Be friendly and confident. When people see these qualities, they find that such a person is much easier to communicate with and more welcoming. If you're still in school, then shaking hands may not be the best way to start a conversation, but for adults, this is a good chance to show your openness. In some countries, traditions do not allow touching people of the opposite sex, so you should pay attention to this and choose a different way to greet a person. But most often it is quite appropriate to shake hands when meeting.
- Don't be afraid to be the first to say hello to strangers.
- Smile.
Watch your posture. Your posture can tell the people around you a lot about your mood and self-confidence. Try not to slouch - this way you give the impression of a closed and insecure loser. Keeping your back straight and standing with your head held high with your hand at hip level will give the impression of a strong, open and self-confident person.
Never fuss. Keep your arms relaxed along your body or place them on your knees. Do not show your own nervousness - no need to bite your nails, pull your hair or wrinkle a napkin in your hands. On the other hand, don't try to look overconfident - people may think you're arrogant and boastful.
Relax. Of course, posture is very important, but you don't have to look like a robot. Sit up straight, but don't stiffen up. They say that animals can feel fear, just as humans can feel your insecurity. Just be yourself. You don't have to go out of your way to impress someone, let your personality speak for itself.
Smile. Especially when you first met a person. Not required to show Hollywood smile A polite, friendly smile will suffice. Try to smile naturally if the smile changes instantly stone expression face, people give the impression of insincerity and falsehood. Try to give your interlocutor the opportunity to say something, most people are annoyed when a person chats continuously, not allowing the interlocutor to insert words.
Look into the eyes of the interlocutor. Try to constantly look at the person you are talking to. Don't get distracted and don't look away, otherwise the person will feel that you are not interested in him. Sometimes, if a person has some kind of problem, such as strabismus, it is better not to focus your gaze on the person's eyes. In this case, it will be more natural to look at the mouth or nose of the interlocutor.
Dress appropriately for the situation. Always be yourself and show your personality. For this, it is not necessary to dress in accordance with the most fashionable trends. You want to impress yourself, so be yourself. Think about the length of the skirt and the depth of the neckline that are acceptable in this situation. It is also important to give Special attention to keep your clothes clean and tidy. Don't forget about accessories - they can tell a lot about you.
Show a sense of humor. A person who goes out of his way to be funny usually achieves the exact opposite goal. People who have good feeling humor, behave naturally and sincerely show their wit. Do not use flat jokes and ambiguous phrases.
Get the person interested. enjoy common sense when choosing a topic for conversation. It is unlikely that a man will impress a woman if he starts talking about how much beer he can drink or describes a recent fight in a bar. Similarly, most men are unlikely to want to listen to a girl talk about what a cute puppy she has in the house, or how she loves to buy new shoes. Remember, you are trying to get the person's attention. Intrigue him, arouse interest in yourself. Here are some good themes for conversation:
- Interesting facts or tips.
- Music and cinema.
- Questions.
- Remember, never speak harshly about other people's beliefs or religious and ethical values.
Let the other person talk about themselves."Tell me what you like to do in free time?" In a conversation with a woman, it would be appropriate to compliment her appearance, for example: "This color suits you so much." If you don't know what to say to a person, never say a compliment just to say something. People will easily recognize your insincerity, and it will offend them.
Find general theme for a conversation. If you are at a party, you can ask the interlocutor if he knows other guests and talk about this topic.
If you came for an interview, it is better to find information about this company in advance. In fact, the more you learn about the enterprise, the better. Try to hide tattoos if you have them. They rarely produce good impression on the management and clients of the company. However, you shouldn't act like this. like you know everything in the world.
If your teeth are bad condition find a way to put them in order. Unhealthy teeth cause disgust. You may need to find overtime work to be able to pay for dental services - unhealthy teeth will ruin any good impression!
- If you have uneven teeth, you need to consult an orthodontist and get braces. Remember to brush your teeth twice a day to keep your breath fresh.
Use perfume with great care. This can say a lot about you. It is important not to overdo it here. You may really like the scent of perfume, but the smell of perfume may be unpleasant or even allergic to other people. With these considerations in mind, it might be better not to use perfume at all. If you still want to apply perfume, it is better to spray it in the air and, after waiting a few seconds, pass through the fragrant cloud.
Take care of hygiene. This is very important, especially for teenagers. These tips may seem obvious, but shower daily and always wear clean, tidy clothes. Remember to brush your teeth twice a day and always use an antiperspirant deodorant, especially if you plan to important meeting which makes you nervous.
