Instruction

Remember that self-doubt is determined by the fears lurking in the mind. At the same time, the main one is the fear of how others will perceive your words, actions, appearance, what they will think about you, etc. etc. Knowing the cause of uncertainty, you can deal with it.

You need to do something, and you are unsure of yourself. Imagine that the worst thing that can happen in this situation has already happened. Accept it internally, accept it as a fact. For example, a guy wants to get acquainted with (or vice versa), but is afraid to take the first step - to approach, to say something. Fears: they will laugh at him, he will be denied reciprocity, he will look very stupid.

When you find yourself in this situation, evaluate your fears and accept that all this can happen. Moreover, accept the negative outcome as already accomplished, feel it. Everything has already happened, you have nothing to fear anymore. Therefore, nothing prevents you from approaching and saying the first words.

Use the tactics of small accomplishments. Find small daily challenges for yourself and overcome them. They can be outwardly quite insignificant - to ask someone about something, to do something in front of others. Overcoming your insecurities in small things, you will gradually begin to notice that it is easier for you to communicate with people.

If there is a person in front of you serious task, break it down into a sequence of small actions, and then focus on doing them one at a time. This approach gives good results - you stop seeing the big picture. difficult task, appears instead a large number of small actions, each of which individually does not look so intimidating.

Always remember that the vast majority of people don't care about you. They don't care how you look, what you say, how you behave, etc. etc. If you are walking down the street, looking down and blushing at the mere thought that others are looking at you and might think something negative, relax - they are interested in their own problems and worries, but not you.

Learn to smile. Smiling is a great way to relieve stress. Smile, even if you are in a completely inappropriate mood for this, and you will immediately feel how fears and stiffness go away. The effectiveness of a smile as a means of combating uncertainty, stiffness, and stress is explained purely physiologically: people smile when they feel good and comfortable. Smiling in a situation where you are not up to smiling, you start the mechanism feedback allowing you to relax, feel more confident.

Choose the image of a totem animal, which, in your opinion, is associated with strength, dexterity, and confidence. Then try to feel like him. For example, while walking down the street, imagine yourself as a lion. The lion is the king of the jungle, no one and nothing can resist him. Feel in yourself its strength, calm grace, a certain laziness caused by a sense of your own power. Get into character and you will see that insecurity is gone, it is much easier for you to cope with what causes fear in you.

Self-confidence and self-confidence is not only an active life position but also the key to success in any area of ​​life. Confident women reach the top career ladder, subjugate men and cause admiration from others. There are several ways to develop a sense of self-confidence.

Instruction

The first thing you need to pay attention to is your demeanor. Strong natures move with confident steps, have impeccable posture and "royal" manners. A woman with all her appearance should command respect and admiration. Do not confuse self-confidence and. Pride and indifference to the opinions of others is not a sign of confidence. AT this case I mean a firm life position and focus on achieving your goals.

Second moment - appearance. Many may assume that a confident woman must wear business suits and use the minimum amount makeup. On the one hand, such traits may indicate confidence, but they are not its main features. A mischievous girl in jeans and a simple hairstyle can look much stronger than a strict lady in a pantsuit. The main thing is to present the image to others. If you decide to do an exotic make-up - show with your whole appearance that it is beautiful.

The third point is the attitude towards oneself. Never engage in self-flagellation and self-criticism. Criticizing your appearance and behavior, you only aggravate the situation. Smile at yourself in the mirror, compliment yourself, admire yourself. If you love yourself, then others will change their attitude towards you.

In conversations with others, never hesitate to express your opinion, even if it differs from the point of view of the majority. Play situations in front of a mirror and think about what arguments you can use to convince. Speak to the public more often, do not refuse the opportunity to speak in front of large audience.

Justify yourself to others as little as possible. Even if you make a mistake, don't turn it into a lifelong problem. It is likely that success awaits you in a new business or in a completely different field of activity.

Related videos

Often insecure people try to hide their fear behind a mask of indifference or unruffled calmness. Here are some tips and tricks that will help you feel comfortable in any environment.

Instruction

The simplest things affect our lives. One of these things is a smile. Even if you have Bad mood, try to smile, and the mood will immediately rise. smiling and smiling man looks happy, open, attractive to people and, of course, self-confident.

Fussiness is the first sign of discomfort. To boost your self-confidence, calm down and find a comfortable, relaxed posture. As you learn to express calmness on the outside, you will gradually become calmer on the inside as well.

Fear of direct eye contact betrays an indecisive and insecure person. Therefore, to show your confidence, look the person in the eye when talking, do not try to hide your eyes. This will let him know that he is heard and understood.

