, quite recently I had to use a non-standard method of persuasion, but it can be described more as a conversation between a man and a man. In addition, our side has attracted another level of negotiators - people holding higher administrative positions.
The first stage of negotiations should include managers who are able to make decisions on their own and get out of unusual situations correctly. Communication at the level of directors or owners is already the last stage, since there is less room for maneuver.
Tough Negotiation Strategies
There are two strategies for conducting tough negotiations - defensive (defensive) and attacking.
Protective strategy. It should be used if you assume that the opponent is stronger than you professionally, emotionally and mentally. In this case, it is necessary to strictly fix those parameters below which it is impossible to fall. Ideally, the person who enters into such negotiations should not have the authority to make the final decision. For example, you are negotiating, and the contract itself is signed and endorsed by people who were not present at the negotiations, for example, members of the board of directors.
Usually, negotiations with the authorities follow this scheme. A businessman who decides mainly commercial rather than political issues is a weaker negotiator compared to a politician.
Attack strategy. It is better to use it if you are counting on winning. It is better to send a person to such negotiations who will be able to quickly navigate and make the right decision. For an attacking strategy, conflict is often beneficial: during a conflict, a person loses control over himself and becomes easily controlled. In a state of passion, the negotiator is able to make mistakes, which you can then use to your advantage.
An example of such tough negotiations is public debate, when it is extremely beneficial for the opposing side to lose control of itself. Literally a couple of phrases - and your opponent starts screaming, spitting, slurring his own thoughts, saying too much, and this makes a negative impression on the audience. As a result, you, calm and reasonable, find yourself in a more advantageous position.
It will help you become an expert in negotiation.
How to deal with tough negotiations
Daria Ageeva, practicing psychologist, Master of the Faculty of Psychology, St. Petersburg State University
1. If the partner shouts or bursts into a furious speech in response to your proposals, then it is better to stop the negotiations or listen in silence (deep slow breaths and exhalations help to keep calm). When the partner stops screaming, say that you think this behavior is not constructive, and offer to focus on a specific problem. You can also politely say, “Sorry, we had a misunderstanding here.” If you can’t pause (due to time limits), go back. Re-state the main provisions in the thesis form. This will slow down the pace of negotiations.
2. If you receive a lot of information and do not have time to think it over, or they try to overload you with it, you need to slow down. Keeping records helps. In addition, if you did not take notes and suddenly start taking notes (with the words: “This is really curious, let me write it down!”), The person begins to think that he said something superfluous and slows down the pace of the conversation.
3. If you feel that they are openly trying to manipulate you, switch roles. Counter with the phrase: “Good idea, what do you think about it? Personally, I'm not entirely sure."
4. When faced with an indisputable fact, use an emotional response. An expression like “I don’t like this” or “This offer doesn’t make me very happy” is often stronger than good arguments.
5. If you are insulted, you can, in order to remain calm, switch from auditory to visual sensations - begin to carefully examine any object. You can play the situation in your imagination and present your partner in a funny way (for example, reduce the height of the person who caused the anger, presenting him as a bug).
6. If you feel that your emotions are on the edge, try to become aware of what emotions you are experiencing. Name them: I'm scared, I feel guilty, I'm irritated. Next, trace where tension arises in the body, and try to relax, stretch this place. Transfer the focus of attention from emotions, thoughts to physical sensations - pull the soles of your feet towards you so that tension appears in the calves, then slowly relax. A great way to relax is deliberately slow motion. Slowly take a bottle of water, slowly pour water into a glass, drink in small sips while looking at the bubbles.
How to Smooth Out Tough Negotiations
Tough negotiations can and even need to be translated into soft ones, especially in cases where you are aimed at long-term cooperation. Use the following methods:
Be open to the interlocutor. To translate tough negotiations into soft ones, you must first of all be flexible and open yourself. Clearly state your position: perhaps this will make your interlocutor go the same way (see. Seller and Buyer).
Talk about neutral topics. At the beginning of tense negotiations, it is sometimes useful to touch on topics that are not related to the conversation, but are interesting for the interlocutors, for example, hobbies (see. Tactics "become your own").If you are meeting for the first time, you can tell a little about yourself and your company. Naturally, you will achieve a greater effect if you do not turn the conversation into an official presentation.
Examples of tough negotiations in practice
Hayk Lazaryan, General Director of VIP Cruise, Moscow
Example #1. Once we had important negotiations with a German cruise company, the purpose of which was to conclude a very lucrative contract, giving the exclusive right to sell cruises of this company on the Russian market. Naturally, the Germans considered several more similar proposals.
