BAD FEELINGS In the life of a woman familiar with the archetype of Hecate, there are usually so many difficult events that it is easy for her to fall into suspicion, suspiciousness, succumb to fears about the future, bad forebodings. In her imagination can be drawn

The differences in the mentality of representatives of different nations are so striking that some things that are familiar in one country can be perceived in another as wild and blatant rudeness. Russians also have many habits that are considered “rude” at home, but in far abroad countries they will be regarded as good form.

Slurp at the table

Since childhood, Russian mothers have struggled with the childish desire to slurp at dinner and teach their kids that this is terribly uncivilized. Intelligent person in Russia, he would never slurp and smack his lips in society. This can discourage the appetite of overly squeamish companions.

But if a guest does not champ at the table in Japan, Taiwan or China, then it is not tasty for him, and this is rude to the owners of the house. Even if you are sitting in the most luxurious Japanese restaurant, slurping and noisily drinking drinks is a must! The chef will be satisfied because he managed to please the guests.

Don't pay in a restaurant for a lady

All Russian young ladies have long been accustomed to the fact that lunch in a restaurant is always paid for by a gentleman. Even if the lady herself has a 2 times higher income than the guy, she will leave him the right to pay. This delicate moment, as it were, demonstrates the “chivalry” of a gentleman and is mandatory only in Russia.

If the man did not even offer to pay for the lady, she will regard this as a manifestation of extreme greed and most likely will not give him a second chance. But abroad, the girl’s categorical offer to pay the entire bill can be regarded by the girl as an encroachment on her rights, extreme disrespect and an attempt to “buy” intimacy.

Don't eat everything away

Russian people always come to visit hungry and treat themselves plentifully, praising the cooking art of the hostess. The latter will be very happy and proud of herself if the guests eat everything offered and leave satisfied. Russian hospitality has reverse side: in Russia it is considered impolite and rude to leave food half-eaten on your plate.

But in Asian countries, this is the only way to do it. The guest's empty plate is a hint that the treat was insufficient and the person was left hungry. The hospitable hostess will immediately rush to impose a second, and then a third portion, until the guest is finally satisfied. So that this does not continue indefinitely, you should leave a little of the food offered on your plate. So the owners will understand that you are full and happy with everything.

Being late for meetings

In Russia, as in many European countries It is considered indecent to be late for business meetings. Partners may interpret this as gross disrespect and even neglect. In India, no one will even pay attention to being late for 10-15 minutes or even half an hour. In this country, people live in a different rhythm, and therefore they are somewhat philosophical about time.

Don't stop by to visit friends

Hospitality is highly valued in Russia. You can come to your bosom friend almost at any time. If you were shy or for some other reason passed by your friend's house and didn't look "at the light", the person may be offended.

In European countries, to come without an invitation is utter rudeness. Even a meeting with their parents, people plan a few weeks in advance, calling them up and asking permission to visit. Be sure to clarify the convenient time of the visit (suddenly the parents want to devote this day to their business). And this is only part of the existing differences. When planning to travel to another country, always find out in advance the traditions existing in it, so as not to get into an awkward situation.

An educated person lives in harmony with himself and those around him. It is impossible to become well-mannered all at once, or only in some cases, good manners are not a suit or dress that is kept in the closet until the big occasion. You either have education or you don't.

What is good manners?

A person is judged not by clothes, but by manners, by how he behaves in society, how he treats others, how he talks and gesticulates. Generally speaking, good manners are the presence or, conversely, the lack of respect for people. old saying“Treat people the way you want to be treated” will probably never get old. You can not read treatises on the ability to behave in society, but simply act in accordance with this proverb, and you will be considered very pleasant and well-mannered person having refined manners.

Why are good manners important?

Have good manners also very useful. We have to communicate with many people every day - at work, in transport, with friends, and its result depends on how friendly this communication will be. Without observing at least elementary rules of decency, it is difficult to adapt to a new society. It can be seen that successful and self-confident people are almost always well-mannered. About people who have achieved their goals, earned recognition, and, at the same time, are calm and restrained, they often say: "He has aristocratic manners, it is pleasant to communicate with him."

