If you think about it, it's amazing how life lessons again and again stand in front of us until we finally learn them. They always manifest themselves in different ways: signs, hints, problems that we face, people we meet. But all these lessons teach the same thing, over and over again, until we finally understand what we need to understand or take the necessary action.

Letting go is one of those lessons. It gives freedom, helps to move on, to easily follow your path. Letting go seems like a silly skill, but the important thing to remember here is that the tighter we hold on to something, the more tension is created. Tension in thoughts is manifested by tension in the body and ultimately gives rise to stress, fatigue, illness. This is why letting go is so important – it gives not only freedom of choice, but also physical health.

But this skill is not born just like that, he has to learn a lot and hard for a long time. And below are the steps that can help save the much-needed light breeze in the back, so tremulously cherished freedom from attachments.

1. Find What Grounds You

For many, this role can be played by the daily morning yoga complex, or a certain order of morning activities (exercise, shower, breakfast, mental preparation for the upcoming day). Let there be something constant and unchanging in your life, something that will always help you regain peace. And it is best that it be performed in the morning - so that you can bring yourself into balance, tune in to the upcoming business.

2. Do what you love

Stop saying yes when you want to say no, and vice versa. Determine what makes your heart beat faster, what gives you the most joy. Spend as much time as possible doing what you love, if possible and if you wish - make your hobby work, let it please you not only spiritually, but also materially.

3. Reduce the influence of the ego on yourself

When you feel the influence of someone else's opinion, when you are overcome by fears, doubts, insecurity in decisions taken when you feel guilty about something, it's your ego that's causing it. That is what affects you at such moments. Therefore, it's time to get out of his control and learn to live independently of your own and other people's emotions. It is not easy, it will require long months of work on yourself, but the result will exceed all your expectations. Only in this way can you be free and gain the ability to move in any direction.

4. Love yourself no matter what

Yes, we all make mistakes, there are situations that seem to fail. But despite this, we are all absolutely amazing and amazing, each in our own way, and it is important to always remember this. And you must always love yourself too, no matter what situations you find yourself in, whether you feel like a winner or a loser. After all, if you always accept yourself as you are, you become invulnerable to the opinions of others. You become stronger.

5. Don't take anything to heart

Many moments in life can hurt us, and not always these moments are connected with us personally. And sometimes they influence us so strongly that they can radically change our lives, deviate from the previously chosen path. To prevent this from happening, learn to ignore, skip past everything unnecessary. This will make life much easier, and the road easier.

6. Learn to acknowledge all your feelings and emotions, no matter how frightening they are.

Look them straight in the face and then let go. Learning to find a state of inner peace, even when you are running out of emotions, is something that can take a lifetime. But it will allow you to always be calm and rationally look at things. Just take a deep breath and don't let yourself analyze. Accept the emotions, acknowledge them, and then move on.

7. Learn to stop

Stops are very important - they allow you to rethink the direction of movement, give you the opportunity to concentrate again, to understand whether you are going there, whether you have chosen the right goal.

8. Relax

Most people live in a state constant stress. It doesn't lead to anything good. Learn to rest in time, relax your body and free your mind. Meditation or yoga can be a great help with this.

9. Express your love

In our society, unfortunately, it is not customary to show your deep emotions to recognize the love for the world, for the people around. It makes people depressed, lonely. Be different, don't be afraid to show emotions and your love. Be happy with the realization of freedom of expression.

10. Practice patience and tolerance

Always keep the goal in front of your eyes, go to it, but remember that the path to the most important and important goal also the longest and most difficult. Be patient, enjoy the journey, and everything will be fine in the end. Believe and you will realize your every dream. Try to be more tolerant towards other people. Nobody is perfect, including you. Do not expect and you will not be disappointed, accept yourself and others with all their positive and negative sides.

Absence or initially incorrect choice life strategy or even worse - the use of "semi-strategy", "quarter-strategy" and other non-strategy, sooner or later has only one final - strong dead end, resting his forehead on which the unlucky hero asks the question “What to do? Where and how to move forward? Let's try to figure it out.

We need to move on, and .. there is a shortage

The absence of dialectical thinking, and hence adequate perception reality plays with man bad joke. Instead of perceiving everything that happens to him and in his life as a process unfolding in time and space, he sincerely believes that he lives in a static and stable reality. Obviously, there is a price to pay for such illusions about reality. And such retribution is coming. Constantly.

