What's in the article:

Each person, among acquaintances, has one with whom it is pleasant to communicate with everyone around. What is the secret? Today the site Koshechka.ru will tell , how to become nice person. You will also learn the rules of communication and ways of behaving in society, which will significantly help to establish relationships with people: they will make you a friendly, sociable, pleasant person in the eyes of others.

They are greeted by clothes ...

The first part of the proverb: “They meet by clothes, but see off by mind”, very relevant, in case you decide to change in better side. If you are thinking about how to become a nice person, start changing your appearance. Remember leading role it is not an expensive and fashionable outfit that plays here, but the accuracy of a person. People who take care of their appearance, well-groomed and neat, are always pleasant to others.

This advice is especially relevant if you want to make an impression of yourself as a pleasant person. with unfamiliar people . Work on your style. Watch how people who have achieved a certain success in life look like, take their style of dress as an example.

To be a nice person, learn smile. Control your friendly facial expression. Use this secret skillfully so as not to "overplay", because only a sincere smile can work a miracle.

Pleasant person - charming person. naturalness here main criterion charm. Avoid mannerisms, excessive looseness, remove pathos.

Secrets of communication

Psychologists have developed special rules which help to establish verbal contact with other people. By adhering to them, you will easily gain the authority of a pleasant person in communication.

• Learn to listen to your interlocutor;
• Do not interrupt the interlocutor;
• Refer to the interlocutor by name more often;
• Don't focus on the unpleasant side of the conversation;
• Avoid "abstruse" conversations;
• Don't go overboard with jokes;
• Do not be afraid to praise, say compliments (only sincerity is very important here);
• Make sure that you have a dialogue with the interlocutor, and not a monologue (theoretically, in time, you should speak exactly as much as the interlocutor is talking);
• If your opinion does not agree with the opinion of the opponent, boldly, but correctly defend your point of view;

To become a pleasant person, you need to remember that people are interested in talking mainly about themselves and their problems. People are attracted to people who listen and give. valuable advice. It is important to make it clear to the person that you are listening to him carefully, understand what it is about, and are ready to support him morally.

How to let a person know that you are attentive to what he tells you? In this case, use the sequence rule. During the conversation, use the information that you heard from him in the previous conversation. Build a connecting chain between the events that were discussed. Be interested in how the story you heard last time ended.

A sense of tact is the next trait that a pleasant person should be guided by. Such an interlocutor will never be intrusive, and in a conversation he will skillfully bypass unpleasant topics.

How to become a pleasant person in communication if you are forced to argue, to prove your point of view to your opponent? You also need to be able to argue beautifully! You can not impose your opinion through an ultimatum. All arguments must be expressed calmly, clearly and with reason.

A nice person is a sincere person. Any person is able to feel falseness, and insincerity only spoils the relationship.

“Sign language” is one way to make a pleasant impression on the interlocutor.

Scientists have proven that people perceive information in this way: 97% of information is perceived through non-verbal signals, the rest through words. "Sign language" performs the function exact expression what a person feels, and secondly, it performs the function of a deeper mutual understanding.

Methods non-verbal communication helping to become a pleasant person:

• Visual contact - demonstrates interest in the conversation;
• and poses. (People feel inner comfort with an interlocutor who has expressive motor skills, who has a relaxed-live expression on his face);
• Personal space. (Need to know the limits allowable distance between interlocutors so that the person with whom you are establishing contact does not consider that you are going to dominate the relationship).

It's easy to be a nice person. The main thing is to want it, to set such a goal for yourself. Using the above recommendations, you will easily achieve success, become a sociable and pleasant person.

How to change and become better, more a good man, is of interest to many modern people striving for new heights. If you are not kind and always ready to help, then it is unlikely that you will be able to achieve satisfaction with life, real inner happiness.

How to become a good person, where to start.

Also, it keeps self-esteem on high level, therefore, it is beneficial not only to others, but also to the person himself. The path of becoming is difficult and involves huge amount difficulties. First of all, you will have to break yourself, your previous habits and also a lot of reflection.

Who is a good person?

Everyone has their own idea of ​​who is good.

Not always what is said really matters in practice, since the criteria that are called become completely insignificant compared to others.

That's why you can't be good to everyone. What is accepted in one society is completely unacceptable in another..