Many people start to giggle when nervous, which has nothing to do with healthy laughter. To avoid this, avoid awkward situations. open smile laughter says a lot more about you than inappropriate nervous laughter.

Talk more so you don't feel embarrassed. If you have nothing to say, then ask intellectual questions that can show your attentiveness and professionalism. And these are the qualities of a self-confident person.

In any conversation, sooner or later there comes a moment when questions begin to be asked to you. To increase self-confidence, you need to become a full-fledged participant in the conversation. And this implies goodwill and openness to interlocutors.

Related videos

How difficult it is sometimes for a teenager to assert himself in a team! Only a few become leaders, the rest are content with the role of “middle peasants”, and some, unfortunately, are outcasts. To help teenagers adjust to social environment, correctly position themselves in the team, you need a sense of self-confidence. A few tips will help you work it out.

Pay no attention to any ridicule! After all, there are a lot of reasons for them - for example, funny last name, too small or, conversely, too large growth, features of the figure and build, poor eyesight, unusual hobby etc. etc. The main thing here is not to enter into a skirmish, no matter how insulting it may be. You need to learn to calmly look into the eyes of the offenders and shrug your shoulders indifferently. All! After two or three attempts, the teasers will lose all desire to continue - because they wanted to evoke negative emotions, enjoy the humiliation of the weak. And once the goal, then there is nothing to try.

Don't be afraid to stand out from your peers. An unusual hairstyle, clothes will allow you to be different from everyone else - the main thing is not to overdo it! Non-standard behavior first arouses interest, and then the desire to imitate. It has long been noticed: if, for example, a student at a school during a break does not take part in common games, but steps aside and begins to do his own thing - draw, play a game, etc. - then soon the West class will gather around him. Worth a try!

Look after yourself! An impeccable appearance is the key to a good relationship with others. But it can push people away, for example, bad smell from the mouth, sniffling, the sight of bitten nails, the smell of sweat from the armpits, etc. All this must be controlled! You can even make a special memo - what you need to check in your appearance, and view it before leaving the house.

Keep your head up high. Do not slouch, proudly straighten your shoulders, raise your chin - this is the image! You should learn to look directly into the eyes of the interlocutor when talking. And a charming smile will complete the “royal” look, disarm even negatively minded opponents.

Nothing in life can be achieved without self-confidence. It is faith in yourself that helps you not to retreat and find the strength to move on. Self-confidence is an acquired character trait, not an innate one. It is rare that someone is so lucky that he does not suffer from complexes and, over time, is not disappointed in himself. Self-confidence is formed due to character, personal qualities and hard work on oneself. Therefore, it is up to you how quickly you develop self-confidence.

You will need

• Willpower and desire.

Instruction

Don't forget your successes. Very often, people focus not on their own achievements, but on what they failed to do. Of course, this is not bad if a person wants to correct the situation and achieve what he wants, but when this leads to a decrease in self-esteem and self-confidence, real problems begin. Therefore, as often as possible, remember those successes that you can rightly be proud of, or even better, write them down on a piece of paper and read it in the morning before the start of the working day and at night before bed.

Don't beat yourself up for failures. If you make a mistake, analyze what happened, correct what you can and move on. There is no point in constantly remembering what happened. What was, is gone. It is more important not to repeat your own mistakes and learn to avoid wrong decisions, but you should not be afraid to take responsibility either. Not in the world ideal people.

Don't live in the past. Don't expect everything to change tomorrow. Live today, here and now. The future has not yet arrived, and the past has disappeared over the horizon. If you constantly dream or remember how good it was before, you will not notice how life has gone. Nothing is more demoralizing than postponing your plans for tomorrow.

Appreciate what you have. The greatest happiness of a person is always the ability to enjoy what he has. This is not as easy as it might seem at first glance, but it is necessary for full life. In addition, this will allow you not to make a mistake in choosing what else you would like to receive from this life. After all, sometimes people are chasing what they absolutely do not need.

Don't let anyone humiliate you. Neither loved ones, nor friends, nor relatives have the right to criticize your personal qualities. You can only criticize the actions of others when they directly affect someone's interests. Therefore, do not confuse the desire to help you with advice and gross interference in your life. Although usually advice should be given only to those who ask for it.

note

When communicating with officials, operate with laws, remember your own rights and their duties. As soon as they try to put pressure on you, to declare that they know better what to do, do not get lost, but immediately remind them of their own rights, the rights of a citizen and a person. It is very important to stop their attempts to suppress you and force you to back down in time. And for this, read the laws, because for a skillful conversation with civil servants it is necessary.

