COMMUNICATION(English) communication, intercourse, interpersonal relationship) - the interaction of 2 or more people, consisting in the exchange between them of information of a cognitive and / or affective-evaluative nature.
Verbal communication- uses human speech as a sign system, natural sound language, that is, a system of phonetic signs, which includes two principles: lexical and syntactic. Speech is the most universal means of communication, since when information is transmitted through speech, the meaning of the message is least of all lost.
The system of phonetic signs of a language is built on the basis of vocabulary and syntax. Vocabulary is a set of words that make up a language. Syntax- these are the means and rules for creating speech units that are characteristic of specific languages. Speech is the most universal means of communication, since when transmitting information, the meaning of the message is lost in least degree compared to other means of communication. Speech, therefore, is language in action, a form of generalized reflection of reality, a form of existence of thinking. Indeed, in thinking, speech manifests itself in the form of internal pronunciation of words to oneself. Thinking and speech are inseparable from each other. The transfer of information using speech occurs according to the following scheme: the communicator (the speaker) selects the words necessary to express the thought; connects them according to the rules of grammar, using the principles of vocabulary and syntax; pronounces these words due to the articulation of the organs of speech. The recipient (listener) perceives speech, decodes speech units for the correct understanding of the thought expressed in it. But this happens when the communicators use a language that is understandable to both National language developed in the process of verbal communication over many generations of people.
Speech performs two main functions - significative and communicative.
Thanks to significative function for a person (unlike an animal) it becomes possible to arbitrarily evoke images of objects, to perceive the semantic content of speech. Thanks to the communicative function, speech becomes a means of communication, a means of transmitting information.
The word makes it possible to analyze objects, things, to highlight their essential and secondary features. Mastering the word, a person automatically masters complex systems connections and relations between objects and phenomena of the objective world. The ability to analyze objects and phenomena of the objective world, to single out the essential, main and secondary in them, to attribute these objects and phenomena to certain categories(i.e. classify them) is a sine qua non in determining the meaning of a word. A dictionary compiled on this basis, covering the terms-concepts of any special field of activity, is called thesaurus.
Communicative function of speech manifests itself in means of expression and means of influence. Speech is not limited to the aggregate transmitted messages, it expresses at the same time the attitude of a person to what he is talking about, and the attitude to the one with whom he communicates. Thus, emotional and expressive components (rhythm, pause, intonation, voice modulation, etc.) are manifested to one degree or another in the speech of each individual. Expressive components are also present in writing(in the text of the letter, this is manifested in the sweeping handwriting and the pressure, the angle of its inclination, the direction of the lines, the shape of capital letters, etc.). The word as a means of influence and its emotional and expressive components are inseparable, they act simultaneously, to a certain extent influencing the behavior of the recipient.
Types of verbal communication.
Distinguish between external and internal speech. External speech divided by oral and written. Oral speech, in turn, on dialogical and monologue. In preparation for oral speech and especially for writing, the individual "pronounces" the speech to himself. That's what it is inner speech . In written speech, the conditions of communication are mediated by the text. Written speech may be direct(for example, exchanging notes at a meeting, at a lecture) or delayed(exchange of letters).
To a peculiar form verbal communication applies finger speech. This is a manual alphabet that serves to replace oral speech when deaf and blind people communicate with each other and persons familiar with fingerprinting. Dactyl marks replace letters (similar to letters in block type).
The accuracy of the listener's understanding of the meaning of the speaker's statement depends on the feedback. Such feedback is established when the communicator and the recipient alternately change places. The recipient, by his statement, makes it clear how he understood the meaning of the received information. Thus, dialogue speech represents a kind of sequential change in the communicative roles of the communicants, during which the meaning of the speech message is revealed. monologue same speech continues long enough, not interrupted by the remarks of others. It requires advance preparation. It is usually expanded preparatory speech(for example, a report, lecture, etc.).
The constant and effective exchange of information is the key to the achievement of any organization or firm of its goals. The importance of verbal communication, for example in management, cannot be overestimated. However, here, as shown above, it is also necessary to pursue the goal of ensuring the correct understanding of the transmitted information or semantic messages. The ability to accurately express one's thoughts, the ability to listen are the components of the communicative side of communication. Unskillful expression of thoughts leads to a misinterpretation of what was said. Poor listening distorts the meaning of the information being conveyed. Below is a methodology for the two main ways of listening: non-reflective and reflective.
In speech, language is realized and through it, through utterances, language performs its communicative function. The main functions of the language in the communication process include: communicative (the function of information exchange); constructive (formulation of thoughts); appellative (impact on the addressee); emotive (direct emotional reaction to the situation); phatic (exchange of ritual (etiquette) formulas); metalinguistic (interpretation function. It is used when it is necessary to check whether the interlocutors use the same code).
Through observation of non-verbal means of communication, we manage to glean a huge amount of information about a partner. However, the information received may not be entirely reliable, since, firstly, there is a possibility that we could not quite correctly interpret the received signals, and secondly, our interlocutor may try to hide the truth by deliberately using his knowledge of non-verbal signals. That is why, for completeness of information, it is necessary to analyze both non-verbal and verbal means of communication.
Verbal (or verbal) communication is “the process of establishing and maintaining purposeful, direct or indirect, contact between people with the help of language” (Kunitsyna V.N., 2001, p. 46).
According to the authors of the book "Interpersonal Communication" (ibid.), speaking people can have speech flexibility to varying degrees. So, some of them pay minimal attention to the choice of speech means, talking in different time with different people, in different circumstances, mostly in the same style. Others, in an effort to preserve their stylistic appearance, are able to perform different speech roles, using a different stylistic speech repertoire in various situations. However, in addition to the individual characteristics of participants in verbal communication, the choice of the style of speech behavior is also influenced by the social context. The role situation dictates the need to turn to poetic, then to official, then to scientific or everyday speech.
Thus, holding a scientific conference for parents requires the teacher to be able to operate with strict scientific terms (which, nevertheless, must be deciphered in speech in order to exclude misunderstanding of the insufficiently prepared part of the audience and thereby prevent possible aggressive attacks or "self-elimination" of listeners in such cases).
In cases of conflict with parents, it is better to adhere to the official manner of communication. The authors of the monograph mentioned above give the following principles for constructing speech communication.
The principle of cooperation(“the requirement for interlocutors to act in a way that would be consistent with the accepted purpose and direction of the conversation” - suggests that verbal communication should:
- contain the optimal amount of information. (it must correspond to the current goals of communication, excessive information can be distracting, misleading);
- contain truthful statements;
- correspond to the goals, the subject of the conversation;
- be clear (avoiding incomprehensible expressions, verbosity).
Principle of politeness, which implies the expression in speech:
- tact;
- generosity;
- approvals;
- modesty;
- consent;
- benevolence.
Pedagogical practice shows that an incorrectly built verbal message can lead both to misunderstanding by partners of each other, and to an open conflict. That is why most of the literature devoted to the problems constructive behavior in conflict, is aimed at optimizing verbal communication (Grishina N.V., 2002). Verbal communication can be disruptive and is a channel for finding relationships.
Communication is carried out by various means. Allocate verbal and non-verbal means of communication.
Verbal communication(sign) is carried out with the help of words. To verbal means communication refers to human speech. Communication experts estimate that a modern person pronounces approximately 30,000 words a day, or more than 3,000 words per hour.
Depending on the intentions of the communicants (to tell something, to learn, to express an assessment, attitude, to induce to something, to agree, etc.), various speech texts arise. Any text (written or oral) implements a system of language.
So, language is a system of signs and ways of connecting them, which serves as an instrument for expressing thoughts, feelings and wills of people and is the most important means of human communication. The language is used in a wide variety of functions:
- Communicative. Language acts as the main means of communication. Due to the presence of such a function in the language, people have the opportunity to fully communicate with their own kind.
- Cognitive. Language as an expression of the activity of consciousness. We receive most of the information about the world through language.
- Accumulative. Language as a means of accumulation and storage of knowledge. The person tries to keep the acquired experience and knowledge in order to use them in the future. AT Everyday life we are rescued by abstracts, diaries, notebooks. And the "notebooks" of all mankind are all sorts of monuments of writing and fiction, which would be impossible without the existence of a written language.
- Constructive. Language as a means of forming thoughts. With the help of language, the thought “materializes”, acquires a sound form. Expressed verbally, the thought becomes distinct, clear to the speaker himself.
- Emotional. Language as one of the means of expressing feelings and emotions. This function is realized in speech only when it is directly expressed emotional attitude person to what he is talking about. Intonation plays a big role in this.
- Contact setting. Language as a means of establishing contact between people. Sometimes communication seems to be aimless, its information content is zero, only the ground is being prepared for further fruitful, trusting communication.
- Ethnic. Language as a means of uniting people.