For example, in a company drinking people a non-drinker will be a black sheep, and it is unlikely that he will enjoy any respect. And if he refuses to drink, then at least sidelong glances will be turned on him.

But in the company of inveterate healthy lifestyles, a person who even moderately consumes alcohol will be considered bad. Therefore, you need to look at the situation.

This is not to say that a good person always adapts to the norms of others. He may well impose his demands, but he does it carefully and imperceptibly to others.

“They don’t climb into someone else’s monastery with their charter.” But any charter to some extent provides for how to become a leader and set your own rules.

Any charter provides how to become a leader and establish your own rules of life!

True leader will always appear good in the eyes of the majority, even though he does not try to fit in

It is not at all necessary to always strive for leadership, but being responsible (and this is one of its main features) is a must!

If you try to generalize very roughly, which is quite difficult, given the variety social norms.

A good person has the following character traits:

But this is not all that is needed for self-development.

The first step is to develop reflection.

If the question of how to become a good person is spinning in your head, this is already a very good sign. So, to some extent, this quality is developed

But you need to watch that there are no extremes. Reflection and introspection is not self-digging and self-flagellation.

Willpower training - the path to self-improvement

A person can engage in introspection for days, but never come to anything. Why? because in a state of strong emotional upheaval the ability to think soberly is reduced by 70%.

Reflection and introspection should mean calmly thinking about the answer to the question of how to improve yourself.

Here are some rules for developing reflection:

1. Need to read books on self-development, simultaneously asking the question: how does this apply to me? Maybe I have one too?
2. You need to ask yourself“How would you do it? Am I perfect?" All people are imperfect, and you can't be completely good. Therefore, you cannot criticize yourself for this. The advantage of this question is that a person admits that now he has blundered and outlines the route of self-development. But at the same time he does not criticize and gives himself the right to do wrong.
3. It is important to train willpower.

How to become a good person tomorrow. Instruction

Where to start to succeed and not stop there. Do the right things today to be a better person tomorrow!

Here's how to be a good person tomorrow!

• No need to hurry. Self-development is an endless process. This does not mean that you should give up trying to become better because of this. If a person hopes that a point will come when he considers himself good and rushes to it, nothing will come of it.
• Only one skill needs to be trained at a time. Don't try to cover everything at the same time.
• Good deeds must be counted. This is the most general advice. After some time, there will be a desire for the figure to become even larger. But without willpower, a person will even forget to count.
• should be given to people positive emotions. If a person considers an act good, but others do not consider it as such, then such an act is worthless. Therefore, it is necessary to look at the emotions of the other.
• It is important to practice empathy. This must be done in order to recognize the most subtle emotional notes of other people.

How to become a good person according to the Bible, Christianity, Orthodoxy

The main Christian rule says: "Love your neighbor as yourself." This is main principle to follow in order to become a good person. How?

To begin with, you should start to be interested in other people, and everything will become clear.

Christian qualities are useful for self-development.

It is also very important not to fall into pride about your good deeds and take them for granted.

Humility is a very necessary Christian quality. You can’t be proud of your “goodness” for the slightest reason, because in life you can’t always be good. In any case, a person is capable of sinning, and if reflection is not developed, then he will not even know about it.

It is very important to pray. The texts of prayers in Orthodoxy and Christianity, in general, are structured so that a person understands what to strive for.

How to become a good person according to Islam?

To become a good person according to Islam, you need to conform to a very a large number criteria.

Here are some of them:

1. Faith and piety. All human virtues, not supported by faith in Allah, will have no meaning after death, although in the present life, of course, the benefits from them will be invaluable.
2. Mind and intellect. Allah orders every Muslim to try to grow intellectually, because this faith itself is based on a rational understanding of one's life path.
3. Physical strength. Naturally, it is needed in order to protect the weak and help them, and not to satisfy selfish whims.
4. Success in business. Entrepreneurship is not only an opportunity to earn money, but also to provide other people with work and money, and also to give customers what they need. So this is a good thing, and history knows many successful entrepreneurs who practice Islam.
5. Respectability. The appearance of a Muslim must be excellent and comply with Sharia law.
6. Benefit to society. The system is simple - a good person is one who is useful to other people.
7. Ability to live in a family with all the qualities necessary for this: responsibility, the ability to earn money, raise children, and so on.

How to change and become a good person from an egoist

First you need to figure out what an egoist is. This is a person who does something only for himself, and nothing to others.

