Love yourself is a must. There are special exercises, with which you can learn to love yourself.

But before moving on to the exercises, I will give a few signs that clearly indicate about the lack of self-love.

Signs of self-loathing:

1. Man often feels guilty, and regardless of whether there is a reason or not.
2. Periodically, thoughts arise in my head about my own imperfection, about shortcomings, bad luck, and so on. If he notices that strangers are paying attention to him or hears someone laughing nearby, then the first thing he thinks about is a person with a lack of self-love so it's about something wrong with him.
3. Often trying to justify even in response to compliments.
4. Stiff movements, stooped back and sad expression. As a rule, in such people the corners of the eyes, mouth and eyebrows are lowered down.
5. Man inclined complain about life, that everything is wrong, that he cannot change anything, it is not in his power and strength.
6. Often remembers his failures, unpleasant situations, playing them in memory again and again, telling others about them. For example, about how you didn’t pass the interview for the desired position, about a major quarrel with a relative, about a divorce or parting with a loved one, etc.
7. Seeing his reflection, pays attention mainly for your own shortcomings and not on merit.

Perhaps enough. Someone can see all the above signs, someone will agree that he has one or two of the above, someone will find a little more ... Of course, the fewer such "signals", the better. But if they are, then this is an occasion to think and reconsider your attitude towards yourself. Maybe you dislike yourself a little?

10 reasons to love yourself:

1. If you do not love yourself, then how can you expect others to love you.
2. No matter how you look, no matter how people think you are, you are the only and unique creation of the universe here and now, such as you do not exist anywhere else. Even if you have a twin sister or brother, you still worry various events and treat them from your point of view and get your own experience, which means that you cannot be similar - you are a jewel that denies itself a worthy frame.
3. No matter how you consider yourself, you are an integral part of this life and perhaps only you have the opportunity to change your life for the better, in a word, look or deed.
4. Only by experiencing love for yourself, you can give it to another. After all, it is impossible to give something without knowing what it is.
5. Self-love is the first step towards inner and outer harmony in your life.
6. By showing love for yourself and your body, you do not give a chance to diseases and sorrows to break your spirit.
7. Loving yourself, you love the life you live, which means that the same wonderful people are attracted to you.
8. Self-love is the ability to create and create something for the life around you.
9. When you love yourself, you will discover your true self.
10. Having fallen in love with yourself, you will open the world that passed by you and become a part of life that you did not notice. And most importantly, you will finally begin to live, and not exist.

How to love yourself:

Now is the time to move on to exercises to help you love yourself:

1. Praise yourself

Praise yourself as often as possible. Praise for a deliciously cooked breakfast, for not smoking a cigarette, for walking up the stairs instead of using the elevator, for being able to call this harmful client, for a job well done ... Not pleasant moments skip past, do not dwell on them, but if there is something to praise yourself for (and there are always such things), be sure to do it. Remember actions worthy of praise and praise yourself again. You can give yourself five minutes before bed, and during this time remember all the good things of the day and praise yourself.

2. Give yourself gifts

Are you sad, in a bad mood, are you nervous, are you stressed? Give yourself a gift! Treat yourself to something you love. It could be going to the movies, a delicious lunch, new clothes or shoes, reading an interesting site, a cup of coffee… Just think: what would you like? And give yourself such a gift! Just be sure to treat it as a gift. Think about giving yourself something nice right now. Do we give gifts to those we love? And it gives them pleasure. So why not give yourself a gift? After all, we love ourselves too, we also need to please ourselves.

3. Talk to your reflection

Every day five to ten minutes spend conversations with your reflection. To do this, it is better to use a large mirror in which you can see your entire reflection. Position yourself in front of a mirror and refer to your reflection by name, select the appeal that you are most pleased to hear in your address because you are talking to yourself. Tell yourself that you wonderful person, say everything that you would like to hear from others. speak only nice things do not criticize! You don't want to be criticized, do you?

Do this exercise every day for a month and you will see positive results. Most likely, they will appear even earlier, literally in a week or two.

Another version of the exercise with a mirror is suitable for those who have complexes about their figure or appearance. Choose the part of the body that you dislike the most and that, in your opinion, causes most of the problems in your life. Now imagine that this part of the body is perfect and start praising it, complimenting it. And do this every time you see your reflection in a mirror, a shop window, a supermarket door. At home, you can speak out loud, and in crowded places it is enough to admire yourself and this part of the body mentally. Smile at your reflection.

After doing these exercises your life will begin change for the better. And this is not surprising, because you start loving yourself, which means that others also change their attitude towards you, you start attract positive events, because your thoughts gradually are getting happier.

Love yourself and be loved!

An individual is truly happy if he is loved and loves someone. True, not everyone manages to live in harmony with themselves and with others. Many people suffer from misunderstanding, humiliation, dislike, but cannot realize the causes of their misfortunes. It turns out that the individual himself “programs” the people around him for bad attitude to yourself. The source of the problem is dislike for one's own person. If a person wants to change, he should love himself and become a different person.