Living inside his illusory "cocoon" a person spends a certain amount of resources to maintain current level comfort. From a human perspective, this situation should go on forever. “Sausage for 2.20, vodka for 3 rubles, a loaf for 13 kopecks” and so on. In reality, there is no static and stability even in a cemetery. Change is always and everywhere permanent.

And over time (and in our rapidly accelerating age faster and faster) to maintain the usual level of comfort, you have to spend more and more money. more resources. At the same time, the amount of resources does not grow, because there is nowhere, “sources are not explored”, and their consumption increases. There is a deficit. The deficit is always covered by one the only way- credit. A loan is always taken at the expense of the future. And the more the deficit grows, the more you have to take loans. And the more loans you take, the more interest you pay on them.

And one fine day there comes a moment when there is nothing to pay, and former level comfort is no longer available. Opportunities cease to converge with needs and a crisis occurs. Since a person refuses to face reality until the very end, a crisis ALWAYS comes unexpectedly for him and is perceived as “the injustice of life”, “a cruel blow of fate” and so on in the same spirit.

As a result, the poor fellow is on the street. His competencies in real world no one needs nafig. Lots of loans. Prospects are not visible. But before that, everything was not bad - stable, tasty, comfortable.

When the oil runs out..

Due to the high inertia of thinking and the habit of not noticing the truth until both eyes gouged out by it leak out, the problem of increasing the rate of resource leakage is noticed when there are practically no resources left. And there remains a "broken trough".

When this happens, a person begins to fuss, tense up, look for something, try to somehow fix everything: pin it somewhere, glue it somewhere. But it's all in vain. This trend was noticed by observant people, brainwashed and formulated in the phrase, deadly in its accuracy, “It’s too late to drink Borjomi when the kidneys have fallen off.” You had to think before.

The problem is that we do not like to think. Thinking is energy intensive. The brain is biologically designed to save energy and not to think without an urgent need. Therefore, a well-fed body does not like to think - this is counterbiological. Thinking man overcomes himself, his animal nature.

Thinking for real, and not simulating, means being able to separate reality from illusions, understand the essence of what is happening, see interconnections, understand how trends unfold, assess risks, be able to formulate and resolve contradictions, find unbanal moves, and so on and so forth. It’s hard, you can’t do it right away, playfully, without straining. And there are few fans to subscribe to such masochism.

However, cunning humanity found a way out by inventing specialization and cooperation. Special people began to think for everyone else, and the rest, as necessary, turn to them for advice. Unfortunately, many applied already when the moment for a relatively easy and quick resolution of the problem was irretrievably lost. As they say, a miser pays twice, and a stupid one pays three times! Well, a sucker, respectively, all his life, because for a sucker to turn to smart people for advice is below his, sucker, dignity.

Time for tough decisions

The way out of life, and indeed any other impasse, is always the adoption of a clear and specific solution, which does not provide for "reverse". I very often come across a situation where people seem to declare in words their readiness and desire to change their lives, but in practice they are not able to do even the simplest actions and follow primitive recommendations. As a result, the game "I'll start new life from Monday". "Monday" tends to drag on for the rest of your life.

And here it is necessary to clearly understand one simple truth– when you decide to move on and need to choose a clear and clear direction you are not in the market. There is no one to bargain with here. Your life and your destiny are at stake here. And if they are really not indifferent to you (since in our world it is quite in the order of things that a person unconsciously considers himself a shit, and builds his life accordingly), then you will not hesitate and calculate the amount of how much you need to spend to get out of butts. Isn't it cheaper to continue to sit in it?

On the contrary, you will concentrate all your resources - time, effort, abilities, etc. - on how to make a breakthrough. Since a properly made breakthrough starts the process, which later begins to go by inertia, becomes self-sustaining. It's like a ride on a sled (or snowboard) on an inclined surface, the main thing is to accelerate, and then just look at the rudders, you roll further without effort. The main thing is to push off correctly.

Prevention is cheaper than cure

If your tooth has begun to crumble, then it is better to immediately run to the dentist and fill the hole than to wait for the final destruction of the tooth in order to reluctantly get all your savings out of the egg and pay for expensive treatment. And even more profitable is to monitor your teeth, brush them and periodically come for preventive examinations.

Therefore, if “the question is in which direction to move on?” suddenly pops up in your head by chance, then do not dismiss it as a boring flour, but try to thoroughly deal with it, starting, for example, with 22 Exercises to Clarify Your Calling. Simple steps and will pay off handsomely.