The German partners who arrived impressed us with their unfriendly appearance and closeness. First, we laid a chic table in our office. After lunch, negotiations began, which were very difficult, and at some point we had to take a break.
After the coffee break, the tense tone of the German side softened a bit. But two hours later, when the main issues were discussed, the Germans made it clear that they were hungry again. Then I decided to take the guests to a good restaurant. But the discussion of possible cooperation that continued in the restaurant was not easy. The partners offered unacceptable conditions, did not listen to our arguments at all and did not want to make any concessions. There was no compromise. At some point, it began to seem to me that the Germans were hesitating and were not yet inclined to make a final decision in our favor. Then I wanted to hit them with something. Estimating that our competitors, most likely, took them to restaurants and Russian cuisine with nesting dolls will not surprise them, I suggested that the guests go to the Russian bath. Naturally, they agreed. We rented VIP apartments, which had everything: a steam room, relaxation rooms, and our own bar. The Germans rested from seven in the evening until half past four in the morning. As a result, the costs paid off: we won the tender and signed a contract on favorable terms for us. So sometimes in a situation of tough negotiations one should find non-standard solutions: the method of switching attention works flawlessly.
Example #2. It happens that people call and express their claims to me personally. Such negotiations cannot be called soft, and my task, as a leader who is interested in his clients, is to relieve tension and transfer negotiations to a peaceful course.
I make it clear to the person that I hear him, I delve into his problems. This is achieved by an elementary repetition technique. For example, he says: “You didn’t deliver the goods to us!”. I support: “Understood. We didn't deliver the goods to you." Claims continue: "Even in the delivery was a marriage." I answer: “Clearly. Also a marriage in delivery. And I even ask the client to speak more slowly, as I really write down the details of the claim. If a person understands that his dissatisfaction is taken into account, he will not aggressively demonstrate his "fi". The result is a useful, constructive conversation for both parties.
You can successfully repel an attack by asking: “Introduce yourself, please. What is the name of your legal entity? The more details you specify, the closer you will be to a conflict-free conversation. You asked a question, you answered it - this is already a constructive interaction. If there are professionals on both sides, any deal turns into soft negotiations.
Example #3. If the situation is heating up, then any abrupt action will help, a blow to the table, loudly said “Enough!”, An unexpected comparison. Incorrect questions should be answered openly and symmetrical questions should be asked as soon as possible. For example, in the framework of cooperation negotiations, you are asked: “Do you want to cash in on us?”. The answer should be: “Yes, we want to make money. You are not?".
If you are forced to do something, say loudly: “You are putting pressure on me!”. Once this is said, the possibilities of manipulation by your interlocutor are greatly reduced. Then you can turn the conversation into a peaceful direction (if you are planning a long-term cooperation) or even launch an offensive.
During tough negotiations, it is important to learn how to control your condition. Try to look at yourself from the outside, evaluate your actions. This approach will help to timely determine the line beyond which you can become a puppet in someone's hands. You should be concerned if your gestures have changed, you have begun to perform strange actions: tapping on the table, unreasonably rubbing your hands or feet. So, stroking the thighs with both hands is a subconscious gesture that means that you want to leave the place of negotiations. If you notice this, it means that the subconscious mind is signaling you about the danger. In this case, it is best to go out for a while, calm down and decide whether you want to continue negotiations or not. It is very useful to wash your face: the impact of water on the forehead triggers reflex mechanisms that calm the heartbeat and regulate metabolism. In three to five minutes, you can regain your balance and decide whether you need to continue the conversation. If not, say that, unfortunately, an urgent call has come in and you are forced to leave the negotiations. If you think that it is necessary to bring the matter to the end, calm down, gather your strength and go for the next "portion".
What questions will you find answered in this article?
- How to prepare for tough negotiations?
- What negotiation strategy to choose?
- What is the essence of the tactics of "talking" and "attaching"?
- How not to let yourself be manipulated?Brief summary of the article
- How to Prepare for Tough Negotiations
- Determine your strengths and weaknesses.
- Designate the desired result.
- Determine what you are willing to sacrifice.
- Protective strategy. It should be used if you assume that the opponent is stronger than you professionally, emotionally and mentally. Ideally, the person who enters into such negotiations should not have the authority to make the final decision.
- Attack strategy. It is better to use it if you are supposed to win. It is better to send a person to such negotiations who will be able to quickly navigate and make the right decision.
- Tough Negotiation Tactics
- Attachment technique. First, you accept the point of view of the interlocutor, and then look at the situation or question from his side. And then the arguments that you will use can push the interlocutor to change his mind.