- Girls can put some concealer on their face. Do not overuse cosmetics, it looks unattractive. If you're going to a formal event, you can put on some light makeup using lip gloss or lipstick, mascara, and sometimes eyeshadow and eyeliner.
End the conversation on the right note. Let the person want to lay it. Let me understand. that you had a good time and hope to meet the person again. You can even send short message when you get home. Even if people have made a good impression of you. it is important for them to make sure that you also enjoyed communicating with them. It is important for them to get confirmation of this. However, don't be too intrusive!
Be yourself. Do not try to pretend to be someone else, otherwise you will be forced to continue to maintain a false image. Be yourself. this advice may seem trite. but it's true! Never lie to people about yourself and be honest. If people find out that you cheated on them, they will feel bad and are unlikely to forgive you.
Is it correct to say that first impression of a person the most correct? Or vice versa, is the one who says that the first impression is deceptive right? How to produce good first impress and at the same time make correct representation about a human?
Numerous experiments and studies carried out in the West show that the first impression of a person is the most accurate and correct. Experts argue that in order to determine our relationship to to a stranger, determining the degree of its attractiveness, we need up to 4 minutes.
It’s hard to argue here, for the most part we all pay attention to the first impression, and it is this that affects our further perception of a person. If you are one hundred percent trusting your instinct, your intuition, then you will not open up to a person who did not like you at first sight. Therefore, if it is important for you to establish the right connections, strike up an acquaintance with a specific person, pay attention to creating a good first impression.
How to make a first impression
To make a good first impression on specific person, the main thing you need to know is that a person chooses his friends in his own image. That is, whether a person will like you or not depends on the degree of similarity of your characters, interests and outlook on life. Even outward resemblance has an impact on the first impression. Therefore, the moment of adjustment to the interlocutor is important here (you can learn more about what the attachment technique is from the article - “ Ways to manipulate a person»).
Knowing the person in absentia, you can prepare for the meeting. But there are also universal first impression rules, to know and take into account which, in order to present yourself in best light beneficial and beneficial.
Pay attention to appearance
The appearance and image of a person is what we pay attention to first of all.
An important component of the design of appearance is the style of clothing, which is considered as an image of a person's own "I". Assessing the style of a person’s clothing, and making a first impression about him, we pay attention to such features as:
- The neatness of clothes. A poorly dressed person usually evokes sympathy and a desire to help him, while a slovenly and untidy person - rejection and disgust;
- Appropriate clothing for the situation. It is clear that a tracksuit is not suitable for a business meeting, it looks ridiculous and may cause distrust among others. It is just as ridiculous to go to a club in a three-piece suit, or to a dinner party in ripped jeans.
- Compliance with established stereotypes. If you are a representative business world, give preference to a conservative style, but if you are a person of a creative profession, your appearance must speak of independence and individuality.
Assessing the attractiveness of a person, and forming the first impression of him, many pay attention to his face (look, smile, expression). An expressive face that radiates calmness, confidence and goodwill is considered attractive.
Posture plays an important role in the formation of the first impression. Good posture speaks of the confidence and optimism of a person, of his inner strength. Poor posture is a manifestation of low self-esteem, subordination and dependence.
An important factor in the first impression is movement and gestures. What you don't talk about shows up in them. A person feels tense or free by his gait. Gestures, body reaction will give out your temperament and state of mind.
- Open gestures speak of the desire for communication, of psychological openness. They appear in uncrossed and open positions of arms and legs, in a slightly raised head. If the hands are in motion, then these gestures are usually soft, smooth and rounded.
- Closed gestures indicate psychological closeness. They appear in the crossing of arms and legs, in the “lock position”, when the fingers are clenched into a fist. The head is lowered, the look is frowning, the hands can be hidden (under the table, in pockets, behind the back, etc.), all this looks like a defensive position.
Harmony in appearance how do you understand this combination of many various factors. Keep this in mind when establishing contacts with people.
In many ways, the voice is a reflection of a person's character. The way we speak affects our image in the eyes of others. We subconsciously, and even consciously associate the sound of the voice with specific characteristic features personality. Even at moments when we do not see the interlocutor, but only hear him (for example, talking on the phone), we still form some kind of idea about him.