A PHOTO Getty Images

It's amazing how easy it is for others important decisions. They seem to intuitively understand what they want, where they are going, what career to choose, what area to live in, and even whom to marry.

And you… you can't stop at just one, all the time "changing lanes" while driving along the "road of life", constantly interested in something new. Coach Barbara Sher calls such people “scanners”: they feel best in the face of constant change, trying to try (“scan”) as much as possible, even if superficially.

It can be difficult and scary for the “Scanner” to decide what to do next.

All this is great when you are actively doing something - but what if you can’t even start?

It can be difficult and scary for the Scanner to decide what to do next. Fortunately, there are certain strategies that can help you figure out where to go and start taking action,” says British coach John Williams, author of Fuck Work, Let’s Play!, which hosts Scanner Night in London every month. Here's what he recommends.

1. Select a project

Many of us last time really immersed themselves in some kind of project at school, but meanwhile projects are very useful: they give us the opportunity to focus on one area and at the same time discover a lot of new things.

Decide on the area of ​​life in which you want to make progress

To get started, decide on the area of ​​​​life in which you want to make progress: it can be a hobby, career, sports, travel, personal life. Make a list of all the development options in this area that are attractive to you. Write everything without limiting or "censoring" yourself. Do you want to change occupation? List all the possible professions that you might be interested in - from a stockbroker to a writer or coach.

Once you've made a list, choose the one that seems most appealing so you can experiment a little first. If you can't decide at all, flip a coin. It doesn't matter what you decide, the important thing is to decide.

2. Work on a project for a month

Set aside a small amount of time - say, half an hour a day - that you will devote to your project every day.

Do practical steps that bring you closer to your goal

Do not waste it on endless thinking, reading or searching the Internet for all kinds of information. Take practical steps that bring you closer to your goal.” For example, if you are going to improve your personal life, go on dates or at least actively communicate on the Web, and not just browse the pages of potential partners on dating sites. If you decide to become a web designer, talk to people who are already doing it, try to join their company, read professional publications or take courses.

As long as your interest remains solely in your head, you will never be able to understand whether it really suits you or not. Must try in practice.

3. Don't give up on your idea too soon

This rule should be followed, making any decision. If what you started doing doesn’t work or doesn’t bring you joy, don’t quit right away. Take some time to think. Ask yourself what else you can do to make it work. Often, just by sitting and thinking, you will discover new possible ways. Scanners are especially likely to drop new activities without really trying them.

If things don't add up, ask yourself why?

If things don't add up, ask yourself why? If you're bored or don't get along with the people your project is connected to, consider if you've had similar problems in the past. It can be very helpful to see the patterns that constantly arise in your life.

For example, if you quickly get bored with what you decide to do, realize that this is a normal reaction for you at the initial stage of the journey, after passing which you can really focus on business.

A PHOTO Getty Images

4. Be flexible

If you put in the effort, you can do almost anything, but it's worth remembering that success in some areas is much more difficult and the competition is much higher there. Especially it concerns creative professions, such as writer, actor, singer, musician.

Sometimes you can get what you're really looking for by doing something a little different.

This does not mean that you need to drop everything that seems too difficult and look for something easier. But sometimes it's worth realizing that you can get what you're really looking for by doing something a little different.

For example, if you want to become a writer, think about what it is about this craft that attracts you. Do you like to play with words or maybe you want to create fantasy worlds? If the second is true, then you can realize your passion in other areas - for example, taking up the design of scenery, writing scripts computer games or working with children.

5. Remember that the decision can always be changed

Many are afraid to choose one thing and direct all their efforts there, because it seems to them that now they will always have to do this and only this, even if they don’t like it later. But once you make a decision, you can almost always back out of it over time. It's important to adjust your path as the situation evolves, but in a pinch, you can always change your choice.

about the author

John Williams- British coach and psychotherapist, author of the book "To hell with work, let's play!" ("Screw Work Break Free: How to launch your own money-making idea in 30 days", Pearson, 2016).

His website: screwworkbreakfree.com.

“Some people consider perseverance and holding onto something as signs of great strength. However, there are times when it takes a lot more will to know when to let go and then do it.”
— Ann Landers

When we let go of something or someone, it does not mean that we no longer care about them. It just comes to the realization that the only thing we can really control is ourselves, right here, right now. it required process adapting to the ever-changing realities of life - leaving the past behind to make way for the present.