Speech activity is understood as a situation when a person uses language to communicate with other people. There are several types of speech activity:
- speaking - the use of language in order to communicate something;
- - perception of the content of sounding speech;
- writing - fixing the content of speech on paper;
- reading - the perception of information recorded on paper.
From the point of view of the form of existence of the language, communication is divided into oral and written, and from the point of view of the number of participants - into interpersonal and mass.
Any national is heterogeneous, it exists in different forms. From the point of view of social and cultural status, literary and non-literary forms of the language are distinguished.
The literary form of the language, otherwise - the literary language, is understood by the speakers as exemplary. The main feature of the literary language is the presence of stable norms.
Literary language has two forms: oral and written. First - sounding speech, and the second - graphically designed. The oral form is original. Non-literary forms of the language include territorial and social dialects, vernacular.
For behavior, it is non-verbal means of communication that are of particular importance. In non-verbal communication, the means of transmitting information are non-verbal signs (postures, gestures, facial expressions, intonations, attitudes, spatial arrangement, etc.).
To the main non-verbal means of communication relate:
Kinetics - considers the external manifestation human feelings and emotions in the process of communication. It includes:
- gesture;
- facial expressions;
- pantomime.
Gesture. Gestures are various movements of the hands and head. Sign language is the oldest way to achieve mutual understanding. In different historical eras and different peoples had their own generally accepted ways of gesticulation. Currently, attempts are even being made to create gesture dictionaries. Quite a lot is known about the information that gestures carry. First of all, the amount of gesture is important. Different peoples developed and entered into natural forms various expressions of feelings cultural norms strength and frequency of gestures. M. Argyle's studies, which studied the frequency and strength of gestures in different cultures, showed that within one hour the Finns gestured 1 time, the French - 20, the Italians - 80, the Mexicans - 180.
The intensity of gesticulation can grow along with an increase in the emotional arousal of a person, and also, if desired, to achieve more full understanding between partners, especially if it is difficult.
The specific meaning of individual gestures is different in different cultures. However, in all cultures there are similar gestures, among which are:
Communicative (gestures of greeting, farewell, attracting attention, prohibitions, affirmative, negative, interrogative, etc.)
Modal, i.e. expressing assessment and attitude (gestures of approval, satisfaction, trust and distrust, etc.).
Descriptive gestures that make sense only in the context of a verbal utterance.
Mimic. Facial expressions are the movements of the muscles of the face, the main indicator of feelings. Studies have shown that with a motionless or invisible face of the interlocutor, up to 10-15% of information is lost. There are over 20,000 descriptions of facial expressions in the literature. Main characteristic facial expressions is its integrity and dynamism. This means that in the facial expression of the six basic emotional states (anger, joy, fear, sadness, surprise, disgust), all facial muscle movements are coordinated. The main informative load in the mimic plan is carried by eyebrows and lips.
Visual contact is also exclusively important element communication. Looking at the speaker means not only interest, but also helps to focus on what we are being told. Communicating people usually look into each other's eyes for no more than 10 seconds. If we are looked at a little, we have reason to believe that we or what we say are treated badly, and if there is too much, this may be perceived as a challenge or a good attitude towards us. In addition, it has been observed that when a person lies or tries to hide information, his eyes meet the eyes of a partner for less than 1/3 of the conversation time.
In part, the longitude of a person's gaze depends on what nation he belongs to. Southern Europeans have a high gaze frequency that can be offensive to others, and the Japanese look at the neck rather than the face when talking.
According to its specificity, a look can be:
- Business - when the gaze is fixed on the forehead of the interlocutor, this implies the creation of a serious atmosphere of business partnership
- Social - the gaze is concentrated in the triangle between the eyes and the mouth, this contributes to the creation of an atmosphere of easy secular communication.
- Intimate - the gaze is directed not into the eyes of the interlocutor, but below the face - to the level of the chest. Such a look indicates a great interest in each other in communication.
- A sideways glance is used to convey interest or hostility. If accompanied by slightly raised eyebrows or a smile, it indicates interest. If it is accompanied by a frowning forehead or lowered corners of the mouth, this indicates a critical or suspicious attitude towards the interlocutor.
Pantomime is a gait, posture, posture, general motor skills of the whole body.
Gait is the way a person moves. Its components are: rhythm, step dynamics, amplitude of body transfer during movement, body weight. By the gait of a person, one can judge the well-being of a person, his character, age. In psychological studies, people recognized emotions such as anger, suffering, pride, happiness by walking. It turned out that a "heavy" gait is typical for people who are angry, "light" - for joyful ones. A proud person has the longest stride, and if a person suffers, his gait is lethargic, oppressed, such a person rarely looks up or in the direction he is walking.
In addition, it can be argued that people who walk quickly, swinging their arms, are self-confident, have a clear goal and ready to implement it. Those who always keep their hands in their pockets are likely to be very critical and secretive, as a rule, they like to put other people down. A person who keeps his hands on his hips seeks to achieve his goals in the shortest possible way in the minimum amount of time.
Posture is the position of the body. The human body is able to take about 1000 stable different positions. The pose shows how this person perceives his status in relation to the status of other persons present. Persons with higher status adopt a more relaxed posture. Otherwise, conflict situations may arise.
One of the first to point out the role of a person's posture as a means in non-verbal communication was the psychologist A. Sheflen. In further studies conducted by V. Schubts, it was revealed that the main semantic content of the posture is the individual's placement of his body in relation to the interlocutor. This placement indicates either closeness or a disposition for communication.
A pose in which a person crosses his arms and legs is called a closed position. Arms crossed on the chest are a modified version of the barrier that a person puts up between himself and his interlocutor. A closed posture is perceived as a posture of distrust, disagreement, opposition, criticism. Moreover, about a third of the information perceived from such a posture is not absorbed by the interlocutor. Most in a simple way getting out of this position is an offer to hold or look at something.
An open position is one in which the arms and legs are not crossed, the body is directed towards the interlocutor, and the palms and feet are turned towards the communication partner. This is a posture of trust, consent, goodwill, psychological comfort.
If a person is interested in communication, he will focus on the interlocutor and lean towards him, and if he is not very interested, on the contrary, orient himself to the side and lean back. A person who wants to make himself known will keep himself upright, in a tense state, with his shoulders turned; a person who does not need to emphasize his status and position will be relaxed, calm, in a free, relaxed position.
The best way to achieve mutual understanding with the interlocutor is to copy his posture and gestures.
Takeshika - the role of touch in the process verbal communication. Handshakes, kisses, stroking, pushing, etc. stand out here. Dynamic touch has been proven to be a biologically necessary form of stimulation. A person's use of dynamic touch in communication is determined by many factors: the status of partners, their age, gender, degree of acquaintance.
Inadequate use of tactical means by a person can lead to conflicts in communication. For example, a pat on the shoulder is possible only under the condition of close relations, equality social position in society.
Shaking hands is a multi-talking gesture known since ancient times. primitive people at a meeting, they extended their hands to each other with open palms forward to show their unarmedness. This gesture has changed over time, and its variants have appeared, such as waving the hand in the air, placing the palm on the chest, and many others, including the handshake. Often a handshake can be very informative, especially its intensity and duration.
Handshakes are divided into 3 types:
- dominant (hand on top, palm turned down);
- submissive (hand below, palm turned up);
- equal.
The dominant handshake is the most aggressive form of it. With a dominant (powerful) handshake, a person tells the other that he wants to dominate the communication process.
A submissive handshake is necessary in situations where a person wants to give the initiative to another, to let him feel like a master of the situation.
A gesture called "glove" is often used: a person wraps both hands around the other's hand. The initiator of this gesture emphasizes that he is honest and can be trusted. However, the “glove” gesture should be applied to well-known people, because at the first meeting, it can have the opposite effect.
A firm handshake up to the crunch of fingers is a hallmark of an aggressive, tough person.
A sign of aggressiveness is also shaking with an unbent, straight hand. Its main purpose is to keep a distance and prevent a person from entering his intimate zone. The same goal is pursued by shaking the fingertips, but such a handshake indicates that a person is not confident in himself.
Proxemics - defines the areas most effective communication. E. Hall identifies four main areas of communication:
- Intimate zone (15-45 cm) - a person allows only people close to him into it. In this zone, a quiet confidential conversation is conducted, tactile contacts are made. Violation of this zone by outsiders causes physiological changes in the body: an increase in heart rate, an increase in blood pressure, a rush of blood to the head, an adrenaline rush, etc. The invasion of a “stranger” into this zone is regarded as a threat.
- Personal (personal) zone (45 - 120 cm) - a zone of everyday communication with friends and colleagues. Only visual eye contact is allowed.
- Social zone (120 - 400 cm) - a zone for official meetings and negotiations, meetings, administrative conversations.
- Public zone (more than 400 cm) - a zone of communication with large groups of people during lectures, rallies, public speaking, etc.
In communication, it is also important to pay attention to vocal characteristics related to non-verbal communication. Prosody is the general name for such rhythmic and intonational aspects of speech as pitch, volume of voice, its timbre.