Confidence is what defines our whole life. Depending on the degree of confidence of a person, a circle of his acquaintances, friends, the field of activity where he manifests himself, and many other characteristics are formed. But many of us are not yet fully confident in ourselves, so we have not yet been able to achieve everything that we would really want. This article aims to help people suffering from insecurity syndrome overcome their illness.

1. Always think about yourself.

This does not mean that you have to become selfish. This means that you should not think much about other people with whom you have to talk, get acquainted, meet. All conversations must be spontaneous. Therefore, you should not think much about extraneous phenomena. Just do what you want and need to do, and the rest will come into your life on its own.

2. Never despair.

Mistakes happen to everyone. No one can boast of a perfectly clean reputation. But the fact that mistakes teach is indeed true. Therefore, do not be afraid to try yourself in various roles and fields of activity.

3. Be interested in what is happening around you.

Don't lock yourself in. Attend events and meetings that interest you. And do not think about what will happen there and how other participants will react to you. Enjoy the moments and it doesn't matter what others say.

4. Keep in touch with different people.

Never try to escape reality on long time. Yes, it is a fact that sometimes each of us needs time to be alone with ourselves, but when this solitude drags on for weeks, months and even years, then you doom yourself to loneliness.

5. Keep a positive attitude.

Smile at passers-by, say compliments and don't worry about how you will look like, what you will say. Sincerity has always been in fashion, so keep positive energy and give it to those around you.

Many people ask themselves the question: "What to do to become confident?". Self-confidence allows you to feel happy and be successful in any field. There are many ways to become self-confident.

1. Always smile. Always find a reason to be happy. Good mood always allows you to win over people and look confident.

2. Learn to respect and love yourself. A confident person always respects himself and is proud of himself. Don't worry about your shortcomings. Pay more attention to their merits.

3. Stop comparing yourself to other people. Understand that each person is unique and there is no reason to compare yourself to other people. A person who compares himself to other people will always experience feelings of envy and self-doubt.

4. Don't give in to other people's opinions. Never take someone else's opinion seriously. Confident People always have their personal opinion and do not depend on other people's opinions.

5. Don't criticize yourself, praise yourself.. Get rid of the habit of criticizing yourself. Start new habit- Praise yourself all the time. If you begin to praise yourself more often, you will feel self-confidence.

6. Be always calm. People very often turn a small problem into a tragedy. Do not worry too much about some small problem. Understand that any problems can be solved. Look at life easier, and you will feel self-confidence.

7. Choose your environment. You need to have real friends who will support and help you. With real friends, you will feel real self-confidence.

8. Don't be afraid to fail. You don't need to be afraid of mistakes, you need to learn from them. They give us errors valuable lessons. So try to make the most of your mistakes.

Self-improvement is the way to inner harmony and self-confidence. Let's figure out exactly what actions give us this very confidence.

Collect information about yourself

To work on yourself, you need to understand exactly what you are dealing with. The approach in the style of the most charming and attractive, of course, is good, but it still prevents us from seeing shortcomings in ourselves, correcting which, we will become much better. Arm yourself with a pen and a piece of paper and break down your personality into areas of life that are important to you. Maybe you don't know how to listen and because of this you don't develop relationships with people. Maybe you are very impulsive when shopping and therefore cannot get your financial affairs in order. Or maybe you just can’t decide to take life into your own hands and stop living with an eye on the opinions of others, who knows?

There would be a wish

Everything is possible, you just have to want it, including total fight with their shortcomings. Of course, the process is difficult and painstaking, requiring a certain amount of willpower, but if you sincerely decide that it's time to change something, no one will force you to turn off the path you have chosen to improve yourself. There will be moments of weakness, of course, but they will not significant influence on the final result. If you sincerely want to become better, you will succeed.

Give kindness to the world

Negative emotions in relation to ourselves, people around us and the world can significantly spoil our self-esteem, while good relations lifts her up to heaven. Be kinder to people good deeds, even if they are small. For example, donating 100 rubles to an animal shelter or paying for an old woman's purchases in a supermarket is not such a big deal, but very, very important.

Make a "list of rules"

Each person should have their own set of principles. This will help you accept the right decision in a difficult situation, because such a moral sheet will serve as a kind of guiding map for your whole life. By putting personal principles and goals ahead of people and circumstances, you will very soon gain not only self-confidence, but also respect from others.

Speak slowly

It just so happens that the more calmly you speak, the better interlocutor receives the information given to it. Very often politicians and public figures use this feature of our brain to convey some idea or news to the masses. You can also learn to speak more slowly and calmly, and your communication with others will become much more successful.

