Optimism is a matter of practice

It often happens that a person mistakenly believes that he should find the causes of a difficult situation, prove the correctness of his actions - and survive hard times It will be easier. But all these futile attempts only exacerbate despair, depression and self-pity.

The ability to rejoice, according to psychologists, is nothing more than a habit. In the brain of a person who does not know how to extract positive from any events occurring in his life, the neural pathway responsible for positive perception peace. This same feature human body can be expressed more plain language: everyone can program themselves to happy life and good health.

Making optimism a habit is not so difficult. You just need to find and "deposit" own memory those inconspicuous at first glance little things (fleeting feelings, smells or sounds), on which, like a hook, the positive “clings”.

As one of the most simple methods“Positive looping” psychologists advise beginning lucky ones, finding themselves in this or that situation, to ask themselves: “What benefit can I get from this experience?” This and similar questions, based on a feeling of gratitude to Fate, are the simplest and most effective way change the train of thought and get rid of despondency and depression forever.

Negative experiences are valuable too.

Many people fear that an unconditional belief in success will lull their vigilance, make them vulnerable, and attract unhappiness into their lives. According to the American psychotherapist Philip Perry, the main condition for success is to learn to accept negative events and feelings instead of avoiding them. Escape from unpleasant experiences, Philip is sure, is tantamount to a forced stop in the very heart of a viscous swamp, personifying an unlived experience or a voluntary refusal to receive an important life lesson.

Prayer helps you get through hard times

Psychologists believe that it is much easier for believers to survive difficult times than their non-religious counterparts in mind. Among Christians, one of the ways to cope with their life ups and downs is prayer for other people. Wishing others happiness, health and good luck, it is easier for a person to understand that his own difficulties are no different from other people's adversities.

Getting into a difficult situation, a person faces a choice: to love, to believe, to accept, to give, to care, to be afraid, to attack, to manipulate... and so on. The one who chooses love casts out fear and anger. The one who chooses war sinks deeper and deeper into the abyss of hatred.

Hard times happen to all of us sooner or later. You just need to be able to survive them and remember that sooner or later the black stripe will be replaced by a light one. True, few succeed. Is there some secret to getting through hardships?

Professor Carol Morgan reveals the secrets, noting that the reason lies largely in our attitude to the surrounding reality. We will talk about these things that will surely help us in difficult times.

Accept reality. famous quote Buddha says that all our suffering is caused by resistance to reality, to what surrounds us. Perhaps it’s worth stopping here and letting yourself think about this thesis for a minute. The philosopher directly says that all our suffering is generated by our refusal to perceive reality. If we can change something around us, then we should do it. But if change is simply impossible, then life gives us two options. You can accept the situation and not accumulate unnecessary negativity, or you can begin to suffer, arousing pity for yourself and complaining about the imperfection of the world.

How does the problem appear. It turns out that the problem arises at the moment when we ourselves visualize and designate it. That is our worst enemy, which gives rise to trouble - ourselves. Our happiness depends on our outlook on life. If you single out a part of your life and call it all a problem, then this tangle will begin to fill with negativity. It might be worth considering what valuable lessons can be learned from the current situation? Then it will no longer be a problem.

Start changing the world with yourself. The way we see external world, is fully consistent with our internal. There are probably people around us whose lives are immersed in a series of stresses and chaos. But is this not a reflection of the disorder that reigned in their souls? It is easy to believe that circumstances affect us. In fact, everything is exactly the opposite - we can change ourselves, and this will improve the situation around us.

Failure does not exist. The words "failure" and "failure" simply shouldn't be in our vocabulary. Any great person on the way to success, he failed, returning again and again to his work. Thomas Edison said that on the way to the invention of the light bulb, he did not fail. It's just that along the way, he discovered 99 ways his invention didn't work. Let our failures teach us, because they give us information about which path to avoid in the future.

