What to do to make a person more responsible. Psychology

The personality psychology of a person who is successful, self-confident and satisfied with life implies a wide area of ​​responsibility. It is thanks to the fact that people themselves make decisions, build relationships, make choices, make mistakes and correct them, they manage to achieve a lot in their personal and professional fields. Such people are called strong personalities, they are consulted, they are authoritative, responsible people.

How to understand that a person is not formed responsibility? The psychology of the individual in this case will be distinguished by the desire not to solve problems, but to avoid them, blame other people for failures, pretend that nothing is happening, wait for the problem to be solved by itself, or someone will help to do it. Irresponsibility is accompanied by a habit of making promises and immediately forgetting about them, a discrepancy in words and deeds, and attempts to shift it onto other people.

Literally, this concept can be translated as “not giving an answer” to everything that happens in life. Considering that everyone lives their own life, then a person must also be responsible for everything that happens in it, and not blame other people, circumstances, friends, parents, country for the failures.

Being responsible means understanding your desires, thoughts and actions, setting goals and taking steps to achieve them, seeing what certain actions lead to, learning from mistakes, and drawing conclusions. Human psychology is so arranged that he is able to distinguish his responsibility from the responsibility of other people or circumstances. This means understanding that sometimes there is no way to influence the course of events and change plans. In this case, it is important not to be disappointed and not to give up, but to think about how you can correct the situation within the framework of your responsibility. You can learn how to form this feeling and make it firmly entrenched in character traits by reading this article.

People who are in a relationship can make promises to each other. When a person promises something, it means that he had motives to do it. No one forces people to promise and not to fulfill - they do it themselves. In the eyes of the people around them, not doing them makes a person irresponsible. We are talking about those words that were spoken and almost immediately forgotten.

If you want to develop a sense of responsibility, you need to give up the habit of making promises that may not be kept. Remember everything that was once said, but not done. What were the reasons for this? You need to start by defining the motive - why were the promises made? Was the desire to do something for another real, sincere, or was it a need to show one's competence and significance? In the first case, these promises are most often fulfilled, in the second they can be quickly forgotten. Try not to promise right away, say what you think, leave yourself time to weigh everything and make a promise when you are sure that you can keep it.

Pay attention to relationships with others

It happens that a person does not realize his personal responsibility when he is used to the fact that other people decide everything for him. This often happens if, in childhood, parents made a choice for a child and solved his problems. The habit of living like this can remain in adulthood.

Stop those who are willing to do for you what you can handle yourself. It may be relatives or colleagues who want to feel the feeling self-importance or friends who lack communication. So the responsibility for your life can pass into the hands of other people and the consequences of decisions made by someone will no longer depend on you.

In order to form the habit of doing your own things, you need, firstly, to want to do what concerns you, and secondly, to convey to the people around you that from now on you yourself make decisions, make choices and solve your problems.

If a person does not have a developed sense of responsibility, he rarely thinks about tomorrow- such is the psychology of personality. He can't predict possible problems, to contribute to the present for the benefit of the future, not ready for unexpected unpleasant surprises. In fact, he does not have an answer to what might happen to him tomorrow, does not know what to do and most often does not do anything, allowing other people to do it for him. This is how total irresponsibility develops.

To be responsible, you need to feel in control of your life. This is possible if you think clearly and understand everything that happens in it - the causes of events, relationships with others, their own role. Objective anxiety about the future and thoughts about tomorrow is planning that leads to action. If a person is responsible for them, then we can say that a sense of responsibility begins to develop in him.

Learn from your mistakes

Making mistakes is part of human psychology. Not taking responsibility is not understanding that negative experience will be repeated again and again until the strategy of behavior is changed.

If there is no habit of analyzing everything that happens, then the danger of repeating past mistakes remains. If there is no responsibility for what is happening, then erroneous thoughts arise that what happened was repeated due to someone else's fault - other people, conditions, evil fate.

To be responsible for your life, you need to remember well the negative consequences that wrong actions led to in a similar situation, in order to avoid repetition. negative experience, act differently.

The more boldly a person takes responsibility for his life on himself, the easier he takes risks, because he hopes for his strengths character, feels confident, understands the reason and purpose of actions and the responsibility that he bears for them. He is not afraid to take risks, because he has enough resources to emerge victorious, and if not, then to learn from his mistakes and move on.

