Correctly question asked is 95% success. John Miller, author of The 5 Principles of Proactive Thinking, reminds us once again how useful this art can be. effective method QBQ. This method allows you to learn to ask the right questions, not to be a victim, but to gain control of the situation.
So how do you ask the right questions?
The essence of the QBQ method is to ask question after question. What does it mean? Faced with a problem or an unpleasant situation, questions from the series “Why is this happening to me?” immediately arise in the mind. and “Why do others succeed and I don’t?”. Of course, these questions are quite natural and understandable, but directed outward, and not inward, of the person asking them, indicate a lack of personal responsibility. Only by studying deeper wrong questions, can be found best options QBQ, for example: what can I do and how can I help? They focus on what we can do to make a difference. It is impossible to overestimate the return on a simple switch!
QBQ is a leadership tool for developing personal responsibility at all levels through the right questions and choice right decision at the right moment.
Simple Rules
Tools help us achieve the best results almost instantly. Companies spend millions of dollars on "tools" that offer standard motivational training common phrases and fashion pieces. And what happens after reading at trainings, meetings and seminars? Getting to work, we run into the “wall of reality”. We think: "They told interesting things at the training, but they are not suitable for our situation" - in other words, they do not practical value. Therefore, these ideas and methods can hardly be called tools.
The QBQ method is not like that. Its practicality has been proven. At the same time, it is quite simple: it is enough to learn three simple rules formulation of questions and can be applied.
1. QBQ questions begin with “what,” “how,” or “how,” not “why,” “when,” or “who.”
“Why” questions lead to complaining and trigger the victim’s thinking “Why is this happening to me?”.
“When” questions lead to procrastination: “When will they contact me?”
“Who” questions make you blame others: “Who is to blame?”.
2. QBQ questions contain the personal pronoun “I” and not “they”, “we” or “you”, because, as you know, you can only change yourself.
3. QBQs always focus on actions. Don't forget one important detail. Based on these rules, you can casually formulate the wrong questions, for example: how to avoid responsibility or what can be done right now to interfere with the entire department? Formally, they comply with the rules, but they are absolutely unconstructive!
Personal responsibility
Personal responsibility means being able to stop blaming others, complaining and procrastinating. Looking around for the culprit, lamenting the injustice done to you, postponing your contribution to indefinite time When you expect someone else to do your work for you, you forget about personal responsibility. It would seem that everyone understands this, but no one knows how to put this principle into practice. QBQ decides this problem and allows you to turn the pursuit of responsibility into real and sustainable change.
The main thing is personal responsibility, -
The fundamental principle of QBQ is this: The answers are in the questions. When we ask the right questions, we get the right answers. QBQ rules help you formulate the right questions and avoid the wrong ones. It is also important to remember that the questions concern us personally, and only us. QBQ is a self-management tool designed to reshape your own thinking.
We make countless choices every day. And what do we choose? The second thought that comes to mind. This very moment can be influenced. The ability to control your thoughts can literally turn your life around. The right choice made with the help of QBQ will completely change the situation.
Wrong questions or still right?
Wrong questions (HB) - "why?", "when?" and who?" - forced to pretend to be a victim, put off important things and actions for later and blame others for everything. Whereas the QBQ method offers a great way to learn how to turn questions into actions. Let's compare HB and method questions
The deal fell through.
NV: When will I succeed?
QBQ: How to better understand your customers?
You didn't get a promotion.
NV: Why did this happen to me?
QBQ: How can I excel in my current position?
The child has difficulties at school.
NV: Why is everything so ill-conceived in these schools?
QBQ: How can you help your child succeed?
Your subordinates do not cope with their duties.
NV: Why are they not motivated at all?
QBQ: How to improve your mentoring skills?
Someone has made a mistake.
NV: Who ruined everything?
QBQ: What can be done to solve the problem?
Think about how to learn to do right choice and ask the right questions. Consider what would happen if you gave up blaming others, victim thinking, and procrastination. Imagine how the QBQ method will change your professional and personal life.