Our best is on its way to us. When we don't get what we want, we must trust that it is still on its way to us. If you look back at your life, it turns out that our victories happened after some defeats or failures. Rejection of a good job can also have good consequences We will be closer to family. We just have to believe that everything happens in a way that leads us to something better.

We must appreciate the present. We always live in the future, striving for it, forgetting about the present. But the moments we have now will never come again. There is something precious in every moment of our time that is worth capturing and not letting it pass us by. Time flies, life inexorably turns into memories. Perhaps someday we will miss those moments that we don’t appreciate at all now.

Don't cling to desires. Most of us live with bound brains". This means that we give too much great attention our dreams. And if the plan does not happen, then we acquire negative emotions. Why not start practicing "separate mind" after that? Each of us has our own wishes, but we need to learn how to be happy, even if we don’t get it. In any case, our emotions must be kept positive or at least neutral.

Acknowledge your fears and be grateful for them. It turns out that fear can teach us a lot. Overcoming it will allow us to get closer to victory. Many young people are afraid to speak in public. But life develops in such a way that in life they then have to communicate with large groups of people. And some even teach others the art themselves. public speaking. And you can overcome your fears with the help of regular practices. We just need to understand that fear is nothing but a figment of our imagination.

Allow yourself to be joyful. Oddly enough, some people just don't allow themselves to have fun and enjoy life. These people know nothing about true happiness. Someone is completely immersed in their problems, his inner world- sheer chaos. These people do not know what they would become without such a burden. That is why you need to give yourself the opportunity to be happy. And it doesn’t matter that it will be a small moment, it is important in general to periodically focus on positive aspects own life.

You shouldn't compare yourself to others. Often people, comparing themselves with others, note their inferiority. But why not compare yourself with those who live even worse? Even the unemployed can at least be glad that he receives unemployment benefits. But most of the world's inhabitants live in conditions of extreme poverty. Girls who are far from the standards of photo models should understand that there are few real natural beauties. And, most likely, you are more attractive than many. Why not think about it?

You cannot consider yourself a victim. If we are someone's victim, then only our thoughts, actions and phrases. No one is plotting or doing anything specifically against us. Our life experience created by ourselves. You just need to take responsibility for your life into your own hands and understand that it is quite possible to survive the difficulties. And you need to start by changing your thoughts and actions. It is worth abandoning the mentality of the eternal victim of circumstances and start becoming a winner.

Everything around is bound to change. It is said that the ring of the ancient King Solomon was inscribed "This too shall pass." It happens that a bad situation develops, from which there is simply no way out. And it seems that there is a vicious circle. But change is sure to come. They say that nothing is eternal except death. Therefore, we must abandon the idea that nothing can be changed and the circle will be closed. Sooner or later everything will change. And how quickly this happens depends on our actions. By itself, the situation is unlikely to magically improve.

Everything is possible. It is worth believing that miracles can happen every day - this is an absolute truth. But in this article it will not be possible to tell about all unusual cases happening to people. Some were able to heal incurable disease while others suddenly met their fate. And these things happen all the time. You just have to believe that it happens. And with the realization of miracles in our lives, it will be possible to win the whole battle.

Each of us has hard times. And those who were at the top did not fall there from the sky. What truths are based on people who overcome difficulties and go to the intended goal? If someone has already walked this path, then you can conquer your peak. How to make a wiser choice how to survive and not lose yourself?

What doesn't kill us makes us stronger...Friedrich Nietzsche)

The wisest, most successful and respected people, which we know, were not always like that and were not always at the top of their glory.

Of course, they knew both defeats, and failures, and poverty, they lost loved ones, but they, nevertheless, managed to get out of the depths of their own experiences and despair to the light of hope.

There have been ups and downs in everyone's life. Only after experiencing this, they learned to feel, understand and appreciate their life.

Hard times harden a person, fill him with understanding, sympathy and deep wisdom. People are not born like that - they become like that ... or do not become.

The secret is that everything depends on us. When they come hard times, and we are faced with difficult trials, we either allow this situation to do anything to us (even destroy) or become stronger.

