We all sometimes do things that we later regret, or say hurtful words when it would have been better to remain silent. How to learn to forgive yourself, to live in harmony with your " dark side”and at the same time not slide into self-justification?

Nobody's perfect. Whatever we do, misunderstandings, quarrels and resentments inevitably arise from time to time. Imperfection is inherent in any person, and we do not need to be ashamed of it. We make mistakes and learn from them. Mistakes only become problems if we don't learn from them.

Often the cause of errors is fatigue or discontent. At the same time, we most often tend to take out our anger on loved ones. Sometimes we do something with the best of intentions, but the result is not what we expected. As a result, we feel that someone has been let down. We are often misunderstood. It is very unpleasant when a person dear to us begins to get angry because of words that we have never uttered. The result is feelings of guilt and self-blame.

Sometimes we say something we later regret, or we treat others in an inappropriate way that goes against our own value system. When we realize what happened, we often criticize ourselves more harshly than anyone else.

Accept your dark side means to accept yourself as a whole, with all the advantages, disadvantages and ambiguous features

1. Recognize and accept your "dark side". This is the part of your personality that you find difficult to acknowledge. Perhaps you do not like the way she looks, you do not want to admit that you find it difficult to control anger and aggression. Perhaps you do not want to admit that you are not healthy lifestyle life or hate your job.

To accept the dark side means to accept yourself entirely, with all the advantages, disadvantages and ambiguous features. Your imperfection does not diminish your human dignity.

On the contrary, it makes you unique personality. If you love yourself with all the features, it is very possible that a transformation will occur that will help solve the problems that arise in certain situations. Emotions and feelings associated with success and well-being will come true. By opening up to the wisdom that is hidden in your body, mind and feelings, you will discover the path to abundance.

The so-called error gave you new experience, new tools that may come in handy in the future

2. Be honest with yourself. As you embrace your dark side, you also become radically honest with yourself. It gives you the opportunity to rejoice in both your strengths and weaknesses, to rejoice in your humanity, which makes you such a unique and wonderful person. Being honest with yourself means being happy good deeds that you do to make the world a little better.

But it's also important to recognize that sometimes you fail to live up to expectations, yours and others'. Being honest with yourself means listening to emotions and sensations in the body, both pleasant and unpleasant. The closer you get to your natural human experiences, the easier it will be for you to forgive yourself.

3. Learn from mistakes. Sometimes they can become an opportunity for growth and development. Try to see them as new opportunities. Will it change your attitude towards what happened?

Assessing perfect mistake think about what you could have done differently. How would this change the situation? What could help you react and act differently? Think about how the experience has benefited you. The so-called mistake has given you new experiences, new tools that may come in handy in the future.

Man cannot be divided into good and bad parts. Each of us is the whole world emotions, sensations and spiritual experiences

4. Ask for forgiveness from those who have been hurt. It is impossible to go through life without hurting someone once. Forgiveness requires a sincere, sincere apology. Ask for forgiveness only for what you are really guilty of. Don't apologize to please someone. If someone is unhappy with something, this does not mean that you are responsible for it.

Apologies always carry more weight if you show your remorse to those who have been harmed by your actions. It is usually enough to show how much communication with them has changed you. They will understand that you are really sincerely remorseful.

5. Remember your good deeds. You - whole personality. Man cannot be divided into good and bad parts. Each of us is a whole world of emotions, sensations, thoughts and spiritual experiences. While I encourage you to fully experience your dark side, it is important to remember all the best you have done for others and for the world at large. Try to notice your good deeds! Feel them! Rejoice in the energy of your kindness! Don't count all those little ones good deeds that you do every day, something insignificant. Every little thing makes the world a little better.

6. Find rituals to help you forgive yourself. AT modern world, where many do not belong to any religion, you may lack a certain ceremony that will help give meaning life success and failures. Rituals help you come to terms with your nature. For example, in Christianity, the sacrament helps believers recognize their imperfection while reminding them that they are loved anyway.

Rituals don't have to be complicated. It could be something as simple as a daily family dinner where everyone talks about how their day went. Sharing meals with friends, spouses, relatives helps you feel like a part of something bigger, as if you reflect each other's human nature, with all its splendor and imperfection.

7. Befriend yourself. There are many tools to help you consciously accept reality at the level of body, heart and mind. Try to find what is right for you. I recommend the enneagram method. I like him because he helps people to be themselves without any judgment.