Individuals who do not love themselves can hardly count on the respect of others. People feel the inner mood of each other. There is a saying: what you radiate is what you receive. If a person is not filled with spiritual content, he is not only disliked by himself, but also unsympathetic to other members of society.

Women like no one else need constant love and respect. After all, they live with feelings, and the adoration of others inspires them to act. Representatives fair half humanity needs to be beloved wives, girlfriends, mothers. Only love gives them a stimulus and is a source of inexhaustible energy. Women who do not receive love lose interest in life, become depressed, slowly fade. However, it is very easy to solve their problem - follow this psychological attitude will change their lives and the attitude of the people around them.

If a person is unloved, then he is usually jealous and very envious. These negative qualities character poison his life. You cannot be happy without love. It is necessary to live in harmony with the environment and with oneself.

How does an individual who loves and is loved behave:

• takes care of his appearance;
• likes others, knows how to build friendly relations with everyone;
• always kind, helps others;
• easily finds mutual language with people;
• knows how to take risks, actively and boldly acts;
• has a beloved partner, family, children;
• successful in business;
• does not have bad habits;
• constantly realizes itself in various fields public life.

1. Actions that make a person despise himself.

Not everyone manages to behave correctly in a difficult situation. Nobody is immune from mistakes. Sometimes people torment themselves because they cannot forgive themselves for their wrong actions. You can’t blame yourself for mistakes, because they are lessons through which people learn to live and understand life.

1. Inconsistency with the imagined image.

A person wants to behave in any situation correctly and look like a hero from a favorite book. Not everyone manages to live up to the ideal. Life is full of problems, they cannot be solved without compromising one's own conscience. And outwardly, being like a star from the cover of a magazine is an unforgivable stupidity. After all, each person is interesting in individuality.

1. Everyday difficulties.

People who face many problems every day cannot have a positive attitude towards the world and towards themselves. They see everything as black. True, they do not even realize that the way out of a difficult situation lies in the plane of their attitude towards themselves.

1. Failure of plans.

Sometimes a person works long and hard to achieve the desired result. It's not always possible to be the best and get what you deserve. Failures "knock down" people. If a person fails, he stops loving himself.

What is self love and how is it formed?

Before learning to love yourself, it is advisable to understand what love is and under the influence of what circumstances it is born. Self-love is understanding your essence and accepting all your shortcomings. The individual must know what he wants from life, why he lives. It is important to be aware of the reasons for your behavior, to accept without reproach your strong and weak sides character. To love yourself is to constantly rejoice in your victories.

Love originates in the heart of a person, and manifests itself in his actions. A child sees that his parents adore him if he hears approval and praise addressed to him. Adult man shows his love with beautiful words and deeds.

If an individual loves, then he acts. Love requires proof. This is wonderful feeling born out of care careful attitude, self-sacrifice.

Is self love selfish?

Many people think that loving yourself is unforgivable selfishness. This remark is incorrect. There is a difference between love and selfishness. To love means to sacrifice something for the sake of others, to be realized not to the detriment of the interests of loved ones. Selfishness is when a person is obsessed with his own needs, and for the sake of his goals, he neglects the desires of other people.

Self love cannot be selfish. After all, it is completely spent on making the life of relatives happier. A loving individual cares not only about himself, but also about others. A real feeling, without a shadow of obsession and selfishness, always attracts reciprocity. The egoist pushes people away from him, especially if he does not need them.

How to love yourself: 5 steps towards yourself and simple rules for every day

If a person suffers from low self-esteem and feels that he is not attractive to others, he needs to learn to love himself. It is very easy to do this. You need to work on yourself and change a little.

1. Every day pay attention to your appearance, take care of yourself.
2. To find interesting activity to realize themselves in society.
3. Believe in yourself, don't give up difficult situations.
4. Solve problems on your own.
5. Lead an active lifestyle, play your favorite sport.

If a person wants to love himself, he needs to become an interesting person. It is not enough to look good, although this is important for raising self-esteem. An individual must fill his life with something interesting, find something to his liking. Can't close in four walls or in the circle of their endless problems. It is necessary to destroy the barrier that prevents you from seeing and feeling the world. A person should receive well-deserved praise and respect from others.

Simple rules for every day to help increase self-esteem:

• train yourself to smile every day;
• find in your character and appearance pleasant features and focus on them;
• write an action plan for the day, and sum up in the evening;
• update your wardrobe, get rid of old-fashioned things;
• finish what you started;
• do not be afraid to look or act outside the box;
• learn to stop the flow of negative thoughts, think only about the good;
• watch your appearance, if necessary, change your hairstyle, lose weight, sign up for a gym;
• always keep your posture correct, do not slouch, do not lower your head;
• rest more;
• please your body with cosmetic procedures, sauna, massage;
• walk around the room naked once a week - this will get rid of many complexes;
• learn to accept compliments;
• do not judge yourself strictly for mistakes;
• always stand up for your rights;
• never talk about your shortcomings with friends;
• do not silently accept a bad attitude towards yourself;
• read more, watch interesting programs, go to theaters, restaurants, cafes;
• create with my own hands- draw, cook, sew clothes, make furniture;
• watch your speech, do not allow negative statements;
• meet more often, communicate more;
• do not compare yourself with anyone;
• do not put others on pedestals;
• compliment people, give gifts to loved ones.