It is not at all necessary to become an altruist and deprive yourself of all possible pleasures for the sake of others, but you need to learn to find a balance.

Everyone is selfish to some extent, and that's okay. But if you constantly deny yourself, then the quality of helping others will be low.

To stop being selfish and become a good person, you need to focus on doing good. You can start with a simple thing - mindfulness of others. You have to learn to anticipate their needs.

When communicating with a person, one should from time to time ask the question: “what does he want?”, “What does he lack?”, and give it to him.

How to be a good person for friends

In each social group their rules and laws. Therefore, there are no universal tips on how to become a good person for friends.

How to be a good person for a girl

Being a good guy is an art, and several recommendations do not fully describe it.

Here are some tips for guys:

1. Be honest. If you constantly lie, then not only the girl, but the guy himself will get discomfort. Everyone wants trusting relationship, and this is a mutual thing. At right attitude relations to the information received from each other will develop by themselves.
2. Positive emotions. You need to be positive and in no case do not overload the girl with problems. At the same time, it is necessary to openly express own feelings. You should be more optimistic, then you won’t have to hide the negative in order to please the girl.
3. Need to remember everything she says. And brains will develop, and relationships will strengthen. Very often quarrels are due to the fact that a guy bad memory. He really does not remember well, but at the same time the girl thinks that he does not need her. It is an incredibly pleasant feeling when another person remembers some little thing that was voiced six months, or even several years ago.
4. Romance is the art of creating positive emotions and turning routine into a fairy tale. It is necessary to master this craft, and then the girl will be pleased with the guy.
5. To compliment. Only the perfect compliment is obtained spontaneously, sincerely. The main thing is not to be shy to give compliments.

How to be a good person for a child

To become a good person (father or mother), you must have authority, and not impose it on your son or daughter. How? It is necessary to explain your position, and not force the child.

In no case should you adhere to one of these parenting styles:

1. Dominant overprotection. This is when a parent controls the child in everything, imposes his way of life on him, makes him do what he says. Leads to criminal behavior, alcohol and drug addiction or suicide. The reason is simple - a child needs love, and if it is given in bad company, then he goes there. And if there is no person at all who is able to give love, then this leads to suicide.
2. Permissive hyperprotection. Here the parent is too protective of the child, fulfilling his slightest whims. Leads to the fact that the latter grows up as an egoist and complete opposite good man.
3. Hypoprotection. This is when parents do not pay attention to the child at all or try to pay off love.
4. Random upbringing. The parent is highly dependent on the mood. If the mood is bad - punishes for nothing, if good - rewards for nothing. Such upbringing creates severe trauma and even increases the risk of schizophrenia in a son or daughter.

How to quickly become a good person

It is impossible to quickly become a good person, because this route is a lifetime. The pace of progress along this road directly depends on the efforts that a person makes. That's what willpower is for.

Controlling emotions and actions inappropriate behavior people are very important quality good man.

the ability to control one's actions and react flexibly to the situation is most important to gain respect from other people

How to become a good person in communication

Need to control own emotions, do not worry when communicating. If a person develops all these qualities in himself, then he will be considered good in communication.

You can’t rush to develop yourself, because becoming a good person is not easy. To do this, you need to take into account many factors, change your character and attitude towards other people.

Useful videos on how to become a good person, where to start

How to become a good person, where to start:

How to become the best in your business: rules, tips for girls and men:

Portion of useful skills for self-development:

Regardless of how selfish or, on the contrary, altruistic our behavior, we all have our own value and significance. However, some people are the soul of the company and easily win the sympathy of others. Other people are less visible and neutral, they almost do not cause any emotions, and their presence or absence is usually not evident to anyone. The third people behave repulsively, they are avoided and try not to contact or communicate with them. If you want to get into group #1, try following the tips below.

1. Don't Forget Eye Contact

Eye contact is powerful tool in communication. If you look into someone's eyes long enough, you will begin to see that person's story and feel it. The result is a strong connection, which means sympathy and a friendly attitude.

2. Address people by their first names

Are you saying you're bad at remembering names? Most likely, this is how you justify yourself, because you are not interested in listening and studying another person. Make an effort to fix the names of people not only in your memory, but also in your soul. Remember each person as you would any other Additional information about him.