I've always been fascinated by people who interview. How do they manage to ask these questions? Why do they succeed in getting the interlocutor to talk and bring them to the topics and understanding, which, it seemed, the hero of the interview himself did not have five minutes ago?
Like many other great arts, the art of asking questions for a long time was beyond my understanding.
There are questions that are easy to ask. "Who took my favorite pen and didn't put it back?" "Who deleted the files from the server?" "Why haven't potatoes been peeled yet?" "Where are you?" These are reactive questions. They are a direct consequence of current events. Quite different - proactive questions. Questions that seem to arise empty place- from a vacuum, they are provoked not by external events, but by internal representations, or attempts to figure something out. These are the questions special type. Questions that allow you to change everything around.
It took me a long time to come to my understanding of how to work with questions. I came across a lot of books and techniques, but somehow they did not cling. Although, I'm lying ... I was hooked by the thought from Kenichi Ohmae's book "Thinking of a Strategist" - the art of strategy lies in the ability to ask the right questions. But what does “the right questions” mean? The answer to this question remained hidden. And I came to understanding completely unexpectedly.
A few years ago, I became interested in explanatory visualization. I really wanted to learn how to better convey to others the thoughts and ideas that I had. As a result, the "Explain" application was created, and they began to turn to me with requests to help convey not my thought, but the thought of another person. And then a serious problem arose.
It turned out that a person himself is not able to express own thought short and clear, but for me his thought is someone else's, and I, too, cannot formulate it. It's not about visualization, but about being able to understand and formulate the idea so that it becomes understandable. Thus, in the technological chain of creating explanations, the stage of “diagnostics of meanings” arose.
For a long time, the “diagnosis of meanings” remained an art. I conducted it, relying solely on the breadth of my horizons. But it remained personally mine, and I wanted to make it so that all people could convey their ideas to each other.
I tried to recruit "cool experts" to teach me how to technologize the process of extracting meanings. However, it turned out that either I was dealing with a person who himself knew the art of asking questions, but could not teach him, or his questions did not help form explanations, or he got so deep into the scientific jungle that I simply could not understand the ideas, expressed in terms that a respected expert is used to, and I cease to understand whether there is any sense in what he says, or if it is a jumble of terms, the sole purpose of which is to confuse me.
Meanwhile, over time, an interesting thing happened. I suddenly realized that I had formed a coherent system, which I use as a cognitive tool. And this system has value not only as part of the process of creating explanations, but also as a tool for building a strategy, a tool for shaping marketing communications, a tool for therapy, after all! And the most surprising thing is that this system is quite simple, but, having mastered it, people switch to a completely different quality of perception of reality (as after the Morpheus pill in the movie The Matrix).
As a basic idea, I took the postulate that the basis of everything created by man is an IDEA. A wheel, a chair, a car, an airplane, cigarettes, paper, a toothpick, and so on ad infinitum, all this was not created from scratch - there was a reason for everything.
When entrepreneurship is taught, the main transformation that happens to a person is that he begins to see opportunities in problems. And in the future he finds open valences in the world, which he links into chains of causes and effects.
To implement an idea, it is not enough to have a problem. We need changes. And change takes effort. This requires motivation and resources. Being embodied, the idea launches new changes - consequences. New problems arise that require their own solutions, and so on.
In a sense, the world created by man is a world of embodied ideas - an ideal world. Thoughts materialize in the very literally. The analysis of an idea is to understand its purpose - the necessity of existence, as part of something larger. I came to understand that the words "meaning", "mission" and "purpose" are one and the same. And the opening of meaning consists of three realizations:
- awareness of the causes
- awareness of the content of changes
- awareness of the consequences
Each of these realizations has its own groups of questions.
Awareness of the reasons
One has to imagine the world before something happened. The project has not been implemented. The product has not been placed on the market. The process is not running. The regulation has not been implemented. What was there? What problems did you face? What conflicts arose? Between whom and whom? What was the level of claims? Who was satisfied with maintaining the status quo and why? Who is interested in change and why? Why maintaining the status quo is not possible? How did you try to solve the problems and why did you fail to solve them? At least two ways. What event can trigger a change?