A shrill voice is associated with the hysteria of a person and his imbalance. fast and slurred speech betrays an insecure person. The languor of the voice says that the person is sensual, but cautious. A fool may seem the one whose voice sounds sluggish. On the positive attitude, a sonorous voice indicates cheerfulness. And the voice of some people is so beautiful that you don’t even understand what they are saying.
We get a significant part of the first impression from the rhythm of speech and the timbre of the voice. In addition, analyzing the style and content, it is easy to get an idea of the cultural level of a person. You can also tell by the voice person's life experience about the degree of its development.
Learn to present yourself properly.
People rarely use self-promotion and self-promotion in order to express yourself. But it renders essential role is to make a positive first impression. Self-presentation is the ability to focus the attention of other people on their own obvious merits and put aside your shortcomings. But you should not immediately talk about all your merits and virtues, it is better to try to win the favor of your new acquaintance with eloquence, originality of judgments, wit.
Show genuine interest in the other person
Even Dale Carnegie said that the most significant person for any person is himself. So, when you decide to demonstrate your charm, show a sincere interest in the person with whom you communicate. Ask him a couple of minor questions and be prepared to listen to a detailed answer (this will come in handy ability to listen to the interlocutor), do not interrupt. Show your interest in what he has to say. Be kind, but don't be coy!
Don't be intrusive
Do not rush things, for the first meeting it will be enough to have a neutral - restrained conversation. Do not immediately puzzle a person with requests or offer something. If the interlocutor says to you “Goodbye, it was nice to meet you,” do not insist on continuing the conversation.
Don't lie, only tell the truth
If you don't know the answer to a question being asked, be honest about it. Such frankness makes a good first impression and inspires only respect. Do not ascribe to yourself non-existent qualities and virtues, anyway, in the future you will have to admit that at the first meeting you exaggerated a little.
You won't get a second chance to make a first impression. It doesn't matter whether job interview, business meeting or first date, remember that first impression will remain for a long time, and a long time must pass before new information can change it.
P.S. Each of us has experienced wrong first impressions. It happens that at first people appear before us almost in the guise of an angel, but on examination they turn out to be unworthy. And vice versa, a person who at the beginning did not make a worthy impression on us, in the future becomes best friend. No one is immune from a mistake, but in order to avoid it, a person must be given a second chance, no matter what the first impression of him has been.
P.S.S. People who are accustomed to judging a person by specific cases don't pay much attention to first impressions. This must also be taken into account.
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The first impression of a person is made in 7 seconds. Whether it's a party, a date, a job interview or meeting with business partners, always be fully prepared, because there will be no other chance to make a good first impression.
How to leave a good impression of yourself?
Do you chronically make a bad impression on people or have trouble communicating when you see a person for the first time? It doesn’t matter - in this material we will tell you how to win over any person with whom chance brings you.Others are shy too
Restraint - main reason, according to which acquaintance may not go as you expected. But it works both ways - you have no idea how many people consider themselves shy. In 1995, 40% of respondents surveyed by extras identified themselves as "shy", by 2007 their number had grown to 58%. Remember that most people feel out of place when they are in a room with strangers. 
Down with selfishness
When contemplating first contact, many ask themselves questions: “How to avoid awkward situations? How to turn the situation in your favor? Psychologists advise before the first dialogue with new acquaintances to change this setting to “What can I do for these people?”. Having to think of others first will distract you from your insecurities and defuse the situation.smile
Doctor social psychology from New York University, Peter Mende-Sedlecki proved that people generally trust "friendly" faces and reject "hostile" faces. At the same time, it takes only 34 milliseconds for a person to read facial expressions from the face of the interlocutor and decide whether he is trustworthy. So smile and make eye contact. 
fit the occasion
Each event has its own atmosphere. Before you go somewhere where you will definitely have to communicate with strangers, analyze the nature of the event. This will help you tune in the right way, not to make a mistake with the choice of clothes and topics for conversation. 
Prepare a 7-second story about yourself
You don't have to write your biography from toddler age, just tell a couple of things about yourself: “Hi! I'm Christina, sister of your friend Mitya. I came from Moscow to St. Petersburg this weekend, glad to meet you.” the main objective- help the interlocutor find common ground and start a dialogue (see point 2). “Who do you work for?” – perhaps the most popular question when meeting after the question about the name. Try to interest the interlocutor with your answer and make him delve into the questions. 
Instead of "I'm a realtor" say "I help people find peace and a roof over their heads", instead of "I edit school textbooks"-" I point out the vector of development to the younger generation. Don't be afraid to sound overly pompous, everything can be reduced to a joke after all.