If a person wants to tune in a positive way, he must think positively. All thoughts are material. Words and phrases spoken by the individual in context unpleasant conversation, subsequently affect its internal state. Saying special words, giving commands to the subconscious, after a quarrel or showdown, you can return yourself to a positive direction. Such phrases are called affirmations.

Affirmation to normalize mood:

“I am calm and nothing will unbalance me. I accept life and people as they are. I love this world. I only think positively. I have the strength to deal with any problem. It is easy for me to overcome any troubles. I don't take offense at anyone. The deeper I breathe, the more energy I have. I feel great. I am happy and calm. I have everything in my life. I love myself and the people around me."

Books on the topic "How to start loving yourself?"

Many people want to change and make their lives a little better. True, one desire is not enough. You need to know what actions to take, what to do in order to become a happy and beloved person. Knowledge about the self-development of an individual can be gleaned from books on personality psychology. To find psychological literature on the topic "How to love yourself" on the Internet or in bookstores. Thanks to books on self-development, people will learn to understand themselves, their thoughts, desires, and analyze their own actions. With understanding and acceptance of one's "I" comes self-love.

How to love yourself - interesting books on psychology:

• Louise Hay "Album of healing affirmations";
• Litvak M. E. "If you want to be happy";
• Loretta Breuning "Hormones of happiness";
• Ann Lamotte "Small Victories";
• Alice Muir "Self Confidence";
• Labkovsky M. "Love yourself with any appearance";
• Kurpatov A.V. “12 non-trivial solutions. Find peace in your soul."

most famous book, which has helped many people become happy, is recognized as a bestseller by Dale Carnegie "How to Stop Worrying and Start Living". In this work, the author gives readers valuable advice who can change lives for the better.

American psychologist recommends getting rid of the painful mistakes of the past in a simple way- to lock in the mind negative thoughts behind the iron door. You can not torment yourself with what has already been done and cannot be corrected. Faced with difficult situation threatening big troubles, it is desirable to present the denouement in black tones. If the individual comes to terms with the thought of a possible loss, it will be easier for him to accept reality.

Whatever the problems, one should not exaggerate their significance and worry too much. In the end, the worst thing that a person can expect is death, but it is inevitable. Fight anxiety and anxiety with positive thoughts. Thinking about the good, the individual develops such an attitude that brings him only joy and happiness.

Dale Carnegie recommends that all people who want to get rid of anxiety, something to do. If you are constantly idle, it is impossible to distract yourself from negative thoughts. A hobby, a favorite hobby, a useful thing will help get rid of depression.

It is desirable to get rid of bad habits. True, this is not so easy to do. The author of How to Stop Worrying and Start Living recommends replacing bad habits to useful ones. Instead of smoking, you can, for example, train yourself to do squats or eat an apple.

Why is it so important to stop worrying about trifles? As a rule, low self-esteem and self-dislike suffer too vulnerable and sensitive people. Their uncertainty about own forces is a derivative bad mood. internal state suspicious person is associated with various unrest and unsupported fears. It is advisable to turn your attention to other people or favourite hobby in order not to worry about trifles and not to torment yourself with far-fetched problems, The main thing in gaining self-confidence is daily labor above own shortcomings. If you do nothing, you will not be able to change your life.

If a person wants to become happy and gain the respect and love of others, but he cannot do it on his own, you need to seek help from a practicing psychologist-hypnologist

1. All it takes to have love is to be love.
2. Love does not require conditions.
3. This experience is absolute and perfect.

Let us examine in detail the question of how to develop self-love.

What is this term often confused with?

This concept has nothing to do with narcissism!

True self love is a natural and modest sense of self that you accept in yourself.

There is no pressure or effort involved.

Having this feeling:

• you are in harmony with yourself;
• you walk the world easily;
• feel confident in any situation;
• respect everything you do and everything you say.

It's such a down to earth and natural feeling.

Let's figure out where to start in order to love yourself completely and completely. Consider all 19 ways.

1. Realize that no one and nothing external will complete you, you are already self-sufficient

2. Accept yourself completely

Accept yourself the way you are

Love yourself in any manifestation and expression, in any verbal and non-verbal expression.