This method can help you learn forgiveness and help you recognize your potential weak spots. More importantly, this technique will help you get to know yourself better and get out of your comfort zone. She will tell you how to take better care of yourself and understand others. Learn more about personality traits people, you can learn to empathize with others as if you were yourself.

Sharing with loved ones simple pleasures life, we help ourselves and them to feel the connection that always exists between us

8. Take care of your body, eat right and exercise. Assess your lifestyle. Do you eat healthy food? Don't overeat? Are you physically active? Are you taking care of your mind by giving it a rest? Have you tried meditation? There are many varieties of meditation. I prefer so-called contemplative prayer because it does not require the mind to be completely free. It is enough not to let a restless mind prevent you from achieving inner peace.

Another similar method is mindful meditation. Mindfulness teaches you to focus on what is happening in inner world. To do this, it is important to allow your curiosity to look deeper into the psyche.

9. Remember that you are part of something bigger and higher. This can be achieved with the help of a religious community - a church, a temple, a mosque, a synagogue, etc. Most importantly, the community helps not to feel alone in their experiences.

If you are not religious, any activity that brings you closer to others will help. Have lunch with someone you love. Tell each other what is happening in your life, both joyful and sad. By sharing the simple joys of life with loved ones, we help ourselves and them to feel the connection that always exists between us. Thus we rejoice in miracles human nature with all its joys and hardships.

Being gentle with yourself will make it possible to face fear and insecurity.

Your life path will be rich in impressions, surprises, disappointments and miracles. If you learn to enjoy the journey that life is, you can find happiness and the meaning of existence.

Hidden inside of you large stocks emotional strength and wisdom to help you overcome hard periods and truly love life. Every time it seems that you are too strict with yourself, just listen to your feelings, thoughts and emotions, come to terms with them. At the same time, try to breathe slowly and deeply.

Being gentle with yourself will give you the opportunity to face fear and insecurity. There is no need to run away from these strong and unpleasant experiences. When you go to meet them, they lose their power. If you instead continue to hold on to them, they will only get worse.

You can become best friend to myself. It will take time to change your habits and attitude to life, to get rid of uncertainty. But gradually, by working on yourself, you will be able to create a new life for yourself.

How to forgive someone who does not ask for forgiveness

Forgiving someone is mostly not about that other person. When we forgive people, it is still for our own sake and our own peace of mind.

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“Sorry, forget it. Put up with the shortcomings of others the way you want them to put up with yours.

Phillips Brooks

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Forgiving someone is mostly not about that other person. When we forgive people, it is still for our own sake and our own peace of mind. . “Whether you realize it or not, if you hold on to your grudges, you are living in the past. When we are fully present here and now, there is no future or past. And no one makes us feel bad.” says self-confidence coach and journalist Susie Moore.

When we forgive someone, it is most often because they have already asked for our forgiveness. But what about those times when you don't get an apology? What about those who still hesitate to say: "Forgive me!"? Most people think that they are not worthy of forgiveness and continue to “nurture” this pain inside themselves. But we still need to take steps to forgive them. Not only for their benefit, but for our own.

HERE ARE 6 WAYS TO FORGIVE SOMEONE WHO DOES NOT ASK FOR FORGIVENESS.

…. FOCUS ON YOURSELF, NOT OTHERS.

Forgiveness is, as is commonly believed, the release of another from responsibility for his transgressions. However, when we switch from looking at other people to looking at ourselves, we can learn to heal ourselves from within. By allowing yourself to focus on yourself, how you feel and what is best for you, you will be able to forgive much more easily.

“Once you decide to forgive someone, you automatically free yourself from resentment, no matter who hurt you. It's a decision to learn from the betrayal, see your role in it (if there is one), and move on once you've analyzed your feelings enough." says Dr. Amy Wood.

It's only our habit of holding onto grudges that hurts. And resentment against those who do not even think to ask for forgiveness is usually the deepest. You are the only person you should care about when it comes to what and whom you need to control.

….TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOUR FEELINGS.

Other people have so much tangible power over us. But, despite the fact that their words and actions may affect us, we ourselves still have control over our feelings and behavior. Taking responsibility for our own feelings, we stop blaming others for how bad we feel and move on, moving away from negative emotions. When we stop feeling pain “through the fault of others”, we are immediately freed from both accusations and condemnation, which keep us in the trap of resentment.

“Changing the way you choose to look at other people’s influence on you… you will see new world limitless own potential… You will immediately know how to forgive and let go of anything.” - Says Dr. Vane W Daer.