Four magic words
Suppose a conversation about your work took a minute and a half. A start has been made - what to do next? Show interest in the life of the interlocutor: “What about you?”. Find out about his work, hobbies, main activities. Attention is always nice. But you should not pretend to be interested if there is none: you risk being branded a hypocrite in the eyes of another person. 
Use "body language"
You can treat the body language theory in different ways, but you should not deny the influence of non-verbal cues on the impression of a person. If the interlocutor “mirrors” your mannerisms and postures, the speed and rhythm of speech, you unconsciously feel acceptance towards him - “Yes, he is his own on the board! We are similar, and he sympathizes with me. At the same time, mirroring should not be obvious - this can cause rejection. Also watch your posture, facial expressions and gestures: the back should be straight, the face should be friendly, the gestures should be relaxed. 
Wear what you like
Fact: You feel more confident in comfortable clothes. This doesn't mean you have to show up to a business meeting in stretchy sweatpants and a sweatshirt, but don't wear a tight suit or tight, oversized heels. It is important to find a balance between the dress code established at the event and your comfort. 
Compliment with continuation
“Amazing shoes!”, - undoubtedly, your interlocutor will be pleased to hear this. But a much better “investment” for further conversation will be the phrase “Awesome shoes! I have long dreamed of something like this. Where did you get them, if not a secret?Read as much as possible
As a rule, well-read people are excellent conversationalists. Always be aware of the main recent events- from the release of the Blade Runner remake to the armed uprisings in Venezuela. 
Don't wait to be interested
This is a common mistake many introverts make: "Wait until someone starts talking to me." Luck smiles at the fact that it takes the first step. Get in touch first. Smile, stand straight and look straight in the eyes - these are three things that inspire confidence.Talk to outsiders
you see lonely standing man at a lively party? Get to know him! Most likely, he cannot overcome shyness and will be very pleased with your attention. “You look like an interesting person,” says such an act. 
Give all your attention
When talking to a person, do not be distracted by calls, messages and social networks, do not look behind his back in search of acquaintances with whom you would communicate more willingly. It's just plain ugly.Don't be afraid of groups
A group of three or more people is more open to new "members" than two tête-à-tête conversations. A large company rarely talks about something personal, but by intervening in a conversation between two people, you can become a “third wheel”. 
Be sensitive
If you are chatting with friends and you see someone trying to join him, take a half step back and invite him. Both this person and your friends will appreciate the nobility of this gesture. 
End the conversation gracefully
Ending a conversation correctly is no less difficult than starting it. We offer the following scheme:- Interrupt yourself, not the other person.
- Smile. Let them know that it was a pleasure to meet you and that you are grateful for your time.
- “But, I beg your pardon, I need to…” pick up a friend from work, pick up a child from school, have time to go to the store. The main thing is to make it clear that you are ending the conversation on important reason not because you got bored
We hope that these tips will help you feel more confident at any event and not be afraid to make new acquaintances. Below we will talk about how to behave on a date to impress a girl or guy.
How to make a first impression on a girl or a guy?
If you suddenly read these lines in some cozy cafe and an attractive representative of the opposite sex has come into your field of vision, we offer a few tips that will help you smoothly turn an acquaintance into a first date. 
Give me a compliment
But don't overdo it. Think about what good things you can say about him / her so that the words sound sincere. You can compliment clothing or appearance, but it's too predictable. If you have a good sense of humor, don't be afraid to make a joke. Avoid vulgar jokes and hackneyed "tackles" like "I got a call from heaven and they said that their most beautiful angel was missing." 
Take care of your appearance
Alas, the phrase about a meeting on clothes is more relevant than ever. Even if you shine with wit, and with your eloquence plug Cicero into the belt, all your efforts will go down the drain if you are conniving with appearance. 
Watch your manners
Girls really appreciate respectful signs of attention. In no case do not violate her personal space in the first minutes of meeting, but you can hold the door for her, give her a hand in front of the step or treat her with a drink. Do not allow rude and obscene jokes, foul language. You should not wash the bones of others, even if the woman at the next table is munching very unpleasantly. Be polite to everyone around you.Feel confident
Even if a fire is raging inside you, stay calm and confident. In no case do not slouch, do not look from under your brows, do not take closed postures (crossed arms) and do not use insincere gestures (hands to the face, a shifty look). 