What is the essence of the idea? What needs to be changed to remove existing contradictions? Why do we believe that contradictions will be eliminated?
From whom and what efforts will be required to implement changes? What motivates them? Is this motivation enough? Do they need it? Who will oppose change? What is being done to neutralize resistance or turn adversaries into allies?
Under what conditions can we assert the irreversibility of changes?
Awareness of the consequences
Consequences are of two kinds: opening and closing. The first create new opportunities that were not possible before implementation this project. The second close - make useless something that exists now.
These two kinds of consequences must be considered in different horizons. What will happen immediately? What will happen in the medium term? What will happen in the long run?
Three blocks of questions set the framework - they define the contours that need to be worked out. Questions arise by themselves when you begin to fill the contours with content. In the course of the interview, it is important not to be satisfied with simple answers, but to try to get to the bottom.
In my experience, people are very aware of the content of change - what needs to be done. Everything else is hidden from them. They are unaware of causes, motives, or consequences.
Questions allow you to see the whole picture - to comprehend. Often such an interview reveals internal contradictions ideas. Shows its failure and the need for further elaboration.
The practice of asking questions showed me that literally in an hour, a person who had been hatching his idea for a year undergoes significant transformations in his awareness. People get much more than just a "sales video". The idea has depth and form, thanks to which the idea becomes suitable for alienation - it can settle in the head of other people.
Remember how in the movie Inception, the idea that has become yours begins to influence you. If you want to change the world - make your idea become a common one.
This idea is very simple - it would seem, take it and apply it, but something interferes ...
It turns out that there are mechanisms in our cultural code that prevent us from asking questions. People who ask questions are perceived more negatively than positively. These are “upstarts” or “wise men” who are trying to belittle and overwhelm the “creator” who is trying to change something. Questions are asked by teachers at school, investigators, bosses, doctors. We associate the experience of answering questions more with stress than with something pleasant and useful. People subconsciously try to end the interview on both sides. To avoid the awkwardness and stress of the questions, I came up with the "alien contact" game.
The essence of the game is that the interview participants put on certain roles. "Earthling", "Alien" and "Observer".
The role of the alien is key - this is a creature from another galaxy. He knows nothing about life on Earth, so he has every moral right to ask completely stupid questions without fear of looking like a fool. Furthermore, good performance the role of an alien suggests that you need to be exactly like Blank sheet. As practice shows, the more stupid an alien is, the more useful he is.
The observer does not actively participate in the interview, but his role is no less important. He captures the answers on the concept map. He pays special attention to which questions caused difficulties in explaining, and which ones led to insights (insights). Much can escape the interview participants involved in the process. The observer does not allow it to evaporate. Also, the observer makes sure that the alien does not teach the life of an earthling, since it is so close to the unleashing of interstellar wars.
Each of the participants initially gets acquainted with the structure of the concept map, but each time the game develops according to an individual scenario. In order to be able to cover the issue as fully as possible, we play the game in three approaches. We invite different aliens and repeat from the beginning.
The effect is amazing. In 45 minutes, the earthling begins to articulate his ideas very clearly. Moreover, the same ideas can be formulated just as clearly by an observer. A miracle happens.
Mastering the technique of asking questions is life-changing. Everything around is filled with meaning. You begin to see these meanings. And when you start to see, you get the opportunity to form them.
Asking means acquiring information and expressing an assessment of the information received.
To ask means to show interest in a partner and a willingness to devote time to him. However, with your inept, intrusive, inappropriate questions, you can achieve reverse effect: instead of information, the partner will “close”, become wary, or even completely refuse to cooperate. That is why it is so important to be able to ask (put, formulate) questions correctly.
The German philosopher I. Kant wrote:
“The ability to raise reasonable questions is already an important and necessary sign of intelligence or insight. If the question itself is meaningless and requires useless answers, then, in addition to shame for the questioner, it sometimes also has the disadvantage that it prompts the imprudent listener to absurd answers and creates a funny spectacle: one (according to the expression of the ancients) milks a goat, while the other holds under him a sieve.