Realize that you are the only person who has complete control over your feelings. And, realizing this, get rid of everything negative.

Forgive others not because they deserve forgiveness, but because you deserve peace.

…. TAKE RESPONSIBILITY .

Not everything is so one-sided. Since we can only see from our own point of view, we often find others wrong and guilty. We do not see that sometimes it was we who could do something that provoked the manifestations of their cold-blooded personality. By taking responsibility for your part of the fight, you will learn to let go of the other person's hurtful behavior much faster. So you may even be able to put up with the problem. And, accepting responsibility for your mistakes, incline the other party to the conflict to reconcile too.

…. STOP LIVING IN THE PAST .

If you refuse to let go of past hurts or anger, you cannot live fully in the present. You can easily find yourself thinking for a long time about the people who neglected you and caused you to feel bad now. When you keep thinking about it and keep reliving the emotions of the past, you deprive attention of those moments of your real life who need it.

“Research also shows that people who hold on to chronic unforgiveness experience prolonged stress, which affects immune system, making disease resistance problematic. Harmful thoughts have specific health consequences. Forgiveness gives you the opportunity to let go, not take everything to heart and know true acceptance even at the peak of chaos. says divorce attorney Lori S. Rubinstein, JD, PCC.

So take a deep breath and start living for today. Once you find peace in your present, you will be able to forgive insults and even those who do not ask for forgiveness much easier.

….DO NOT TRY TO FEEL LIKE YOU ARE NEGLECTED.

Sometimes we deliberately look for reasons to be offended. Righteous anger feels very good, and there are people who yearn to feel it again and again. But in the same vein, as you go through life looking for the feeling of being neglected, you may find yourself picking up resentments and never live to apologize. Let go of these grievances, and you will be able to forgive much easier and faster.

….LOOK AT LIFE THROUGH THE PRISM OF LOVE.

This does not mean that you have to look at everything bad with love, but it is better to accept everything negative that happens in your life and learn from it. Something to learn.

The late Professor Lewis B. Smeds once said: “Forgiveness does not erase the bitter past. A healed memory is not a deleted one. On the contrary, forgiving what we cannot forget creates new way remember. We exchange the memory of the past for the hope of a new future.”

Based on this, if someone harms you, do not be offended, look at what happened and learn from the experience. What do you need: to be less tolerant of those who step over you? Or learn to accept people for who they are? Whatever the lesson, learn it so you can move on with your life.

Finally: Forgiveness should not be freeing the other person from guilt to the detriment of yours. own emotions. Rather, forgiveness should be something that helps you heal from the past and move on. When you forgive someone who is not going to apologize, you heal your mind and soul. It is “…a delightful way to honor yourself. It confirms to the universe that you deserve to be happy,” says marriage and family therapist

Andrea Brandt.

Who among us has not been offended in life? They criticized, did not appreciate, did not understand, did not hear ... And then there is an insult that sits in the heart like a splinter. How to get rid of it? How to forgive an offense? How to forget caustic words addressed to you? How to survive the betrayal of a friend? This article will teach you.

Resentment as a means of manipulation

Some psychologists say that resentment is a way to get what you want. This is especially true for close relatives. The wife, trying to teach a lesson to her late husband, pouts her lips and "takes a vow of silence." The husband accuses his wife of being unable to manage the household, hinting at constant meetings with girlfriends. Why do adults have such a need to offend? loved one for private purposes?

Psychologists say that all this comes from childhood. A child who likes a toy cries and begs for it from their parents. The little manipulator knows it's bad. Parents also know this, but they still buy the 25th doll or car. It is impossible to look at the tears of your baby without pity. We often use this method of manipulating others later in life. adult life. True, he works more often with close relationships.

Why does a person offend another?

What is the main reason why one individual offends another? We are often offended and do not think about it at all. But humiliation and verbal insults against us are often a disguised compliment on the part of our opponents.

Envy, unfortunately, is inherent in many people. Not many will praise a person who has achieved any heights. But there will always be those who will scold him and blaspheme. By doing his vile deed against us, the offender gains a sense self-importance. He "grows" in his own eyes. Moreover, the stronger his words affect us, the more joy and it will give him satisfaction. So why indulge him? Let's smile back at him and say pleasant words. We are concerned about the question of how to forgive an offense? Sometimes, in order to do this, it is enough to understand why we are humiliated and insulted.