Lead the conversation in the right direction
Do not reveal too personal details too soon. Let your first conversation take place within the framework of things that are relevant, but general. Ask more questions than tell about yourself: what your interlocutor does, where he studied, how he likes to spend time, in a word, try to find common interests. Try to avoid awkward pauses: at this moment, both you and your interlocutor feel out of place, and who wants to continue communication on such terms?Don't brag
Nobody likes a braggart, especially a woman. It is not necessary from the first minutes of acquaintance to boast of connections, a highly paid position or a luxurious car. By this you declare yourself as a selfish and mercantile person.a small test to find out what people think of you in the first minute of meeting you. If its results upset you, do not despair - everything is in your hands!
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The first impression is an evaluative perception of the image of a person in the first seconds of acquaintance. The role of the first impression can hardly be overestimated, because they say: "It takes a few seconds to make a first impression, and the rest of your life to correct it."
It takes a fraction of a second for the human brain to form an opinion about the character and abilities of a stranger. As a result of brain scanning, it was found that the emergence of sympathy or antipathy for a stranger at the first impression occurs with little or no participation of the intellect. This process involves the part of the brain responsible for the sensation of fear - the cerebellar amygdala. This is an ancient segment of the brain that formed in animals long before the prefrontal cortex, which contains centers intellectual activity. Therefore, people always judge others by first impressions; it is it that forms the attitude towards another person or phenomenon. Of course, the initial impression may later change (especially if it was not quite the same as we would like), but this will require prolonged personal communication.
What aspects form the first impression? According to psychologists, the first impression of a person depends on 50% of his appearance and manners, 30% on how he speaks, and only 20% on what he says.
The first impression can be formed consciously and unconsciously. Conscious the impression is formed with a special intention to evaluate a person from any position. Unconscious the impression is made subconsciously, automatically, in the absence of special efforts in this regard.
Psychologists distinguish three main first impression factor: attraction factor, superiority factor and attitude factor. These factors operate in close interrelation.
Attractiveness factor means how pleasant and attractive the object of acquaintance is to us. In relation to external attractive person people tend to transfer pleasant external data to inner world and character traits; although it is known that the relationship between facial features and character traits may be minimal or absent altogether.
Physical attractiveness, as shown by numerous studies, produces a "shift" in the assessments of not only the nature of its carrier. Even when a specific act or result of activity is being evaluated, beautiful people often get overestimated by others. in psychology and fiction a lot of evidence has been collected about how the "beauty effect" affects the first impression.
Special efforts and details of appearance that correspond to the socially approved image of the individual are called " signs of attractiveness". For a first impression, they should be well thought out and organized. The result achieved in this case will pay off the efforts spent on creating signs of attractiveness.
Excellence Factor means a subconscious comparison of oneself with a new object of acquaintance. If this object surpasses the perceiver in any parameter, then its other qualities are also evaluated much higher. In other words, there is a general inflated personal assessment.
Attitude Factor means the reaction of a person to the attitude of the object of acquaintance towards him. People who showed sincere attention and benevolence at the first meeting, a person tends to perceive better than they really are. And vice versa, inattention, arrogance, rudeness shown from the first seconds create a negative impression about the object of acquaintance.
Psychologists and image makers identify three main aspect of first impression:
1. Availability, i.e. readiness, disposition to acquaintance. This is evidenced by the look, posture, manners, mood of a person.
2. interest in others, i.e. attention and kindness to others. This is reflected in visual contact, readiness to listen and communicate, in the openness of the posture, the position that a person takes in relation to potential participants in communication.
3. sexual attraction, or the degree of interest that a person arouses in the opposite sex (playfulness of looks, manners and postures, their passivity or aggressiveness, details of clothing, accessories, cosmetics).
Thus, an exceptional role in the first impression is played by the external data of a person. There are also elements that image makers call information indicators(or a factor of personal attraction). The main ones are: physical attractiveness, self-presentation, fashion style and emotional condition.
physical attractiveness has already been presented above. A person is considered attractive pretty face. However, this is due not so much to the beauty of the face itself, but to its expressiveness. If a person’s facial expressions are benevolent, cause location, then in the vast majority of cases he will be perceived positively by others.
Posture plays an important role in the formation of physical attractiveness. Good posture is associated with confidence and dignity, bad posture is perceived as a manifestation of insecurity, and often - dependence and subordination.
self-presentation is the art of presenting oneself to others. The essence of this skill is the ability to focus on one's strengths and avoid weaknesses.