1. Love all your mistakes you made in the past.
   This is important because people often judge themselves, hate themselves and despise themselves for the things that have been done in the past.
2. At that moment in time and with that knowledge, that action was the most correct for you. Realize that you did those actions in the past that led to mistakes, because you thought at that moment that they would be the most correct for you.
   Of course, then you admit the mistake, but you love yourself with these mistakes and accept them.
3. Thanks to your mistakes, you are where you are now..
   They made you stronger and stronger. Implement this knowledge and no longer worry about how to learn to love and respect yourself.

When you no longer associate the word “acceptance” with weakness, you begin to live with ease and calmness that you have never seen before.

Accept all your flaws and love yourself with them: there is what is

Mantra for all occasions: “There is what is. And that's okay."

Example. I screwed up in front of people yesterday, I couldn't make a presentation and didn't prepare.

There is what is, and that's okay.

Use this phrase like practical advice about how to love yourself and stop self-flagellation.

What is the fine line which many people forget:

• This does not mean that you have now resigned yourself to the fact that you are a dull and boring creature and now you are always lying on the couch and doing nothing! No.
• Are you still longing to be best version myself.
• You just don't judge yourself for your shortcomings.

3. You don't need a reason to love yourself.

You are self-sufficient and should love yourself for no reason.

If you are looking for reasons to love yourself, then love will not be complete and complete, and doubts and reasons for the opposite immediately appear in your head. You don't need a reason.

As soon as you start thinking: “I love myself because…”, there are immediately reasons not to love yourself!

If you are looking for reasons to love yourself, you find reasons to doubt!

You love yourself, period. Without a reason.

You are already self-sufficient and there is no reason to be otherwise.

Thanks to this realization, you will know everything about how to love yourself and increase self-esteem for a woman or a man.

4. Stop putting people on pedestals and realize that everyone is equal

No one is better or worse than you.

Stop comparing yourself to other people and undermine your self-esteem.

Otherwise, you will get into an endless race with yourself and you will never solve your questions about how to love yourself and be a self-confident person.

Get out from under the influence of social programming. Be aware that.

Make a choice and allow yourself to be equal with everyone and experience inner lightness.

5. Never compare yourself to others

Comparing oneself to others always causes a feeling of lack of self-sufficiency and condemnation of oneself.

Never chase after others and do not strive to be what you are not!

Example. You look at your neighbor, how he lives successfully and how his business is flourishing, you compare it with your state of affairs, and you upset yourself and are loaded because of this comparison.

Comparing yourself to others gets in the way of self-acceptance.

You cannot be what you are not. You can't live someone else's life. No matter how hard you try, you'll be able to be a cheaper, duller version of the person you're chasing!

The best thing you can do is be yourself.

Don't try to be what you are not. Don't try to be like everyone else.

Be yourself and go beyond your limits, expand your comfort zone.

It often happens that unconscious girls compare themselves with each other. And as a result, then they are always competing with someone. It's like an endless wheel of suffering and chasing.

With this type of thinking, women's questions about how to love themselves and increase self-esteem in the psychology of perception will forever remain open.

With whom can you compare yourself?

The only person you should compare yourself to it's you yourself!

For example, what were you like yesterday and what are you today.

A fine line. Try to compare yourself to yourself NOT about results achieved, but with regards to the new knowledge and understanding.

Ask yourself these questions daily:

• What have I become wiser than yesterday and what have I learned new?
• What lessons have I learned from today?
• Am I out of my comfort zone today?

Only such a comparison with oneself has a place to be.

If the answer is no, then you remind yourself of what you need to work on and where to strive.

6. Respect your body and your mind

Consider the sixth advice of a psychologist on how to love yourself.

Respect your body and mind means you love yourself as spiritual man capable of thinking and being conscious, and you love your healthy body and follow him.

Respecting your body means living a healthy lifestyle

How to respect your body:

1. Avoid alcohol, cigarettes and other harmful substances. You must love your body, and love for it is expressed by the fact that you do not stuff it with harmful smelling, alcoholic, inhaling things and do not undermine its health.
2. Develop your body, go to the gym. Feel the pain of muscle growth when it comes to understanding that the muscles are using their full potential and you are using them correctly. It's fine.
3. These feelings of developing the muscles of the body and eating the right food give you more confidence and lightness in the body. Appreciate your body for it.

People get drunk and live their lives this way because they hate themselves and don't know anything about how to learn to love and appreciate themselves.

Respect your mind and consciousness, do not stuff it with false information

What does this mean and how should it be implemented:

1. You don't have to watch trash on TV.
2. You need to think positively, have clear and distinct thoughts. Have pure thoughts. And then you will close your questions about .
3. You remove all negative thoughts that only hinder progress.
4. You need to develop your mind, explore new concepts, ideas, topics, look for better solutions.
5. Let your mind rest.
6. Meditate. You can read more about .
7. Show him that you respect him.

The implementation of these principles will be one of the main trump cards that close the question of how to start loving yourself.

7. Remove the negative grumpy granny in yourself, judging other people and yourself

Why you need to stop judging others and yourself

This will also be the main advice of a psychologist on how to love yourself for a woman after 50 or an elderly man.