A well-posed question is one to which the participant business conversation will want to answer, be able to answer or over which he will want to think, and he will be interested in cooperation.
A variety of goals can be achieved by one or another statement of the question (its formulation):
* interest the interlocutor and give him the opportunity to speak, so that he himself provides the information you need;
* activate the partner and from your own monologue go to a dialogue with him, which is more effective in business communication;
* direct the process of transferring information in a direction corresponding to your plans and interests;
* intercept and hold the initiative in communication.
It takes courage to ask. After all, to ask questions to another is to discover own position to make your value system transparent to others.
It has been noticed that it is better to start a business conversation with a series of pre-prepared questions. By the very fact of the question, you show that you want to participate in communication, ensure its further flow and deepening. This convinces the interlocutor that you are showing interest in him and the desire to establish a positive relationship. It's also better to ask questions than to monologue to keep the conversation going. The art of persuasion is to lead the interlocutor to the desired conclusion, and not to impose this conclusion by the force of logic, voice or authority.
The posing of questions requires not only their careful preparation, but also the development of their system, thinking over the wording. This is a key link for obtaining information. This is where the foundation for activation is laid. business communication, his creative direction. However, it should be remembered that most people are reluctant to answer direct questions for many reasons (fear of conveying incorrect information, insufficient knowledge of the subject, business restrictions, restraint, difficulties in presentation, etc.). Therefore, you first need to interest the interlocutor, explain to him that answering your questions is in his interests.
As a rule, the purpose of the dialogue, which is always built according to the "question - answer" scheme, is to analyze a problem. For a comprehensive, systematic coverage of the situation, an appropriate set of questions is required.
There are several types of questions that are usually used in business communication: in negotiations, meetings, business meetings.
A closed question is a question that can be answered unambiguously (“yes”, “no”, name the exact date, name or number, etc.) For example: “Do you live in Moscow?” - "Not". "Do you drive?" - "Yes". What university did you graduate from and when? - "Moscow State University, in 1992".
Closed-ended questions should be precisely worded, suggesting short answers. Usually they either begin with the pronoun "You" or contain it in an interrogative construction. For example, "You claim that ...", "Would you mind if ...", "Will you deny that ...".
They are inevitable in any business conversation, but their predominance leads to the creation of a tense atmosphere, as it sharply narrows the “wiggle room” for a partner who may get the impression that he is being interrogated.
Usually they are set in order not so much to obtain information, but rather to obtain consent from the partner or confirmation of an earlier agreement: “Could we meet tomorrow?” - "Of course"; Will the shipment arrive on Thursday? - "No, on Saturday."
An open question is a question that is difficult to answer briefly, it requires some kind of explanation, mental work. Such questions begin with the words “why”, “what for”, “how”, “what are your suggestions”, “what will be your decision about”, etc., and this implies a detailed answer in a free form. Open-ended questions are asked to get additional information or find out the real motives and position of the interlocutor, they give him the opportunity to maneuver and more extensive statements.
The main characteristics of this group of questions are as follows:
* the partner is in an active state, as he must think over his answers and statements;
* the partner has the opportunity to choose, at his own discretion, what data, information and arguments to present to us;
* addressing the interlocutor with an open question contributes to the removal of barriers, brings him out of a state of isolation and restraint;
* partner (and most importantly) becomes a valid source of information, ideas and proposals for further development cooperation.
However, open-ended questions give the interlocutor the opportunity to avoid a specific answer, provide only information that is beneficial to him, and even divert the conversation to the side. Therefore, in the course of a business conversation, it is recommended to ask leading, basic, secondary and other types of questions.
Leading questions - questions formulated in such a way as to prompt the interlocutor to the expected answer from him.
Core questions are open or closed questions that are planned in advance.
Secondary, or follow-up, questions - planned or spontaneous, which are asked to clarify the answers to the main questions.