Watch your posture

In fact, posture is everything. As soon as you turn your shoulders, straighten your back and lift your chin proudly, your whole look and mood are completely transformed, and you look much more confident and attractive than before. Self-confidence depends primarily not on beauty, but on inner feelings.

Constantly improve your competence

Learn every day, every minute, every second. You can choose any one sphere or "grab on top" from each interesting area, not that important. The most important thing is not to stop in your development. The more useful you do for yourself, the more you learn and the better you are, the more confident you are.

Say goodbye to bad habits

If it's too hard for you to stop eating sweets or smoking instantly, start with small steps. For example, get rid of the habit of putting off washing dishes until later. Stop staying up late in front of the TV. Get up every day 5-10 minutes earlier than the day before. These small steps will help you train your willpower and realize that you are, in fact, the only master of your life. This realization gives a great feeling of confidence.

go in for sports

Sport brings up not only strength, but also spirit. Regular exercise will help you get to know yourself and your body, understand "what kind of dough you are made of." Also attending training requires willpower and a certain level of discipline. In addition, they improve the overall appearance, which also increases confidence.

A well-groomed appearance is the result daily work above oneself. And here the girls are divided into two categories. The first works on itself and its appearance, acquires good habits. The second category of girls envies them. Being stylish is not so difficult, for this it is enough to know a few secrets.

Get ready in the evening. Think over your image in the evening. This will keep you from losing morning hours trying to pick the right clothes. The main thing here is to find out the weather for the next day.

Choose your underwear carefully. This is exactly what creates your image. Properly selected underwear helps to emphasize the figure and improve the silhouette.

Choose clothes according to the weather. Stylish girls always dress according to the weather, this allows them to feel comfortable and confident.

Choose the style that suits you. Choose clothes that suit your lifestyle and body type.

Add some bright details. The right accessories will help turn ordinary clothes into festive ones. It can be a scarf, an expensive bag, large earrings or a belt. However, remember that there can not be many accessories, otherwise you risk “overloading” the image.

Change at home. As soon as you come home, change your clothes. Thus, your outfits for going out will be able to maintain a presentable look for a long time.

Prepare for Trouble. Carry a needle and thread with you at all times. They will come in handy if you have to sew something up or you rub a corn.

Create your style. Never wear things that don't suit you, even if they are trendy. It is better to choose what betrays you attractiveness.

Shoes for the occasion. Always choose shoes according to style and event. In some cases, shoes may look out of place, in others, ballet flats will look too simple.

In one situation or another. True, to experience uncertainty is justified - this is one thing, but another thing is when a person doubts everything all the time. can easily ruin a person's life. If this state of affairs does not suit you, and you are thinking about how to become a self-confident person, then you can still fix it.

Three types of behavior

There are three main types of behavior:

1. Aggressive.
2. Passive.
3. Confident.

An aggressive person humiliates people and infringes on their interests. Such a person tries to achieve his goal no matter what. Naturally, others do not accept such a person and try to avoid it.

A passive person, on the contrary, is inferior in everything to other people, thus infringing on his own interests. Such an individual gives society the right to decide everything for itself, and as a result does not achieve its goals.

The behavior of a self-confident person differs significantly from the above types of behavior. man, what are his characteristic differences can be identified? Confident person:

Does not solve all issues at the expense of other people;

He achieves his goals without affecting the interests of others;

People are always drawn to such a person;

A confident person often experiences mental comfort;

He brings a lot of positivity into the lives of others;

Such an individual expresses his thoughts without offending the interlocutor.

How to become confident and successful, guided by these theses? Psychologists advise to start, first of all, with the body. Be sure to watch your gestures, posture, posture. Do not slouch, do not lower your head, but, on the contrary, always walk with your shoulders straight and with your head held high. When communicating with the interlocutor, look directly, and not at the floor or to the sides.

Highly important element to develop self-confidence is, of course, the voice, as well as the pace of speech. How to become a confident person with correct speech? It is very important that your voice is firm, even and calm. Control it even when you are angry. The pace of speech should not be fast, no hesitations and words such as “well”, “like”, “you know”, etc.

Another important aspect is self-esteem. How to become a self-confident person? Boost your self-esteem! High (but in no case will a person become much more successful in many areas of life. Unfortunately, many people have low self-esteem. They are used to focusing on their failures and forgetting their achievements very quickly. It will be good to keep a diary where you you will write down your progress, even the smallest ones.After some time, you will find in your journal quite a few goals achieved.