Self-feeding attractiveness- the ability to present yourself to others in a favorable light. Psychologists note that attractiveness is associated not only and not so much with appearance, but with inner charm. After all, there are people who “shine, but do not warm”, and there are people who “attract like a magnet” - it is easy and simple to communicate with such people, they win hearts literally from the first seconds of acquaintance.
self-serve of excellence, or demonstration of their merits in a harmless form for others. For this, it is not necessary to draw parallels and comparisons, because each person is unique in some way. Self-presentation should be based on objective merits and achievements (this is especially true for the managerial profession).
Self-feeding relationship- a sincere, friendly and interested attitude towards the interlocutor. Such a position, as a rule, causes reciprocal sympathy at the first acquaintance.
Fashion style is essential component appearance styling. The choice of clothing style indicates that a person imagines what image of his own "I" and his social status. Clothing should be appropriate for the occasion, position and age of the person. Any discrepancy will cause a negative perception. For example, it is unacceptable to come to serious business negotiations in sportswear.
Emotional condition can greatly influence the formation of the first impression. Powerful emotions provoke the so-called. " psychological contagion”, when the emotions and feelings of one person are projected onto others, causing a response (“mirror effect”). That's why good mood can help create positive first impression.
Special studies by psychologists show that people see what they want to see and hear what they want to hear. In other words, all information coming from outside world, subjectively "sieved" by each person. Such peculiar "filters" depend on education, upbringing, life experience, the character of a person, his lifestyle, environment, value system, etc. Thus, reality and its perception often not only do not coincide, but also differ from each other. Depending on the personality of the perceiver, the words, concepts, texts and actions of another person are interpreted differently.
Based on the patterns of people's perception of each other, it is possible to influence the perceiver, consciously form the desired image in his mind. This is especially true for first impressions.
When a first impression occurs, the following errors occur - the effects of a halo, stereotype, projection, condescension, someone else's opinion, mental state, dominant need, simplification, gala effect, placebo effect, and deliberate deceit. Below they are discussed in more detail.
halo effect lies in the fact that the visual and auditory information received at the time of acquaintance is superimposed on a certain image that has already been created in advance. This halo image makes it hard to see true traits new acquaintance.
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Importance of the First Impression Effect
There is a well-known 90/90 rule when forming a first impression. Its essence is that 90% of the idea of someone is formed in the first 90 seconds of communication.
Forming a first impression is pretty difficult process having psychological structure, dynamics, feedbacks of various kinds.
The psychological essence of the formation of the first impression
If you want to please others, you must talk about what they love and touch, avoid arguing about things they don't care about, rarely ask questions, and never give a reason to think that you are smarter.
F. La Rochefoucauld
Psychological entity First impression formation is interpersonal evaluation. It is connected with the formation of the image of another person with whom Team work or communication. The main task of the assessment is to identify the signs on the basis of which the image of another person will be built. This image largely helps to predict the behavior and sequence of actions.
The most important role in interpersonal evaluation is played by the process of stereotyping. Each person, under the influence of many factors, primarily the experience of interacting with people, forms specific standards-stereotypes of other people. The formation of these standards is most often not realized by a person, but they seriously influence and control the evaluation process.
There are three main groups of stereotypes:
anthropological, emotional-aesthetic and social. Each of them reflects certain features, based on which, in fact, the assessment is carried out.
Anthropological stereotypes associated with the appearance of a person, his image. Social - with his status and occupation. Emotional and aesthetic stereotypes are shaped by own experience experiences, a developed sense of proportion and beauty.
In making a first impression big role plays a psychological setting. For example, if on the eve of the meeting your interlocutor was described to you as smart, decent and charming, then you can be sure that your first impression will be just that.
But this is only on condition that you trust the source of information.
A strong influence on the process of perception of the interlocutor has his nationality. For many, this can significantly either distance the communication partner, or, conversely, the mechanism of assimilation will work and, as a result, there will be a convergence of positions.
The evaluation process has strong influence psychological projection. Practice confirms that during the formation of the first impression there is always a psychological phenomenon of projection, i.e. attributing one's emotions and states to another. For example, if a person has increased anxiety, then from everyone with whom he first deals, he is likely to expect unfriendly actions and a distrustful, suspicious attitude.
Special influence the assessment of others is affected by a state of self-confidence or self-doubt. It has been experimentally established that self-confident people more often evaluate others as benevolent and disposed towards them, while insecure people - on the contrary.