Relationship Psychology: Don't Let Others "Save" You

When a person is in stressful situation, is experiencing pain or anxiety, it may seem to him that his life does not depend on him. At such moments, other people can offer moral or feasible help. Relations with them should not interfere with realizing your share of responsibility in the most hopeless situation. You can only allow others to do something for yourself if there is an urgent need for it, or if there is no way to do it yourself. In other cases - when they try to make a decision for you, make a choice, teach you how to do the right thing - you need to make it clear that this is your area of ​​​​responsibility, and only you will decide what to do.

Responsibility is the ability and willingness of an individual to invest his time, money, or part of his freedom to achieve specific purpose. In some cases, the term may also include the ability to be punished for one's actions. In such situations, responsibility implies a certain justice of the individual in how he treats himself. The person agrees that his actions deserve some reproach, and is ready to bear responsibility for them.

This term is quite ancient, it is found in many languages. Interestingly, in all cases it is associated with the ability to react or respond to something, and is also associated with a certain punishment. Initially, punishment was a quite tangible concept. For example, murder was punished by some compensation for moral and material damage.

Today sense of responsibility more associated with a person's ability to keep given word, as well as make decisions in which the individual acts not only in own interests. The concept of responsibility is much broader than the term "obligation". However, the second is an integral part of the first.

Responsibility takes place only when there is a relationship between two or more people. That is, such a thing as responsibility does not exist outside of society. At the same time when we are talking that a person responsibly does something specifically for himself, it still implies a personal quality formed in society. There is a clear direct relationship between the closeness of a person's connection with other people and the likelihood that a person will be responsible. To develop this quality, you need experience of responsible relationships and developed reflection activities. That's why given property can only be in a real person.

Responsibility, like self-criticism, is an inherent quality that should be inherent in any leader. Nevertheless, in our time, an incorrect attitude towards the concept of a leader has been formed. Everywhere and everywhere the idea is propagated that each person should strive to be ahead of or at the head of any group of people. Unfortunately, such propaganda is a trap for responsible people who lack the skills and inclinations of management. Because of this, they have to suffer and lose their health, doing a business that, in fact, is not their path. This is especially true for young men who early age earn a number of diseases, experiencing severe stress at work.

Thus, liability is social concept, and it is supported by some actions. At the same time, the measure of responsibility should be formed by each individual specifically for himself, with an eye to his capabilities.

Responsibility is a skill that can be acquired with some effort. To understand how to become more responsible, it is necessary to consider existing levels evaluation of this quality. Ask someone you know to analyze you according to the criteria below. Often, after such an assessment, many questions arise, the answers to which will be useful. Since it is not easy to become responsible right away, an external independent look will be very valuable, which will be discussed below.

Levels of personal responsibility

  • Zero liability implies that you are playing the role of a dependent. You completely disclaim any responsibility because you think that someone's concern for you is a self-evident duty. Such a person does not think about how to become more responsible because he is comfortable in his present position.
  • The first level puts you in the position of a performer. Such a person practices the principle "work is not a wolf." Usually such people do nothing until they are told to do something. If the performer is not pushed to take some action, then he will still be at the starting point.
  • The second level of responsibility implies that a person takes the position of a specialist. Such people do their work qualitatively, but at the same time they do not put their soul into it. They see their job as a way to earn money and nothing more. You should not expect any initiative from such a person. Such people are not interested in helping or suggesting something. You need to understand that a specialist can leave you at any time if he finds a more profitable occupation. Such people quite often use the phrase "I'm not paid for this", thereby limiting themselves from activities that are not included in the list of their powers.
  • The third level is occupied by the responsible employee. Even if such a person this moment does not perform its functions well enough, it seeks to develop and acquire the necessary skills. Therefore, in the future, a responsible employee will certainly become a professional in his field. The results of his work are important to him, he is quite initiative and open to the exchange of experience. Such a person treats his occupation with interest. He considers his employer's business as his own. Each employee who works with him shoulder to shoulder is perceived by him as a member of the family. A responsible employee never says, "I'm not getting paid for this." When he is entrusted with some business, he does it, and then talks with his superiors about paying for this work both for him and his colleagues.
  • The fourth level of responsibility is occupied by the local manager. Such a person is a manager who organizes the work of subordinates to achieve their goals. This person takes responsibility for himself and for others. He is not afraid to give orders and take serious decisions on the correctness of which the fates of many depend. The local leader loves work less because he has to delegate it to his wards, who make it worse than he is. However, it is more correct to entrust it to employees, and not to do it yourself. The local manager organizes the work process in the area entrusted to him.
  • The fifth level is for the director, who manages the chiefs of more than low level. This person is responsible for the business as a whole, while placing tactical decisions in the hands of his wards. It remains for him to formulate a strategy. A person of this level is able to open new directions or close existing ones. He is a professional who makes serious decisions. However, the level of his responsibility is limited solely to the salary received and the prestigious position.
  • The sixth level of responsibility is peculiar only to the business owner. It is this person who organizes the business in which he invests his money, time and soul. He is able to be responsible for the result of his actions not only with finances, but also with life. The owner is considering own business like his child, whom he raised for more than one year. He selects a director who can effectively manage his business, but at any time he can replace him with another. Interestingly, the owner of a large company rarely lights up in public. He is a kind of neck CEO, which directs the latter in the right direction. The business owner does not ask himself the question: How to become responsible person ? He is responsible by definition, since the well-being of the whole staff of employees and his own financial condition depend on him.