As practice shows, women most often suffer from self-doubt. and self-confident? We recommend that you first analyze your attitude towards yourself, and then towards others. Think about how you communicate and how you feel about it that prevents you from being confident. Remember, your self-esteem should not constantly change due to negative assessment behavior or other failures.

Systematic work on yourself will definitely help you become a self-confident person, improve the quality of your life.

Some people think that self-confidence is a genetic trait. Either you are born a confident person or you are not. If you also hold this opinion, and you lack self-confidence, then after reading this article, you will have to admit that your opinion is wrong. Everyone can develop self-confidence. By changing their thinking and behavior, each person can become a self-confident person. If you want to become a self-confident person, by all means read this article.

Steps

Part 1

work on right thinking

Be proud of your strengths. If you want to become a confident person, the first thing you need to do is think about what you already have. Perhaps you think that you are the most ordinary person, no different from other people. In addition, you may think that other people are much better and more attractive than you. However, if you want to become a confident person, you need to change your mindset! Make a list of your positive personality traits. This may be the ability to listen well or having beautiful voice. These positive features may mean nothing to you. But in fact, you have a lot to be proud of.

• If you like the idea of ​​making a list positive features your personality, try to keep this list always at hand. Add to the list whenever you have the thought: “Oh, right, I can do this too ...” When you feel down or feel like you are worthless, look at the list and you will definitely feel better.
• Talk to a close friend about it. Ask him to name your strengths. Your friend can name such character traits that you think are not inherent in you. Remember, you can see it from the side!

1. Work on becoming an optimist. Of course, it is impossible to become an optimist quickly, just as it is impossible to build Rome in one day. However, this does not mean at all that you should not take on this matter. Develop the ability to be optimistic about the future. Optimism and confidence often go hand in hand. People who hope for a good future believe that something good will happen to them if they put in the necessary effort. Monitor your thinking, paying attention to how many negative thoughts you have during the day. Work on replacing one negative thought with at least, three positive. With effort, you will very soon look at the world in a positive way.

   • The next time you spend time with your friends, tell them about the exciting events that are happening in your life or what you are looking forward to. You will notice that the attitude towards you from your friends will become better. Your mood will also improve significantly.

2. Get ready. If you are ready for any situation - within reason, of course - you can become a confident person. If you have to take a math exam in the near future, set aside enough time to prepare. If you'll be showing your presentation to classmates, practice until you've finished your presentation. If you are going to a party, you must necessary information associated with upcoming event. For example, you should know who will be at the party when it starts, as well as others important details. Thanks to this, you will not worry about what awaits you in the evening. While it's impossible to be fully prepared for any given situation, which is part fun and part life's secret, preparation will certainly help you feel more confident.

   • If you can share something interesting with friends and contribute to the conversation, you will feel more confident than if you just sit and listen to others. Of course, you don't have to constantly talk to feel confident person. However, try to speak often enough so that you can feel that you are making the conversation interesting.
   • You can draw on information to contribute to the conversation later by reading interesting articles while browsing the news or doing research on current events or topics of interest. While chatting with friends, bring up a topic that you have researched in recent times. You will feel confident because you own large quantity information on the topic under discussion.
   • If you possess certain information or skills, for example, you know how to make furniture or you can easily find the right pair of shoes for High school prom, people can turn to you for help. You will become a more confident person if you help and benefit others.

3. Stop comparing yourself to other people. Focus all your attention on yourself and on achieving your goals, instead of looking at your neighbor and lamenting that you are not as attractive / smart / confident as he is. Be kind to yourself and focus on your dreams and goals. Be proud of yourself when you achieve your goal.

   Get rid of sources of negativity. Unfortunately, it is impossible to get rid of everything that can make you feel despondent. However, you can make an effort to surround yourself positive people and situations. Heed to following advice:

   Part 2

   Go to action

   1. Embrace the unknown. If you're having self-confidence issues, chances are you're not interested when you think about something new. However, if you want to become a confident person, try doing something new for yourself. For example, try meeting new people at a party and tell them about yourself, join a dance club even if you can't dance at all, or send your resume to a company you can only dream of getting a job at. The more time you devote to doing something new, the more secure you can feel, because you will understand that you can cope with any life situation. Mentioned below are some tips to help you embrace the unknown:

      • start small. Try starting a conversation with someone you see often but never interact with, such as the boy who sits next to you in math class or your neighbor;
      • plan a trip to a new place, for example, visit a small town that is 80 km from your home. Make it a habit to visit new places and get to know something new for yourself;
      • start learning foreign language. By doing something new, you will experience pleasure, and feel more self-confidence.