But, alas, this bad habit is also found among the younger generation.

An example of how judging others limits you

1. For example, a man sings songs on the street with an accordion.
2. And you and your friend go through and start throwing mud at him: “Here, Chaliapin was found, there is no voice, there is nothing to do, let him go to the circus,” etc.
3. There comes a time when you already have to speak to people on the street and sing a song. But you begin to shake, you are tense and confidence is lost somewhere.
4. It is this grouchy grandmother, judging others, that limits you in your actions.
5. Never judge anyone. Both yourself and others.

The only thing you can blame yourself:

• Have I done my best?
• Did I do everything I could to get better?

8. If you don’t like something, then don’t endure it, act

You can verbally tell the person that you don't like it, or use facial expressions and gestures to show that you do not approve of it.

From childhood, your mother taught you to endure difficult situations and let them be.

It was the same at school. No need to be patient!

These are not necessarily words, they can be actions that stop what you do not like.

Example: The man smokes in the car. And you can't stand cigarette smoke and have never smoked. You immediately look for solutions to an unpleasant situation for you and say it out loud.

• I suggest that the person get out of the car and smoke on the sidelines.
• I'm talking about the fact that I can't stand the smell of cigarettes and I'm allergic.
• I say that we will not be able to communicate with him until he stops smoking.

Implement this psychological technique and it will become easier to love yourself.

The more you solve unpleasant situations for you, the more love and respect for yourself will appear.

9. Have personal boundaries: what you accept in people and what you don't

Why is it important to have personal boundaries :

Example.

• I don't like it when a man sits on my neck.
• I do not like gossips, liars and hypocrites.
• Etc.

Also write your preferences what you value and respect in people.

This way you will know what you want. You will know clear answers to questions from psychology about how to love and respect yourself.

10. When you achieve your goals, reward yourself in every possible way: for example, buy yourself sweets.

If you set a goal for yourself and realized it, please yourself with pleasant things.

How it helps you further:

• Thus, unconsciously, you reinforce in your head that achieving goals is doubly pleasant and tastier.
• There is more energy to achieve the goal.
• Buying something for yourself, rewarding yourself for the result - emphasizes it, causes natural love for yourself for the efforts and efforts made.

For example, I like to buy sweets for myself: chocolates, cake. To whom to taste. It's always nice.

Implement this and you will no longer need the advice of a psychologist on how to start loving and respecting yourself.

11. Don't whine or let whiners cry into your waistcoat.

You are not a sponge and not a vest in which you can cry! Make it clear to everyone around you.

When you yourself whine next to people for life and for people, you just show them that they can also do the same to you.

Whining does not solve the problem in any way!

You don’t want to love a whiner, you want to love a strong personality!

How to stop whiners:

1. If the person next to you whines and complains about life, on people, pours out his soul to you and cries, ask him: “How will you solve your problem?”.
2. If he keeps whining, then he's not going to solve anything.. This means that a person just wants to feel needed for you, pour out his soul to you, feel your empathy.
3. Ask yourself: “Why do you need such people?”. Get rid of the whiners without a doubt, and you will already feel how you began to love yourself more for it.
4. Get the whiners out of your social circle , and around you there will be a strong and healthy ecosystem of emotions and only strong personalities near. No whiner will drag you down.

12. You create all situations yourself: take responsibility for yourself and your actions

How to learn it with a piece of paper and a pen

Apply this effective method from psychology on the topic of how to learn to love yourself, in practice.

An example with a situation where a man had a fight with a man on the street

How did the person bring the situation to this point:

• I myself behaved too aggressively and emotionally.
• I myself called names and provoked a man.
• I could just leave at any moment.
• I was looking for my own adventure.
• I pushed the man first.
• I myself attracted the negative that I had been accumulating for a long time.

13. Know your strengths and unique values, write them down and remember them.

Know exactly what value you have, what attractive characteristics and qualities.

If you don't know this, you won't be able to develop self-love and dealing with people will be harder.

For example, it's great if while communicating with people, you, without even straining, bring such things as:

Whoever you are you already have value, if only because you are unique.

Write down your unique qualities in writing and remember them. This will help to cope with restless thoughts about how to learn to love yourself as a woman or a man.

Answer the following questions in writing:

1. What makes your personality attractive?
2. What are your hobbies, interests, hobbies?
3. What sensations do you give to people who are in your environment without trying and without making an effort?
4. How deeply can you express your interesting personality when interacting with other people?
5. How independent and free are you on the inside?

Values different people various. As your personality develops, your values ​​may change.

Video on how to increase objective self-esteem

14. Trust yourself and your intentions more, act according to your desires

1. Say what you want.
2. If what you do comes from good intentions, trust them, do it and realize them!
3. Whatever your desires and intentions, act according to them.

Don't be afraid to show yourself what others don't want you to see! Because this is your life and you live for yourself, and not for others!

The more you trust yourself and act on your desires, the more you live the life you want.