Extralinguistics is the inclusion of pauses and various non-morphological human phenomena in speech: crying, coughing, laughter, sighing, etc.
The flow of speech is regulated by prosodic and extralinguistic means, linguistic means of communication are saved, they supplement, replace and anticipate speech statements, express emotional states.
It is necessary to be able not only to listen, but also to hear the intonation structure of speech, to evaluate the strength and tone of the voice, the speed of speech, which practically allow us to express our feelings and thoughts.
Although nature has endowed people with a unique voice, they give color to it themselves. Those who tend to sharply change the pitch of their voices tend to be more cheerful. More sociable, more confident, more competent and much more pleasant than people who speak in a monotone.
Experienced by the speaker is reflected primarily in the tone of voice. In it, feelings find their expression regardless of the spoken words. Thus, anger and sadness are usually easily recognized.
A lot of information is given by the strength and height of the voice. Some feelings, such as enthusiasm, joy and distrust, are usually conveyed in a high voice, anger and fear - also in a rather high voice, but in a wider range of tonality, strength and pitch. Feelings such as grief, sadness, fatigue are usually conveyed in a soft and muffled voice with a decrease in intonation towards the end of each phrase.
The speed of speech also reflects feelings. A person speaks quickly if he is excited, worried, talks about his personal difficulties or wants to convince us of something, to persuade. Slow speech most often indicates depression, grief, arrogance, or fatigue.
By making minor mistakes in speech, for example, repeating words, choosing them uncertainly or incorrectly, breaking off phrases in mid-sentence, people involuntarily express their feelings and reveal intentions. Uncertainty in the choice of words manifests itself when the speaker is not sure of himself or is going to surprise us. Usually speech deficiencies are more pronounced with excitement or when a person tries to deceive his interlocutor.
Since the characteristics of the voice depend on the work of various organs of the body, their state is also reflected in it. Emotions change the rhythm of breathing. Fear, for example, paralyzes the larynx, the vocal cords tense, the voice "sits down". With a good mood, the voice becomes deeper and richer in shades. It has a calming effect on others and inspires more confidence.
There is also a feedback: with the help of breathing, you can influence emotions. To do this, it is recommended to sigh noisily, opening your mouth wide. When you breathe deeply and inhale a large number of air, the mood improves, and the voice involuntarily decreases.
It is important that in the process of communication a person trusts signs of non-verbal communication more than verbal ones. According to experts, facial expressions carry up to 70% of information. When expressing our emotional reactions, we are usually more truthful than in the process of verbal communication.
VERBAL MEANS OF COMMUNICATION
No matter how important feelings, emotions, relationships of people are, but communication involves not only and not so much the transfer of emotional states, but the transfer of information. The content of information is transmitted using language, that is, it takes verbal, or verbal form.
Verbal communication is based on language and grammar and can be both oral and written. In business communication, a little less than half of the time is spent listening, a little less than a third is speaking, and one-fourth is reading and writing documents.
In communication, one has not only to express one's point of view in writing or orally, but also to perceive the opinions of other people. At the same time, it is often the ability to perceive someone else's point of view and show the interlocutor that he was understood that becomes critical for organizing a constructive dialogue.
Rice. 3. Scheme of verbal communication
When receiving information, one should concentrate on it, interpret, evaluate and highlight the meaning in order to then perceive it. It is useful to rephrase the perceived meaning to the interlocutor as a signal that we have understood it, and there is no need for him to express his thought again. Only after that, within the framework of a constructive conversation, it is advisable to tell the interlocutor what we support in his idea, what we doubt and what we strongly disagree with.
In the process of communication we:
1) we form an idea;
2) put the idea into words;
3) we speak or write words;
4) the partner receives the message;
5) the partner perceives it:
Extracts and interprets information;
Evaluates and retains the semantic part;
6) the partner reacts and sends the message back.
The process is repeated as needed until either the partners understand each other and agree on joint activities or will not give up trying to understand each other and bring their views to a common denominator.
Communication begins with the formation of an idea that reflects our understanding of the real world. Real world is objective and exists independently of our consciousness, but its perception by us is unique and depends on our characteristics.
The difference in perceptions does not mean at all that one of them is more objective than the other. Everyone sees life in their own light. The "physicist", perceiving reality, mainly extracts logical and cause-and-effect relationships, the "lyricist" - shades of emotional experiences.
The perception and picture of the world depend on education, gender, culture, mentality, which should be taken into account during communication. Any picture of the world inevitably simplifies it. Simplification leads to differences. In addition, people tend to make mistakes, which also increases the distance between our picture of the world and the picture of the world of the interlocutor.
When communicating, it is advisable to predict the picture of the interlocutor's world and bring our message as close as possible to it. It is unlikely that he is interested in knowing our problems in detail: in his picture of the world central location occupies his enterprise, not ours. Therefore, we should tell him more about the benefits that the company and the partner personally receive in the process of working together.
Having formed the idea of the message, we begin to clothe it in words. It turns out that the same idea can be conveyed in countless ways. We can say: "Petrov did his job and went on vacation." The same idea can be conveyed by another phrase: "Vanya finally pushed these ... TVs and safely dumped to the south."
The choice of words and grammar is determined by:
subject;
listeners;
Our style of communication and mood;
Education and culture.
Words and grammar should correspond to the subject and purpose of the message. When we praise a subordinate, we use direct speech and active verbs: "Petrov achieved a 30% increase in sales", in this phrase we emphasize Petrov's role in increasing sales.
When it comes to delivering negative news, we rely on impersonal sentences and passive turns: “The jump in the dollar exchange rate did not allow us to sell the next batch of TVs in time. Let's think about what we can do about it."
Each audience, as in its own subculture, has a special professional slang. For the success of the message, our professional terms should be excluded, if possible, replacing them with generally accepted words and terms understandable to the audience. Correct use using professional terms characteristic of her will show that we are familiar with the specific problems of this audience. A mistake in using someone else's slang will immediately indicate to her that in this area we are strangers.
Mood affects the choice of words used, and not always in a way that is desirable for business. Therefore, having entered into a conflict or received an unpleasant message, it is advisable to wait a few hours or a day or two to cool down. If we do not have time to cool down, then we should carefully reread our message, replacing all words with a negative emotional connotation with words with a neutral or positive connotation.
So, having received a reproach for disrupting the work schedule, you should not immediately tell the client that he failed to correctly formulate the terms of reference and changed it twice. The same idea can be conveyed much more comfortably for the customer: “After the work began, you had new wishes, which we jointly issued in the form of a new technical assignment. Its processing will allow you to more fully meet your needs. At the same time, we will make every effort to ensure that additional work and time spent on adjusting the terms of reference affect the timing of the project completion in the least possible way. Understanding the importance for you to complete the project by August 20, our employees are ready to work overtime for you, but this will raise the cost of work by 20%.
In the first answer, all the blame falls on the client, which, even if fair, will not contribute to establishing a relationship with him. good relations and getting new orders. In the second answer, the question of guilt is avoided by focusing on the benefits that the client has already received (clarification of the terms of reference) and our willingness to meet his needs (reduction of work time).
The level of education affects both our vocabulary and the partner's vocabulary. At the same time, it is highly undesirable to emphasize the difference in the level of education in order to humiliate a partner. In Western textbooks on communication, in this case, they even advise you to write a perfect letter, and then insert 2-3 errors into it, according to the level of literacy of our partner. Otherwise, he may begin to complex because of you, which will prevent the conclusion of the contract.
The same words have different meanings and different colors for interlocutors. For example, the word “intermediary” may be perceived positively by some persons, while for others it may carry a negative connotation. Such a discrepancy in the emotional coloring of the word “intermediary” somehow almost led to a breakdown in negotiations: one side fought for the purity of the Russian language, not suspecting that the other wanted to be only consultants, but by no means mediators.
Since words (symbols) can have different meanings for different people, the message will not necessarily be adequately interpreted and understood by the recipient of the information. Semantic variations (sematics is the science of the ways in which words are used and the meanings conveyed by words) are often misunderstood because in many cases it is not at all obvious exact value The assigned to the symbol by the sender.
The symbol has no unique inherent meaning. The meaning of the symbol is revealed through experience and varies depending on the context, the situation in which it is used. Since each person has his own experience and each act of information exchange is to some extent a new situation, no one can be absolutely sure that another person will attribute the same meaning to the symbol that we have given it.
Effective communication is possible when a person is equally accurate when sending and receiving messages. Necessary be able to listen. Unfortunately, not many have learned to listen with the desired degree of effectiveness. Listening to facts and feelings is listening to the message in its entirety. In doing so, we expand our ability to understand the situation and signal respect for what the person is trying to convey to us. A simple method of keeping interest and attention in the process oral communication is the method of non-reflective listening.