- The technique of "chattering", when the phrases are repeatedly repeated: “I wish you well!”, “Of course, we want your company to be prosperous!”. Thus, they try to put pressure on some base human instincts - for example, greed or vanity.
- Be open to the interlocutor. Clearly indicate your position to your partner: perhaps this will make your interlocutor go the same way.
- Talk about neutral topics. At the beginning of tense negotiations, it is sometimes helpful to broach topics that are not relevant to the conversation, such as hobbies.
- Ask for help. People appreciate more those whom they helped themselves. It would be appropriate to ask for something before starting negotiations, for example, a pen and paper.
- Don't let yourself be pressured. If you are being pressured, say out loud: “You are pushing me!” From the very fact that it is spoken aloud, the possibilities of manipulation by your interlocutor will be greatly reduced.
Tough negotiations differ from ordinary ones in that they are conducted using forbidden techniques. Such methods are practiced, as a rule, when the transaction is one-time and you need to get the maximum benefit from it. Each step forward in such situations means the loss of one's own benefit.
How to Prepare for Tough Negotiations
1. Identify your strengths and weaknesses. Try to understand how you can influence the interlocutor (for example, the prospects for cooperation with your company) and how he can put pressure on you (for example, more favorable conditions offered by your competitors).
2. Designate the desired result. Set for yourself "pessimistic" and "optimistic" boundaries, beyond which it makes no sense to negotiate. Then you will be able to defend your interests and not go beyond the established limits. It is also important to know what your partner wants from these negotiations, and develop a strategy depending on this.
3. Determine what you are willing to sacrifice. It is better to immediately indicate how much you are willing to “pay” for the result of negotiations to move from the “pessimistic” value of some parameter to the “optimistic” one.
Tough Negotiation Strategies
There are two strategies for conducting tough negotiations - defensive (defensive) and attacking.
Protective strategy. It should be used if you assume that the opponent is stronger than you professionally, emotionally and mentally. In this case, it is necessary to strictly fix those parameters below which it is impossible to fall. Ideally, the person who enters into such negotiations should not have the authority to make the final decision. For example, you are negotiating, and the contract itself is signed and endorsed by people who were not present at the negotiations, for example, members of the board of directors.
Usually, negotiations with the authorities follow this scheme. A businessman who decides mainly commercial rather than political issues is a weaker negotiator compared to a politician. Attack strategy. It is better to use it if you are counting on winning. It is better to send a person to such negotiations who will be able to quickly navigate and make the right decision. For an attacking strategy, conflict is often beneficial: during a conflict, a person loses control over himself and becomes easily controlled. In a state of passion, the negotiator is able to make mistakes, which you can then use to your advantage.
An example of such tough negotiations is public debate, when it is extremely beneficial for the opposing side to lose control of itself. Literally a couple of phrases - and your opponent starts screaming, spitting, slurring his own thoughts, saying too much, and this makes a negative impression on the audience. As a result, you, calm and reasonable, find yourself in a more advantageous position.
Negotiation Tactics
The simplest are “mirroring” and “pushing through”1. However, today they no longer give the desired effect, as they are too well known. I do not recommend using them as the main ones. If you need to convince a person, you can use the standard "attachment" technique. First, you accept the point of view of the interlocutor, and then look at the situation or question from his side. And then those arguments that you will use will be able to make the interlocutor change his mind. Another standard procedure is the “talking” technique, when the words are repeatedly repeated: “I wish you well; we, of course, want your company to be prosperous!”. Thus, you can put pressure on some base human instincts - for example, greed or vanity. If he is greedy, he is promised big profits, and unfounded, since a greedy person cannot critically evaluate such information. A person who is poorly educated, but who respects science, is “loaded” with graphs, diagrams, and the scientific nature of the text. Special terms are also used. A person will most likely be embarrassed to clarify their meaning, therefore, he will not understand everything that is said and will have to rely on the opinion of the interlocutor (see also: Types of psychological traps).
How not to be manipulated
The simplest way to avoid defeat is not to enter into such negotiations. If you feel uncomfortable and feel that you can not cope, it is best to break off the negotiations and leave.
If the situation is heating up, then any abrupt action will help, a blow to the table, loudly said “Enough!”, An unexpected comparison. Incorrect questions should be answered openly and symmetrical questions should be asked as soon as possible. For example, in the framework of cooperation negotiations, you are asked: “Do you want to cash in on us?”. The answer should be: “Yes, we want to make money. You are not?". If you are forced to do something, say loudly: “You are putting pressure on me!”. Once this is said, the possibilities of manipulation by your interlocutor are greatly reduced. Then you can turn the conversation into a peaceful direction (if you are planning a long-term cooperation) or even launch an offensive.