Examples of how people limit themselves in life because of the opinions of others:

• Some people do not want to fully express themselves and their personality because they are afraid of offending other people.
• Some people don't want to dance because they're afraid of getting looks of disapproval or bringing smiles to the faces of others.

You can read an article on how to ignore other people's opinions and get rid of shyness.

15. Be more interested in yourself, do introspection, strive to be your best self

How to learn to love yourself and be a confident person

Stick to these principles, and you will no longer worry about how to learn to love life and yourself.

Ask yourself the following questions:

• What are your passions in this life?
• What excites and excites you?
• What kind of humor do you like?
• What kind of music do you like?

16. Set yourself a big goal that will excite and keep you awake, and realize it

1. Set yourself a goal that will excite you and keep you awake!
   Live this dream and make it a reality every day.
2. The more you set a goal for yourself, the more energy you have in your body to implement it and make it a reality.
3. If the goal is low and petty, then there will be so much energy.
4. Thus, on the way to big goal you will live interesting life , there will be respect for yourself and a feeling that you are growing, and not standing still.

Remember the importance of the goal and you will close your questions about how to learn to love yourself and become an interesting person.

17. It's Important to Love Other People: Don't Try to Change Them

It is important to love and accept people for who they are.

Be aware of these principles, reread them occasionally, and don't worry about how to love yourself and other people too.

18. You don't have to be a super perfect person.

Our society, mass media and television inspire perfectionism and the desire to be super-ideal and correct.

Allegedly, you should have an ideal body, education.

In fact, no one wants to be perfect and correct!

Replace this desire with the desire to fully accept and love yourself in any manifestation and expression.

People want to be themselves.

Allow yourself and others to be who they are.

In this way, you will know everything about how to accept yourself and love.

19. Do not forget to respect yourself and just look neat

Enough to conform to your idea of ​​what is normal

To be in pretentious cool places, it is absolutely not necessary to have super expensive clothes.

To do this, it is enough to look appropriate to your idea of ​​\u200b\u200bwhat is normal.

Well, it is desirable, of course, to find out in advance about the requirements of the institution and comply with them. If there are no special requirements, then there is no need to comply with anything.

• It is very stupid to advise a person to always think positively.. This is tantamount to keeping in mind and forcibly clinging to some thoughts.
• Any condition is temporary and impermanent.. For all people, the state changes and there is no point in forcing a person to depend on the state and constantly chase after it.
• This does not mean that now you can be a vile evil grandmother. No.
• You gotta love yourself no matter what state you're in. Be congruent with yourself and love yourself in any manifestation.

This is where all the advice ends. Now you know everything about how to love yourself correctly and correctly interpret this concept.

Wise words

Love is the absence of separation and boundaries between people. This is when you are dissolved and see yourself in every person.

Loving all people is much more beautiful than loving yourself alone or just your partner.

How to learn to love yourself in our modern world because it is very important to have a feeling dignity, but, unfortunately, a considerable number of people underestimate their place among others.

What is self love

Love is acceptance without conditions and reservations, with all the pluses and minuses. A person who wants love does not have to prove to others that he is better. To love yourself, you need to be confident in yourself and know your strengths.

So what do you have to do to love yourself?

1. Forgive yourself for wrongdoing. Guilt has a negative effect on a person if it is no longer relevant and has no boundaries. It is worth letting go of all the bad things that have been done. Mistakes are normal. Even if it is no longer possible to fix something, it is still worth letting go and forgiving yourself. This does not mean that you can immediately relax and repeat everything again. With the help of mistakes, you can gain experience and some knowledge, so that later you do not do everything in the same way.
2. Accept yourself. It is necessary to fully accept yourself with what nature has created, to realize your own individuality. All people are unique. At first, this is not at all easy to do, but after this stage it becomes easier to truly love yourself. You need to respect yourself even with all the shortcomings. They are also part of the personality. In every person there is good and bad, but you cannot love only virtues and pluses. This is not true love.
3. Stop depending on the opinions of others. Very often, the opinion of others prevents you from accepting yourself. Yes, the love of others can help hard way, but the most important own opinion about yourself, not someone else's. Love is in the person himself, and not in his relatives, spouse or friends. Stop criticizing yourself. Self-criticism leads to self-destruction. It's one thing to soberly assess your shortcomings, and another thing to smash yourself to smithereens because of them. The result will be the opposite of what is expected.
4. Stop feeling sorry for yourself. Oddly enough, but self-pity also carries only negative. Turning yourself into a “victim” is the wrong approach. It is important to look at yourself correctly and not exaggerate.
5. Try to be better. Despite accepting yourself, it is still worth continuing to improve yourself. Correction of deficiencies will bring good effect. From the realization that he is able to change into better side, and from new virtues a person begins to truly love himself. The most important thing is not to “get sick” with narcissism.
6. Stop comparing yourself to others. This tactic will not lead to anything good, rather the opposite. As mentioned above, all people are different. At the same time, everyone is equal, there are no those who could be better only by definition. It’s one thing to look up to strong personalities, it’s another thing to constantly compare yourself with them and find new flaws in yourself.
7. Stop judging others. Even if they really don't seem that good, it's still not worth criticizing them. This occupation only accumulates negativity and prevents the emergence of love, rather provokes narcissism - "everyone is bad, but I am beautiful." Do not allow inaccuracy in appearance. Appearance also matters. It is necessary not only to love your body, but also to begin to follow it. Appearance can say a lot about a person. As they say, they are greeted by clothes.
8. Start and get them. Let them be petty - for example, do exercises in the morning or learn how to cook a dish according to a new recipe. This will help, over time, increase “requests” and become more stubborn, instill in a person willpower, self-confidence and fighting spirit. And this is a reason to be proud of yourself.
9. Start looking for reasons to be proud of yourself. You cannot compare yourself with others, but you can (and should!) compare yourself with yourself. With yourself yesterday or the day before yesterday. And most importantly, you need to find at least one thing that distinguishes the current version of yourself from the past for the better. This is a reason to be proud of yourself.