The choice is ours.

Whenever you are faced with a choice, be careful: do not choose what is convenient, comfortable, respectable, recognized by society, honorable. Choose what resonates with your heart. Choose what you would like to do, regardless of the consequences. (Osho)

Pain is a part of life that helps you grow

Many people are afraid of themselves, afraid of their feelings. A person can talk for a long time about how wonderful life is, how bright love is, and then, shivering, turn away from them.

Often, we hide our brightest feelings from ourselves - because both love and life itself sometimes hurt a lot, so we try to protect ourselves from feelings that bring pain, and in fact - to protect ourselves from life.

For some reason, since childhood, we are convinced that any pain is bad, it is harmful to us. But how can you experience true love and real life if we are afraid of our feelings?

Pain awakens a person, makes him feel alive and loved. And most of the time we try to hide it.

How do we know how strong we are in difficult situation? It all depends on how we manage, that's all that matters.

Pain is our feeling, and all feelings are part of the person himself, part of our personal reality. And, if we are ashamed of them and hide them, we allow lies to destroy our reality.

We have the right to feel and endure pain, the right to be scarred from this pain ... We have the right to feel our life and love, we have the right to become stronger, wiser, more true.

...remember, the person who hurt you is caused by you. He is a doll. Do not be angry with him, but bestow gratitude for his strength, for his help on the path to the New. (Amu Mom)

The right attitude is half the battle

We all have dark days and hard times. Hoping that our life will always be wonderful is like dreaming about the sea, where the waves always rise up and never fall down.

After all, rising up and falling down, the waves are part of the same ocean. You will be able to come to terms with the reality of your life's ups and downs.

Then it will become clear that, sometimes, in order to fly up to the heights, you have to go down. To emerge to the surface, you need to push off from the bottom.

Life, of course, is imperfect, but still beautiful. After all, our goal is not the achievement of perfection, but a well-lived imperfect life.

Opening your eyes every morning, look fresh eyes your life and accept everything as it comes. Everything is wonderful around.

Every day is an invaluable gift. Those who think that life will always be with them are mistaken. She deserves admiration and respect.

Don't let negativity seep into your soul. Don't let bitterness get in the way of experiencing the sweetness of life. Don't let the dark days rob you of hope.

Let others disagree, be proud of what you know - the world is beautiful! Change your thoughts and you will change your reality.

If you are doing something beautiful and sublime, and no one notices this, do not be upset: the sunrise is generally the most beautiful sight in the world, but most people are still sleeping at this time ... (Osho)

And it is especially important to tune in correctly when it will be necessary to recognize that ...

Biggest fears are an illusion

When they come hard times It's not easy for everyone to follow the voice of their heart and continue on their way, but if you let false fear stop you, that's where the real tragedy is.

Fear can be overwhelming, it can seem huge to you (in the history of mankind, fear has destroyed more people than all the armies of the world), but... he is not at all as strong as you think.

Your fear only has as much power as you give it. Yes, yes, it is you who are the master of your fears, so use this power!

The key to the problem is acknowledging your fear and concretizing it. Illuminate it with the radiance of your words so that it does not remain an all-consuming and formless darkness surrounding you.

Fear will not let you forget about yourself, but your heart will remain open to meeting the enemy. Because refusing to fight is already a defeat.

Each of us has the power to conquer our fear if we face it face to face. Be bold! And remember that being brave means overcoming your fear.

It means you don't let fear stop you on your path in life.

To accept the challenge of the unknown in spite of all fears is what courage is. There are fears, but if you accept the challenge again and again, gradually these fears disappear. (Osho)

Experience makes progress

Over time, we realize that life is not at all what we imagined it to be - neither harder nor easier - it is both easy and difficult at the same time.

But all this makes life more interesting. If a person manages to maintain a positive attitude towards his life, then almost any of its surprises will be pleasant for him.

If you stop expecting life to be just the way you like it, you begin to appreciate it more for the way it is.