Here are 50 quotes from various articles that will help you let go and start living happily.

1. As we get older and wiser, we begin to understand what we need and what we need to leave behind. Sometimes leaving is a step forward.

2. You will never achieve what you are capable of if you are too attached to things that you have to let go.

3. Sometimes there is something in our life that should not be delayed. Sometimes unwanted changes are necessary changes for our growth.

4. Growth and change can be painful sometimes, but the most painful thing in life is being out of place.

5. The hardest part of growing up is letting go of what you're used to and moving on with something new.

6. Accept what is, let go of what was, and believe in what can be.

7. Don't be afraid of change. There is a reason for everything. Deal with it. It won't be easy, but it's worth it.

9. Never let fear determine your future.

10. Fear is just a figment of your imagination. It can be difficult at times to decide to follow your heart, but you will make a huge mistake by letting your false fears stop you.

11. You can't wait forever for the perfect moment. Sometimes you need to let go of your doubts and take risks, because life is too short to wonder what could have been.

12. You are not the same person you were a year ago, last month or this week. You are constantly evolving. Nothing stands still. That is life.

13. One of the most pleasant moments in life - when you finally find the courage to let go of what you cannot change.

14. Never force things. Do whatever is required of you and let Life is going in its turn. If something has to happen, it will happen. Don't attach yourself to what you can't control.

15. When you stop expecting people and events to be perfect, you can begin to appreciate them for who they are.

16. Live simply. Love with all your heart. Be sincere. Breathe deeply. Try your best. Leave everything else for something above us.

17. Giving up and letting go are two completely different things.

19. Giving up doesn't always mean showing weakness. Sometimes it just means that you are strong and smart enough to let go and move on.

20. Stop obsessing over your stress level and remember how lucky you are. Everything could be much worse.

21. Whatever upsets you, let it go! No need to accumulate negativity. Keep calm and have a positive outlook on life. Something good is bound to happen to you.

22. Some people cannot accept the fact that you are moving forward in life, and therefore they will try to cling to your common past. Don't condone their behavior. Keep moving on.

23. No matter what you do, someone will always be unhappy. So live by your principles and make sure that you yourself do not end up disappointed.

24. Love yourself! Forgive yourself! Accept yourself! You are you, this is the beginning and the end - and no regrets.

25. You are good enough, smart enough, and strong enough. You don't need someone else's approval to know that you are priceless.

26. One of the most liberating things that life teaches us is that we don't have to love everyone, everyone doesn't have to love us, and that's absolutely fine.

27. Try not to take too seriously what other people say about you. What they think and say is a reflection of themselves, not of you.

28. If you worry too much about what other people think of you, in some way, you will always be their prisoner.

29. Sometimes we expect more from others because we ourselves would do the same for them. Keep on loving. In the end, you will find out who deserves it.

30. Not everyone is able to appreciate what you do for them. You have to understand who is really worthy of your attention and who is just trying to take advantage of you.

31. To say yes to happiness, you must learn to say no to people and things that hurt you. Be wise to avoid negativity.

32. If you allow something, it will continue. It's better to be alone than to let negative people and their judgments to influence your life.

33. If you feel that your ship is sinking, it may be time to drop everything that weighs you down. Let go of the people who make you sad and surround yourself with those who bring out the best in you.

34. Just because someone has been a part of your life for many years doesn't guarantee that there won't be a moment when you finally decide to let them go.

35. One of the most difficult tasks in life is to cut someone out of your heart.

36. You must understand that people come and go. That is life. Stop holding on to those who let you go a long time ago.

37. Sometimes we forgive others not because they deserve it. We forgive them because they need it, because we ourselves need it, and because without it we can't let go and move on.

38. The one who asks for forgiveness first is the bravest. Whoever forgives first is the strongest. The happiest moves first.

39. Do not be sad about the past, it will not return. Don't worry about the future, it hasn't arrived yet. Try to live in the present and make it beautiful.

40. Be wise enough to let go when needed and strong enough to hold on when needed.

41. Do not let small troubles overshadow your happiness. True Wealth- the ability to feel and appreciate every moment for what it brings.

42. Life is too short to spend it at war with yourself. Learn to accept and forgive. By letting go of yesterday's troubles, you are taking the first step towards happiness today.