3. Get rid of defensive behavior

Protective and defensive behavior is an unnecessary manifestation of your insecurity. Any relationship is built on trust, and if you always act like you are preparing to repel another attack it won't attract people to you. From the outside, you will look passive-aggressive, which means an unpleasant and unfriendly person.

4. Recognize other people's victories and achievements

Every day, every person you come across is working on something (in every aspect and way). Some of them are more open and willing to talk about their activities, while others prefer to remain silent and not particularly talk about their plans. Your task is to determine what is important to the people around you. Everyone likes when their efforts do not go unnoticed, so do not skimp on kind words those who make progress and achieve something in life.

5. Show appreciation

Feel free to sincerely thank people for any of their words or actions. Do not take everything in your life for granted and appreciate any help and support. Not only that, always look for a reason to express your gratitude to others - this is a great start for establishing contact, subsequent quality relationships and communication.

6. Smile sincerely

A smile is a reliable weapon in any situation, especially when it is sincere. Do not stretch the tips of your lips for a semblance of a smile, making it on duty and feigned - you will not fool people with this. Any falseness is felt even at a distance. Instead, your smile should be natural, soft, and open so that you can really endear yourself. Remove the mask from your face and be yourself.

Each person is capable of becoming interesting to the people around him. And you don't have to be a millionaire to do that. CEO a large company or an astronaut. Indeed, often in order to attract attention, it is enough to be yourself. However, you need to learn how to emphasize the features that distinguish you from others. We offer 17 working tips that will help you become interesting to others.

Develop new skills

You can get the attention of other people by helping them in their most difficult different situations. To do this, it makes sense to acquire various useful skills - from web design to sewing. So you can always, for example, help a friend create a website for his business or sew an original blanket for his little niece.

Be Curious

It is unlikely that you will be interesting to someone, closing in on yourself and not accepting other opinions and points of view. Instead, you should actively look for new ideas and experience that will help you change the way you think and how you feel. Always be a student: be open to everything new and show curiosity, allowing you to expand your horizons.

Learn to tell stories

Perhaps you have a lot valuable information and experience, but they will not bring you success if you cannot communicate them properly to other people. That is why it is very important to learn how to tell stories. You don’t just need to dump everything on your interlocutors that is on your mind. Instead, try to structure your story purposefully to make it interesting. By the way, recent studies have shown that men who have the gift of a storyteller are considered by women to be more attractive.

Have 3 Good Stories in Stock

Of course, impromptu is always the most winning option. However, if you are nervous or worried, then a couple of pre-prepared funny stories or anecdotes will become a lifesaver for you.

Listen and be involved

The surest way to interest other people is to show interest in them. This idea was popularized as early as 1936 by Dale Carnegie. He wrote that by being interested in other people, you can make more friends in two months than by trying to attract attention to yourself in two years. Quentin Hardy, journalist and former editor of The New York Times, argues that it is necessary to listen carefully to others, try to empathize with them and try to understand their motives and actions.

Ask the Right Questions

At a party or some kind of event, it is not necessary to talk a lot about yourself in order for people to get the impression that you are an interesting person. Instead, it makes sense to engage others in a conversation about their lifestyle. At the same time, ask thoughtful questions as needed. Listen carefully to the answers. Surely by the end of the evening your interlocutors will consider you one of the most interesting people among their acquaintances.

So, according to journalist Evan Ratliff, you should not be shy to ask simple questions. There's no point in pretending you know something when you really don't.

Speak what you think

If people do not express their attitude to the subject of discussion, their interlocutors do not like it. So, it may seem to them that you are either not able to keep up the conversation, or you are simply not at all interested in its topic and the people around you. Therefore, do not be afraid to express your point of view, even if it seems to you that someone may not like it.

Follow your interests

Instead of gathering information about things you don't care about, focus on the areas that really interest you. In this case, when telling someone about them, you will look natural and lively, which will certainly make you more attractive in the eyes of the interlocutor.

Read more

If you have the time and money to travel the world, then that's just great! But even if you do not have such an opportunity, you can still learn a lot about different cultures and historical periods by reading about them. Books, blogs, magazines and newspapers - get more out of them new information and ideas. According to the results of a study examining psychological effects from reading fiction, it turned out that people who read a lot better understand other people. In addition, from books you can draw a lot of ideas and stories for discussion.

Show off your sense of humor

This point is very important in relationships with others. Therefore, learn to always see the bright side in everything and make fun of problems and difficulties. As a bonus, we can add that, according to studies, men with good feeling women like humor more.