Do not consider the above levels as positions. They represent levels of personal development. For example, a person holding the position of director large enterprise, from the personal-psychological side, can be an ordinary specialist or performer. At the same time, his secretary psychologically may well be the owner. Often there are men who at work manifest themselves as effective leaders and houses turn into dependents or performers. It is not uncommon for women housewives to take full responsibility, choosing for themselves the role of the owner of the family. At the same time, they raise their husband as the head of the family.

Development of personal responsibility

Raising a sense of responsibility is to teach yourself to see your obligations, as well as to be able to fulfill them and pay for the consequences. Moreover, the payment can be expressed in time or in money. You must be able to pay for your own mistakes even when you don't want to.

Since it is not easy to develop responsibility right away, you can perform the following tasks to acquire this quality:

  • First of all, you need to make responsibility one of your values. You need to realize that this quality is a very important social skill that gives you a chance to noticeably improve your life. Development of personal responsibility- a process that requires only your desire. You should have a desire to cultivate this quality in yourself. Take responsibility for your family life. Then you can realize, for example, that the author of any resentment that arises in a relationship is only you.
  • You can practice developing personal responsibility by asking yourself questions about what you can do now and what options you have. It is very helpful to replace "I want" requests with questions about what needs to be done in order to get what I want.
  • You can develop responsibility by asking yourself more often: “What should I do to be fully responsible for my actions?”
  • So how to develop a sense of responsibility alone is not always easy, you can choose a mentor (partner) who will encourage and fine you if necessary. It is better to select a person who can adequately assess your development and control your life. A partner will motivate you to follow a certain labor discipline without postponing any tasks for later.
  • It will not be superfluous to send reports on your development to your partner remotely at regular intervals. It is enough to do this 2 times a week. You can come up with penalties for non-compliance with deadlines and methods of rewarding for a responsible approach to this issue. By doing this for twenty-one days, you will be able to develop in yourself to some extent good habit.

Now you know what it means to be a responsible person. With effort, you will soon notice certain changes in your life. The development of personal responsibility according to the above scenario will allow us to see good results in the near future.

Responsibility is important quality especially for an adult. But not everyone has it, even when they reach the age of majority. If a person does not feel responsibilities to anyone, this can change in the worst side his life. Reader, let's try to understand how become responsible?

Every morning it is necessary to say to yourself that only a person is responsible for himself and his life. This must be repeated several times in a row so that this phrase is firmly entrenched in the mind. Yes, it may be self-hypnosis, but it has only one benefit. It doesn’t matter what happens to a person in a day, the main thing is to follow this phrase and love your thoughts.

Also, help your loved ones. if you have younger brother or sister, godson, help parents pick them up from kindergarten, sit with him, play, take a walk. And such go to the doctor, carefully listening to all his recommendations.

Oddly enough, but it is small children that form a sense of responsibility in another person. Realizing that the little one needs the protection of an adult, a person cheers up, starting to take care of the baby. It helps a lot with accountability.

Words, words .. Remember the song of Teona Dolnikova? Indeed, we talk a lot, for a long time, but only a small part of the conversation deserves attention. Very often people throw words to the wind. And this shows their irresponsibility.

Therefore, you should be careful about your words, take care of every letter. And most importantly, do not make vain promises that cannot be kept.