It's only with time that we realize that greatest gifts life does not present us in the package in which we expect.

If not everything works out as we plan, we still get experience. And experience is the most valuable thing we can get from life, because it is it that makes us stronger.

There is a power in each of us that can turn our wounds and worries into wisdom - we just have to accept it.

Accept what happens to us, use the knowledge and experience gained in order to continue our life path.

The experience gained gives us a huge advantage in the future.

The Japanese say: "If in your life there has not been any crisis that is difficult to survive, you should buy these experiences for a lot of money."
This mysterious people knows that wisdom does not come to a person at birth or with age. Wisdom is acquired in difficult situations experience, and with it comes an understanding of life.

Your life is your responsibility

Most of people are afraid of responsibility. By blaming other people for our misfortunes, we are denying that we are responsible for our own lives—we are handing over control of our lives to someone else.

Ultimately, we will always have to pay for it. And the sooner we stop trying to shift responsibility for our happiness to someone else, the happier we will be.

And if you are unhappy now, it is your own fault. Our happiness, above all, depends on how much we trust ourselves - in our determination to be in charge of our own life, from now until its very end.

And it doesn't matter who was responsible for it before. Everyone should start thinking for themselves, decide for themselves, independently choose their own path in life.

Be your own hero own life and not its victim.

Your life is a canvas! Draw what you want and don't listen to those who can't draw!

The present is the only thing to worry about

The past no longer exists - we can't change anything there. There is no future either. We live only here and now, and we deal with reality as it is at this moment.

Of course, we work for the benefit of our ideal tomorrow. But in reality, we are still dealing with the present.

Often people turn away from the present, do not appreciate it, thinking that somewhere is better, brighter, more beautiful. They wish they were somewhere else.

But the whole secret is that the place where you are now is exactly where you need to be in order to get to where you would like to be tomorrow.

Your friends, your family are too beautiful to be ignored. Remember how wonderful it is to live, love, dream.

Look around wide open eyes and see a sea of ​​possibilities in front of you. Most of what you're afraid of simply doesn't exist.

Much of what you love is closer than you think. You look how, after all, your life is beautiful.

Happiness can only be created for oneself in the present. It does not have the ability to exist somewhere in the future, or remain in the past, as many people think.

Too many young people look forward to happiness in the distant future, and too many old people think their better days have long been left behind.

Don't let the past and future steal your present.

Die to the past every moment, whether the past is heaven or hell. Whatever it is, die to it and be fresh and young and be born again... (Osho)

You always have something to be grateful for

AT hard times being positive is not at all naive - it is your symbol of composure and strength. Life always gets better when you smile.

You're doing the right thing if you keep smiling and appreciating your life, despite the fact that there are reasons to cry and complain.

Imagine that you wake up tomorrow with only what you were grateful for yesterday?

Think about the beauty that surrounds you, look at it and smile. Be grateful for all the little things in your life, because if you put them together, you will see that they are not such small things anymore.

And at the end of the day we have lived, it is not happiness that will make us grateful, but gratitude will make us happy!

All you have is already more than enough, more than enough to be grateful and grateful. Don't ask more from existence. Just enjoy what is given to you. And the more you enjoy, the more you will be given... (Osho)

Give the seed time to grow

Do you remember how uninteresting it was to solve easy problems at school, it became boring.

So it is in life - what is easiest to achieve is rarely worth achieving. Any good deed takes time to complete.

A little patience - and the desired results will be available to you.

And imagine what would happen if all our desires were instantly fulfilled, what then to dream about? We would lose the pleasure of waiting for the result and the way to achieve the goal.

Patience is not the ability to wait at all, it is the ability to maintain a good mood, while at the same time applying enough effort to achieve the intended goal.

The desire to stay focused while moving one small step. By moving one small pebble, in the end, you can move mountains, because every pebble, even a small one, moves us forward.

Do not dream of instant fulfillment of desires! You deserve more. What is easy to get is just as easy to disappear.