Not reflective listening is, in essence, the simplest technique and consists in the ability to listen silently, without interfering with the speech of the interlocutor with your remarks. Such perception can be called passive conditionally. In fact, it is an active process requiring physical and psychological attention. Depending on the situation, understanding, approval and support can be expressed in the process of non-reflective listening. Sometimes non-reflective listening is the only possibility, because the interlocutor, especially if he is emotional, agitated or has difficulty in formulating his thoughts, wants to be heard and is not interested in our comments.
Sometimes you can resort to minimizing the answers. Neutral and insignificant answers (Yes! Is that how it is? I understand you ...) allow you to meaningfully continue the conversation. Such responses are an invitation to speak freely and naturally. They help express approval, interest, and understanding. These are not just replicas that are made when there is nothing to answer.
Sometimes a hint can be understood from a non-verbal expression. For example, much about what a person wants to say can be determined by the expression on his face, by his posture or movements. In such cases, "buffer" phrases like:
"You look like a happy person";
"Is something bothering you?"
"Are you worried about something?"
"Something happened?"
Studies have shown that the simplest neutral remark or an affirmative tilt of the head encourages the interlocutor and makes him want to continue the conversation, and most importantly, communication. There are, of course, other responses that serve the same purpose. It is only important that the responses come naturally and are always really neutral. The most common minimal responses can be, for example:
“Go on, go on. It is interesting";
"Understand";
"Lovely to hear";
"Can you be more specific?"
These remarks are neutral, they are sometimes called "opening", that is, those that contribute to the development of the conversation, especially at its very beginning. These words inspire the speaker, relieve the tension that arises from the fear of being misunderstood or being silently rejected, since silence is often misinterpreted as disinterest or disagreement.
Reflective listening is not always appropriate. It can be useful, for example, in the following situations.
1. The interlocutor is eager to express his attitude to something or express his point of view. That is why many psychotherapists use non-reflective listening at the beginning of a conversation.
Non-reflective listening is also suitable for conducting interviews. It is especially useful to apply this technique during a job interview when they want to know as much as possible about the applicant. Then, at times when it is convenient, you can use neutral cues to help the interlocutor express himself. Non-reflective listening is also useful for understanding the speaker's point of view or finding out what is behind his proposal or complaint. This is especially effective in commercial negotiations, as well as in the field of trade and services in clarifying the needs of customers, when a precise mutual understanding is required in a short dialogue. Otherwise, you can act recklessly, come to false conclusions, tell people what they are not interested in, or answer questions that they do not ask.
2. The interlocutor wants to discuss pressing issues. This is exactly the case when it is recommended to apply the technique of non-reflective listening. Otherwise, pent-up feelings interfere with any attempt to establish a normal two-way conversation. When a person struggles with a solution to a problem or feels resentful, he experiences anxiety, fear, frustration, pain, anger or resentment. In such cases, it is prudent, almost without interfering with the speech of the interlocutor, to give him the opportunity to speak out and express any of his feelings. Non-reflective listening is most suitable for a tense situation.
3. The interlocutor has difficulty expressing his worries and problems. In this case, non-reflective listening allows minimal intervention in the conversation, thereby facilitating the speaker's self-expression.
Unnecessary interference in the conversation and subjective remarks block the path to mutual understanding.
4. Restraint of emotions in a conversation with a person occupying a higher position. People are often hesitant to speak up in front of their superiors for fear of endangering their relationships or jobs.
As mentioned earlier, much depends on the specifics of the situation, the personality of the speaker and the listener, and the purpose of their communication. But usually people in a higher position feel freer in starting a conversation, often interrupting the interlocutor on the merits, that is, they show a kind of power. As a result, communication becomes one-sided, with people in higher positions listening to what they want to hear, not what they need to hear.
Understanding how superiority negatively affects communication, everyone, whether it be a leader, teacher, psychotherapist, public figure or a parent, can encourage more effective communication by using non-reflective listening techniques. These techniques show the interlocutor that they are interested in him, they want to know his opinion and feelings.
There are other situations in which non-reflective listening may also be appropriate. It is known, for example, that it is easier for shy and insecure people to communicate with restrained and modest interlocutors.
There are, however, situations in which the use of non-reflective listening is not enough.
2. Non-reflexive listening is misinterpreted by the speaker as agreeing to listen when it is not. One of the dangers of listening is that others misinterpret our empathy as empathy and understanding as agreement. Attempts to explain that you listened in order to understand, and in no way disagree, are often perceived as either you have reconsidered your attitude, or you are showing hypocrisy. So when we listen to someone to understand their opinion or feelings, and at the same time disagree with what we hear, sometimes it's best to be honest and open about it. Our feelings can interrupt the flow of the conversation and even cause open disagreement, but not doing so means risking more resentment later.
3. The speaker seeks more active support or approval. In these cases, the interlocutor wants not only to be understood, but is looking for active support, approval or guidance.
4. Non-reflexive listening is inappropriate when it is contrary to the interests of the interlocutor and interferes with his self-expression.
There is always a danger that unreflexive listening can be abused by overly talkative people, especially those who are immune to the needs of others, as well as those who seek to control them with their speech.
The advantages of non-reflective listening outweigh its disadvantages. But experience and common sense determine the appropriateness of using the method of non-reflective listening in a particular situation. If this is not enough, you can resort to the techniques of reflective listening.
Reflective listening. In essence, it is objective feedback from the speaker, used as a control of the accuracy of perception of what is heard. Sometimes these techniques are called active listening because the listener, more vigorously than in non-reflective listening, uses verbal form to confirm understanding of the speaker's message.
By applying reflective listening techniques, we open our understanding of what we hear to criticism and correction. It is important that reflective listening helps us achieve greater accuracy, understanding of the interlocutor.
Leaders at all levels in any activity are convinced of the need to use reflective listening to ensure accurate understanding of the interlocutor and create favorable relationships. The ability to listen reflectively is necessary for effective communication mainly because of the limitations and difficulties that arise in the process of communication. These difficulties include:
1. Polysemy of most words. Therefore, it is sometimes difficult to establish what exactly the person who used this word meant without knowing its specific meaning for the speaker. The same word for the speaker and listener can have different meanings. Difficult to find sometimes right word, which would express exactly what we want to say. Therefore, to clarify the meaning of the words used, it is necessary to apply the techniques of reflective listening.
2. Coded meaning of most messages. It should be remembered that what we communicate to each other has certain meaning only for ourselves, exactly the one that we put in our message. When we convey meanings by conventional means, we encode them using words. To decode the message and reveal the meaning inherent in it, the listener must use feedback.
3. Difficulty of open self-expression. This means that, due to accepted conventions and the need for approval, people often begin their presentation with a small introduction, from which their intentions are not yet visible.
Subjective factors can also adversely affect the communication process. People are influenced by the prevailing attitudes, the emotions experienced, the experience gained.
All this points to the need to be able to listen reflexively, that is, to decipher the meaning of messages, to find out their real meaning. Consider some types of reflexive techniques.
1. Finding out - this is an appeal to the speaker for clarifications, which helps to make the message more understandable and contributes to a more accurate perception of it by the listeners. Often a simple remark is enough to make the speaker realize that he is expressing his thoughts inaccurately. Explanatory phrases sometimes take the form open questions. These questions cause the speaker to expand or narrow their original message. For these purposes, you can also use closed questions that require simple yes or no answers.
2. Paraphrasing . Rephrase and formulate the same idea differently. In conversation, paraphrasing consists in addressing the speaker to his message in the words of the listener.
The purpose of paraphrasing is the speaker's own formulation of the message as a means of verifying its accuracy. Paraphrasing, oddly enough, is useful precisely when the speech of the interlocutor seems clear to us.
When paraphrasing, it is important to choose only the essential, main points of the message, otherwise the answer, instead of consolidating understanding, may cause confusion. You should selectively repeat the speech of the interlocutor.
When paraphrasing, we should be mainly interested in the meaning and ideas, and not the attitude and feelings of the interlocutor.
In other words, rephrasing the message allows the speaker to see that they are listening and understanding, and if they are misunderstood, then make appropriate adjustments.
3. Reflection of feelings. Here, the emphasis is not on the content of the message, as in paraphrasing, but on the reflection by the listener of the feelings expressed by the speaker, his attitudes and emotional state. The reflection of feelings also helps the speaker - he is more fully aware of his emotional state.
Responding or emotionally reacting to the feelings of others is important because in communication people are essentially sharing what is personally important to them. Therefore, communication depends not only on factual information, but also on feelings, attitudes and emotional reaction, i.e., from what is significant for people.
Reflecting the feelings of the interlocutor, we show him that we understand his condition. To understand the feelings of the interlocutor, you should:
Pay attention to the words he uses that express feelings, for example, anger, joy, etc. Such words are key;
Monitor non-verbal means of communication: facial expression, intonation, posture, gestures and movement of the interlocutor;
Imagine how you would feel in the place of the interlocutor;
Try to understand the general context of communication, the reasons for the interlocutor's address to you.