Consequences of resentment

Perhaps many people find it difficult at times to forgive their enemies. Many people think: “Why should I forget the offense? My enemy will be happy if he does not suffer the deserved punishment for this. Learning to forgive is necessary for oneself, to preserve one's health. To understand this, just look at the following list of potential problems that can arise if you constantly replay an unpleasant situation in your head:

Decreased immunity;

thyroid problems;

Depression;

Diseases of the cardiovascular system;

Oncology;

Mental disorders;

Migraines, headaches.

At first glance, the connection between the occurrence of these ailments and the mood of a person seems unrealistic. But it is worth imagining what is happening inside the offended person in order to understand this. For example, a person was rude on the bus, fired from work for no reason, insulted ... What do most of us do in this case? Some are taken to take revenge, someone - to drink "bitter", someone becomes isolated in himself. But many of us will swallow the hurt and move on with our lives. Only here is the insult, the tension from it has not gone away. Negativity accumulates in our body. This will continue until negative energy won't find a way out. And the way out here can be severe depression, and nervous breakdown, and the most difficult disease, and so on. So why accumulate resentment in yourself? We need to learn how to neutralize them. How to forgive an offense and let it go will be discussed later.

How to remain calm in response to criticism?

A person sometimes with indignation perceives teachings from another person. And what can we say about the offensive words that he hears from others? Remaining calm in response to criticism is often very difficult. Of course, it is good to remain cool and unflappable in any situation. But how to curb your emotions when necessary? There are a few tips to help you do this:

Don't answer the offender right away. In anger, you can say a lot of things that you will later regret.

And then the question of how to save the situation, and not how to forgive insults, will come to the fore for you. The past cannot be returned. bad aftertaste from a quarrel will remain not only with your opponent, but also with you. Cool down and analyze the opponent's words. And only then parry.

Deceive the offender in his expectations. Konstantin Kushner, Russian historian and a teacher, said: "If you are offended, the enemy has succeeded." Know that the main goal of the opponent is to hurt you to the quick. So why should he give this pleasure? Smile and forgive him.

During an argument, ask the abuser, "What can I do to make things right?" Is he confused and unable to answer? So he has personal reasons to talk bad about you. Such criticism cannot be fair.

The brilliant Erian Schultz said: “To be offended by bad words to your address means to agree with them. This simple phrase explains everything. Do you consider yourself to be what your enemies are trying to make you look like? Of course not. But there is no point in proving them otherwise. It is better to step aside, leaving their words unheeded.

Do you want to know how to learn to forgive insults? Justify your opponents. Try to put yourself in their place and understand why they do it. Everything is simpler than it seems at first glance. Nature created one so angry, the second was offended today, and he shouted at you in the heat of the moment, the third has an unlucky day today, everything falls out of his hands, and he decided to “send everything to hell”, having quarreled with everyone, including you . Justified? Has it become easier? All that remained in my heart was pity for these poor fellows.

Live in the present. You need to forgive the offense in time, let go of the past and continue to go on your way. Focusing on quarrels with others will not lead to good.

The main thing is the inner core!

Only strong-willed people can remain calm in response to criticism and not be offended by insults and slander. Often we worry about the bad things we hear about ourselves. It doesn't matter if they said them to our eyes or behind our backs. But if we know that we have done nothing wrong, then why are we worried? The main thing is the confidence that we are right, that we are doing the right thing, that the truth is on our side. This conviction gives us calmness, firmness, determination. The inner core will not allow us to bend before hurtful insults and slander. And we will not have questions about how to forgive an offense and let go of the past, how to forget insults addressed to us, how to improve relations after a quarrel.

Exercise number 1 - revenge on the offender

Learning to forgive is not easy. Getting over yourself is sometimes difficult. Special exercises will help to do this, for example, such as "imaginary revenge on the offender." It consists in the following:

Exercise number 2 - forgiveness

Psychologists say that thoughts and words are material. By managing them, you can easily change your life as in positive side, as well as negative. And if positive thoughts and words carry creative energy, then negative ones produce a destructive effect. This knowledge will help us answer the main question that concerns us: "How to forgive an offense, finding peace and joy?" It is recommended to perform this exercise for 5-15 minutes a day. It is best to do this with a partner, but you can do it alone. It consists in the following:

1. Take a comfortable position.
2. Loudly and emotionally repeat several times, mentally addressing your offender: “You are good, cheerful, kind ... I forgive you for the fact that ...”.
3. After releasing the resentment, tell yourself this: "I forgive myself for ...".