43. Anxiety casts a big shadow on small things. In the end, you can either focus on what's tearing you apart or on something that helps you pull yourself together.

44. Old fears - down payments for problems you may never have. Release them. Today is a new beginning, take a deep breath and start again.

45. Smile even when everything seems to be falling apart. Smiling doesn't always mean you're happy. Sometimes it just means that you are strong.

46. ​​There comes a time when you stop thinking about your mistakes and move on. No regrets - only life lessons that show you the way.

47. Remember good times, be strong in hard times, love every moment, laugh more often, live honestly and be grateful for every new day

48. You can't let one bad thing ruin a bunch. good times. Don't let the silly daily dramas confuse you.

49. If you are diligent and patient, everything that you really need in life will come to you in right moment.

50. In the end, everything will fall into place. Until then, learn as much as you can, laugh as often as you can, enjoy every moment and remember that it's worth it.

Copyright website © - Lea A.N.A.

And for girls to forget, free Winx games can be suitable, which you can play online and fantasize about fairy world

P.S. My name is Alexander. This is my personal, independent project. I am very glad if you liked the article. Want to help the site? Just look below for an ad for what you've recently been looking for.

Copyright site © - This news belongs to the site, and are the intellectual property of the blog, protected by copyright law and cannot be used anywhere without an active link to the source. Read more - "About Authorship"

Are you looking for this? Perhaps this is what you could not find for so long?

Ira, well, you probably heard that at 40, life is just beginning? By the way, this statement is not without meaning, statistics honestly speak about this. What is the secret here? The fact is that a woman at 39 begins turning point and reassessment of values. Sometimes her life changes cardinally, though not always smoothly, but more often painfully and with an eye to the past, mistakes that could not have been made in her youth.

But the fact is that it is at this critical age that a person becomes a little more relaxed, is not so afraid of losing something, does not hold on to straws like a drowning man, but tries to drastically change his life. This can be facilitated by the amount of time that you have due to the loss of your job, and visiting old friends who can help, and adventurism, that is, the desire to start something that you were afraid of before.

Here, of course, it would not hurt to learn something smart from smart people, and I think you are already taking steps in this direction, that is, you are trying to turn to specialists who will help you to shed the burden of the past and give optimism for the future, and they can also teach you techniques that will significantly support your nervous system and give a fuse to start in life. Read my profile, I think you will find a lot of useful things there. And contact. By the way, a useful instructive parable in verse, which I once wrote, can shake you up and light you up with a little spark to achieve, well, not immediately happiness, but the path to it. with uv. Alexander Pidenko.

THERE WOULD NOT BE HAPPINESS

or a PARABLE OF LIFE'S SHARE. Pidenko A.N.

Lived in the arms of the desert

Among the sands, not knowing another dream.

And spent all the nights alone

Dry wood, shelter without giving your own.

And the days were hot and the nights were cold,

Loose abyss reptiles, guarded your hour.

And you did not know what fate prophesies to you,

He only knew that the Almighty hurricane would reward.

He uprooted the tree, mad along with the root,

He foamed the dunes, denoting hell.

And the poor bird, scorched by grief,

It remains only to fly where the eyes look.

Days flashed, she rushed through the winds,

And the distance attracted, giving hope a chance.

And here is a garden full of fruits, where branches are full,

The water murmurs, coolness beckons the eye.

With a smile, God looked from heavenly heights,

'Cause he sent the crazy hurricane

Thus, giving the poor thing the strength of life,

Correct share, happiness, finding among distant countries.

Why was she in such pain, poor thing?

Yes, she did not know that somewhere could be better.

And sometimes the fear of change is so great

that many are ready to live in hell and suffer so,

and even worse? And only intervention

more fear makes them change the situation.

And why didn’t God make an oasis right on the spot, but drove the poor

a bird across three seas? What did she do wrong?

But just imagine, there would be no desert, bird, hurricane -

would I write this poem? Probably not! It would be good

or bad? And so Ptitsyn's share will be estimated by many. Kotomka in the teeth

and across the wide world begging for a piece of happiness.

It turns out that the bird was not a bird at all, but a scapegoat?

And life for her was not boring. And there you look at the oasis,

at night he will remember his native dry tree and the youth that passed on it.

Good afternoon. I was interested in your answer "Ira, well, you probably heard that life is just beginning at the age of 40? By the way, this statement can not be seen..." to the question http://www.. Can I discuss this answer with you?

Discuss with an expert