Very often, of course, people express their feelings in an indirect, but somewhat covert way, especially when they are afraid of unwanted evaluation or criticism from others.
Installation. This is a reasonable and emotional attitude towards a person or a phenomenon, which is especially important when listening.
Having a positive attitude towards any person, we are frank and receptive. But when we are negative, we are secretive and unnecessarily critical, no matter how hard we try to listen. A negative attitude can cause even more harm to communication than failure to listen. That is why the effectiveness of listening in equally depends on both correct listening techniques and a positive attitude. The following attitudes are necessary for effective listening.
1. OK. The basis of approval is a non-categorical or objective attitude. Approval is in many ways the opposite of the critical, subjective attitude that often appears in everyday relationships. Expressing approval towards someone does not necessarily mean our agreement with what a person says or does, it is simply an affirmation that everyone has the right to feel, think and act as he thinks it is possible for him, no matter how this behavior seemed absurd. Approval is the willingness to listen to another. It means that the thoughts and words of others are worth our attention, we will not interrupt them or impose our words on them. Approval is also a positive assessment of another person as a person with all its shortcomings and virtues. Approval can be compared to sympathy and warmth, which is expressed in a smile or voice. But the expression of approval is possible even when such feelings do not exist in reality. It is in this case that it is necessary for effective communication with those we do not like, especially when listening to their complaints and criticism.
An approving attitude on the part of the listener creates an atmosphere of freedom and ease.
2. Empathic Listening . Empathy means understanding any feeling - anger, sadness, joy - experienced by another person and responding to your understanding of these feelings. In order to better understand a person, we seek to determine what meaning these feelings have for him. We experience the feelings of others as if they were our own, that is, we show sensitivity to others.
Empathy helps to balance self-interest with concern for others.
Empathic listening differs from reflective listening by setting, not by techniques. Both types of listening mean the same thing: attention and display of feelings. The difference lies in purpose and intent. The goal of reflective listening is to realize as accurately as possible the speaker's message, that is, the meaning of his ideas or experienced feelings; The goal of empathic listening is to catch emotional coloring of these ideas and their meaning for another person, to penetrate the system and understand what the message truly means and how the interlocutor feels at the same time. Empathic listening is a more intimate form of communication than reflective, it is the exact opposite of categorical, critical listening and is especially valuable in resolving disagreements and resolving conflicts.
Empathy is probably the single most important mindset for improving our listening skills and improving our dealings with others.
Selective listening. The reasons why people communicate are different. They are not always clear to themselves and even less clear to others. Sometimes people are just social by nature. When the purpose of communication is to obtain information, we must listen especially carefully. In addition, words are used to express feelings, which requires active methods hearings; in other situations we are strongly urged to do something. It is important in each case to clearly understand the purpose of communication, otherwise we will not understand the interlocutor.
Consider four types of communication goals: social, informational, expressive and incentive. It should be remembered that the speaker, as a rule, switches from one goal to another or pursues several goals at once.
Target social communication is to witness one's presence and maintain relationships, not to communicate anything substantive to each other. This type of communication usually consists of certain rituals: conversations about upcoming events, small talk or pleasantries. People tend to want to present themselves in a favorable light and avoid talking about things they don't want others to know about. Moreover, they take it for granted that others do the same. In this sense, social communication is basically a conscious exchange of superficial, meaningless phrases.
Listening correctly in this case means being ready to participate in the ritual. everyday communication. Otherwise, you may jeopardize your relationships with others. Sometimes the only thing required is a non-verbal response, such as a smile or a handshake. In other cases, a statement is required. social communication assumes that the interlocutors speak and listen in turn, without interrupting each other.
When the purpose of communication is informational, for example, discussing production issues, the content of the conversation is crucial. In this case, the purpose of communication is the exchange of information and factual information. And then listening correctly means accurately perceiving information, for which it is necessary to focus on the content of speech, understand the message, remember it. When receiving brief oral information, such as a date or an address, it is enough to repeat it in your mind, although for greater accuracy it is sometimes useful to write it down. When it comes to complex information besides the hearing, a recording is required. To improve the efficiency of information perception, reflective listening techniques are useful. Paraphrasing, clarifying, and summarizing should be used to test the accuracy of the message's meaning.
At expressive communication words are used mainly to express opinions and feelings. With permission problem situations, for example, production or family conflicts, the parties are usually convinced that one of the ways to understand each other's positions is mutual attention to experiences. In expressive communication, when the speaker has an urgent need to give vent to feelings, it is appropriate to apply the technique of non-reflective listening. But gradually, as the intensity of the speaker's feelings decreases, the need to be understood and approved in essence increases. In this case, reflective listening techniques are useful to convey the approval and understanding of the interlocutor. They are necessary when a person experiencing difficulties wants to find not only understanding, but also help. Empathic techniques are indispensable when there is misunderstanding or conflict in communication.
At motivating communication the speaker is trying to get the hearer to do or do something. The request can be anything: change your mind about something, do, take, donate, lead, give, etc.
The correct response in persuasive communication is to be clear about what is wanted of you. This is exactly the case when reflective listening plays an important role. A simple paraphrase helps to clarify and confirm a simple request. When the request is complex, you can use reflective listening techniques such as clarification, reflecting feelings, and summarizing. If motivating communication is accompanied by a sharp reaction, emotional tension, as sometimes happens when considering a complaint, reflective listening can be useful, especially at the beginning of the conversation.
As soon as it becomes clear what is required of you, you should establish feedback, that is, with your answer, show the interlocutor that he was understood correctly. Such an answer does not necessarily mean that you agree with the speaker or that you undertake to comply with his request. It only confirms that you understood the request and only certain response actions will follow. Since communication requires energy and effort, it must always be purposeful. The more accurately we can determine the purpose of the interlocutor, the more effectively we can listen to him. And we do it mostly right, relying on intuition and own experience but sometimes we make mistakes.
The purpose of communication of the interlocutor is often determined by his role and the nature of the relationship with us. In many cases leading role in communication play the environment or circumstances. In other cases, the speaker's purpose can be understood on the basis of such factors as the personality of the interlocutor, the specifics of the situation, or the commonality of his problems with ours. However, the importance of these conditions should not be overestimated. In a conversation with a specific interlocutor in familiar situations, we hear what we expect to hear. Therefore, a message that is not typical in the context of a given situation often goes unnoticed or is misunderstood.
The process of verbal formulation of thoughts and their understanding inevitably generates a deformation of the meaning of the message. And yet people understand each other. Understanding is constantly being adjusted, since communication is not just the transfer of information (knowledge, factual information, instructions, orders, business messages), but exchange feedback information. In this case, one should take into account the types of verbal communication, which include: monologue, dialogue, conversations (conversation), interviews, discussions, disputes, polemics, debates.
A statement without focusing on the interlocutor is in the form of a monologue. The amount of information loss in a monologue message can reach 50%, and in some cases 80% of the volume of the original information. Monologue in communication brings up people with a sedentary psyche, low creativity. Research shows that the most effective form of communication is dialogue.
Dialogue implies fluency in speech, sensitivity to non-verbal signals, the ability to distinguish sincere answers from evasive ones. At the heart of the dialogue is the ability to ask questions to yourself and others. Instead of giving peremptory monologues, it is much more effective to turn your ideas into questions, test them in conversation with colleagues, and see if they are supported or not. The very fact of the question demonstrates the desire to participate in communication, ensures its further flow and deepening.
The culture of behavior in any communication is unthinkable without observing the rules of verbal etiquette associated with the forms and manners of speech, vocabulary, i.e. with all the style of speech adopted in the communication of people. In a conversation, you must be able to answer any question.
In the verbal communication of people, business etiquette involves the use of various psychological techniques. One of them is the “stroking formula”. These are verbal turns of the type: “Good luck to you!”, “I wish you success!”, “No fluff, no feather!” Pronounced with any shades.
In the speech etiquette of business people great importance have compliments - pleasant words expressing approval, a positive assessment of the activity.
Talk is a verbal exchange of opinions, information; often used as a synonym for conversation. Conversation, conversation, discussion involve the presence of two or more participants who, in a relaxed atmosphere, express their opinions, thoughts on a particular issue. Discussion is conducted on a specific topic, and each participant expresses his point of view. The participants in the conversation ask each other questions to find out the opinion of the interlocutor or to clarify incomprehensible points of the discussion. The conversation is especially effective if there is a need to clarify any issue, highlight the problem. Interview - a specially organized conversation on social, scientific topics.
Dispute. The word serves to denote the process of exchange of opposing opinions. A dispute is understood as any clash of opinions, disagreements in points of view on any issue, subject, a struggle in which each side defends its rightness. There are other words in Russian for this phenomenon: dispute, discussion, controversy, debate, debate. Quite often they are used as synonyms for the word "dispute".