Three ways not to be offended

1. Only truly strong and great people have self-control. Anyone can be offended, but only a select few can forgive. No wonder Socrates said: "To be offended is beneath the dignity of a person." And why are we worse than a great philosopher? Let's learn to forgive.
2. Let's replace resentment with pity. For example, our soulmate spoke sharply about some of our personal qualities: the husband said that his wife was a bad cook, the wife "broke her husband's brain" about small earnings, and so on. Now we are overwhelmed by the thought of how to forgive an offense to a loved one. Let's just take pity on the poor guy. After all, a person offends when he is in a state of anger, frustration or a bad mood. And all this adversely affects his health. It's already not easy for the offender.
3. You can try to find out why people offend us. A heart-to-heart conversation will help resolve an unpleasant situation.

The main thing is not to keep

Not everyone understands why we should learn how to forget the offense and forgive. But, as we have already found out, to experience negative emotions unhealthy. And resentment, anger, grief - these are perhaps the most negatively colored feelings. In our civilized society, it is not customary to openly express your emotions, especially negative ones. Therefore, many people, swallowing resentment, try to pretend that nothing happened. But experiences do not give them rest. Over time, the unpleasant situation is erased from memory, but the sediment on the soul from it still remains.

What to do in this case? release on time negative emotions outside so that they do not have time to harm our physical and mental health. You need to do this when you are at home alone. Otherwise, you can unpleasantly shock your household. You can break several plates on the floor, knock your fists on the pillow, imagining your offender in its place. You can just scream loudly at home when you are alone. It takes only a few minutes. But you will see how easy it will be for you after that. The world will no longer seem so dark and cruel, the offender - rude and heartless, and those around you - indifferent and ruthless.

Religion for Forgiveness

There are words in the Bible about loving your enemies and thanking them for the evil deeds they do. Christian preachers teach that the one who strikes on the cheek should also offer the other cheek for the blow, and the one who takes away the outer clothing should also give the shirt. At first glance it seems that these sayings are reckless. How can one not resist blows and thank one's enemies for beatings? But it seems nonsense only at first glance. It is important for a person to learn to forgive others in order to preserve their own health. An offended, upset, angry person is in a state of tension, constantly scrolling through the details of a quarrel and possible ways revenge. Negative thoughts deprive him of the joy of being. Having forgiven his offenders, he finds peace and tranquility. No more pain and suffering. You can move on and do good deeds. Life is already too short to waste it on such trifles as scandals and quarrels.

Why think about how to forgive an offense? Mother and father should not be offended at all. These are the people whose love for children is immeasurable. As for the enemies, here many people may have such questions: “Why should I forgive my enemy? Why do him good? Because he doesn't deserve it." There is a wonderful passage in the Bible that says, “If your enemy is hungry, feed him. If he is thirsty, then give him a drink: for by doing this you are heaping burning coals on his head.” These words have deep meaning. You cannot defeat evil with evil. Bad things can only be eradicated with good. And then, how to know, maybe your worst enemy will become your best friend. No wonder they say: "From hate to love - only one step." The Bible will tell you the answer to the question of how to learn to forgive offenses. Try to be a true Christian and follow all the commandments set forth in it. Then in your life there will be no place for resentment, hatred, revenge.

Prayer for forgiveness of enemies

When it becomes especially difficult for us, we turn to God for help. And it is not at all necessary to know certain prayers here. You can express in your own words what lies like a stone on our soul, and ask the Almighty for salvation. The answer to the question of how to forgive and let go is clear. We need to open and read the Bible more often, follow the commandments given in it. The Lord teaches us that we need to love our neighbor as ourselves, no matter what, that we should forgive our enemies, no matter what offense they may inflict on us. This is necessary, first of all, to the most offended.

And a prayer with which you can turn to God can be like this:

“Lord, our father, I ask you, give me the strength to forgive the people who offended me. You, the Merciful, taught us: “Love your enemies. Bless all who curse you. Do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who offend and persecute you." Give me the strength of my soul to forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing. Help me to reconcile with those who offended me in my soul. Let me find the joy of forgiveness."

You need to repeat this every day. And then you will no longer have questions about how to forgive the offense. Prayer saves from empty experiences and anxiety.

How to forgive a loved one and let go?

How many tears are shed when love leaves! It is very difficult after this to forget the betrayal of the second half and start life anew. It is especially hard for women in such situations.