   2. Be prepared to take risks. If a person is willing to take (reasonable) risks, they are more likely to learn something new and assert themselves as a person. If you want to become a more confident person, don't limit yourself to something new for yourself, try to do things that cause fear and confusion in you. Of course, not always, taking risks, you will achieve something great. However, you can develop the habit of putting yourself in difficult situation and try to get out of it. By taking risks, you will expand the boundaries of the possible for yourself, and will not be limited to things that are familiar to you. You will understand that you can do a lot.

      • Set a goal to get out of your comfort zone at least once a day. Try talking to someone you like. Ask him out on a date.
      • If you are dissatisfied with your job but are afraid of losing it, try sending your resume to another company. Even if nothing comes of it, you have little to lose.
      • Learn to overcome fear when you experience it. Don't bungee jump if you're afraid of heights. Try to take the elevator to the top floor of a ten-story building and look out the window. Through this, you will be able to understand that you can overcome what causes your fear.

   3. Spend time with people who make you feel good. Enlisting the support of loved ones, you can become a self-confident person. If you spend a lot of time with people who support each other and are ready to help when needed, you will become a confident person. Spend as much time as possible with people in whose company you feel good.

      • Hanging out with confident people can be a big help for you. Instead of being jealous of them, ask yourself, "What do they do differently, and how can I develop these qualities?" You will find that confident people are not better than you, they just think positively of themselves.

   4. Do your favorite thing. If you do what you love, you will be happy and harmonious personality. Thanks to this, you will become a self-confident person. If you do what you love, the creative side of your personality will improve, due to which you will notice in yourself significant changes both in the workplace and in interactions with other people. In addition, a hobby helps you find people with similar interests and gain their support, which is very important for your well-being.

      Work on making your body language reflect your self-confidence. Make sure your back is straight. Thanks to correct posture you will feel more confident. If you slouch all the time, other people will think that you are unhappy with yourself and will treat you as someone who lacks self-confidence. Instead, keep your back straight and your shoulders back.

      Watch your appearance. If you set aside enough time to take care of your appearance, very soon you will begin to perceive yourself differently, appreciating your virtues. If you want to become a self-confident person, follow the rules of personal hygiene: take a daily shower, comb your hair and keep your clothes clean and tidy. If you don't take care of your appearance, others will see that you don't spend enough time taking care of yourself and this will reflect on their attitude towards you.

   Part 3

   Improve yourself

   1. Learn from mistakes. Self-confident people do not always succeed in everything. Faced with failure, they do not give up, but continue on their way. They learn from their mistakes, drawing valuable lessons that will be useful to them in the future. The next time you receive bad grade on control work in math, fail a job interview, get rejected, asking the person you like on a date, don't give up. Try to learn valuable lessons from the existing negative situations. Of course, sometimes life gives us unpleasant surprises and each of us can become a victim of bad luck. However, do your best to correct the situation and succeed next time.

      • Many are familiar with the phrase: "If it didn't work the first time, then ...". Actually this true statement. Think about how boring life would be if everything worked out for you. Instead, see failure as an opportunity to reach your goal next time.
      • It is important to admit your mistake and accept backfire associated with it.

   2. Go in for sports. Of course, after one exercise session, you are unlikely to experience the full health benefits. However, if you do physical exercises at least 30 minutes every day or several times a week, you will feel better. Physical exercise stimulates the production of endorphins, which makes a person feel happy and satisfied, and it also has a beneficial effect on his physical state health. This is a win-win. Exercise when it suits you and you will become a confident person.

      • Think about how exercise opens up an opportunity to get out of your comfort zone and try new things. You may feel nervous at the thought of having to attend a yoga or zumba class, but trust me, once you attend your first class, you will realize that your fears were unfounded.
      • You just need to be yourself. Don't let anyone force you to be different, that's the only way you can truly be a confident person.
      • Remember, inside every person there is hidden opportunities. Engage your best self by setting goals. Success is the true key to self-confidence.
      • Walk with your head held high, keep your shoulders back and look straight ahead.
      • Praise yourself and say nice things to yourself every night before bed.
      • Strive to have a good relationship with other people. Do not offend people, because this can turn against you and lead to a loss of self-confidence. Don't be rude.
      • Do your best to produce good impression to acquaintances and strangers.

Not all girls have self-confidence, which often turns into difficulties for them in their careers and personal lives. Is there a way to acquire this quality if it has not been instilled since childhood?