During tough negotiations, it is important to learn how to control your condition. Try to look at yourself from the outside, evaluate your actions. This approach will help to timely determine the line beyond which you can become a puppet in someone's hands. You should be concerned if your gestures have changed, you have begun to perform strange actions: tapping on the table, unreasonably rubbing your hands or feet. So, stroking your thighs with both hands is a subconscious gesture that you want to leave the place of negotiations. If you notice this, it means that the subconscious mind is signaling you about the danger. In this case, it is best to go out for a while, calm down and decide whether you want to continue negotiations or not. It is very useful to wash your face: the impact of water on the forehead triggers reflex mechanisms that calm the heartbeat and regulate metabolism. In three to five minutes, you can regain your balance and decide whether you need to continue the conversation. If not, say that, unfortunately, an urgent call has come in and you are forced to leave the negotiations. If you think that it is necessary to bring the matter to the end, calm down, gather your strength and go for the next "portion".
If you are forced to make a decision based on some facts, you need to write everything down and take a timeout to make a decision. Remember that any facts should be given with reference to the original source. If the opposing party is unable to identify the original sources, as is usually the case, state that a decision will be made only when you receive them. Ideally, all information received should be checked by your security department (see an example from my experience: How it works in practice).
Types of psychological traps
There is a pretty powerful psychological trap associated with the hypnosis technique. For example, you can switch the lighting in the room. In negotiations, of course, this technique is of little use. Although with the help of a sparkling pen with a gold cap, if it is rotated correctly in the hands, it is possible to put a person into a state close to a trance, thereby turning off the logical component of his brain.
You can also change the volume of the voice, play with the timbre and pitch. Professional negotiators are able to easily switch from high to low tone and vice versa. And they do it randomly, thereby driving the interlocutor into a trance, chatting him up. It may seem that the partner is talking about the case, and consciousness is losing the ability to analyze. Then the person himself does not understand how he agreed with all the arguments and signed the agreement.
How to Smooth Out Tough Negotiations
Tough negotiations can and even need to be translated into soft ones, especially in cases where you are aimed at long-term cooperation. Use the following methods:
Be open to the interlocutor. To translate tough negotiations into soft ones, you must first of all be flexible and open yourself. Clearly indicate your position: perhaps this will make your interlocutor go the same way (see Seller and buyer). Talk about neutral topics. At the beginning of tense negotiations, it is sometimes useful to touch on topics that are not relevant to the conversation, but are interesting for the interlocutors, such as hobbies (see "Become Your Own Tactic"). If you are meeting for the first time, you can tell a little about yourself and your company. Naturally, you will achieve a greater effect if you do not turn the conversation into an official presentation. Ask for help. It is very useful to ask a partner for some kind of service. People appreciate more those they helped. It is quite appropriate to ask for something (for example, a pen and paper) before starting negotiations.
How to say no. If, as a result of negotiations, you still have to say “no”, do not get personal. Having informed the interlocutor: “We do not sign agreements with such slow-witted people,” you will most likely find an enemy for life. You should not name the position of the partner as the reason for the failed transaction, it is better to state that it is your conditions and opportunities that do not allow you to agree at the moment.
Seller and Buyer
A fairly standard case of tough negotiations is negotiations between a seller and a buyer. The position of both parties is clear: the buyer wants to buy goods at a low price and pay for it later, the seller wants to sell at a higher price and receive money in advance. If you prepare in advance for such negotiations and deploy them correctly, you can easily turn them into soft ones, while defending your interests. Two factors must be taken into account: the price of the goods and the deferred payment. You designate in advance the minimum price to which you are ready to drop with a minimum delay, and openly inform your partner about this. Thus, you give the second party the opportunity to choose - to take the goods at the lowest price, but pay immediately, or later, but at a higher price. As a result, the partner finds himself in a situation where tough negotiations are meaningless. There is a minimum price, below which you still will not go down, therefore, only bargaining for a delay remains.
Tactics "become your own"
Show your interlocutor that you are similar in many ways: you have children, a dog, both of you are men (or women). It is quite possible that you will find common acquaintances, it turns out that you graduated from the same educational institution, etc. For example, I use such a technique as talking about children. If you are late even for a minute, you can apologize and say that you were talking on the phone with a child, and at the same time ask if your interlocutor has children.