Many people find it helpful to write in a diary and notepad. It can be personal impressions and experiences. After reading them, you can analyze your mistakes. Notebooks are also important in terms of daily routine: try to plan it out. This can help you gain discipline and self-control over the situation.

And finally, to increase responsibility will help organizational work. If you are young, active, you can try to become a volunteer. They are needed by various charitable foundations. Volunteers are their voluntary assistants who help in good deeds for society.

In addition, at work, having taken a leading position, a person should feel not power over people, but responsibility to them. This is the first thing a competent and far-sighted leader should do. Otherwise, he will not gain respect from the staff.

In some cases, the love of employees for their leader saves the company from debt, from decline and other negative economic situations.

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AT recent times quite often you can hear the term "responsible person". It has become almost a requirement in job advertisements. Despite the fact that none dictionary in determining personal qualities a person does not use these words side by side, many attach to this phrase great value. What is behind it, and how to become a responsible person?

The responsibility of a person is understood as his desire and ability to give own forces, money, time to achieve a certain goal. Sometimes this also means the ability of an individual to answer for his actions. More specifically, being a responsible person means being someone who is able to make any commitments and do everything possible to ensure that they are fulfilled.

In order to earn the right to be called a responsible person, you must learn to take responsibility for all aspects of your life, such as health, obligations, relationships. Only you can force yourself to reconsider your life and change in it what you do not agree with and what does not suit you. This can only be done when you learn to take full responsibility.

Developing a sense of responsibility is difficult enough, but, as with any other character trait, it can be trained.

The first step is to make responsibility the most important of your values. You must realize that it is a social skill necessary to improve your life. For example, having learned to take responsibility for family life, you will understand that you are the cause of the disagreements and conflicts that arise in the family, which means that you also have to deal with them.

You can practice a sense of personal responsibility by asking yourself questions about what problems and difficulties you are currently experiencing and what you have done to overcome them. Answering the question about how to become responsible, we can say that best results you can achieve only when in your desires instead of the words "I want" you learn to use the question: "What can I do to achieve what I want?" or "What did I have to do to take full responsibility for my actions?"
Responsibility training is much easier if you have a helper or partner who can reward or punish you depending on your performance.

Your partner should be such that he can correctly assess your progress and control all areas of your life. It will give you additional motivation so that you do not violate the rules you have established and do not postpone the fulfillment of your obligations until later.

Relations with a partner can be remote. To do this, you can periodically send him detailed reports containing information about your progress. Such reports can be sent 2 times a week, this will be enough. More greater efficiency can be achieved if you develop a system of rewards and punishments for late or, accordingly, timely achievement of goals and reporting.

Once you learn how to do this without being reminded for 21 days, it will turn into a healthy habit that will make your life better.

Knowing about how to become responsible a person, and having put some effort into this, you will very soon begin to notice that your life and the opinion of those around you have begun to change in a positive direction.

I think that many have already heard about the law of karma, in a general sense, the law is quite simple: “What you sow, you will reap”, that is, what seeds we sow (perfect deeds), we will receive such fruits. Whatever we do in relation to others, it will return to us like a boomerang. But it is difficult for many people to accept this law in their hearts, since in this case they will have to take responsibility for their lives, read the article - how to become responsible.

Many people believe in astrology, but do not believe in. When I asked those people who believe in horoscopes what astrology is based on, in response I often heard one silence, and when I started talking about karma, they often looked at me with bewilderment. Why do people believe in the phantasmagoria that is shown on TV, but do not believe in what comes from more reliable and reliable sources.

The reason for this is unwillingness to take responsibility for one's life, it’s easier for us to say that they are all like cancers and that nothing can be done about it, that it’s as if I had nothing to do with it, just some forces act like that and that’s it. Or why there is a rejection of the law of karma and reincarnation - because this means that everything that happens to me is completely fair, that it is I who is responsible for the fact that my life is exactly the way it is, that I deserved it with my actions in the past . Of course, it's easier to rely on the injustice of this world, to the fact that some are just lucky, but you are not, but thinking In a similar way we will never be able to change our lives for the better.