Signs of an insecure person

Rapid, chaotic, or slurred speech. You are embarrassed to express your opinion, and if this happens, it is clear that you are uncomfortable. The doubtful intonation in the voice of a shy person and interlocutors makes one doubt her words. Distracted look. You rarely look the other person in the eye, and you are generally uncomfortable when they look at you, you are afraid eye contact. However, please note that when you look into the eyes of the interlocutor, then he has no choice, he also looks into your eyes. If you constantly look away, then a person has more possibilities in the meantime, explore any flaws (perceived or real) that give you self-doubt. Clumsiness. When talking, you do not know where to put your hands, how best to sit down and the like. Due to your chaotic movements, some objects can often fall, you touch the interlocutor with your hands or stumble out of the blue. Closure. Girls who feel insecure most often prefer to lead a secluded lifestyle. If this is your case, then it means that you try to avoid society. unfamiliar people, and someone else's attention in the first place does not flatter you, but makes you tense. Too inconspicuous or defiant clothing. Most often, girls who could do with gaining more self-confidence prefer to wear things that are not attractive. special attention- they do not seek to emphasize sexuality or femininity, being afraid to look ridiculous. In more rare cases there may be another extreme - the girl puts on provocative things, thereby trying to hide her complexes.

If you notice any of these signs in yourself, then you probably need to reconsider your attitude towards yourself. Doubts that periodically overcome you interfere with a fulfilling life. However good news that you can get rid of them!

How to learn to be more confident

1. You should find a hobby or occupation in which you can achieve good results. Think about what you have a predisposition to, and get on with it. Perhaps as a child you were good at drawing, sewing or dancing. Get back to this activity! A person who is successful in some area of ​​life (hobby or work) is more confident in himself. 2. Do not ignore problems that you could have solved long ago if not for your insecurities. It would not hurt you to go to the dentist for a long time, but you are embarrassed, starting the problem more and more? You need to talk to someone unpleasant person, but you try your best to delay this moment? There can be many such examples. Until you solve the problem that has arisen, it will remain in your thoughts, and, therefore, in your life. Get over your fear and the problem will remain in the gap. Many difficulties are solved in minutes, and instead you spend weeks and months worrying. 3. Don't be afraid to speak your mind. Others may treat you differently than you expect, solely because they are unaware of your sincere expectations. Feel free to speak out loud information about what you want from other people. Pre-formulate the thought in your head, say it to yourself several times, and then confidently and calmly voice it. 4. Deal with adversity with dignity. Having survived the betrayal of a loved one, faced with an illness or some kind of resentment, do not give up, but try to analyze the situation. Such shocks are not an occasion for depression, but for becoming stronger in the face of life's adversities. 5. Forget self-pity. You should love yourself, but don't be sorry. This feeling does nothing to improve self-esteem. If any trouble happened to you, you do not need to lament over your hard fate, even deeper climbing under his "shell". Sometimes resentment and anger at the fact that you are so ridiculously put in a similar situation can be much more useful and productive. 6. Take care of your appearance. It has long been no secret to anyone that what better woman looks, the more confident she feels. Probably, you have noticed more than once that, having made a successful hairstyle or buying a new thing that suits you, you feel differently. If such successful innovations in your appearance will occur regularly, then this will undoubtedly have a positive effect on your self-esteem. 7. Circle of friends. Note that the wider your social circle, the better for you. Frequent communication with the opposite sex will positively affect your personal life. Regularly in many cities, and perhaps in yours, there are events where you can meet other people - exciting excursions, trainings and workshops.

How to become a more determined and calm woman

A calm and self-confident woman often causes only respect and admiration. Is it easy to become such a woman? Fighting negativity. You must not give in to negative emotions. Suppress the habit of criticizing other people and becoming annoyed because of their attitude towards you. Think about what makes the offenders do this or that, what deep motives they actually pursue. Talk openly and calmly with the person who is causing you backlash Find out exactly what he's up to. If possible, keep your meetings to a minimum. Stop being offended. Perhaps resentment is one of the most unconstructive feelings that are characteristic of children, but very strange for adults. In response to some act that offended you, you should not withdraw into yourself and move away from the person - explain to him that his act hurt you. Argument this. Learn to build a dialogue, conveying your desires through it. Control emotions. If you feel that you are on the limit, and you are having a hard time coping with your emotions, mentally collect your thoughts. If appropriate, just walk out of the conflict zone by telling the person calmly and without offense, “Let's get back to this conversation later. I have to go now". If a we are talking about an impending quarrel with a stranger, then also try to turn off the conversation as soon as possible. Be calm. Even if there are millions of thoughts, doubts or indignation inside you, try not to show it outwardly. Breathe evenly using your diaphragm. Inhale slowly and exhale for a few minutes. Step aside and do some deep breaths. Concentrate not on negative emotions, but on your breath.