These tips will teach them how to forgive a man for an offense, let him go and start life from scratch:

Give him all his things, remove all joint photos so that nothing reminds you of him;

Take a two-week vacation and fly to warm countries to relax;

Try not to isolate yourself, go to the cinema, cafes, clubs, somewhere where there are a lot of people, where life is in full swing;

Call your best friend for help, talk to her, cry, you will immediately feel better;

Write on a piece of paper all the shortcomings of your former lover, remembering all the bad things that are connected with him, tear up the sheet and mentally say goodbye to this "scoundrel".

Aphorisms of famous people about forgiveness

To be offended is common to all people. Curious what they say about it negative feeling famous personalities.

Oscar Wilde: The best way piss off your enemies - forgive them.

Thomas Sas: Stupid man He neither forgets nor forgives, the naive both forgets and forgives, the intelligent forgives but does not forget.

William Blake: "It is easier to forgive an enemy than a friend."

Johann Schiller: "Forgiveness is stronger than all victories."

Gilbert Chesterton: "A haughty apology is another insult."

Henri de Monterlant: “There are people to whom we forgive everything, and there are people to whom we do not forgive anything. Those to whom we do not forgive anything are our friends.”

Jean Paul: "A person is beautiful when he forgives himself or asks for forgiveness from another."

George Halifax: "Conscience and memory always diverge as to whether wrongs should be forgiven."

We found out the reasons why some people try to humiliate and insult others, and also looked at several ways to forgive an insult.

How to find the strength in yourself to forgive an insult.

We offend, offend us, it happens. But how to forgive an offense, and is it necessary to do it? Sometimes, it is unbearably difficult not only to forgive, but also to restrain oneself, so as not to offend in return the one who did not take pity on you.

Sometimes we are offended in such a way that the inflicted offense “settles” in the soul for a long time, constantly reminding us of ourselves, depriving us of peace and sleep. Psychologists say that if you do not “let go” of resentment, it can slowly, day after day, destroy a person from the inside. People are so arranged by nature that hatred and anger kill, because this is an unbearable burden that must be carried in oneself every day.

Forgiveness of the offender does not cancel the evil that he delivered to you, it frees you from an exorbitant burden, because an unforgiven offense is stressful condition in which you have to stay constantly. Probably, in order to forgive the one who hurt you, you need to remember something good that happened between you, that connected you. You need it, not him. If you constantly wind yourself up, remembering the pain of resentment over and over again, then you can forever stop smiling and enjoy the world around you. You can even destroy own health, having spent all the resources of his own psyche on experiences.

Try to analyze own thoughts and sensations. Think about whether the person who offended you is worried. It may happen that he doesn’t care, he doesn’t even remember that he offended you, and you think about him all day, maybe even look for excuses for him. Is the offender worthy of thinking about him? Probably not. Therefore, find the strength in yourself to forget, not to forgive, namely to forget about this person, convincing yourself that he is not worthy of your attention and your thoughts about him.

Naturally, the question of how to forgive an insult should be considered from a different angle when it was inflicted by one of the relatives. In this case, the issue requires an immediate solution - it is impossible to fence off from those who are constantly nearby, they cannot be deleted from life. good decision can be considered a heart-to-heart conversation, when the causes of the conflict are calmly clarified. It often happens that we ourselves provoke the creation of a situation, as a result of which offensive words are spoken to us. If this is so, then you need to find strength in yourself and, no matter how deep the offense is, apologize yourself. Of course, admitting one's own wrong is difficult, but one must be able to do it.

There is special category people, especially women who are offended by any trifle. They say about them: she came up with it herself - she was offended. It is important that at the same time, worst of all for themselves, often those whom they consider their offenders are not even aware of their misconduct.

To save mental health and peace of mind, you need to give yourself an attitude: never take offense at anything for nothing. It is recommended to perform the following exercise: every day, in the evening, already falling asleep, remember the one who offended you very much. Mentally imagine him, and say that you no longer hold evil, forgive, and let him go. If you do this constantly, then there will definitely come a moment - the pain will pass, you will be able to let go of the situation.

Even if it seems that the offense is “mortal” and it is impossible to forgive, remember that you cannot be offended forever - time will take its toll, because it is the best healer of offenses. Although, he needs a little help, and you can do it.

Summary

It is very easy to give advice on how to forgive an offense that does not want to leave the heart. Let everyone decide this issue for himself, fight pain and, perhaps, in time, forgive the offender, or forget about him forever. About him, and the hurt he caused. Most likely, this person is not worth thinking about for so long. Good luck.