“In their disasters, people tend to blame fate, the gods, and everything else, but not themselves” Plato

No matter how trite it may sound, but in order to become responsible, taking responsibility for your life, you need to stop shifting responsibility to others. When we want to change the conditions of life, whom do we begin to change - our environment, and only in rare cases we look within ourselves. We are ready to push all our problems onto anyone - the government, friends, parents, husband / wife, children, but just do not admit that if anyone is to blame for what is happening, then it is ourselves. No, the philosophy of life, where the responsibility lies with us, is not liked by many.

If you ask people if they believe in God, the majority will answer that they do, then it often begs next question "Why do you live as if there is no God?". Also, when people begin to get involved in esotericism and begin to believe in the existence higher powers, many still continue to shift to others, looking for reasons outside. “Someone jinxed me, that’s why I have such a life”, or as an example with astrology has already been given, when a person refers to the fact that according to a horoscope, for example, cancer is why he is so emotional, or a person watched the movie “Secret” and decided that by starting to visualize, he would achieve everything he wanted.

There is some truth in the above, but only a fraction of the truth. We sometimes perceive many things or too cheap - that without special efforts with just one click, everything will be great, or vice versa, fatalistic - I'm a cancer and nothing can be done about it. How to become responsible for your life you need to understand that this world is not chaos, where lawlessness is happening and not a prison, where we are chained hand and foot. It really happens that thinking badly about a person can really make him feel worse, up to illness, but in this way one burns his good karma, and the other works out his bad, and this does not happen right and left.

Concentration on some goal really increases the possibility and reduces the time to achieve this goal, since, as a rule, our thoughts are chaotic and what we just do not want there. This is similar to if we took on several tasks at the same time and did not bring them to the end, or if we concentrated our efforts on one task, allowing it to be completed as much as possible. in the best way. But when we start doing visualization, concentrating too much on some dream, then we first use the existing potential, and then we begin to take energy from other areas of life.

Indeed, there is also the influence of the planets, the planets endow us with certain inclinations in character, but this is not limited to our solar sign and does not act as some kind of fatality, become responsible for your life b. It is like the influence of the collective on the individual - if we as a person are weak, then we will hardly or not be able to resist the influence from the outside - for example, in a company where everyone drinks, we will also start drinking if we have not drunk before. In general, the level of communication acts as one of the main factors in changing our lives - communication can lead us both to the very bottom and raise us to a high level.

“The law of karma is not the highest law. The highest law is freedom of choice" Alexander Khakimov

There are children who lived in prosperous families, but grew up far from being examples of moral behavior, but there are those who grew up in difficult conditions of family strife, and grew up wonderful people and family people. God shows that freedom of choice is key, although families usually leave their mark - but this is our karma, which we deserved in the past. We often find some excuses for ourselves, just not to change our life, our character, just not to take responsibility for ourselves.

But also, you don’t need to go into depression and give up, concentrating on your shortcomings and negative traits character. Who doesn't have flaws? - everyone has them, the main thing is to learn to notice their manifestations in own life, and at the same time to deal with them to focus on their strengths. We must become responsible for our lives, until we do this, continuing to shift it to others, our life will not improve, and no amount of manipulation will help us.

  • Analyze past experience your attempts, to what it led. If your relationship is only heating up and spoiling even more, this is a sure sign to stop nag others and start making efforts to change your own character.
  • Be attentive to the reaction of loved ones, learn to listen to others. It often seems to us that we are doing the right thing, but such behavior may not suit others at all, so it is sometimes advisable to ask loved ones about feedback regarding our behaviour.
  • To become responsible, try not to shift the responsibility for your life to the government, parents, etc. If you pay attention, then such excuses do not contribute to the improvement of our life, and in a critical mood, they completely lead us into an irritable and unsatisfied state. Do not fall into the role of a victim offended by fate, it is better to ask yourself what exactly you did to make your life better.
  • If you regret a missed chance, then you begin to blame yourself or vice versa, justify, and in both cases you hold on to the past, instead of learning a lesson and moving on.

“While no one can go back and start over, anyone can start from now and make the best finish.” Carl Bard

  • How to become responsible in life - learn to accept life circumstances and the people around you. When we begin to live consciously, we will be able to notice the lessons that life sends us. And it is thanks to the conscious volitional efforts we are capable. When we live unconsciously, we are like puppets, where our reactions are completely dependent on the pulling of various strings, which are external circumstances. In this case, we are not able to see the lessons of fate, bumping into the same rake again and again. No one says that it is easy, but if you take responsibility for your life, then it will definitely change for the better.