Spend time with interesting people

As you know, the immediate environment has a tremendous impact on a person. Therefore, if you are often in the company of boring people, dissatisfied with life or serious people you will soon be just like them. The same rule works in the opposite case. So, if you often communicate with interesting people, then it will have an extremely positive effect on you. Where can you find such a company? If you cannot single out someone from among your friends or acquaintances, then contact social networks. Today, many groups have been created where people are united by similar interests and goals.

Make time for one of your interests

Perhaps you are tempted to familiarize yourself with the most different areas learning new things about everything? However, it still makes sense to focus on one thing. Just think how nice it will be to flaunt your knowledge and experience in some area of ​​interest to you! If you share information with others about a topic that really interests you, you will surely be able to infect them with your enthusiasm, which will present you in a more favorable light.

Attend an improvisation class

Comedian Bill Connolly believes it helps improve communication skills in Everyday life. As you practice, you will focus on what the other person is saying and build your next sentences based on that. Moreover, even if you are shy and do not plan to speak in public, such improvisations will allow you to relax, teach you to think and react faster, and also feel more comfortable when you find yourself in a particular situation.

Stand out from the crowd

Surely you have something that distinguishes you from others. So, it can be an experience related to living in another country or working in an art gallery and communicating with famous people, or if you grew up in a family with 10 children. Don't be afraid to share this with other people. This will show your originality.

Accept your weirdness

We all have quirks. It is part of the human being. You shouldn't be ashamed of it. After all, if you always behave the same way as other people, it will be very boring.

open up to people

Feel free to share your opinions and interests with others. After all, if you keep silent all the time, then no one will know about how amazing person you are really.

Try changing your social circle

Perhaps you spend time with people who are not capable of appreciating you. In this case, you should try to change the circle of communication.

Friendly relations with others are the key to a calm and successful life. Learn to establish contact with people, and they will repay you with kindness: they will willingly help, pay attention, give in. Here are 10 tips that will make you a person who is pleasant in every way.

1. Always be honest. Honesty means you're not afraid to speak up own opinion and don't play to someone else's tune. They do not want to deal with liars, they are treated with disdain. Do not want to express an opinion? Just keep quiet.

2. Know how to listen. People love to share their experiences and hate to be interrupted. To please others, you need to listen to them, even if the subject of conversation seems trifling and does not interest you at all. Have respect for other people's problems and support with a kind word.

3. Stop imposing your opinion. Everyone thinks that his point of view is the truth in last resort. But in fact, your point of view is not always correct. People don't like being pointed out. A nice person never does that. He is quite diplomatic and avoids sharp corners.

4. Give compliments. They are like jam in a bun or a cherry on a cake. Compliments are flattering to hear. Don't skimp on praise. It's free and helpful. An appropriate compliment flatters a person's self-esteem. But remember that too much praise is worse than none.

5. Smile. A sincere smile demonstrates a friendly attitude, good intentions and good mood. Everyone is subconsciously drawn to smiling merry fellows, because it is calm and comfortable with them.

6. Calmness in moments of anger. Remember Japanese samurai? They remain calm even in the most stressful situation. Try to learn self-control and control over emotions. In society, individuals are valued who live not with naked emotions, but with reason.

7. Live on the bright side. Pessimists are shunned. Bad mood contagious. Frowning people bypass the tenth road. Optimists, on the other hand, know how to cheer up, do not escalate the situation. To become a pleasant person, learn to see the light even in pitch darkness.

8. Recognize that you are not a know-it-all. Do you know how annoying self-confident stubborn people are? There is a plug in each barrel. True, they do not look like enlightened sages, but pompous turkeys. Recognize that you cannot know everything and give advice on everything. A person can be a professional in one narrow area, but no one can know everything. Stop boasting of knowledge, deliberate posturing looks ridiculous.

9. Magic words. You teach children to be polite, but you yourself forget about "thank you" and "please." Politeness indicates to others that you are pleasant and well-mannered person. If you treat people with courtesy and respect, they will treat you favorably and benevolently. Rudeness breeds rudeness.

10. Care. The easiest way to build relationships with others is to take care of them. Congratulate a colleague on his anniversary, help carry bags to an elderly neighbor, visit your parents more often. Believe me, good returns a hundredfold.