And something for which you need to spend a lot of time and effort very often outlasts its creators.

Even if you are very talented and put in a lot of effort, some results just take time: you won't have a baby in a month even if you get nine women pregnant. (Warren Buffett)

No one has the right to judge and evaluate

On the way to our goal, we often turn to others for evaluation of our progress. But often people are simply not capable of this ...

Remember that you did not come into this world to justify someone else's expectations, like others - not to meet yours.

Better carve your own unique path through life. After all, for each of us, even the concept of success is our own.

Success is life lived the way you want it to be.

You don't have to be a flamboyant personality to impress people. You shouldn't be famous person to mean something.

You don't have to be a millionaire to be successful. And you don't need other people's approval. Just believe in yourself and what you want to achieve.

You can be humble and quiet person and yet be a master of your craft. Quiet success is much more real than bright, flash-like success.

You determine what is success for you. You, not anyone else.

When someone condemns you, remember the immortal words of Aristotle. Hearing blasphemy against him, he remarked: “I try to live in such a way that no one will ever believe in these words of yours ... (Osho)

You are not alone

When you feel bad and scared, looking around, you can see a bunch of people who, it would seem, are in perfect order.

But in fact, this is not entirely true. Every person is difficult and difficult in their own way.

If we have the courage to talk to people about this, we will understand that this feeling of loneliness and loss is common to everyone.

Many of the people around at that very moment are experiencing the same experiences and the same feelings.

And no matter how difficult or miserable your current situation seems to you - know that many more people are experiencing the same emotions with you.

And when you tell yourself "I'm all alone," it's just your flustered brain telling you a convenient lie.

You are not alone, because everything that happens to you has already been experienced and felt by other people. They may not be around you and you can't communicate with them right now, but they really exist.

And if you are in despair now, know that I often experience, feel and think almost the same as you. I am very worried about a lot of the things that are bothering you, and although some people may not understand us, we understand each other. You are not alone!

The one who can be happy alone is real personality. If your happiness depends on others, then you are a slave, you are not free, you are in bondage ... (Osho)

P.S.

The fact that life tricky thing is one of her greatest gifts. Just facing life's difficulties we are getting stronger.

This power enables us to successfully achieve our innermost and most cherished desires.

It is precisely because life is difficult that we can make it truly wonderful.

It is the complexity of our lives that gives us a chance to overcome all these difficulties - and get unforgettable pleasure from it.

This gives us the chance to truly change our lives.

So remember...

When they come hard times we must be strong enough to deal with them. Do not dream of an easy life - rather, dream of strength sufficient to overcome the obstacles that have risen before us.

What helps you cope better? hard times? What truths help you keep going no matter what? Leave a comment, share your thoughts.

When from everything that has fallen on you, you reach a state that you can no longer withstand, in no case back down. This is the place where your destiny will change... (Osho)

Be the hero of your own life!

Life is a series of ups and downs. Sometimes you are at the top, and then you fall rapidly down. But in difficult times, we need much more support and guidance.

How you respond to defeat really defines the kind of person you are. If you can get through a difficult time, not only will your life become happier. You will be able to grow as a person.

1. Stay positive

This is just a small step towards getting through hard times, but it is very important. If you stay positive, you will be in best position, and also change in better side.

When things get tough in life, you can do two things: stay positive and remind yourself that there is light at the end of the tunnel, or curl up in a fetal position and think of yourself as a victim of circumstance.

This doesn't mean you can't have a bad day, or feel a little discouraged or even shed a tear. But ultimately, you have to pick yourself up and move forward.

2. Be creative

There are times when you cannot do very much to make a difference. You just have to accept it. But there are other situations where you must actively work to improve things.

Problem solving is not on the surface. If that were the case, you wouldn't be in a difficult situation. But if you can step back and look at the situation from a different perspective, you may find something that will help you.