• Council the first. Lists. You need to make two lists. In the first, a person writes what he likes about himself. It could be some moral character or external signs, or maybe victories and achievements. In the second - on the contrary, everything is negative. The second list is then torn into small pieces or burned. The "positive" list is memorized. Every three days there must be added a new word.
• Tip two. New and good. Every evening you need to write down on a piece of paper at least a few small victories that happened to a person during the day. It can be a successfully caught cup flying from a shelf. Or beautifully done makeup, which was noted by one of the acquaintances. Or maybe some new positive self-perception or personal achievement. Such lists will help to make sure of your own strengths and capabilities.
• Tip three. Find merit. This tip is about looks. A person stands in front of a mirror and simply looks at himself, naming the pluses in his appearance. It can be silky hair, a beautiful eye color or a nice lip line. Even skin color. Accepting your appearance is also very important.
• Council the fourth. "My!". A person examines his body, from his toes to the ends of his hair, and repeats only one word: "Mine." It should sound joyful, absolutely without negativity, with a sense of satisfaction that this body is really “his”. Even some shortcomings ordinary phenomena- everything should be perceived joyfully. It can be hard at first, but then this exercise helps to treat yourself with sincere love.

All for now.
Sincerely, Vyacheslav.

Psychologists talk a lot and often about the need to love yourself. Experts are convinced that it is necessary for correct formation a full-fledged personality. But what is self love? Perhaps in ensuring a comfortable existence for yourself? But will this not be a manifestation of selfishness in relation to loved ones? There are many different questions that need to be answered.

So how to love yourself and increase self-esteem for a woman? Why do complexes appear? Are they objective? So, let's figure out how to love yourself like that and what are the ways to normalize self-esteem?

Why you need to love yourself

Statistics say that almost half of women are dissatisfied with themselves, their appearance, some character traits or quality of life, which causes many complexes and depression. They do not know how to love and appreciate themselves. How then can a woman expect recognition and understanding from others?

Self-love does not mean neglect of loved ones. This desire to be better, smarter, more beautiful, to succeed in life. It will fill you with self-confidence and confidence in a brighter future.

Often women do not understand this and continue to suffer in silence, considering themselves unlucky and unhappy. However, the ability to love yourself must be learned. This is a daily work that requires patience and perseverance, which will reward you with harmony and peace in own soul. Many do not understand how to love yourself, but the advice of a psychologist will help to cope with this difficult task.

How to learn to love yourself

• Above all, allow yourself to be imperfect.

No one is able to know and be able to do everything, even the most beautiful, rich and famous. Every person makes mistakes in life, maybe irreparable. He forgives them to other people, why can't he forgive himself? You should learn from them so as not to commit in the future, but not be tormented by the thought that nothing can be corrected. We must be able to let go of the past, drawing the necessary conclusions.

• No need to feel sorry for yourself, creating the image of the victim

Pity gives rise to a feeling of helplessness and hopelessness. Even a person deprived of nature, a disabled person can find himself in this life if he has sufficient willpower. Why feel sorry for yourself healthy, pretty and full of energy woman?

• Getting things done is a prerequisite

Unfinished business indicates weakness, defeat, inability to deal with difficulties.

• No need to compare with other people

Every woman is unique in her own way. It is better to compare yourself today with yesterday and celebrate positive changes. Praise yourself more often progress made even the smallest ones. It's even better to write them down. Every day they will increase, and along with this, self-confidence will appear. You only need to celebrate your merits. Everyone has flaws, so don't dwell on them.

• Happy people who do what they love all their lives

Choosing an occupation to her liking, a woman achieves much greater success. They inspire, add self-confidence, remove negative emotions.