An alternative question is something in between: it is asked in the form open question, but at the same time several pre-prepared answers are offered. For example: “How did you decide to become a lawyer: did you consciously choose this specialty, follow in the footsteps of your parents, did you decide to act with a friend, or don’t you know why?”; “When do you think it would be better for us to hold the next meeting: already this week or will we postpone it to the next one?”
In order to talk to the interlocutor, you can try to use alternative questions, but it is important that none of the alternatives touch it. In order to somehow organize a conversation with an overly talkative interlocutor, it is better to use closed questions.
It is recommended to soften questions that may offend the interlocutor and formulate them in the form of an assumption. For example, instead of the question “Are you afraid of not coping?” the wording is recommended: “Maybe some circumstances prevent you from completing this work on time?”.
You should not ask a question if you already know the answer to it. It is not recommended to start the question with the words: "Why don't you ...?" or "How could you...?" A truly competent question is a request for information, not a hidden accusation. If you are unhappy with your partner's decision or actions, try to tactfully but firmly tell him about it in the form of a statement, but not in the form of a question.
Rhetorical questions do not require a direct answer and are asked in order to evoke one or another reaction from partners: to focus their attention, enlist support from the participants in a business meeting, point out unresolved issues. For example: “Can we consider what happened normal?”; “We are of the same mind on this issue?”; When will people finally learn to understand each other?
It is important to formulate rhetorical questions in such a way that they sound short, relevant and understandable to each of those present. The silence received in response to them will mean the approval of our point of view. But at the same time, one should be very careful not to slide into ordinary demagoguery and not get into an uncomfortable or even ridiculous position.
Tipping points either keep the conversation within tight limits or raise a whole new set of issues. In addition, they usually reveal vulnerabilities in a partner position. Here are examples: “How do you imagine the prospects for the development of your department?”; "What do you think: is it necessary to radically change the management system in large organizations?".
Similar questions are asked in cases where you want to switch to another problem or when you feel your partner's resistance. Such questions are fraught with danger, as they can upset the balance between the parties. The interlocutor may not be able to cope with the answer, or, conversely, his answer will be so unexpected and strong that it will weaken the position and break the plans of the questioner.
Questions for reflection force the interlocutor to carefully analyze and comment on what was said. For example: “Did I manage to convince you of the need to revise the terms of the contract, or do you think that we will cope with the situation?”; “What action can you take?”; "Did I understand your suggestion that...?"; "Do you think that...?"
The purpose of these questions is to create an atmosphere of mutual understanding, to sum up the intermediate and final results of a business conversation.
When answering a question like this:
* the interlocutor should consider the expressed opinion;
* a favorable atmosphere is created for argumentation based on a general approach to the problem;
* the interlocutor is given the opportunity to amend the stated position.
The mirror question consists in repeating, with an interrogative intonation, part of the statement uttered by the interlocutor in order to make him see his statement from the other side. This allows (without contradicting the interlocutor and without refuting his statements) to optimize the conversation, to introduce new elements into it that give the dialogue a genuine meaning and openness. This approach gives much top scores than the cycle of "why" questions that usually elicit defensive reaction, excuses, the search for imaginary reasons, a dull alternation of accusations and self-justifications and as a result lead to conflict.
Control questions help manage the attention of a partner, allow you to return to previous stages of work, and also check the understanding achieved.
It should be noted that test questions like "who, what?" are fact-oriented, and the questions “how, why?” more focused on the person, his behavior, inner world.
To the above types of questions, one should add the so-called trap questions that an opponent can ask the initiator of communication. The latter should be able not only to ask questions correctly, but also to answer them, while taking into account the goals of the opponent. In the process of communication, you should be prepared for the following types of trap questions.
Questions aimed at testing competence. The purpose of such questions is to assess the knowledge and experience of the initiator of communication. Usually the author similar question already knows the answer, but wants to check how the presenter will cope with it. If you accurately recognize given type question, you can politely ask: “Why are you asking a question to which you yourself know the answer?”.