The most important role in the formation of the first impression is played by external data. Here, anthropometric and emotional-aesthetic stereotypes, based on a special kind of informative indicators, often work. The main ones are the following:
1. Physical attractiveness. Indeed, it has been noted that “what is beautiful is also good”, i.e. the effect of beauty is able to attribute to the interlocutor, without any factual basis, exclusively positive features character and moral qualities.
Assessing the attractiveness, special attention is paid to face.
The most important role in the formation of physical attractiveness is played by posture. Good posture is known to be associated with confidence and optimism, as well as inner strength and dignity. Bad posture is perceived as a manifestation of insecurity, and very often - dependence and subordination. All this is very important to consider when establishing contacts with people.
2. Self-presentation. Self-presentation lies in the ability to focus the attention of others on their undoubted merits and in every possible way to divert the attention of partners from shortcomings. This will largely depend on the ability to wield psychological initiative, on wit, expressiveness and a special kind of artistry.
3. Clothing style. The choice of clothing style is usually seen as evidence of what a person is like, what kind of self-image he has. At appraisal of clothing style pay attention to the following features:
a) how appropriate the clothes are for the occasion.
b) how neat the clothes are.
c) how clothes correspond to the established stereotype.
There are fairly stable stereotypes in the perception of clothing style. So, for a representative of the business world (especially high-ranking leaders), a conservative style is preferable. This also applies to details: brands of watches, lighters, ties, etc. For the representatives creative professions individuality and independence are more preferable.
4. Experienced emotional state. Strong emotions provoke psychological contagion; a situation in which the emotions and feelings of one person are able to take over others.
It should not be forgotten that a good first impression is usually made by people who generate inspiration, optimism, and others positive emotions. They are quickly imbued with sympathy and begin to trust, more willingly go towards their proposals and wishes.
In conclusion, readers will probably be interested to learn about a special study that reveals the features of the formation of the first impression and interpersonal assessment among representatives of various professions:
physicists (a type of activity according to Professor Klimov's classification of the type "man - technology"), biologists ("man - nature"), lawyers ("man - man"), artists ("man - images of art"), economists ("man - iconic systems"). Lawyers, then biologists, then economists, and artists coped most precisely with the task of evaluating. Physicists made the greatest number of mistakes. Let us single out only some of the signs on which these specialists relied in their assessment. These data are summarized in Table. one.
Table 1
As can be seen from Table 1, the assessment of lawyers turned out to be the most informative, and this is not accidental, since their activities are more communicative in nature than those of representatives of other professions.
The most exquisite pleasure is to give pleasure to others.
J. La Bruyère
Don't forget the first 10 seconds of communication, which are crucial. Gait, facial expressions, gestures, appearance, manner of speaking - all this is very important for the first impression, and especially in the first 10 seconds of communication. What usually happens in those first 10 seconds of contact?
First, the initial appearance in front of the interlocutor. It is desirable that posture and posture demonstrated your energy and dynamism.
Secondly, the formation of contact with the help look, an appropriate smile and a strong friendly handshake. It is they who inform the partner about your disposition towards him, about self-confidence and openness in relationships.
The third component of the first impression is voice intonation, which should be friendly and expressive.
Your decisiveness and confidence performance largely determine how a partner will contact you.
Take care of your own image, starting with clothes.
Image care starts with business man from taking care of the body and clothes: from the head (always well and neatly combed) to the feet (always in good condition and in clean (!) shoes).
Speaking about the role and significance of clothing in the formation of the first impression, one should not forget about the main thing - what exactly upbringing, intelligence and good manners able to win people over at first sight.
Connect with your partner with a glance. A special role in the beginning of communication is given to the first glance. The first moment when the partners meet and greet each other is accompanied by the first eye-to-eye look. Our conscious perception of another person always occurs through direct eye contact.
An experienced interlocutor always strives to greet his partner with an open look into his eyes. And later, in a conversation, often looks into the eyes of the interlocutor to emphasize the meaning of his words. You should also not forget that:
The look contributes to suggestion in the same way as words;
Interrupt eye contact when talking for a long time, it can lead to the termination of the conversation;
When one partner is speaking, the experienced listener does not
allows a duel with the eyes, as this can give rise to aggressiveness.
Use the language of sight correctly. It is no coincidence that they say that the eyes are a mirror. human soul. gaze language
able to say a lot, or rather, about the true feelings of your interlocutor.