The word "dispute" came to us from the Latin language (disputar - reason, disputatio - debate) and originally meant the public defense of a scientific essay written to receive degree. Today, the word “dispute” is not used in this sense; this word is used to refer to a public dispute on a scientific and socially important topic.
Discussion (Latin discusso - research, consideration analysis) is such a public dispute, the purpose of which is to clarify and compare different points of view, search, identify the true opinion, find the right solution to the controversial issue. The discussion is considered an effective way of persuasion, as its participants themselves come to a particular conclusion.
Discussion is an exchange of opinions according to more or less certain rules procedures and with the participation of all or only some of those present at the meeting. In a mass discussion, all members, with the exception of the chairman, are in an equal position. There are no special speakers here, and everyone is present not only as listeners. Special question discussed in a certain order, usually in accordance with strict or slightly modified rules and under the chairmanship of an official.
Meeting , not furnished with formalities and devoted to the discussion of any particular issue, is usually called a mass rally. Commission meetings are the most frequent type of mass discussion. Regular business sessions of most public organizations are held in the same way as discussions of this type. Mass discussions are subject to the rules of parliamentary procedure. But sometimes the procedure is quite simple, informal. However, even in such cases there is a chairman who ensures that the discussion proceeds normally and only according to the agenda, so that no one takes a privileged position during the discussion and that as many competent participants in the meeting speak as possible.
A group discussion consists in discussing issues with a dedicated group in front of an audience. Like any form of discussion in front of the audience, it is a dispute. The purpose of the group discussion is to present Possible Solution problems or discuss opposite points perspective on controversial issues. But usually it does not resolve the dispute and does not persuade the audience to any uniformity of action.
Three to eight people take part in a group discussion, not counting the chairman. Her version - the dialogue includes only two participants. Participants must be well prepared, carry notes with statistical and other necessary data. They should discuss issues in a casual, lively manner, asking questions and making brief remarks.
Symposium - a series of speeches by a group of people with short speeches on the same topic. As in a group discussion, its goals are usually not to resolve a problem or dispute, but to present different points of view in order to broaden the horizons of the audience and influence it. The number of speakers should not exceed four or five, so as not to drag out the meeting and deprive each group member of the opportunity to develop a point of view on the issue under discussion. In most cases, the symposium adopted the procedure for both types of discussion; sometimes comments or questions from listeners are allowed.
Lecture, representing a single speech followed by questions from the audience and the lecturer's answers to them, is sometimes considered as a discussion. But it is more appropriate to talk about it in the section on the symposium. The lecture form is often used in the art of speech classes, since it is not related certain form and time.
Another character is controversy. This is evidenced by the etymology of the term: ancient Greek word polemicos means "belligerent, hostile". This is a dispute in which there is a confrontation, confrontation, confrontation of sides, ideas and speeches. Controversy can be defined as a struggle of fundamentally opposite opinions on a particular issue, a public dispute in order to defend, defend one's point of view and refute the opponent's opinion.
Controversy differs from discussion and debate precisely in its target orientation. The participants in the discussion and dispute, comparing contradictory judgments, try to come to a consensus, find common decision, establish the truth. The purpose of the controversy is different: it is necessary to defeat the enemy, to defend and approve one's own position.
However, a truly scientific debate is conducted not just for the sake of victory as such. Based on principled positions, polemicists decide socially significant issues, their speeches are directed against everything that interferes with effective community development. Controversy is the art of persuasion. She teaches to reinforce thoughts with convincing and undeniable arguments, scientific arguments. AT scientific environment practiced and debate . Word is French descent(debat - dispute, debate). Debate – Russian word recorded in the lexicon of the 17th century.
There is no single classification of disputes, although attempts are being made to systematize them. The main factors influencing the nature of the dispute and its features include the purpose of the dispute, the social significance of the subject of the dispute, the number of participants, and the form of conduct. According to the purpose, the following types of dispute are distinguished: a dispute over the truth, to convince someone, to win, a dispute for the sake of a dispute. The dispute can serve as a means to search for the truth, to test any thought, idea, to substantiate it. To find correct solution, polemicists compare the most different points perspective on a particular issue. They defend a thought against attack, to see what objections there may be to that thought; or, on the contrary, they attack the position expressed by the opponent in order to find out what arguments there are in his favor. In such a dispute, arguments are carefully selected and analyzed, the positions and views of the opposite side are carefully evaluated. Of course, such a dispute is possible only between competent people who know the problem and are interested in solving it. In addition to undoubted benefits, a dispute for the sake of truth can bring real pleasure and satisfaction to the participants in the dispute. As a result of honest mental struggle the person feels uplifted and better. And even if you have to retreat, give up positions, abandon the protected thought, then the unpleasant feeling of defeat recedes into the background.
The task of the dispute may not be to verify the truth, but to convince the opponent. This highlights two important moments. The arguing convinces the opponent of what he himself is deeply convinced of. But sometimes he also assures because it is necessary in line of duty, due to some circumstances, while he himself does not at all believe in the truth of what he defends, or in the falsity of what he attacks.
The purpose of the dispute is not research, not persuasion, but victory. Moreover, polemicists seek it for various reasons. Some believe that they are defending a just cause, defending public interest. They are convinced that they are right and remain on principled positions to the end. Others need victory for self-affirmation. Therefore, success in a dispute, high appreciation of others, recognition of their intellectual abilities, oratorical data. Still others just love to win, they want a spectacular victory. They are not shy about methods and means to win.
Quite often there is an argument for the sake of an argument. This is a kind of "art for art's sake". For such disputants, it does not matter what to argue about, with whom to argue, why argue - it is important for them to show off with eloquence. If you deny any position, they will definitely begin to defend it. Such polemicists can be found among young people.
The above classification of the types of disputes by purpose is conditional. In life, it is not always possible to clearly distinguish between them.
The nature of the dispute is also determined by the social significance of the problem under discussion. The subject of the dispute are questions reflecting universal interests. These, in particular, include the problems of ecology, the survival of mankind, and the preservation of peace on Earth. In the process of a dispute, national interests, the interests of certain social strata of society may be affected. Often it is necessary to defend group interests, for example, people of a certain profession, teams of individual enterprises, institutions. In a dispute, family and personal interests of the polemicists are protected.
The specifics of the dispute is affected by the number of people participating in the discussion of problems. On this basis, three main groups can be distinguished: dispute-monologue (a person argues with himself, this is the so-called internal dispute), dispute-dialogue (two persons argue), dispute-polylogue (conducted by several or many persons). In turn, a dispute-polylogue can be massive (all those present participate in the dispute) and group (the disputed issue is resolved by a selected group of persons in the presence of all participants).
Arguments can take place with or without listeners. The presence of listeners, even if they do not express their attitude to the dispute, affects the arguing. Victory in front of listeners brings more satisfaction, flattering self-esteem, and defeat becomes more annoying and unpleasant. Therefore, the participants in the dispute in front of the listeners must take into account those present, their reaction, carefully select the necessary arguments, more often show stubbornness in opinions, sometimes excessive vehemence.
In public life, one often has to meet with a dispute for listeners. The dispute is conducted in order to draw attention to the problem, to make a certain impression on the listeners, to influence in the necessary way. The form of the struggle of opinions leaves its mark on the dispute process. Disputes can be oral and written. Oral form suggests direct communication specific persons with each other, the written form is mediated communication. Oral disputes, as a rule, are limited in time and closed in space. Written forms longer in time.
In an oral dispute, especially if it is conducted in front of listeners, external and psychological aspects play an important role, for example, the manner of holding on confidently, speed of reaction, liveliness of thinking, wit. A timid, shy person usually loses compared to an overconfident opponent. Therefore, a written dispute is more suitable for clarifying the truth than an oral one. Disputes are divided into organized and unorganized (spontaneous).
Organized disputes are planned, prepared, conducted under the guidance of specialists. The polemicists have the opportunity to get acquainted with the subject of the dispute in advance, determine their position, select the necessary arguments, and think over the answers to possible objections of the opponents.
Disorganized, spontaneous disputes tend to be less productive. In such disputes, the speeches of the participants are not sufficiently reasoned, sometimes random arguments are given, not quite mature statements are heard.
Verbal sign systems have always been and, apparently, will be the main means of human communication. “The word is life itself,” said T. Mann. The fundamental condition for successful interaction is the ability of people to “find mutual language” is a language, not a gesture or posture. “The word,” writes psychologist A.R. Luria is both a means of contact and an instrument of complex mental activity. Practice testifies to the increasing importance of speech communications in the context of the complication of industrial contacts between people, in the process of relationships between managers and subordinates, the individual and the team. For correct presentation thought with the help of the word, it is necessary to carefully monitor the harmonious combination in the word of the functions of communication and generalization, communication and thinking.