A great example of how to be creative in times of trouble is the story of the creation of Wrigley chewing gum. The founder of the company - William Wrigley the Younger - in the 1890s worked as an ordinary seller of soap and washing powder, but always offered free chewing gum to all his customers. His career as a salesman didn't work out, but he noticed one thing that changed his life forever: people liked chewing gum a lot more than the products he sold. This was creativity who helped him through difficult times and contributed to his success.

3. Learn

When you are in a difficult situation, try to connect all the events that preceded it and understand what went wrong, and most importantly, why it happened. So you can understand what could have been done differently. In this way, you can not only learn from your mistakes, but also understand what can help you. Ultimately, you will get a really clear picture of what you need to do to avoid being in the same situation again. If this happens, you will know how to minimize problems. It is much easier to get through difficult times if you know that the chances of the situation repeating are practically zero.

4. Make changes

Once you've learned the key takeaways from everything that's happened, you'll need to start making changes. If it can be implemented right away - do it. You don't want to be at the peak of difficulties any longer than necessary. If it's something you can't do right now, just keep that in mind and use it when the situation calls for it.

There is no point in living through difficult times if what you have learned does not directly affect your actions. You are much more resilient than you think you are.

5. Think about what you are grateful for

Being grateful is about showing appreciation for all the good things that have happened to you in life instead of focusing on the negative. You must clearly know what you are grateful for and to whom.

Write down everything you are grateful for in your life. An even more powerful exercise is to focus on the one person you are most grateful for and write about it. Then it is best to read this note with him.

The difficulties that you have now in your life will seem less significant to you compared to what good is happening in it.

6. Focus on what you can control

Some situations are beyond your control, and no matter what you do, you cannot change anything. If you waste your energy and time on things you cannot change, you will be disappointed. The focus on the negative makes the situation even bleaker than it really is.

Instead, you need to focus on things that are within your control, as this the only way make changes that might help you. Make a list of everything you can control and focus on those things. Ignore anything that isn't on the list.

7. Realize that you have come a long way.

Sometimes we are so focused on our journey that we don't have time to look back and see how far we've come. Think about everything you've already done. You will feel much more confident when you realize that you are making progress. And the light at the end of the tunnel will become much brighter.

8. Create your social circle

Surround yourself the right people is one of the most important things you can do for yourself, especially if you Hard times. Surround yourself with loving, caring, and honest people.

They must be loving, as even a little love makes bad days so much better. They should be caring as having someone who genuinely thinks about your well being is very important to you. But they also need to be honest. You need someone who can look you in the eye and tell you the truth. Their honesty is perhaps exactly the piece of information you need to understand when trying to get through tough times. And they should be available to you at any time. When you pick up the phone hoping to find someone honest or caring, it's important to have someone to answer your call.

The right environment is also very important because you have someone who understands what it's like to have a black streak in life and try to cope with it. If you meet someone who has had a situation similar to yours, you can ask for advice and find out what he did, and then apply it in your life.

9. Be kind to yourself

To survive in difficult times, you must take care of yourself. Take a walk in the park, exercise, read a book. It doesn't matter what exactly you do. The main thing is that it occupies your body and mind and does not allow you to lie on the bed and think about self-pity.

10. Sorry

If someone is to blame for the fact that you ended up in bad situation, then the natural reaction will be anger and resentment towards this person.

But what happens if you forgive him instead? You have accepted what happened and you no longer harbor resentment towards him. You will feel better because instead of focusing on negative feelings to this person, you will be able to move forward.

You can't really go through hardships if every thought you have is about how upset you are by the person responsible for this mess. This will only complicate things more.

But perhaps the difficulties you are currently trying to overcome are a direct result of your actions? Chances are you're constantly beating yourself up for it. You can't forgive it and feel almost obligated to self-flagellate.

The problem is that by doing this you only make yourself worse, because this will not fix the situation. You have trapped yourself in your own hatred and bad feelings, in a whirlpool of anger and frustration and doubt that you can control anything. This will eventually lead to disaster.