Questions to demonstrate your knowledge. The purpose of such questions is to show off one's own competence and erudition in front of other participants in the conversation. This is one of the forms of self-affirmation, an attempt to earn the respect of a partner with a “smart” question. If the question is really related to a business meeting, then you can ask its author to answer it himself. Asking a question, your interlocutor is unlikely to expect such a request. After he finishes his answer, you can complete it.
Confusing questions aim to divert the attention of the initiator of communication to the area of interest of the questioner, which lies away from the main direction of work. These questions may be asked intentionally or unintentionally out of a desire to solve some of their own problems. The initiator of communication should not succumb to the temptation and go away from the essence of the issue. It is better to propose that the matter be considered at another time.
Provocative questions most often try to catch the interlocutor on the contradiction between what he is saying now and what he said earlier.
If it so happens that you cannot justify such a contradiction, then it is better not to try to justify yourself. By defending yourself, you convince other participants in a business meeting of the truth of a provocative remark. But even if you are right, and the inconsistency of your words has objective reasons(you can prove it), then you still should not use the opportunity to deal with the provocateur. Getting involved in a "showdown" is not the best The best way win the prestige of those present. AT best case after your victory, the opponent will drop out of work, at worst, he will look for an opportunity to take revenge later. Demonstrate that you are taller, invulnerable to such "pricks" - and earn the respect of other participants in the business meeting.
Regardless of the type and nature of the questions, one should strictly adhere to the basic principle - to answer the question only if its essence is completely clear.
So, by asking questions in the process of business communication, you can get professional information from a partner, get to know and understand him better, make relations with him more sincere and trusting, as well as find out his position, discover weak sides to give him the opportunity to sort out his delusions. In addition, with the help of questions, we maximally activate our interlocutor and give him the opportunity to assert himself, which makes it easier to solve the problem of our business meeting.
Mastering the art of asking questions is essential to success in some areas. professional activity(pedagogy, psychology, medicine, jurisprudence, etc.) By asking a few right questions, you can get the information you need and completely close the gaps in knowledge on a particular topic. The art of asking questions contributes to the creation communication links between people.
In addition, we ask questions search engines to collect necessary information. And the correct search for data on the Internet also depends on the degree of mastery of the art of asking questions, namely the ability to highlight keywords.
There are five main types of questions:
1. Actual - questions with which you can determine the level of knowledge, the degree of knowledge of the material.
Answers to such questions are defined as correct and incorrect. To ask a factual question, it is not necessary to fully master the art of asking questions, they are aimed at obtaining the following information: Who? What? Where? When? How?
Factual questions should be asked to clarify the circumstances of any situation, the answers to them help to restore the course of events.
2. Convergent - questions that do not have a clear answer, requiring reflection and reflection.
Such questions can be directed to finding out the reasons: Why? Why?
When answering convergent issues the interlocutor analyzes the situation or mastered material (read text, watched movie, etc.).
3. Divergent - questions that help to see the existence of an alternative: What happens if ...?
The art of asking these types of questions is important for managers - the right question gives an understanding of the situation and encourages employees to discuss various options problem solving.
If the answers to convergent questions explain what has already happened, then divergent ones are aimed at predicting the future. The discussion takes place in conditional mood.
4. Question-assessment - aimed at comparison, reasoning.
Answers to this type of questions show the degree of possession of information, interest in the topic of conversation, readiness for discussion.
Such questions are especially useful when it comes to evaluating a particular historical event or a work of art.
5. Combined- complex questions that require a detailed answer. They can combine different types questions, with one question serving as the basis for the others.
The art of asking questions involves, among other things, the ability to combine questions different types but in the same direction. The responses received provide a complete picture of the situation.
By learning to ask questions, you will become more thoughtful and attentive in answering others, using your ability to reason and analyze the situation. Answering, you will mentally plan, breaking big questions on individual elements, and moving from simple answers to more detailed ones. Mastering the art of asking questions indicates your interest and deep knowledge of the topics discussed.