Take a break. If something upsets or angers you, then find an opportunity to distract yourself from it. Take the example of Jane Eyre, and tell yourself what you will think about it tomorrow, or at least a little later. In the meantime, do something more pleasant for yourself - call close person with whom you like to communicate, look good film go to a concert and the like. Do some sports. Many women and men involved in sports are much better than others in coping with their negative emotions. This is not surprising, since during training on simulators, wrestling, swimming or fitness, stress is significantly relieved.

When you need to be bold or self-confident

Of course, it’s great if you become a calm and reasonable girl, but often this is not enough for self-confidence. Sometimes it is necessary to demonstrate to others that you are capable of insolence. Do not confuse with hysteria! So when is it appropriate? 1 - Insult. If someone is clearly trying to hurt you more, then you need to make it clear to the offender that you do not intend to tolerate this. Learn to take a hit, and respond to outright rudeness in the same vein. Of course, you should not slide down to “bazaar showdowns”, it is desirable to be able to put a person in his place with one or two phrases, like: “It's none of your business”, “Your behavior is tactless” and the like. 2 - Disrespect. When a salesperson is deliberately ignoring you, when friends or relatives are obviously taking advantage of you, or when other similar situations of disrespect occur to you, you may well be insolent - once calmly and firmly stated what you think about the person. If this does not bring results, start avoiding communication with him. 3 - Game. Insolence and self-confidence can be used in completely harmless forms. It can be a playful conversation with a lover - and you and he understand that this is just flirtatiousness, and both of you like it.

What is the difference between arrogance and confidence

What can be called arrogance? Perhaps this is a violation of established norms of behavior, for the sake of obtaining own benefit. Let's define the signs by which you can distinguish arrogant behavior from confident.

The behavior of arrogant people

Ignoring established standards of conduct. An example would be climbing to the checkout window without a queue, borrowing some things without demand from their owner, and the like. Absence of shame. Insolent man it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks of it. He does what is beneficial to him, without regard to the opinions of others. Tactlessness. Insolent persons almost always have their own opinion on a particular situation, which they are ready to express even against the will of other people. Own interests at any price. If they need something, they will do everything to achieve it, while having “nothing sacred”. They may ignore the fact that their actions cause significant harm to other people, even if they are children or the elderly.

I will be bolder - I will become strong

In fact, resorting to impudent behavior, you can quickly get some benefit, but later it can turn against you. The reputation of an impudent person does not paint anyone - such people cause irritation and a repulsive impression. Insolence has nothing to do with self-confidence, because the second is usually based on a feeling dignity, which is unnatural for arrogance.

What psychologists say

Most often, self-doubt can go back to childhood. Possibly in adolescence or younger school years someone instilled this quality in you - teachers, peers or even relatives. It is important to realize that now you are an adult, and all those situations are in the past. It is much worse if there are people in your life who develop certain complexes in you. You need to avoid communicating with such personalities in every possible way, and if possible, completely exclude contacts with them (unless we are talking about a family member). Try to communicate more often with those who inspire confidence and self-confidence in you. Notice which people in the company of which your mood rises, and initiate contact with them more often. Pamper yourself more often and give yourself gifts. Very often, self-doubt begins with appearance, and it is up to you to improve it. Head to the salon for new beauty treatments, massages. Pay attention to your hair, take care of your skin. Surround yourself with things good quality. It is better to buy things less often, but more expensive. You should feel confident in your clothes - no worn, untidy, irrelevant size. Things should increase your self-esteem, and not make you feel embarrassed or uncomfortable. Open up new horizons for yourself - take on interesting hobbies, travel to other countries or cities. If you constantly develop in any direction, then your self-esteem will inevitably grow. Learn to express your thoughts clearly and confidently. Practice in front of a camera or a mirror, watching how you look from the side. The camera is sometimes even more useful, you will not be able to control yourself as much as in front of a mirror, and you will be able to understand how others see you. An insecure person is often betrayed by posture and gait. If you understand that you also have problems with this, but you should work hard on these points. Constantly control your posture until it becomes a habit. Ask someone to film your walk. Study it, and, seeing the shortcomings, try to correct it until you bring it to the ideal. Do not forget, while walking, look not at your feet, but straight ahead. Your movements should be calm, smooth and confident. Try to start looking like a confident girl, and over time you will become one.