Exercises

How to accept yourself as such and what is the technique that helps to love the real you? There are a few simple exercises that should be done daily:

• going to the mirror, you need to praise yourself; initially during training will occur internal stress, but over time it will disappear;
• slouching is a sign of low self-esteem, self-doubt, so every day you need to work on your posture and gait in order to learn how to keep your back straight and your head high.

Woman receives from the outside world mirror reflection those emotions and the attitude that she feels and sends to him. And self-love fills her with joyful, positive feelings. At the same time, self-respect should not be confused with pity or selfishness. After all, there are two types of such feelings.

• Self-admiration is most common when it seems to a person that he is the best.
• The second is based on self-pity and the belief that the whole of life is sheer bad luck and injustice.

Both types of self-esteem are contrary to reality. In order to make it adequate, first of all, it is necessary to recognize this contradiction. How can you love yourself when you are selfish or insecure?! Of course, this is impossible.

Methodology for improving self-esteem

Psychology disposes different methods improving self-esteem. One of them suggests looking at yourself from the outside, as stranger, and find real features that command respect. This requires the following steps.

• You need to sit in silence and remember the pleasant moments of life that cause a feeling of pride in your actions. You should write them down on paper.
• The next step is to write down the memories that left a feeling of embarrassment and shame for their behavior. You should analyze these events and find out their causes. Then you need to forgive yourself for mistakes and not return to them anymore.
• Comparing the results of the two exercises, you need to find golden mean, their real qualities.
• It is necessary to make two more lists: the first will include objects and events that you like, cause positive emotions, and in the second - those that provoke a feeling of irritation.
• You should think about how to remove from your life those phenomena that cause negativity. If this is not possible, you need to change your attitude towards them and not get annoyed because of their presence. It is better to accept these things as inevitable, like rain or snow, which someday will end.
• The first list should be used as an antidepressant that helps improve mood, restore interest in life.

These simple exercises help you fall in love with yourself, and in the future will improve not only mental but also physical health.

Reverse action

The attitude to the world around is important, that is, to those events, people, things and circumstances among which a woman lives. This is a reality that gives joy and sorrow, and we must be grateful for life. After all, there is no other world and never will be. You can not condemn other people: acquaintances, relatives, colleagues. They must be held accountable for their decisions and actions.

If there is something annoying in others, you need to analyze your behavior. It is believed that those character traits that a person condemns in others are present in himself, which is why they hurt him. We must try to correct them in ourselves, or we will have to put up with them in others. Having accepted your shortcomings and stopped constantly criticizing yourself, it is easier to cope with complexes, raise self-esteem.

• smile in response to an insult;
• if money runs out, donate a certain amount to charity;
• Fear can be overcome with laughter.

Thus, by giving kindness and love to the world around you, you can receive in return Moreover the very same.

Relationship with parents

If you look for the origins of self-dislike, you often have to return to your childhood. Usually the reasons lie in the plane of the relationship of parents with daughters and sons. In trying to see their dreams come true through their children, many moms and dads put pressure on them. excessive pressure. Resentment against parents sometimes passes through many years.

To get rid of this destructive emotion, you need to learn to forgive - and your parents, and yourself, and other people. How to learn to accept yourself, your mom and dad the way everyone is? Psychologists suggest doing the following for this.

• If you remember how your mother scolded in childhood, you need to tell her kind and sweet words even if it is difficult at first.
• You have to take care of old relatives. Help will respond with gratitude, and she, in turn, will return with vital energy.
• No need to try to please everyone, including parents and relatives. It's still impossible.
• Help must be selfless. At the same time, you shouldn't let anyone manipulate you. The person himself must determine the amount of his help.

In relations with your parents, you should try to form a positive common memory, it will help you forget and forgive childhood grievances. It is worth trying to open your emotions without blaming anyone. Joint discussion of long-standing grievances will help. If the parents are no longer alive, you should try to reproduce this conversation in your imagination and forgive them.

Think Positive

How to love yourself? To do this, you need to learn to be grateful to yourself and to this world. It is important to find every day a small reason for joy. Gratitude phrases can be written down and read at any convenient time. Thoughts are material, so they should always be positive.

Often women try to push away, drive away those memories that cause pain. They want to get rid of experiences, but sadness and longing return with more greater strength. But these feelings cannot be ignored, they must be experienced in order to then be forced out of the head.

There are several more useful tips that will help you understand how to love yourself as a woman:

• good deeds not only, they will cause a rise vital energy– it can be charity or volunteering;
• do not hold back and hide your emotions, but you should not let them control you;
• no need to carry the flash negative emotion on others - it is better to retire and calm down, let go of the situation;
• one must learn to love from others, to live full life, rejoice interesting book or a movie, laugh at good joke, give gifts, and soon the world will reciprocate;
• you need to try to let go and do something that you always wanted to, for example, go on a trip, or jump with a parachute.

Knowing how to accept yourself, you will be able to learn to love, forgive and see yourself and the world as they are. As a result, you can safely look to the future. It will be beautiful and will give kindness and recognition in return.