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From the author's bookDon't neglect your choice the right remedy communication One of the key elements to consider is the choice of means and parameters of communication. Such a choice can be decisive for the future of your relationship with a surrendered person. Some conversations are much more
One of the ways a person communicates with other people is verbal communication. This is a method of communication with the help of words that convey this or that information. Along with it, non-verbal communication is also considered, when information is transmitted by facial expressions, gestures, and human behavior. All this has types and features of its manifestation, which you should be aware of.
A person from childhood studies the speech of the people around him. This allows him to express his thoughts and ideas in the future, so that those around him with whom he is in contact will know about them. Words can influence others. Words can control people. However, it is not always possible to find a common language.
Why is it so hard to get along with people? You yourself have probably come across such people with whom it is simply impossible to talk and negotiate. Either they contradict you, or they are rude, or they don’t understand, or they don’t hear what you are talking about. It is difficult to find a common language with those who do not hear anyone but themselves. This is the first reason for this state of affairs.
The second reason why it is so difficult to find a common language with people is the attempt to put your own interests and views above those of others. Please note that problems and scandals between people most often arise precisely when you or your opponent puts your opinion above someone else's. If you downgrade the other person's point of view, then naturally he will want to downgrade your opinion. If you consider your point of view to be more correct, this means insulting the personality of the interlocutor, whose opinion is considered incorrect.
People consider themselves better and more correct than others. If you consider someone worthless, below yourself, less correct and respected, then you express this with all your words and deeds. And how do you think that the person whom you humiliate feels at the same time? Aggression, anger, resentment. You would feel the same way. If you were humiliated, your opinion was insulted, considered “no one”, you would also be angry and offended. That's why people can't find a common language - they consider someone the best and the worst.
Every person has the right to respect and understanding. Even if your opinion does not coincide with the opinion of the other person, both of you are respectable people who should at least be accepted for who they are. You may not be best friends but respect each other's points of view. Neither you nor anyone else is better or worse. You are equal to nature. If you instill this in yourself, then you will begin to find a common language with other people much faster and easier.
What is verbal communication?
What is verbal communication? This is a two-way interaction of people, which uses language system, clear, understandable, expressive, accessible. A person can communicate with one or more interlocutors at the same time. They must all speak the same understandable language so that there is no misunderstanding. Verbal is a conversation at the level of words understandable to all interlocutors.
To date, there are many trainings that are aimed at improving speech skills. This suggests that people understand the need for the ability to communicate beautifully and correctly. The fact is that it is at the level of words that one can receive a positive or negative reaction in response. While you are talking, the interlocutor has emotions. Their color depends on what he hears from your lips.
Thus, verbal communication is a method of reproduction own thoughts and getting information from outside.
Contact between people occurs through communication. People communicate, use their language to convey information to each other. If earlier, when there was no language, people could express their thoughts through drawings and gestures, now a person uses language as a means of interaction.
In order for you to successfully develop relationships with different people, you must learn the art of communication. If a person knows few words, uses abuse, while picking his nose and constantly twitches, then he will call discomfort almost any interlocutor. Communication involves finding a special approach to each person. But there are basics that can be used in almost any situation.
- Let your interlocutor be the smartest and most interesting.
Communicate with a person in such a way that he feels smart, interesting and quick-witted. Often people make a mistake when they try to interrupt the speech of the interlocutors, to insist on their opinion, to convince them of something. If you remember, then in such situations disputes often arise and. You have not achieved trust and affection for yourself by your own methods. So they need to be changed.
And the surest way is to allow other people to be smart, interesting and quick-witted too. This does not mean that you become stupid and indifferent. On the contrary, your conversation is lively and interesting, while each of you can express your opinion, feel respect for yourself, see understanding (at best, support) in the eyes of the interlocutor. You are smart, and your interlocutor is smart. By your attitude towards him, you show that his thoughts and ideas are also reasonable, interesting, attractive, even if you have a different point of view.
- Listen to your interlocutor.
There is no better interlocutor than one who knows how to listen and not interrupt. bad habit many people is the desire to express their opinion as quickly as possible. The interlocutor speaks, and you stop listening to him, because your own thought has arisen. You want to express it as quickly as possible, which is why you interrupt the speech of another person.
Your interlocutor may pause to give you a chance to speak. But if you constantly interrupt, then your interlocutor may have a desire to communicate with you as little as possible. Why would another person communicate with someone who does not want to listen to him? Every person wants to be heard. And to interrupt his speech means to show your unwillingness to listen to him.
Learn not only to speak, but also to be silent. And your silence should be aimed at listening to the opinion of the interlocutor. Not just be silent, but listen to the speech, delve into its essence and continue the conversation.
Verbal and non-verbal communication
To convey your idea to another person, a variety of methods are used. Here communication is divided into verbal and non-verbal. A feature of verbal communication are words that are pronounced orally or in writing. A feature of non-verbal communication is gesticulation and human behavior.
People tend to communicate at the verbal level. When they see each other, they begin to say some words. This allows them to express their attitude, experiences, thoughts, ideas, etc. When people understand the same meanings under words, then it is easier for them to perceive each other. A barrier in verbal communication arises when interlocutors understand different meanings under the same words.
In addition to words, people are still moving. Their facial expression changes, arms, legs and body take certain poses. As contact occurs, some actions, reactions, and so on. All this is called non-verbal communication.
Usually a person perceives his interlocutor as a whole. If he perceives his words consciously, then he often does not pay attention to his facial expressions and gestures. The subconscious takes an active part in the interaction, which is why so often there is a feeling that you have been deceived in some way. This happens when the spoken words do not match the gestures and actions of a person.
- Verbal communication is often a conscious process of the one who pronounces the words and the one who perceives them.
- Non-verbal communication is often uncontrolled process when the body conveys the true attitude or desires of the speaker. His interlocutor(s) also unconsciously perceives his gestures. That is why sometimes there is a feeling of discrepancy between what was said and the “bodily” speech.
Non-verbal speech is also called "gesture language" or "body language". It includes:
- Gestures are hand movements that are made during communication.
- Mimicry is the facial movement of muscles during a conversation.
- Look - orientation, severity, change to certain words.
- Posture and gait - the position of the body while standing or moving.
Website psychological help the site recommends being active while communicating with people. Listen not only to what they say, but also to see what they do, what their facial expression, posture, etc. If a person can control his own actions for a couple of minutes, then he will turn off, because he will be busy thinking about what to say.
The body never lies, especially if a person does not control it. It can be used to recognize when you are lying at the level of words, and when they are telling the truth. Other communication barriers are:
- Phonetic - features of diction, pronunciation, intonation.
- Logical - a feature of thinking that does not coincide with the thinking of the interlocutor.
- Semantic - the difference in the meaning and meaning of certain words, postures, actions, which is observed with a difference in cultures.
- Stylistic - features of the construction of phrases and sentences that may be incomprehensible to the interlocutor.
Types of verbal communication
How does a person communicate with others? The following types of verbal communication should be considered:
- External speech.
- Oral speech. It, in turn, is divided into:
- Dialogic speech - two people speak in turn.
- Monologue speech - only one person speaks, and the rest listen to him.
- Tactile speech is the transmission of the alphabet at hand level. It is a way of communication between deaf and dumb people.
- Written speech. It, in turn, is divided into:
- Immediate - when the interlocutors instantly send a response. For example, rewriting via SMS or notes.
- Delayed - when the interlocutors communicate through letters that are sent to them after a while.
- Oral speech. It, in turn, is divided into:
- Inner speech.
Verbal speech is expressed in the following forms of communication:
- Dispute - communication at the level of disagreement, where everyone tries to insist on their opinion and convince the interlocutor (s).
- A conversation is a communication between people that takes place in a relaxed atmosphere, where everyone can express their thoughts, experiences, clarify some questions, etc.
- Discussion and debate is a discussion of a scientific or socially important topic in order to find solutions. Here everyone expresses his opinion, assumptions, theories, etc.
- An interview is a specially organized communication on scientific or professional topics.
- Assembly, etc.
What are the methods of effective communication? Only those methods that will help create a comfortable space for trusting communication are considered. In other words, you will not manipulate, but, on the contrary, you will communicate in such a way that the other person has confidence in you, a desire to open up, to voluntarily give you any information that you wish to receive from him (and even he himself wants something secret). tell).
Methods for effective communication:
- Feedback. “Did I understand you correctly, what did you mean by saying ... (and retell in your own words the meaning that was communicated to you)?”. You must show the person that you are listening. Nodding your head and sounding "Aha" is just listening. But trust comes from active listening, when you try to understand the information that is being given to you. Since you are listening and trying to understand, it means that you are not judging, especially if you just want to double-check the correctness of your understanding of what was said by the interlocutor.
- Arrangement. If a person asks you for something, then make a promise to fulfill the request (if, of course, you agree to do this). For example, if a person asks you not to tell anyone what you hear from him, then there is nothing difficult in shutting your mouth and not divulging other people's secrets, right? Therefore, agree on something with another person. This will allow him to understand that you can be trusted (if, of course, you keep your word).