Good manners in today's society

You can often hear - in modern society not up to manners. However, a person who speaks loudly, is dressed dirty or yawns at all times, except for rejection, does not cause anything. Another thing is that some manners have changed, but not lost. Modern manners are based on respect for the other person, but convenience and practicality come to the fore. For example

1. Let the woman go forward, open the door in front of her. Now the door is opened by the one who is more comfortable, regardless of whether you are a man or a woman. If a man with a child is in front of the girl, naturally, she will open the door for him.
2. Men must give way to women. Just as in the first case, the one who is easier stands, and the woman may well give way to a disabled man.

Rules for good manners

What should be done and how to behave in order not to be considered ignorant? The basic rules of etiquette and good manners are simple: be reserved, benevolent, in control, and behave naturally.

1. There is no need to hide from everyone that you are seeing or trying something for the first time. It would be better if you were taught how to do it than to be publicly embarrassed.
2. It is very important to look good, and this is not about clothes. It is unacceptable to sit with your legs wide apart, or putting the ankle of one foot on the knee of the other, shouting loudly and gesticulating widely.
3. Do not chew gum while talking and do not look at your watch or cell phone.
4. Do not come to visit without warning, if you find people in pajamas in an uncleaned room, you will feel inconvenience.
5. Be sure to knock on the room before entering, and it doesn't matter if it's the boss's office or the child's nursery.
6. Naturally, one cannot read other people's letters, but in modern conditions SMS, emails.
7. No need to talk with a full mouth and, moreover, wipe your mouth with your hands - use a napkin.
8. Good manners for a girl is never to put her bag on her lap or on the table. A small clutch is allowed, but a fashionable tote bag is only on the floor or can be hung on the back of a chair.

How to deal with manners?

The main sign of bad manners is to point out to other people their bad manners. It is better to take a closer look at yourself, you can probably find a couple of bad manners.

1. If you are irritable, flare up over trifles and can be rude in the heat of the moment, try to control yourself. Practice breathing deeper at home, counting during an attack of irritation, use what works best, and gradually it will become a habit.
2. Bad manners can be caused by ignorance, especially if you are in another country. Ask, or better yet, find out in advance how to behave, what are the customs in this area.
3. If you are inattentive to people, or simply do not notice the need for help - ask, thereby you will be known considerate person and gradually get used to showing concern for others.
4. Write down all your bad habits, manners, ask someone you trust what annoys you, analyze what situations provoke them. At first, you can ask loved one gently draw your attention to the manifestation of bad manners, later you will see them for yourself and can control them.

How to learn good manners?

Can good manners be learned? How can a woman learn good manners so that a situation does not arise: she seemed beautiful and spiritual until she spoke? The rules of behavior are brought up in childhood, but this does not mean that an adult cannot master them.

1. First of all, learn to be calm. A calm reaction to stimuli contributes to the development of self-control, and self-control will not allow you to flare up and commit an act that you may later regret.
2. Nurture in yourself positive perception the surrounding world. A well-mannered person is not one who refrains from answering if he is pushed, but one who is not offended by a push at all.
3. Try not to provoke situations in which a feeling of embarrassment may arise, and if such a situation arose through no fault of your own, make a distraction.
4. Remember what annoys you in other people and try not to repeat it.
5. Be polite in all situations, politeness is the basis of good manners, do not allow rude expressions, disregard for people.
6. Carefully observe those who seem to you a well-mannered person and try to repeat their actions in different situations.
7. Watch your speech - do not allow jargon or special terms not to mention outright vulgarism. Secret correct speech easy - read on! especially Russian classic literature, the more you read, the faster your speech will improve, and enough has been written about good manners in books.

Films about good manners

There are films to study proper manners behaviors:

1. "How to Become a Princess" Is it possible to change manners and remain yourself.
2. "Pride and Prejudice"- how to successfully marry without a dowry, but with impeccable manners.
3. "Kate and Leo"- sophistication and slowness of the 19th century and crazy New York of the 20th.
4. "Miss Congeniality"- Policewoman and good upbringing incompatible?
5. "The Devil Wears Prada"- what lies behind the good manners of a successful lady?
6. "My Fair Lady" how to turn into society lady from the ugly duckling.