- Before you know a person, get to know him. Engage in collecting information, getting to know the interlocutor if you do not know anything about him. This requires only one thing from you - to be silent and listen to everything that the other person says. You listen carefully, and it seems to your interlocutor that you are really passionate about his story. You collect information, and it seems to him that you understand him. And you feel good, and the interlocutor opens up before you.
- People are more likely to trust authorities. How to become such a person? You just need to position yourself as an authoritative person. Authority is a specialist, he knows everything, if you follow him, you will survive.
- It is easier to trust someone who has the same values as you. The one who has the same life priorities, problems and values, people trust more, because they unconsciously understand that they will be understood.
- People trust those who understand them. It should be noted that understanding is not the same as agreeing. You may not agree with what the person says, but if you understand their point of view, show empathy, and simply show that their opinion also has a right to exist, you will inspire confidence. You may disagree, have your own opinion, but it is important to understand that the other person has some other idea.
Features of verbal communication
The characteristic of verbal communication is that this species communication is available only to humans. To speak with others, you must first learn the words that are used in their environment. A person will not be able to express his thought if he cannot speak the language of other people, understand what he expresses, and coordinate it with the ideas that people form as a result of information perception.
An important feature of verbal communication is the ability to construct sentences in such a way as to express one's thoughts, beliefs, and ideas. They must not only be formed, but also transmitted in such a way that others understand them.
Speech should correspond to the situation and change, depending on social role and its direction. So, people maintain a distance between themselves, depending on the relationship they are in. Communication occurs at 4 levels:
- Intuitive - on the basis of slightly heard information, guesses and assumptions are built.
- Physical - touching and other types of contacts of interlocutors during communication.
- Logical - a clear transfer of information.
- Ethical - a change in intonation, timbre and other components of speech, depending on who the person is communicating with.
People rarely communicate with each other. Communication implies that people understand the meaning of each spoken word. The interlocutor says something, but may not mean what he says. And the person, in turn, under each word of the interlocutor understands the meaning that is familiar to him. Misunderstanding occurs because one does not know how to directly express his thoughts, and the second under each word understands something of his own. It turns out that people do not communicate with each other, but with themselves.
Communication with oneself occurs due to the fact that often the interlocutors are in their thoughts even in those moments when communication with other people takes place. While the interlocutor says something, the person thinks about what he will say next. That is why it sometimes happens that a person jumps from topic to topic without hearing what is being said to him. This person does not listen to his interlocutor, he is carried away by his thoughts.
Why don't people communicate with each other? Most likely, this comes from childhood, when everyone is taught not to listen to anyone but himself. There are people who from childhood are used to being silent while "adults are talking." There are people who are constantly listened to by others, so they are used to being each on their own wave. There are people who are accustomed not to specify the meaning of the words of their interlocutor, understanding by them what is convenient for them.
People communicate not with each other, but with themselves. This is a culture that can be re-educated, if you sincerely want it, in order to communicate more effectively with others.
Outcome
Verbal communication performs many functions in human life. Firstly, it allows you to transfer your thoughts, feelings, desires to other people. Secondly, it allows you to understand the thoughts and ideas of others. When people communicate with each other, they not only exchange information, but also influence. The result - communicating with certain people, a person involuntarily adopts their qualities, no matter how bad or good they may be.
When entering a new environment (starting a new job, making new friends, dating a new partner), consider whether you want to be like these people. If you start hanging out with a certain group (or at least one person who is a new acquaintance), you will soon become just like them.
Ordinary people forget this truth. They often change not for the better, because it is much easier to find a bad company than a good one. Successful people remember this, so they carefully select the society with which they are constantly ready to contact. They know that they will soon become like those with whom they often see each other, and they choose partners who can teach them something useful and good.
It doesn't matter which person or group of people you prefer. The longer you hang out with someone, the more you will become like them. People are not just attracted to each other. Usually they start relationships with those who are already somewhat similar to them or who embody the image of the person they want to be like.
Usually people do not know who they want to be, so they choose partners who have the same qualities as them. Often converge on bad qualities, which unites, since other representatives may not show understanding.
Do you want to be like the environment you are in? Soon you will become the same person as the people with whom you started communicating. It doesn't matter if you like them or not. You will still develop similar qualities. Accordingly, choose your personal environment carefully and remember that your acquaintances are images that you will soon become like.
2. Verbal means of communication3
3. Speech activity6
4.Conclusion6
References7
Introduction
Communication is a complex socio-psychological process of achieving mutual understanding between people.
Its main tools are verbal and non-verbal means of communication.
Verbal (from the Latin "oral, verbal") means is speech. With this, everything is more or less clear, but we communicate not only with the help of voice.
We convey most of our "messages" using non-verbal (non-verbal) communication.
Non-verbal communication - or body language - includes our facial expressions, gestures, eye contact, body postures, and even the intonation of our voice.
Verbal means of communication
Verbal communication for a person is the main one - I mean not the genesis of communication and not the “percentage of use”, but the universality of this method for a person, the universal “translatability” of any communication tools into verbal human language.
Verbal means include oral and written varieties of language.
Verbal communication is based on words, and the spoken word is the basis of all other forms of speech.
Any communication is realized in signs. A sign is a material object (object, phenomenon, event, action) that expresses instructions, designations and is used to acquire, store, process and transmit information.
O.S. Akhmanova considers a sign as a function of two functives (the expression functive and the content functive) and names three categorical features that determine the specific relationship between the expression plane and the content plane, which distinguishes a sign from a non-sign. Content and expression are not fixed by nature, and the relationship between them arises as a result of the agreement of people.
Moreover, each unit (sign) must always be equal to itself. These characteristics are common to all signs. The study of signs and sign systems is in the field of semiotics. Sign systems include human.
The means of verbal communication is speech, which in turn is the implementation of language.
Language is a system of signs that serves as a means of human communication, mental activity, a way of expressing a person's self-consciousness.
According to this definition, language is identified with other sign systems. Such a specific area of semiotics and linguistics as pragmatics studies the functioning of linguistic signs in speech.
Pragmatics deals with the study of all aspects related to the addressee of speech, the speaking subject, the situation of communication. Linguistic pragmatics is directly related to communication. The benefit of words for people as participants in the communication process is that words allow us to communicate with each other, without any need to carry objects around us with us.
A special section of philology - semantics deals with the study of the various meanings of words. This is the second component of verbal communication.
The third component of verbal communication is syntax. Syntax studies the structure of words and phrases, as well as whole sentences (complete thoughts).
Words are organized into sentences, paragraphs and phrases. Combining all three components of verbal communication (phonemes, semantics and syntax), we get a language.
Verbal behavior, whether spoken or written, is equally useful for conveying information, intentions, and feelings.
Words and their graphic equivalents carry meanings (content, meaning).
They are embedded in messages that must be decrypted by the addressee.
Communication between people is sometimes so subtle that if the interlocutors do not have common code and the same background knowledge, the addressee will not be able to draw a conclusion about the essence of the statement. The context of the situation does not always help.
One of the advantages of using language instead of non-verbal communication is that language serves as the best vehicle for conveying the speaker's ideas and intentions.
In an extreme case, the speaker can always change his message or provide the listener with missing details for better understanding.
Of course, a situation may arise in which neither the speaker nor the listener will achieve clarity of the message, since they do not want to be heard by others.
If business partners speak a little quieter, they will be protected from all strangers.
The interlocutors know the necessary extralinguistic context, others do not.
In verbal communication, the means of transmitting information is text or discourse.
Non-verbal components of communication are also considered a form of communication that is not related to the language itself.
Speech without non-verbal components of communication is incomplete communication.
Speech activity
Speech activity is understood as a situation when a person uses language to communicate with other people. There are several types of speech activity:
Speaking is the use of language to communicate something;
Listening - perception of the content of the sounding speech;
Letter - fixing the content of speech on paper;
Reading is the perception of information recorded on paper.
Conclusion
Verbal communication (sign) is carried out with the help of words. Verbal means of communication include human speech.
Non-verbal communication- this is a side of communication, consisting in the exchange of information between individuals without the help of speech and language tools presented in some symbolic form. Such means of non-verbal communication as: facial expressions, gestures, posture, intonation, etc. perform the functions of supplementing and replacing speech, conveying the emotional states of communication partners.
The instrument of such "communication" is the human body, which has wide range means and methods of transmitting or exchanging information, which includes all forms of human self-expression.
Bibliography
1. Ovchinnikova I. G., Uglanova I. A. Computer modelling verbal communication- : Flint; 2009, 136 pages
2. Shipilova O. Non-verbal communication. Theories, functions, language and sign: - Humanitarian center; 2009, 248 pages
3. Shipitsyna L. M., Zashchirinskaya O. V. Non-verbal communication in children with normal and impaired intelligence: - Speech; 2009, 128 pages
4. Russell J. Non-verbal communication. - 2012, 107 pages
